#stede's a whole fucking disaster of a human and it makes sense to me that he sucks at this stuff
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(click to enlarge. there wasn’t room on the meme for me to make the disclaimer that yes obviously a big portion of stede’s obliviousness is straight up born from being a wealthy white dude with no real-world experience and i’d never discount that.
i just think it makes sense that he sucks at actually communicating and that he’s used to not thinking about other perspectives, and i think it makes sense that through meeting ed, who likes and wants to get to know him off the bat, he does improve his social game on the ship enough to be accepted and protected by his crew in the end
and also that any take on stede that states he sees himself as important is wild to me when it couldn’t clearly be farther off from what canon shows us about him.)
#ofmd#our flag means death#stede bonnet#he didn't think i was supposed to be a lighthouse to my family they must surely be lost without me#he thought i was supposed to be that and i couldnt and i am a failure who couldnt even talk to them about it i ruin everything#does he make decisions that negatively impact the people around him without communicating first? god yeah#but its more likely to come from a place of low self worth#men who think they are important and valuable dont agree that they defile everything they touch and stand still to allow their own murder#anyway idk i keep thinking about this lately#stede's a whole fucking disaster of a human and it makes sense to me that he sucks at this stuff#even set aside from his obvious class privilege#he does not FIT in that society he learned it was easier on him to stop TRYING to improve in that a long time ago#he's fucked over by inexperience and toxic masculinity telling him all the things that he Should Be#he was never going to be a cool involved husband to mary he was never going to risk reaching back when she reached out#(and i mean at that point reaching back out would have meant staying and i think by then he was kinda at his limit)#im not saying he's right in how he goes about stuff like fully the opposite he makes some shit choices#i'm just saying i'm tired of the lack of nuance#he knows textbook manners textbook etiquette and doesn't know what healthy relationships look like or feel like
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