#source : welcome to the black parade

[spittingoutthebloodandscreaming]

My Chemical Romance at the Verizon Wireless Arena, 22/02/2007, taken by placeofsecrets on livejournal

[hollyoongs]

⤷ MY BABY LIKE TO STRING ME US ON!

시놉시스┆ 𝙟ake𝗵͢oon, ─────⠀f!reader 𓂅 𝑤.𝑐: +9.9k ꒰ ⌗ smut with plot ꒱ ↷⠀ ℰditoral ! 𓂂

─────⠀cursing, kissing, protected sex, oral (male and female), choking, use of lube (lots of it), fingering (anal and vaginal), double penetration, pet names (baby, princess, pretty, doll, etc), dirty talk (brief), daddy kink, praise kink, spanking (one time, if I remember correctly), squirting and let me know if I missed anything.

You looked at your watch; you could feel the excitement going through your veins as the time went by. After months of saving every penny you could get from your part-time job, you could finally afford tickets to a rock concert of your favorite band, Crimson Eclipse.

The concert had been on your mind for months ever since you saw the post of their official account; your brain was filled with fantasies of screaming along to their songs and losing yourself in the sea of fans, recording every now and then as you could feel your throat hurt from all the singing. And here you were, front row, right in the center. The venue was packed already; people were simply taking selfies, preparing the handmade banners they held, or running to the bathroom, the muffled sound of soundchecks echoing faintly through the heavy doors that made the place more pumped up. You adjusted your outfit—a mini black dress with an oversized leather jacket. It was not the best outfit for a concert, knowing that you would be jumping, and the boots with heels you were wearing also didn’t help at all, but that actually didn’t matter. It was your favorite band’s concert, and you were going to go all out.

You shook your head to erase any negative thoughts and took a picture of the spot you were in, the screen focusing on the stage, and you smiled, already knowing how worth it it was to pay for the first-row ticket. You’ve been a fan of them ever since you saw that recommended video of them at the ripe age of fourteen doing a cover of “Welcome to the Black Parade,” and you were still here, eight, almost nine, years later. It made you proud how far they have gone, winning awards and gaining a lot of recognition and fame, but you saw how they didn’t lose themselves or start disliking what they do, music.

The lights went out, surprising everyone who thought there had been a technical failure, but soon that was cleared by the sound of an electric guitar that alerted you, followed by excited screams that made everyone look around to find the source of the sound. This was the first (and hopefully, last) time the first row was conspiring on your contrary; at least, you could get a view thanks to the heels.

Two guys appeared, and you could help but scream at the very familiar shadow of the dynamic duo, Jay and Sunghoon. The two of them were rocking a new look, black hair, standing back-to-back under a soft spotlight that made them stand out. Both of them moved in different directions, Jay—sporting his signature eyebrow piercing—heading toward the first rows, all this while playing without missing a beat, drawing cheers from the audience. Soon after that small intro, the lights on them vanished, and so did they.

A new spotlight illuminated another person, this time, Heeseung, on the stage. He also had a new hairstyle, silver hair to be exact, with his guitar slung across him. He played with the microphone in his hand, his tongue tracing his lips, a small habit he had whenever he was about to sing that you found endearing the majority of the time. Key word, majority of the time.

"Put your loving hand out, baby…" he sang, all the spotlights coming on to point at the performers.

You glanced at the stage, Jake’s shirtless body welcoming everyone as he was playing with drumsticks, the flirty smirk popping out immediately at the cheer while Jay stood on top of the speakers.

Your loose hair was brushed aside delicately, the touch of unfamiliar lips on your shoulder trailing lower beneath my jaw, making you turn, ready to yell at whoever it was to not let you peacefully check on them, but the words froze in your throat when you realized it was Sunghoon. His lips moved closer to your ear as the cameras of several cellphones were pointed at you, recording the fan service you were receiving.

"I’m beggin’……"

Fuck, fuck, fuck. That was the only word running through your mind as you watched the guy walk away from your side and head to the stage with a smirk on his face, most likely pleased by your reaction.

“Fuck, you’re so lucky!” A girl next to you screamed, but you didn’t pay any attention to the glow of her phone recording your dumbfounded expression, too busy processing what just happened. Sunghoon was now standing behind the microphone, his fingers skillfully moving across the bass strings, still wearing that superior smirk that was quickly erased to focus on playing the right chords. Your gaze shifted behind him, and you were hit with a wave of surprise—and an even stronger wave of heat on your cheeks.

Jake was looking at everyone there, soon laying his eyes on you, his exposed tattoos making you trace them with your eyes; sometimes you couldn’t even see them properly because of either one, his flexed arms were moving rhythmically and passionately as he was playing the instrument, or two, that made you lose yourself in the song. His tongue peeked out slightly as he winked at someone in the crowd—or one of the members, occasionally. The piercing in the middle of his lips caught the light, a new piercing.

Yeah, they were going to be your reason to not be alive.

You could physically feel every note they played vibrate through your body—it was the reason why your body matched the energy the band radiated through jumping and singing every lyric. You had only heard the songs through your headphones at a very concerning volume, and even then, their songs caught and captivated you that another band has never done before. But now, performing right in front of you, completely live and giving their all to every song of the setlist, was like entering a whole new world.

The songs were hypnotizing, and they were unstoppable.

You couldn’t define a word to describe Heeseung, but one close to your way of thinking was striking. His black-polished nails contrasting against the silver rings on his fingers and his red microphone in his hands. The butterfly tattoo he recently got on his neck drew the eye, and his gaze never left the crowd, ensuring no one felt left out. You truly can wrap your head around the fact of someone having such charisma; it could be the fact that he was made for the stage, to project everything he had on his mind and connect with people with an ease that seemed almost otherworldly.

Jay, who was dressed in leather and chains with his dark hair falling into his eyes, was the one who brought fire to every performance. Matter of fact, everybody did, but he has this power that pulls the crowd with a single word; his guitar solos could make any room fall silent in awe due to his confidence because, to the fans, every single note he played was a piece of his past, present, and future woven into the strings of his guitar, making even the loudest venues feel intimate, letting them know that it wasn’t only technique but emotion and honesty.

Sunghoon can’t be left out, his hair slicked back, and his ripped jeans left little to the imagination, especially paired with his sleeveless shirt that showed off his defined muscles. He was a whole visual, but his passion for the music and how he can get things done was what made him him. He couldn’t simply exist in the background; he was intensity and precision incarnate, making his stage presence wasn’t about flash—it was about power. It didn’t matter if his fingers danced across the strings, if his voice was being for backup vocals or main; it was that fire in his eyes that was the proof that passion and love could be silent but deafening at the same time.

And Jake, funny enough, he was the heartbeat of the band, his hands always a blur as they commanded the drums with power and precision, channeling the rhythm that kept everything—and everyone—together. His perpetually messy blonde hair with his loose pants, low enough that they showed the ‘Calvin Klein’ elastic, and no shirt was a statement, as if he didn’t need to try hard to turn heads. He was dynamic, a force of nature on stage that was so effortless yet impactful that it made no doubt why he was one of the best artists, along with his brothers.

As you saw all of them three smiling and soaking in the moment, it popped to your mind that they were one of the few bands that weren’t just performing; they were living, breathing, and thriving under the stage lights, and their presence demanded attention, not because they forced it, but because it was impossible to look away. And you would make sure to give them all your attention with proud tears in your eyes.

You could feel your throat getting sore by the minute because of screaming along with the rest of the crowd; your feet were slightly hurting, though that was actually the least of your problems. About five—maybe eight—songs later, the band took a well-deserved break. Everyone started to take out their phones, including yourself, the moment you all saw Heeseung raising his hands to greet the crowd, flashing his perfect row of teeth that had more than a few people sighing in love.

“Good evening, everyone. Thank you for coming to our show tonight. Are you having a good time?” he asked. The crowd erupted with various affirmative responses, making the band smile. “That’s a relief to hear. If it’s your first time here, let me introduce ourselves. My name is Heeseung, and I’m the main vocalist and guitarist. To my left is our incredible bassist, Sunghoon; our star guitarist, Jay; and behind us, the best drummer I’ve ever met in my fucking life, Jake.” Each member greeted the crowd in their own way, gaining all the cheers from everyone in the venue.

You turned to see Jake leaning against a speaker with Sunghoon, both of them wiping their sweaty bodies with small towels. The Australian's eyes found yours again, his smirk widening as he caught you staring. He mouthed something—Well, hello there—before taking a swig from his water bottle, something that didn’t go unnoticed by a few fans there, and responding to him, tilting his head back in a way that made your knees weak. Sunghoon leaned in to say something to him, but Jake waved him off with a grin, his focus still locked on you.

“Before we get back to the set, this next song is really special to us; it’s really close to our hearts. Hope you all enjoy it.” Once again, the crowd cheered; now the light was slightly dimmed, leaving a soft blue glow to everyone, an unusual color to use since they only used red lights.

The moment the opening chords were heard, everyone realized it was a new song; you did a small zoom on your phone to only focus on the band, the crowd soon finding themselves swaying to the music, completely captivated by the unreleased song. In the middle of the song, Sunghoon had a bass solo where he got down to interact with the people, going from the back to the front, doing a few stops to interact with as many people as he could. By the time he approached the first row, he stopped in front of you.

Sunghoon knelt down right in front of you, the strap of his bass pressing against his chest as he played with ease, his fingers dancing over the strings and his gaze locking with yours. The corner of his lips quivered into a smirk when he saw the way your mouth hung slightly open, your awe written all over your face due to the talent he had. He leaned closer, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating off him, not minding the people feeling his exposed arms or grabbing his chest, only you.

Your breath hitched as his smirk got a little wider. Before you could react, he straightened up, still playing, and gave you a wink before moving down the line to interact with other fans. The crowd around went wild, but your heart was pounding too loudly in your ears to care; you laughed in disbelief, forcing yourself back to enjoy the slow rock song. The song ended, and soon, the familiar opening riff of “Karma” blasted through the speakers.

You held your phone high, capturing snippets of the band. Jay took center stage, shredding his guitar like it was an extension of himself, his sharp features illuminated by the flashing lights. Sunghoon and Heeseung joined him at the front; Jake, meanwhile, was behind the drum kit, keeping the tempo tight.

Song after song, the setlist didn’t let anyone down. Fan favorites like “Blockbuster” and “The Walls” both had the entire venue screaming all the lyrics back at them. By the time the band announced their last song, the crowd was buzzing, their energy at its peak. In the middle of everything, you saw how Jay was now the one sitting behind the drums, and Jake picked up another guitar; the surprise on everyone was evident, but considering the fact that Jake was a guitarist who later fell in love with the drums, all of us knew he was not going to disappoint.

“We love you all,” Heeseung said into the microphone, his silver hair damp with sweat. “Thank you for making tonight unforgettable. This last one’s for you. Make some fucking noise!”

The band launched into their closing song, “Shout Out.” Jake and Sunghoon, back to back, played guitar in unison, and Heeseung jumped into the crowd; this was one of the many highlights of the concert. Confetti cannons exploding were the reason the crowd was being showered in glittering red and gold paper. The moment Heeseung went back to the stage, they did their final bows, some of them collecting presents they were being thrown at and others giving the towels they used to clean their sweat by some of the fan requests.

The house lights came on as the band exited the stage, and the crowd began to disperse. You were still on cloud nine when your phone vibrated in your pocket; you answered the call.

“Hey, Da Bi, what’s up?” you said, and you could sense from the other line that she was at a party.

“Y/N, did you forget that today is Sun Hee’s party at the Avalon Club, right?” You opened your eyes wide, already moving through the crowd to go. “Guys, she forgot! Pay me!”

“I’m so sorry; I’m already on my way; I think it’s near, right? I was at the concert.”

“Oh yeah, how was the concert?” You smiled wide at the mention of the concert that you were positive you won’t forget.

“It was incredible,” you said, your voice still hoarse from screaming along to the songs. “I can’t even explain it—everything was perfect. Sunghoon literally stopped right in front of me during his bass solo.”

Da Bi let out a dramatic gasp. “Shut up! Sunghoon? The bassist who looks like he walked straight out of a fantasy novel? You’re kidding!”

“I’m not,” you replied with a laugh. “I think I’m still in shock. And Jake kept looking at me too. I swear, I’m not imagining it.”

Da Bi’s voice rose in excitement. “Okay, now I really need all the details when you get here. You’d better hurry before we drink all the cocktails without you.”

“I’m on it,” you said, weaving your way through the dispersing crowd. “Save me something fruity, okay? I’ll be there soon.”

Ending the call, you quickly pulled up directions to Avalon Club on your phone. It wasn’t too far—a ten-minute walk at most. You adjusted your bag, made sure your phone still had enough charge, and joined the stream of concertgoers heading toward the main exit.

The cool night air hit you as soon as you stepped outside. The streets were alive with post-concert energy, people chatting excitedly about the show or taking pictures with their newly bought merch. You caught sight of a food truck nearby and briefly considered grabbing a snack but decided against it. Sun Hee’s party wasn’t something you could casually walk into late.

As you hurried down the sidewalk, your phone buzzed again. This time it was a message from Da Bi.

Da Bi: The DJ is killing it tonight. Don’t make me send Sun Hee to drag you here!

You laughed under your breath and picked up the pace. The distant thrum of bass from Avalon Club grew louder with each step, and because your tension was too high, you were ready to make your friend happy.

When you finally reached the club, you could see a line of people waiting to get in, the neon sign glowing bright against the night sky. You spotted Da Bi near the entrance, waving frantically when she saw you.

“You made it!” she said, pulling you into a quick hug. “Come on, let’s get inside before Sun Hee loses her mind.”

“Lead the way,” you said with a grin, already feeling the infectious energy of the music pulling you in. Since it was late, about to be eleven p.m., there were more people than usual.

Now that you really took a look at the place, it was packed; the music was pounding through your chest as you and Da Bi weaved through the throng of bodies on the dance floor, the diverse color lights pulsed to the beat, casting an almost hypnotic glow over the crowd. You could see how you two were spotted almost immediately from the VIP section by the birthday girl, waving wildly at the sight of you and your—hopefully—future girlfriend. She wore a sparkly silver dress that shimmered with the minimum movement she made, a drink in her hand and a contagious smile on her face.

“Finally!” Sun Hee exclaimed as you approached, pulling you into a hug. “You’re lucky we love you, or I would’ve sent someone to drag you here myself.”

“I’m sorry, but I have an amazing excuse. The concert was insane,” you replied, laughing as Da Bi pushed a fruity cocktail into your hand and, with his free one, grabbed Da Bi’s hand.

“Drink first, details later,” Da Bi declared, already swaying to the music.

You took a sip, the sweetness and tang refreshing after the rush to get here; you greeted Da Bi’s friends to not be disrespectful. The music shifted to a more upbeat track, and soon the three of you were lost in the rhythm, dancing without a care in the world. Sun Hee’s party was in full swing, complete with a table laden with drinks and snacks for the group.

There was a moment where Sun Hee was almost grinding between you and Da Bi, already drunk enough to even grab you from your neck. Some of the party invites were doing a circle around us, enjoying the show with their own partners or some random person they met at the club. You looked to your left, and you thought that the alcohol on your head was making you create scenarios in relation to what happened at the concert, but when you saw one of them raising his hand right in your direction, you knew you were not losing your mind.

At the corner of the VIP section, you saw Jake with a girl on his lap kissing his neck, his hooded eyes locked with your body and his hand waving at you. You returned the greeting and saw Sunghoon. He was seated beside Jake, a glass of whiskey in his hand, the amber liquid swirling as he tilted it slightly. His sharp gaze was piercing, trailing over your form with intensity. The shadows that the club lights created accentuated his features—his jawline sharp enough to cut, his lips pressed into a faint smirk, only looking away to some fans that recognized them and wanted a sign.

Your eyes went back to Jake, and when he realized that, his smirk deepened as he leaned back further, the girl on his lap completely unaware of the silent exchange happening between you two. Looking around, you found Heeseung and Jay playing drinking games. He whispered something into Sunghoon's ear, making him giggle, and their eyes never left yours, as if daring you to keep looking.

“Holy shit,” Da Bi whispered, her eyes wide and noticing the guys you were looking at. “Are they…?”

“Yes,” you said, barely able to get the word out, mostly because you don’t want them to have the idea that you’re stalking them.

“Okay, now you’re just living in a fantasy,” Da Bi muttered, shaking her head in disbelief as her grip tightened around Sun Hee’s waist.

You turned back to her, feeling your cheeks heat up. “I swear, I didn’t plan this!”

“Well, if this isn’t fate, I don’t know what is,” Sun Hee said, nudging you, her tipsy self still finding the way to speak. “Now, are we going to give them a show or what? Kiss me since you didn’t bring a present."

You looked at Da Bi, and she nodded, giving you the green light to grab the back of Sun Hee’s neck and put your lips together; the euphoria of the moment even made Da Bi not have a care in the world and roam with her hands over the birthday girl's body while kissing her neck.

The crowd around you was eating it up, and you were almost positive that you didn’t have to glance over to know Jake and Sunghoon were still watching—if you act cocky, it is obvious.

Sun Hee broke the kiss with a mischievous laugh, her eyes gleaming as she turned to Da Bi, pulling her into the moment as well, kissing her with passion. The three of you danced together, hands roaming, bodies swaying in sync with the beat. When you finally dared to look back at the VIP section, Jake’s expression was unreadable, and so was Sunghoon's. The girl on his lap was trying to get Jake’s attention by showing more of her cleavage with her hands caressing his chest, but his focus was solely on you. He tilted his head slightly, as if to say, ‘Keep going.’.

Sunghoon, meanwhile, leaned back in his seat, one hand resting on his thigh while the other one played with the back of his neck. His eyes were sharp, following every move you made; he soon reached out to take another sip of his glass, his lips curling into a subtle smirk when your gaze locked with his.

