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whatsk-poppinhomies · 1 year ago

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Pairing : Seo Changbin x F!Reader TW : reader suffers from migraines ; arguments ; i'm gonna make this one absolutely vicious, i love writing arguments ; angst of course as usual ; Word Count : 2.6k Request : @kurolils : I'll try not to give a lot of details cause it's your story not mine but I was thinking of something angsty (ofc wtf) with changbin (ofc wtf) , like the reader and him got into a really bad argument (you can decide the plot of that) and she has really bad migraines (I'm relating here) so when they're mad at each other, she doesn't want to be pushy pr clingy so she doesn't say anything to him but when the migraine gets like really bad, she calls him :) AN : migraines are so fricking bad and I hope yours don't affect you too badly :'( BUT! It definitely isn't abusive to send in another request, send in all the requests you want!!! I love it! I love your ideas! And Binnie definitely needs more attention in my ask box (and in my masterlist)!

Here comes another one, you thought to yourself as you squeezed your eyes shut, trying to mentally ward off the sudden throbbing in your head, pinging right behind your eye. Just one more hour until you could get off work and go home, and then you’d see your boyfriend who always managed to make you feel better… Although you weren’t sure if the migraine actually went away or if his presence alone was enough to have you forgetting that it was there in the first place.

“Is it bothering you again?” Your coworker asked, leaning across the counter that you had been slouched over, trying to block out anything that would only add to the pain in your head. You simply grunted in agreement, not daring to lift your head, worried that the bright fluorescent lights would only trigger the migraine to start full force once again. “It’s dead here today, you can go home if you want. I’m sure the last thing you want to deal with are customers.”

He was right, the store was always dead at the beginning of the week, and you hated being scheduled those days. “You’re sure you’ll be okay?” You asked, your head still buried in your arms. He hummed softly in agreement, gently patting your shoulder before making his way around to the back of the counter to take your spot. “Thanks… I’ll cover one of your shifts if you ever need me to.” You said as quietly as possible, worried that your own voice meeting your ears would only worsen the throbbing in your head.

“Don’t worry about that, just text me when you get home so I know you made it there okay.” And you nodded to his words, pulling your sunglasses out of your bag and placing them on before walking out of the store. He was always so nice, he looked out for you, and in a way, he reminded you a lot of your boyfriend, that’s why it was so easy to get so close to him. You’d have to remember to thank him when you got home, but all that was on your mind right now was the pleasant thought of going home, closing all the blinds, and waiting that extra hour for Changbin to get home so you could cuddle up next to him.

You hadn’t realized that you had fallen asleep on the couch, but you were actually quite happy that you did. By the time Changbin walked through the front door and your eyes slowly opened, it felt like you were in the clear, the banging pain in your head had all but completely subsided. “You’re home early.” Changbin commented, noticing that all the windows had been practically blacked out by the shutters and the shades, he knew what it meant, and he kept his voice as low as possible as he kicked off his shoes and walked over to the couch where you were laying. “Did it get bad again?”

Slowly nodding your head, you pushed yourself up into a sitting position and stretched, ready to make room for Changbin to scoot in beside you. “Jaemin saw that I was hurting and he said I could go home… Oh… Shit, I have to text him to thank him.” You muttered, pulling your phone out and unlocking it, so focused on sending out the text that you didn’t even hear Changbins sigh of annoyance. “Did you want to order something to eat and watch a movie or something?” You asked after sending out the text, placing your phone down on the coffee table and scooting over.

“Why don’t you just ask Jaemin to come over and watch the movie with you.” Changbin mumbled, eyeing the spot that you made beside yourself for him to sit in before dropping down into the recliner behind him. “He can even take you out to a fancy dinner or something.” The thumping in your head was slowly returning, accompanied by the pounding of your heart that you could hear in your ears, although you weren’t sure if it was racing because you were upset or because you were angry.

Changbin had never made such accusations before, and while he hadn’t flat out accused you of such a thing, you could read into his words and his tone and you knew exactly what he meant. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re just being ridiculous.” You muttered, deciding to stretch out on the couch once more since he was being that way. “Do you want to order dinner or not?” You asked, not even bothering to open your eyes as you asked the question.

“I don’t know, maybe we should ask Jaemin what he wants just in case he comes over to check on you.” Changbin snidely retorted and your eyes rolled behind your eyelids as you let out a small huff of air through your nose. “Or maybe… maybe I should just go back to the dorms and you and Jaemin can enjoy a nice little dinner in my house watching my TV.” He sounded so cocky and truthfully it was disgusting, and it made your head hurt worse.

“I’d argue with you, I’d give you that satisfaction if my head wasn’t already pounding… But you knew that when you came in and you continue to bicker. So maybe you should leave, or maybe I should leave. Clearly you’ve got some shit going on, and truthfully, I can’t fucking handle it right now.” You snapped, taking a deep breath and sinking deeper into the cushions of the sofa, waiting to hear the sound of the recliner moving back into place when Changbin got up, but it was silent. Was he just going to sit there and continue the foolish argument until your head felt like it was going to explode?

The short answer… Yes. Yes he would. “If I leave you’ll just have him come over… And if you leave, you’ll just run to him. Either way you and him are getting exactly what you want, right? Why string me along if he’s so much better? Huh?” You honestly didn’t know where this was coming from, but the more he assumed, the angrier you got.

“You know what? It’s fucking bullshit that you come in here, pretending to give a shit about me, saying shit like… like people at my work should be more understanding of what I go through… And then when there’s one fucking employee who does notice, who does understand, you jump to these batshit insane conclusions that couldn’t be further from the truth. Nothing will make you happy! My head hurts enough already, and then trying to think of ways to fucking please you only makes it hurt worse. So if you’re going to just keep coming at me, I’d rather you not… Or at least wait until I can take another ibuprofen and my headache clears up enough to handle more of your bullshit.” You snapped, your voice cracking as your throat closed up. You were on the verge of tears, although it wasn’t from being upset, it was from being angry and in pain and you just wanted to sleep it all away.

“You know what, I’ll just go.” Changbins hands flew up in the air before slapping down against his lap as he pushed himself up to his feet. “Make sure Jaemin takes his shoes off before he walks on my carpet though.” He always had to have that last word, the last jab of the knife. If you had the energy, you would have flipped him off, but you were just exhausted. You didn’t have the energy to fight, you didn’t even want to fight, he had started it. It wasn’t until you heard the front door slam shut that you finally let yourself cry, but even that was tiresome, and you ended up just crying yourself to sleep.

You weren’t quite sure how much time had passed, but you were happy to see that the sun had finally set, unless it was in the wee hours of the morning and it was just about to rise. That happiness quickly died when you remembered what had happened right before you fell asleep, the sudden lonely feeling and the feeling of emptiness shrouding you like a cloak as you looked around the empty apartment.

At the moment, it didn’t matter though. You knew that he was okay, he was probably at the dorms with the guys having a great time to get his mind off of what he thought was going on. Meanwhile, you still hadn’t eaten and your stomach was now growling at you to feed it. You could get through the rest of the night without him, maybe it was for the best if you both had some distance from each other as much as you hated it.

You thought you’d be okay, you were okay, you had made it to the kitchen, you had gotten the food out of the fridge, you had managed to even start preparing it, but then, as if from out of the dark, it kicked in again. This time it was worse, or maybe it just felt worse because everything else that was going on. It truly felt like your head had been slammed into a brick wall and your vision became blurry and you felt sick and everything was just awful and you couldn’t help but cry as you dropped down to the kitchen floor, your knees curling against your chest, your hand fumbling for your phone in your pocket as you called the only person you knew could help.

“Look, I said that I’d leave. You said you wanted space. I don’t want to argue, I think we should just talk about this-”

“B-Binnie…” You whimpered, sniffling loudly as your body trembled, trying not to throw up, trying so hard to not focus on the pain, but trying not to focus only made it hurt worse. His end was quiet though, aside from the distant murmuring of some of the guys, although you couldn’t make it out, especially considering you were breathing so heavily from crying, the only thing you could really hear was your own whimpers and sobs. “Please come home…”

The sound of a car door, and then the revving of an engine. “I’m coming, sweetheart, just stay where you’re at. Where are you right now? What were you doing?” It was the Binnie that you knew and loved speaking right now, but it was so different from the Changbin that had sat across from you in the living room just a little while ago. Right now you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, you simply needed him there with you, his voice soft and sweet as he talked you through the pain.

“Kitchen… I… I was hungry…” You stammered, and then you hiccuped, the sudden jolt seemingly shifting your stomach and causing you to retch. “S-Sorry…” You whispered, and you heard Changbin sigh softly, although you weren’t sure if it sounded that way because he pulled his phone away or if he was just trying to be quiet because he knew what was going on.

“I’ll be home shortly, and then I’ll order us something to eat. You remember what we talked about the last time this happened and I wasn’t there? You remember what I told you to do?” He was trying his best to keep your mind off of the ache, and it was working in a way, your mind now trying to clear the fog to think about what you’d do if this happened while he was on tour. He’d sit on the phone with you for hours, and if he was in the middle of a show while it happened, he had set up his voicemail just for you so you could listen to his voice to help you a little bit until he could call you back. “Just listen to me talk and…-”

“And take deep breaths…” You sputtered out, your breaths coming a little bit too quickly right now which wasn’t helping in the nausea department. “Count to ten…” You continued, squeezing your eyes shut as tightly as you could as you tried to visualize the numbers popping up in your head while listening to him talk. He wasn’t really talking about anything in particular, his voice was just something for you to focus on, something to calm you in a way.

It wasn’t long… or maybe it was… until Changbin came walking through the front door. The entire apartment was pitch black, but he knew that flicking on any lights would only make things worse, so he used his phone screen to shine a light across the floor until he made it to the kitchen where you were still sitting curled up against the cabinets. “Did you take your medicine today?” He asked as he squatted down on the floor next to you, his hand wiping the beads of sweat from your forehead that you didn’t even notice had built up.

Your medicine, which you often forgot to take, especially when you were in a hurry, had just now crossed your mind now that Changbin had brought it up. “No…” You mumbled sheepishly, and he tsked his tongue, but he wasn’t going to say anything about it right now. Instead, he helped you to your feet, but once you were on them, he gently lifted you up, carrying you to the bedroom and then carefully laying you down.

“I don’t want you to take it now… You have to take it in the morning…” He whispered, and although the room was dark, you could tell he wasn’t looking at you because you couldn’t see the moon reflected in the whites of his eyes. “I’m sorry… For the way I acted. It was uncalled for, and I got jealous… Stupidly jealous. I just… I don’t like the idea of another guy taking care of you. It kind of pisses me off…”

“Kind of?” You questioned, and you would have laughed if the situation didn’t feel so serious. “You walked out on me… That hurt, Binnie…” You softly explained as shortly as possible. “I’d like to think that I make it perfectly clear that I love you… Only you… You’re the only person I want to take care of me…” You reached out in the darkness, your hand brushing along his back where you could feel the outline of his muscles that you mapped with your fingertips.

“You do… You do.” He repeated himself, running his hands over his face, and you felt him shiver slightly from your touch. “I know you love me… I know you feel that way… I just… I want to be the only person that takes care of you, the only person who looks out for you. Sometimes I feel like… Like since I’m gone so much… You’ll find someone else to take care of you like I should.”

“Bin…” You sighed out his name, pushing yourself up onto your knees and draping your arms over his shoulders, burying your face in the crook of his neck and placing light kisses against his skin. “I don’t want anyone else to take care of me… You’re the only person that can calm me, that can soothe me. You’re the only one that can ever make me feel better. I don’t want anyone but you.” His silence let you know that he was thinking, and you didn’t want him thinking anything bad, so you pulled him to lay down, laying on top of him to trap him-although you knew he could move you if he wanted to-and pulling the blanket up around the both of you.

“I’ll do better… I’ll be better…” He whispered, his fingers dancing along the small of your back. “I’m sorry I upset you… I’m so sorry, sweetheart…” He apologized again, placing a kiss to the top of your head before settling into his pillow again. “I’m not leaving again, I’ll stay right here with you, forever and ever.”

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writemekpop · 1 year ago

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Never Say Never | Na Jaemin

Summary: You know that going back to your ex-boyfriend Jaemin’s place is a bad idea – but you do it anyway.

Genre: Exes to lovers AU, angsty

Word Count: 1.1k

@nctsworld

You were reaching for the last tub of ice cream at the supermarket when your hand touched someone else’s.

It was Jaemin.

“Y/n! You look… good,” Jaemin said, his eyes not leaving yours. He placed the ice cream in your basket. “You have it.”

Jaemin had been the love of your life. A month ago, you had to break up with him, because you wanted to get married, and he didn’t. It had been the hardest month of your life.

It was a small consolation that Jaemin looked as broken as you felt.

“Would you like to come to mine for a cup of coffee?” he asked.

“I don’t think that’s the best idea…” you started.

If you let yourself get close to him again, how would you ever be able to leave?

“It’s just coffee – not marriage,” he joked. Then he saw your face. “Too soon?”

---

Jaemin took you back to his apartment. To your surprise, Jaemin had kept everything the same – he even left the picture of you two kissing in Disneyland in the hallway.

“You know what’s better than coffee? A glass of wine.” he said, his eyes twinkling with equal parts of mischief and pain.

You knew this wasn’t healthy, but you couldn’t resist. “Alright. But just one.”

You ended up having four glasses of wine, as well as sitting on Jaemin’s couch chatting until 2AM.

Jaemin’s dark eyes glistened with pain. His irises flashed with the colours from the movie that was playing.

Halfway through the movie, he shifted closer to you on the couch, so that your thighs were touching.

“We’re friends,” Jaemin said, his eyes crinkling. “Friends kiss sometimes, don’t they?”

You knew this was a bad idea. A month ago, you were planning your beach wedding with Jaemin in Bali, the house you would live in, the names of your two children (Jordan and Maya).

Every morning you still woke up expecting to find Jaemin next to you.

Your heart was confused enough as it is – and a kiss would only make things worse.

But all you could focus on was the look on Jaemin’s face. Jaemin would never insist on kissing you. He would just look at you like you were the only thing worth looking at in the world, and wait for you to make the move.

You nodded, heart fluttering.

Jaemin’s lips met yours and you kissed slowly, insistently, as if both of you were memorising the taste of each other.

Jaemin’s hand rested on your waist. “You know what’s better than being friends? Being friends with benefits. We could sleep together… just once…”

Surrounded by Jaemin’s warm smell, and the feel of his hands on you, you were dying to say yes. It would be so easy, slotting into place like you were made for each other.

You almost lost your self control… then you pushed Jaemin away.

“No, no, no! We can’t do this,” you cried.

“Can’t we?” Jaemin asked, but you could tell from his sad smile that he knew he’d lost.

“Getting over you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do,” you said. “I can’t – make it any harder.”

Running to the cupboard, you pulled out a pink pillowcase. “Wait-“ you said, before Jaemin could protest, and put it on his head.

“There,” you said “If you want to talk, we can talk. But you have to keep that on. It’s the only safe way.”

Jaemin put his hands on his hips. “Okay. But I warn you… you might fall for me again. Pink is my colour.”

You chuckled.

You and Jaemin talked till the early hours of the morning, reminiscing about the time you were so hungry to rip each other’s clothes off that you did it in the haunted house at Lotte World, only to be discovered by a group of terrified teens.

“Do you… think about me, at all?” you asked shyly.

Jaemin didn’t say anything.

Your heart sank. “It’s fine, I didn’t think so…”

Jaemin took your hand. “I nodded! Under the pillowcase! I think about you every waking hour, Y/n. I thought that was obvious.”

“Ah…” you said. “I couldn’t see you nodding.”

“Do you think,” Jaemin said, “- and you can call me ridiculous, but – do you think it would be best if I took this pillowcase off?”

“Yeah,” you said, laughing a little.

Seeing Jaemin’s handsome face made you ache all over again – in good and bad ways.

You stared at each other for a long moment.

Then Jaemin leaned in, twined his fingers in your hair and kissed you. This time, his kiss was not slow or gentle. It burned with all the wound-up energy of your month spent apart.

You pushed Jaemin so he was lying down on the couch beneath you. As you unbuttoned his shirt, you were determined to memorise the smooth planes of his chest, because this was the last time you would see them.

A glass of wine got knocked off the arm of the couch, spilling wine all over Jaemin.

“Damn it,” Jaemin said, trying to get up, but you stopped him. Instead, you leaned down and placed slow, wet kisses all over Jaemin’s chest, licking up the spilt wine.

That night was amazing. You rode Jaemin desperately, because you remembered the loneliness of the past months and because you were so aware of the loneliness to come.

When you woke up the next morning and found that you really were nestled on Jaemin’s chest, the rush of relief was dizzying.

“I’ll do it,” Jaemin suddenly said.

You twisted to face him. Your stomach flipped.

“You’ll do what?”

“I’ll marry you.” Jaemin said. “I’ll do the vows, the cake, the big party… I’d take your name if you wanted me to.” He gazed urgently at you. “I just can’t… lose you again, Y/n.”

Your heart was racing. Even now, you couldn’t believe the words coming out of Jaemin’s mouth. You were sure that, any second, he would turn around and say it was a joke, or he didn’t mean it.

“You would?” you said. Tears pricked your eyes. “We can do it in the registry office, half an hour, we don’t even have to invite anyone if you don’t want to.” Tears flowed freely down your face now. “Oh, Jaemin.”

Jaemin held you tight in his arms, and you knew he was thinking, I will never let you go.

“I do have one condition, though,” you said, smiling up at him through your tears.

“Anything,” Jaemin said.

“Are you really willing to take my last name? Become Mr. L/n?”

Jaemin smiled. “It would be my pleasure.”

—

MASTERLIST

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majestichyuk · 1 year ago

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Second Try

Pairing :- Johnny x fem!reader

Summary:- All she wanted was a good first date, and the least the other party could have done so well, was be there.

Genre:- fluff, kinda angsty, strangers to friends (can be something more if you use ur imagination ;)

Wc :- 1.6k

WARNING ⚠️:- NONE

NOTES: - it may be a little cringy or rushed idk, but it probably is lol. This is my first fic so critique is always accepted, I can improve. Wanted to write something and this was the idea, something cute. Anyway, hope you like it. Don’t be afraid to interact. 🙂 LIKE, FOLLOW & REBLOG.

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The light breeze blew against the rainy night, delicate drops of rain damping the side of my shoulder uncovered from the tiny umbrella. Nervousness is an understatement for how I'm feeling, I haven't been out as much and don’t put much energy into seeking a companion.

Today is different from my normal routine, other than going home from a long day of work to relax and prepare my dinner for the night I went into my closet and dug out all the repeated fits I’ve worn. Finally, I set my palm on a nicely wrapped box with a bow on it given to me by my mother who recently transitioned into an angel. She told me to wear it on a special occasion, the day I think will change my life, and today felt like that day.

I met the guy after my shift was done from work, he stopped me on my way home to ask for directions to a certain place. I don’t normally do this, but he felt like he could bring happiness to my dull life, we talked every day after that, but he wasn’t the best at conversations, he mostly talked about himself but It’s okay cause it’s better than being alone.

I don’t own a car yet, so I caught the bus on my way there. We agreed to meet at a peaceful little restaurant called ANL Cafe that recently opened. I've never been there so I was excited when he suggested it.

Wrapping the dainty jacket around me tightly I came out of the bus and walked towards the Cafe. The rain started to pour down a little more, so I quickened my step and eventually entered the warm environment. Shaking the water from out the umbrella I closed it and placed it in the provided bucket inside the cafe.

I saw an empty seat close to the window wall. I took my jacket off and placed it on the back of the seat. Before I sat, I looked around to see if I saw him but ended up with no luck.

“Maybe I came too early,” I said, a little unsure if that was the case. I checked my phone to look back at the conversation we had on the time we should meet here, and I was exactly on time.

I brushed it off and waited, there’s nothing wrong with being a few minutes late.

“Hello there, and welcome to ANL Cafe! What can I get for you today?” an overexcited employee greeted me with such enthusiasm, that I found it cute.

"Hi, I'm actually waiting on someone, but a glass of water would be nice," I assured him as I gave a polite smile, which he quickly returned.

"A glass of water, coming right up!" He winked at me with a cheeky smile and left to return a minute later with the glass in hand.

"Here you are, ANL's finest tapped water," he laughed at his joke, and I couldn't muster up the strength to not laugh as well.

"Thank You..." I looked at his name tag. "Jaemin?" I asked curiously.

"Yes, that is correct, is there anything else I could get for you?" Jaemin politely asked but I shook my head, so he bowed and walked away.

15 minutes passed and I still don't see any signs of him showing up after calling and messaging him a couple of times with no response. I wasn't overly excited about moving to the next stage of our relationship, but I assumed that If I gave it a try, I wouldn't regret it, but the more I sat here and thought about it the more disappointed I became with myself.

There wasn't much of a spark between us, but I settled for it because he wasn't a bad guy, he was quite respectful and sweet but if I'm being honest, he's a 20% type of guy, a choice made in the moment, an open opportunity taken.

Many would have gotten up and left after probably 10 minutes but after the half an hour mark hit, I decided to order my food and treat myself. I exchange words with Jaemin here and there, he's sweet and he also told me he's working for his older brother because he looks up to him and I thought that was quite admirable.

After I paid for my meal, I left the cafe and surprisingly the rain was still falling. I took up my umbrella, put on my jacket, and headed back outside.

I found a nearby bus stand and the seat was shockingly dry. I sat down and waited for the bus to arrive.

I see a figure at the corner of my eye as they sit beside me but not too close. I kept my head straight, not daring to look in their direction.

"It's raining quite a lot, isn't it?" The gentleman beside me asked in such a soothing and deep tone.

"Yea...I guess" I replied quite uneased, wondering why he was trying to start a conversation with me.

I looked at my side to see he braced his head on the headrest, looking up at the bus stop roofing, with a hat and umbrella in his left and right hand.

"Would be nice to be at home right now cuddled up in my bedsheet with this weather, you know?" He turned his head to look at me with a look in his eyes that had me more intrigued than I actually wanted to be.

"You're not wrong," I scoffed "I'd rather be there more than anything right now,".

"So why aren't you there?" He asked me and seemed more interested then as he turned his body towards me.

"If you don't mind me asking, that is," he reassured me so that I wouldn't feel pressured, but I brushed it off.

"It's fine really, I was actually supposed to be on a date with a guy I have been talking to for 3 weeks now, but he stood me up, so I had my dinner and left," I laughed a little when I saw the concerned expression on his face.

"Don't pity me, I'm okay, really, I'm actually happy he didn't show up," I looked up at the bright stars peeking through the dark clouds of the rainy night. He did the same and relaxed in the seat.

Silence took over us as the windy breeze passed by.

"I'm Johnny by the way," he put his hand out for me to shake.

I looked at him and realized how beautiful he was, I shook his hand and felt something between my fingers.

"I actually saw you at the cafe and you left this on the table" He chuckled lightly. I looked in my hand to see my bracelet that I had the habit of playing with and sometimes taking it off when I’m eating.

"And here I thought you wanted to be friends," I playfully pouted.

"Well, I had to make sure you were worthy of receiving back such a valuable item," he said in a snarky tone.

"So, you were going to steal my shit?!" I smacked his arm. "I would have definitely done some investigation work and jumped you if I saw you in the street," I smirk and place my bracelet back on my wrist.

"Oh?" Johnny opened his hand towards me. "Give me it back and let's see how good of a tracker you are," he said in a challenging manner inching his hands closer.

I thought about it reluctantly, I don't know why a decision like this has to have a second guess, the first obvious choice would be to laugh it off and decline but he's quite interesting and had a weird cozy aura around him. So, I placed the bracelet in his palm and looked him deep in the eyes and he held the gaze with such confidence.

I removed my hands and placed them to my side, resting them on the seat. Johnny put the bracelet on and chuckled lightly.

"I like this game," he pushed his hair back and placed his hat back on. "A game of cat and mouse?" he tilted his head towards you as he asked curiously.

"More or less, you make me want to step out of my comfort zone," I wiped my face with my handkerchief as the wind blew the rain toward me.

"So, you felt the connection too? well ever since you stepped into my Cafe, I was intrigued by you actually," He crossed his arm over his chest and as I looked towards him, I realized he was gently gazing at me awaiting my response, but I looked at him confused.

"You own ANL Cafe?" He laughed and nodded his head. "So, you're Jaemin's older brother I assume?".

"I guess you'd have to go to the cafe with me and find out over a better meal that's actually paid for," he said in a flirty tone that made me break into a smile.

I laughed and looked at the road to see a bus arriving and quickly stood up.

"Oh, what a shame, the damsel has to leave to return to her exciting life of wonderful joy, happiness, sunshine, and prosperity," I dramatically placed the back of my hand over my eyes. Johnny burst out in laughter at my unexpected action.

"Well, I guess this bracelet is your diamond slipper," he looked up at you with starry eyes. "I never caught your name," he stood up and gently touched my elbow.

"Maybe I'll tell you If we happen to see each other again," I looked up at him, he was tall and even more gorgeous up close as the moonlight shaped his features.

The bus stopped in front of us. "Next time, Johnny?" I asked, waiting for his reply before I stepped into the bus.

"2 is my lucky number, so I'll make sure our second meeting leads to me getting your name and giving you your bracelet back in exchange for a continuous friendship," Johnny smiled brightly as we waved goodbye.

#nct x reader #nct imagines #nct 127 #nct #nct dream #kpop fanfic #nct johnny #nct 127 johnny #johnny suh #nct jaemin #nct icons #nct smut #first fic #jaemin na #na jaemin #suh johnny #kpop bg #kpop #nct 127 smut

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fullsunrise · 1 year ago

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Delicate - Chapter 1

Sometimes I wonder; when you sleep are you ever dreaming of me?

Word count: 1.2k

Warnings: Mention of alcohol, themes of abuse, mention of nausea (if you feel uncomfortable with these themes, please don't read!)

A/N: Finally here's the first chapter! Hope y'all enjoy pure angsty Haechan

Read Chapter 2 here (x)

Despite the crisp autumn air outside, the air inside the nightclub was humid and thick. The strobe lights beamed through a layer of haze as the music and liquor pulsed through his veins. Haechan felt every beat in his chest as it spread throughout his body. With each drop of sweat, his worries from the day were pushed further and further away into the depths of his mind.

This had been a typical Friday night for Haechan since his twenty-first birthday. It had only been four months since the warm days of June, but he already felt like the days of shitty basement parties were long gone. No more puke-stained bathrooms, terrible music, and cheap liquor. Although the clubs he went to were only a step above those moldy basements, it was still better. Clubbing had given him the opportunity to let loose without worrying about running into every person he knew. He could drift away into a sea of strangers, letting his body become a part of the swaying crowd. The booming music and eye candy were a bonus.

Some nights he would go alone, but most of the time the usual suspects that tagged along were his roommates Jaemin and Jeno. After a few months of going to the same clubs, their nightly routine was nearly perfected. Jaemin would get a round of shots for everyone and then instantly regret ordering tequila, Jeno would leave the bar in search of a one-night stand, and Haechan would make a beeline straight to the dance floor.

While his roommates were occupied, Haechan’s eyes scanned the smoky, packed room. He quickly found that the short dresses and skirts didn't impress him. Bored with the selection on the dance floor, he let his gaze drift away towards the upstairs balcony. Through the thick atmosphere, he could barely make out two figures leaning against the railing. Their bodies were close together, with one silhouette towering over the other. At first glance, it looked like a cozy couple ready to leave. Normally Haechan wouldn't bother giving his full attention to some random couple at the club, but his curiosity got the better of him. He knew that his wandering eye would only get him in trouble, but what was the harm?

In his buzzed state, Haechan could've sworn he saw the larger silhouette grab a woman’s wrists in a tight grip. The woman seemed to struggle, trying to break free from his embrace. A lover's quarrel, Haechan thought to himself. He almost felt guilty for watching, knowing fully well he should be minding his own business. He observed for a bit longer, but once they began cuddling Haechan could feel his interest slip away. The show was over and it was time for him to continue his survey of the crowd around him.

