#sunday is finish all the packing that isn't done because tomorrow is moving day

[ratherembarrassing]

it's sunday and i am already tired from next week

[pbandjesse]

James got some good pictures of me today. Made me feel very pretty. Very cool. Today was a better day but it was a more sleepy day I just wasn't able to shake how tired I was.

I didn't get to bed till really late last night. I was up talking to my co-workers and dealing with a bunch of stuff and I didn't go to bed till after 1. I woke up at 8:30 when my alarm went off. And bargain with myself that I would sleep until 9 but I knew I had to go and do laundry. It was falling all over the floor. Because I have multiple pairs of sheets and duvet covers in the basket right now. I did end up separating out just the clothes to wash and I will worry about the other stuff later because it's probably going to have to go to the dry cycle more than once. But I got up and I went and around my clothes through. I got dressed. And then I laid back down and watch a video and fell asleep. Thankfully I had set an alarm for when the clothes needed to go into the dryer. And when they did and I got back upstairs I fell asleep again.

I woke up at 11 when James came over. He brought my Ramen from Sunday. And he brought up my clothes the dryer and I heated up my noodles. He helped me put everything away and I finish getting dressed and did my makeup. And then can we walked together to the bus.

I got to school around 12:30 and I sat outside because it was so nice. I ended up talking to a nice old man who had just retired last year but had gone to that school back in 1967. He was such a sweetheart. He told me his whole life story. And then his daughter's life story. It was nice talking to him.

And then I went inside and got stuff ready for the day. And we had a really good day. Nothing too exciting happened except for the banana costume I brought for Damien which was hilarious. And everyone wanted to wear it. We work on our sculpture stuff and they still didn't take any pictures for their stop motion animations but they're getting good work done. And they're working on Teamwork. Because that is still a struggle. Sharing and working together to achieve a goal. But it's fine. They're all going to have something really cool at the end I'm sure.

The day was fine. They all did a good job and there's only minimal issues. We finished up for the day and I took them to dismissal. And as we were waiting for parents one of my students was flailing around dancing and accidentally elbowed my tiny child Destiny right in the face. And at first she was just crying a lot and she calm down. And said she was fine. And then about 10 minutes later she comes back because her grandmother wanted to talk to me because she had a big bruise on her face. A bruise that was not there when I had seen her. So we went and got an ice pack and she'll be fine she wasn't upset. Grandma was upset but she's always mad so what can I do. At least she didn't call the cops which is apparently something she has done in the past.

All of the kids were gone by 5:30 and I decided to walk up to the grocery store. Now that I know that there's a giant up there. Going to save so much money.

I got a lot of stuff. Some salad stuff and some avocados and berries and pretzels and M&Ms. Got some juice. Got some eggs. And I didn't spend a whole lot. It was nice to be in a real grocery store. And I even got to use James's phone number for the discount thing so that felt very coupley.

I went and grabbed the bus home. And I got back to my neighborhood. My upstairs neighbor texted me and asked if she could borrow something and once I was finished eating dinner she came down each other for a while. Both of our job issues. And it was just really nice to see her because we haven't really hung out since I started teaching in October.. We both are just too busy. I really like her a lot though and glad that she reached out.

But I was too tired to hang out. I came back inside and laid on the couch for a while and watch videos. Eventually I moved to my bed. And now I'm just about ready to go wash my face and go to sleep. I'm hoping to wake up in the morning and paint. That's like my ideal thing to do tomorrow. Wake up and start laying out a painting I'm not positive I have any paper. If I do not I will be sad. I know I don't have any more of a nice paper but I do have some small stuff. We'll see what the thickest piece I have is. I think I have some cardstock at least. I just want to make something. I also want to vacuum. So vacuuming and painting. That's a good plan before work.

James is at a weird Tuesday night overnight right now. And I hope he's having a good time because he hasn't texted me except to send me my ootd photo. So I hope he isn't too stressed out over there.

Just like I hope you are all not too stressed out. Sleep well everyone. Be safe out there.