Da Bi leaned close to your ear, her voice barely audible over the music. “Just in case! There are free rooms upstairs!”

You laugh, already knowing what your friend was trying to say. “You’re out of your mind.”

She grinned, nudging you playfully. “You’ve got their attention. Just in case you want to take them both.”

You rolled your eyes at Da Bi's cheeky comment, though your lips curved into a sly grin at the thought of it. "Both? That's ambitious, even for me."

"Oh, fuck off! Don't act like you don't want it. You're practically making them beg from up here." Sun Hee said, looking at you before giving a quick look to the club. "Look, the girl from Jake's lap set off! Go get them!"

"Sun Hee, they are celebrities, and they are already taking pictures of them! If they see me going with even one of them, it’s most likely that they will get my address in no time. Please forget it." You decided to give your attention to Sun Hee, who was dancing with her friends, and you joined in with the iconic Big Bang song ‘Fantastic Baby.’. From the corner of your eye, you saw how Da Bi disappeared.

You stopped dancing when you saw how drunk Sun Hee was and how she was tripping with nothing but her feet, taking her hand so she could sit down at your separate VIP section. Da Bi started looking for the two of you; you caught her attention by putting your hands up in a waving motion. She quickly came, and you decided to go to the bar, coming back soon after with a bottle of water for Sun Hee.

"Where did you go?" You screamed so she could hear you as you sat down beside Da Bi.

"I went to the person that plays with the lights; they will turn them off and play for like half an hour with the colored lights."

"Are you out of your mind?! Why did you do that?!" Da Bi rolled her eyes as her palm touched your exposed thigh; you could also see how the alcohol was getting to her as she did a small giggle and forgot what she was about to say.

"So you can get down with both of them; when was the last time you had really good sex?" Sun Hee entered the conversation. "And if I’m being honest… I want to fuck Da Bi." You opened your eyes but soon laughed about it.

"You two are insane." You laughed, and just like Da Bi said, the lights turned off to make an entrance to the colored lights, distracting people as more bottles came their way.

"Go grab those sticks and sign that NDA; make us proud!" Da Bi made you stand up and slapped your ass. You walked a few steps before looking back at them; they were already making out, so you had no other choice but to go.

You started to walk to the bar for a shot of vodka to make you even braver to do anything with them; the liquid burned, but at least it did the work to calm your nerves. You exhaled deeply; the calm came to you in contrast to the wild environment you were in. People were coming from left to right to the bar, and soon, a person sat on the free chair next to you.

"You look like you've got something on your mind." His voice was loud enough to make you listen. You knew that voice like the palm of your hand, of course you did. The nerves came back when you saw Jake, leaning casually against the bar and close enough that you could feel the heat radiating off him.

You raised an eyebrow, swirling the vodka in your second glass before drinking it all, the feeling a little more tolerable than before. “It's not very often that a person of your favorite group looks at you too much and comes to talk to you. You know?"

"You grabbed my eyes at the concert. Did you enjoy the show, by the way?" The smoothness of Jake’s voice near your ear when he decided to move closer captivated you. It was not the first time you heard his voice, but having it near you was such a different thing. Because of the closure between the two of you, you could see how his shirt was open just enough to tease the edge of a tattoo on his collarbone, smirking at the memory of him being shirtless in the show.

“You guys were unforgettable. You sang my favorite songs.” Your comment made Jake chuckle, not in a funny manner, but in a proud one.

“Good. I’d hate to think all the effort went unnoticed.” You got brave enough to create a small distance between the two of you, if it was possible, noticing how his gaze dipped and looked at your lips, lingering just long enough to make your cheeks warm.

“Sorry about him; he likes to flirt a lot.” A loud voice appeared, and by the smile on Jake’s face, you could think it was Sunghoon, and sure it was, once your head turned around to the direction of the voice. Your eyes met, and Sunghoon gave a side smile, a very common gesture of his. “I’m Sunghoon.”

“I already know that, but it's really nice to meet you. I’m Y/N.” You grabbed his extended hand when you noticed it, his thumb caressing the top of it before letting it go. “I’m a fan since your MCR YouTube covers.”

Sunghoon’s smile now grew bigger, his characteristic shy smile with his fangs showing up and a genuine smile from Jake. “Wow, it’s been a while since we’ve heard that.”

“We’re lucky then; thank you for sticking around this long.” Jake said, and you grab another shot on your way, drinking it all at once and ordering some for Jake and Sunghoon. The moment they arrive, you point at them.

“Thank you for drinking these shots,” you teased, feeling a sudden surge of confidence. The bartender gave you six shots; the boys looked at each other before drinking three each of them. The DJ changed the music, people practically screaming when the speakers were blasting “Don’t Stop The Music” by Rihanna. You stood up and walked a few steps away before turning to them. “Wanna dance?”

“Who are you asking?” Sunghoon said, pointing at him and later, Jake.

“To both of you.” You tilted your head to look at them both, and Jake stood up from his chair. You went a little deeper into the crowd, and soon you felt a presence behind you. Jake gave you a smirk before grabbing your hips, and Sunghoon found his way in front of you, and your drunk self wrapped your arms behind his neck.

All the people were stuck together, and the sultry rhythm made you feel both of their bodies so close to you that you locked eyes with Sunghoon again, and just like Jake minutes before, his gaze went to your glossy lips and right back to your eyes.

“You don’t have to be shy,” you teased; your voice was just loud enough to be heard over the music.

One of his hands left your waist and directly moved your hair aside to speak directly through your ear. “I don’t think I am. We just don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable or forced to do anything.”

“You both don’t make me feel any of those things. You two make me feel good". You gave a small laugh after the double senses of your last sentence, gaining a small smile from him as he noticed your voice steady and sure despite the alcohol.

“We can make you feel good.” Sunghoon’s hand on your waist traced imaginary figures on your sides; your right hand travelled sensually from his shoulder to the back of his head, softly grabbing some of his hair, a dominant move from your part.

“You have permission to prove it,” the words left your mouth, and his hand threw your hair back completely before giving a small bite on your ear, making you shut your eyes as you sighed. He started to pamper kisses from the back of your ear to your neck, feeling how he suctioned softly a couple of times and gaining soft moans from you, throwing your head back and falling on Jake’s chest in the process when he found a specific spot on your neck.

Jake watched everything, and you could tell how he was enjoying it fully; he saw how you opened your eyes to connect with his eyes, and you grabbed his right hand to put it right on the front of your neck, feeling the coolness of his rings making a contrast with your warm skin.

“Kiss me.” You didn’t have to tell him twice when his lips crashed with yours, and it was everything you expected as the moment was turning more intimate—intense, dirty, and needy. His hand tightened slightly around your neck as the kiss deepened, slightly limiting the oxygen you were breathing while feeling the coolness of your middle lip piercing. Sunghoon didn’t stop either; his hands went slowly to your ass, squishing the flesh of it as he was watching, slowly losing all self-control. All three had lust in their eyes.

The moment Jake left your lips, he made your head turn to Sunghoon, your hand flying to the back of his head again as he kissed you. His kiss was more sensual, he was practically savoring the moment, but when his tongue brushed against your bottom lip in a way to seek permission, it became rougher losing it when he sucked your tongue, and action that you secretly loved, his lips catching the sinful moan you gave to him. Now, you could feel Jake’s plump lips attacking the other side of your neck, and you smiled in the middle of the kiss.

Sunghoon bit your bottom lip, sighing at your state, his left hand stopping on your face to caress your cheek, watching your swollen lips and cleaning some of the saliva from the corner of your lips; you quickly wrapped your lips around his thumb when he touched your bottom lip with a teasing smirk playing on your face. The sudden move made Sunghoon's brows raise, his lips curving into a cocky grin.

“You look like a dream.” Sunghoon said, and Jake hummed in response.

“I look even better naked.” You didn’t want to sound like a ‘pick me,’ but if there was a chance to actually have them both by the end of the night, you wouldn’t waste it.

“Sunghoon, go to the manager so he can rent the room above us.” Since Jake was the oldest, he nodded and went to find him, making his way quietly in the crowd so he couldn't be seen. You and Jake made your way to a nonvisible corner following Sunghoon with the same caution as his friend, who ended up talking to one person that you recognize as the manager.

The club was still dark, green lights flashing every now and then with the beat of electronic music. Jake leaned casually against the wall of the reached corner, diving back to your lips and kissing you slowly, not trying to rush things despite having your approval. His hand was going south, handfully grabbing your ass while yours went to his shirt, undoing one button.

“All done; we can go to the room.” Sunghoon’s voice interrupted the moment, all three going through the hidden stairs to the last room of the hallway between laughs and slight touches. With a key, Sunghoon opened the door, making you enter first, the both of them joining right after.

The door clicked shut behind them, and the low thrum of the club music faded into a distant hum. Your hands were instantly placed on each side of your jacket, removing it and tossing it to an individual couch in the room, not noticing that Sunghoon was also taking his leather jacket off his body to leave it on a table as well as his rings. Jake came closer to you, his hand reaching for yours to put your chests together.

“Are you sure about this?” You could tell he asked for both of them, but you had already planted the idea in your head.

“I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t.” Sunghoon approaches you after a few moments, his hands finding your waist as he draws you in for another kiss, hearing Jake scoffing at the action. You felt how his kiss was slow until it became rough like the one you had on the dance floor. Despite the heat that was radiating from both of you, his hands felt cold when they went to lower the back zipper of your dress, yours going immediately to his belt.

Jake’s presence loomed behind you, his hands brushing along your arms before resting on your hips. “Don’t get greedy, Hoon.” Jake’s breath was hot against your ear, and before going down your neck, you felt the cool air touch your back when Sunghoon successfully zipped down the dress and Jake let the fabric fall to the floor in a soft heap.

Sunghoon went directly to your back, separating Jake slightly, feeling how your bra got loose in a quick motion. You took the end of his white shirt, taking it off him with his help; meeting his unknown belly button piercing, a small gasp left your mouth. Usually, men will only have the traditional piercing, the two dots, but you will never imagine seeing a silver cross-shaped, dangling belly button piercing. Your tongue darted out to wet your lips. When the fuck did he get that?

“Not what you expected?” You denied it, and your hands went to his small waist, fingers lingering on the pretty jewelry.

“But it suits you.” You smiled as you made a 180° turn to face the Aussie boy, clamming his lips in a kiss. His hands softly gripping your breasts and smiling in delight with how you made them know how good they were making you feel, just like they said. You could feel Sunghoon's hand playing with the strings of your thong, snapping the elastic to your skin, making you grow desperate due to his little game.

"Fuck, just take it off," the exasperation was very noticeable by the tone you used, the sound of how SUnghoon spanked your ass resonated in unison with your gasp.

"Easy, baby." Jake guided you to sit on his lap on the edge of the bed, his erection trying to get out of his pants, but you were getting distracted by how Sunghoon kneeled in front of you. "Let me take your shoes off."

He took your heel boots easily and put them away; his hands caressed your legs from your ankles to your thighs, his lips leaving kisses in the process. You threw your head back to Jake's shoulders the moment his veiny hands grabbed once again your tits, his index and thumb playing with your nipples. All the sensations you were experiencing were embarrassingly noticeable on your underwear, sticking into your cunt.

Sunghoon’s hands slid higher up your thighs, not being able to see the mischievous glint in his eyes due to Jake abusing every spot on your neck. He leaned in, pressing his lips to your inner thigh, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin just enough to make you shiver. Sunghoon’s fingers hooked into the sides of your thong, pulling it down slowly, his eyes never leaving your entrance. The fabric slid down your legs, and he tossed it aside, his hands returning to your thighs to spread them gently.

He trailed kisses higher and higher, causing small shivers through your entire body, a reason why Jake's hands moved down your waist to hold you steady the moment you squirmed at the sensation of Sunghoon's tongue against your core; moans falling from your mouth when his fingers went deep in you, stretching you out.

"You're so responsive," Jake said, his left arm hugging your body as the other hand went again to one of your nipples to pinch it, trembling at the combination. "You will hold your orgasm; can you do that for us?"

“Y-yes, I can, just… don’t stop, please.”

“Fuck, you’re such a good girl.” You could only nod since your voice caught in your throat as Sunghoon continued his work, alternating between slow, almost teasing strokes and firm fingering. "Sunghoon, let me."

You whined when Jake stood up and left you with your legs open; he lowered himself to the same level as your wet cunt and eagerly licked a long strip, collecting as much as he could of your arousal to make a stop on your clit. You laid down completely on the bed in a moaning mess, incoherent words coming from you that you couldn’t even understand when Sunghoon's tongue joined, fucking you as deep as he could. Both of your hands went to their heads to create a grip on their hairlocks; Jake hummed to your action, the vibration of it causing that familiar knot to almost snap.

“Please stop, please, please.” You were begging at this point; Sunghoon separated from you with his fingers inside you this time, curling them to touch that sweet spot that you sometimes couldn’t even reach yourself.

"You better give me a good reason," he said, nonstopping his movements and even making them faster. Your moans got higher as you tried to speak, looking for the perfect timing.

"I want to cum on your dicks." Your comment made both guys freeze for a moment, their eyes meeting over your trembling form. Jake let out a low chuckle, and his hand brushed your hair away from your face with his mouth and chin glistening from eating you out. “Please, daddies.”

You truly didn’t know what got into you; the word simply slipped out, tumbling from your lips before your brain could catch up. The room went silent, and a heavy tension hung in the air. Heat rushed to your cheeks as you froze, unsure whether to apologize or fake yourself passing out, but that last one would be too pathetic.

Jake’s hands guided you to sit down, and he walked straight to you. Your hair was formed into a messy ponytail by Jake. To make you look up, you gasped at the sweet feel of the slight pain that caused. “Be a good girl and help Daddy out, then.” Your hands travelled fast to his belt and boxers, hissing the moment he saw your doe eyes looking at his hooded ones with your hand wrapping his dick.

Sunghoon went to one of the drawers, and after some searching, he came to your spot and threw condoms and a half-empty lube.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, Jake." You hand-wrapped around his length, his head being thrown back when you put a certain amount of pressure. You looked back; Sunghoon was almost naked, his black boxers still on, not helping with hiding his erection. "Let me help you so you can join."

With your free hand, you grabbed the elastic and took them down with his help. Sunghoon's dick had slightly more girth than Jake's, but the same length. He stood up next to him, your free hand positioned on Sunghoon’s hip before you left a kitty lick on his tip, being rewarded by Sunghoon’s soft groan.

You started slow movements, your hands sliding up and down their lengths, enjoying the way their breaths hitched and their eyes showed you how much they liked it. Jake’s hips bucked slightly into your touch, making you lean forward to put your lips together around Jake’s tip, swirling your tongue and earning a sharp intake of breath. Sunghoon groaned softly, his hand reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Fuck, you’re taking me so good.” You heard Jake moan, so you went a little bit deeper, his hand not wasting time to put it behind your head, grabbing your hair in a messy ponytail to see how you fully took him. You took him deeper, his tip touching the back of your throat and making yourself gag around him, the vibrations causing his body to shake slightly and hold Sunghoon’s shoulder, who was also losing his mind. You were bobbing your head up and down, and the hand that was on Sunghoon’s length followed the slightly fast pace you were creating.

After a few more minutes of controlling his orgasm, you turned your attention to Sunghoon, taking him into your mouth as you continued to pump Jake. And just like Jake, his hand went directly to do the same messy ponytail.

“G-God, this feels… s-so good.” An idea popped out in your brain as you took him out of your mouth; hearing him whimpering was not something you expected, but it did make you even wetter for both of them. “P-Please, go deeper.”

You let him go out of your mouth as you spat on it for extra lubrication, “You mean like this?” You focused on breathing through your nose, relaxing your throat in the process as you took him deeper; Sunghoon’s hips bucked forward, hitting that little bell that actually made your eyes water.

“Fuck, y-yes, baby. Don’t stop, please.” Time passed, and you saw Sunghoon's polite facade turning off; the back of your head still got his hand behind it, with the difference that he was going deeply and roughly, trying to release himself. He was about to speak out when you once again took him out of your mouth but soon created a small choir of moans and groans when you made his and Jake’s dicks be placed right next to each other as you pathetically tried to suck on their tips, the corners of your mouths hurting.

You were going back and forth, hearing them praising you, only motivating you to suck them off even more; their moans grew louder, and that was your cue to stop. You looked up to meet their eyes. “Someone please sit on the bed.”

Sunghoon was faster as he sat on the bed, taking the condoms and lube to his side. You crawled right on top of him, his tip touching your wet entrance at the action. You initiated a kiss; he was tasting himself through that kiss, feeling that he liked it when his hand went to the back of your neck, tongues touching and creating even more wet sounds.

“Are you going to keep sucking me, baby?” Jake’s voice made its way into the room; you looked around and grabbed the lube in your hand. He was confused at first, but soon opened his eyes when he realized what you intended to do. “Holy fuck, you want to kill me.”

Jake gave a small peck on your lips before going behind you; his hands gripped your hips, making you position yourself on all fours; the coolness of the lube touched your anus. While Jake dedicated himself to spreading and combining the lube with your arousal, Sunghoon took your face to pamper kisses. This time, they were sweet enough to distract you, locking his eyes with yours.

"How can I make you relax better, princess?" you thought about it, smiling softly at him.

"How about a 69?" The moment his lips went to your cunt at first, you could tell how much of a munch guy he was, like it was a life-or-death mission to leave you empty. Sunghoon smiled, both of you getting comfortable at the position.

You got once again his pretty dick in front of you; the red color of the base was evident, the tip shining due to the precum that you wanted to lick. You felt his kisses once again in your inner thighs, his thick fingers pushing into the skin of your ass, spreading it apart for him and Jake.

"I'm going to finger you first. Can you relax for me, baby?" Jake's voice was deeper than before. You took a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart as Jake's voice resonated in your ears.