There were too many couples. And way too many sloppy dancers. His prowl was leading him nowhere, and he was ready to give up. There was always another night, he pondered. Just because he couldn't find a dance partner didn't mean it was an unsuccessful night.

As Haechan started to push his way through the crowd back to the bar, the timing couldn't have been more perfect as a new song began. Sidetracked by the deep bass, it was easy for him to get lost in the rhythm. His eyes slowly closed as he felt a pair of hands wrap around his neck. The light pressure from the stranger’s back comforted him as he glided his hands over her hips. Haechan tried so hard to concentrate on the sensations of her motions, but his composure faltered when the sudden feeling of being watched washed over him.

His eyes were open in an instant, desperately searching the crowd. At first he couldn't locate the source of such intensity, but when his glance flickered upwards he saw her right away. It was the woman he saw on the balcony, staring right at him with a glistening stare. When the strobe light hit her in the right angle, he could see now that she was in a tight black mini dress. Her eyes shimmered in the light, but he couldn't tell if it was her dark, glittery makeup or tears.

He was instantly entranced by her and he couldn't look away even if he tried. Her eyes were piercing into his as if they were begging him to enter her world. He could get lost in them, he thought. Just as he declared to himself she would be the one for tonight, he felt the woman in his arms drift away. His trance was shattered just as quickly as it was built when he focused on the woman in front of him. Before he could see her face, her back was already turned around to continue dancing with her friend. As he brushed off the interaction, he once more set his eyes to the balcony in hopes of sealing his fate.

To his disappointment, the spot on the balcony was now empty. His eyes rapidly darted to all corners of the club in search of the woman in the black dress but she was nowhere to be found. Although he didn't want to give up just yet, he could tell the night was getting late. He pulled out his phone from his pocket to check the time, and a bright 1:30am glared back at him. There were also multiple texts and missed calls from Jeno, demanding Haechan to help Jeno out because Jaemin was "trashed beyond belief".

Maybe that couple went home after all, he mused. That didn't stop him from fantasizing about what she must've looked like up close. What would she feel like under his touch? What would her voice sound like? What would she have smelled like? Would it have been sweet, like wildflowers? Or warm and inviting like vanilla? Sultry like cigarettes and whiskey?

Haechan shook those thoughts from his head. Why was he so caught up on her? It's not like she was the most attractive woman he's ever seen. Then why was she clouding his head like a thick smoke?

Maybe she was a ghost. He laughed at the thought as he stepped into the front seat of a taxi. A disgruntled Jeno and a passed out Jaemin were in the back seat. Haechan thought he must've gone mad. A ghost wasn't entirely out of the question. Maybe it was better if he pretended she was a ghost, that way he wouldn't have felt guilty witnessing her lover’s tight grip on her wrists. No matter how hard he tried to ignore it, his heart stung. In his head he made his way to her and whisked her away. But instead Jeno pushed him through the club doors, and Haechan wasn't strong enough to stand his ground.

It was impossible to shake the image of her as he threw his body on the tangled sheets. As Haechan closed his eyes, the room began to spin from underneath him. The nausea hit almost immediately, and he cursed at himself. Fighting the urge to run to the toilet, he reached for something in his mind to keep him tethered to his bed. All he could find was the girl from the balcony, as she stood front of him with her deep, smoky stare. He tried to grab onto her face, but his impaired mind weaved in and out consciousness before he could reach her.

#nct 127 #nct dream #nct fanfic #haechan #haechan fanfic #nct #nct dream fanfic #lee haechan #nct 127 fanfic

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fullsunised · 2 years ago

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LOVE, THE SERIES : CHAPTER TWO

the stars smile at us

╰─▸ ❝ @ overworked!idol! mark lee x gn!overworked!idol! reader

→ requests open

→ trigger warnings: angsty? sad? I tried to make it sad idk if it worked, happy ending though :)

→ a/n: I thought jaemin would be part two but guess not, also thank you for 50 followers 🔫

last piece

you always thought you were lonely, empty even- the only time you felt alive was when you were surrounded by your fans, or your closest of friends, which was technically almost half of the industry. being around people energised you. it was a good thing really, until you were left alone because everyone else was busy running in their own lives.

being alone was something you dreaded. as someone who has been in this profession for more than three years, you liked to believe you've seen it all. smiles, tears, screams, pain, health, hate, love- every thing there ever was. in fact, you experienced it all first hand. all the memories, you've only ever wanted to hide came flooding back to you every time you were given a headspace.

which is why you kept yourself busy. almost- definitely overworked yourself over the years. exhaustion was bound to come chase up to you at some point, so you promised yourself to work hard until then and along the journey, you've met him.

it was like seeing a mirror, but also finding yourself in an alternate universe. you were alike but not so in a lot of aspects. a smile traced your face as soon as you heard the door ruffle open. as you stared at the stars, he slipped next to you, into the comfy abode you created for just the two of you, for moments like this.

"has it been five months?"

he whispered his eyes turning to the stars. you hummed playing with the hem of the comforter that covered you both from the cold. it really has been that long since you saw each other, in true comfort. every time you made eye contact at shows, just a nod and a smile was exchanged- because both of you were busy running.

running to sing, dance, perform, write- what not. you've been so caught up with everything that filled your schedules that you had no time to see each other. calls were exchanged but a question still lingered in your head.......were you even dating anymore?

it seemed like his head was filled too. with the same, and many other questions. none of you broke the silence though, it's been too long since you've had some peace to yourself. leaning back onto the wall, you rested your head on his shoulder's, your fingers finding his warmth.

all this felt surreal. both of you had to run back to your work tomorrow but right now, you just wished time paused, even just for a minute to let you breathe. mark sighed into your hair, leaving a kiss on the top of your head. when he pulled away, you looked up into his eyes, before kissing his cheek.

"namjoon would've hit me, if I didn't see you", you joked hoping to ease the heavy atmosphere. mark chuckled appreciating your attempt to make it less awkward. silence again. you have too much to say, to much to talk about but it was a crime to break the delicate atmosphere.

you knew you had to ask him. where do you really stand? your heart hurt- you loved him with everything you have, and if that wasn't enough to keep you together, maybe the idea of love wasn't for you.

he cleared his throat, and you knew it was coming. wrapping yourself tighter around his arms you waited. it's better to end it than suffer right? a long sigh left his lips. but instead of an hour long paragraph on how it is not working anymore- three simple words left his lips.

the three words, that bought you to tears.

"I love you"

you looked up at him, your eyes glossy, "you do?". it was question- or maybe a reassurance you wanted for yourself because why? after how little time you two could give each other? after how many days you couldn't contact him?

mark nodded, as if that was the only thing he was sure of in his messy little life. he loved his profession, but he loved you too, more than he imagined- his heart making a promise to find a balance, between what he loved the most. you let the tears slip, a soft smile gracing your face.

he carefully wiped your tears, and took you onto his lap. you gave him the widest smile you had given anyone in the past few months, all the drained energy coming back to you as you cupped his cheeks. without wasting a minute, he pulled you into a long kiss- a kiss that was full of love, adoration and reassurance.

he was going to be with you- you wouldn't have to be alone anymore.

while he was staring at the stars, through your moonlit eyes, he realised they were smiling at you.

fullsunised.

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aehyei · 2 years ago

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PERFECT VS. YOU? IT’S ALWAYS BEEN YOU. day five in 31 days and nights with na jaemin.

📌 PURE FLOOF !!

pairing: boyfriend!njm x reader, genre: fluff, established relationship!au, angsty

TAG LIST FOR THE SERIES: @bubblegumjeon @dayandnighthyuck @airpodbaekuwu @sunshine-skz @jaeymark @luvrboyjeno @sunshinedhyuck @thiccfullsun @baehaechannie @champagne-n-yachts @bitchenderyy + if you want to be included, please reply on the original post!

“I’VE GOT THE BIGGEST DISCOVERY. DON’T YOU KNOW WINNIE THE POOH’S ACTUALLY A GIRL? ALL MY CHILDHOOD SHITTY LIFE, I THOUGHT SHE WAS A MAN. DAMN IT.” You continued to speak but stopped when you noticed Jaemin was too busy on his computer. A huge frown escaped you. “Jaem?”

“Hm?” He hummed, his eyes still never leaving the screen. For the past hours, you’ve been talking and talking and he’s been editing one single picture. You know he always takes his projects in Uni seriously, but normally, he always made you his first priority.

“Is there…something wrong?”

Jaemin stopped clicking on his mouse, tilting his head a little but still not facing you. “Hey, uh, babe, remember the days we first met?”

“Of course I did. How could I ever forget those years? You and the boys are the best things that happen to me, but don’t tell them. I really hate it when they tease the hell out of me.” You rambled on, having the habit of being a little talkative sometimes. Especially when you’re in a good mood. But something’s telling you Jaemin wasn’t enjoying the day like you do.

“Remember when you had a huge crush on Haechan?”

Now you were sure something was wrong. The crush Jaemin was speaking about happened three years ago, back when you first moved to South Korea. “Uh…yeah, I think so? It wasn’t a serious crush. Haechan was cute and really funny, and I was a dumb kid.”

Jaemin finally turned his chair to face you. He cleared his throat and threaded his fingers together with his lap. “Didn’t you also have a crush on Jeno after Haechan?”

“Again, I was dumb.” You repeated. “I wouldn't call them a crush. I just admired the boys. They were talented and stuff. Besides, all that mattered to me is the dorky kid who “accidentally” spilled his, mind you, extremely hot coffee on my white uniform.”

Jaemin couldn’t help but laugh at the memory. He remembered it very well, as if it all happened just yesterday. Ever since Jisung introduced you to him and the boys, he always had these weird butterflies swarming deep in his stomach. He had the urge to always impress you, even if he mostly failed.

“Hey! I couldn’t help it. Your beauty blinded me.” He huffs, his heart fluttering at your choice of words. Finally, you smiled when you saw him loosen up. “Oh? So, are you confessing to me? Sorry, I have the most amazing boyfriend back at home and he easily gets jealous.”

Jaemin's smile widens as he jerks up from his seat, wrapping his arms around your smaller figure, causing the two of you to fall on a small bed. “God, you’re the best.” You ran your fingers through his hair, pressing your lips on his head when he snuggled on your chest. “Says you, Na.”

“I love you.” He pouts, resting his chin by your chest so he could get lost in your eyes.

“I love you too.” You reply sweetly, sighing in full content by his warmth.

You always make him feel better in every way, even if he didn’t tell you what was going on. That was one of the reasons why he falls deeper in love with you everyday.

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pwarkluv · 4 years ago

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❝ idk you yet ❞ - p.js

park jisung x reader | angsty, fluff | 1.6k words

WARNINGS | TW: mentions blood, abuse, drug and alcohol abuse, smoking, lowercase au, non-idol au, high school au, badboy!jisung, mature language/cursing, reader is like an angel sent from heaven for him, jisungie just in need of love :(

SUMMARY | being an outcast has him wondering if he’ll ever be happy. cue you, the new girl, stumbling into his life (literally).

AUTHOR’S NOTE | inspired by the song “idk you yet” by alexander23! also AHHH this is my 100 followers special fic :) THANK U LOVES FOR 100 IM SO SHOCKED CJSBFKEJD <33 the writing is a little crappy because i’m currently on my period and my patience for sitting down and writing this went down halfway through lol but I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, ENJOY THIS JISUNG FIC BC JISUNG MY BABIE AND SO ARE YOU GUYS!

whenever anybody thinks of park jisung, they think of the chains and dark clothing he wears. they think about the faint smell of smoke and men’s cologne that follows him wherever he goes.

they think of the boy who grew up on the wrong side of the tracks.

but what they don’t think about are bruises on his face he fails to hide whenever he walks into school, the dejected look on his face whenever random people give him disapproving looks, the way his smile slowly faded into a permanent frown wherever he went.

jisung quickly accepted his reputation at school and in their little town, not having enough energy to feel insecure about it like before.

the only group of people that even remotely cared about the boy were his best friends in the whole entire world, nct dream.

they were outcasts just like him, the most “fucked up group of boys” in their town (the people’s words, not theirs).

see, they were your typical bad boy group straight out of your typical fanfic. bad grades, smoking in their free time, getting into fights, always being late to class; not a single person had hope in them.

but behind their scary and intimidating facade, all seven boys were big softies with misunderstood hearts and difficult backgrounds.

people were just too dense to look into it, only judging them based on their looks and personality on the outside.

❝ how can you miss someone you’ve never met ❞

love was a foreign thing to jisung, the only form of love he’s ever felt being from his friends. his parents were… interesting to say the least.

jisung’s father was a hard-core alcoholic, his mother being a major druggie. with no siblings in the house, jisung was usually their main target to push around and beat up.

and so because of this at a young age jisung learned to distance himself from other people and found different ways to release stress.

he started smoking when he was 14, the warm and hazy feeling of the smoke entering his lungs comforting him.

if jisung humored himself enough, maybe smoking could count as his first love. it was always there for him, never leaving him alone even if he wanted to quit.

he relied on it knowing it was the only constant in his life.

now of course the boy has heard of proper love, love like in the movies or shitty romance songs he hears on the radio.

and he won’t lie, there were moments he thought about what it felt like to be in love. but he knew that would never happen, at least not in their small town anyways.

he just wanted to be loved.

jisung would never admit it but sometimes he’d be jealous of the old couples walking down the street in their own world like it was just them two against the universe. he was jealous of the happy kids running around, their mother’s and father’s fondly smiling at their child. he was jealous of all the “normal” kids in his neighborhood.

jisung wanted that, craved that.

but most importantly, the boy wanted love.

❝ cause i need you now but i don’t know you yet ❞

everything hurt.

his head, his body, his mind, his heart; everything was in pain.

jisung walked down the empty streets of their city, a trail of blood following behind him as he accepted his fate. the boy was 99% sure he had a concussion and at the very least had a few broken ribs.

he felt like this was the end, and he was ready.

wandering aimlessly around town, you decided to take a late night walk to familiarize yourself around the area. you had just moved into the city a week ago, spending all seven days trying to help your family unpack and rearrange your cozy new home.

now that you were finally free of the smell of tape and the dust of the boxes, you decided it was best to get to know the place you were living in.

the autumn air seemed to settle at night as you shivered, cursing yourself for not bringing a jacket of some sort. the sight of a convenience store up ahead of you brought you relief as you rummaged through your pockets wondering if you had enough money for ramen.

your steps became excited as you found a couple dollars, fondly thinking about what type of ramen you should buy. you became so lost in your thoughts you didn’t even notice the poor boy who was staggering in front of you, or the trail of blood he left behind.

jisung pushed himself to reach the convenience store a couple feet away from him, in desperate need of supplies to at least try and fix himself.

if it didn’t help in any way then oh well, maybe death was indeed an option.

grinding his teeth though the pain, he did not expect to feel a small body bump into him. had he been at his regular health, jisung would’ve easily been able to keep still but because of how much blood he was losing the boy was knocked down like a bowling pin.

“holy fuck.” jisung cursed the feeling of the concrete floor colliding with his ribs. he didn’t even notice the girl who had bumped into him sitting on the floor dumbfounded, freaking out over his state.

“oh my fucking god.” the girl said, capturing his attention. jisung glared at the stranger, mentally acknowledging the fact she was pretty.

but her being pretty won’t get you anywhere, he scolded himself. she’ll leave you just like everyone else.

“a-are you okay?” she said, eyes glancing at his black eye. jisung rolled his eyes, already annoyed. “does it look like i’m okay?” he replied, his deep voice catching the girl off guard.

“just, fuck off.” jisung said closing his eyes as he laid back down on the floor, knowing he couldn’t force himself to get up anymore. he didn’t even have to open his eyes to know she left, hearing the sound of her footsteps walk away.

the boy sighed as he laid idly on the floor, wondering what sin he committed to lead him to where he is now. not even she wanted to stay, the tears threatening to fall as his thoughts buried him alive.

“why can’t i just die?” jisung said out loud, asking no one but himself.

“because i won’t let you.” a voice replied as jisung forced himself to sit up in confusion. it was the same girl he had bumped into, but this time she had a first aid kit with her. he gave her a lost look despite knowing what she was here to do.

jisung’s mind just couldn’t wrap around the fact that a total stranger would even bother to help him.

“now sit up.” she said softly as she bent down to open the box, the boy slowly followed her instructions. “i’m sorry this might sting.” she said though jisung didn’t mind because she was much prettier up close.

the next ten minutes were you trying to fix his wounds against the shitty chairs outside the convenience store.

jisung didn’t even bother mentioning his broken ribs, not wanting you to freak out. you cleaned up what you could and the boy was beyond grateful for that.

you subconsciously rubbed his back in a comforting way whenever you’d apply alcohol to his open wounds, trying to ease the sting. you held his hand for him to hold and though he was a big boy and had a high pain tolerance, he still gave it a squeeze just to keep your hand there. what the actual fuck is this feeling, jisung asked himself as he watched your determined figure work on him.

it was cold and in order to better work on his wounds, the boy offered to give you his hoodie which strangely had no traces of blood on it. you gladly accepted, the faint smell of blood and his cologne engulfing you up.

the sight of you in something so big and so him made his chest swell in pride.

jisung couldn’t even formulate a sentence as you cursed at the time once you finished patching him up, fleeing the scene before he could say anything with a small smile, his hoodie still on.

❝ and can you find me soon because i’m in my head ❞

the thought of your soft hands on his, your voice, your whole presence; everything about you couldn’t seem to leave the poor boy’s mind. it was now monday, and waiting for his class to start already made him want to go home.

if only i got her name, jisung daydreamed with his head resting on the palm of his hand. the classroom was loud and bright, people occasionally giving him looks but the boy didn’t mind.

“jisungie~ did you hear we have a new kid?” jaemin asked, poking the boy’s cheeks. the boy only gave him a pointed look before sighing.

“hyung i don’t really care.” jisung replied, looking back out the window.

jaemin only gave him an offended look before grumbling a bit. “i don’t know maybe you will.” he muttered under his breath as their teacher walked into the room.

❝ yeah i need you now but i don’t know you yet ❞

their homeroom teacher stood in front of the class, jisung tuning out his voice. the boy once again sighed as his teacher called for their attention, explaining they had a new girl in their class. “now make her feel welcomed,” he said before turning towards the door.

“y/n, please come in.” the teacher said and jisung almost fell out of his seat when he saw you walking through the door with the same smile you gave him a couple days ago.

“hi i’m y/n and i hope we can get along.” you bowed to the class, a familiar hoodie you were wearing catching his attention.

isn’t that mine, jisung thought to himself as he bit back a smile knowing you kept it all along.

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jenosuh · 3 years ago

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fic recs and good authors part 2

so I’m not actually finished here but I guess I’ll just post this now and make a part 3 when some other fics come to mind, I’m sorry if I left out and triggers or warnings. sorry if I’ve tagged you before

tag list : @dimplehyunn

these are all in no particular order

love story by @dreamcities romeo!jaemin x fem!juliet!reader

summary: you hadn’t meant to fall in love at first sight with the handsome son of your family’s sworn enemy. but you did, and now you must decide if you’d risk it all for your star-crossed romance with him or go forth with your arranged marriage with another man.

something to sink my teeth into by @kiri-ah vampire!jaemin x human reader

summary: A trip to Poland goes terribly wrong - or maybe terribly right - when you're bitten and kidnapped by a vampire. Between passing out, almost dying multiple times, and falling in love, you have a lot on your plate. Oh, and the magic. Right.

someone to spend eternity with by @mochi-baby-xoxo part two to ‘something to sink my teeth into’ above ^

last deception by @jaemotel agent!jaemin x fem!mafia boss!reader

summary: na jaemin, one of the best agents is sent to hunt down his ex lover without getting his feelings involved. jaemin is not the one to get out of track but what happens when he meets the love of his life, one more time?

the one that got away by @dear-hao jaemin x reader

summary: a perfect couple who just couldn’t get timing right.

wall talk by @dnylvu

summary: he’s the enemy, the one you’ve despised since the beginning of time. but he’s also the very man buried deep within you.

broken mirrors by @neovisioned jaehyun x reader

summary: Your college friends recall a creepy legend about a man that appears in mirrors and grants you two wishes when summoned. Jisung is dared to say his name three times and see what happens. At first you brush it off as some copy of bloody mary but, when your friend chickens out and swears something happened in that bathroom, you can’t deny the shift in atmosphere everyone felt. The urge to try it out mixed with fear pushes you over the edge. it’s probably fake anyways, right? You summon Jung Jaehyun in the middle of the night, on your bed, and he is not what you expected him to be.

I like you….the other you by @pastelsicheng spiderman!jaemin x reader

summary: Even after drifting apart from your friend Jaemin 3 years ago, you still have a big fat cr*sh on him. You’ve convinced yourself that you’ll get over him someday, but maybe it’s better that you didn’t get over him after all because Jaemin has a big fat cr*sh on you too. All it takes is you telling him about your feelings and saying you like him. Well, telling the other him. Alternatively, in which you have a big fat cr*sh on Spider-man’s alter-ego and Spider-man has a big fat cr*sh on you.

smultronställe part 2 by @gohyuck surgeon!jaemin x reader

summary: in which jaemin’s both a superdad and a supersurgeon and you can’t help but fall for him

the one that got away by @haechanplsacceptmylove sungchan & fem!reader

warnings: pregnancy, death, blood (bro i love this fic so much but i hate it because i cried so much and i don’t think i can bring myself to read it again because I’ll get to emotional and hate myself, it’s super angsty and has character death so read it if you think you’ll be ok with those themes)

random really good jaemin fic recs list by @jaesayshi

cat and mouse by @tyonfs

summary: tired of meaningless hookups and dull parties, na jaemin had always been hesitant to indulge himself. that is, of course, until he met you. however, upon realizing you’re none other than jeong jaehyun’s little sister, jaemin has to keep his relationship with you under wraps to make sure his team captain doesn’t find out.

just like the movies by @jensungf

summary: the kissing booth was a horrible movie, but somehow you still managed to get roped into watching the god-awful sequel, and the only reason you could blame was your stupid best friend by the name of lee donghyuck. oh, and the fact that you may or may not be whipped for him too.

that’s hot by @dreamcity-rawr pride!mark x reader

Summary: mark’s pride and ego start to get on your nerves so you decide to give him a piece of your mind, little did you know, you start become a piece always on his mind from then on

i became attracted to seaweed by @choerrypuffs son of poseidon!donghyuck x daughter of athena!reader

enchanted also by @choerrypuffs prince!jungwoo x witch!reader

summary: the prince has always been a little unconventional, but no one ever expected him to fall in love with a witch.

serve you, help you by @00-baejin-05 butler!jaemin x reader x butler!jeno

summary: it's normal to have servants serve you, especially if you are royalty. however, you didn't expect two butlers to be given to you, intead of maids. you learned how to trust them and deepen your connection with him... but it's gotten way too deep. (I somehow remember reading this but I also somehow don’t??)

grit your f*ckin teeth by @henlojeno mark x reader

summary: dubbed the grim reaper, one half of the strongest in the devil’s league, you were a supernatural hybrid known for strong wings and green lighting; admired and feared by both humans and myths alike, right until the day you disappeared with no explanation. cue your reappearance four months later, it’s up to you to mend the ties you left hanging and reconcile with those you’ve left behind, all while still scrambling to save lives from a crumbling society.

the interview by @whereisten vampire!doyoung x journalist reader

summary: you’re a journalist that just booked her biggest gig, an interview with Doyoung, a vampire notorious for a series of murders in your city.

gilded gold by @mint-yooxgi yandere vampire print jaehyun x reader

sun&moon by @fleurminho jaehyun x reader

(um so the acc deactivated before I got to post it but the plot was really cute so I’ll keep this here even if the links don’t lead to anything. all I remember was a soulmate au with jaehyun where you go to his concert and meet him there </3)

authors:

@nakamotocore @shotarology @bluejaem @jenoismydad @tenseoyong @taemin-jaemin

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alluringjae · 4 years ago

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until dawn; pt. II - ljn

part I | part II

⤑ summary: basic number one rule of the museum is not to touch the art. but no one told jeno that falling for one of them isn’t allowed either.

⤑ pairing: jeno x female reader

⤑ word count: 12.2k

⤑ genre: ANGST, fluff, romance, smut (f receiving, dom!jeno waow, dirty talk, wrap it everyone) | broke architecture major!jeno, historical figure!reader, enemies to lovers!au, college!au, night at the museum-inspired!au

⤑ warnings: references to actual historical figures, explicit language, graphic details, major heartbreak caused by another party, expect time jumps too

⤑ author’s note: happy jeno day!! i’ve been so excited to post this part, and i’m happy we’re here!! perhaps, this is the last long fic i’ll write for a while so i can rest, but i’ll still be posting short stories within the weeks to come! i’m excited for may to say the least hehe

btw, for the smut scene (indicated with **), i highly recommend you listen to strange (feat. hillary smith) by kris bowers!! this song is from the bridgerton soundtrack, and oh man, the feels!!

with that, enjoy!

italicized text either means they are personal notes or flashbacks.

this was meant to be more angsty, but either way, i screamed every time i wrote something gut-wrenching.

⤑ taglist: @renjunniehome

⤑ ctto above!!

⤑ leave me some feedback, constructive criticism, or hellos!

“You ready to get your butt beaten by me, Lee?”

“Prepare your final words when I win instead, (Y/L/N).”

Mischievous banter exchanged between you two became a new norm. Almost every night, someone within the art pieces established a contest over anything and it released the competitive sides of you two. So far, Jeno has been winning. Not like it hurt your pride, but maybe just once, you could conquer one game to feel better. Not only that, there’s a mini penalty for the loser. So far, you’ve cleaned up the lobby yourself and acted cutely to everyone the entire evening (or aegyo as Jeno called it).

Tonight, a game of archery was held by the Greek gods. They pushed away any extra pieces away, leaving the whole room vacant with two boards right beside Zeus’ throne. Numerous arrows were produced and sharpened, Zeus in the center announced to everyone participating.

“It’ll be 1 on 1 games. First to go are Jeno vs (Y/N), followed by Athena vs. Hermes, Cleopatra vs. Freddie, and last would be Hades vs Aphrodite.”

Cutting the chase, you didn’t expect Jeno to be that good at archery. Sure, he told you that he took classes with his friends for fun when he was younger, though it showed that he’s a fast learner and even hit one bullseye in the middle of the game.

Not slightly threatened until the last rounds, you fixed your aim and lessened your overthinking when preparing to shoot. Thus, you scored 2 bullseyes shot. It was a close fight, having the audience on the edge on their feet again because it’s the two of you. Your dynamic with the night guard always elevated the mood, shifting their bets over and over again.

By 1 point, you received your first victory against Jeno. Unlike you, he showcased his sportsmanship sweetly without any comments of disbelief. He’s never bragged about anything big in his life, not unless it’s a high grade for his plate. Normally, he celebrated wins in a laid-back manner. But don’t be fooled: he loves giving penalties.

“This is why I don’t make bets with my friends because I really go for their weak spots.”

“You’re cynical, Lee Jeno.”

“Only if you’re close to me, (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

“Aren’t we already past that stage?”

Almost halfway through his job, he sustained a meaningful friendship with you. Out of everyone, you were his default person to hang out within the nights he had a shift. If he wasn’t present, he made sure to give you small treats or gifts as much as possible. An innocent friendship, it was that the world would’ve never believed in.

Or was it?

“To celebrate your win, what do you want me to do?”

“You’re too kind for me to play around with, even if you’re the complete opposite of me.”

“I’ll make it simple and worthwhile since I don’t know when I’ll win a game again.” As your finger tapped your temple as you pondered deeply, a smart idea came through. “Grant me 3 wishes.”

He chuckled, lowering himself to view you better. “Am I like some genie now to you?”

“No room to complain, I won, didn’t I?” You grinned, raising one brow to show your dominance.

“You’re petty in your own way, aren’t you?”

“Perhaps. Now come on, I want to use my first wish.” You shrugged it off like no big deal, loving the high feeling of triumph. You lead him to the center of the lobby, where a beautiful grand piano only selected people get to play during exhibits. “Open the museum piano.”

