#still just so baffled that the headphones I'd been having issues with for like a year suddenly worked after I got a new pair

[girlitfeelsgood]

Thinking about how a year ago my airpods were just not working, like I had so many problems with them, so for christmas my mum got me a new pair and then I just didn't get around to unpacking them and just kept using the old pair and after a while I realised all of the issues were gone, and now it's november and my old airpods still work perfectly fine 😭

[saintedbythestorm]

Despite only like 4 hours of sleep... I did manage that psychologist call!

All in all, it went well. She was open to hear that some things may have been misinterpreted by her about when my big teenage depression went away. She listened to a bit more about my gender feelings, and completely understood how I had a hard time to pin point all these things that made me feel the way I do about it, as I've had 17 (fucking) years to think about it. How all these small things that paint the big picture in how i feel are just... normal to me now? Like I've done my questioning around it for all these years and it's pretty clear to me where I fall on it and such. She totally understood that, and how it's hard to explain all of that. Did ask if despite all the alienation I've felt I'd still be uncomfortable with my body and such and I was like oh yeah no doubt. So it was all clear there, and she wasn't questioning my feelings on it and such.

She did seem a bit reluctant to listen to what I had to say about how she mentioned gender affirming surgeries though. I did bring up to her how not all trans people end up doing these and how the surgeries were like 10 years out so it just seemed odd to mention them. But she just kept repeating how she only mentioned it to be about how the gender stuff wasn't all of my issues (yeah no shit sherlock) and how I also had psychological issues. Which like yeah duh, but that doesn't mean that it didn't make it sound like she was poorly informed about trans care?? Which she seemed to have a hard time taking in. So in the end I just had to give up on that one, she clearly wasn't receptive to what I was trying to say. Felt a bit defensive on her part if I'm gonna be completely honest (I've heard a lot of people can struggle with that though when we trans peeps try to teach them about our experiences so can't say I'm super surprised here...)

On a funnier part, she was kinda baffled by my giant headphones that I had on. I was listening to music during the whole thing. She seemed to find that odd 😂 "while we're having this call?" She said. "Yep, helps me keep calm. I get very nervous talking to doctors and such." I told her back. I think it definitely befuddled her, in a sort of funny quirky way. She let it be after asking though. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Helped me A LOT though. Nothing like a Shut your mouth to keep me calm ✨️(imagine if she had known that was what I was listening to 😂😂😂)

Started the.. test? Questionnaire?? Fuck if I know what to call it... but that thing that was requested by the gender clinic. Was the one I found online, and so far so good. We couldn't finish it today, but what we did do felt ok. The depression part made me laugh several times though, cause I had to technically split my answers which is part of the issues I have with being labelled as depressed so fucking quickly by professionals. Cause it literally went "yes as a teen" or "yes after whatever the fuck that thing at 18 years old was" or "only on those meds i just got off" 😂 Like it's soooo spread out and incoherent. And the only time I can say 100% for sure it is depression is during the teenage years. So that part was just a darn mess c:

Starting to think she is open to my idea of it being PTSD though, cause she even apologised for the part about that being like "have you witnessed or been subjected to (only physical things)?" and like completely ignoring even the possibility you may have it due to psychological trauma. Basically she acknowledged that the system is quite broken there, which felt awesome cause I've been saying that for like 10 years lol.

But yeah, other than that we also had time to talk about OCD (with what matched not really seeming like a concern) and social anxiety (which I do have so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯). After that we were out of time so we will see what we end up with in the end lol.

But yeah, it went a lot better this time at least and we will continue the test thingy next time. We will see what happens with that.

So now, all I can do is wait for the next call and hope that goes well too.

[reddeadmort]

Hmm dunno if you do modern Arthur ones but I'd love a modern or time-travelling Arthur reacting to snapchat filters. Can includes other gang members too, whomever you feel like writing.

Thank you for being so patient @nordic-breeze ! This started as just a general Arthur and social media, but then kind of accidentally evolved into a slight commentary of issues that women sometimes face. Not too sure on this one, but I hope it’s along the lines of what you were hoping for :) 

If anyone wants a bit of background reading/scene setting, I wrote some HC’s for my take on Modern Arthur - they can be found here. 

Btw, the catcalls/comments are real ones, taken from videos on youtube. And, tbh, they are some of the milder ones that feature.

Modern Arthur x f! reader | “Surely that’s enough photos now….”

Guidance: Minor fluff, protective Arthur, catcalling/sexual comments/threats

Words: 2.1k

“I just….. I don’t understand? Why do I need to be in the picture, surely it’s the skyline they want to see?”

Arthur was standing in the doorway of your balcony, facing away from you, looking out over the city. He was topless, leaning against the door frame with his arms and ankles crossed.

“Arthur, they’re following you to see YOU, not some boring modern buildings” you chuckled, as you took yet another photo.