Sunghoon was utterly absorbed, his lips and tongue working on you like a starving man, his fingers gripping behind your thighs for a moment before going back to your ass, holding you steady as you took him in your mouth.

Jake’s fingers traced teasing circles, spreading the lube evenly while ensuring you adjusted to the sensation. You sat for a moment on Sunghoon's face, and Jake took that opportunity to lean in closer, his breath hot against the back of your neck as he murmured, "Let me know if it's too much, baby. We want you to be comfortable."

You went back to being on all fours, licking Sunghoon's tip again before going all in and sucking him off, his moans vibrating right on your cunt.

"I want you to breathe for me, baby." You did what he said, feeling his fingertip barely pressing against the tight ring of muscle, giving you time to adjust. "You're doing so well, such a good girl." His praise made you wetter, arousal that Sunghoon licked every time.

"F-fuck, princess. Please take me deeper." You heard Sunghoon's whiny voice, so pretty, and you took it as you could, gagging around him and gaining a small spank. "Shit, sorry."

"Please do it again, Hoon." You said it was embarrassing how much you liked it and how you didn’t even think of what you were about to say, like you did this whole night. Your mind was out of it in pleasure. His palm spanked the plush skin of your ass again, more arousal creating on your entrance.

Jake's hand tightened on your hips, his fingers moving in a slow but deep rhythm, coaxing your body to adjust to his touch. You moaned softly around Sunghoon's length, your focus split between Jake's patient teasing and Sunghoon's growing desperation.

Sunghoon let out a deep groan, his mouth taking deep breaths to rest for a moment. “You’re doing so well, princess. Look at you, so pretty with your mouth full of me.” His voice was strained, trembling with need as your tongue worked over him.

His words sent a shiver through you as Jake's fingers finally pushed deeper, carefully allowing you to adjust once again to the sensation. Your body tensed at first, but the combination of Sunghoon’s tongue on your clit and Jake’s soothing words eased you into the moment.

“Relax, baby,” Jake whispered, “You’re taking me so well. Just breathe.”

You moaned around Sunghoon, your body relaxing as you followed Jake’s guidance. Sunghoon’s hand tightened in your ass, his breaths coming faster as he tried to hold back. “F-fuck, Y/N, you’re going to make me lose it.”

Jake chuckled softly behind you, his tone filled with both amusement and desire. “Not yet, Hoon. Let’s make this last.”

Jake added a second finger, stretching you; his other hand trailed up your spine, leaving goosebumps in its wake and feeling how he pushed you down, making you gag around Sunghoon. Sunghoon’s hips bucked slightly against your lips, and you responded by hollowing your cheeks, taking him even deeper.

Jake's fingers began to thrust once he saw you moving your ass towards him, and Sunghoon went back to thrusting your entrance with his tongue. You had to stop sucking Sunghoon to let all the moans and gasps free.

"Fuck, d-daddies." You put your hands on Sunghoon's thighs for support, feeling your legs shaking. "You two are so good for me, shit!"

Jake's pace quickened to drive you to the edge, and Sunghoon was unwilling to let you catch your breath as he groaned against your core as his tongue thrust deeper, his lips teasing every sensitive spot.

“Look at you,” Jake murmured, his voice husky and low as he leaned over you. His lips brushed against your shoulder, sending shivers down your spine. “Such a needy little slut for us. Tell me how much you love it.”

“I—ah—I love it so much, Daddy.” You managed to gasp, your voice shaking with pleasure. “You’re both—fuck—so good.”

Sunghoon chuckled against you as he focused on pulling every last sound out of you. “You taste so good,” he said between licks, his breath warm against your skin. “Don’t hold back. We want to hear from you, baby.”

Your body trembled, your knees threatening to give you out as the sensation was consuming you. Jake’s fingers curled inside you, hitting that perfect spot with each thrust, while Sunghoon’s fingers pounded in and suctioned on your clit. You cried out, your head falling back as your pleasure built to an unbearable peak.

“Daddy, I’m so close,” you whimpered, your fingers digging into Sunghoon’s thighs as your legs quivered.

Jake’s fingers withdrew suddenly, leaving you empty and aching. Sunghoon stopped his movements, mesmerized by how your pussy was clenching around nothing, eager to have someone inside you. Sunghoon separated you from his body; to sit properly with his back touching the bed headboard, he reached for a condom, ripping the packaging off and sliding the condom through his dick, twitching due to the sensitivity.

You crawled to him, lips kissing as you tasted yourself; your hand reached to his throat and applied pressure on it, an action that made him groan. You separate from him as you look at him.

“You also like that, huh?” Your teasing came flat as his hand went to your throat while his free one went directly to your pussy; you jumped as he inserted two fingers inside you.

“Don’t test me.” He lost his grip and kissed you back, no stopping his movements. You got on your knees on top of him when he stopped; he aligned himself in your entrance, and you slowly got lower, not holding the loud moan at feeling of finally being filled. In the meantime, Jake also put on a condom and went behind you, aligning himself as he also went inside you slowly; both of your holes were filled, and it was like all three were touching heaven in every way.

A few moments later, it was you who started to move as you could before they started thrusting into you; by their gasp of air and incoherent words that would leave from their throats, it was clear that they were enjoying it as much as you were as they moved in perfect unison, somehow synchronizing with the rhythm of your trembling form.

You were so wet that it was easy for both of them to go faster than before, touching spots that you never thought you had, their trust growing more confident, each one coaxing gasps and cries from your lips that only encouraged them further.

“Look at me, pretty,” Sunghoon's voice entered your ears, your blurry vision focusing on him as much as you could; his mullet was messy, swollen lips from the kissing and biting his lower lip, and eyes hooded from all the ecstasy he was feeling, “A pretty doll losing her mind for our cocks, right?”

“Y-yes! You fuck me so good.” you said, motivating the two of them as they went even faster, if that could be possible. “Daddy! I’m going to cum.”

Your walls unconsciously clenched around Sunghoon the moment Jake went deeper, stimulating even more the coil that they were creating. Sunghoon was now the first to stop; it took you back a little, but even more how he turned you around. You were now facing Jake’s fucked-out expression; Jake shared almost the same expression as Sunghoon, with the difference of his glossy eyes, the pleasure even being too much for him.

You felt how Sunghoon’s dick made its way to your wet ring muscle, occupying Jake’s spot. Jake could see how your eyes rolled and your mouth opened to let out the prettiest whines and moans, his mind already making scenarios of that same expression as he entered inside you.

He pumped his painfully hard dick before pushing himself inside you with ease; the double penetration was fast from the beginning. Your hands were extended behind you for support, and Sunghoon’s hands held you steady as Jake’s fast movements created friction for all of them; the bed was moving because of the mingling with the symphony of breathless moans and whispered praises.

“I—I need to cum! Please, daddies, let me cum.” You started to beg, an action that made Jake smile with cockiness.

“Let go, baby. You deserve it.” Sunghoon whispered in your ear, one of his hands going directly to your clit. “Let me help you.”

His fingers moved as fast on your bundle of nerves, and the coil inside you unraveled, your body trembling as waves of pleasure crashed over you. Your cries filled the room, your squirt making a mess in all of you three.

“Let’s leave her empty, Jake.” And they sure did that until the last drop of squirt left your body, both of them guiding you through the overwhelming sensation. Sunghoon followed soon after, his lips on your hips tightening as he reached his peak, a deep groan escaping his lips. Jake was the last to fall, his head resting on the curve that connected your neck and shoulder, his breath hot against your skin.

You felt even more empty when they let go of you, their condoms full of their semen as they threw them in the trash after they did a knot in them. The three of you collapsed onto the bed in a tangled heap, the aftermath of what happened leaving you breathless and content. You passed your hands to your face, knowing that your mascara definitely was ruined and you looked a mess.

Sunghoon’s arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you close as Jake’s fingers traced lazy patterns along your back, basking in the after in the quiet room.

“This is probably the best sex I’ve ever had in my life.” Jake said, making you and Sunghoon laugh.

“Glad I could make that happen,” you said, taking your hand to his cheek and leaving a small peck on his lips.

“And this is our first time having sex with a fan, or having a threesome in general.” Sunghoon’s comment shocked you, feeling a surge of pride due to his comment. You smiled shyly.

“I’m also glad to be your two firsts on that.”

Jake chuckled, pulling you closer into the warmth of his chest. “Well, you’ve definitely set the bar pretty damn high. I don’t think anyone could top this.”

Sunghoon smirked, propping himself up on one elbow as his fingers traced absentminded circles along your arm. “We should’ve done this sooner. But…” He hesitated for a moment, exchanging a glance with Jake. “There’s one small thing we need to take care of.”

“Signing an NDA?” you said with a smile, resting importance on it. “I can give your manager my number so he can deliver the paper. Or do you do that online?”

Sunghoon laughed softly at your comment, shaking his head. “Not exactly the romantic pillow talk I had in mind, but yeah, we need you to sign an NDA. It’s not personal, just… well, you know how things can get.”

Jake leaned in, his lips brushing against your temple. “We trust you, but this is more for everyone’s peace of mind. You understand, right?”

“Of course,” you replied, your tone reassuring. “I get it completely. I’d probably do the same if I were in your position.” You reached over to the bedside table for your phone, all of your phones were there thanks to Sunghoon, who stood up and grab all of them three. “So, how does this work? Should I text my info to your manager?”

Sunghoon tilted his head, clearly impressed by your level-headed response. “We’ll handle it. Our team can send it to you digitally, or if you’re comfortable, we can go over it together before you leave.”

Jake gave a lopsided grin. “Thank you for taking it well. Most people would freak out or make it awkward.”

“I don’t plan on ruining the best night of my life by overthinking,” you said, smirking. “Plus, I kind of expected this. It’s not like I can go around bragging about having a threesome with my favorite artist.”

They both laughed, and the tension in the air eased. Sunghoon leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Thanks for understanding. We’ll make it quick and painless.”

Jake grabbed his phone too, scrolling through it for a moment. “I’ll shoot a message to our manager and let him know. They’ll probably have it ready in a few minutes.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the surreal nature of the situation. Here you were, tangled in the sheets with two idols, discussing legal documents. “This has to be the strangest post-sex conversation I’ve ever had.”

“Well, it’s a first for us too,” Sunghoon admitted, his eyes sparkling with amusement. “But I think it’s safe to say this was worth it.”

Jake nodded in agreement, setting his phone down as he pulled you both closer. “Definitely worth it. And who knows? Maybe we’ll need to renegotiate the terms if we ever want to do this again.”

─── DON'T MIND ME, I <3 ROCKSTARS! I really got into it, hope this is a good enough blog to come back to enhablr, sorry if it's too long, got carried away as you saw. any grammar mistakes will be solved later!

𓄴 𝐓aglist (mostly moots!): @hheeluv @awqken @taeghi @caratstick @021894s @hees-love @heechwe @yangkkomi @dollyyun @wwooyology @ja3yun @v1rtu4ld0ll @firstclassjaylee

[feminismisstillahatemovement]

U.S. — In yet another step toward the advancement of protections for all people groups, activists announced today that MS-13 had officially been added to the LGBTQ+ acronym to ensure that the rights of violent foreign gang members were recognized.

Civil rights groups hailed the announcement as a significant step forward in the ongoing crusade to see MS-13 gang members be given their rightful place in society among other persecuted groups after decades of mistreatment and ostracism.

"MS-13 gang members are some of the most oppressed and vulnerable in our society," said LGBTQMS-13 activist Cherise Hargrave. "For far too long, we have been forced to watch brave MS-13 gang members get shunned and shamed, with people demanding that they hide who they truly are. No more! It's time for MS-13 members to be celebrated for their valuable and important contributions to our world."

Members of the dangerous gang welcomed the news. "It's about time," said Enrique Marquez, who has eight murders on his resume. "I have lived every day of the last 10 years in fear of being arrested, deported, and held accountable for the vicious acts I commit on a regular basis. Now, I can be a proud member of the LGBTQMS-13 community."

Sources said production had begun on a new flag that would add MS-13 symbols and a black teardrop tattoo emblem to the LGBTQ banner, and that Los Angeles would host the first MS-13 Pride Parade later this year.

At publishing time, the Los Angeles Dodgers had announced that Sunday, May 18, would be "MS-13 Day" at Dodger Stadium to celebrate and honor all brave cartel members.

[gwhiz-138]

Black Parade Mask 

* Handmade Papier Mache Mask sourced from Mexico by Colleen Atwood and worn in the filming of My Chemical Romance’s “Welcome to the Black Parade” music video

Gerard Quote: “I got to keep some of the masks used in Sam Bayer’s music video for ‘Welcome To The Black Parade’, which was awesome. One of the things Sam was able to do was introduce me to Colleen Atwood, one of the most celebrated costume designers in Hollywood, after I expressed a great interest in working with her on the band’s Black Parade uniforms, which I had been making doodles of for a couple months. The first thing to know about Colleen is that she’s not only insanely talented, she is one of the kindest, sweetest human beings I have met in my life, and I am very grateful we became friends through working together. I also learned a ton from her, and after the shoot and the working experience, I desperately wanted to become an apprentice of hers– just to hang out and make stuff and keep learning. A little background on Colleen is that she has been working on films for many years. She has received several Academy Awards for costume design, and she is the woman responsible for dressing the characters in everything from Memoirs of A Geisha to Edward Scissorhands, creating his iconic look for the film, along with the rest of the cast and many others. Colleen had discovered a group of mask-makers in Mexico that she loved, of which she asked to make her hundreds of masks for the shoot. I remember her explaining all the reasons she was drawn to their work, what she thought was special about them in their simplicity. I thought they were great, and it was truly a sight to see the scores of extras wearing them during the shoot, making up the bulk of the ‘black parade’. Over the years I have given one or two of these away, and I brought the remaining masks to the video shoot, ‘A Summoning’ as props or set-dressing easter-eggs. The Summoning video was used to accompany the announcement for MCR’s 2020 Reunion Tour, which would have been a very different experience had it occurred. After this finds a new home, I believe I will have three left.” - G (x)

[pdriesta]

CHAPTER ONE

“tripping, falling with no safety net”

pairings —balde x black!barçafemeni player

summary — solana munõz, barça’s newest midfield star, seems fearless on the pitch but struggles with anxiety and homesickness off it. after a rocky first meeting, alejandro balde becomes an unexpected source of support, determined to help her navigate a new city and career. as their bond deepens, late-night talks and shared vulnerabilities blur the lines of friendship, but one thing remains certain—alejandro is determined to make barçelona home for her.

word count — 10.5k

an — NOW NOW NOW. not too much on my wc. i am trying out longer chapters instead of breaking them up into more chapters. let me know your thoughts

masterlist

don’t meet your idols, or anyone you’re a fan of—they’ll just break your phone and tell you that you don’t belong.

the words spun around solana’s mind, stinging each time they echoed. she’d grown up idolizing players like balde, believing they represented something strong and unshakable, that they’d be welcoming to anyone who dared to dream of standing beside them. now, she felt foolish, her childhood wonder clouded by his harsh words and dismissive stare. maybe he was right; maybe she didn’t belong.

her first week in barcelona blurred by, a flurry of training drills, introductory meetings, and her daily battles to keep her chronic anxiety in check. her new teammates were polite, but most of them looked at her like she was a novelty, a stranger who’d stumbled into their world. they were seasoned players, confident in a way that made her feel small. back home, she’d been loved and celebrated—her hometown had practically thrown a parade when she got called up to the USWNT. here, she felt like she was being observed, assessed, and it made her nerves buzz constantly, tightening like a vise around her chest.

as part of the club’s standard procedure, she’d been scheduled to meet with the team psychologist, dr. lucia hernandez, a warm, middle-aged woman with kind eyes that seemed to see right through her. they sat in a cozy office at the training, the walls lined with framed inspirational quotes and photos of famous athletes. it was supposed to feel welcoming, but solana’’s stomach twisted as she perched on the edge of the couch, feeling too exposed.

“so, solana, how’s it all been so far?” dr. hernandez asked, her voice gentle, as if she already sensed the weight solana was carrying.

“it’s… been a lot,” solana admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. she hesitated, glancing down at her hands. “i thought i’d be able to adjust faster, but…” she trailed off, a lump forming in her throat as she tried to gather her thoughts.

“take your time,” dr. hernandez prompted softly.

solana sighed, running a hand through her hair. “i keep wondering if i made the right choice coming here,” she confessed. “everyone at home was so proud, like i’d made it. i thought it would feel… different. like a dream. but now, i just feel out of place. and i miss home so much that it hurts.”

she hesitated, the rawness of her confession making her feel vulnerable. “back home, i had my routines, my support system. people looked up to me, you know? and here… no one knows me. i’m just the new girl from america who can’t seem to keep up with everyone else.”

dr. hernandez nodded, her expression thoughtful. “it’s completely natural to feel this way. you’ve left behind everything familiar and jumped into a world that’s vastly different from what you know. anyone would feel lost.”

solana clenched her fists, feeling the anxiety bubbling up again. “it’s more than just being lost. it’s like… like i’m trying to breathe underwater. my anxiety makes it hard to do basic things without overthinking them a hundred times. every time i make a mistake in training, i feel like i’m confirming to everyone that i don’t belong.”

dr. hernandez studied her, her gaze compassionate. “moving across the world, away from your home, is already a huge adjustment. when you add the pressure of being in a high-profile team, plus your anxiety… it’s no wonder you’re feeling overwhelmed. have you tried reaching out to anyone on the team?”

solana looked away, chewing on her lip. “they’re nice, don’t get me wrong. but they’ve all known each other for years, and i can tell they see me as an outsider. they’re polite, but it’s like they’re waiting to see if i’ll stick around long enough to be worth their time.” she let out a humorless laugh. “at my last club, i felt like i was part of a family. here, i feel like… i don’t know, an alien.”