Ever since you were brought to life, you never used it. Tempting but because people from the outside might here, maybe it’s time to try something new. A new challenge, and besides, you missed entertaining people through it. The last time you touched the delicate piano keys was to your family before you ran away.

It’s a good thing that in the shackle of keys Jeno held, the needed key was there. Unlocking the lustrous black instrument, you sat by the matching black bench. Crackling your fingers, you tested by pressing a few keys to get the hang of it again.

“What are you planning to play, (Y/N)?” Jeno leaned against the side, his arms crossed.

Humming the first notes of your piece, the nostalgia ran through your veins. “Nocturne No. 2 in E flat by Chopin.”

Your fingers took off and played each chord slowly and calmly. This piece reminded you the most of your mother, who sat by the couch in front of your old piano with your father while guests from the party they hosted crowded around you. Being the youngest, they often requested you to perform as entertainment so you always put your best foot forward. Or so you tried.

Nevertheless, no one else in your family was capable to play this piece as perfectly as you. By the way your eyes closed and your body swayed to the mellow tune, Jeno observed how you memorized this piece by heart. A passionate flame you were, outshining every pianist out there.

He wasn’t surprised at how multi-talented you were, though there’s a different kind of aura you present when you played the instrument. From your hard and tough front, you could be soft and sweet to the right people.

In a way, you showed your comfort toward the boy by serenading him with the piano. Sketching him with him in the past was one thing, but this was another. You’d sketch with people you’ve grown used to, but you play piano to people you want to cherish in your life. As dangerous as it seems, Jeno was someone special to you, only wanting to have good moments with him.

Junmyeon will always have a huge part in your museum life, but Jeno filled the emptiness that he left behind. This loneliness for a human friend vanquished thanks to Jeno, and you didn’t want to jeopardize it at all. Sure, whenever he acted like a gentleman around you, let you inside the Foreign Art Room, or brought you food sometimes, you couldn’t help feel honored.

Though lately, every time he showed off his strength when he defeated Zeus and Hades during an arm wrestle game the god held again. You seriously had to catch a breath at every flex his arms made, like the goddesses. Maybe how he pushed his black hair back when he’s drawing another plate, you’d give yourself a few extra seconds to see his long fingers skim through them. He’d bit his lower lip when he’s in too deep with his creativity, wondering if he’d bite the lower lip of the girl he’d ki-

All right, (Y/N), relax. Maybe you’re thinking this way because it’s been decades since your last relationship. You wouldn’t want to fall for another possible trap and hurt yourself again, right?

Ever since this job, Jeno’s university life drastically changed. Yes, he still hung out with his friends and performed extremely well in his classes, though he prioritized anything related to the museum wherever he was. If they were drinking out, he’d buy an extra bottle of soju for you on his way back to the dorm. Rarely does he get shitfaced anyways.

If he and Renjun visited the bookstore to purchase pens or any art-related materials, he always bought either an extra sketchpad or set of pens. Even if you were simply a figure to everyone else, he appreciated the bond you both developed.

Every night, he’d tell you about his day from the start. Normally, it consisted of a lot of schoolwork and coffee, some stories about his roommates too. Speaking of them, he’d insert a lot of humorous words about his entire group of friends, whom you learned their names too.

Mark, Jaemin, Renjun, Jisung, Chenle, and Donghyuck, each of them presented a different color in their group. Jeno, who’d admitted to being shy and quiet, grew out of his shell because of them. A friend of Jeno’s would automatically be a friend of yours, if only you were allowed to leave the museum or become a human.

Jeno learned more about your past explorations that never got documented because you no longer had an interest in jotting them down. They were adventures you’d kept to yourself, memories only close to you then would know. Except now, Jeno was another addition. You’re not the type to instantly open to people, though again, a sense of relief surrounded him every time you encounter each other. It grew gradually like a warm hug, softening your heart and breaking your walls.

The more he spent time with you, nothing feared Jeno the slightest. He’s always maintained himself intact, avoiding lines to be crossed and giving respect to those who deserve it. However, he began to question himself where exactly his feelings lie with you after Jaemin tried to set him up on a blind double date just so the best friend of his date wouldn’t feel left out.

He’s rarely one to get crushes on people, even when other girls in his college openly showed their affection towards him. Valentine’s Day or his birthday, several girls sent him chocolate or flowers. Jaemin and Renjun got sick of girls reaching out to them first so they could reach him. It’s not because he’s not the dating type, but because he’s so goal-oriented that unlike his roommates, he doesn’t have a slight clue about dating.

Though one-night stands while at a party and dating were completely different, he’d still say he had experience with girls. Plus having an older sister, he never took advantage of them. He’d rather tell them in person that the feelings weren’t mutual than ghosting them. He’s not like Jaemin anyways.

With that, he’s so lost when his heart beats twice as fast the second you’ve woken up from your posing slumber. He doesn’t comprehend how flustered he’d be when you highly insist to help him with his plate or how cute he finds it when you’re playing fetch with Mochi. On top of it, when you chose to sketch each other for one of your sketching sessions, he’d take a longer stare at your visage before he drew some strokes.

A lot of historical accounts mentioned how your beauty was the standard of the Victorian era, wherein you were the jewel of your neighborhood and numerous men wanted your hand. Women envied you, especially having high intelligence skills that were equivalent to a man. That time, that felt like a threat to most men. Though surprisingly, it turns out there were men who liked intelligent girls.

Jeno knew he liked you as a friend, though liking you past that he didn’t intend. Nor was it allowed because it’ll break one of the golden rules. Before he’d go beyond contemplating, he had to stop himself. This was so unlike him. The feelings will fleet away, he’d repeat to himself. Don’t waste a great friendship because of your silly emotions.

Individually, both of you swallowed these harboring feelings down your guts and simply kept your friendship status safe. Doing your typical activities or whatever else you could think of, none of you minded to change it whatsoever.

Unknown to you though, it was obvious to the other art pieces ones that you two practically passed off as young lovers. Although they know that pushing one towards the other went against the rules, Aphrodite begged to differ.

“Holding them back from expressing what they really feel just because of the law here is a tragedy. They should at least try, you know?”

On another typical night, Jeno invited you to the Theater Room for a movie marathon. After finding out that you’ve never seen any moving pictures, he wanted to be there to introduce it. Luck was on his side to not have plates or requirements due for the week and everyone was behaving themselves, so he started with rolling out short films from the 88mm projector. Having premade popcorn and drinks, the two of you shared roars of laughter and emotional tears.

Switching to the cd player for longer and clearer films, you’d opt to believe that you were born at the wrong time. With all these advancements, it came with a lot of new beliefs. One of them was allowing women to study and work. Then again, she was a pioneer according to historians. Without her, it wouldn’t help shape society as it is today.

Nonetheless, this movie Jeno played on the big screen was what he defined as “one of the classics”, 10 Things I Hate About You.

This outspoken character named Kat was presenting a poem to her class, trying to hold in her raw emotions towards Patrick, the boy who broke her heart. Too engaged, you didn’t notice how Jeno stretched his arms out so he could wrap one around your shoulder. Not that you were complaining, his warmth reassuring you safety.

“I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick; it even makes me rhyme. I hate it, I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie.” The way she attempted to keep her strong ground only reminded you of where you were weeks ago, especially once she excruciatingly broke down.

“I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you're not around, and the fact that you didn't call. But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.” Only when you leaned back to the chair, you felt his arm. His thumb caressing your covered shoulder, you peeked him a little bit. His eyes fixated on the screen, absorbed in the acting and how Kat’s tears weren’t scripted as she stormed out of the classroom.

Not that you were her, but it sparked the past memory of how you merely disliked him because of his job. But as a person, not even close, not even once did you hate him. How blessed that he never judged you for it, staying patient all this time.

Right before he could look back at you, you moved your face back to resume your watching. Jeno definitely noticed what you did, though not sure as to why. Whatever it was, it wasn’t harmful.

Once the film ended, Jeno checked his watch for the time. 4 am, he wanted to do something else now instead of film viewing. You were on par with it, wanting to walk it out after being seated for hours. As you both cleaned up and bid the posters outside goodbye, the doors to the museum were locked unexpectedly. Impossible on Jeno’s half because he had the keys for every room, but he double-checked his bunch.

Alas, the keys for these doors specifically were missing. But there was no other way anyone could’ve gotten it, plus it’s not like the last person he talked to, which was Aphrodite, would need it.

Or did she?

Rather than putting any blame on each other, your only wish now was to return to your section before sunrise. You and he could just relax momentarily before yelling for help.

“Maybe we should watch another film first?”

“Alright, you choose while I return the rest.”

As Jeno inserted the cd of Cinema Paradiso inside, the background music of the opening played. He hummed the first notes, already feeling the love from this film. Another must-see classic as recommended by Renjun, he wanted to rewatch it with you.

Slowly returning each cd and film roll to their respective drawers, the melodious theme had you waltzing in the small space. Even beyond your life, classical music never gets old. Aging like fine wine, sounding spectacular as time passes because of people’s creativity.

Jeno gazed over your sudden movements, smiling uncontrollably at how immersed you were as you multi-tasked. However, you took a wrong turn by the desk and almost dropped a priceless film roll. But before you fully slipped and fell, a pair of strong arms caught you at the right time. Panting from the nerves, mostly when he was inches from your face. Never has he pressed his body this close to you to protect you, and never have you seen his captivating eyes this up close.

As enchanting as the background music of Ennio Morricone was, it only became noise once Jeno took ahold of the film roll on your hand and placing down on the desk. Taking another step closer, you were backed up by the edge. Not to mention how his height dignified his impact on you, your arms were still situated by your side with nowhere else to go.

That was until his finger elevated your chin so he could meet you on eye-to-eye level. His other hand gripping your waist, you became brave enough to place your hands by his broad shoulders. Licking your lips, you glanced at his lips quickly. But he noticed it, and as risky as this was, it was a leap of faith to take.

“May I kiss you?”

Always such a gentleman, even when he already knew how much you desired him through your returning affections. Calming your breath patterns by the speed of everything occurring, you came back to your senses. He’s the one who constantly told you not to forget your roots, so you were going to take this one.

You trust him, and he does too.

“Yes.”

Since the first film, some kind of tension increased the closer he moved or intimate his actions were towards you. You kept pushing it back in hopes not to ruin what you both have. But it only turned out to be mutual, especially how none of you held back as soon as his lips passionately clashed yours.

Tangling your arms around his neck, you stood on your tiptoes to press even closer to him. Feeling his lively heart pumping against your hollow chest, you bit his lower lip. Something you’ve secretly craved to do, he growled from the pleasure. He hoisted your waist to the desk, his impatient hands earnestly traveling all over your body. While your legs locked around his torso, your feisty nature leaned back so your entire body lied on the small desk.

Jeno was on top, placing one hand down to hold himself while the other squeezed your waist firmly. Even if you’re made of wax, you’re like an actual living woman at night. Everything about you becomes real until dawn. You emitted vulgar moans, giving him more access to your neck. Peppering a mix of soft to hard kisses, your hand teasingly snaked under his shirt. He really wasn’t joking when he bragged that he was quite ripped since he enjoyed sports and going to the gym, cupping a part of his toned abdomen.

“If you want something, all you have to do is ask.” He sluggishly sucked the area between your ear and neck, one of your weakest spots. “What’s on your mind, baby?”

The growing moistness in between your legs left a stain in your panties, trying to close your legs out of embarrassment. It’s been decades since you’ve been stimulated like this. However, Jeno beat you to it as he trailed the hand that was on your waist and lowering it right above your covered sex. He cupped it agonizingly slow, making you folding your leg from the pleasure. For a man who doesn’t date around, he knew exactly what he’s doing.

“I just kissed you, and you’re already this soaked. Can you handle me, baby?”

As the strong woman that you present yourself to be, it would selfishly take the right touch from the right man to weaken you. With his savage lips back on yours while your hands clutched on his shirt, he was simply waiting for a verbal answer, yet driving you completely mad. Everything was happening so fast, and here he was to please you in anywhere you seem fit.

You were deprived, and oh, you needed it more than ever.

However, seconds before you replied, there was loud rumbling from the main doors which stopped your devilish antics. As Jeno moved back from you to see the ruckus, you lifted yourself back up, pulling back your dress sleeves and flattening out the creases. The last thing you wanted was a trail of familiar red marks from the aggressive male, finding any reflective surfaces to check.

“I wouldn’t be that dumb to leave you hickies now, would I?” Jeno ended your worries as he placed his hands by your side again. His face leaned towards yours again, reliving the warmth in your cheeks. His lips were plumper, catching traces of your coral lipstick smudged there down to his jaw. He slotted himself again between your legs, grazing a hand on your waist and the other to your warm cheek. “The door’s unlocked now, and it’s 5 am. Do you want to clean up now?”

You playfully scoffed, aware that neither of you had plans to do that yet. Such a player while in the heat of the moment.

“Spare me 15 more minutes with you first.”

Hiding the romance you’ve both built failed without trying. Aphrodite spotted all the signs from your open physical affection and words of admiration, calling you two out in front of everyone without shame. She is the goddess of love, after all. You couldn’t fool her even if you tried.

Plus, she’s the one who locked the two of you up in the Theater Room that night. But neither of you know that.

“Sketch my ideal home?” Jeno bent down to the table, testing out his newly bought pens so they wouldn’t spill.

“Isn’t that why you decided to pursue Architecture in the first place? Come on now!” You pestered across him, opening your new sketchpad since your last one ran out of pages. As expected, Jeno bought you one when he went to the bookstore. As much as you insisted not to because he should use the money somewhere else, he did it anyway. He loved your works, encouraging you in any way he could.

When he was reminded of his humble beginnings of his passion for architecture by you, never had he envisioned exactly how his perfect home would be like. Settling down was so far beyond his mind, only focusing to graduate university then study for the licensure exams. However, he did miss drawing something for fun, not as a requirement. He also was the one who took charge of designing his dorm.

“Fine, only if you draw what your ideal home would’ve been if you never left London.”

Now as lovers, the only addition to your relationship were the public and private exchanges of affection. Deep conversations, film viewing, back and forth banter, you’re both still the same competitive duo everyone expected to be together. In public, the two of you held hands, hugged, kissed each other cheeks too when it felt right. Cleopatra’s face of fake nausea was priceless every time, while Princess Diana, Anne, and Katherine enjoyed it. It’s been years since they’ve seen this glow of adoration in you. Bit by bit, you’re going back to the old you. Except now, you’re a lot stronger.

Perhaps, this version of you proved wrong for the need for romance. Even if you made the choice not to settle down then, it would’ve been different if Jeno was in your universe then.

“Are you done there?” Jeno asked while you were finishing up your masterpiece. Life in London sounded fun when you were younger, having all these ideas on interior design and the like. An innocent time.

Instead of replying, you strode to his side and compared your pieces together. He pictured a two-story home, with a backyard and rooftop area. He definitely wanted to stay in the city as his whole life was based there. Although you preferred living in the countryside more for more freedom, you gave it a shot by pinpointing every detail of a wealthy typical Victorian-era home you liked. You desired a spacious lobby with a grand staircase in the middle, a crystal chandelier there too. The living room would have a small library and a grand piano, where wide doors leading to the grasslands were beside it.

Considering you two lived from different times, in a way your ideal homes were similar. Somewhere private, surrounded by nature and minimal furniture, you’re curious as to how it would look if the two of you fused them together. A mix of old and new, will it look pretty?

“What will look pretty?” Jeno questioned your random thought, looking back and forth at your sketches. “You know who’s pretty though?”

“If you say what I think you’re going to say, I’m lea-”

“You.”

Jeno has gotten flirtier since that night, always finding the right opportunity to flatter you. Although you denied them out of embarrassment, the butterflies in your stomach can’t lie to you.

You’re so smitten, and so was he.

Jeno’s always one to follow the rules, but so far, he’s been breaking some of them already.

Just last night, he gave Renjun access to the lively museum because he needed more research regarding you. Initially, he practically interviewed Jeno for every piece of information he gathered because he used to be so deep in the books to study everything about you. Now in the past, Renjun still couldn’t forget how Jeno drunkenly admitted how crazy he was going to be over you and your coldness whilst sobering up in the dorm.

He didn’t understand one bit by that, especially when you’re technically dead. But by the sight of the first piece Renjun saw alive, which was Zeus, he almost passed out. Piece by piece, he viewed these artworks come to life from his fresh eyes. Right before he could’ve screamed when Athena shot a lightbulb in their exhibit, you happily called out Jeno’s name.

Renjun froze on the spot upon seeing your wax figure come to life. He’s browsed through this museum numerously due to the new exhibits, but lately, he checked your section out to find any tiny details that were linked to your life. Aside from the sketchpad, compass, and hairpins, he wanted to know if there was more to your life as an explorer.

As human interactions except the night guard weren’t allowed, Renjun needed help for his project in Women Studies. Just like Jeno’s assignment, you aided him. Fruitfully answering every question he gave you, Athena popped out of nowhere to inspect Jeno.

“I see you’re breaking another rule.”

“I’m sorry, Athena. He was desperate, and it would be selfish of me to let him fail.”

“This is the last one I’ll let slide, alright?” Athena huffed, not impressed by the reckless behavior Jeno acquired over time. She saw this coming, but for a change, she couldn’t punish him. He was a young adult, still learning more about life. Only will she step in if things turn for the worst. “I can’t believe I’ve gained a soft spot for you.”

Jeno laughed, hugging the figure like his older sister. “You love me though!”

Glad to say, Renjun aced his project and kept his word of not telling anyone about the happenings in Jeno’s job. Jeno even made a makeshift non-disclosure contract so Renjun wouldn’t spill the slightest details.

Lately, so much has been happening in the museum that having alone time with each other was rare. And when you did, the two of you made sure to maximize it and make every intimate moment count. From each touch, each longing kiss, each moan, and groan, never were you left hanging whether you’re at the Theater Room, Jeno’s office, or the Foreign Art Room.

The only time the two of you went beyond the boundaries was at the indoor garden. Jeno managed to get the key to it, lighting up some candles before you invited you inside. Thanks to the magic of the Greek gods, the cameras were bewitched to display fake imageries when security checks in the morning after.

Upon your deep conversations, you’ve mentioned once or twice about the indoor garden. It was the latest addition of the museum, opening in the early 2000s. Because it was a sacred place, no art piece was ever allowed inside.

Yet again, Jeno challenged the rules again when he invited you inside. A few minutes before, he set up some lights along the hallway of the garden, where he placed a blanket, a picnic basket, and his laptop right at the end of it. The best place to view everything, he just knew you’d love it.

He was undoubtedly right once you gasped at such a pretty sight. Seeing the silhouettes of various flowers and plants together with the night sky with all the stars sparkling, it was like you’re attending another ball with your sisters, who were looking for suitors then.

Once Jeno leisurely led you until the end, he brought out all the delicacies from the basket. One of them was this Italian savory dish of dough with toppings such as cheese and pepperoni, or pizza as they named it. The next ones were fresh strawberries and melted chocolate, followed by grape juice.

“I’d drink actual alcohol with you again, only if I didn’t get shitfaced and do my job properly.”

“Point taken. Besides, this is close enough. So pour me a drink please.”

Perhaps this was the closest to a date Jeno could ever ask you out to. With the restrictions and being constrained with time, he brainstormed all sorts of ways to bring the outside world to you. From simply letting you wander around this fascinating room, he unleashed the inner romantic in him. None of his friends would’ve thought since they never asked him about it, so he kept it to himself only. Finally, he’s satisfied with what he prepared. After eating, the two of you would watch more films before the sun rose again.

You’re just the right person for him at the moment he can act that way.

After your quiet stroll and sitting back down, Jeno surprisingly handed you a tiny box.

“A gift?”

“Open it.” He sipped on his juice, paying attention to your actions. Gently untying the box, the amazement in your eyes couldn’t fathom such a lovely present. No words were required to verify that Jeno outdid himself again, just your facial expression alone is enough.

When Jeno said that he pays attention to the tiny details, he doesn’t bluff. Throughout your growing relationship, you’ve cited how you wanted another special flower in your life. Just because you couldn’t view lavender roses the same way ever again, it didn’t mean you wanted to kick them out of your life. Flowers were one of nature’s beautiful creations, so you’re wishing to find the love you once had for lavender roses in other ones.

Thus, you came across what you thought held the highest form of meaning: red roses. Despite its thorns, it’s still a marvelous flower. Innocently, you told him that just because of the memory of your father giving them to your mother on her birthday yearly.

Red roses represented true love and romance, a discreet message only those eager would know.

Jeno was one of them, which was why he reserved this gift for this very moment. It was a necklace he found through a college fair recently, a subtle red rose pendant in the center. Since he couldn’t give you huge gifts, he settled for something light. Something none of the guards or the director wouldn’t pinpoint out when they do their inspections.

“Do you like it?”

Not one utter from your mouth since you’re so hypnotized, your lips quirked up in a charming smile. “Is that even a question? This is astonishing, Jeno.”

After you attempted to put it around your neck, Jeno sighed and stepped in to help you out. “Turn around, (Y/N). Let me.”

The tension gradually heightened once you held your hair up so Jeno accessibly viewed your clean neck. Clasping the lock, it took all his might to hold himself back from you. Even from behind, your silhouette was attractive to him. The lights he set up weren’t helping the slightest of what he’s thinking to do with you.

“Done.” He breathily whispered in your ear.

If he thought he was the only one feeling something powerful, he’d be more than wrong. The lingering sensation of his slim fingers gracing your décolletage area unhinged another kind of want, the one you’ve only imagined in your mind when you were needy and alone. It shouldn’t be a sin unless you’re with the person you’ve fallen for, right?

Facing him again, the eye contact didn’t last long when you were the first one to strike a move. Jeno kissed back right away, his hands pulling you closer by your waist. Whatever sultry music Jeno played, it gave you the perfect momentum to grind on his lap. He groaned against kisses, adding his tongue. His thumbs sensually rubbed your hipbones, one of your hands toying around with his hair while the other one balled up his shirt by the chest. None of you cared if anyone caught you.

The last time you’ve been this aggressive was at the Theater Room, which eventually increased the hidden lust you’ve had towards each other. Taking things slowly at first, it’s about time to delve in for more. The mood was already set from the start, even if Jeno didn’t plan this to happen here. But being the prepared man he is, he did have a condom in his back pocket.

Your fingers trailed from his neck until his crotch. He was hard, sensing how suffocated he must be. But he kept himself in control. Locking eye contact, you sweetly spoke.

“Grant my second wish, Jeno.” That same hand of yours held one of his, planting it in your breast. “Make love to me.”

Giving the go-signal, he crashed his lips on yours while stripping you off your dress. Carefully, he turned you around to untie your tight corset. Once it fell, your neck leaned sideways as his lips attacked it madly. Your breaths were tremulous, placing both his hands on your freed breasts to knead with. His touch felt like fire on your skin, yet you couldn’t stop.

“Jeno,” Obscene moans from your lips choked out. You desired more, shifting back to face him again to attack his lips. Slowly feeling one of his hands laying you down, you spread your legs with ease just for him. He parted after your head landed on the cushion to unbutton himself. The way your mouth dropped to selfishly stare at his bare body, flexing them before getting back into position. He was fit and toned just as Cleopatra predicted.

As much as Jeno knew how wild your thoughts were getting, he was more taken aback by your perky chest.

“Fuck, you are divine.” He sucked one nipple as his fingers ventured to slip your panties down. So much was going on, you didn’t know which stimulated you more. You tried to close your legs around his hand, but he slapped your inner thigh to stop you.

The cool breeze shivered you, especially from your core. Jeno’s fingers adventurously grazed from your hip area to your lower lips. He teasingly rubbed it up and down in your essence, his index finger settling it right at your needy clit. Another moan escaped your lips, an opportunity for Jeno to slide his tongue in your mouth. Enjoying the moment, his fingers dipped inside you. A gasp broke your kiss, making him giggle in your ear.

He knew exactly what he was doing.

“Oh, angel. The things I want to do with you.”

Sliding them back and forth, curling it even, you squirmed for more. Dropping himself to meet your core, Jeno placed your legs on his shoulder. Pushing you closer, his steamy breath felt like friction. Your hips grinded against it, so he gripped on them so you stay put.

“Angel,” He chuckled darkly, his crotch tightening at how powerless you looked. “You’re so pretty.”

You were drenched from arousal. But to Jeno, you were glowing under the lights. He wanted to take his time to admire what he had done to you. His independent girl, only weak for him.

His fingers unfolded in your lower lips, diving in to your orbit. You could hardly speak from his skilled mouth, especially his tongue savagely lapping your clit in numerous paces. You’ve only daydreamed about what it could do aside from kissing, and it exceeded your expectations. By the heated sensation that had the heels of your feet digging his back deeply, you affirmed to have seen more stars than the night sky above you.

Your back arched uncontrollably while his hands grasped your hips to stay in place, the tears in your eyes formulating while tugging on his hair. Your thighs clenched around his face, but his broad shoulders widened it to taste more of you. No use of pulling away when his grip on you was tight, so you could only cry out from the pleasure.

“Fuck!”

The ringing sounds in your off were going off, your throat drying up from moaning once another orgasm was about to hit. Once the knot in you snapped, nothing could hold back your screams of pleasure whilst panting for air. Sensitive as he licked every remaining essence he caused, he smirked as he got up to unbuckle his jeans.

Oh, boy. He got quite a package behind his boxers.

Even while you were overly sensitive, you had to grasp it in your hands. He was yours, and you were his.

The way you clenched around his protected length, pausing to readjust yourself to the feeling. The foreplay deemed helpful, though the girth of him overwhelmed you. He stretched you out so good.

“Are you okay, (Y/N)?” The stunned face you made was expected, still feeling worried that it may be too much.

Biting your lip, you moaned once everything felt bearable. “You can move, Jeno.”

None of you could track exactly how many rounds you went through. Even in the semi-public area, it didn’t hinder either of you. There’s that thrill, and surprisingly enough, you both shared the liking of it. Always switching the positions, you decided to call it quits after another sloppy round in missionary. Something seeing Jeno on top, fully submitting yourself to him, made you feel calm to be vulnerable. It’s really the trust you’ve established from the start, making you rely on humans again once you’ve let the past be.

Jeno brought out another blanket, initially meant for cuddling. It was still applicable though, curling your body into a spoon towards his racing chest. Music was no longer noise, the intimacy creeping back instead of lust this time. The afterglow of Jeno, sweaty and knackered as his legs sprawled under the sheet, was a sight for sore eyes. He’s always been handsome while on duty, but post-sex gave him an extra boost.

Plus there’s pride from the red marks courtesy of you on his chest, grazing over it softly.

Jeno chuckled softly at your smooth fingers, lifting them up to kiss them tenderly before kissing your lips again. Only humans were capable of and to love, but you’re some kind of an exception. Regardless of the magic from the plate, you’d be able to love too if it weren’t for your background.

There’s so much love Jeno wanted to offer you, even if he hasn’t said it out loud yet.

Perhaps one reason was because time was beginning to tick. Finals were a few weeks away, then the one-month long semestral break until a new semester kicks off. Time really flew by, and his bank account and heart expanded too. Enjoying the now was all he could think of doing, but those uncertainties bothered him.

The biggest would be where you and he would stand when his job ended.

Jeno was too absorbed in his internal debate, as portrayed by his eyes staring off in space and running his hand in his hair repeatedly. Something was disturbing him, and you’re concerned as to what it was.

“Jeno,” Around his arm, you tapped his chest to get him out of it. “What’s going on in your head?”

Jeno approached every obstacle he faces straightforwardly, not wanting to let him hold back. Rarely did he keep secrets, especially from you. Instead of hiding away, he voiced it out.

“(Y/N), will we work out?”

“What do you mean, Jeno?”

You’re so occupied in the present that thinking of the future was never in your field. Like him, you’re just enjoying being in the moment. Though after tonight, it’s making you wonder if there’s a future.

“Well,” He placed his hand on top of yours, affectionately observing you. “Times flies faster when you’re having fun, and well, the semester is ending.”