[frogsandfries]

Sunset came swiftly

One second, I can see fine by the light, literally not five minutes later the lights came on. Fortunately just in time for me to get all the first screws into the first 2×4. It took for freaking ever to get just eight screws into the board without cracking it completely!! I hate cutting wood, I hate planing, I loathe sanding. The freaking storage bin was frigid compared to outside. I guess in the morning, I'll try to get all the first screws into the second board. Then I have to go back and fix the longer board to the shorter board, then go back and do it again--I have to attach two nails to the top and two to the bottom boards, and I have to do so twice. So that will definitely take me all day.......delightful..... The worst part is probably trying to be patient so I don't damage the lumber.

I need to remember to use a generous quantity of silicone between the boards. I want a waterproof, windproof seal everywhere between this shell and the rest of my space. I'm beginning with silicone and leveling up to spray foam. The other thing I want to avoid is trotting my van all over the place with raw spray foam all over the place and raw wood exposed......

I think tomorrow we need to move the van.....I don't want to test anyone's patience or anything.....

The fun thing is going to be screwing the paneling to the frame. Grumpy that it suddenly got too cold to be outside. I guess I should be grateful tomorrow is only Saturday. I have all of Saturday to put the frame together...... Then..........I actually don't know. My dad is in charge after that and that drives me nuts. I personally want to get the frame up immediately, get the roof cut--I've waited long enough, I've been patient enough. I don't know if I'll be able to afford the drawers and loft, I don't even know when the roof will be done so I can actually work on my furniture. I don't really even know how any of this is going to happen..... Ideally, I would finish the two sides of the frame tomorrow, get the van cleared out, and somewhere between Saturday and Sunday, my dad would do me the mercy of cutting the ceiling. But he won't do that till I tear out the original ceiling, which I didn't want to do. So I have to pack everything out of the van and pull out the ceiling, which there isn't really any point to doing till the frame is done. That basically means at this point, I'm yet another weekend behind, but I think I might as well go ahead and purchase some of the materials, at least for the futon, and at least get measurements to start trying to work out the drawers. I'm seeing tremendous quantities of screws in my future. Especially because I'm using two screws per end of two foot 2×4, and when I do the futon, it'll be two screws per end of three or four foot wide board, for a length of around sixty inches.

There's still plenty to do. For a long time, there's going to be tons of stuff to do. But mostly I need to get this van back in a state where it can be moved and I can have heat.

Having heat no matter where I am is just a fraction of what I'm getting worked up about. I'm also getting agitated because November is almost over meaning it's been four months that my studio practice has stagnated. That's one third of a year. That's too close to half a year. That's too much time for me. But by the same stroke, what the fuck am I gonna do about it, unless I can just finally get my dad to give in, which is never fucking going to happen. There's still so much to do on this van, but getting the fucking roof done would put a massive hurdle behind me.

I guess I sort of understand though, like chances are, if I fuck up in a big way, my dad is going to be behind the wheel when my fuck up comes crashing down...... perhaps literally. But I need the ceiling done. I need the bedding off the floor, I need to work on my studio and my kitchen. Mostly, my studio is my priority. I don't understand why a brace wouldn't work. Brace it, build the brace up. I wanted to use that space on the roof for my propane. Once I can secure and conceal the propane, I'm free again. It feels like my dad never feels the right kind of urgency. He doesn't feel urgency about his bus--not the kind of urgency that moves him to action.

[pbandjesse]

Today has been a steller day. Its raining outside and I just feel really cozy and good. And I get to go home tomorrow!! Im really happy.

I slept okay last night. I didnt want to get up. But James was up already and we both had to go to work. I went and got dressed. My hair was bad because of the humidity. But i still felt cute.

James left and I finished getting myself together. It was raining but only a little. I put on a rain coat and headed out. I went to mcdonalds and had breakfast. And got to work right on time.

I was mostly training today. I got to learn about game making and the group was really sweet. A Jewish school and the kids taught me some words in Hebrew. It was neat.

Half way through the class I got a phone call. I missed the call but he texted me right away. I called him back but he didn't pick up. So I texted him and then he called me again. And it was Marshall's manager from the actual teaching position. And he offered me the job. They got the funding. I'm so excited. It just like all feels like it's settled in side of me that everything is okay. Like this is what was supposed to happen. So I just got to be like wildly excited but very soft way if that makes sense. Like I don't feel jumping around the room excited. But I feel like yes this is what was going to happen.