You’d waited a while before introducing Arthur to the concept of social media; you didn’t really use it all that much yourself. You quite enjoyed using Snapchat, it was an easy way to keep up to date with your friends back home. Arthur had asked what you were doing during one of your selfie sessions sat next to him on the sofa; you’d shown him some of filters, but they completely befuddled him. 

When you’d flicked on the flower crown, he’d looked frantically between your head and the face on the screen, muttering “but there’s nothing there…” to himself. He’d practically jumped over the back of the couch when you’d done a face swap with him; it was all a bit too much. He’d spent the rest of the evening in a bit of a confused grump, occasionally pausing Netflix to ask a question -  “why do people want to take so many pictures of their own face”, “why do they change how you look so much” “why would you want to look like a dog”. You tried explaining that it was just a bit of fun, but knew when a concept was a lost cause.

Arthur was much happier to help you out with your Instagram. You didn’t post that often, mostly nice photos you’d taken on your treks. But Arthur enjoyed helping you with pictures, and the man did have an artistic flair; he’d gotten pretty good at framing the photos. He’d even started taking some pictures of his work building treehouses, mostly just to show you. Eventually, you managed to persuade him that posting these to Instagram might help promote his business; he’d agreed, but only under the proviso that you dealt with the actual posts/timings/hashtags etc. You had got a few good leads for his work through Instagram, but those jobs were mostly for rich families that had more money than sense. Arthur didn’t love doing these projects, they always ended being more 4 bedroom houses on stilts than rustic treehouses, but they did mean that he could afford to do builds for local charities at less than cost price.

But you knew that the main reason people followed Arthur was for Arthur, no matter how beautiful his work was. And so here you were, once again making him reluctantly pose for yet another picture.

“There we go, plenty to choose from now. You’re free to go now Arthur.” He let out an audible sigh of relief as he walked over to you to have a look at what you’d taken.

“I really don’t see why this is a good picture. All you can see is me pretty much.” Arthur shook his head. “Those ones that fella took of animals back in my time were much better”.

“Arthur, I’ve got 4 words for you: shoulder to waist ratio.”

“I’ll pretend I know what that means” he grunted as he pulled his t-shirt back on over his head. It had a Thor design on it; Arthur had become quite keen on Marvel. That photo you’d posted on your Instagram of him messing around, pretending to pull something out of the ground (copying the first Thor film), had got thousands of likes, despite you only having a few hundred followers. It was at that point you’d decided to set up his own account.

“Anyway Y/N, we best be goin’ to the gym if we want to eat before bed.”

“Yeh, good point, I’ll go grab my stuff.” You went to grab your workout bag with your clothes in from your bedroom as Arthur went and got changed into his, then started the short walk to the gym. As you walked, you chatted, then Arthur asked you a question.

“Here, Y/N, how come you don’t wear your gym clothes? Why’d ya always get changed there? We only live a few streets away.”

“Because, Arthur, I don’t like the attention I get. It’s not so bad when we walk together, but if I’m by myself…. It makes me uncomfortable. It can be pretty bad even if I’m not wearing my workout stuff.”

“I don’t understand? What attention?” 

Sighing, you came to a stop, looking around.

“Look, Arthur, see that group of lads sat outside that shop?” you pointed up the street. “I see them a lot. I hear them a lot. Just walk behind me a bit, close enough to hear what they say, not so close that they think we’re together.”

“Alright, but I don’t really know why. They usually don’t say anything to me.”

“Arthur, that’s because you’re not a… never mind, just follow and listen, okay? And only listen. Whatever you hear, DON’T do anything, promise?”

Arthur grunted as you walked off, then followed behind as instructed. As you suspected, even though you weren’t wearing your gym leggings and sports top, the lads quickly took notice of you.

“Hey what’s up girl, how you doin’!”

“Smile baby!”

“That’s a gorgeous ass, I’d like to hold you down while I slap it”

“Hey bitch, we’re complimenting you, you should thank us!”

You controlled your breathing and continued to walk at a steady pace, stopping in a doorway further up the street so Arthur could catch up. When he did, he looked furious.

“I’m gonna kill ‘em.” He muttered through clenched teeth.

“Arthur, you can’t. And anyway, there’s like 6 of them and one of you. Let’s not get you arrested or killed, alright?”

“But…. they shouldn’t be sayin’ those things (Y/N)! It ain’t right.” You could see him clenching and unclenching his fists.

“No Arthur, it isn’t. And I hate that because of men like them I’ve changed my behaviour and changed what I wear. But I do it to try and make myself feel safer, cause one day, someone may do more than just say things.”

Arthur wrapped his large arms around you and hugged you tight. “I’m sorry (Y/N), sorry that I didn’t understand.”

“It’s alright Arthur, now come on, we want to get to the gym while it’s not too busy.”