His last words crushed a part of your heart, remembering his initial plan. None of you expected your friendship to bloom into what it is now, but life was just full of surprises without a schedule. At the same time, none of you wouldn’t have it any other way.

It may have been a few months since you two committed to each other, but the spark was still strong. It wasn’t like a summer romance kind of feeling. Time was not a determinant of love either, which you were certain of it with Jeno. A lot more than Junmyeon.

It should’ve frightened you when you realized your love for Jeno, but it didn’t. Even if you didn’t age physically, your mindset did. You’ve learned to forgive your younger self, and through Jeno, you let your guard down completely. From that, you let love in. Platonic to your fellow art pieces, and all of the above to Jeno.

Throughout your relationship, you regained all confidence in yourself and everything you set your mind to.

“I wouldn’t want to worry too much about it if I were you.” Your body flipped to lie on your stomach, resting your head on your palm.

“Why shouldn’t I, angel?”

Gazing back at him, you left a velvety kiss on his lips to rest his thoughts. His hand wrapped your neck, deepening it. But you pulled away with a giggle, all too knowing of his secret intentions as his cock began to harden again. His eyes narrowed down and his lower lip stuck out at your attempt of being a tease.

But enough about sex, you wanted to address a point.

Lee Jeno was going to be the biggest risk you wanted to take and fight for, and no one should try to stop you.

“I’ll ask Circe for a potion. For me, for you, for us.”

If it weren’t for insistent questioning towards every art piece, who kept their mouths shut, only Circe herself banished him from his suffering. Her series of potions varied, and the one you requested years ago which you threw out was capable of turning any art piece into a living human. No potion of Circe ever failed, so you entrusted your life for the day you do drink it.

“Are you sure, angel?”

Jeno knew about that one specifically, and as great to hear that you never threw it out, he never put pressure on you. He wanted you to do whatever felt right, even if deep down, he wished you’d use it. He was only worried about how the flow of the entire museum would be disrupted.

Typical Jeno always looking out for you, but you saw right through his concern. Here you were, caressing his check as reassurance. With an honest smile,

“I’ve never been more certain with anything in my life here until you came, Lee Jeno.”

Jeno opened up more to his life outside the museum, telling all sorts of experiences not just his days as a university student. From his childhood, his family, his travels, heck you even want to meet his friends at this point!

Newly, he shared with you how the sunrise and sunset looked like in Seoul with much vivacity. It’s a luxury as a human to witness as day breaks and ends, so you could imagine by yourself how it would look like. Sure, you had drawings and all, but that was from the real (Y/N) (Y/L/N).

This version of you wanted to live more; that’s your greed now.

“You’ve never touched snow too, right?” Jeno, who had his arm wrapped around you, silently watched the first batch of snow from inside.

“Yup, that’s the thing when you’re imprisoned in this place.” You sulked by his side, earning a chuckle from him who pulled you in closer.

“Don’t tell me now that you despise this place.”

“I don’t, but it hinders me to experience new things. The whole pattern of being awake at night by a plate gets tiring, Jeno.”

All Jeno would do when you’re frustrated was placing your head on his shoulder, listening as you talk.

“I know, angel. But it won’t be long until you leave this place with me, right?”

“You know it!” You interlocked your hands with him, eyes trained at every falling snowflake.

Sometimes, moments in silence with Jeno were all you needed for the night. Being within each other’s presence, focusing or admiring something from afar, it was all the peace you’ve needed from the bustling art pieces.

This week was the last of the semester, and Jeno’s off duty for tonight to focus on his exams. You’ll see him tomorrow night, which was his last shift ever, and also yours too.

Perhaps the biggest milestone you’re committing to without any regrets.

However, it took an unnecessary conversation you accidentally eavesdropped on to rock your decision.

You needed more ink after running out mid-way of sketching the sculptures as a secret parting gift. Before you could take a single step inside your exhibit room, a series of voices were full-on arguing. Booming back and forth, you peeped your ear out whilst hiding against the door.

“Athena, how dare you did to her?! She’s done so well from moving on from it, falling in love even! And now you’re telling me this?!” The distinct voice of Princess Diana, who spoke sweetly most of the time, boomed towards the Greek god. “You’re heartless.”

“I did what I had to do for the sake of this place, Diana!” Athena raised her voice, the lightning in her hands holding back from lashing out. She hated it when anyone argued with her, especially when she does things according to what she believed was necessary. Out of everyone, she had more leadership. “She had to know that her place is here as a wax figure, not outside. Talking Junmyeon out of it was for the best, plus it’s ideal when he drank the potion of memory loss from Circe.”

“But it tore her apart when he left her, and it’s going to tear her again if you do the same with Jeno.”

“How else are you going to approach the situation then, Diana? Those two have broken the highest golden rule, so they need to wake up.”

Right when she celebrated within herself for healing, hearing the unbearable revelation behind the past devastated you. This whole time, she internally blamed herself for being ageless and lashed out at others. The scary past barged back in, and you couldn’t handle it anymore.

Somewhere in the corner, you wept without a trace. You could care less about Athena’s opinions, but you found yourself agreeing to some of her words. You had a role to fulfill, and leaving that behind would be selfish and it could make the museum go topsy-turvy. As painful for Junmyeon to leave you, it was because the truth hurts. Nothing could change it, even if Circe could be your solution because it’ll leave a lot of questions. You didn’t want Jeno to be seen as a suspect.

Oh, Jeno.

There’s nothing wrong with falling in love either, you didn’t intend it to happen. But it becomes unfair when it compromises with your purpose, and that’s not how you are. You’ll always remember Jeno as your biggest risk, though it’s time to end things. Treacherous as it was to accept for you, risk-takers have boundaries too.

Fast forward, on the night of Jeno’s last shift, you’ve cherished every second with him. Playing around, chatting with other art pieces, kissing in private, you made it count. Before dawn broke, that’s where you chose to come clean by the garden, your sacred place. Not even your self-reassurance could prepare you to witness the hurt and confusion Jeno felt.

“You’re a mortal, and you still get to choose your path. Mine is already predetermined here as a wax copy of a historical figure.” You advised as you held both his hands, your voice shaking at the reality.

A few days ago, you were beaming with exhilaration at a new journey but now you’ve permanently backed out. Jeno couldn’t comprehend, and as much as he tried, he couldn’t. A life without you by his side would be empty and dull. “Even so, there are things about you that the original person didn’t have.”

Arguing with him wasn’t your favorite, and it’ll leave the two of you in a bad mood. But there is no way to negotiate this; you’ve already made up your mind. “We must end this, Jeno. You need someone who can grow old with you, and I can’t be that person for you.”

“But we can make it work!” His hands gripped on your slumped shoulders, whilst your face avoiding his to spare yourself from the heartache. “There’s still Circe.”

“I know, but recently, I found out that she’s an indirect cause of my misery.” Pulling away from his touch, you belted with frustration. “I cannot do this anymore, Jeno.”

You’ve always fought for whatever you wanted in life, and Jeno knew he was one of them if it weren’t for you telling him that. So he did the same, thinking of ways to make you feel whole. Now, he couldn’t tolerate the sudden crumbling of his heart from your outburst, and all he wanted to know was why you felt this way. How could he help you?

You don’t keep secrets from Jeno, but the truth behind your harsh actions cannot be revealed for the sake of the museum. Plus, you didn’t want him to despise this place he admired. Causing him pain wasn’t on your list, but keeping him safe was. It may be shown differently and he may not understand it now, but over time, he will.

“Jeno, you’ll find someone better out there. Someone with their whole life ahead of them, who’ll love you for everything that makes you who you are.” Repetitive punches in your guts urged you to barf at your half-lie, but you held it in.

“Why are you pushing me away? What happened to taking risks, (Y/N)?” Jeno interrogated, taking your hands in his hands again. They unconventionally quivered, like his lips. Jeno has never cried in front of anyone, not even when he was younger. Though for you, he just might. “Am I not worth it for you?”

Dear heavens, he was wrong. You internally screamed that, but you can’t let your selfishness seize the night. As Athena said, you had to wake up from your dream. “Committing to you was my biggest risk of them all, Jeno. Everything else that went along with it, I don’t regret it one bit. But time’s really up for us, and we must resume our normal duties.”

“I can’t lose you, (Y/N).”

“You never will, Jeno.”

He crouched lower to meet your height, his finger moving your head so you’d look at him back. Weakly enough, you did. “I want you to be a part of my normal life, angel.”

“I’ll always be here, you know. I’ll be standing in my usual spot upstairs, and you can drop by whenever you can.” You pressed your lips, lifting your head to avoid incoming tears. Meanwhile, he began shedding a few. You’ve hurt him big time, and you’ll never forgive yourself for this. “I still have one wish, right?”

Jeno’s sorrow was beyond his capacity, leaning his forehead against yours to kiss it. No matter what he could say or do, he already knew it won’t be effective. You’re affirmative in your choices, yet he still wanted to challenge it. All he wanted to know was why you’re doing this.

“Let me walk you one last time to your section.”

The black night sky had remnants of blue, motioning that dawn was approaching. Other figures gave their goodbyes to Jeno earlier, cleaning up their areas before they pose. Though none of them anticipated such a cold atmosphere between you two, they could only spy on what was bound to happen.

“My last wish is for you to let me go, Jeno.” You avowed, blinking your eyes with faux positivity. Your hands patted his blazer so it wouldn’t crease. “I already have a role to fulfill here, and you’re on the way to yours, future architect.”

“I love you, (Y/N) (Y/L/N).” Only tonight did he muster his courage to finally admit it to you after giving himself more time to analyze it. Timing was always crucial, and the badness of it showed.

Deep in your heart, you resonated the feeling. But it’ll make things more complicated, and it was the final thing you’ve wanted to occur. Someone had to be the strong one, and now, it should be you. With one more compassionate kiss on his lips, you stepped inside your section and readied your position.

“Goodbye, Lee Jeno.”

The sunshine brightened the room, and you’ve frozen to slumber again.

All Jeno could do was drop on his knees, sobbing over your rash actions. Unknown to him, a single tear left your eye as you posed.

Regardless of what status you were in, the pain of it all remained.

Jeno spent most of his semestral break with his friends to travel or whatnot, trying to forget it all. Even if he aced all his finals, his efforts felt like nothing if he never had you by his side to celebrate.

The sting over his short-lived romance with you never diminished the slightest, no one whom he could express his pain about it to especially when Renjun drank the memory wipe potion that Athena initially left for Jeno by his desk.

Forget it all, and live a peaceful life. You have so much potential, my mentee.

- Athena

Perhaps this was the same thing Junmyeon drank all those years ago, but unlike him, he didn’t have the guts to. He still wanted another chance.

So every day since the new semester began, he spent every afternoon break at your section. He’ll be seated by the bench, doing his assignments and talking about his day while sometimes stealing a glance of your figure. Some habits don’t change.

He never got sick of the same smile you exemplified, falling even more for you. He’ll often wonder what you’ve been up to.

What are your new sketches?

Are you taking care of Mochi well?

Have you apologized to Sanghoon yet?

Speaking of him, he surprisingly scooted over to Jeno’s side. This was the first time Jeno met the man, and politely enough greeted him. Sanghoon interviewed the boy, asking all sorts of questions that Jeno had every answer to. The biggest change that Sanghoon noticed since he left was your personality. You no longer bite, but treat everyone kindly without bias. You’re always active to help him out in cleaning the lobby, and you don’t go easily defensive.

Once he found out that Jeno was the reason for that, he was overjoyed at the start and wanted to meet him some way. You were a tough cookie, but now you relaxed. That was all that mattered to him, hoping to know more about him from you. That was until Diana stepped in and told him everything that happened. Mostly, the bad.

Playfulness eventually bore love. The last time you fell in love was in the 80s and Junmyeon pushed you away, he recalled. This time, you’re pushing Jeno away because you simply agreed with Athena’s points.

This wasn’t right, but it wasn’t his place to interfere.

But then again, he finally caught Jeno for the first time today and this time, he was open to hearing his side of the story. Lessen his misery too.

“No matter how stubborn she is, she loves you.” He advised him, bringing out one of your full sketchbooks. As Jeno opened it, the majority of the portraits were him. Sleeping, smiling, laughing, you drew him from every minor detail you could spot like the mole near his eye and his crescent eyes.

A handsome face I would never get sick until the end of time. Someone I want to wake up to every day in the morning if it weren’t for that plate.

- (Y/N)

Towards the end, a sketch of a house unfolded. The interior was a fusion of modernity and old royal design due to its white walls, wide space, and the placing of less furniture, plus an open backyard. There’s another tiny comment on the side from you.

I was right. Joining our varying designs together is pretty. Maybe Jeno and I could live in a house like this one day.

- (Y/N)

If you loved him so much, why did you let him go then when you had all these plans with him? Even if he tried to understand, he just didn’t.

“Don’t give up just yet when she told you to.”

“Are you just saying this or something?”

“Well, Princess Diana passed this message on but after everything, I believe that she’s right.” Sanghoon gave his opinion, but Jeno was reluctant to accept it.

“I never got a proper explanation why she suddenly changed her mind, Sanghoon.” He ranted, raking his hand through his hair from puzzlement. “Did I do something wrong?”

Sanghoon pitied him, having the upper hand and questioning himself whether to reveal the truth. However, since this boy took the job, he’s succumbed to secrecy. Without any transparency, it could drive someone mad. He’s too young for that, so Sanghoon breathed in defeat and placed his hand on Jeno’s shoulder.

“Promise me you won’t be mad when I tell you because I was when I found out; almost screamed even.”

Jeno nodded, listening to whatever Sanghoon had to say.

Of all people, he never would’ve expected Athena to do such a brash thing. Someone he respected and trusted, only to betray him by doing something she believed was good for all. Except it wasn’t, and it ended up hurting you all these years. The woman he loved, now he’s a clearer understanding of why you did what you did. Yet, it can’t fix his excruciation.

Heartbroken was an understatement; he had no one to rely on. With Sanghoon, he finally had a proper breakdown. The older man could only comfort his quietly, picturing him like one of his sons going through a hard time in school. But if it involves the heart, it’ll take more time to recover.

“You’re always the one adjusting, Jeno. But I think this time, you’re the one who needs space.”

A Year and a Half Later

“Jeno Lee!!!” Jaemin roughly wallowed his best friend in a hug when he arrived in their dorm room for the first time in a long time. “You dyed your hair blonde again!”

Renjun, who was behind the two of them, only rolled his eyes as he helped carry Jeno’s bags. “God damn it, Jaemin! You’re supposed to be helping me first!”

“I know, but give me a few seconds! I’m just happy our group is back together!”

Jeno laughed at his friends’ annoying yet silly dynamics, giddy to be back home. For a year, Jeno spent his 3rd year of university in Rome, Italy after one of his professors brought up to him about a scholarship program there for his course. At the time where he needed a change of scenery, he sent his application form and got interviewed.

Acing it, he had the opportunity to fly across the world to study and travel. His English skills surely improved, even picking up Italian words along the way due to a required class for it. He studied the history of different locations and how they were built.

He also went on field trips almost every day if it weren’t for the Italian students assigned to tour him around, academic and non-academic. Nights he spent on drinking wine on the rooftop of his dorm with them, screaming his complaints in the world with them.

It didn’t hit him that his stay was reaching its end until he submitted his final plate. His goodbye party didn’t even feel like one, but a see you later in the next few years after he becomes a licensed architect with money. His goal of it felt more realistic, motivating him to excel in his remaining years in university.

After unpacking half of his things, he was reminded of an email from one of the head professors, who requested another copy of his confidential documents from the Italian university he went to as soon as he’s back on campus.

He raced to the department with a folder of them and luckily encountered the said professor. Handing it to him, this professor questioned how he was and what experiences he gained from the trip. With excitement, Jeno spoke all sorts of tales from his adventures, highlighting how determined he was now to be an architect.

“That’s great to hear, Jeno!” He celebrated, checking on his watch, and widened his eyes. Frantic at his colliding schedules, he asked Jeno for a favor. It turned out that at the same time as his emergency meeting, he’s supposed to tour the new transferee student around campus.

“Only if you have time, Jeno! I could always ask another student, plus you just came back and need rest.”

“It’s not like I left for a decade, sir. No worries, I’ll do it.”

“Oh, bless your soul.” He put his hands together in prayer position, bowing back and forth with gratitude. “Wait, she’s right outside! Go ahead and introduce yourself.”

Jeno nodded, exiting right through the department doors. This girl had her back turned, inspecting her surroundings. She wore a black and white tweed blazer that matched with her skirt, black high heeled boots, and a black handbag. She must be a foreigner, Jeno thought.

“Excuse me, are you the transferee in the department of Architecture?”

Jeno didn’t brace himself for the surprise he’d face once this girl reacted to him calling her out. Her face was one he could never forget, no matter how many times he told himself to. The same face he convinced his heart to stop beating for, yet it lied.

This radiant face was none other than yours.

Jeno almost dropped his phone. He tried his best to hold on to your promise, but he failed. It was the main reason he studied abroad; to forget and focus on his career path. So the least thing he could’ve done was to study hard for his dream career.

Just a glimpse of you projected back every single memory you’ve had together. Beautiful yet heart-wrenching, he kept his emotions to himself.

You even wore the rose necklace he got you. Could it be?

“It’s been a while, Lee Jeno.” You took the metaphorical scissors to cut the tension, trying to contain the crushing feelings. The faculty center was a public place, yet it’s like the two of you were on the main stage.

“Do you remember me?” Astounded, you nodded. Every single detail.

Jeno could’ve ran away, but didn’t. He could’ve left you hanging, but didn’t. He can no longer count how many times you’ve appeared in his dreams, only to be disappointed when morning comes to not have you in his arms. He took one step closer, taking his time.

“How do you know me?”

“You’re the boy whom I helped with his assignment, argued with me over Romeo and Juliet,” You mimicked his move, making you one step nearer to him. “And most of all, the boy I once gave my entire heart to.”

Another step, leaving a few inches between the two of you. His heart palpitated without caffeine. What if he was napping in his dorm again? It was all surreal. “Is it really you, (Y/N)?”

Hearing your name from his lips lowered your guard, you pleased him with a hopeful grin. “I’d be dust by now if I didn’t drink Circe’s potion, right?”

That’s where Jeno unchained himself from his emotions. He engulfed in a warm hug, one that has no plans to let go when his chin planted on your shoulder. You returned the gesture, dropping all your worries away along with your bag and papers as your arms snaked through his neck.

You knew you had to part ways for a while after everything, though you were unsure how he’d feel about it. You recalled every time he visited you after his job ended up until his intense chat with Sanghoon, where he bawled his heart out. You couldn’t take it anymore after trying to stay strong, crying as soon as you woke up that night.

All your fellow figures could do was soothe you down like before to the best of their abilities, yet this time, it was unsuccessful. You’re filled with misery, realizing later how much of a big mistake you’ve made.

You’ve isolated yourself again for a while, but less rudeness and more silence. It was until Circe visited you. She doesn’t like getting involved with drama, though now was different. She, alongside Hera and Aphrodite, couldn’t withstand you tolerating the heartbreak again. So they went behind Athena’s back on this one time and created a potion together just for you. But with a compromise.

“This potion can turn you into a human. However, there’s only a 10% chance you’ll regain all your memories from this place.”

“So I’ll forget everyone and him?”

“Yes, unfortunately.” You’re about to shoo her away, not in the mood to do something drastic as that. But Circe grabbed your arm again. “I strongly believe that if you and he meant to be, then there will come a time these past memories will suddenly surge at you.”

“Must I need to forget to live properly?”

You’re stubborn, and Circe expected it. “You’ve broken so many golden rules, (Y/N), so it must be done. I’ve gone against Athena for this potion, and rarely have I done that. So rather than wallowing up in misery, you should focus on yourself. Do what makes you happy because this place is trapping you from every great thing out there.”

Those were the word that the actual (Y/N) (Y/L/N) lived by, nevertheless, you’re unique from her. You built a separate identity from her. “But Jeno-”

“At the right time, (Y/N). Pull yourself together and do all the things you’ve dreamt of before he came into the picture. I just know he loves you that much, and that he will wait for you.”

That same night, you gathered all your senses and drank it. The transition was fast as lightning speed, and behold, you were like a new person. You’re back in London, with a family that closely resembled your former one; only 3 older siblings, making you the youngest. You also had a new set of memories, from childhood until your adult years.

From (Y/N) (Y/L/N), you became (Y/N) Edwards.

It took one drunken night out with your university friends for the unlikely surge of old memories to speedily hit through your intoxicated state. Way beyond a dream, you’ve dropped your shot glass and broke down in the bathroom of your dorm room. You left something unaccomplished, and you had to do something before it’s too late.

Thus, you rushed to Seoul thanks to your parents’ support as they agreed that exploring outside your home country was a great experience. The only excuse you gave to your friends for the sudden transfer was you finding a new calling.

Sure, studying abroad was an exciting thing but you’re more determined to reunite with him. Even if this encounter was unforeseen, it was bound to happen one day. It so turned out that you had the same major in your former university and this new one.

Head to toe, you remembered everything.

“I’m so sorry I took so long.” You cradled your head on his chest, unaware of how your new life left Jeno so troubled.

“That doesn’t matter anymore.” Jeno tightened his grip, scared of releasing you again. Those two years felt like a breath of fresh air and a punch in the gut. “I tried to live up to your last wish, but I really can’t.”

“I want to take that wish back, Jeno. I wasn’t thinking right and only ended putting you through so much.”

“Oh, angel. I slowly understood why you did it.” Before he got too fragile, he softened his grip on you and showed his face again to you. He wanted a better look at his pretty girl, his fingers brushing strands of your hair behind your ear. Heart-fluttering, you bit your bottom lip. “What would you want to wish for instead?”

“Instead of you letting me go, I wish you could take me back and love me again. I can’t undo the past, but I’d still like to think I’ve tried my best.” That was the only wish you could ever think of. As huge as it was, it was something he may not accept. Yet you gave it a go, risking it all. “I don’t deserve you at all, Jeno.”

“Don’t say that, (Y/N).” One of his hands grabbed yours, putting it on his cheek. Cupping it, “I’ve never stopped loving you, you know.”

Oh, love. An all-too familiar emotion that either makes or breaks you. Of all the times you could’ve said those words, you held back, especially that wretched night you two broke it off. Although you showed it, being able to say it to someone felt more empowering.

This was finally the chance you’ve unconsciously waited for.

“I’m stupid for not saying this sooner.”

“What is it?”

With intimate eye contact, you drowned in the comfort of his brown orbs. You trusted him then, and you trusted him now. “I love you, Lee Jeno.”

Secretly, Jeno anticipated for the day you’d say those meaningful 3 words. Just like you, he showed more affection through actions than words. He only admitted when he lost you, and never would he do the same mistake again. If he felt that the love was strongly present, he will say it aloud.

“I love you still, (Y/N).” His arm around your waist tugged you in further. “I loved you as (Y/N) (Y/L/N) and I will continue to love you as (Y/N) Edwards.”

He peeked on your ID earlier, but regardless, he stood by his truth. You’re still the same (Y/N).

Finally, he closed the limited space between your lips. The memories of your past romance replayed in sync of every touching kiss, popping one leg up like in the movies. The Princess Diaries, specifically. Like in the museum from your unbearable parting, one warm tear freed itself down your cheek.

The sweetness of being reunited with you again beat the torturous wait of Jeno. Time really made your hearts grow fonder. As everyone said, if the love between two people is real, then it’ll find its way back to each other.

The world must be on your side too because no professor called you two out on your public display of affection. Jeno pecked your lips one time before stepping away, picking up the things you dropped.

“Now come on, I have to tour you around as instructed.”

You stomped on your feet, rolling your eyes from being left hanging. He’s still the same tease from before. “After that kiss though, I would’ve thought we could reschedule it.”

“No can do, Edwards.” Passing over your things, he wrapped one arm around you as he escorted you out of the building. The university was huge, with more buildings and green fields surrounded everywhere. “Left or right? There are a lot of places you missed out on all those years.”

“Point taken. Then you lead the way, my love.”

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doyumacy · 4 years ago

Text

𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲?

𝙜𝙞𝙛 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙚

𝗷𝗲𝗻𝗼 𝘅 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝘅 𝗷𝗮𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗻

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘂𝗮𝗴𝗲, 𝘀𝗺𝘂𝘁 (𝘂𝗻𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗲𝘅, 𝗼𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝘀𝗲𝘅 𝗺 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳. 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴) 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘀𝘁

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 𝟰,𝟳𝗸

hello i read a lot of your works and i think theyre really good. i was hoping to request for a jeno×reader×jaemin. now, not a threesome, thats not what i mean. but like maybe the reader is dating one and the other secretly likes her too and idk i think just angsty smutty and yk all that. she can end up with anyone tbh.

𝗶 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗹𝘆, 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝘆 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀.

𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗲?

𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗱𝗿𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗮𝗻𝗲.

Jeno and you have been together for around 2 years, and many people believe Jaemin is also dating you two since the three of you are practically always together. You don't really mind since you like him and is nice being around him.

You occasionally find him staring at you or checking you out when you wear sexy clothes, and you don't pay attention to it since boys do that all time, right? You also don't mind him checking you out because you surely have checked him out as well.

And he's handsome.

Very handsome.

Jeno and Jaemin have been friends for a few years and even share an apartment, so it's not unusual seeing Jaemin there. Of course, he kind of knows when things get steamy and always leave the place so you and Jeno can have a bit of privacy.

One night, you arrive at their apartment wearing a short silk black dress and black jacket covering your shoulders. Jaemin is quick to open the door and smiles when he sees you. "Hey."

"Hi," you grin. "Is Jeno home yet?"

He shakes his head and sets aside to let you in. "He texted me he'll be here in 15 minutes."

You groan and Jaemin shuts the door behind you. "Jeno is always late." Jaemin fixes his gaze on your butt and then clears his throat.

"You want to drink something?" Jaemin asks as he walks to the kitchen.

You nod. "A beer please."

You take your jacket off and place it on the armchair. "You're not going out with us tonight?"

Jaemin is back holding two beer bottles and hands one to you. "No, I have class tomorrow at 7 am and I know you guys won't be back until 3 am."

You giggle and have a sip of beer. "Maybe tomorrow we can hang out," you proposed as you sit. You cross your leg.

Jaemin gulps at the image of you with that short silk dress, half of your legs naked. So hot.

The fuck am I thinking? Stop.

Jaemin sits in front of you and nods. "That's what Jeno said."

You stay quiet for a couple of seconds and then look at him. "It would've been fun if you were coming."

Jaemin is sure his heart will jump out of his chest at your words. Why are you saying that?

Dude, you're his friend. Don't overreact.

Jaemin smiles sideways. "Maybe if you give me a reason to skip my class I can go."

You smirk. "Let me think of something," you purse your lips as if thinking. "You could meet someone tonight."

Jaemin chuckles and shakes his head. "Not enough."

You sigh and squint your eyes, looking at him. "I'm trying to decipher what could make you go."

"Maybe if a girl with a black silken dress dances with me, I'll go," he says as he stares at you.

You thoughtlessly bite your lip and nod with your head. "Then I better get ready."

(...)

At the club, you have been by Jeno's side all night. And you know you owe a Jaemin a dance but you couldn't dance with him the way you want to since Jeno and a few more friends are there.

You sigh internally. Why are you thinking of Jaemin when you're practically grinding on Jeno? Maybe it's because he looks so damn good in that red shirt. Or perhaps you have had enough alcohol.

"Baby," you whisper to Jeno, "I'm gonna go to the restroom."

"You want me to go with you?" He asks.

You shake your head. "I'll be right back."

He kisses you before you and you walk among the people dancing. Once you're in the restroom, you wash your hands with cold water and you get your face a little wet.

You exhale.

Out of the corner of your eye you see the bathroom door open and you ignore it, thinking it is a girl. You raise your head up to watch yourself in the mirror and startle when you see Jaemin behind you.

"Jaemin!" You turn around. "What are you doing here?"

"You owe me a dance," he cocks an eyebrow at you.

"I'm not gonna dance with you in the restroom," you shake your head.

"I had other things in my mind," he stares at your lips.

Jaemin is drunk, like, super drunk.