“that’s a common feeling in situations like this,” dr. hernandez assured her. “but remember, you don’t have to become best friends with everyone immediately. give yourself time. building relationships takes patience, and the right ones will come.”

solana nodded, but deep down, she wondered if she’d ever find her footing here. every morning when she woke up, she’d lie in bed and count the hours until she could call her family, hear the comforting voices that reminded her of home.

training each day was a struggle; every time she stepped onto the field, her mind raced with worries. she could sense her teammates’ eyes on her, measuring, judging, even if they weren’t. her anxiety whispered that every misplaced pass, every minor slip-up, was proof she was out of her depth. it was exhausting, the constant tightness in her chest, the feeling that everyone could see right through her, that they’d soon realize she didn’t deserve to be here.

even in moments when she tried to lose herself in the game, her thoughts would drift back to southern california. the open fields, the cool, quiet nights, her friends who’d gather after games to celebrate at the local diner. she could almost hear their voices cheering for her, their laughter echoing as they’d talk about the future, as if their lives were already written in the stars. barcelona wasn’t part of those plans—it was something she’d dreamed of, not something she’d imagined she’d actually have to face.

and then there was alejandro, his face burned into her memory, reminding her that this world she’d idolized was far harsher than she’d expected. he was supposed to be a hero, someone who represented all the things she loved about the game. instead, he’d treated her like an inconvenience, a stranger who had no place in his orbit.

“i don’t know,” she whispered, almost to herself. “sometimes i think… maybe i should go back home. maybe i’m not cut out for this.”

dr. hernandez leaned forward, her gaze steady. “solana, it’s okay to feel scared, to feel homesick. you’ve made a huge step, and sometimes bravery doesn’t feel like bravery. sometimes it just feels like trying to make it through one more day.”

solana blinked, absorbing the words, letting them settle over her like a fragile comfort. she didn’t feel brave—she felt terrified, more than she ever had in her life. but maybe there was a small victory in the fact that she was still here, still trying.

as she left the office, her heart felt a fraction lighter, though the weight of her homesickness and anxiety lingered, heavy and persistent.

alejandro grunted as he pushed through another rep, the bar trembling in his grip. the burn in his muscles was familiar, grounding—but it couldn’t distract him from the weight in his chest. it wasn’t the lift that made him feel heavy. it was the memory of her.

solana. the girl from the hallway.

her face haunted him—wide eyes brimming with unshed tears, her shoulders drawn in like she was trying to disappear. he hadn’t meant to snap at her. it wasn’t about her, not really. but she’d caught him on a bad day, and she didn’t deserve to carry the sharp edge of his mood.

since then, he’d caught himself looking for her. not obviously, but enough. in the corridors where the women’s team passed by, in the shared stretches on the training pitch. some of the girls gave him nods. others, sharper glances. but not her. she was always just… gone. like a ghost he’d conjured out of guilt.

today was no different. between sets, he scanned the hallway again. players walked in groups, laughing softly, sneakers squeaking on the polished floor. he spotted a few familiar faces—salma, vicky. nods exchanged, moments passed. still no sign of her.

then, out of the corner of his eye, someone appeared. not her. worse.

rosalie.

her presence cut through his focus like a knife. she walked toward him with that smug little smile—one he used to find charming. now it just made his jaw tighten.

their history wasn’t messy so much as it was drawn out—familiar in a way that had once been easy. they’d known each other for years, fallen into something casual when proximity blurred the lines. it worked for a while. no expectations. no strings. until she started asking questions. where he was going. who he was with. posting photos of him on socials—just the back of his head, but still recognizable to those who knew.

he should’ve shut it down then. he thought he had. until now.

“alejandro,” she cooed, drawing out his name like it tasted sweet on her tongue. her fingers brushed his arm, light and deliberate. “long time no see. haven’t noticed you around the women’s side lately.”

he shifted away from her touch, forcing a half-smile. “been busy.”

she didn’t move. didn’t get the hint. instead, she stepped closer, flicking her hair over her shoulder in that deliberate way that used to work on him. once.

but not anymore.

rosalie had always been… convenient. accessible in the way a closed door might still be pushed open. but now, there was nothing behind it. no curiosity. no pull.

“we should catch up,” she said with a slow smile. “grab coffee or something.”

he didn’t flinch, didn’t waver. “i’m good, rosalie.”

the words were firm, final. but she didn’t budge. not right away.

then, just as he was about to move past her, he saw her.

standing just beyond the far doorway, training bag slung over one shoulder, curls haloing her face. she looked caught in a thought, brows slightly furrowed, mouth pressed in a soft line. she wore the full training kit—the blaugrana clinging to her form, highlighting strong legs and quiet grace. there was something about the way she moved. cautious. like she wasn’t sure she belonged here.

his chest clenched at the memory.

“you know her?” rosalie’s voice snapped him back, acidic and sharp.

“nah,” he muttered. “don’t know her yet.”

and it was true. he didn’t know as much as he liked. but he knew what he’d done. and he knew he hadn’t stopped thinking about it since.

she looked up, right at him.

for a heartbeat, their eyes met. and then—gone. she dipped her head and turned into the locker room without a word.

he didn’t even get the chance.

“she’s new, right?” rosalie pressed, stepping closer, as if reclaiming space that wasn’t hers to begin with.

he let out a soft breath, tearing his gaze away from the now-empty doorway. none of this was rosalie’s business, but he could already feel her trying to spin a narrative in her head. she always had a way of making things about her.

“you seem… distracted,” she said, tone syrupy sweet, eyes watching him too closely.

he shrugged. “long day.”

she didn’t buy it. “you’re sure that’s all it is?” her glance flicked back toward the locker room, and the shift in her voice was subtle, but there. jealousy.

alejandro scoffed lightly, forcing a smirk. “didn’t realize there was anything worth noticing.”

he hoped it sounded indifferent. but even as he said it, he hated how hollow it felt.

rosalie wasn’t done. she stepped in front of him, blocking his view, voice dropping to a whisper.

“maybe you just forgot what you’re missing.”

he met her eyes then, flat and unreadable. “there’s nothing i’m missing, rosalie. we were… nothing serious. you know that.”

she flinched, just barely, and masked it with a tight smile. “sure. just don’t go getting attached to the new ones. they’re not worth it.”

he didn’t respond. didn’t give her the satisfaction. he stepped around her, not looking back.

the truth was, he wasn’t attached.

but he was haunted.

haunted by the look in that girl’s eyes. by the way she’d vanished before he could make it right. he didn’t know her name. didn’t know her story. but he knew he owed her something.

even if it was just an apology.

as he returned to the weights, he braced himself. not just for the next set, but for the moment he’d finally cross paths with her again—and for the words that might never be enough.

the top floor of the ciutat esportiva had quickly become solana’s refuge. she’d discovered the tucked-away corner on her first day, after wandering off during her lunch break, hoping to escape the overwhelming buzz of her new team. now, she settled into her favorite spot by a tall, slim window, where the sunlight pooled just right, making it feel far cozier than any training center had the right to be. here, she felt the comfort of solitude, the way the quiet could settle her racing mind and give her space to breathe.

she’d pulled out her battered copy of little women, a book she’d read so many times the cover was worn and creased, the pages slightly dog-eared. it was her comfort read, a tether to home, to her younger self who used to disappear into these pages to drown out the chaos in her mind. reading here, with no one around to judge or interrupt, felt like the only familiar thing she had.

her parents had known about her anxiety since she was young, the first signs showing up in little ways—small fears, persistent worries. when they took her to a specialist, they received the diagnosis: generalized anxiety disorder, coupled with severe social anxiety. the label made her feel strange, different, like there was something intrinsically wrong with her. her parents, desperate to help, put her into football, hoping that being part of a team, with other girls around her, might give her a sense of community, of belonging. and for a while, it worked. she found friends, her world expanding with each new team, each new place.

but the anxiety never really left. it lingered beneath the surface, bubbling up when she least expected it, making even the simplest interactions feel like insurmountable tasks. friends drifted in and out of her life, never staying long enough to truly know her. relationships were a step too far; just the idea of opening herself up like that was enough to make her retreat. football had become her shield, a way to interact without truly exposing herself, a place where the structure and rhythm made it easier to cope.

now, here she was—miles away from home, in a new country, surrounded by strangers who already had their bonds, their inside jokes. she felt the gnawing loneliness more intensely than ever, the weight of isolation pressing down on her like an anchor. she’d traded her old team for a place where she didn’t feel she belonged, and no amount of familiar pages in little women could shake that fear.

her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps, too heavy to belong to any of her teammates. she tensed instinctively, shrinking into herself, her heart rate spiking. she looked up, and her stomach twisted uncomfortably when she saw who it was.

alejandro balde stood a few feet away, looking at her with something she couldn’t quite place. it wasn’t the same cool, dismissive expression he’d worn when they’d first met. this was… softer, almost hesitant. but the memory of his harsh words, the way he’d looked at her like she was just another annoying fan, flashed in her mind. her fingers tightened around the edge of her book, and she felt herself pull back, just the sight of him making her feel unsettled, vulnerable.

“hey,” he said, his voice quiet, as if he were afraid of scaring her off.

she didn’t respond, her gaze dropping to her lap, hoping he’d just leave if she didn’t engage. her anxiety was already flaring, making her feel small and exposed.

he cleared his throat, shifting his weight awkwardly. “look… i wanted to apologize for the other day. i was out of line, and… i shouldn’t have snapped at you like that.”

she finally glanced up, her eyes meeting his for the briefest second before looking away again. she didn’t know what to say, the apology catching her off guard. she’d spent so long convinced he was as harsh as he seemed that hearing this side of him felt strange, almost disorienting.

alejandro took a step closer, then paused, gauging her reaction. he seemed to sense her discomfort and stopped, settling a few feet away on a bench nearby. “i… don’t usually do this, to be honest,” he admitted, a faint laugh escaping him. “apologizing, i mean. but… you just looked so upset, and i realized i was being a total… well, i was being an asshole.”

she swallowed, forcing herself to take a breath, to ease the tension in her shoulders. her fingers traced the cover of her book as a way to ground herself, but her mind was still racing, still reeling from his sudden appearance. he wasn’t some distant idol or childhood obsession—he was her age, really—but that didn’t stop her from feeling a kind of quiet admiration for him. he’d already solidified his place in the team, in the world, while she was still fumbling in the dark, trying to find her footing. it wasn’t about fanfare. it was about presence. he had it. she didn’t.

and now he was sitting there, not towering or aloof like he’d been the first time, but oddly unsure, like he wasn’t quite used to being the one making amends. her heart beat a little faster—not from excitement, but from that familiar, crawling unease that came whenever she felt attention pressing down on her. every part of her screamed to retreat, to throw up her defenses, to not let him in. not even a little.

she nodded once, tightly. “okay,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper, more like a reflex than a decision. she didn’t even know if she meant it.

“okay” he echoed, but he came out more like a question. his eyes flicked toward her, trying to read her, but she didn’t give him much to work with. she kept her expression blank, neutral. it was easier that way. safer.

inside, though, everything was too loud. her brain scrambled through every possible interpretation of the moment—why he was here, what he wanted, whether this was a setup or a test or just another fleeting interaction that would mean more to her than it ever would to him. anxiety had a cruel way of making her second-guess even kindness. nothing ever felt simple. nothing ever was simple.

“i saw your introductory interview,” he added after a beat. "some of us watched it together."

her eyes shot up to his for a second before dropping again. oh. so he had known who she was all along. a weird twist of something uncomfortable knowing she was being perceived by the infamous members of the senior team settled in her chest—not quite betrayal, not quite embarrassment. just the sharp sting of being seen only when convenient. it made her feel exposed, like her guard hadn’t been enough after all.

“uh- thank you,” she said, and again, it came out quiet, almost rehearsed. like she was trying to play a version of herself that knew how to navigate this without crumbling.

but she didn’t. not really.

she hated how easily her thoughts spiraled. how one unexpected interaction could unravel the entire day. already, her stomach was turning, a slow churn of nerves and overanalysis. she wondered if she’d looked weird sitting here, if her posture was off, if she’d sounded cold or dismissive or just plain rude. maybe he regretted coming over now. maybe he thought she was too strange. too uptight. too—

“i just… wanted to say that,” he said, cutting into her spiral like a thread tugging at a fraying edge. “you didn’t deserve how i acted before.”

but her hands were trembling. and she hated that they were.

she didn’t know what to make of him. or this moment. or the uneasy stir in her chest that lingered long after he disappeared from view.

so she did the only thing she knew how to do—buried her nose back in the pages of little women and pretended none of it had shaken her.

even if, deep down, it had.

she didn’t expect him to linger. but he did.

instead of walking away like he said he would, he hesitated, rocking back on his heels, rubbing the back of his neck like he was trying to summon the right words out of thin air.

“i’m alejandro, by the way,” he said after a pause, voice soft. “most people just call me balde.”

like she didn’t already know that. like his name wasn’t stitched into the back of one of the most iconic kits in the world. still, something about the way he said it—genuine, maybe even a little sheepish—made her glance up again. his expression was open. unsure. like he wasn’t sure if she’d care.

“solana,” she murmured.

“solana,” he repeated, like he was trying it on for size, like he wanted to remember. “pretty name.”

she blinked, unsure what to do with that. compliments were dangerous—they triggered all her inner alarms, set off every worst-case scenario her brain could conjure. was he just being polite? did he mean it? was this pity?

he cleared his throat again, trying to bridge the space between them with something light. “so… you like little women, huh? the book, i mean. not like—uh. not like literally—just, the book.”

she stared at him, confused for a second, and then ducked her head, the faintest smile twitching at the corner of her lips before disappearing. she didn’t answer, though. too nervous. too unsure.

“right,” he said, scratching his jaw. “that was dumb. ignore that.”

he looked around, trying to find something, anything, to hold onto. that’s when his gaze dropped to her phone, sitting on the bench beside her. the screen was cracked nearly from edge to edge, a web of fractures slicing through the faint glow of unread notifications.

he winced. “shit. is that from… when i—?”

she didn’t say anything, but her fingers twitched, moving to shield it instinctively, like she was embarrassed.

“fuck,” he whispered under his breath. “look, let me pay for that. seriously.”

her head snapped up, alarmed. “no, it’s fine. i—i dropped it before. it wasn’t you.”

he didn’t believe her. it was obvious. she could tell by the way his mouth pressed into a thin line, guilt tugging at the edges of his face like a shadow. but she couldn’t take his money. she couldn’t owe him anything. she hated the idea of it, hated what it might imply or suggest.

“please,” she said, quieter this time. “it’s fine.”

he looked like he wanted to argue. like he wanted to say something else, fix something, anything. but she was already pulling her arms around herself again, the silent signal that she was retreating. shutting down. not because she didn’t want to talk, but because she didn’t know how to, not in the way people expected.

he nodded slowly. once. “okay. but if you change your mind…”

he hesitated, shifting on his feet, his gaze lingering on her for a second longer. then, with a sigh that barely reached his lips, he added quietly, “i’ll leave you alone now.”

it wasn’t bitter or cold—just honest. almost reluctant. like he didn’t want to leave, but he could tell she needed him to. he gave her one last glance—hesitant, almost apologetic—and then turned to go, his steps slower this time, like his feet didn’t really want to carry him away.

he didn’t finish the sentence. didn’t really need to. he gave her one last glance—hesitant, almost apologetic—and then turned to leave, his steps slower this time, like his feet didn’t really want to carry him away.

and solana watched him go, heart hammering in her chest for reasons she didn’t want to name. she felt exposed, like he’d walked into her bubble and seen too much—even if she’d barely said a thing. it was always like this. one awkward conversation and her mind would dissect it for hours. replay every word. analyze every silence.

and alejandro? he walked out of that quiet corner of the ciutat esportiva feeling like he’d just kicked an innocent puppy. guilt gnawed at him, low and constant. he didn’t know why he cared so much—maybe it was the way her voice had trembled, or how she kept folding into herself like she wanted to disappear. maybe it was the cracked screen. or maybe it was just… her. soft-spoken, unreadable, a little closed-off in a way that made him want to try again.

next time, maybe he’d bring something to fix. even if it was just the silence.

alejandro tried to leave her alone.

he told himself that was the right thing to do. she hadn’t exactly welcomed the conversation—barely spoke, barely looked at him. just held her broken phone like a fragile secret, muttering that it was fine, even when he offered to cover the repair. he left the locker room feeling like he’d kicked an innocent pup. awkward. out of place. clumsy in the way only guilt can make you feel.

he promised himself he’d let it go.

but that night, he couldn’t stop thinking.

it started small. a flicker of memory—her face, the way her braids framed her expression when she looked up at him, startled and unreadable. then the curiosity grew. her name floated back to him in the dark like an itch he couldn’t scratch. solana muñoz. washington spirit. midfielder. called up at fourteen.

he reached for his phone like it was instinct.

there wasn’t much in terms of flashy content. no headlines screaming her name, no viral montages or loud declarations. what he found instead were match summaries. quiet praise. short clips buried in corners of old game footage. the kind of player you had to really look to see.

and when he watched her, he understood.

she wasn’t playing to be seen. she was playing to understand. her style was subtle—sharp passes made not for show but for necessity. the way she moved off the ball, eyes always shifting, head turning, checking her shoulder before the space even opened. there was a calmness to her game that stood out. she was precise. unbothered by chaos. the kind of player who didn’t need to dribble past five people to prove she was thinking two steps ahead.

he respected that.

as a defender, his job was to read. to intercept. to anticipate what others missed. and somehow, she already seemed to be on the other side of that anticipation—already moved, already passed, already gone. she didn’t play like a kid. she played like someone who knew things others hadn’t even begun to ask.

by the time he put his phone down, it was nearly 3 a.m.

the ache behind his eyes set in as he laid back on the pillow, one arm flung over his forehead. the guilt twisted low in his chest. not because he had embarrassed her—but because he had dismissed her. like she was just another player. another new face in the training grounds. and she wasn’t.

morning hit hard.

he woke up groggy, disoriented, muscles tight with fatigue. everything felt like it was happening half a second too fast—pulling on his training jacket, drinking lukewarm coffee, slipping into the back seat of the car that would take them to the stadium. his eyes burned. but he didn’t complain.

he went through the motions. laced his boots. stretched on autopilot. nodded when the coaches spoke, gave half-smiles when teammates cracked jokes. ferran was louder than usual. someone had music playing off a phone. and still, alejandro couldn’t shake the image of her—sharp-eyed, quiet, moving through space like she already knew where danger lived.

by the time the bus pulled up to camp nou, his stomach had settled. the nerves were still there, of course—they always were—but something about being back here steadied him. this place didn’t ask questions. it only expected answers. and alejandro liked giving them.

the routine grounded him—training tops, pep talks, playlists echoing through the bus—but the fog didn’t really lift until he stepped into the tunnel.

then he heard it.

the crowd. his crowd. the vibration in his chest. the swell of voices, rising like a wave, crashing over the turf.

when he emerged onto the pitch at camp nou, everything clicked back into place.

the hum of adrenaline in his veins. the stretch of green beneath his boots. the chants, the drums, the flags. this was his element. his calm.

he took a deep breath, let it steady him.

and even then—even when the world narrowed into ninety minutes and white lines—he still thought about her. the quiet girl from washington. the one who never raised her voice but played like a surgeon. the one with a cracked phone and a soft “it’s fine” and a mind that, maybe, worked like his.

he didn’t know what he wanted from her. maybe nothing. maybe just to say something better than what he’d managed before. but he knew one thing for sure.