I went back to the class and told to other girls I was teaching with and they were so excited for me. I emailed my manager there to let him know that my schedule will change again. And going forward I'm going to be working at the BMI Tuesday Wednesday and Thursday mornings. Feels nice to have and idea of where my schedule will be.

Today was also really good there because I got to see my embroideries in the shop for the first. And that was really cool to see. There are three of them there and I took some pictures of it so that James can put them on the Etsy Instagram. All of my coworkers are also really supportive about it.

The rest of the day there was good. I got to assist with the balloon powered car project. And then I got to lead one. I still have trouble getting the class to hear me in that big room. But all the kids were very sweet and we actually got more done in my class then we had in the one I shadowed. So that was nice.

Once the kids were gone I didn't really know what to do with myself. There wasn't really much supplies to be done. I had my salad. And then I cut some straws and then I left. So I actually had time to come home before my planned interview with the Walters today.

I got back here at like 2:15. And I made a hot dog. I was so overheated. So I fix my makeup and try to cool off. I'm really glad I ate. And then I walked over to the coffee shop.

I never been in the shop before because it looks really really fancy from the outside. But the prices are actually very reasonable and I think I'll definitely go back. They have lots of vegetarian food on their menu. I knew I was meeting with Annie but I didn't exactly remember if she was the blond woman I talked to you before. So I Googled her and I found her LinkedIn profile. Turns out yes she was exactly what I thought she was. And then she walked in the door not long after that.

I was straight up with her. I had got a job today. She bought me an iced tea. And we talked. We talked about art and my background. My passions. Things I love to do and the things I love to share with other people. We looked at some of my art. And I showed her the video of me firing the cannon. She asked me a million questions about working on historic ships. And honestly I would love working with her. But I'm just so busy. And now that I have this other job plus I've moved historic ships just to the weekend. She kind of was like let's just keep an open conversation about me possibly coming on at some point. And I felt good about that but then I asked what day of the week would be best for her. And she said Saturday or Sunday. And I said I can work with that. So right now if I do get an offer from them. Or a second more formal interview. I'm going to ask historic ships to add me scheduled Fridays and Saturdays. Including a Saturday overnight. And then I will work at the Walters a couple Sundays a month. I'm going to try my best to always have that one weekend a month off so that I don't die. Or just get burned out. But I really think it's important that I get into the Walters. And maybe at some point all transition more over to there. She said some really really nice things about my passion for programming. And she really thought that that was something I should do. That it's not as scary as I have built it up to be. And that She understands where I'm coming from with my insecurities about it. About being in charge. But she made me feel very confident.

I left an interview with really good feelings. I was so jazzed. And I came home and felt really really good. I talked to Dad for a while. And then I went and worked in my studio. I'm almost done my diorama for this week. I'm actually going to go down and paint a few more things that should be dry now. Cuz I really need to be done tonight. There isn't going to be a lot of time to do it tomorrow.

I vacuumed and hung out. James came to give me hugs and congratulations. He picked up his laundry in his bag. And he headed back home. And I've just been chilling since then. I took a shower and wash my hair. I've made sure that my bag was all the way packed. And it's really just been a really nice night.

I'm working historic ships tomorrow but it's a weird shift. I'm only working till 1. But I think that's fine. It actually works out really well for me because the new job wants me to come in to sign paperwork. He hasn't sent me an email yet to tell me when I'm supposed to come in. So I'm going to email him in the morning if I don't hear from him. He said around 2. But he also said somewhere between 2 and 4. So I'm not entirely sure which end of that Spectrum. But it'll be really good practice from getting downtown over there. And then around 6 me and James are heading to Philadelphia. Us. So that'll be good with me and not here alone for 4 days. I'm really excited for this whole weekend. I think it's going to be really nice. Even if James is very nervous about meeting my parents again.

I hope you all have a great night tonight. Sleep well. Stay dry out there. And have a nice day tomorrow