"Like w-what?" You almost whisper when you feel your hips trapped against the sink. He has his arms on each side of the sink.

Jaemin laughs in response. "Don't play innocent with me. You've been watching me all night."

"Your... hair looks nice pushed back," you bite your lip

Jaemin looks at you in the eye. Your gaze flickered over his face, his eyes, his cheeks, his nose. Over to his mouth. There are just one thing you have forbidden yourself to think about. And that thing is Na Jaemin.

Something about this situation tells you that all the pent up feelings are going to escalate into something you are going to regret bitterly. But right now, you couldn't care less.

"Yeah?" Jaemin presses his hips against yours.

"Yes," you say breathless. "I kind of want to pull it."

"Well," he starts planting kisses on your neck. "I want you, I want to be close to you, to touch you, to fuck you..." he whispers in your ear. His hot breath hit your cheek, and you gasp as Jaemin runs his tongue along your jaw. Jaemin grabs your waist and pushes you back until your back is up against the wall. You shudder. Jaemin one then thrust his hips up once against your crotch, and you get goosebumps all over your body. "Fuck you until you can't move the next day," he murmurs, biting your earlobe, hard.

"I don't think you know who you're talking about," You force out.

"I think I do."

"And I think I want you to fuck off."

"I don't think you do. I am not in the mood to wait any longer."

"I can hear myself saying yes to that."

Jaemin rolls his eyes and sighs. "Oh, please, stop this act, you've been undressing me with your eyes every day for who knows how long."

"If you think you can have it the easy wa-"

Jaemin cuts you off. "I think a dick in your obsequious little mouth would shut you u-..."

But you already grab Jaemin's black hair and pull him in for a passionate kiss to shut his mouth up. Jaemin kisses back with force, shoves his tongue eagerly into your mouth, licks into it, hot and messy, and his lips tastes spicy and wonderful and that is all you can think of as Jaemin's hard, hot body pressed against your own, pinning you against the cold wall in your back, and you push your hands under his shirt, his fingers tracing the hard muscles of his back while Jaemin's lips caresses your neck.

Suddenly there is a knock at the door.

You share a look, slowly entangling themselves from each other in an instant, breathing heavily, hearts racing. "y/n? Are you okay in there, baby?" Jeno's worried voice.

"Y-yes!" You say. "I'll be out in a minute!"

(...)

It’s been a couple of days since the restroom event and you haven't had the guts to face Jaemin, and apparently neither does he. But you're sure about one thing: not telling Jeno because things will end up horribly and that’s the last thing you want.

When you’re done doing your homework, you get up from your chair and go to the kitchen where your friend Heejin is making dinner. “Are you making spaghetti?”You ask.

“Yeah,” she smiles. “Can you pass me the salt, please?”

You grab the salt and pass it to her. Little does she know you're being too loud. “Whats up?”

“Huh?” You look at her.

“Something’s wrong, what is it?” Heejin inquiries.

You purse your lips. “I’m going to hell.”

Heejin chuckles. “It’s been clear, but why?”

“Screw you,” you giggle and then sigh. “I kind of made out with Jaemin nights ago…”

“What?!” Heejin drops the spoon and stares at you. “Na Jaemin? Jaemin as Jeno’s friend?”

“Why do you have to remind me he’s friends with Jeno?!” You groan and run a hand through your hair.

“You my friend, are going to hell alive,” Heejin laughs. “How was it?”

“So good,” you whine. “I can’t get him off my head, Heejin.”

Heejin whistles. “Then go for it.”

“Are you insane?!” You stare at her. “What kind of friend are you?”

“A lousy one,” Heejin shrugs. “I mean, I kinda get you? He’s fine. If I were you I’d have sucked him off time ago.”

“I’m gonna go and pretend this conversation didn't happen,” you say.

(...)

You know Jeno is not home and you don't know why you are standing in front of his apartment door. Maybe it’s because you know Jaemin is home.

You exhale and turn on your heels to leave when the door suddenly opens. You curse internally.

Jaemin is wearing black sweatpants and a white sweater. His hair is messy and he looks even hotter. He frowns when he sees you. “y/n? what are you doing here?”

“Ah…” You try to come up with something, “I left my charger here and I need it, but Jeno’s not home so I’m leaving.”

“You know Jeno is not home at this hour every Wednesday,” he leans against the doorframe and smiles. “Were you looking for me?”

You hiss. “No.”

Jaemin chuckles and crosses his arms over his chest, still leaning against the doorframe. “Wanna come in?”

No. “Yes.”

Jaemin steps aside so you can get in and as you do, you gulp. You’re there for a reason and as much as you denied it to yourself, you can’t resist Jaemin and his lovely charms.

You feel Jaemin hands on your shoulders and you sigh at his touch. “You seem stressed.”

“You’re making me stressed,” you murmur.

Jaemin slightly laughs. “Why am I the only guilty here?”

“Because you’re the one taking advantage,” you hiss.

“You can go, you know? Door’s unlocked,” Jaemin grabs your hair and moves it aside leaving your neck uncovered and he kisses the back of your neck.

You choke a moan and turn on your heels so you can kiss him. Jaemin's mouth molds perfectly against yours, a soft sigh leaving you as he falls into the pit of longing and craving and all over desire.

Fuck this feels so good and it's just a kiss.

You grips Jaemin's sides beneath his sweater, letting your nails dig into his soft skin as he pulls you closer. You don't mean to let out the shocked noise you did when Jaemin pushes his tongue into your mouth. It seems to edge you on more and you tangle your tongue with Jaemin.

A weird mix of a pained gasp and a pleasured moan leaves your lips as he pulls away from you.

Jaemin's hand runs down the curve of your spine, slowly spreading over your ass before squeezing making you jump.

He presses a rough kiss to your parted lips, nipping at your bottom lip as he pulls away. You groan softly at all of the sensations you are feeling.

“You okay with this?” Jaemin asks.

“Yes.” You breathe out, hoping the one worded consent is enough for Jaemin to just keep going and touch you.

Jaemin roughly kisses you again, pulling you out of the room before your lips can even break apart.

You let yourself be dragged into his room. The door slams, Jaemin is all over you, hands wandering your body like they’re lost and searching for something.

You take it upon yourself to kiss Jaemin this time, surprising him slightly. Jaemin instantly melts against you though as you fall into each other and lick into each other’s mouths like it's all you can do.

Jaemin pulls away to breathe and his hands grip the hem of your shirt as he kisses your neck, “Can this come off?”

You are already pulling the shirt over your head. You kiss him back. "Your turn."

Jaemin smirks. "Remove it."

You grab his shirt in your fists and yanks it off of him, messing up his hair. You can't even think a coherent thought, Jaemin is beautiful.

He presses his chest to yours as he leans in to kiss your neck. Jaemin sinks his teeth into the sensitive skin beneath your ear and you almost fall to the ground as you gasp.

You lose control as Jaemin licks and sucks into your skin. Your glorious, warm, beautiful skin that Jaemin has wanted to touch for so long.

Your hands move to shakily mess with the hem of his sweatpants, Jaemin sinks his teeth into your shoulder and groans when he feels your hands brush against his dick. Jaemin presses opened mouth kisses to your neck and collarbones, breathing heavily against your skin as your hands push his sweatpants down.

Jaemin kicks them off and to the side, his skin felt hot all over and you are just so eager to touch him.

You feel your belt being pulled from the loops in your jeans as Jaemin kisses your jaw. You move back to look him in the eyes, crashing his lips back to his as he unbuttons your jeans. Once they were on the floor, Jaemin smiles looking at your black laced panties. "Someone came prepared."

"Shut up," you blush.

"Make me," he challenges you.

You kneel down and it surprises him when you remove his boxers. "Love," he calls and you shush him while fisting his growing member. Jaemin closes his eyes shut when you lick the side of his cock, biting his lip to prevent a series of groans to emerge.

You give the tip a lick, kissing it as it oozes precum. "Love." Jaemin calls once again, looking down on you. Damn, you look so hot kneeling in front of him like that.

"Yes, Jaemin?" You smile at him.

"Don't tease," Jaemin warns.

You wink at him before doing the deed.

Your mouth is really hot or maybe because his cock is really sensitive but it feels so good that groans escapes his lips. You suck his cock, playing with it inside your mouth and even fondling his balls. Jaemin's hands reaches for your hair, tugging it in a ponytail as he bobs your head up and down on his cock. Jaemin hisses, badly wishing his control wouldn't spill out, but with a mouth so good like this how can he not fuck your mouth?

"Baby, you're so fucking good." He compliments as the hold on your hair gets tighter. You swallow his cock, deepthroating him that makes him groan. "Oh God, y/n." And that is it, his control going down the drain. He thrusts into your mouth with so much power. He keeps on groaning as he fuck you mouth and feels himself cumming in no time. His cum fills your mouth, swallowing it.

When Jaemin comes back from his high, he gives you a mischievous smile as he grabs your chin with two fingers. "Open up," you open your mouth and he checks you have swallowed everything. "Good girl."

He pushes you to the bed and his mouth kisses your stomach and you moan. "Jaemin..." You call. Jaemin doesn't stop his adventure of going down until he is at the waistband of your panties "Fuck, Jaemin." And you know what will happen now that he is pulling down your underwear.

His tongue immediately licks your clit and you moan, arching your back at the sensation. Jaemin part your legs and starts fucking you with his tongue, making you scream in pleasure. His thumb starts circling your clit as he alternates the sucking and licking of your pussy. You can feel your soul being sucked by Jaemin’s mouth. And yes, that's how amazing he is. You come in no time, letting him suck everything.

He grins while rubbing his mouth using the back of his hand and that gesture looks so sexy, so deadly. "Oh, God. Just fuck me," you exclaim that made him smirk.

Jaemin gives his cock a few strokes and positioned it on your entrance, making you nod. His cock sinks inside you and he groans at how tight you are. He starts jerking into you violently.

You can feel your body being thrown to bed with each thrust and his cock hitting you in the pleasure spot. With the way that he is going, you are sure you'd get so sore the next day.

"Jaemin!" You shout as one hand grabs the sheets of his bed and the other scratches his back, wanting something to claw on. He is jerking into you real hard that you can hear his balls slamming against your skin.

"Yes, fuck baby." he curses while jerking in you in such power and speed, driving both their orgasms. You come with a mind rippling orgasm and immediately feel him filling you up.

“Fuck,” you whisper, panting.

Jaemin is panting on your neck and then rolls over next to you. “That was g-”

“Great,” you finish, staring at the roof. “Oh shit.”

“What?” He looks at you.

“Wanna repeat?”

“Fuck yeah.” Jaemin smirks. “Roll on your stomach, baby,” he orders.

(...)

You didn’t mean to.

That’s what you tell yourself as you take the walk of shame home.

You didn’t mean to.

You can’t even look at Jeno, you don’t know how to speak to Jeno, your heart breaks every time he texts you. You are the shittiest and you know he doesnt deserve what you did.

Your guilt weighs down your shoulders. You feel like shit and you know Jeno will be devastated if he ever finds out. You and Jaemin are his favorite people in this world. Your poker face will be the first giveaway. And you remind yourself to forget what happened.

You sigh in exasperation, running your hands through your hair, chewing on your lip. You are looking for someone to blame. You want to pin it all on Jaemin, scream at him for making it happen. But it wasn’t just him. You are too.

You swear to yourself that it won’t happen again.

Until... it happens.

“Fuck,” you pant, “we can’t keep doing this.”

“I know,” Jaemin rolls off of you and lays next to you.

“But it’s just so good,” you sigh, leaning down on your elbows.

“You are so good,” Jaemin stares at you.

You chuckle. “Shut up and leave.”

“I feel used,” Jaemin complains, getting off the bed looking for his clothes.

“Poor ba-” A knock on the door interrupts you both and you frown.

“Are you waiting for someone?”

You shake your head and then your eyes wide open when you hear Jeno’s voice outside. “Fuck,” you whisper, almost jumping off the bed. “Shit, shit… okay, uhm… he knows I’m home because my car’s downstairs. Shit Jaemin…”

“I’ll just hide…” He takes a look at your room. “Under your bed.”

You put on some clothes and nod at his idea. Once Jaemin is under your bed, you leave your room and go to open the door. Your boyfriend is wearing his brightest smile. “Sorry for not telling you I was coming but I just missed you.” He pouts.

You gulp.

You’re a piece of shit.

“I miss you, too,” you manage to say and smile. “But I was on my way out.”

“Oh damn,” he sighs. “I was hoping we could spend the day together.”

“We can,” you smile. “But not here, Heejin has someone in her bedroom.”

“Let’s go to my place then,” he kisses your forehead. “Jaemin’s gone.”

You smirk and nod.

(...)

“It can’t happen again, Jaemin,” you sigh when his lips kiss your neck.

You’re laying on your back on Jaemin’s bed. For the third time in the week. You don't know why (yes you do) you keep coming back to him.

He hums, continuing kissing your neck and sometimes nipping at it. “You look really pretty today,” his fingers the hem of your dress.

“I-I’m meeting Jeno later,” you stammer.

“He can keep on waiting,” he whispers in your ear and bites your earlobe.

As you look up at him, he brings something over your eyes. Something soft, silky. A scarf? His sleep-mask? What is it? You don’t think about it anymore, as he caresses your body. “I wanna try something.”

His fingers flit over you, a soft touch here at your cheek, a kiss there by your hip. You moan, softly, inaudibly. But Jaemin hears it, of course he does. His low chuckle tells you that he hears it. You feel the bed shift, and his breath is suddenly warm on your face as he whispers against your ear, “Not yet, baby. Not yet.” The bed shifts again, an absence of breath that isn’t yours, and something wet touches your peaked breast, causing you to gasp.

His tongue.

You groan, your back arching, attempting to force more contact, any sort of contact. Jaemin places a hand on your shoulder and pushes, you resist momentarily, but eventually sink back into the bed, waiting. Always waiting. His hands are on your thighs now, massaging the soft flesh there. So close, but so far. You’re wetter now, if that’s even possible. Not knowing what he will do makes you ache with need.

Jaemin holds back, shifting between your legs, placing them around his waist. But even then, he is not done. He isn’t even undressed. You mewl in frustration, and there’s that laugh again. It’s so frustrating, and you try to gyrate against him, to feel some part of your lover against your core. Against you.

Your clit grazes a seam on Jaemi’s jeans causing you to buck your hips, ecstatic at the contact, but when you attempt to go back to it, it’s gone. He holds himself away from you. And then suddenly he is gone from between your thighs, punishing you it would seem with the far off sound of a zipper, a whisper of denim dropping to the floor. You whimper, missing his presence, and a soft plea escapes your lips. “Please?”

“Beg. Beg for it, baby girl.” His voice is almost a purr, so close to your ear but there’s no tell-tale mist of breath.

You groan. “Jaemin!”

“Good girls ask for it,” he bites your earlobe.

You sigh. “Please just fuck me.”

Jaemin smirks and plants a kiss on your lips. “Okay.”

(...)

You end up seeing Jaemin at least twice a week for the past 2 months, and whenever Jeno asks you where you are, you reply by saying you’re busy with uni stuff. And Jeno is not stupid, he knows something’s off with you, but he decides to give yous some space because you might be going through something and when you need him, you eventually will talk to him.

But more days pass and he knows what is happening.

He knows it because he knows you so well, because there are details so huge Jeno can’t keep ignoring.

Your guilty expression, for starters.

And a different smell on your skin, the smell that perhaps he is the only one to catch, but can’t go away. And Jeno has an idea of who that smell belongs to.

So, one night Jeno gets inside of the apartment aware of what might be happening.

Jeno sees your clothes all over the place and he perfectly hears your moans coming from Jaemin’s room, which door is slightly open. He swallows and walks quietly just to see you on top of his best friend. His girlfriend fucking his best friend.

He returns to the living room and sits there, having to listen to your moans and your cries of pleasure. After a few minutes, the torture is gone and all he can hears in your panting breaths, and the next Jeno sees is Jaemin and you leaving his room. You’re wearing one of Jaemin’s shirt and your panties.

You two freeze when you see Jeno, sitting on the couch staring at you both. “Nothing to say?” He asks, challenging.

You gulp and open your mouth but you can't articulate words.

Jeno stands up and runs a hand through his hair. “The writing’s always been on the wall. Everyone warned me about how Jaemin looked at you but I ignored it because he was my friend.”

“Jeno…” Jaemin starts talking.

“And I just found you fucking my girlfrined,” Jeno laughs bitterly and looks at you. “And you, how could you do this to me, y/n? I love you!”

You slowly look up and you can see the tears in his eyes. Your heart rate returns as it begins to pound in your chest, tears formed in your eyes but refuse to let them fall.

Jaemin can’t bring himself to look at Jeno so he keeps his eyes to the floor. Jeno paces back and forth, trying to think but all he thinks is hurtful words. You want to explain yourself but you know Jeno won't let you speak.

“I’m sorry, Jeno,” you whisper.

“How long?” He stares at you. “How long have you two been fucking?”

You two still cannot look at him and you sigh. “Answer me!”

“Two months…” Jaemin replies.

Jeno nods, turns around and crosses the room picking up his jacket. As he pulls the jacket on, he catches sight of your face. Tears are streaming down your cheeks. “Don’t fucking cry.”

As Jeno walks to the door, he turns to see Jaemin. "I'm staying at Mark’k,I want your crap out of my place by tonight and I dont ever want to see your fucking face,” he says and looks at you. “Same goes for you.”

“Jeno, please let me expl-” you try to say.

Jeno throws the door open and marches into the hall. The door slams shut behind him. He marched down the hall and into the stairwell. He takes the stairs two at a time until he reaches the lobby. For a moment, he isn’t sure where to go next. Maybe to the nearest bar and get drunk until he erases your face from his memory.

(...)

It has been 8 weeks since the last time you see Jeno or Jaemin. Jaemin hasn't stopped texting you or calling and to be honest you don't wanna see him, but you miss him.

And there is something you cannot explain, why do you miss Jaemin so much?

You know you’re the worst person in the world right now. You destroyed their friendship and probably destroyed Jeno’s life.

You sigh getting up from your bed. Your head hurts from thinking too much and you can’t find an answer to one single question. Heejin won’t help and probably can’t call Mark or Donghyuck since they will stand with Jeno. They must hate you right now.

More days pass and you realize that Jeno has changed his class schedule and even his teachers so as not to go into the same classes with you.

As you’re leaving the campus, you spot Jaemin walking to his car. Oh, you want to talk to him so bad.

He looks as bad as you.

You don't know how but your legs start making their way to Jaemin. He notices you and he seems to tense up. You stand in front of him and say nothing. He lowers his head and sighs, then he’s quick. He pulls you closer for a hug. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” he whispers.

You wrap your arms around his waist and snuggle into his neck. “I miss you.”

“I miss you, too,” he kisses your forehead. “What are we doing?”

“I don’t know,” you reply. “This is so wrong, Jaemin. We shouldn't be doing this.”

“I know,” he cups your face, “but I can’t stop thinking of you. This is not okay, y/n. We fucked up.”

You can feel the tears streaming down your face. “We should stop seeing each other.”

“Yes,” Jaemin murmurs, “but I don’t want to.”

“Jaemin,” you sob.

Jaemin kisses you. You love how heavenly his lips feel against yours, how his warm touch is hot and it sends electricity coursing through your veins.

“Let me take you on a date. Let’s do things correctly this time,” Jaemin rubs your right cheek.

You know it’s selfish, but deep down you know you developed feelings for him. And so he did.

You nod. “We’ll go slow, okay?”

Jaemin kisses your cheek and smiles. “I promise.”

You don't know how the rest of the guys will react, or if you two will work out, but you are willing to give it a shot. To try.

#jeno smut #jeno x reader #jeno imagine #jaemin smut #jaemin x reader #jaemin imagine #nct dream x reader #nct dream #na jaemin #lee jeno #nct dream smut

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nctsjiho · 4 years ago

Text

Explode

warnings: there’s 2 swear words in there and it’s a bit angsty this one

❀ There’s some unexplained tension between the 6 youngest members of Dream and JiHo

A bunch of testosterone and very strong-willed men was a recipe for occasional conflicts. Getting into fights with your friends was never fun. It was even worse when that friend was someone you had to work with, live with and see everyday. It happened from time to time that the boys butted heads, but usually it was a very dumb and small problem which got resolved before the end of the day. (Often because other members got involved to tell them their problem was just dumb and nothing worth fighting over.)

This time however seemed like a very different situation. It wasn’t a small fight between the two youngest members about a dance move. It also wasn’t someone who was jealous of another member because they forgot about hangout plans to chill with someone else. No this time seemed a lot more serious. The older boys watched as the room filled with tension. JiHo had just walked in, not even saying as much as a hi or giving a smile. It wasn’t like her and before anyone had to ask anything they sensed the second source of the tension. The 6 youngest Dream members were all sitting together, blank to annoyed facial expressions and most uncharacteristically, not even one of them was talking.

The older boys were all exchanging questioning looks, but it was evident that no one knew what was going on. They even looked at Mark, hoping that if anyone, he’d be the one to know what was going on since he was a member of Dream after all, but alas. He seemed the most dumbfounded of them all.

Taeyong was about to speak up, but before he could one of their managers walked in, ready to brief them on their upcoming schedules.

Once the meeting was over everyone made their way over to the biggest practise room. JiHo had settled on the couch next to Kun and Yangyang, quickly putting her airpods in her ears, a clear sign she didn’t want to engage in any conversation. Since JiHo wasn’t going to talk the older boys thought that they could try prying some information out of the Dreamies. Not wanting to step on anyone’s toes though, they all agreed that Mark should talk to the boys.

He carefully approached the boys who had been talking amongst themselves and sat down in between Jisung and Jaemin. They made some small talk before Mark carefully brought up the subject. “So, did something perhaps happen? With- you know? With-...” Haechan scoffed, trying his hardest not to roll his eyes before standing up and turning to his backpack to find his bottle of water. Mark tried making eye contact with Jisung and Renjun who avoided it as if their lives depended on it. The other 3 boys just shrugged when Mark looked at them with Jeno starting to play with the strings of his hoodie.

Mark stood up defeated and went to report his lack of information to Taeyong. They decided to leave it at that for a little since neither party was going to talk and they still had a long day to go. Imagine what it would be like if their petty stare down evolved into a huge fight.

It had neared 3 pm. The members had been practising for about 2 and a half hours before they got their break. JiHo had seemed to become a lot less tense but Taeyong decided not to act on it yet. He had recruited Lucas, Johnny, Taeil and Hendery to come with him to the convenience store and grab snacks and drinks for everyone with the hopes that it would brighten up the mood and give everyone some more energy for the coming hours of practise.

What he didn’t expect was that on his arrival back at the practise room, a whole bomb would have exploded. Accusations were thrown around, and glares were being sent out. Yuta and Jaehyun were holding JiHo back while Kun, Ten, Mark and Yangyang stood by the Dreamies, Doyoung standing in the middle like some kind of referee. The other members standing off to the side, not wanting to intervene.

You’d might ask why 2 men had to hold a tiny girl back. Well Taeyong was confused as well, until he walked closer to see the deadly stares of the girl. He wondered how the younger boys hadn’t given up on yelling yet, one of those looks in Taeyong’s direction and he’d apologise straight away, even if it wasn’t his fault. JiHo was unarguably the scariest when angry, but the Dreamies were notorious for being stubborn and talkative, not backing down in the slightest.

“-if she would stop talking behind people’s backs!” Renjun had yelled. The boys who just walked in didn’t have a clue about what already had been said prior or what had ticked them off to start fighting right then and there, but their main goal now was to resolve the problem. “Oh what would you know?” JiHo scoffed, but Doyoung came to interject. “What did she say then?” “Why don’t you ask her!” Haechan argued causing Doyoung to groan. “I asked you didn’t I?” “I don’t even know what I did to get you guys so pissed of at me.” The girl was calm. Eerily calm and it send shivers down Jaehyun and Yuta’s spines who were standing next to her.

“Sure you don’t!” Haechan chuckled, not that he found it funny, he just couldn’t believe JiHo was feigning innocence right now. She rolled her eyes before turning around and walking over to the couch in the back of the room. She plopped down on it and pushed her head back against the back of the couch, her hands coming up to slowly massage her temples.

“Can someone explain-” “How dare you call Jisung a fake maknae and talk bad about him behind his back?” Jaemin had finally spoken up, his voice low. This comment shocked everyone. No way JiHo did something like that right? But before they could say anything Haechan fired another comment. “And say how Mark shouldn’t be in Dream anymore, because you’re just jealous that you’re not in Dream with us.” “Yeah! It’s not our fault you’re not getting any songs-” “What the fuck did you just say? I dare you to finish that sentence Renjun.” JiHo stood up from her seat, malice lacing her every single word.

“Wow wow wow- Guys I can’t imagine JiHo saying anything like that. It must be a misunderstanding-” Doyoung said before he once again got interrupted by the Dream members. “It’s true! We heard her say it!” Jisung said, his voice starting to crack as tears brimmed in his eyes. “JiHo?” Doyoung looked at her with hopeful eyes. “Please let this be a misunderstanding.” He thought. “Is it my fault that I didn’t get any songs to promote then?” JiHo asked, looking at Renjun, completely ignoring the question.

“Is that what’s important right now?! Jisung is crying for goodness sake! And it’s all-” Chenle started yelling but Mark silenced him. “Why would I argue about something that isn’t true?” The girl said in almost a whisper before turning towards Renjun again. “So? Is it my fault? Jaemin here gets to perform Work It with Jisung, Haechan and Jeno have 90s Love and Haechan sings From Home with you and Chenle. You guys also have Déjà Vu. Yes, maybe I’m not as great of a signer as you, or as great as a dancer as Jisung, or as great as a rapper as Mark. Maybe it’s because I’m a girl. Maybe it’s because I shouldn’t have been in NCT in the first place. But is it my fault?” Her voice was so steady and calm, causing everyone in the room to become quiet.

They all stood there for a minute, before a sob leaves Jisung’s lips. Everyone turns to look at him, but JiHo turns to grab her phone and bag planning to leave. “JiHo, wait-” “I never. ever! Said anything like that about Jisung. What you probably heard was me telling Johnny how I’m feel like the fake maknae of NCT 127. How I felt like I, NCT 127′s maknae, am just a silly excuse for an idol, and how I took Haechan’s place, while he’s 100 times a better fit for the role than I am. Oh! And that about Mark, I never said he shouldn’t come back to Dream. I was talking about how worried I was for him to join another unit because he already is in almost all of them plus SuperM. I was talking about the unit Lee Soo Man has been planning for 2021. Who would I be to tell him what to do and not to do? And yes maybe I’m jealous of you guys, but I’m not the kind of person to go behind someone’s back and talk shit. But if that’s what you think of me please go ahead.” JiHo said before putting her belongings in her bag. “Also Jisung? Thanks for trusting in Haechan so much, saying that you all ‘heard me say it’ when it was only Haechan there eavesdropping on my conversation with Johnny. I’m really happy that knowing you for all these years has build this much trust between us.” She scoffed sarcastically.

As JiHo walked out of the room she got stopped by Taeyong. “JiHo, we still have practise-” “What’s there for me to practise? I’m not in any songs anyway.” She pushed herself through the boys at the doorway before making her way to the dorm, supposedly.

With JiHo gone the boys had looked over to Johnny who sighed deeply. “I don’t wanna say it, but you guys really messed up. Everything she said was true. She was only talking about herself, she never mentioned Jisung, besides when she said she was proud of him.” The comment had sent all the Dream members over the edge, their actions finally sinking in and the severity of their accusations very clear now.

They had never meant to be so hostile towards the girl, but when they thought she had been talking badly behind their backs about one of their members, and definitely since they thought it was about Jisung, they couldn’t help but get furious. They had such a close bond and felt protective over each other. Jisung had taken the news of JiHo badmouthing him very poorly and that sparked protectiveness over the youngest from the other members. But now that they found out about what was actually said they all felt sick to their stomachs. How could they have said such awful words to her when she was already talking badly about herself? And out of all member Haechan felt the worst. How was he ever going to make things right again? What were the consequences for his actions? And how bad were they going to be?