“whatever happens,” he though to himself as he jogged toward the touchline, “i’m gonna make it right.”

and then the whistle blew. and he let the game carry him.

solana had been here for weeks, but still, the feeling hadn’t changed. the feeling of being around the group, but never truly in it. she was there, on the pitch, sweat beading on her forehead, her feet moving almost mechanically as the drills ran on around her. but her mind? it felt miles away. she was part of the routine, yes, but not a part of the dynamic.

when the coach split them into pairs, solana fell into the pattern she’d learned long ago—lingering at the edges, looking for a place to fit, but never quite finding one. when she was younger, it was different. it wasn’t just the team; it was school, too. the pang of being the last picked for any group activity. the whispered laughter, the feeling of being overlooked. it was an ache that had followed her through childhood, carried into her teenage years, and somehow, even here. with people who knew how to smile in her direction and nod, but never really see her.

she couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt like part of something. not really. her role, the quiet observer, was something she’d gotten good at. when people were busy laughing or planning something, she’d stand a little further back, watching, trying to figure out what they saw that she couldn’t grasp.

it was easier that way. less painful.

she exhaled slowly, a strand of her braid falling loose and brushing against her cheek. practice was moving faster than she anticipated. the team split into their smaller groups, pairs, trios. and once again, solana was left to her own thoughts. no one actively ignored her, but she didn’t need to be invisible to feel it. she was. a face in the crowd, like always.

just when the silence in her mind began to stretch too long, a voice broke through.

“hey, solana! you okay?”

she blinked, startled. turning to see rosalie standing just a few feet away, a wide smile on her face. the usual cheerfulness was in her eyes, the same easy confidence that seemed to radiate from her. she wasn’t asking in the way people sometimes do when they feel obligated to check on someone—no, rosalie was genuine. she wanted to know.

“hi, rosalie,” solana replied, offering a small, tight-lipped smile. her throat felt dry, but she pushed the words out anyway. “yeah, i’m good. just, uh...thinking.”

rosalie tilted her head slightly, an amused glint in her eyes. “thinking, huh? well, thinking’s good. but you’re definitely not getting out of this one. come join vicky, salma, and i for the drill today. we need a fourth. you in?”

solana hesitated for a second, looking between rosalie, and the duo that had already paired off—vicky and salma, always a laugh, always in sync. their energy was a contrast to the quiet that lingered around solana. she could see the bond, the way they’d naturally clicked from the start, and it reminded her just how not in sync she was with anyone here.

“are you sure?” she trailed off, unsure if she was invited because rosalie genuinely wanted her to join, or if it was just out of politeness. the thought made her stomach knot. sometimes, she couldn’t tell the difference between real acceptance and just being included because there was no one else left.

rosalie’s expression softened, as if she could sense the hesitance in solana. “hey, we’re all just figuring it out. no pressure, okay? we can use your energy on the field. i am sure you're way more fun than you give yourself credit for.”

the words felt genuine enough, but solana still found herself stepping back, the weight of her own discomfort sitting on her chest. but rosalie’s smile—so easy and welcoming—pulled her in, a quiet invitation she felt she couldn’t refuse. she nodded slowly, trying not to show how unsure she was.

“yeah, of course...i’ll join.”

“great!” rosalie beamed, giving her an encouraging nod before turning toward vicky and salma, already bouncing in place, their energy infectious. solana followed, stepping onto the pitch with them, trying to remind herself it was just a drill, just another part of the day.

still, as she settled into her spot between vicky and salma, her thoughts buzzed. she watched the way vicky’s goofy comments made salma laugh, how the two of them didn’t need to say much to communicate, just a look or a smile. it was effortless, fluid.

solana felt a sharp ache in her chest, like something was missing. she wanted to laugh like that. to belong like that.

but she couldn’t make herself be like them, not in the way they made it seem so easy. so she focused. focused on the drills, the ball, the pattern of movement. just let her feet take over, moving faster than her thoughts.

she wasn’t sure if she’d ever feel like she was one of them, but she could still play. and in the game, that was enough.

but even as she tried to center herself, to give herself to the drill and the moment, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was still standing outside, just a little too far from the group.

solana watched the way vicky and salma fell into a rhythm as they moved through the drill. it wasn’t just about the ball or the positioning—it was the way they interacted. there was something so natural about the way they played off each other, their banter effortless as they worked together. vicky would throw in a cheeky comment, and salma would shoot back with a sarcastic quip, the kind of back-and-forth that didn’t need explanation. it was like a language all its own, built on years of familiarity.

as they passed the ball between them, laughing when vicky made an overly dramatic slide to intercept it, solana found herself watching a little too closely. the dynamic was so easy. salma would roll her eyes in mock annoyance before nudging vicky with her elbow, then they’d switch roles, laughing all over again. their voices bounced off each other in a way that felt like second nature. the teasing, the jokes—it wasn’t forced or awkward. it was just them, and solana couldn’t help but admire how at ease they seemed with each other.

they weren’t just teammates, she realized. they were friends, deeply comfortable with each other in a way she hadn’t felt in years. their banter wasn’t just the friendly teasing of teammates; it was the kind of back-and-forth that came from real connection, from knowing each other’s quirks and idiosyncrasies.

she felt an odd mix of awe and sadness stir within her. it was a different kind of bond than the one she had with the ball, with the field. a bond she hadn’t figured out how to form. she wasn’t sure if it was because she didn’t fit, or if it was because she was still too guarded to let herself be part of it. she didn’t know how to be that easy, to let the walls down and just be with people like vicky and salma did.

as the drill progressed, vicky made a cheeky move, sending the ball spinning past salma, who dramatically threw her hands in the air, feigning frustration.

“oh, come on! you can’t keep doing that to me, vicky,” salma laughed, shaking her head as she jogged to retrieve the ball. her voice was light, teasing, but there was warmth in it too.

vicky threw her hands up in mock innocence. “what? i’m just too good for you, salma. maybe you need a new training partner.”

salma shot her a playful glare. “try me, vicky. you’re not getting past me next time.”

they kept up their friendly back-and-forth as the drill continued, and solana found herself watching it, studying it in a way she hadn’t expected to. there was something so comforting about the ease they shared. they didn’t think about it. they didn’t need to. it just flowed between them, effortless and unspoken.

it made her wonder, for a moment, what it would be like to have that. to have someone to banter with, to joke around with, and know that there was no judgment—just a connection that was real, deep.

as the drill came to a close and the coach called for a break, vicky and salma were still laughing, still tossing the ball back and forth between them. solana, standing off to the side, couldn’t help but feel a pang of longing. maybe she wasn’t ready for the jokes or the camaraderie, but the quiet ache in her chest reminded her that she did want to be part of it.

"you good?" salma asked as she jogged up to solana, her breath still coming in short bursts from the drill. "you’ve been a bit quiet today."

solana blinked, the sudden attention making her nervous. "yeah, just... getting used to the pace, i guess."

vicky, who had come up beside salma, gave her a playful shove. “don’t worry, we’ll break you in. get you laughing like one of us.”

solana offered a small smile, the kind she always gave when trying to mask how much she wanted to say but couldn’t quite find the words. “thanks,” she said quietly. “i appreciate it.”

salma grinned, tossing the ball to her. “just remember, we’re all in this together, yeah? don’t be shy about jumping in. we’re not scary.”

"unless vicky's trying to steal your passes," salma added with a wink, making solana chuckle despite herself.

“no promises,” vicky teased, flicking the ball between her feet.

solana’s smile lingered as the two of them returned to their joking, salma tugging at vicky’s jersey as they started to head off to the water station. solana stood there for a second, a little more grounded than she had been before. still on the outside, still hesitant, but maybe, just maybe, the door to something was starting to crack open.

solana sat at the small table in the cafeteria, her eyes scanning the bustling room, the noise of laughter, conversations, and clinking cutlery rising up around her. she’d promised herself she would sit down, eat something, and try to not let the anxiety get to her. but the moment she stepped in and saw the crowded tables, the chatter, the cliques forming effortlessly, her stomach twisted. all her resolve to sit and eat disappeared in an instant.

with a deep breath, she turned on her heel, her tray of food forgotten. it wasn’t that she wasn’t hungry—she was starving, actually—but the thought of sitting among all the people, having to make small talk, having to be part of something she couldn’t seem to connect to, made her stomach churn even more. she pushed her tray onto a counter and slipped out the back door, quietly walking away.

there was a part of her that longed to be in the center of things, to have friends who pulled her into their conversations and made her laugh without effort. but the louder the room got, the smaller she felt, like a girl left behind in the chaos of people who knew how to be at ease, how to be themselves.

her thoughts spiraled, as they often did when she found herself alone. she couldn’t shake the feeling that she didn’t belong here, that no one really saw her. at the club, she was just a name on a roster, someone to watch in drills, someone to work with. but outside of that, she was invisible.

her phone buzzed in her pocket, but she ignored it. it could wait. the manager had already told her to meet after lunch, and the knot in her stomach tightened at the thought of it. the feeling of being in trouble, or being scrutinized—it made her skin crawl.

so, instead of confronting the chaos inside, solana sought refuge in the quiet upstairs corner she had claimed as her own. the top floor was always quiet, far from the main hustle of the cafeteria. she sank into the corner, the worn pages of little women offering a temporary escape. she took a slow bite of the apple the chef had coaxed her into, trying to focus on the words on the page, but the uncertainty gnawed at her mind.

alejandro stood at the bottom of the stairs, watching solana disappear into the quiet upstairs corner of the cafeteria. the sight of her leaving the bustle of the dining hall, her small figure retreating into solitude, tugged at something inside him. he didn’t know why, but he couldn’t help but seek her out again and again throughout the week. he kept finding himself watching for her—waiting to see if she’d show up in the gym, or grab a coffee in the hallway.

there was something about her, something he hadn’t quite been able to figure out. her quiet demeanor, the way she kept to herself—it both intrigued and worried him. he didn’t know her well enough to know if she had forgiven him for bumping into her and breaking her phone, but he felt guilty. he hadn’t meant to do that; he just hadn’t been paying attention. but the way she’d looked at him that day, the way she’d so quickly closed herself off, made him wonder if she was still upset, or if there was more to it.

he sighed, running a hand through his hair, trying to shake off the feeling that had started to build up. all he wanted was to make it right somehow. and maybe this—this small gesture of bringing her food—would be enough.

he moved quickly through the cafeteria, pushing aside any hesitation. grabbing a plate from the chef, he remembered what he’d seen her pick before—something simple, nothing too fancy. as the chef assembled the meal, alejandro felt a strange pressure in his chest. what if she thinks this is too much? he didn’t even know if she wanted anything from him, but still, the idea of her sitting alone, skipping lunch for a book, gnawed at him.

when the plate was ready, he didn’t waste any time. his legs moved quickly, as if pulling him toward her. and sure enough, he found her, perched in her usual spot on the top floor, buried in little women, her apple almost forgotten in her hand. the sight of her, curled into herself, lost in the world of the book, made him feel a mix of things—protectiveness, curiosity, guilt.

he approached her carefully, not wanting to startle her.

“it must be a hell of a book for you to skip out on lunch,” he said, his voice light, trying to make her feel less isolated in her corner.

she jumped at the sound of his voice, her eyes wide with surprise. alejandro noticed the way she seemed to stiffen, as if ready to retreat further into herself.

“i… wasn’t really hungry,” she said softly, closing her book as if it were a shield, clutching it to her chest. the vulnerability in her tone caught him off guard.

he held up the plate, offering it to her, trying to keep his tone casual despite the nerves building inside him. “yeah? well, i thought i’d come up here and prove you wrong. figured you might like some real food.”

her eyes flickered to the plate, then back to him, a wariness in her expression. “why… why are you doing this?” she asked, her voice small and cautious, as if she didn’t quite trust the gesture.

alejandro paused, the question hanging in the air between them. he had to admit, he didn’t have a clear answer. maybe it was the guilt from earlier in the week, or maybe it was just something about her, about the way she seemed so out of place here, so alone.

he shrugged, trying to play it off. “i don’t know,” he said, his voice lower now, almost hesitant. “i just thought you could use something more than an apple. it’s not a big deal.”

she looked at him for a long moment, her eyes searching his face as if trying to figure out his intentions. when she didn’t respond immediately, he slid onto the bench beside her, keeping a comfortable distance but still wanting to be there, in case she decided to take the food after all.

“thanks,” she said eventually, her voice barely above a whisper. “for the food, i mean. it’s nice of you.”

alejandro couldn’t help but feel a bit of relief at her words, but it was tempered by the lingering uncertainty. did she really mean that? he watched her as she picked at the apple again, her attention still divided between him and the book. he wasn’t sure what he expected her to do, but he wanted her to know that this was more than just a gesture for the sake of being polite. there was something about her that made him want to make things right.

“so… you really like that book, huh?” he asked, trying to keep the conversation light.

she looked up at him for the first time, her fingers lightly tracing the edge of the cover. “it’s… one of my favorites,” she admitted, her voice soft, but there was a vulnerability there that he hadn’t expected.

he smiled, his curiosity piqued. “you ever think about reading something else? might help with… you know, your mood.” he tried to make it sound playful, but there was an underlying sincerity in his words.

she blinked, clearly caught off guard by his suggestion. “i… guess i never thought of it like that,” she said quietly, almost surprised by the idea.

alejandro studied her for a moment, noting how she seemed to pull inward again, retreating into herself. it was a defense mechanism, he could tell, but it made him want to break through the wall she’d put up, if only a little.

“well, i think it’s cute,” he said without thinking. the words surprised both of them, and for a moment, it felt like the air between them shifted. there was a softness in his tone, a genuineness that he couldn’t quite hide.

her eyes met his, and for a moment, it seemed like there was something there—something more than just casual conversation. but then, as if the connection was too much for her to handle, she quickly shifted the subject.

“how are you liking the club?” he asked, trying to steer the conversation back, though it felt more forced now.

the moment was gone, replaced by a tightness in her expression. she closed herself off again, her walls returning with startling speed. “it’s fine,” she said, her voice cool and distant.

alejandro felt a pang of frustration. he wanted to understand her, to find a way to get through to her, but she was so guarded, so unwilling to open up.

“look, i’ve been there,” he said, leaning forward slightly, trying to offer some comfort. “starting out isn’t easy, but it’s worth it. just takes time, that’s all.”

but instead of the reassurance he expected, she simply shook her head. “thank you, alejandro. but… i don’t think it’s the same.”

his words hung in the air, and before he could say anything else, she stood up, clutching the book to her chest like a shield once again. “thanks for the food,” she murmured, offering a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

with that, she turned and walked away, leaving alejandro behind, his chest heavy with the weight of her departure. he watched her disappear into the distance, unsure of what had just happened but feeling like he hadn’t done enough. why is it so hard to reach her? he wondered, feeling a strange mix of guilt and yearning.

alejandro was halfway through the morning training session when he found himself making his way toward the locker room with a purpose. he hadn’t been able to get solana off his mind, and the guilt from their first encounter still weighed on him. he had no idea what to do about it, but he figured asking for advice might help. and who better than her teammates, salma and vicky?

he had watched them during training—he couldn’t help but notice how easily they connected with people, especially the quieter ones. if anyone could give him the insight he needed, it was them. so, after changing out of his gear and grabbing a quick snack, he found them sitting together at a small table, laughing as they flicked through their phones.

he cleared his throat, sliding into the chair beside them, and immediately their laughter quieted down, both girls eyeing him curiously.

“you okay, alejandro?” salma asked, her brow raised as she casually took a sip of water.

“yeah, i just—” alejandro hesitated, not sure how to start. “i’ve meaning to ask about solana.”

at the mention of her name, vicky’s eyes lit up. “solana? what about her?”

salma shot vicky a side glance, the hint of a smile tugging at her lips. “don’t act like you’re not curious too.”

alejandro felt a heat rise to his cheeks. great, now they’re both intrigued. “i don’t know, i just—i don’t really know her that well. she’s always so... quiet, you know?”

salma nodded, leaning back in her chair. “yeah, she’s pretty reserved. keeps to herself most of the time.”