Arthur was quieter than normal as you walked the rest of the way – you could tell he was mulling things over. Being yanked from his time into the modern world had made him a bit naïve; it baffled him that 100 or so years later, some of the same issues still existed. 

——-

Arthur was indeed thinking about what he’d heard, but he was also thinking about what he himself had said in the past. Some of those off-hand comments to prostitutes in the saloons, things he’d said to Karen when she’d been drunk…….

You thought he was a good man, and here and now he’d done nothing to prove you wrong, but every so often a memory of his past would float up, reminding him of the things he used to do. But he’d been given a second chance - this time, he was determined to do better.

—–

You had a good workout; you always did with Arthur. You would chat and laugh together, and he was always great at motivating and encouraging you. You helped out each other’s routines where you could, but one thing you could not do was spot him. For god’s sake, the man benched way more than you even weighed. When it came time for this part of his workout, you left him with some of the other gym guys he’d grown friendly with and went to do your cardio. You didn’t love running on a treadmill, but in the city it was really the only option.

You were in your own little world when you noticed a man stood to your side talking to you. He was smiling at you; you took your headphones out, assuming he wanted to ask how much longer you’d be.

“Hello gorgeous.” Those words, from someone you didn’t know, gave you chills. “I’d love to give you some tips.”

“I’m alright thanks” you said as you gave a slight smile. It was one that you’d carefully crafted over the years; not quite big enough to encourage someone, not too small as to risk being called rude.

“No, sweetcheeks, you realllllly need my help. Here…..” As the man said it, he stepped even closer and put his hand on your back, while you were still jogging.

You slammed the stop on the machine and turned as quickly as you could away from him.

“I said I’m fine, please don’t touch me.” You were forceful, but not loud – you really didn’t want to cause a scene in the middle of the gym.

“Bitch, you need my help. You need teaching a thing or two.” The man grabbed at you again, this time managing to get your wrist. He was big, strong, you tried to pull away but you couldn’t. Sod not causing a scene, you thought, I’m getting this fucker banned.

You were about to scream at the man when suddenly he let you go. This had something to do with the fact that an enraged, sweating Arthur had grabbed him by the front of his shirt and was practically lifting him off the ground. Arthur wasn’t much larger than him, but much stronger; Arthur wasn’t a poser, he worked out for strength, relaxation, not definition.

“I think the lady said she’s fine without you goddammit” he snarled into the man’s face.

“What the fuck do you care buddy” the man retorted back, pushing Arthur away. “Me and this bitch need to do some more talking.” This man either had balls of steel or was a complete moron. You suspected the latter; a case of more muscles than brain cells.

“No, mister, me and you need to do some talkin’. And I think my friends might want to help with that.“ The man paled as he finally looked past Arthur.

Turning, you saw what he’d just seen; 3 of Arthur’s gym friends, each of them the same size or even larger than Arthur. You knew these guys, they were always polite, always happy to help you when some other arsehole had left some massive weights on a stand you wanted to use. And, as an added bonus, one of them was the gym’s manager.

“I’ll finish this with you another time girly” the man hissed at you, before quickly turning and walking away as Arthur took a step forwards.

“No he bloody won’t. Y/N, I’m so sorry about this, I’ll go and get him revoked right away” said the manager. “I’ll also make sure that the office send round his picture to all the local gyms, try and stop him doing it elsewhere. If you want me to ring someone, just say.” You nodded and smiled, as the others went back to what they were doing. Arthur stayed with you, checking your wrist.

“You alright (Y/N)? I’m sorry for intervenin’, I know ya could’ve handled him, I just saw red. Especially after what you showed me earlier.”

“Yeh, I’m fine, thanks Arthur” you smiled at him as he rubbed your bruised wrist. “I just wish it wasn’t something I had to deal with, you know?”

“Yeh, I know. I just don’t understand why nothin’ much has really changed. At least back with the gang I could deal with someone that did stuff like this properly.” As you looked into his eyes, you could see that glimmer of animalistic rage that appeared occasionally. Arthur had done well to adjust to modern life, but you knew that sometimes he struggled with not being able to fight his way out of situations. It had worked well for him for years back in his time - to a point anyway.

“Come on Arthur, why don’t we go and do a little bit on the punching bags to cool off. We can take a few more pictures.”

Arthur groaned. “Surely we’ve got enough pictures already?”

“Stop your whining, I know you secretly love the attention.” You jokingly stuck your tongue out out him. “Tell you what, I’ll treat you to dinner on the way back after, to say thanks for being my big burly cowboy.” You knew Arthur liked it when you called him a cowboy, it always made him laugh and think of some of those ridiculous films.

“Sound’s like a plan, Y/N. As long as I getta choose.”

“So, Five Guys again then.” Arthur grinned as you sighed, smiling, and went to finish your workout.