---

Part 2

#jiho.writings #nct 24th member #nct addition #nct dream angst #nct dream imagines #nct dream scenarios #nct female member #nct extra member #nct additional member #nct angst #nct additions #kpop!addition #kpop!oc

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lvlyhao · 4 years ago

Text

『you’re dating him but he’s not your bias』

reaction fic; NCT Dream

A/N: this is nct dream’s reaction to realizing your bias is not him (and you’re a couple). gender neutral, got way too deep at some points and was NOT meant to be this long. enjoy.

note that english is my second language and i speak mixing slang, accents and spellings from 3283928 places so i did notice there’s practice written with both s and c down there so

just dont mind it pls

also, today’s photo theme is dream looking cute in low quality shots.

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮𝓼: fluff (♡), angst (❆), comedy (☼), crack (⍢).

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: lots of swearing, my tough love for the neos, one mention of cheating that doesn’t actually happen, a couple of mentions of alcohol and drinking, some violence hidden in metaphors, me being chaotic, it got a bit more angsty and darker than i intended, but we do have all happy endings.

word count: 6.8K

pairing: nct dream members x reader ( includes mark, renjun, jeno, haechan, jaemin, chenle, jisung)

disclaimer: the characters in the story below do not reflect real people or present real facts. this is purely fictional, and you may not copy, change, translate or repost my work in any way. all rights reserved © cherry-hyejin 2021.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

Mark

oh, poor baby

i feel like he would be a little heartbroken

just a little

not so much if it’s someone from dream, because they’re his little brothers, but if it’s one of his hyungs from 127 or wayv,,,,,

boy might cry

he’s not super dramatic about it or anything but i don’t see him as being super confident about himself

so he might think like

“do they think he’s cooler than me?”

and it’s silly, yes, he knows

but it’s just something that pops up in his mind sometimes when you bring him up

so for the sake of this fanfic let’s pretend you’re johnny biased

because gods know i am

at least when it comes to 127

mark would be divided into fanboying with you and being like “YO, HE’S THE COOLEST GUY ON EARTH OH MY GOD I’M SO GLAD YOU AGREE”

and

“a h”

would constantly try to get closer to you when johnny is around, and just

showing off in little (kinda dumb) ways

complimenting you

being even more whipped than usual

like yes he’ll give you all of his watermelon slices just please don’t look at johnny like that again

i think johnny would kind of play into it with the whole “imma steal your s/o” thing

and he doesn’t do it to make mark jealous or hurt

we know he’d rather get hit by a train than ever actually upsetting his son on purpose

but we also know he’s johnny

cue “OH DUDE HE’S FLIRTING”

so yeah he might call you lil pet names (beautiful, cutie, you get it)

just to see you giggle

(and see your soul leave your body)

might say he’s taking you out for dinner when he’s just driving you to get more ice cream for a movie night with the gang lol

and winks

expect a lot of winks

anywhere and anytime

which makes mark sometimes feel like he’s intruding???

and that you appreciate johnny more than him???

he genuinely doesn’t understand how you can date him and still not have him as your bias

don’t you like, love him above everyone else or smth lol

his “showing off” phase eventually fades tho

now every time you hang you with the boys and johnny is around, he’ll be a bit more distant

he thinks he’s giving you space to interact with his friends but he’s just shying away from competing with one of his favourite people ever

and it’s a competition that Does Not Exist™

but he’s not 100% aware of that

and you’re not that dense

so ofc you notice

and you wait till you two are alone to talk to him, and he BEGRUDGINGLY admits that you being johnny biased makes him feel kinda small and unimportant

he’d never try to make you change your bias or anything

he just needs reminders that he’s your #1 boy sometimes

which is fine by you

and by him

cus now it’s you calling him pet names all the time

and hugging him

and kissing his cheek

and praising his work

and blowing kisses from across the room

and just telling him straight up that no matter what, you’ll always go to him

(not that you ever had any chance with johnny lmao)

THIS GOES TO SHOW COMMUNICATING IS KEY, CHILDREN

COMMUNICATE

Renjun

wym donghyuck is your bias lol

literally are you fucking kidding him

don’t get me wrong ok

everyone knows renjun loves haechan

they’re bffs and could not live without each other

but at the same time,,,

what is wrong with you

who did he choose as his s/o gods help him

if it was jeno, or mark, or jaehyun, or winwin, or kun, or lucas, or yuta, or taeyong, or ten, or,,,,

literally ANY of his other members

he’d understand your point and be like “ok fine”

but haechan???? hmmm bestie no

he’s not gonna throw a fit

not after the first time you told him anyways

HE WAS SURPRISED OKAY

and he just whined very loudly after having laughed for 5 minutes thinking it was a joke

if you don’t know that iconic scene, renjun had a whole ass meltdown in 3 seconds while yelling “aAAAAAH JINJJAAAAA” and getting ready to punch the living shit out of hyuck

for no reason other than the fact that it’s haechan we’re talking about and injun’s little body is filled with rage

BACK ON TRACK

would probably try to act all cool about it and be like “i don’t mind” but bruh does he mind

and it doesn’t help that haechan is such a little shit about it

he doesn’t even flirt with you

he just

constantly reminds renjun that he’s your bias—not him—and then constantly praises himself over you

“ah, y/n~ did you choose me as your bias because i’m the best vocalist? or was it because i’m the best dancer? mAYBE IT WAS BECAUSE OF MY OH SO BROAD SHOULDERS—”

(pause for injun to punch him)

(unpaused)

and ok in the beginning it was funny seeing him all worked up but now it’s just annoying to be in the same room as these two

haechan won’t let either of you live

and renjun just wants to

fight

so it eventually gets to the point where you’ll talk to renjun and jeno will talk to hyuck cus even the other dreamies are tired of it

except maybe for chenle, he always laughs his ass off when they start bickering

ANYWAY

your conversation goes something like “oh my god renjun i’m literally dating you, i don’t like haechan better or anything you little pile of fury”

while jeno sits hyuck down in front of him and jaemin and just

“bro why are you like this”

“bro”

no but renjun would apologize for going overboard with his protectiveness and jealous energy because he’s not generally like that

he’s angry all the time but never about something involving you, you know

he tries his best to treat you like the royalty you are

but something about hyuck being your bias makes him feel a bit like a castaway???

he’s very creative and as an artsy kid myself i know we’re very prone to feeling left out because we’re just different from the others

so he’d think maybe haechan really has a better voice

or better dancing skills

or he looks better

he is taller than injun after all, and has broader shoulders, and his hair is all fluffy and—

the whole thing just made him insecure about things he had settled with himself long ago

he was fine with being him

but not so much when it came to that

i don’t think you two would fight over it cus tbh i think renjun would really only get with someone who can be very understanding of him

and i think hyuck would actually apologize to renjun too

not when everyone’s around but like, maybe after dinner or something and he just needs to feel like they’re besties again

hyuck never meant for things to get out of control

he just really likes both injun and you as his friends, and aside from skinship his most prominent love language is,,,

teasing

he was really just trying (very poorly) to grow closer to the person his best friend loves so much—you—because renjun is SUCH a big part of his life it would just feel wrong to not be good friends with you as well

don’t tell them i said this but they hug it out

injun strikes me as someone that could take a bit of time to bounce back from something that hurt his pride or his sense of belonging

and his way of healing and bonding is just,,,

art

sure, keep being haechan biased, but also please read with him

and talk about his fantastic animal creations

and watch those buzzfeed unsolved alien theory videos because he really wants to discuss it and maybe even draw what he thinks the aliens look like

hyuck tones it down, you make sure renjun knows you like him for him, renjun starts to (secretly) appreciate hyuck’s talent along with you...

and now let’s take a moment to imagine the minute you watch their latest mv with injun by your side

and yes okay the first thing you see is CLEARLY how good renjun looks because holy fucking shit he’s an angel (and i’m clearly not renjun biased)

but then,,,,,,

wAS THAT A HAECHAN HIGH NOTE

(there’s always a haechan high note, just look for it)

and ok maybe he did scream a bit with you because of how good it all sounded

and you know what, it works out perfectly bc you two are my new otp and you were meant for each other

but we do have to mention the eventual happening of chenle saying like “oOoOoOoH y/N wErE yOu dRoOliNg oVeR hAeChAn AgAiN” after a special stage

and then you, injun and hyuck all attempt to choke him

i’m kidding

or not

Jeno

ah, lee jeno

aka samoyed boi

yes i do call him that no i will not stop

everyone is always writing jeno as being super protective and literally about to burst a lung if someone else ever does as much as look at you

but i just

don’t see him that way

he’s a taurus and from what i know about taurus they can be v v jealous, yes, but they mainly seek comfort

so he’s fine with you biasing jaemin

as long as you’re not ditching him or anything lol

and ok, imma be 100% honest here even if it sounds like literal no fun (jenojaem wink wonk)

jaemin doesn’t flirt with you

not any more than he flirts with

every other breathing creature

ever

he’s really only platonically interested in you, never remotely romantic or anything lol

on the other side, he is in love with jeno

basically, if jaemin is your bias, jeno is his

so nothing really changes

we know how nomin are, okay

they hold hands, they stare deeply into each other eyes, they nearly kiss at least once every time they go live

it's just them

you gotta respect it bruh

i know this is the most boring reaction ever so let’s create the one (1) instance where jeno would actually dislike that you bias someone else

i think he would feel a bit hurt if you seemed to be more supportive of jaemin’s work than his

and it’s not something big or on purpose

it’s just something like going with him to a recording session but not going with jeno because you have homework

or after a very busy practise day going to praise jaemin first

even if it’s just three words

“you did good”

and then you’re going towards him, he’s gonna feel like maybe he doesn’t deserve your praise as much as nana????

i actually feel like, among the dreamies, jeno is the least confident one when it comes to his performance

he knows he’s not an awful rapper or anything but i think it can be a bit too much, being around such bright and huge presences like the others while his nickname literally means “no fun”

his members are just so loud and full of energy most of the time

and sometimes he just really needs to be quiet and observe in silence

(yes i do know he’s chaotic and a crackhead, i’m just saying as we know he can be a bit introspective)

so what if you just

stopped seeing him?

did he become invisible to you?

did you finally fall for jaemin’s beautiful smile and stupid pick-up lines?

he’s not gonna let it show that he’s affected, though

earth signs are nearly always the ones to “stay strong” because we have this image that people are relying on us???

so we do what we do

bottle everything up and overwork ourselves bc we only got two modes

1. chill, super balanced and down to earth (ay for the pun)

2. please make us take a break we’re literally about to cry if we work for one more minute but we can’t allow ourselves to fucking take it easy

so yes you’ve guessed correctly, we’re going with 2

jeno is going to go so, SO hard on everything he does

literally every single activity you can think of from dance practice to photoshoots to cooking for the dreamies

he stays up later than usual to get that one tricky move in the choreo just right

he works out more because he thinks he has to look absolutely perfect for when they shoot the mv

jisung asked for ramen? he’s making it but you bet your ass he’s spending over 40 minutes just chopping so

many

vegetables

AND STUFF THAT JISUNG WON’T EVEN EAT

but he’s doing it anyway for the reason being that it just has to be the Best™

and it’s not like he’s competing with anyone else to be diligent

this is just about being better than he was and showing himself—and maybe you—how painstakingly hardworking and driven he can be

maybe then you’re gonna acknowledge him as much as you acknowledge nana :((

:(((((

writing this is making me downright sad, jeno is so underrated and unaware of his power UGH

and i need to point out this is NOT about making you change your bias from jaemin to him, this is solely about having you recognize his efforts, even if you already do

if you just thought jeno was like going off in work because it was asked of him to, jaemin would DEF notice and talk to you about it

turns out it’s a habit of jeno to go extra hard sometimes and he needs someone to make him take a break

so it goes down like you breaking into the practice room when jeno and jisung were practising

the first reaction is confusion

the second is oh hey babe how are you

third is

a-are you dragging jeno and his bag out of the door while screeching at jisung to order pizza and doughnuts for everyone??

yes you are and i’m proud of you

so jeno is still confused and making those cute “hUh” noises he does omg i love him so much

and you’re just rambling about how much of an amazing artist he is, and you love his voice, and he’s a fantastic dancer, and his expressions and gestures are on point, and he takes such good care of the dreamies and

he’s perfect

and he knows jaemin must have talked to you, and he feels so vulnerable to have you know how on edge he’s been

baby boy just needs some rest

and that’s exactly what you give him, with a bath full of those fancy bath bombs and flower petals and candles at your house/apt

then a quick sheet mask while you massage his shoulders and keep saying how much you genuinely admire him

the mask might be ruined cus he started crying out of exhaustion

after that’s been done and you’ve hugged for at least like 5 min nonstop, you head over to the dorms, where hyuck was in charge of setting up a blanket fort while mork and nana gather board games, jisung gets the food and chenle

well chenle just had to make sure jisung doesn’t forget to order for someone and doesn’t break like 10 plates trying to set the table lol

this is way longer than the others so imma wrap it up

make it obvious and loud that you see and respect jeno’s hard work and he’ll be alright again

and maybe make those game nights a weekly thing when possible, it would make him very happy

he’ll never again feel sad when you praise jaemin cus now he’s sure he does enough, and above all, he is enough

Haechan

haechan = full sun

why would you ever bias someone when you’re dating the goddamned sun

does not understand

but also does not care that much

actually, one out of two really depending on who your bias is

if it’s one of the members he has that tom/jerry relationship with, prepare for so

much

complaining

and clinging

AND HE’D BE SO LOUD OH MY FUCKING GOD

donghyuck please stop screaming about doyoung not deserving to be your baby’s bias, it’s 2 am

on the other hand, if it’s one of the (few) members he,,,

adores with all of his heart and is not afraid to show it

ex: sungchan, jaehyun, taeil and yang2x

then you can bet he’s going to be right beside you whenever you feel like throwing a fit because he’s just so handsome and talented

IF IT’S MARK OSHDISJD

i’m going to write you as being mark biased ok? ok

i honestly don’t know if he’d feel more jealous of mark or of you

he loves you both

a lot,,,,

and he really doesn’t like it when mark blushes when you compliment him

and he doesn’t like it when mark literally just walks past you and you trip over your feet because bro tf u doing, that’s some embarrassing shit

lowkey done with you two

but also PAY HIM SOME ATTENTION

or don’t, he’s fine either way (cue crossed arms and staring at you from across the room until you come give him a kiss)

“he’s pretty cute but i’m cuter right baby”

pouty pouty pouty if he ever feels neglected

will be so fucking annoying lmao i can’t write haechan, i love him but i do understand why renjun is always trying to beat him up

he’d be a show-off in a different way than mark because he can be so petty

will take every chance he gets to pull a one-liner

will sing everything he has to say just so you know he can hit those high notes

what do you mean dream doesn’t have a schedule today

oh man, he could swear they did

because that is the sole reason why he’s wearing his most expensive clothes and shoes + makeup to walk around the dorms, yes

no he doesn’t want to impress you

shut up

will text you like every single fancam he sees on twitter

every

single

one

and are they mark’s?

lol no, they’re his

he is so genuinely trying to make you a member of his sunflower cult

<whispers> “tell me i’m your bias”

“donghyuck what the actual hell why are you standing at the end of my bed in the middle of the night like a fucking demon child”

he really wants to act all cool and composed but he wants to be your bias so fucking bad

he’s a bad bitch all around and just does whatever

cus haechan privilege

and he tends to not care about what people say and think???

bc he knows he’s lee donghyuck

he’s fully aware of the effect he has on people

but you

not biasing him

naw, he can’t take it

will do anything and everything he can to make you say, JUST ONE TIME, he’s your bias

then you can go back to loving (his) mark

so for your sake, for his sake, for mark’s sake

just give donghyuck what he wants

i can promise he’ll keep being an ass no matter what you do

like yeah did you just buy him coffee and his favourite cake? well that’s sweet but iS HE YOUR BIAS YET

“aw babe thanks so much for taking a bullet for me but now please say i’m your bias”

if you still don’t do it, it’s time to be extra petty

will actually drop you for mark

his logic is something like: he can’t be your bias? pity, so he’s just gonna date him instead

and mark is mark so he has no idea what’s going on

everyone in 127 and dream finds this absolutely hilarious cus suddenly donghyuck seems to be doing his best to win over mark’s heart and i mean more than usual???? and he’s treating you like his bro????

<you leaving the dorms to go to uni or smth so you go to hyuck for a goodbye kiss> “no can do, i’m committed”

“i’m your partner”

“no that’s mark”

it’s not 100% a joke when i say i can see him getting down in one knee to propose to mark while making eye contact with you to

assert his dominance

and mark is just

“dude

what HAHAHA”

and you are so done, i’m so sorry you have to go through that bby

i don’t think there’s another way to fix haechan other than just admitting he was your bias for an era, or a comeback or something

like yeah with the other dreamies before him it’s bonding + healing time bc i wrote it all kinda angsty (lol sorry) but with donghyuck

“will you stop this if i say you were my bias during reload era”

“mark wasn’t in dream that era tho”

“yes i know”

i say he’s gonna take what he can get and now things can finally go back to normal

with the exception that something else comes along with hyuck being satisfied with you biasing him

he just has a full pass to fanboy over mark now too

what am i talking about?

new 127 mv is out

you: watching it beside haechan and going off about how pretty mark looks

him: going off even harder bc he’s whipped too

this is what a happy couple looks like

but now i pity mark because he has you two idiots fanboying over him irl

savemork2021

Jaemin

nana is just such a chill and fun guy

i can’t see him being actually jealous or anything if he finds out you bias someone else

and so the two of you become insufferable together

bitch, i’m telling you

he (ur bias) is not gonna have one peaceful day ever again in his entire life

cus you know the thing jaemin does where he just looks at someone doing some random shit and goes “oOoOoH sExY”

yes that thing

he’s doing it to your bias

and you’re doing it too

and your bias probably wants to run away to some very far away land

PLEASE IF IT’S JISUNG

i’m not gonna write this whole thing as if you bias him but let’s just imagine

two fully grown people

pilling on top of poor, poor park jisung playing games on his phone

“URI JISUNGIEEEEEE

MWOYA, MWOYAAAA~"

i genuinely think he would avoid being around you two at the same time

cus individually he can handle it

like yes y/n please let me go this hug has lasted for about 4 minutes now

or oh hi jaemin hyung my cheeks hurt when you pinch them that hard

but when you two are together

bruh

a power couple not bc you two are v confident or some shit but bc you can and will be extremely affectionate towards anyone that comes too close

and now let’s talk about how it would be if you biased jaehyun

jaemin loves jaehyun

they’re 2jae

2jae are soulmates

therefore,,,, it’s also kinda hellish but in a different way???

bc 2jae are on the end of that spectrum about the neos that know how in love the entire world is with them

they’re too powerful

they’re aware of their charm and they do everything they can to rub it in our faces

so the flirting between 2jae and you would be insane

and i mean insane

insane as in even johnny is kinda disgusted tbh bc

they’re doing a photo shoot with the 23 of them for some shit, idk don’t ask me

and of course, you had to tag along

but oh my god you three, please stop calling each other sexy/hot in weird voices now, the staff is staring

there are def rumours the 3 of you are a poly couple lmao

jaehyun denies everything on social media (throwback to saying “no way lol” when we asked if he REALLY slept in the same bed as jungwoo)

but every piece of content there is of you and jaemin or you and jaehyun or just them is so ridiculously flirty

you can bet there are compilations on youtube like

“y/n being in love with 2jae for 8 minutes heterosexual”

ok i was having way too much fun with that, moving on

i don’t think he’d ever be actually upset about you biasing someone else

he trusts you and treasures you a lot so he doesn’t see the problem in you also appreciating another one of his members

bc gods know he does

he’s a bit in love with everyone so why shouldn’t you be too lol

one time he would feel a bit blue because of it???

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

i think it’s possible he’d turn pouty or whiny or just kinda needy (not in a bad way, he just misses you) when he’s like

done with people

and needs some time away from everything

we know he’s an introvert, even if he acts very, very loud around the boys and it’s honestly just a matter of time until an introvert grows tired of being around humans

it depends on each person, of course, but there’s a 99% chance every once in a while he’ll start to feel too drained

and he’ll need a break to get his energy back

jaemin would probably want you around even when he feels like that, though

i see you being such a big source of comfort for him in a relationship

he enjoys taking care of people so please take care of him too

and for just this one day don’t talk about your bias that much, or don’t leave nana to go over to him to chat

and just cuddle him a lot

that will make him a smiley baby again

and then things are back to how they normally are

and by that i mean most neos hiding from you because they’re scared

i don’t have a lot to say aside from that so let’s think about the neos that would be the most intimidated by your shared thot aura

dotae would be confused in different ways lol

taeyong would be just ????????????blush/awkward smile/hahaha??????

and doyoung might actually ask what is wrong with you

<points to jeno and his s/o> “why can’t you be like them”

mark would laugh-scream and slap his knee into oblivion whenever you two are cornering him

but then go super shy and be like “dUDE DON’T DO THAT”

resident confident gay jungwoo would rejoice in the attention and make so many goddamned jokes

a literal comedian i love him

i think sicheng and renjun would be on the same wavelength of repugnance towards you lol

chenle would deadass call you weird and tell you to leave him alone

shotaro and kun might faint (or kun will panic-scold you)

taeil is as confused by affection as usual (have you seen the face he makes when haechan kisses him LMFAO he’s smiling but like wondering wtf happened on the inside)

ten is not very amused but might play into it

yangyang: that’s disgusting, man (cue flashbacks to that live with renjun after the from home stage where renjun pretended to lick his hand and slick his hair back,,, catboy injun,,, you know the one)

xiaojun and hendery are such panicked gays they just turn to stare at whoever else is around and make that “help” expression like they’re on the office

haechan is haechan, kinda doesn’t mind it

jeno is used to dealing with this at this point

lucas and yuta love the attention but while yuta will flirt right back lucas is just gonna smile and try to jop his way out of there while screaming

sungchan will go hide behind haechan and say “hyung they’re being dumbasses again”

this turned into ‘how would nct react to you and jaemin being super flirty together’ and i’m not sorry

Chenle

chenle is so fun to write i love him lmao

okay so

he doesn’t strike me as the possessive type with anyone other than jisung (bc i swear he can be a bit jelly towards his bestie but i think it comes with sungie being the sweetest bean ever, he’s just protective)

he’s such a ray of sunshine and witty jokes and dolphin laughter i love him

back to the plot

he literally couldn’t care less about you biasing someone else

b u t

i will say there’s an exception

this exception is tall, kinda lanky, very awkward and born on the 5th of february

you’ve guessed it, it’s jisung

i think most of the time he’d tease THE SHIT out of you for it because c’mon

you had 22 chances not to mess up

and you still somehow ended up biasing jisung? lol do better next time

and this is not me and chenle hating on jisung, please—

he’d just find it funny that your bias is his best friend and

hold the fuck up

your bias is his best friend

oH NO NO NO NO NO

i think after realizing that he would lowkey try to keep you two apart because he’s somehow jealous of both????

and if he can’t help it then you can bet your ass he will be screaming all along

it’s his sweet, dummy jisung

with his sweeter and dummier y/n

what is he going to do

probably has a mini-breakdown with kun because like he’s always wanted you two to get along bUT NOT LIKE THAT

kun will just sigh like the tired father he is and pet his back while saying “there, there”

and a genius idea is going to come to chenle’s mind

you know the teasing thing?

well it’s upgrade time

he’s gonna turn into such a try-hard with tmi and embarrassing shit you two have done

and he’s not trying to stop you from being friends

he just wants you to like

know who you’re befriending

bc i think since he’s really really close to jisung, he doesn’t want you getting closer to him bc you like his idol side alone

and he doesn’t want jisung getting close to you just because you’re his partner either

if you had high hopes for each other and ended up kinda falling face-first into the ground bc it was nothing like you had imagined—

he’d be so broken

because he loves you so much :((((

so like, if you can get past the teasing and annoying barrier he’s putting up, he’ll be more than happy to have two of the most important people in his life being buddies

so get ready for it

if you’re the type of person to go batshit crazy when you drink, oh boy, oh boy

so you and the dreamies are just having dinner when lele feels like it’s the perfect time to disclose some of your drunken adventures

“hey y/n”

“yeah babe?”

“remember that time you got really really drunk on vodka and candy and wanted to call your mom”

“chenle the hell don’t talk ab—”

“but then you tried using the microwave as a phone”

“...”

“or that other time you were equally as drunk and watched the make a wish mv and cried because you noticed the height difference between xiaojun hyung and lucas hyung”

yeah so now’s the part you get up to chase him around the dorms and try to land a kick

BUT WORRY NOT, HE’LL MAKE SURE TO EMBARRASS JISUNG JUST AS MUCH

he likes doing that when it’s just the three of you though

so picture this

movie night the girls boys

chenle would 100% pick the most terrifying horror movie he can find so that he could see jisung clinging to whoever’s closest to him

and then right before a jumpscare, he’d whisper like

“jisung”

“w-what”

“why don’t you do that thing you were doing while you slept last night”

(honestly, i’d be mildly scared if i heard lele say this with no context at all)

and then the jumpscare happens and jisung is nearly fainting and crying at the same time

but chenle is laughing

and trying to get out what he wants to tell you between wheezes

“he-he” <dolphin wheeze> “hE WAS SINGING CHEER UP BY TWICE WHILE SLEEPING” <more wheezes>

and look this is just gonna go on for weeks until you and jisung are over it

and stop being weird and awkward around each other

lele needs you two to be bros ok

so be bros

once you do adapt to being pals with your bias i think chenle would take the teasing down a notch just to make you more comfortable

and like he’s so happy now the three of you can hang out and there’s just no tension

happy chenle is the thing i love the most i swear to gods

and if you don’t adapt to it?

well,,,

i honestly think he’d be pretty disappointed, cus it means to him one of you isn’t ready to fully embrace the weirdness within????

and like what u scared of

jisung is a weirdo, what about it, so are you

either that or he’d think you’re maybe being judgemental

so yeah please accept jisungie and your dumbass boyfriend

then everyone can be besties

i love thinking about the three of you as just this hellbound chaotic trio

because chenji already wreak havoc wherever they go as the two of them

but now that you’re coming along,,,,

no neo would escape from your pranks ever again (and even members of other groups lmfao watch out sehun, i’m talking to you)

and it’s so incredible infuriating in a good way that it just turns to be endearing

you’re cute as fuck so no one gets actually mad with the shit you pull????

which is dangerous, someone should really keep an eye out on the three of you

we don’t need sm to be on fire

well we kinda do cus they’re pretty bad but not my point

i said somewhere above that chenle would tone the teasing down but i don’t mean he’d stop

bc c’mon guys

he’s chenle

no limits here

but sorry, i really cannot write jealous!chenle cus his heart is just too pure and filled with joy for him to be jealous for real

last scenario?

chenle after a comeback stage: ya y/n, i was gonna ask how was my performance today but you were probably more focused on jisung’s arms right

jisung is choking on water somewhere behind you

Jisung

it’s maknae time <plays i.n’s maknae on top>

i don’t mean to picture jisung as being like

ridiculously innocent or just downright naive because i really dislike it when people do that

he’s a literal 19 yo and jaemin himself has said he’s not as innocent as we think lol

however

i do see him as being quite new to all things love

i think you’d probably be his first partner and with first relationships comes a lot of other firsts

first kiss maybe, first time holding hands, first time being jealous….

first time being jealous, yes, focus on that

i don’t think jisung would be aware that like

you not biasing him is even a possibility

cuz you’re dating

doesn’t that come along????

ah poor baby i love him

if you biased chenle i think he’d be just

disgusted and weirded out but okay?? you do you i guess???

he’s comfortable enough with lele to not feel intimidated

but if it’s another member

ESPECIALLY one of the oldest ones

i think it would be a blow straight to his confidence

you biasing ten, kun, taeil, taeyong, doyoung or johnny and maybe yuta would make him feel a bit hesitant and concerned

his first thought would probably be that you don’t like being with someone as young as him

and who knows, maybe you’re even younger than him, maybe you’re the same age, but what if you actually like older guys??

what about him then???

and jisung doesn’t mean to feel so worried and insecure, ok, pls understand where i’m coming from

first relationships normally take like a very long time to build trust and acceptance of the other person’s feelings bc it’s literally a whole new world for you

and that goes extra hard for jisung because he is so fucking whipped for you it’s still hard to believe you like him as much

and it absolutely does not cross his mind that you’d cheat on him with your bias, GODS NO

he really respects you and his hyungs

so no, never

that’s not a thing that can happen

but you realize you’re too good for him and maybe see he doesn’t fit your ideal type?

well, yes, that’s what he’s thinking

probably goes straight to chenle or renjun (he talks about renjun so much asjahj) to vent and ask for advice

i think they’d be surprised to see what’s going on inside his pretty little head because it’s so obvious for everyone that you just adore jisung

and they do tell him that

however, i don’t think it would completely calm his nerves, and again, this has nothing to do with not trusting you

it’s just that

his hyungs are so cool…

HE CAN’T HELP IT OK

would probably try to mirror your bias (i’m saying it’s taeyong for the sake of what i’ve imagined ok) and like

grasp onto some of his qualities?

so in his mind taeyong is: nice, sweet, caring, amazing, perfect, smart, perfect, sexy, mature and did i mention perfect

i can see him trying some new rap styles that mimic tyong’s a bit???

like would lowkey learn his raps from cherry bomb and superm’s one and listen to recordings frequently to pick up on how taeyong does it

i think he’d also just change the way he acts in general to dodge a bit from his maknae image

so now he tries to speak with a more formal-ish language and learns random facts about things you like to seem more intelligent???