“so, what do you want to know?” vicky asked, raising an eyebrow. “you’re not exactly subtle, alejandro. we can tell you’re looking for her.”

alejandro groaned, rubbing his hands over his face. “i’m not—i’m not trying to make it obvious. i just don’t know how to get through to her. i tried talking to her the other day, and it didn’t go too well. i think i might’ve messed things up even more.”

the two girls exchanged knowing looks, and salma crossed her arms, a teasing glint in her eyes. “you messed up? what kind of damage we are talking about, balde?.”

vicky leaned in closer, her voice dropping a little. “what exactly did you do?”

alejandro looked away, feeling the heat rise in his cheeks once more. “well... the first time we met, i accidentally bumped into her. and i—uh—broke her phone.”

salma blinked in disbelief, her eyebrows shooting up. “you did what? you broke her phone?”

“yeah,” alejandro mumbled, looking at the table in embarrassment. “it wasn’t on purpose, but... yeah, i didn’t handle it very well. she wasn’t exactly thrilled with me.”

vicky let out an exasperated sigh. “oh, alejandro. you can’t be serious. that’s not exactly the best way to make a first impression.”

salma shook her head, her lips curling into a disappointed but amused smile. “you’re lucky solana isn't a demon. if it was me i'd push you into ongoing traffic. how could you yell at innocent solana. poor girl forced to feel your wrath on her first day.”

alejandro groaned again, burying his face in his hands. “i know. i feel terrible. i’m trying to make it right, but she seems... distant. like she’s closed herself off from me completely.”

vicky raised an eyebrow. “and you think that’s because of you?”

he nodded, looking up at them in frustration. “i don’t know. maybe. i mean, she barely looks at me now. i don’t think she wants anything to do with me.”

salma and vicky exchanged another look, this time one filled with a mix of pity and mild exasperation. salma spoke first, her tone softer now. “look, alejandro, i get it. she’s a bit reserved . but that’s probably because she thinks everyone’s like you.”

“like me?” he repeated, his voice rising in disbelief. “what do you mean?”

vicky leaned forward, her tone serious. “you’re the one who accidentally broke her phone, alejandro. and you’re the one who didn’t handle it well. she probably thinks that we’re all just like you—oblivious and careless.”

alejandro’s face dropped as he absorbed the gravity of their words. “you really think she sees me like that?” he asked quietly, his guilt resurfacing.

“of course she does!” salma scolded, her voice light but firm. “she doesn’t know you well enough to know you’re not like that all the time. you did mess up.”

“and now she’s probably thinking she can’t trust any of us,” vicky added, her tone softening a little. “that’s why she’s keeping to herself. she doesn’t want to risk it.”

alejandro stared at them, feeling like he was sinking lower and lower into the ground. what have i done? he thought to himself. i didn’t mean for it to be like this.

he covered his face with his hands again, groaning in frustration. “so, what should i do? how do i fix this?”

salma and vicky exchanged a glance before salma leaned in, her voice a little gentler now. “you can try being her friend. i don’t think she has many people here yet, so maybe that’ll help. she’s not the type to just open up to anyone, but if you show her that you’re genuinely trying to be there for her, maybe she’ll let you in.”

alejandro nodded slowly, taking in what they were saying. “so, you think i should just... be there for her?”

vicky gave him a small, encouraging smile. “exactly. maybe she’ll warm up to you. but you’ve got to be patient. she’s not going to just let you waltz in after one nice gesture, no matter how much you want it.”

“yeah,” salma chimed in, “she’s been through enough with moving away fro. home to not let anyone in easily. but if you show her you’re different, it might be enough to get through.”

alejandro sat back, letting their words sink in. patience, he thought. that’s all it would take?

he let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his hair. “i’m not sure she even wants anything to do with me, though. i messed up so badly.”

salma and vicky both leaned back, their faces softening with understanding. vicky’s voice was calm as she spoke. “it’ll take time, alejandro. but that’s all you can do. keep trying. be a friend. don’t push her, but just be there. maybe she’ll come around.”

he groaned again, covering his face with both hands now, clearly frustrated. “i don’t know if i can be that patient.”

salma chuckled, a lightheartedness returning to her voice. “well, you’ve got no choice. don't come crying to us about your guilty conscious. all i am saying is start small and see where it goes.”

he nodded, though it was clear he wasn’t entirely convinced. but with a final sigh, he gave a small, resigned smile. “alright. i’ll try. thanks, you two.”

vicky grinned, giving him a playful nudge. “just don’t break anything else, alright?”

salma added, “and don’t mess it up again. or we’ll have to intervene.”

alejandro rolled his eyes but smiled at their teasing, grateful for the advice. now, he just had to figure out how to fix things with solana. one step at a time, he thought. one step at a time.

solana sat across from her manager in the small, sterile office of the training facility, her hands fidgeting nervously with the hem of her shirt. it had been a whirlwind since the move to liverpool, and she still wasn’t used to how much everything had shifted. her family had called earlier in the day, as they did every other day, and while they reassured her they were proud of her, she couldn’t shake the feeling of isolation. this wasn’t home.

“so, how’s everything been, solana?” her manager,  asked, his tone almost too casual, but his eyes were sharp. “how’s the transition been? how’s your family handling it?”

she swallowed, trying to find her voice. “it’s… it’s been okay,” she replied, a little too quickly. “i miss them, of course, but they’re doing fine. my mom’s… worried. but she says it’s good for me.”

he nodded, his gaze softening. “it’s a big change, i get that. a big step. but i think you’ll settle in just fine.”

solana wasn’t so sure. she wanted to believe that, but there was still a weight in her chest that wouldn’t go away. i don’t fit here.

“let’s talk football,” her manager continued, shifting in his chair. “we’ve been watching you, and we think it’s time to start you for the upcoming matches.”

solana froze. start? the words hung in the air, and she felt a mix of excitement and dread settle over her. she’d dreamed of starting for a top-tier team like this, but the pressure was crushing.

“that’s… great,” she said, though her voice didn’t betray the anxiety swirling inside her. “i’ll… i’ll be ready.”

her manager didn’t seem convinced. he leaned forward slightly, eyes narrowing as he continued. “listen, solana, there’s just one thing i want to address first. we’ve noticed that you’re a bit distant from the rest of the midfielders, especially in training. you’re incredibly talented, but there’s an obvious divide between you and the others. now, i know it’s tough, and i want to know—how do you think you’re fitting in with the team?”

solana felt the heat of his question hit her like a wave. her stomach twisted, and she looked down at her hands, suddenly unsure of how to respond. they don’t like me. they don’t want me here.

“i know. i’ve noticed it too,” she said quietly, guilt creeping in. “i can do better. i know i can. it’s just… i don’t know how to… connect with them. i’m trying, but it’s hard.”

her manager’s eyes softened. “i get it. it’s tough being the new person, especially when everyone’s already formed their bonds. but that’s what we need from you now—find a way to connect. i want you to start, but i need to know you’ll make the effort with the others.”

solana nodded, though she still felt a gnawing unease at the pit of her stomach. what if they don’t want me there?

“how’s everything with your psychologist appointments?” her manager asked, his voice taking on a gentler tone.

the question caught her completely off guard. solana blinked, her head snapping up. “w-what?”

“i know about your anxiety disorder,” he continued, not a hint of judgment in his voice. “i wanted to make sure you’re getting the support you need. we’re a team here, and if there’s something that might be affecting your game, i want to know about it.”

solana was stunned. she hadn’t told anyone at the club about her diagnosis—hell, she barely told her teammates that she had a therapist. the fact that her manager knew made her feel exposed, raw, but there was no malice in his eyes. just understanding.

“i didn’t—i didn’t think you knew,” solana stammered, suddenly feeling like a weight was lifting off her chest. “i… i’ve been seeing someone. it helps, but i still struggle, especially with… people. and the team. it’s hard sometimes.”

he nodded slowly. “i get that, and that’s why we’re going to give you space to breathe. but i also need to know that you’re mentally ready to start. i think you are, solana. i really do. you’re an amazing talent. that’s why we signed you. but this is about more than just football—it’s about you finding your place here.”

solana let his words settle over her. find your place—it sounded so simple when he said it, but she wasn’t sure how to even begin.

“i’ll try,” she whispered, her voice a little stronger now. “i’ll make it work.”

“i know you will,” he said with a reassuring smile. “just remember—football’s a team sport, on and off the pitch. try to connect with the others. ask them about themselves and grow bonds. we’re all here for you. take it one step at a time.”

as she stood up to leave, the weight of the conversation still pressing on her shoulders, solana felt the thin thread of hope fluttering inside her chest. maybe, just maybe, she could make this work.

next

© PDRIESTA 2025

[chacha-5]

When We Were Young, Las Vegas, Nevada 10.19.2024

📸 by Peyton Grufik

Source: idobi

The End.: https://youtu.be/AK1VGOWfDTU?feature=shared

Dead: https://youtu.be/hc5hKSfh8_0?feature=shared

Welcome To The Black Parade:

https://youtu.be/4xYjBqdnoM8?feature=shared

[thevelaryons]

All throughout Fire & Blood, Alyn has a tendency to find himself in the middle of various couples’ relationships. Whether it’s intentional or just a complete coincidence is debatable.

There’s whatever was going on in the Stepstones. Racallio clearly desired Alyn but he also wanted to see Alyn bed his wives. Was it just a ploy to make Alyn more willing to the idea of bedding Racallio later on or was there some sort of spouse sharing happening here?

Racallio kept him for more than a fortnight in his sprawling wooden fortress on Bloodstone.

[…]

When he did, the “Queen” was so delighted with him that he sent two of his wives to Oakenfist’s bedchamber that night. “Give them sons,” Racallio commanded. “I want sons as brave and strong as you.” Our sources are at odds as to whether or not Lord Alyn did as he was bid.

In the end Ryndoon allowed that the Velaryon fleet might pass, for a price. He wanted three ships, an alliance writ on sheepskin and signed in blood, and a kiss. Oakenfist gave him the three least seaworthy ships in his fleet, an alliance writ on parchment and signed in maester’s ink, and the promise of a kiss from Lady Baela, should the “Queen” visit them on Driftmark.

— Fire & Blood, Under the Regents

There are rumours abound that Alyn may have had a fling with Princess Aliandra. She was being courted by many different people at the time, including a certain Lyseni who was also the only one who Alyn was seen alone with. Later on, it’s revealed that Aliandra takes that very same Lyseni, Drazenko, as her husband.

Aliandra Martell, Princess of Dorne, came out to meet with him, accompanied by a dozen of her current favorites and suitors. The “new Nymeria” had just celebrated her eighteenth nameday, and was reportedly much taken with the young, handsome, dashing “Hero of the Stepstones,” the bold admiral who had humbled the Braavosi. Lord Alyn required fresh water and provisions for his ships, whilst Princess Aliandra required services of a more intimate nature. Bastard Born would have us believe that he provided them, Hard as Oak that he did not. We do know that the attentions the flirtatious Dornish princess lavished upon him much displeased her own lords, and angered her younger siblings, Qyle and Coryanne.

— Fire & Blood, Under the Regents

Again he sailed along the parched, dry coasts of Dorne, this time beating eastward. Princess Aliandra was pleased at his return to Sunspear, and insisted on hearing every detail of his adventures.

[…]

It was at her court at Sunspear, during the Maiden’s Day feast (the very day that a thousand maidens were parading before Aegon III in King’s Landing), that his lordship was approached by a certain Drazenko Rogare, one of the envoys that Lys had sent to Aliandra’s court, who begged a private word. Curious, Lord Alyn agreed to listen, and the two men stepped out into the yard, where Drazenko leaned so close that his lordship said, “I feared he meant to kiss me.”

— Fire & Blood, Under the Regents

Then there is the close friendship between Alyn and his family’s former enemy, Lyonel. This closeness also extends to Lyonel’s wife, Samantha. The three have similar insolent natures so it makes sense why they mesh well with each other.

Lyonel Hightower himself came forth to meet them and welcome them to his city. The courtesy with which Lord Alyn treated Lady Sam warmed Lord Lyonel to him immediately, and the two youths struck up a fast friendship that did much to put all the old enmities between the blacks and greens to rest.

[…]

By that time, he had become close to Lady Sam as well as to Lord Lyonel, though whether he had any part in the writing of her infamous letter remains a matter of conjecture.

— Fire & Blood, Under the Regents

His lordship made a brief visit to the Arbor, as Lord Redwyne’s guest, and a longer one at Oldtown, where he renewed his friendships with Lord Lyonel Hightower and Lady Sam.

— Fire & Blood, Under the Regents

[current-mcr-news]

Hi, love the blog and this might seem very random but you all have the most complete current collection of their social media posts so here goes: my friend and I found a video clip of Frank posted on a now defunct Twitter hourly acct. It's very similar to the one where he plays Thank You for the Venom but in this he has a different shirt and plays Welcome to the Black Parade instead. Included a cap from the video for reference. Was this possibly from one of his IG stories? We can't find the source or video anywhere but that one dead Twitter. Thank you so much in advance for any info you may have!

I don’t remember where it’s from but maybe someone else does?

[sketchfanda]

Chestnut Stud Across the Multiverse Party :Chestnut Herrons

Magic Man, Devil Woman!!

Krillin had been finding his ongoing witness protection gig a handful to say the very least and that wasn't just due to the fact Larau had been insatiable with her "training" for dealing with the Herron girls. Oh no sir if anything his mission partner and commanding officer was a more than welcome source of relief because in the name of all that was holy, that the ever fuckmothering hell was up with these women?!! It couldn't be possible for so many of them to look the way they do, putting porn stars to shame which was saying something given his little side gig with Zigzag!! Sweet black on Popo he hadn't felt his libido build up so much since that long, slow spaceship ride to Namek, damn Bulma parading and prancing around ina tanktop and thong, fucking tease knew what she'd been doing!!

Really who could blame him when you had a baker's dozen worth of women who had tits and asses just begging to be groped, lips that screamed dick-sucking and oooh the way they dressed, or didn't in the case of that exhibitionist among them. And something told him they were well aware what he'd been getting up with Detective Reed, the lust in their eyes alone made their intentions clear and he knew it was only a matter of time before one of them made a move. And Laura couldn't always be around to gatekeep for his safety all the time, what with the responsibilities she had in keeping this assignment running smooth as possible. But of all those size queens when it came to coming off as intense, one in particular came to mind.

That being the Satanic goth known as Joy, he could swear there was something about her, just the way she always kept those ruby blood red eyes of hers on him at all times when he came into a room. Not so much mentally undressing him as rather thinking how delicious his soul would be when she'd suck it right out of him. He'd faced the likes of Buu and Frieza and somehow she was more terrifying....it was....scarousing to say the least. So of course in moments like that for relaxation, when Laura wasn't on hand to provide relief, he'd calm himself with a little meditation as he gathered and focused his chi, keeping his sinful erotic thoughts at bay.

But of course Fate has a twisted sense of humour as was the case in today's most recent session for keeping up his ki control techniques, who should happen to see him but the devil woman herself. Having come in to deliver his lunch for him had afforded her the surprise sight of seeing the family bodyguard radiating a glowing aura which in her mind meant only one thing. That Krillin was secretly a wizard, and of course she wants to learn magic so yeah, it was going to be one of those days to say the least. So now she wanted his soul and his secrets and she was going to get them even if she had to literally and figuratively suck them out of him!!

It was unreal how lightning fast a Herron woman could move when she enters that state of mind they could only achieve upon becoming borderline bitches in heat. Joy was certainly no exception as she locked the door and turned those scary blood red eyes his way, stripping down to expose that bombshell body of hers. There was no denying, like pretty much every Herron woman, she was a sexual work of art, even with that pale athletically toned tattooed body not looking out of place with those rocking tits and that fat bubble butt. And she damn well knew it, eyeing him up like the prey she saw him as she licked her violet painted, dick sucking lips as she pounced.

However as soon as they got to the bedroom, she found that she had overestimated herself and underestimated him, begging her short king with his magical cock to break her. The pair fucking like absolute wild primal beasts that you’d quite frankly be surprised if you weren’t hearing the dulcet voice tones of a British gentleman narrating this like part of some nature documentary. The devil,worshipping, occult focused goth size queen wantonly moaning as Krillin was plowing her in a halfway position between a piledriver and a mating press. Bubble butt jiggling with every impact of his pelvis and his swaying balls, the bed shaking and creaking as the mattress springs endured the intense pace of their fucking.

How she was loving every fuck damn second of it, who knew their 50 bodyguard was such a demon between the legs and in the sack? No toy she and Jacqui shared or traded between them had ever filled and stuffed them so Damn well, inches of that oak tree of a cock hammering away, the muscles of his compact frame bursting snd rippling with power. Ecstasy filling her satanic mind as she came to see Krillin in ether orgasmic haze as some sort of demonic beast, a devil laying claim to her in mind, body and soul. Taking her to his infernal kingdom to add to a no doubt sizeable collection of sluts, bitches and whores he’d claimed with his devilish talents in eroticism.

Of course Krillin was hearing say a lot of this out loud via her string of babbling dirty talk. He’d heard a lot of kinky things from of the women he’s fucked, from his wife to sex friends, that is when they could form a proper sentence. But Joy was quite frankly a freak of a different nature and he had to really put some major effort into satisfying before she said anything weirder or wilder.

After finishing, Krillin wonders if maybe Baba was looking for an apprentice. The elder seer sister of Roshi could certainly use a potential successor and protege to take under her wing and who knows? Maybe a little discipline might sway Joy from going down certain, dark twisted paths. If her dirty talk was anything to by, thst girl had some twisted little fantasies…..

As for Joy, who laid in the soaked sheets of the emoji shed bed, she dreamt sweet, sinful dreams in the afterglow in which she basked. Dreaming of Krilli as some goblin or oni overlord or a god of destruction. Dominating herself snd her family as he asserted his will upon them with his powerful cock, enslaving them to his raw, manly charisma. She wasn’t sure if he was indeed a magic man but damn if he wasn’t magic in the bedroom….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Brainy Babes stick together

Janine Herron, being the brainiac among her misfit clan, naturally has always looked up to one Bulma Briefs, seeing her as her idol and role model. Really why wouldn't she when someone like her had it all, beauty, brains and the wealth and success to match. When she wasn't thinking about big cocks and the peculiar sciences in regards to them and her family's genetic quirks tied to them, she'd often dream of the chance to meet and speak with her. What would she ask, the ideas they'd share, the back and forth brainstorming sessions...

So of course you can imagine her delight when Krillin let it slip that he knows her personally, a slip of the tongue as the pair sat together at the kitchen table in their safehouse. After a rather tame conversation that'd not been too erotic, with the egghead having expressed her admiration of Bulma, it just popped into his head. So now Janine, eyes twinkling with excitement, was begging to meet her and really, it was a challenge to even think of telling her no what with those big puppy dog eyes. So after running it by Laura, for the sake of permission and procedure, he had set up an encrypted video call and stood observing as the sexy science babes wasted no time in talking.

But of course just because she was the geeky one didn't mean she was any less a size queen slut than the rest of her relatives currently under his protection as Janine was giving out different ideas for the sex toy portion of the company, especially the Warrior Monks. Which seemed to be particularly intriguing to Bulma who had quite the quizzical look on her face before Krillin saw her get a look on her face that he recognised all too well as meaning she was up to some mischief. The Briefs genius woman then looked at Janine and said in no uncertain tone or terms to use him to show her what she can do. Adding to the cherry on top of this illicit sundae by revealing the aforementioned sex were based on none other than Krillin.

Naturally this got Janine excited as well as aroused as eager to show off for her idol, she jumped at the chance. Proceeding to start things off as she grabbed Krillin within her reach and pulled him for a kiss, enacting a deep passionate liplock which was really packing a lot of tongue. Bulma watching on as she licked her lips sensually in anticipation of what was sure to be a good show. It was pretty clear she and 18 shared that particular voyeurism streak when it came to him and other women, lord only knows what that long trip to Namek would've been like had the crew been her, him and another sexy female body to likely walk around in just a thong and a tanktop?

For the Capsule Corp CEO’s further enjoyment of course, her voyeur show only got better once Krillin started returning the make-out in turn, his hands feeling up the busty, curvy brainiac’s body all over in the right places. Clothes going flying off before Janine laid her eyes for the first time on the compact beefcake’s stiffening schlong, an awestruck expression on her face as her brain ran a mile minute. Oh she’d heard details and had some theories but to think such a little man could be packing such length and girth on him? This was well past any particular standards for Herron women, if anything it was a new record for the ideal cock!!

It was small wonder her brain and libido went hand in had in taking the helm of the controls, making her body move on instinct and go wil with assaulting that cock with pleasure. Almost forgetting Bulma was watching all this happen as she was practically making herself get facefucked, sucking and blowing on Krillin’s cock as she licked and blew it. Drowning it in her saliva as her dicksucking lips held a firm grasp on that shaft, making Krillin buck his hips in response. Which made Janine feel her pussy quiver and dribble with a growing need to have that cock wok it’s magic and fuck her so had that she’d feel like she was losing precious braincells.

Which pretty much became the case one the short king proceeded to do just that, the bimbo bookworm screaming like a sexual banshee as she was held up in the air by this sex god among men. Feet planted in the ground as he performed a standing fuck, arms hooked around Janine’s lovely legs with his hands grabbing her bubble butt. Bucking and pumping his hips as she found herself bouncing and riding on that jackhammering cock, making her drool from the rush of orgasmic energy surging through her. Her face making it plenty clear she felt like she was being fucked stupid which made quite a contrast with her particular, uniquely her style of dirty talk.

Bulma of course was loving each and every second of this live show, shamelessly playing with herself in her private office as she thrust a Warrior Monk dildo into dribbling pussy. Free hand playing with her tires as she watched Janine get taken through the Krillin style kama sutra from the full nelson rodeo to the prone bone powerplay and handling snout as well as every one of her rest lives who’d had the experience so far. Shuddering as she recalled those sweet, sexy times on that month long trip to Namek, among other such instances she’d gotten her dose of chestnut loving. Which reminded her, she really did need to make sure the latest batch of Warrior Monks were in need of their next test runs……

When it was finally all said and done, Janine sat in Krillin’s lap with her back pressed to his front panting as the afterglow took a hold of them. Bulma shuddering in her own orgasmic haze ashes grinned at seeing the brainiac Herron’s pussy overflowing, the short king’s cock still in there thanks to its tight embrace. Before the bookworm and the ceo soon got to talking business of course, regardless of the fact neither of them was in anyway decent. But hey details, right?

Krillin wasn’t paying much attention to the conversation, just tuning out as he knew he was going to need some liquid hydration and likely a sensei bean or two. But far as he could gather, seems like the two of them were hitting it off just fine and sure to get along famously. Oh if he only knew for sure just how true that would be, never mind how the rest of his Herron bodyguard experience would go. It was going to be a long, hectic mission to say the least….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Avoiding Public Indecency

Now of course just because the Herron ladies were being kept under surveillance in witness protection didn’t mean they couldn’t be kept under lockdown, after all most of them would be sure to go stir crazy. Which meant that for Krillin, it was sure to one way or another wind up with the risk of one or more of those thirsty bitches going into heat and and want to pounce on him. So of course, per Laura’s insistence on procedure, if and when they had to get out and about in the city then it would be with Krillin as their chaperone, given his capabilities and skill. Not that it made some of them au less of a handful especially with the resident brats Jen and Jenna being how they were….

But in this case, today it was Victoria out wandering the city with him along as bodyguard, a first for the short king interacting with this blonde. Like any Herron girl, she was seemingly a wet dream given physical shape and form with the taste and style for fashion made to show it off but so far so good, she seemed to be one of the more better and well behaved ones. Was it really possible he had found the saint among the whole brood besides Vera? However that turned out to be a case of him just pretty much tempting fate as Victoria soon finds she needed to take her clothes off, right then and there in the goddam open!!

Yes this was our compact gentleman learned first hand a little detail about Victoria Herron, that she was a goddamn exhibitionist and he knew Laura would skin him alive with a stunt like this. So of course he wasted no time in scrambling into action as he grabbed her and got her out of the public eye but just barely as he now found himself naked in an alley way with her. Now in nothing but her her high heel shoes and a smile as she stood naked as the day she was born, shameless arousal on her face crystal clear. Yes indeed her exhibitionist streak had kicked in, the risk and thrill of almost if not nearly exposing herself like that combined with even the small risk of being caught turning her on.

Krillin he could tell he had just gone for the frying pan and into the fire as Victoria was no doubt entering that bitch in heat state of mind he found was a common trait of Herron women. Next to their obsessive fondness for big cocks and having stunning pornographic bodies of course and just his luck, this was the most absolute shameless exhibitionist among the bunch. The erectness of her nipples, the shameless using of her slit as her thighs became soaked, a puddle dribbling to the floor at her feet, he was dealing with a ticking time bomb here and he had to defuse it. But before he coild eben talk her down out of her lusty state of mind and try to get her back into her clothing, she was soon turning the charm on him and getting him stripped as well, making out with him as she caressed and locked lips with the compact stud.

The moment the kinky blonde freak shoved her tongue into his mouth was when the short king felt his libido kick into full gear as it took the helm. Returning the kiss much to Victoria's delight as she wasted no time in stripping him of his clothes until he was as naked as she was but the moment she got his pants and boxers off? The only thing drooling as much as her mouth was her slutty pussy as she beheld the glory of that full mast length and girth of pulsing fuckmeat standing to attention. Promising her that she'd be utterly destroyed, in her warped kinky mind as her arousal skyrocketed at the thrill of the risk of being caught out in the open in the act of rutting with this absolute unit of a sex god in a compact package.

Small wonder then that she was on her knees on the cool concrete floor, proceeding to commence with a deep, powersucking blowjob with an intensity that would make Jessica nod in pride and approval. Her lust drunk blue eyes looking up at the compact stud with total absolute worship and devotion as she licked and blew on his cock, lips kissing the base and his heavy balls with not a damn given about suffocating as she deepthroated him. Her delight only increasing with her horniness as she felt the short king buck his hips out of reflex in response as he aimed to sate this thrill seeking succubus. The sooner he got her off, the better they could escape being caught.

Which was easier said than done as the risk and sheer sexual thrill at being caught and seen in the act was pretty her fetish of choice and it showed. Screaming her lungs out as she moaned like a wanton hoe as she was currently bent over and pressed up against the alley wall, a raw ahegao expression on her face as she gasped with delight at the impact of Krillin’s jackhammering pelvis. Inches of his bitch pleasing womb hammer sinking away into her snatch as her bubble butt jiggled and her clit was smacked by those swaying balls. Her arousal only increased with orgasmic intensity as she found the little man having to get rough just to get her to try being quiet.

Now Krillin didn’t usually like to get too rough with a woman when pleasing her sexually but with Victoria and her being a Heron and all, it was a necessity. Hand covering her mouth to having to choke and strangle her or outright make her suffocate on his cock with heavy facefucking, whatever worked to turn her volume down. Which only added to her orgasmic bliss as she rode the tidal wave of pleasure that flowed throughout her every nerve, urging him on and finding he really got riled up being called Daddy. Victoria could definitely say, this made top of the list of her top 5 or 3 acts of exhibitionism to say the very least especiallt when he’d blow his hot, heavy loads….

When they were finally, thankfully done, the two quickly head back to the safe house, clothes in hand while still naked and hiding out of sight, Krillin praying that he avoids a public indecency charge. So damn thankful for being able to sense life energy as well as he could, really handy for dealing with a total exhibitionist. Olivier would not be happy with that incident report even if he happened to be her personal favourite unofficial comfort officer. She was so damn scarousing when she got mad......

Unknown someone actually did see them, recorded it and posted it online. Though depending who you ask, this someone seemed to like what they saw enough that it was shared only among a select few. but spread enough to rack up quite a number of views. I'm talking numbers mathmeticians have never even heard of here.....and yes 18 was among them and ooh did she liked what she saw. It was a while since this whole protection project started so seeing that her man was at least getting his balls drained around the clock was a nice peace of mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good Morning Wood

Krillin found it a miracle he could get sleep sometimes what with Laura and his ever increasing intimate interactions with the Herron Ladies. Quite frankly it made her unorthodox but effective "training" all the more effective at being put to to use and it certainly helped given his....wealth of experience so to speak. Now if only he could at least not have so many damn wet dreams, it was a hassle waking up with morning wood and not having Laura or any of prior Herrons he'd been freaky with beside him to help him out on easing it. Who knew the lovely Detective Reed had such an adorable look to her when she was sucking him off with a little surprise blowjob?

Funnily enough as the morning sun stirred him with its rays flooding his room, he'd found his current dream way too vivid and real when he grunted and groaned at the lucid sensations around his groin. It was then he finally woke up to find out what the hell was going on, seeing a very distinct female sheet under his bedsheets, meaning his source was the feeling of soft, skilled dick sucking lips. At first he thinks maybe it is Laura wanting some early morning fun once again that was however not the case when he felt a painful grip on his balls, causing him to finally pull his sheets away and sees it is none other than Jessica, the resident cum addict among the Herron ladies. The blowjob specialist no doubt had wanted a taste of Krillin after hearing one of his more recent escapades with her cousins, no doubt it had to be that one time or other in the sauna (you'll findout sooner or later, don't you worry).

Admittedly as much of a shock as it was, the raw primal lust in Jessica's blue eyes glowed and twinkled as she bobbed her head away, effortlessly deepthroating his shaft with powersuck intensity like just the taste and flavour of his pre was enough too make her want his seed all the more. Licking, slurping, blowing and sucking away with abandon as if making it clear she was more than willing and able to be his personal oral dicksleeve. And much more of course if he desired to also blow her backout with a little thank you for this erotic wake-up call, given how much of her love nectar was soaking the bedsheets. So as much as he should be annoyed right now, he couldn't deny that he was always a sucker for getting wake up calls like this, so what the hey right?

Krillin then proceeded to just go with the flow as he rested his hand on Jessica's head, grasping her blonde mane firmly while he adjusted his position to stand up. Feet firmly planted on the mattress while maintaining the connection of his cock in her mouth, he flexed his muscles and, to her sheer delight, began bucking his hips. Soon face-fucking the oral whore as glowing hearts formed in her eyes to the thrill of this big cocked short king taking the chance to assert his dominance like this. Krillin figuring since he was up, why not decide to use this early morning energy to build up a good appetite for breakfast, only for the quirky sense of humour of fate to rear her head and show her hand, as the door to his room was opened by Laura who'd come on over to be serve him breakfast in bed.

Now in a cliche sort of story or situation, you'd expect all manner of comical hijinx that would see Krillin get needlessly put through some grief but come on, really? You all know how this story is so of course the next thing the short king knew, Laura was in the bed beside Jessica as the pair seemed to duel for the attention of his cock. The dusky chocolate skinned officer doing her best to deal with the semen junkie Herron who seemed intent on sucking out his soul. Lips and tongues back and forth as his length and girth was plunging into their warm, wet mouths which caused him to buck his hips in response.

it wasn’t long before breakfast briefly became forgotten about as it was out aside, the bed shaking and rocking as this double team blowjob duel escalated into a full on threesome. Jessica sitting atop Krillin’s face as she had him eat her out while she leaned forward to lick away at the connected loins of him and Laura who currently rode him cowgirl style. The oral fixated Herron eager and thirsting for more of his cum, to feel his shaft stuff her mouth and throat once again and give her that delicious protein contained within his golden balls. And it omly got wilder and lewder from there.

A few of the other girls who were uo for breakfast were currently eavesdropping, ears pressed to the door as they listened in on this wild threesome. Having been concerned and curious as to where their cute little bodyguard was though some put two and two together once they figured out Jessica was missing. Mentally torn between feeling pissed because that damn jizz junkie best some of them to the punch and horny, feeling their slutty pussies quiver with thst deep, erotic thirst. Really wishing they had a mean to see inside the room because no way they could all crowd around the damn keyhole!!

Back inside of course, heedless of their unknown voyeur audience, Krillin still went at it with Laura and Jessica as the latter was shown to naturally be as much a freak for getting pounded in her ass and pussy but still nothing compared to how much she loved it orally. Laura of course driven by a sort of alpha female instinct to assert her dominance over the slut, reminding herself she was doing it to protect her compact partner from falling into the clutches of these damn size queens. Mentally claiming to herself it was for the sake of keeping him safe and focused on the mission, it wasn’t like she wanted to have him more to herself. Even if he was a hell of a sex machine in bed, he was really taking those resistance training sessions like a fish to water…

A couple of orgasms later, Jessica was having her limp, sated naked body hauled out by Judith, a fucked silly smile on her face as she rubbed her belly. She had to say that was some of the tastiest, mos filling sperm she’d ever enjoyed devouring, it was addictive. Well worth the lecture she’d no doubt get for trying to be a greedy, thirsty little cocksucker for sure. Though far as some of her fellows were concerned, she was going to have to learn a damn pecking order.

Laura:*Busy massaging a weary, spent Krillin in the luxury bath as she fed him that overdue breakfast. Feeling a small bit rightfully smug for managing to one over on a Herron even if it wasn’t Veronica as she helped ease any ache from having such an intense early morning fucking.*”And that right there is why you always got to keep your guard up around those thirsty bitches…”*Still having them all in one place focused ona guy like him? Certainly made this job a lot easier…and maybe just a slight bit fun.*

[mightyflamethrower]

U.S. — In yet another step toward the advancement of protections for all people groups, activists announced today that MS-13 had officially been added to the LGBTQ+ acronym to ensure that the rights of violent foreign gang members were recognized.

Civil rights groups hailed the announcement as a significant step forward in the ongoing crusade to see MS-13 gang members be given their rightful place in society among other persecuted groups after decades of mistreatment and ostracism.

"MS-13 gang members are some of the most oppressed and vulnerable in our society," said LGBTQMS-13 activist Cherise Hargrave. "For far too long, we have been forced to watch brave MS-13 gang members get shunned and shamed, with people demanding that they hide who they truly are. No more! It's time for MS-13 members to be celebrated for their valuable and important contributions to our world." Members of the dangerous gang welcomed the news. "It's about time," said Enrique Marquez, who has eight murders on his resume. "I have lived every day of the last 10 years in fear of being arrested, deported, and held accountable for the vicious acts I commit on a regular basis. Now, I can be a proud member of the LGBTQMS-13 community."

Sources said production had begun on a new flag that would add MS-13 symbols and a black teardrop tattoo emblem to the LGBTQ banner, and that Los Angeles would host the first MS-13 Pride Parade later this year.

At publishing time, the Los Angeles Dodgers had announced that Sunday, May 18, would be "MS-13 Day" at Dodger Stadium to celebrate and honor all brave cartel members.

[downtoearthmarkets]

May the luck of the Irish be with you as St. Patrick’s Day arrives next Monday! St. Patrick's Day was originally observed in Ireland with religious services and feasts in honor of the country’s patron saint. When Irish immigrants brought their traditions to the United States, the day evolved into a secular celebration of the Emerald Isle’s culture, people and heritage marked by parades, music, dancing, green attire, and a host of special Irish food and drinks.

Whatever your plans for this fun and festive holiday weekend, your Down to Earth farmers market will have an array of locally grown, sourced and produced goodies to make your St. Paddy’s Day spread as green, jolly and delicious as can be!

Irish Breakfast What better way to kick off your celebrations than a traditional Irish breakfast? This tasty meal likely evolved from its close counterpart, the full English breakfast, that became popular during the Victorian era with farm laborers needing substantial and energy-rich sustenance to fuel their grueling day’s work. The hearty fare typically features bacon, eggs, sausage, grilled tomatoes, mushrooms, fried potatoes, and black and white pudding served with a side of soda bread or brown bread for soaking up the juices. The full Irish breakfast is a symbol of Irish hospitality and considered a great way to start the day on a strong note.