“good morning y/n, you look as beautiful as one of voiello’s paintings today :]”

“wait i thought that was a pasta brand”

he’s just trying to show you he can be mature and serious if you want him to

long story short, he’s not acting like himself (not that he’s childish, he’s just out of it) and you don’t like it, so you ask about it and wait for him to feel comfortable with sharing

when he does talk about it breaks your heart so much :((

you’re going to need some patience to try and show him you’d choose him, and not your bias, even if you had the chance

they’re completely different people and you love him BECAUSE he’s jisung, not for any other reason

please reassure him so he can go back to acting like his authentic self, i think it would be such a relief for him too

your words and affection are obviously enough for him, but if it ever happens that he feels especially low and insecure again, it would help if your bias talks to him too

and taeyong wouldn’t have a problem with it

actually, scratch that, taeyong probably knew what was going on all along

he just has that motherly 7th sense (ay) that is even more acute with the dreamies cus like

127 has him, wayv has kun, but dream has…

the dreamies

and that, my friend, is terrifying

anyway he’d come to talk to jisung asking like “what’s wrong buddy :(“ and sungie would be a bit ashamed because it sounds so silly when you say it out loud

of course tyong wouldn’t judge him, and he just really has to tell jisung what is it you and he are always talking about

it’s him

“when they come around to talk and hang out here it all goes back to you, jisungie. they can’t spend one second without mentioning your name

it’s so cute; it’s always like ‘oh jisung would love this’ or ‘jisung likes it that way’

so please be kinder to yourself and let yourself see that they’re in love with you, not with me and not with any other member they ever mention”

jisung would feel 10000000% better

and smiley

and giggly

and oh my god do you really talk about him that much

LOOK HE’S BLUSHING

would just go over to your house immediately and hug you, burying his face on your neck from behind you

and not let go

ever again

the whole situation just teaches him a lot about accepting your love for him and not questioning it

shut up i’m not crying

---

final notes: this was my first work after the humanity series and it was so fun lol i think next up is probs gonna be an ideal type scenario for ot23 (but if i really write it i’m gonna post it by subunit and its gonna be way shorter than this, don’t expect 23K words at once lmao)

if you’ve enjoyed this fic please consider reading my humanity series, which is a zombie apocalypse au with kun <3

334 notes · View notes

slightlymore · 4 years ago

Text

no, thank you

part of the Pride Universe

jaemin x fem reader

others: haechan (mentioned in jaemin's thoughts but not present in the real plot)

genre: smut with plot, roommates au, mentions of university (jaemin is a med student), angst, fluff, very +18 tho

warnings: very! rough! smut! (brat taming, oral, masturbation, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, denial, slight degradation, restriction, manhandling, bath tub is one of the locations), short mentions of mlm (jaemin x haechan fwb in the past), yn comes off rude in the beginning but it's necessary for character development, yn has an anxiety attack, angsty

words: 11.3K

this is kinda good if I say so myself, yall have to read 👁️ if you don't like mlm or memberxmember I promise it's just a short bit of fluff/angst connecting it to Cute~ and that's all lol, the plot is very jaeminxreader centered

Jaemin has been told that he can't say no to people. Yes, he will come to the party. Yes, he can help with the moving out. Yes, he can help you with Anatomy. Yes, that kind of anatomy as well.

The only time Jaemin would say no is when people would ask if he’s busy or tired. No, I’m fine. No, everything is alright.

"Do you ever sleep, Jaemin?" Haechan asked once.

His soft and sleepy voice made Jaemin smile. He wrapped the boy’s waist even tighter, tugging Haechan’s body against his.

“Of course I do.” Haechan chuckled. “When?” “When you’re not here”, the other whispered. “Lies. You’re studying when I’m not here. Look at what kind of service I’m doing. Fucking you so that you can just lie in bed and fall asleep.” Jaemin smiled again and ghosted Haechan’s forehead with his lips ready to place a kiss on the other’s warm skin. He stopped himself before doing so. “Yeah, thank you for your service.”

But since Haechan started to date some guy, there was no one to force him into bed and make Jaemin rest.

The boy would drift off to unconsciousness for a little while every night, head pressed into his med school books, mind full of notions and caffeine. He would stay like that for an indefinite amount of time, not enough to fully fall asleep but enough to being shaken to the core when he would wake up, batting his eyelashes as his unfocused gaze tried to make sense of his surroundings. Then he would get up slowly from his uncomfortable chair and drag his feet to the kitchen to make his nth cup of coffee for the night.

Jaemin has never had a roommate and it was probably because of Haechan. Said boy wouldn’t have cared less if someone was in the other room, listening to their moans, but Jaemin didn’t like that. Instead, he loved it when Haechan would pull up to his doorstep unannounced, eyes either wide with tears or tight with lust. Because the choice was Jaemin. It was always Jaemin. Haechan needed him and Jaemin loved it. He couldn’t have other distractions. No flatmates knocking on the door and complaining. Just him and Haechan, on his bed, on the couch, on the kitchen counters, against the entrance door, on the floor, in the shower. Jaemin didn’t know, but it wasn’t just him doing Haechan a favour, maybe quite the opposite. Because Jaemin has been also told that he doesn’t ask for help. He doesn’t let people know about his needs, or whatever. But Haechan was aware of that. It took Jaemin a little while to notice it, especially since the other was already gone, but more often than not, Haechan would just show up for no apparent reason. “Nothing happened,” he would say, “I was just horny.” But Haechan would come for him. Because that’s how Haechan was. He could see people very well and he could see Jaemin when he needed something, or when he was exhausted and needed a simple hug, or when he didn’t sleep in days or having eaten nothing more than a single cup of instant noodles. They were friends with benefits but the benefits sometimes were just lying beside each other and talk, or order in some food while watching a movie. Sometimes they would just kiss for a long time, during nights where Haechan felt weaker, and those were Jaemin’s favourite nights. “You should sleep now,” the older would whisper against his lips and Jaemin would reply with a short-breathed yeah, in a second, before letting his tongue inside the other’s mouth slowly for another hour or so. Some people might have said that Jaemin was in love, but the boy had no idea himself whether that was the case or not and he didn’t want to think about that. Jaemin didn’t like thinking at all. But he loved it when others did and he loved to think about their thoughts instead of his own. He wanted to know people’s reasons and why they behaved in a certain manner so that he could understand himself without actively trying to.

“So, what do you think?” Jaemin was standing proud in the middle of his spot-free living room, hands on his hips, like a housewife expecting compliments from her housewive friends.

“Could be better,” you mumbled, biting your nails, barely looking around.

When you found Jaemin’s pretty written paper renting a room on the university notice board, you did assume he was a girl.

“What could be better?” he smiled at you.

You stared back, sensing sarcasm but upon seeing the boy’s genuine expression you realized how naive he was.

“I don’t know. The roommate maybe?” you rolled your eyes and walked towards your assigned room, dragging your suitcase carelessly on the nice wooden floor. “I’m staying, by the way,” you yelled after closing your door with your foot with a loud bang.

____

You have been told a lot of stuff during your life. Selfish, rude, uncaring, insensitive.

It would make you angry.

You would yell back that it’s not true making people step back and add some more adjectives that you wouldn’t want to use while describing yourself in class.

You fought that back a lot, crying secretly under your covers, terrorized of being alone by yourself, afraid of being alone with such a bad person.

You fought and fought until one day you just stared back at those people.

So what? you found yourself thinking. Perhaps I am. Yeah. I am selfish and I don’t give a shit. So what about that? What are you all going to do?

And when you ignored people, they started to ignore you as well.

And slowly, everyone knew that no, you would not help them with their homework, no, you didn’t want to go to their stupid party, no, you didn’t give a shit about their new college charity event.

And you didn’t give a single fuck about Jaemin’s rules.

“So, you can actually do whatever you want, really. The only things I ask of you is-,” he tried to speak to you the first morning of you living together.

You turned your music loudly on purpose the previous night as you settled in. You wanted to see the boy come knocking on your door and finally throw away his polite mask as everyone does around you after a few minutes of knowing you. Because you’re rude and it’s better for them to just know that from the start.

The thing you hated the most was people giving you a little hope, that maybe you’re likeable and they wouldn’t turn their backs on you. Yet, you’ve quickly realized that it is impossible. Not with you. Not since you’re such a horrible person.

“Yeah, I don’t care,” you replied, one of Jaemin’s red apples between your teeth, a little juice glistening on your lips after you bit down. They were prettily on display in the middle of the kitchen island with a little vase of fresh flowers kept them company on the right.

The boy looked at your mouth for a second before locking eyes with you. “Okay,” he simply replied grabbing an apple himself. “I’m glad you like apples. I was afraid they would go to waste-,” but he didn’t complete the sentence, one hand suspended in the air, eyes wide as you let the piece of apple you were munching on fall on the ground as well as the fruit you were holding.

“These apples are actually disgusting,” you commented then you both listened to the sound the apple made as it rolled into the living room and stopped as it met the soft rug.

That was it.

It wasn’t your fault that this boy had more patience than your previous flatmates and you had to go stronger on him.

Kick me out? Are you going to kick me out now? Come on. Kick me out.

But Jaemin didn’t look mad.

After the initial confusion, he just put his apple back on top of the others and grabbed a paper towel. He knelt in front of you as you stood there with crossed arms and picked up your half munched bite of fruit and threw it away. Then he walked the few steps separating the kitchen island to the living room and picked up the apple as well, giving it the same journey towards the trash.

You scoffed.

Jaemin still didn’t say anything and grabbed a pan out of the cabinets. “I’m making pancakes,” he announced calmly. “I don’t like pancakes,” you acted like a kid but the feeling gripping at your throat was something new and you didn’t know how to behave.

This Jaemin guy made you angrier than other people.

Jaemin turned around to face you. “What do you like, Y/N?”

You stared back for a few seconds at his neutral and unbothered face, then shoulder bumped him as you walked away. Grabbing your backpack from the ground you just slammed the entrance door on your way out.

You knew you were annoying. You also hated yourself just like everyone hated you. But you couldn’t help it. It has happened before. You let yourself believe that maybe you were kind and sweet, that you had a caring heart, that people would like you. Yet, soon after, they would finally realize that you weren’t like that at all. That you were a monster trying to put on an act. So you liked the idea of people seeing the worst you could be first, so they could just leave if they couldn’t handle it.

And no one could. Yet this Jaemin dude didn't budge.

You came home late that day and you noticed the way Jaemin turned off his music as he heard you enter your room.

God, you hated him.

And the morning after he was already in the kitchen, hair wet on his forehead, a white towel around his neck.

He smiled like an angel.

"Eggs and bacon?"

You ignored him.

And the morning after again. "Fruit?" Door slam.

And another morning again. "Maybe cappuccino and croissants?" he wondered. Again.

"Porridge?" "Okay! Okay. Fuck. Okay", you finally replied.

It was the weekend and you had no excuse to dramatically leave the apartment as you did the previous days when you had to go to class. You were standing in the same spot in front of the kitchen island as the first day when you made a fool out of yourself by spitting out a piece of an apple.

"I'm fine with whatever,” you added quietly. "Toast?" Jaemin raised his eyes from underneath his fringe before his hand could throw the locks back revealing the forehead.

You shrugged.

He smiled excitedly and got busy around the cabinets, the scent of his aftershave intimidating you.

Walking around him silently you sat up on the kitchen stools, placing your hands on the marble and looked down, uneasy. It was alright if Jaemin was kind now then would start hate you afterwards. You could rest for a little bit, right? You could just put down your shield and breathe. It’s not like you would become friends if the made you breakfast.

"How did the week go? You guys have many exams?" Jaemin's voice slightly startled you.

Looking up you saw that he was already looking at you, two white plates in front of him with two pieces of hot toast. You stared back for a second then looked at the way his hands spread jam on the bread.

"It was alright," you found yourself speaking.

How was yours? You probably should have asked. But you didn't care and you were afraid to randomly engage in more than a few words long conversations.

"Here," Jaemin placed the food in front of you then he licked his thumb. Thank you, you should have said. But Jaemin didn't look bothered.

After a few moments of silence during which you couldn't bring yourself to start eating, Jaemin sighed like a British person would while slapping their knees when announcing they should go.

"Alright. I'll eat in my room. I have a lot of stuff to do,” he announced and left with the plate. You stared at his back as he lazily dragged his feet towards the corridor and when you heard his door close you finally tasted the toast.

_____

A scared cat. An angry and scared cat.

This was the first thing Jaemin thought when he saw you.

Honestly, he almost lost it on the first day but kept it in together when he saw the way your hands trembled while being confronted. Then all of his anger died.

No, I don't care, you told him yet you didn't turn up your music loudly again after the first night and you never bothered him. It was almost as if you weren't even there.

What a nicely crafted facade, Jaemin would think, hands behind his head, a pencil between his lips, an open manual on his chest, eyes directed towards an indefinite point on his ceiling.

It was very late at night. His phone buzzed once and the boy stared at the "apartment empty, wanna come?" text.

Yeah, he could use some of that.

And he would have been at his friend's place by now if a weird noise wouldn't have stopped him from putting on his shoes.

It was coming from your room, a small choked sound, barely audible that Jaemin wouldn't have heard it in other circumstances. He walked the corridor slowly until gently stopping in front of you door, a slight blush covering his cheeks. Could it be-?

But no.

Jaemin heard a fair share of whimpering girls before and you definitely weren't enjoying yourself. So he knocked, suddenly worried. "Y/N?" You didn't reply, only a little whimper being caught by Jaemin's ears. "Y/N, is everything alright?" He waited, face almost pressed on the cool wood. Another choking sound and "I'm coming in, now,” he announced and you couldn't stop him.

Sat on your bed, wet cheeks from crying and irregular breaths, you looked up like a scared deer, sliding back when Jaemin walked towards you. "Shh, it's alright," he whispered with a calm voice, hands in front of himself as he sat down in front of you.

"Don't touch me. Go away," you flinched, hiding your face from his gaze.

Jaemin had a reassuring face when he spoke again. "I won't touch you if you don’t want me to."

"Go away. Leave me alone," you repeated with a feeble voice, arms pulling your knees to your chest.

Jaemin looked at you for a few moments, your baby blue pyjama and irregular breath, then he gently sat down on the bed in front of you and crossed his legs.

"Do you take medicine?" he asked softly. You shook your head. "Okay. Then, will you look at me?" You sobbed and furtively raised your eyes to meet his for a short moment before looking away. "It's alright. You're doing great." Jaemin's voice was low, articulating every word slowly and he didn't move. "It's scary, I know. But there's no danger now. I'm protecting you." His eyes were trained on your face and you finally let yourself stare back fully.

"Imitate me," he spoke again, breathing in and out slowly. A little sob escaped your lips before you could do the same.

"Good. You're doing amazing. Slowly," he cooed and you did just that for an indeterminate amount of times, the silence engulfig you both until you looked down and saw your fingers wrapped around Jaemin's hands.

You let them go surprised but your palms liked how soothing touching another human’s skin felt.

His was soft and warm, and you concentrated on the way the heat spread to your cold hands, holding them again timidly.

Then you let yourself fall on the pillows, eyes looking up at the ceiling, the sobs getting more time between each other.

Jaemin remained still for a moment, as if unsure what to do, then he slowly moved to the side, walking on all fours until resting on the bed beside you.

A little stronger whine shook your frame again though and he slightly rolled over, rising on his elbow the other hand above your body.

"I'm-- going to touch your diaphragm. Is this alright?"

You bit your lower lip then nodded.

"Okay, breathe in again, keep it for one second, then release slowly."

You inhaled, staring at Jaemin's big eyes as if looking for approval. His hand ghosted your stomach until finally resting on your body right underneath your bust.

"That's right," he spoke softly. "Now, again.”

You repeated the exercise, feeling Jaemin's warm palm through the clothes every time your rib cage expanded.

"Again," he breathed in with you, keeping it, then releasing it.

After a while your mind felt like white, blood fully oxygenated, Jaemin’s non-invading and calming presence actually making you feel better.

Yet your heartbeat couldn't stop beating and Jaemin could feel it.

"Again," his low voice made your arms skin shiver with goosebumps, your breathing getting irregular instead of steady.

"Focus on my hand and your breath," he said but his gaze falling on your slightly open lips wasn't helping you focus at all.

He blinked and looked up into your eyes again.

It was even worse. "Jaemin, I'm fine now.”

The boy blinked a few times and retrieved his hand slowly.

Your breath calmed down and Jaemin took it for a good sign since he returned to his side of the bed.

It became silent so suddenly that you could hear Jaemin swallow.

Thank you? Thank you for being here? Or, thank you for helping me out. Sorry for slapping your hand away? Is this what you should have said, right?

“Then, I’ll be going now,” his soft voice disrupted the silence and your bed creaked in the darkness as he presumably got up.

No, wait, wait.

"Why do I become like this at night?" you whispered instead.

Jaemin’s silhouette against your dark blue windows moved around and lied on the bed again, this time on his stomach, bust raised on his elbows, eyes probably on the shadows of your face.

"It's because the front part of your brain gets quieter and gives space to the other parts of your brain where feelings are."

"Why do you always have a good answer to everything?"

You heard Jaemin's breath form a light chuckle.

"Many people told me that before."

"Okay, right."

"No, wait, I meant that- I'm not bragging, sorry--it came out very weirdly."

You smiled, the dark and sudden sleepiness making you care less about keeping up your cold image.

"You want to be a psychiatrist?" "I don't know."

You turned on your side, hands pressed under your face, knees buckled until almost touching his hips. "Why is that?"

Jaemin sighed. "I don't know if I'm good at helping people."

The laugh you let out took both of you by surprise. "Are you joking?"

The boy exhumed perplexed energy even if you couldn’t see him properly.

"You're a human matt with weird gigantic patience. You'll help people alright." "A human mat?" Jaemin raised his eyebrow at you but you still noticed the amused twinkle in his eyes. "Yeah, you have no self-esteem,” you went on. "I have self-esteem," the other protested. "If you did, you wouldn’t let people treat you like that."

Jaemin let the clock on your wall fill the silence with its ticks for a little while.

"Like what?" he whispered.

You rolled on your back, unable to look at him anymore. "Like how I treat you."

"So you're aware of that."

"So you're aware of that as well but choose to ignore it instead of fighting back?"

Jaemin rolled on his back as well, hand rising to his forehead and ruffling his fringe.

You stared at the way the strands fell back exposing his forehead then you looked at his furrowed eyebrows and finally at his lips when he opened them to speak. "What's the point in fighting back?"

A car roared outside your open window, giving you more time to collect your thoughts.

"What's the point in being stupidly kind like that?" you finally spoke up. Your voice was a little whisper as if you secretly wanted Jaemin to not hear you. But he did.

"So I can live by my principles." "And are you happy?"

Ah.

Shit.

Jaemin was at a loss of words.

"Isn't it better to just be yourself and do whatever the fuck you want?" you went on. "Like you?" he finally spoke up. "Yeah." "But you're not doing what you want.”

It was your turn to have no words to choose from.

"You're not yourself, are you?" he asked. "I am," but your voice didn't seem convincing even to your ears. "People are not going to like you more if you behave as you do," you added. "And what should I do to make people like me?" Jaemin inquired. "Nothing. Just be yourself."

Jaemin sat up slowly and briefly looked out of the window.

"Then you should follow this advice as well. Stop putting on this act."

You didn't sleep the whole night after Jaemin slowly exited your room.

_____

The next day you already left when Jaemin got up and walked to the kitchen.

He heard you leave actually. He couldn't sleep the whole night either.

Are you happy? Are you yourself?

No. After turning and rolling on his bed Jaemin got to the conclusion that he wasn't happy or himself at all.

Not all the time at least.

Because most of the times he did care about people, but he could also point out times when he did too much for no reason, getting back nothing but a bittersweet taste on his tongue.

When he came back home after class, an intense sweet fragrance welcomed him first as he stepped inside. With the back turned at him and wearing his black apron, you were frantically looking for something in the kitchen cabinets.

Jaemin indulged in looking at you for a little while, a fizzy feeling inside his chest, small happiness created by moments like finding money in an old jacket, a little surprise you didn’t need but that made your day better.

How would it feel to behave like you? Would Jaemin be able to do it?

At first, Jaemin wondered why you were like that, but after the previous night, he hit his head with an imaginary palm, feeling stupid for not realizing it earlier.

You were just like him.

Hiding something in front of people.

He cleared his throat and smiled when you jolted with a little scream. “For fuck’s sake.”

Yeah, you were hiding the little girl he saw crying on her bed and he was hiding the needy little boy that so desperately wanted to be loved.

“I’m sorry for startling you,” he let his bag fall on the floor as he sat on the kitchen stools in front of you. “Are those cookies?” he indicated the oven with his chin.

You adjusted your clothes as if suddenly realizing how embarrassing it was to wear an apron.

“Why ask obvious questions?”

Jaemin’s smile widened until showing his teeth and you felt like either fight him or run away from his eyes. What a weirdo, you thought. It was almost as if he was enjoying your moodiness.

“Are you looking for something?” he asked again. You crossed your arms on your chest and Jaemin thought that seizing you in the act of being domestic was something that highly embarrassed you.

He loved it.

“No.” The boy rested his head on one arm, tilting his head to the side, already knowing what you were trying to do before. “Shall we decorate the cookies together? I can make the icing. The colouring is in the other cabinet.”

You turned around and stared at the only place you didn’t look before. “I wasn’t trying to decorate them,” you lied.

Jaemin lifted his hands as if innocent. “Never said that,” then smiled as you rolled your eyes.

“Do you have plans tonight?” he walked around you to retrieve the decorations and you felt your breath hitch when he had to press himself on your back. “Because the cookies have to cool down first,” Jaemin explained.

You didn’t reply and untied your apron, suddenly regretting your decision to remain in the kitchen instead of hiding in your room.

“Watch a movie with me, please?”

The “no” was already on the tip of your tongue but then you heard the “please” and your eyes moved to Jaemin’s face by themselves. His hands were pressing into the isle, shoulders raised as if he was trying to lift himself, the evident nervousness in his expression making you feel at a loss of words.

You didn’t expect Jaemin to be shy. Why was he shy? To ask you to watch a movie with him? That made him shy?

“Okay.”

His eyes widened. “Okay?”

You almost laughed at how surprised he was and you had to admit that seeing him run around the kitchen to get to the living room was pretty adorable.

A little sigh, as if a warning, left your lungs when you walked towards the couch. You were probably doing a mistake, but Jaemin - God - Jaemin was so kind.

Watching his back as he was sat down on his knees in front of the tv, so eager to spend some time with you, even if it was fake, even if he didn’t really care, made your heart swell up. No one has behaved like that before. Maybe it was alright.

“Okay, but I choose the movie,” you extended the hand and Jaemin got up, placing the remote controller on your palm. His smile never left his lips as you shuffled the options. “What about this?” Jaemin read the description with squinty eyes. "Oh, I don't like happy endings." You looked at him. "Why is that?"

The boy remained quiet for a moment.

"I think it's because you relate a lot to a sad story and it describes your life so well that you get mesmerized in it. You finally feel understood. Others are going through the same struggles. But then they get a happy ending and- you don't.”

Jaemin’s fingers played with one of the threads of his shorts and you blinked at his unexpected words.

“It becomes a reminder of how your life could go if you were lucky like them. But you're not. That's when you can't relate anymore and it becomes even sadder. Instead of being a sort of relief, the happy ending is another punch in the gut, since I'll never be able to experience something like that,” he smiled after the last phrase as if he had just said that the best colour to decorate the cookies was blue.

Suddenly it felt as if the reality was altered.

Jaemin's face was a concentrated mask, trying to read other movies descriptions and you desperately wanted to touch it with your fingertips.

But you touched the back of his hand instead and Jaemin looked down at his thigh before looking up.

You didn’t know what expression you had on but the boy was so good at understanding people that you could have had a blank face and he would have known what you were feeling.

He smiled warmly at you and held your hand, squeezing it a little bit.

“I’m fine.” “It’s alright to be weak,” you almost talked on top of him. “Or to have desires.”

Jaemin opened his mouth and closed it a few times like a fish and you both jolted when the ding of the oven told that the cookies were baked.

The boy reluctantly let your hand go when you got up and walked towards the kitchen.

The smell was incredible and despite the weird saddened energy of the room, you both smiled at each other when locking eyes.

_____

Jaemin got used to your love language very quickly.

After cookies, came breakfast, and after that, it was the turn of a small gadget you found at the flea market.

“It’s so ugly that the first person I thought of was you.”

You still kept the insulting wall but Jaemin loved that part of you as well.

He ate your gratitude made of sweets and desserts, and looked at it in bed, rolling the little bald man made of wood on his palm.

A night Jaemin would think a lot about, was when you were hammered, bodies spread on the living room floor, eyes closed, soft music in the background to make the ambience less awkward. But you didn’t care about awkwardness as soon enough, the only thing your dizzy heads could think of was nothing at all.

With a wavering hand, Jaemin felt around him, searching for the bottle of “you’ve never tasted such good cognac before, I’m sure” cognac that Haechan sent him.

And the “Oh, perhaps I’m getting engaged :P”.

Jaemin stared at the note for a long time then stared at the bottle of amber liquid, his hands gripping it hard.

You took it from his hands before he could unreasonably smash it on the ground.

“Are you okay?”

The bottle was put down on the kitchen counter and Jaemin looked at it first then at your concerned eyes, as you’ve started to do more often lately.

Jaemin didn’t know what expression he had on but whatever it was, it made you take a few steps towards him when he didn’t reply.

“Yeah,” he breathed out after a little while, trying to put on his normal smile. But when you wrapped his waist with your arms he didn’t stop the tears falling silently on his cheeks.

He did not sob, nor wail. Jaemin just stood there, arms unable to hug you back. And when you dragged him by the hand, the bottle under your arm, making him sit down on the floor, he just obliged.

“Let’s drink to that.”

And Jaemin didn’t know if you meant his broken heart or Haechan’s happiness but he nodded and took a sip of the sweet drink. The bottle travelled back and forth between you until you couldn’t sit up anymore.

Lying down, the sun setting, the same few songs playing on a loop since no one had the energy to change the playlist, Jaemin couldn’t find the bottle anymore so he just grabbed your hand instead.

You didn’t say anything and intertwined your fingers with his, mind circling the spot Jaemin’s thumb was circling on your skin.

"I feel like people love me for how I make them feel.”

The boy’s voice was hoarse and it made your chest tingle.

You listened, squeezing his hand as to invite him to go on.

“I know everything about them. I know how to make them feel good. I listen and I love. I love a lot.”

“You do.”

Jaemin swallowed hard.

You didn’t have to look to know that his cheeks were wet again.

“I tried to be perfect. So I could be loved back.”

“You don’t have to do that. You just got an example of that not working very well anyway.”

A sniff.

“I know. But the little amount I still get now, would it be there if I didn’t try as hard as I’m trying right now? Would people care about me if I wasn't perfect? Would they love me if I didn't do what they need me to? Honestly, I'm terrified to find out.”

You sighed and let his hand go, rolling on your stomach and lifting your bust on our forearms to be able to look at Jaemin.

The boy opened his reddened eyes and tilted his head to the side to meet your gaze.

“If you try so hard and still get so little, you don’t need that love.”

Jaemin blinked once, listening to your soothing voice, the evening breeze lightly swooshing his hair spread around his head.

“As you said, they probably still love you for how you make them feel and not for how you are,” and Jaemin visibly flinched at the hard truth. “But,” you grabbed his hand again, not wanting to let him despair, “there are also people that love you because of who you are, even if you confuse them with those that love you for what you do. And I’m sure Haechan is one of them, it just didn’t go well.” “It didn’t have to go well. It has never been something that could go. It’s just my fault that-” but you shushed him pulling at his hand as to make him stop talking. “You can still admit that he hurt you. He didn’t do it on purpose but it’s not your fault either. And it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care about you. Sometimes you can try very hard and people would still not care in the same way that you do, and it’s alright. It’s not you. It’s them.”

Jaemin kept his eyes closed as you talked, his chest rising with deep breaths and you placed a hand on it just like he did to you before.

“Do you like me?”

His question took you by surprise.

“You can say no. I’m sorry, I’m putting a lot of pressure on you right now-” “I do.”

The boy opened his eyes, staring at you from underneath his long lashes. “Why?”

You stared down at your intertwined fingers. The truth was that you also liked him for how he made you feel. He never snapped, he accepted you, he tried hard to get to you and it was something that you’ve never experienced before. But what does that also mean about him?

“Because you’re a beautiful human being.”

Jaemin’s eyes widened imperceptibly.

“You’re kind and patient and so sweet. And I know that it looks as if I’m saying only the stuff that has to do with me, like, you’re kind with me, and patient with me and sweet with me. But honestly, I would have liked you even if you were like that with other people and not with me.”

You looked up at his face and bit your lower lip. “Also, would you not like me if I understood you the way you understand others? Would that be only loving the way I make you feel? Would that be a bad thing?” “It’s a bad thing only if you were kind to me only to be loved back when in reality you’re not.” “Yeah. And you’re not doing that, are you? You think you’re not deserving of love without trying to be kind but you’re naturally like that, Jaemin. You’re just unhealthily pushing yourself sometimes. It’s not like you’d stop being kind if you stopped trying. Because you’re already kind. And people will love you the same.”

The boy didn’t add anything to that.

He pulled you by the hand until you softly landed on his chest and wrapped your body with his arms.

You could feel his quick heartbeat under your chest and he probably could feel yours. His warm breath caressed your forehead until you fell asleep.

_____

The day after, Jaemin was the usual boy.

His teeth were the first thing you saw when you woke up with a groan. “Good morning.”

You furrowed your eyebrows when your eyes focus on the background. “What the hell am I doing in your bed?”

Jaemin giggled and tugged your body against his, making you realize that he has been hugging you the whole time.

“Let me go!” you tried to escape but Jaemin didn’t budge.

“We’re just cuddling,” his muffled voice on the sweatshirt you were wearing sounded whiny and sleepy.

“Why are we cuddling? What the fuck happened last night?”

Your body stiffened when Jaemin threw a leg on your hips like a koala.

“Nothing. We got drunk and cried, then we fell asleep on the floor.”

You waited.

“And then I woke up and took ourselves on my bed where we cuddled some more until falling asleep again.”

You waited some more.

“There’s something you’re not telling me, Jaemin.” The boy raised his face from your shoulder to show you his innocent puppy eyes. “Like what?” “Like why I have nothing on besides your hoodie.”

Jaemin’s face lit up in a bright smile and he hid his face into you again as if shy.

“You were thirsty and drank water from the tap.”

“And?” you were losing all of your patience while your cheeks heated up.

“And your clothes got all wet.”

“Jaemin, for fuck’s sake, talk normally. Did you undress me?”

The boy shook his head. “You took them off by yourself,” he paused. “While trying to give me a lap dance.”

You choked on air and tried to cover your face with your hands, but Jaemin’s koala arms prevented you from doing so.

What the fuck. What the actual fuck.

“But you just took your clothes off and fell on me. Nothing happened. I forced you to wear my hoodie. Then you wanted to cuddle and we fell asleep as you kept saying how pretty my eyelashes are.”

Oh my God.

“And that’s it?” you asked with a little voice.

Jaemin looked at you again and his face was so close that you felt as if on fire, the thought of being naked in front of him and doing stuff you couldn’t remember at all.

“Yeah, unfortunately.”

You hit him on the forehead and as he giggled, hands pressing on the spot, you could free yourself and run away in your room.

It was something you would have never imagined, the feeling between your legs.

You breathed in and out, trying to calm yourself, but your skin still remembered where Jaemin’s hands were placed just seconds ago. And his breath on your neck. And your eyes couldn’t get rid of his sunlit chocolate eyes.

Oh, fuck.

This shouldn’t have happened.

You didn’t predict this happening at all and it made you go crazy just like the heat spreading through your body as your hand slipped down your stomach. You didn’t think. Your mind was blank and your fingers moved on their own, teeth biting your lower lip, knees buckling until your frame slipped on the door and meeting the floor. Legs open and back pressed onto the hard wood, you closed your eyes and gasped, hoping that Jaemin’s hangover ears could not hear you.

_____

Jaemin loved how things started to go between you. Bad mannered and moody, you still snapped at him but didn’t run away when he would laugh and pull you into his arms.

Perhaps Jaemin was making a mistake. The same mistake all over again.

Perhaps he was giving and giving, thinking the other party felt the same, but he didn’t care anymore. That’s how he was. He wasn’t trying. He felt like hugging you and kissing your forehead just to hear your scream, loving the little smile blooming on your lips when you thought he wasn’t looking.

He bathed into your silent affection and soon your affection became something else he wouldn’t have expected.

“I think you should stay at home.”

Jaemin adjusted his raincoat with furrowed eyebrows. You were standing near the wall of the corridor and watched him about to go out in the pouring rain.

“Jaemin. There’s a storm outside. Your friend can just call a tow truck or something.”

The boy has been in a rare bad mood for a little while that day and when he heard that his friend got a flat tire his mood didn’t get any better. And now, with you looking at him as if he was doing something wrong when his conscience was telling him it was the right choice made him unreasonable angry. Because he knew that he should probably listen to you.

“I know.”

You huffed. “Then tell him to go fuck himself and stay home.” Jaemin let his shoe fall down on the floor annoyed. “Why do you care so much suddenly?” and while saying it he was already regretting it but was unable to stop. “You’ve hated me since day one and now you care about my well-being?”

You tightened your lips. “I don’t hate you. I thought-- you understood.”

Your vulnerability made Jaemin close his eyes for a second. “Fuck, I do. I always do. I understand everyone and I hate it.”

Sudden lighting made his face spectral and you took a step back.

“Just stop being a human mat and stop doing stuff you don’t want to do. We’ve talked about this before, haven’t we?”

If the boy was cooling down, that phrase took it all out of the window.

“You think it’s easy? Why don’t you stop saying no to everything and start being kinder then? We’ve talked about that as well. You can’t do it either.”

“I bet I can go one day with saying yes to everything but you can’t go a day by saying no or doing what you want instead of what other people want,” you dared him.

Jaemin scoffed. “Yeah, sure. I would want to see that.”

You crossed your arms on your chest determined. “Okay. Starting from this moment I’m going to say yes. What about you? Are you going to refuse people and do what you want? I don’t think so.”

Jaemin stared at you for a split second and his expression became one you’ve never seen him wear before. With a fluid movement, he filled the space between you until your faces were a breath away from each other. “I want to fuck you. How about that?”

You almost gasped as you stared at his dark eyes, the storm outside the window giving him an even more dangerous aura.

Gulping down, your mind started to run and search for an appropriate answer, but it wasn’t necessary as your lips betrayed you by forming a quiet “okay, deal.”

Jaemin’s pupils trembled as if he was surprised himself, yet his hands were quick, stripping him of his raincoat, letting it fall to his feet.

“The safe word is,” he whispered slowly, “forest.”

You swallowed again, feeling your throat suddenly dry, then you chuckled trying to mask your nervousness.

“Okay, but forest? Really? That’s very stupid-,” but you couldn't complete your shaky sentence as you found yourself dragged towards the bedroom and knocked on the bed in a second, ass up in the air with Jaemin’s hands on it. “Stupid?” he asked irritated. “Start fucking counting.” You shivered even though your blood felt like boiling. Not in a thousand years, you would have expected Jaemin to manhandle you like that.

Spank.

A little yelp, more because of the surprise than the actual pain since your thick jeans didn’t really allow for much friction, escaped your lips. “One.” Your voice was trembling. “Good girl,” Jaemin’s voice was almost a deep whisper.

Spank.

“T-two,” you stuttered as Jaemin increased the force.

Spank.

You whined. “Three.” “God, I’ve wanted to do this the first time you left your dirty stuff in the sink and refused to clean up.”

Spank.

“F-four. So you’re actually able to feel human emotions such as anger, huh?” you chuckled breathlessly.

Spank. You moaned and your panties started to get too wet and hot for your liking.

No five could come out of your lips as Jaemin grabbed your arms and rolled you over on your back. His eyes were full of fire and you felt your core tingle as he got on the bed as well, kneeling between your open legs, resting his weight on his hands pressed on each side of your head. “I’m going to stuff you up so hard. Let’s see if you’ll be able to talk back again, princess.” You were about to chuckle, pretending that his words didn’t affect you, but you lost it at the pet name. A little gasp left your lips in the form of a single breath and Jaemin got even closer as if catching it. “Oh, you like it? You want to be called like that?” he teased you. You gulped nervously and nodded. “Then I won’t do it,” he whispered, mouths almost touching. You raised your head to connect his lips with yours but Jaemin pulled away with a laugh until you couldn’t reach him anymore. Then he got closer again when you rested your head down. “Wanna kiss me?” his voice caressed your ears just the way one of his hands started to draw little circles down your neck. You turned your head to the side, giving him more space. “Hm?” he asked while the tip of his tongue traced the outline of your ear. You shivered at the sensation. “Yeah, wanna kiss you,” you replied, remembering the dare, even though, you realized with deep shame, you would have answered positively anyways. Jaemin’s soft chuckle added to the sensation growing between your legs and you would have rubbed them together if Jaemin’s bust weren’t there, so close to your core yet so far away. “Ask me nicely,” he ordered. You bit your lower lip and looked up at him, trying to flirt back, maybe making Jaemin weak the way he was making you feel. But the boy’s smile never flattered. “Do you not want to kiss me?” you fluttered your eyelashes. Jaemin shook his head. “No.” “I want to kiss you so badly though,” you tried again. “Sounds like a you problem.” “Okay, so you’re not actually able to feel human emotions,” you dropped the sugary tone. “This is pretty human in my book,” he lowered his hips grinding on you, his hard cock making you jolt even through the layers of clothes. “I have to do what I want right? Then I want to fuck you until there’s no trace of that attitude left, but on my terms,” and you would have replied if Jaemin didn’t rise on his knees again, looking at you sprawled in front of him like a full meal and if his hands didn’t go to your waistband, unbuttoning your pants and roughly dragging them down. Your legs fell on the bed like dead weight after the jeans were thrown somewhere in the room. Jaemin got between them again but not to do what you hoped he would. Instead, he reached on the shelves behind you and you recognized the sound before seeing the object: a pair of shiny metal handcuffs. Your eyes widened at the sight and Jaemin chuckled. “You want me to tie you up?” you tried to joke, knowing damn well that they weren’t for his wrists. Jaemin ignored your useless question and handcuffed you, tugging at the chain connecting your hands, making you whine as he hooked it to a nail above your head. You looked up, blaming yourself for not noticing it sooner and shivered at the sudden realization that Jaemin had probably done it very often. A little fear of what he might do to you crept in the back of your mind but instead of spreading panic through your body, it spread a wave of pleasure, collecting itself in a single pulsating point between your legs. “Tell me the truth. It’s the first time you’re not the one tied to the bed, right?” you teased him. “No, but it does look like it’s your first time, isn’t it, love?” his eyes were sweet and kind, the usual look Jaemin would give you in the morning or before going to bed, yet it changed in a second as he calmly slipped his fingers on your hips, getting under your panties and dragging them down your thighs. He twirled them around his finger a few times, the tip of his tongue moisturizing his dry lips as he drank in the view of your spread legs. “You’re not taking off this?” you tried to drift his attention to your face instead, shimming your bust as to indicate what you were talking about, suddenly very shy of you being so exposed to him and definitely not used to the look on his face. But Jaemin didn’t budge. He still stared where he wanted, as if almost caressing you with his gaze as he replied. “It would be a shame. That’s my hoodie, isn’t it? Tell me,” he got closer, hovering over you, finally looking at you in the eyes, making you regret that he wasn’t looking away as before, “does it still have my perfume on? Were you thinking about me today just as you touched yourself that time while wearing it?” he purred and chuckled at your shocked expression. “This apartment has very thin walls, angel. But if it makes you feel better, I’ll tell you my little secret as well, yeah?” You nodded breathlessly. “I was fucking my fist to your pretty moans as well, thinking about your sweet lips wrapped around my cock,” he rubbed his thumb on your lower lip, making you open your mouth as if about to kiss you, then smirked. “What about you? Were you thinking about this-” he let his hand fall from your face down your body until reaching between your legs, touching your wet core with two fingers, dragging them up and down slowly. You jolted, inhaling sharply at the feeling, eyes unable to stay open. “-or maybe this?” his voice was a whisper as his fingertips circled your clit, snapping a whine out of you. His shiny necklace was dangling in front of your face, then it laid on your chest as he got closer and pressed his lips on your neck, sucking your skin in, playing with it with his tongue. “Was it perhaps this?” he spoke again as he easily slipped his middle finger inside of you. The wet sounds of him pumping your pussy made you even more aroused and it probably had the same effect on Jaemin since a little low growl roared in his chest. He slipped another finger in. “Do you hear it? So wet and all for me,” his hot breath ghosted your ear. “Jaemin, please,” you mumbled, the building up sensation keeping you on the edge but not enough to grow to what your gut needed. Jaemin raised his bust and sat down on his heels with a cocky smile, looking at the way his fingers disappeared inside you, glistening with your juices. “You’re in no position to ask for anything, angel,” he reminded you calmly. “But I appreciate the please. Now, let’s learn to say thank you as well, shall we?” You whined, rocking your hips against his hand, urging him to go faster. The boy raised an eyebrow at your eagerness and let himself down on his elbows between your legs. “Do you want to feel my tongue?” “Yes, yes, please,” you replied, all of your pride out of the window. “Like this?” he licked your inner thigh. You protested and it only made Jaemin more amused. “Sorry, like this?” he drew a line on one of your lips, so close yet so far. “Jaemin, I’ll fucking make you pay,” you spoke through your teeth and Jaemin clicked his tongue as if disappointed, retrieving his fingers from you and leaving you all empty. “No, no, no,” you wailed, eyes wide staring at him. “What was that? Did I hear some-” he cupped his ear with one hand in a playful act, “-attitude?” “Shit, Jaemin, you said you’re going to fuck the attitude out of me, yet here you are, not doing anything to me.” Jaemin’s smile disappeared in a second leaving space for a dark expression. Usually, he would have continued to smile, but this Jaemin was a different person. “Oh, be careful what you wish for, angel,” he whispered and dove into your core, not leaving you a single second to breathe in properly. You moaned hard feeling his quick tongue, curling your toes and tugging at the handcuffs keeping your arms painfully above your head. “Oh oh- fuck me,” and he did it, lapping at your wetness, fingers shoved back inside of you, quick to find your sweet spot thanks to your increasing moans guiding his movements. His name on your whiny lips probably made him insane since he started to move even quicker, so quick to make you arch your back, not stopping even when you started to uncontrollably shake, coming all over his tongue. Your legs tried to get together but Jaemin didn’t agree with that, slapping your thighs away his with free hand and diving back in, sucking on your clit as if nothing happened. You cried out and mumbled something about stopping but Jaemin didn’t accept anything besides the safe word. Deaf to your protests, he ravaged you until hearing your loud whimpers again, this time shaking so hard that the bed frame moved with you, your wrists hurting as you tugged at the handcuffs again. Only then Jaemin lifted himself on his knees again, breathless, your juices wetting his lips and chin, a thin layer of sweat matting his fringe to the forehead. “How are we feeling, baby?” he grabbed the collar of his t-shirt and undressed himself, revealing one of the best bodies you’ve seen in real life. Unable to speak, still coming down from your high, you just stared at him, fucked numb, and he still didn’t even put his cock to good use yet. “Good,” Jaemin seemed satisfied as he caressed his abs, going down to the waistband of his grey sweats with a slow movement. He teased you like that for a second, loving the way your eyes were trained on his hard one. “You want it?” he asked with a smirk, palming it and outlining its form. “Yes,” you managed to say. Jaemin clicked his tongue. “You’re back to speaking now. Better do something about it,” he commented and took off his bottoms alongside his boxers. In a single movement, your legs were around his waist and the tip of his cock was tasting your entrance. Jaemin moved it up and down with his hand, spreading your abundant juices on it, making you almost whimper with expectation before finally filling you up slowly with a deep grunt. And you felt every centimetre of it, stretching you out, making the air leave your lungs in the same moment until you felt it hit far inside where no cock has possibly touched before. “Shit-” Jaemin whispered as you moaned, slowly making more space inside your tight walls by swiftly rolling his hips. He didn’t need to keep the pace low for a long time though as you quickly adjusted to his girth, high pitched pleasure whimpers leaving your rough throat instead of pained ones. Jaemin swore again, thrusting every time faster, grabbing your legs and putting them on his shoulders, hitting it from a better angle. "Louder, baby. I want to hear your moans." You bit your lower lip, the remnants of your brattiness lingering on your tongue. "Then make me moan, Jaemin-," and in that second you realized that you've fucked up. Jaemin descended in a breath, making your thighs touch your chest, one of his hands deeply pressed into the pillow, the other tightened around your throat. He was quick. Oh, he was so quick you felt like you were about to go blind. "Like this? Huh?" the creak of the bed and the slapping of the skin almost covering his teeth spoken questions. When you came you felt your eyes roll back and Jaemin finally let you inhale, oxygenating your fucked out brain. Little pleas slipped your trembling lips, imitating your shaking muscles. But Jaemin didn't stop until you felt his hot cum spurting deep inside of you, making you clench hard around him, finally hearing his choked moans as well. His hips moved and moved until you begged. “Jaemin, Jaem- I can’t, I can’t take this anymore." “You know what to say, angel. A single word and I’ll stop,” he reminded you. You bit your lower lip, staring at him in the eyes. “Oh, so you like it that much, huh? Like - a - little - slut," he accompanied each of his last four words with a deep thrust. "Your tight little pussy can’t take it anymore but you still want it, isn’t that right, princess? You like to be used like this, just as I please. You’re filled up so much that it’s dripping out, baby. Would you let me use your other pretty holes as well?” “Fuck, Jaemin, you’re driving me crazy,” you whined, a few warm tears collecting to the sides of your eyes. “Oh, my baby is crying because it’s that good? Do you love it? You want more of my cock, right?” he cooed sweetly. “Yes, yes, please,” you squirmed underneath him. “No,” he shook his head amused slipping out of your hot pussy, slapping your clit with his tip. You jolted and tugged at the handcuffs. Jaemin smiled and jerked his cock between your legs. "Oh, fuck," his voice darkened as his fingers wrapped his glistening cock, fucking himself while looking at your abused pussy. He was so hot, with strands of wet hair to hide his eyes, open red lips to let out deep grunts and his abs flinching when his thumb would press into the tip of his cock that a little whine escaped your lips. "Give it to me." Jaemin looked up at your begging face with a smirk, hand not slowing down at all. "Where do you want it?" You let your tongue out and you could visibly see the moment during which Jaemin forced a moan down his throat. In a second your arms were down and you sighed relieved as he silently unlocked the handcuffs. But you didn't live that pleasurable moment for long that your bruised wrists were grabbed again to make you stand up on your knees in front of him. Jaemin looked at your face for a short while, almost tenderly, eyes darting from your eyes to your lips, before he gripped your head and forced your on all fours, his other hand keeping his cock aligned to your face. You whimpered at the sudden movement but opened your mouth, looking up at Jaemin, waiting for him to do whatever he wanted to you. And he did just that. A choked moan vibrated up his length as he thrust on your tongue, making you taste yourself and his cum at once. Jaemin hummed once then whined, stopping the air inside his nose as if choking before releasing it with through his open mouth and it was so sexy that you desired to listen to his sounds forever. And they got louder as you bobbed your head, his hands loosely gripping your face before palming your shoulders and back, going further until reaching your ass and grabbing it, kneading your soft flesh, shoving himself even further inside your throat. Overstimulated, it took him less time to cum the second time and you loved it how briefly at your mercy he was when you let his cock out, a little string of saliva connecting your tongue to his tip, jerking him off until feeling his seed paint your face. "So fucking hot, fuck-," he groaned, staring down at your expression until you milked him all up.

Both breathless you just looked at each other until a little smile broke on your lips. He followed suit and chuckled, one trembling hand searching for his t-shirt to clean you up.

"Wait," he said when you sat up, putting one finger to your cheek and sucking it clean.

"Delicious," you raised one eyebrow. "Yeah, I bet," Jaemin replied sarcastic one hand sliding on your jaw while the other cleaned up your cheeks. You closed your eyes with a smile and waited for him to be done, not expecting the little peck he places on your lips.

When you opened your eyes surprised, Jaemin continued to pat your skin as if nothing happened.

"What was that?" you inquired.

The boy blinked at you innocently. "You had something on your lips."

Your smile grew. "And it's all off now? I think there's some left. Wanna check?"

Jaemin let the t-shirt go on the side in that instant and kissed you deeply, almost making you fall on your back. It was soft and careful, yet so intense that if you wouldn't have felt so spent it would have turned you on again. And maybe you still could go on for a while because when Jaemin tilted your head to the side and circled your tongue with his, you could have sworn that the heat between your legs came back stronger than ever.

"Wait here," he whispered on your skin and got up, letting you admire the back view until he disappeared outside the room.

With a deep sigh, you let yourself fall on the bed again, stretching your sore muscles, the realization that you've just had some mad sex slowly creeping in.

When Jaemin came back you were almost drifting to sleep, lulled by the sound of the rain.

"Come." A little whine rolled out of your lips as you opened your eyes again. Jaemin smiled looking at you for a few moments before sliding his arms under your knees and waist.

"Jaemin, wait, no-," you jolted awake but not being able to do anything besides wrapping your arms around his neck. "You can't carry me-," but he shushed you and in a few moments you were already in the bathroom, the hot water still filling the bathtub.

He put you down and held your waist when you realized your legs were still wobbly and helped you step inside the soapy water. When he followed suit, placing himself behind you and pulling you towards him, you felt your cheeks on fire.

"You alright?" he whispered, hands already trained on your body, massaging your body softly.

You nodded and inhaled sharply as he traced your bust with two fingers, going down between your legs. "Jaemin-," your thighs closed around his wrist while your face pressed on his bicep to your left.

His soft chuckle brushed against your temple. "I'm not doing anything. Just cleaning you out," he had the courage to say. When you arched your back he retrieved his hand and grabbed a soft loofah. With gentle and careful strokes, he passed it on your skin starting from the chest and shoulders then going down on your torso, giving a little bit too much attention to your breasts. Too turned on but also embarrassed about him washing you up, you could just stare at the way the bubbly water dripped on your skin and when he ordered you to turn around, you couldn't bear to look at him in the eyes. Hands on our ankles, as you rested your back to the other side of the tub, he worked your legs up slowly, enjoying the view and your shy expression maybe too much.

"You're so beautiful," he commented in a low, playful tone and you felt like asking him to get you off for the nth time that night.

Perhaps it showed on your face or maybe he could read minds, but when he reached your inner thighs, he let he loofah float and touched you with his fingers, pulling you towards him until you straddled his lap.

"The bet is off now. You can insult me just like before," he smirked while his fingers made their way between your aching folds.

The breath you inhaled was shaky and you had to press your forehead against his, your hands restless on his wet shoulders.

"I wasn't like that because of the bet," you confessed and Jaemin's pupils visibly trembled while his lips curved in a little smile. "And I'm not like this now because of it either."

A low sound vibrated in Jaemin's chest before he whispered against your open mouth.

"So you saying that you're actually a good girl?"

You nodded, unable to speak as the boy's fingers picked up the pace on your clit.

"I know," he placed a peck on the corner of your mouth, "you're such a good girl," a peck on your jaw, "especially for me" a peck on your neck.

You exhaled with a whine and let your head fall back, digging your nails into his skin, finally being able to touch him as you've wanted to do before. Jaemin took the opportunity to let his lips descend to your nipples, sucking them inside the warmth of his mouth, twirling the buds with his wet tongue until it was unbearable for you to not moan his name uncontrollably.

Your body was all mush when you came again with an almost scream, pulling his head against your chest until his fingertips left your throbbing clit and traced your thigh, going around it and palming your ass. When you finally unclenched your arms from around his neck, he looked up from between the swell of your breasts with a soft giggle.

"Sorry," you mumbled but he shook his head, a kind of adoration in his eyes that you've never seen before.

"I loved it-," he started but stopped abruptly afterwards, as if not wanting to let the words aching on his tongue to roll freely.

You sat down deeper on his thighs until your eyes were at the same level.

"And?" you touched his chest slowly, fingers still trembling from the high.

He swallowed, mind running at an incredibly high speed reflected in his suddenly troubled eyes.

"And I think that-- fuck, I might love you as well."

Oh.

It made your whole body shake again.

Jaemin noticed and you wondered what kind of expression you had on to make him look so worried all of a sudden.

"Is it too much? Too soon?" he cupped your face with one hand.

You couldn't look him in the eyes. "I don't know-- I just-"

Jaemin shushed you. "It's alright. You don't have to do or say anything."

You shook your head and raised your gaze. "I just- I really want to let myself go and believe it."

The boy stayed silent for a moment as if wondering what his next words should be and you hated it. Nights and nights of talking freely with him made you understand how refreshing it was to be yourself and not walk on eggshells around people. And you knew that Jaemin felt the same. Seeing him now, delicate fingers on your skin as if afraid to break you, made your heart ache.

"You care too much, Jaemin. Don't worry about me like this. We've talked about it."

Jaemin briefly licked his lower lip. "How can I not care about you when no one has cared about you before?"

And you choked on the amount of tears that suddenly made your vision blurry.

The boy pulled you towards him and you rested your forehead on his shoulder. "I know," he talked with a shaky voice, "I know I'm too kind and all that stuff and everything you've said is true, I need to change for my own sake, but-," his arms held you even more tightly, "not when it comes to you. I want to be like that with you. And I'm going to change, yes, I'll say no and refuse to do things people ask of me if this is what you want."

His words didn't make your sobs slow down but you raised your face and touched his cheeks.

"Then I want you to care about yourself the way you care about me, Jaemin."

"I care about myself now, because you care about me."

You chuckled. "That's still doing stuff for other people." Jaemin smiled and stroked your under eye with his thumbs. "It's not for other people. It's for you. Because I love you, Y/N."

You bit your lower lip as a new tide of tears announced their way.

“I never said I care about you though,” your lower lip trembled after you let it go. “You don’t have to say it.” “I hate you.” “Yeah,” he kissed your lips. “And I don’t like cuddles and I don’t like breakfast.” “Yeah,” he kissed you again.

And again.

Until you didn’t let him go anymore and he was sure of being loved back.

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