Your St. Paddy’s Day classic Irish breakfast will have extra appeal when this recipe is made with pasture-raised eggs, grass-fed meat and fresh, local veggies from the farmers market:

Ingredients for 2 servings:

3 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 Goode & Local by Don Rodrigo Mangalitsa pork sausages

4 rashers Goode & Local by Don Rodrigo hickory-smoked bacon

1 large Jersey Farm Produce hothouse tomato

1 cup Mushrooms.NYC King Oyster mushrooms, sliced

1 tablespoon Maplebrook Farm butter

2 potato cakes made with Halal Pastures Farm potatoes

Wave Hill Breads brown bread, for toast

Kosher salt

Black pepper

Irish Stew The first Irish stew recipe dates to the 1600s when this simple, rustic preparation was made with just mutton, potatoes, and onions by shepherds and rural farmers who could access only a few ingredients but needed a hearty and nourishing meal. While it has evolved and adapted over time to include a variety of ingredients and cooking methods like in this recipe, it remains a classic dish to serve on St. Patrick’s Day or anytime you’re craving warming winter comfort food.

Irish Pies Pies have long been a part of Irish culinary tradition as a way to celebrate the bounty of the land while using up leftover ingredients, making them a practical and economical option. Noble Pies has a full menu of festive St. Paddy's Day-themed pies and traditional Irish goodies to make your life as easy as pie this weekend! Place your pre-order on their website for these delectable sweet and savory options:

Corned Beef & Cabbage

Onion & Leek Quiche

Sweet Leprechaun Pie

Green Key Lime Cream Pie

Green Chocolate Cream Pie

Irish Oatmeal Scones

Chocolate Guinness Cake

Irish Soda Bread

Irish Coffee The Irish Coffee was born on a dark and stormy winter’s night in 1942 at Foynes Airbase on the wild west coast of Ireland. At that time, the airbase was a key refueling depot and stop-off for civilian air travel between Europe and the Americas, often welcoming Hollywood celebrities and other high-profile passengers. An airport restaurant was created to cater for these dignitaries who were often midway through their long journeys and in need of refreshments.

That famous night a passenger plane destined for New York was forced to return to Foynes due to severe weather over the Atlantic before making another flight attempt the next day. Upon hearing of the aircraft’s imminent return, head chef and bartender Joe Sheridan hastily prepared coffees mixed with brown sugar, Irish whiskey and cream to revive and comfort the cold and weary passengers. After sipping on the warming elixir, one of the passengers piped up and asked, “Are these Brazilian coffees?” to which Sheridan replied “No, they’re Irish coffees!”. And thus, the legend of Irish Coffee was born.  

Add some pep to your step this St. Patrick’s Day with this classic Irish coffee recipe featuring the bold flavor of Cano Coffee Company’s dark roast to offset and complement a shot of strong Irish whiskey. Cano Coffee Company’s beans are grown on small, family-owned microlots in the high mountains of El Huila, Colombia and roasted in New York. Their beans are handpicked at the fully developed stage by experienced cafeteros, then spring water washed and sundried to perfection.

Ingredients

1 cup hot, black, freshly brewed Cano Coffee Company Midtown Rush Dark

2 teaspoons brown sugar

1 shot Irish whiskey of your choosing

Double cream

Directions

Heat a tall, traditional Irish coffee glass with boiling water.

Pour away the water, add the brown sugar and coffee and stir until the sugar has completely dissolved.

Add a shot of whiskey to the coffee and stir slowly to mix.

Using a jug with a thin spout, pour cream slowly over the back of a warm spoon onto the coffee without breaking the surface until you reach the rim of the glass.

While you’re busy enjoying these classic Irish delights, we hope you find your lucky four-leafed clover and pot-o-gold at the end of the rainbow this St. Patrick’s Day weekend! We look forward to seeing you in the farmers market.

[theroyalsims]

ELEANORE'S A BLONDE NO MORE! THE HARVELLES ATTEND NEIGHBOURHOOD PARTY IN COSTUME!

It's officially Spooky Fest and that typically means trick or treating and costume parties galore, and The Earl and Countess of Harvelle, with their little darling Lady Ella, were spotted attending one yesterday!

The entire family donned costumes for the neighbourhood bash, with Eleanore dressing up as a popular fairytale princess (complete with a black wig), while her real-life (former) Crown Prince dressed up as... well... Prince Charming. A little on the nose, yes, but it's also kind of adorable, especially if you add little Ella into the mix, who also came as a "princess" complete with a "golden" plastic tiara!

The family of three walked to the party, held a couple of houses down their country home. The party was a fun time for the neighbourhood kids to play, have fun, and indulge in sweets! One source shared:

"It was really for the kids, but the parents had loads of fun, too. There was good food and even greater company. There were about 20 adults and just as many kids. They had a clown and a bouncy house set up, too. There was a face painting booth and a photo booth. Everyone had a blast."

When asked about the Harvelle's attendance, the source further revealed:

"They've become part of the community. They know everyone and everyone knows them, of course. There were no curtseys or formalities - they came as Eleanore and Ibrahim and everyone adores little Ella. That girl is such a sweetheart. I think that's a huge part of why they love it here and they decided to settle here. We leave them be, give them their privacy, but at the same time we've let them know that they're welcome here."

However, not everyone is as "welcoming" to the family's choice of costume. Some commenters online have poked fun at the family's choice of outfits for the soiree. One person wrote:

"This is kinda sad and a lot hilarious. Ibrahim, in particular, should've thought twice about wearing that. This is a man who would've been a KING of a d*mn country. A REAL LIFE KING. And now here he is parading in a §10 costume, looking like a loon. Pathetic."

Another wrote:

"Eleanore's trying really, really hard to stay relevant and remind everyone that she's a princess. Yeah. You were. Once. And now you aren't. Because you were a massive spoiled brat and because you wanted to compete with your sister. But you'll never be Anya. This is so cringe. And the kid... I feel bad for her for being born into that mess of a family. Someone tell Eleanore her kid's no princess coz the queen didn't make her one. I give the whole "marriage" 5 years, tops. Their (sic) both narcissists and you just know that they're getting tired of each others (sic) crap. This is very desperate and so low even for them."

Well, you just can't please everybody, so it seems. For what it's worth, we think Lady Ella looks adorable, and we're 100% convinced every little girl deserves to be treated like a princess - royal or not.

Happy Spooky Fest to the Harvelles! 🎃

[un-deserts-your-bluffs]

this is not about jaws (1975), this is for introject ask meme for whoever wants to do it, i'll take a 21. What songs remind you of your source? thank u

Hello. Pokotho Here. Seeing As How I Am A Being Of Music, Most Of The Songs I Wrote For My Hive Mind Remind Me Of My Source- "Let It Out" Most Strongly, However. Additionally, All The Songs From Workin' Boys. My Husband (<333) Wrote It And I Love Him. and yk what two for one here hey it's lily and pretty much every mcr song reminds me of source but ig most strongly it's welcome to the black parade. that song fucks hard idc if its got 'weird' connotations weird is great

[lets-talk-spirituality]

https://www.tumblr.com/lets-talk-spirituality/723310673106468864/httpswwwtumblrcomlets-talk-spirituality72330?source=share

Thanks boo 😘🥰

Hellllllloooooooo, omg I had so much fun writing this, reading through everything and dissecting information. It reminded me how much I love to research and learn.

But buckle up peoples this is a long one. 

**Initial thoughts while watching the video (before any research or reading anything):

The ladder at the beginning

Is he finally coming down to earth? (The rover from mars, finally coming back down to earth.)

Where is he coming from and where does this ladder lead?

Was he up there looking for something?

Then later I had the thought if this was purgatory, but I’ll explain later

Celesine Venus and lyric matching

That caught my eye fast but I didn’t know where it was from 

Also the lyrics are matching what’s in the video, very show and tell because when he sings reading your horoscope we see the Celesine and a woman in the background with a book which has a zodiac sign (credit to this post for catching that https://www.tumblr.com/illicitaffairs1989/723335756122374144/harold-never-beating-the-im-still-thinking-about)

He’s on a roof when he sings that lyric 

And with the snake person, would she carry a antidote because she works with snakes?

Cloud Box

This caught my eye, and it could just be a transitional piece for the music video

But it was coffin like and represents the sky

And the way he bursts out and cuts to the cannon and him flying

Blue-and-yellow macaw 

Literally the only form of a blue bird we get but it’s mixed with yellow.

Any form of a true blue bird is missing

Santus Circus 

I wanted to check if this had any meaning and it’s an actual circus and they provide their equipment.

Which is pretty of cool of Harry and nice for the circus, hopefully they get tons of business now.

If anyone is interested here’s their social: https://www.instagram.com/p/Cu4tb-dsQEr/?hl=en

Harry on a horse

At first I was like are you showing off, peacocking here cause he looks cute on a horse I will say

But it kind of interesting to end on this darker look but the contrast against the blue sky, chef kiss again.

Fashion

I alway love the styling and fashion choices in Harry’s work, they’re just a chef kiss. This video is probably my favorite so far. I loved the skeleton 

I loved the last outfit, the skeleton one (Welcome to the Black Parade anyone?) this was designed by Steve O Smith - highly suggest checking his work out, it really cool. https://www.instagram.com/steve_o_smith/?hl=en

Harry’s the only male and his place and role in the circus

Normally his videos feature a wide variety of people and genders 

And this one he’s surrounded by women 

Also what his role in the circus? Is he the ring master, what is his place? It feel like there’s something missing. A puzzle piece.

———

**Initial thoughts on what lets-talk-spirituality wrote:

I love your poem, it’s like the state of celebrity and how we read gossip and find entertainment out of their lives and rough patches they go through and we forget that they are real people. And I feel for Harry, I feel since he started, people have said so many things about him, blown parts of his life way out of proportion and treat him like an object. And he was so young and had to navigate all that b.s.

The colors and Truman show:��

I noticed the colors as well, they felt familiar for some reason, but yes very vivid and dream like.

I haven’t watch the Truman show and I have to check it out, I know the concept of it, but it’s interesting. Why is he climbing back down. Was he made to climb back down? 

Mirrors:

Thank you! I was trying to figure out the mirrors at first.

I was thinking of the lyric “We don't really like what's on the news, but it's on all the time” and all the stuff that’s said about him

Self reflection and growth he’s going, maybe his spiritual journey, he’s learning and growing

Maybe he is in a time of self reflection, has he had time to reflect and also thinking about everything, he’s been on the go-go for so long.

Penny farthing bike and vintage circus 

Yes that’s for sure that kind of bike, and it’s interesting because I always found those bikes scary, I’m scared of heights so that fall would hurt.

And a pull from the wiki article: It became obsolete in the late 1880s with the development of modern bicycles, which provided similar speed amplification via chain-driven gear trains and comfort through pneumatic tires, and were marketed in comparison to penny-farthings as "safety bicycles" because of the reduced danger of falling and the reduced height to fall from.

Another interesting pull: Although the trend was short-lived, the penny-farthing became a symbol of the late Victorian era. Its popularity also coincided with the birth of cycling as a sport. Playing with symbols again.

Also I love the vintage vibe, I always noticed that with some of his music videos how he pulls from the past and the mood board for this video has a lot of vintage elements: https://www.tumblr.com/hldailyupdate/723293053705699328/moodboard-for-the-daylight-music-video-19-july?source=share, maybe his past lives and he has a love for the past, looking at the past, something is there.

But in this music video he’s playing with heights, and trying to reach heights, and there’s a risk when you’re doing these stunts and trying to reach heights. If you fall you’re going to get hurt bad. 

Charlie Chaplin:

Yes, let’s freaking go, I love old school Hollywood and the start of cinema, I don’t know if you ever listen to this podcast: http://www.youmustrememberthispodcast.com but its so good and gives great context to what was going on and stories lost to history. 

But things that stood out to me: The Tramp, as portrayed by Chaplin, is a childlike, bumbling but generally good-hearted character who is most famously portrayed as a vagrant who endeavours to behave with the manners and dignity of a gentleman despite his actual social status. 

Chaplin's social commentary, while critical of the faults and excesses created by industrialization, also shows support for and belief in the "American Dream".

The obsession of working with efficiency and assembly-line productivity ultimately drives the Tramp mad. This could be seen as "an attack on the capitalist rationalization of production." However, "the film also guardedly affirms American middle-class, particularly its optimism." For example, one sequence depicts the Tramp's dream in which he and the gamine live a traditional middle-class lifestyle.

Sad Clown:

Omg I think I missed this convo 😭, but I do remember the look and I was like another David Bowie inspired piece, ashes to ashes, funk to funky, We know Major Tom's a junkie, Strung out in heaven's high, Hitting an all-time low, Bowie’s character in that video is Pierrot. 👀👀👀

four horseman of the apocalypse

This is fascinating, I did see a white horse in the background of the YT thumbnail but we never see it in the video

This line you pulled is interesting: the third carries a balance scale, rides a black horse, and symbolizes famine. One of Harry’s signs is Libra and the symbol for Libra is the scales. The scales reveal Libra's need for justice, balance, harmony, and fair play. Libra's glyph is representative of an equal sign or the horizon with the Sun rising above it.

Celestine Venus

I have to check that book out, and the Venus thing, hmmm

The wiki for the book had this interesting line: The book is a first-person narrative of spiritual awakening. The narrator is in a transitional period of his life and begins to notice instances of synchronicity, which is the belief that coincidences have a meaning personal to those who experience them.

Him as the only man

I was trying to work through this, and that was a order of thought I had too, I always remember this clip from he James Corden show where he says its tough out there: https://youtu.be/Vc7IswqXN5U?t=170 

To the left, to the left!

This I did not think of! And holy crap what an interesting article and something I noticed but never gave much thought. Us humans are so fascinating the way we give meaning to things. But the idea of left and right holding meaning. 

The left symbolizes death or darkness I think we get sacred with death and darkness, but death could be a new beginning and darkness you’ll never know what you’ll find and he fell willingly. He’s taking the risk, hmmm

Napoleon and  horses in art:

Wiki for Napoleon section: The refusal to attend a sitting marked a break in the portraiture of Napoleon in general, with realism abandoned for political iconography: after this point the portraits become emblematic, capturing an ideal rather than a physical likeness.

And the whole Influences section.

And the horses in art article was very insightful, these two stood out to me:

Without a doubt, as we said earlier, some of the most famous horse paintings were created during the emergence of Romanticism. (Harry the romantic.)

Because they are not so ever-present in our society anymore, horses have stopped being such a frequent sight in artworks. Cars replaced carriages, tanks replaced cavalry and horse races, although still in existence, are generally interesting because of the betting and the money. It could be said that, in Contemporary art, the steeds could still be depicted for their graciousness and nobility, rather than a specific role they have in modern-day life. 

———

**My thoughts / more in-depth:

*The Ladder*

This was bothering me, like it was the first thing, where is it going, why is he coming down from it. So I started looking into a ladder leading to the sky to figure out the symbolism, I was starting to think is it stairs to heaven? But it’s a ladder. And when I think of the sky I think of the heavens and space etc. But after finding what I found it made me think, is he in purgatory?

So what I found was the story of Jacob's Ladder, I’ll pull some interesting things:

Wiki Article: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob%27s_Ladder

Jacob's Ladder a ladder leading to heaven that was featured in a dream the biblical Patriarch Jacob had during his flight from his brother Esau in the Book of Genesis (chapter 28). The significance of the dream has been debated, but most interpretations agree that it identified Jacob with the obligations and inheritance of the people chosen by God, as understood in Abrahamic religions.

Biblical narrative

The description of Jacob's Ladder appears in Genesis 28:10–19:

And Jacob went out from Beer-sheba, and went toward Haran. And he lighted upon the place, and tarried there all night, because the sun was set; and he took one of the stones of the place, and put it under his head, and lay down in that **place to sleep. And he dreamed**, and behold a ladder set up on the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven; and behold the angels of God ascending and descending on it. And, behold, the LORD stood beside him, and said: 'I am the LORD, the God of Abraham thy father, and the God of Isaac. The land whereon thou liest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed. And thy seed shall be as the dust of the earth, and thou shalt spread abroad to the west, and to the east, and to the north, and to the south. And in thee and in thy seed shall all the families of the earth be blessed. And, behold, I am with thee, and will keep thee whithersoever thou goest, and will bring thee back into this land; for I will not leave thee, until I have done that which I have spoken to thee of.' And Jacob awaked out of his sleep, and he said: 'Surely the LORD is in this place; and I knew it not.' And he was afraid, and said: 'How full of awe is this place! this is none other than the house of God, and this is the gate of heaven.' And Jacob rose up early in the morning, and took the stone that he had put under his head, and set it up for a pillar, and poured oil upon the top of it. And he called the name of that place Beth-el, but the name of the city was Luz at the first.

— Genesis 28:10–19

Christianity

Jesus said in John 1:51 "And he saith unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Hereafter ye shall see heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending upon the Son of man." This statement has been interpreted as associating or implicating Jesus with the mythical ladder, in that Christ bridges the gap between Heaven and Earth. Jesus presents himself as the reality to which the ladder points; as Jacob saw in a dream the **reunion of Heaven and Earth**, Jesus brought this reunion, metaphorically the ladder, into reality. Adam Clarke, an early 19th-century Methodist theologian and Bible scholar, elaborates:

That by the angels of God ascending and descending, is to be understood, that a perpetual intercourse should now be opened between heaven and earth, through the medium of Christ, who was God manifested in the flesh. Our blessed Lord is represented in his mediatorial capacity as the ambassador of God to men; and the angels ascending and descending upon the Son of Man, is a metaphor taken from the custom of dispatching couriers or messengers from the prince to his ambassador in a foreign court, and from the ambassador back to the prince.[6]

The theme of a ladder to heaven is often used by the Church Fathers. Irenaeus in the second century describes the Christian Church as the "ladder of ascent to God".[7]

In the third century, Origen[8] explains that there are two ladders in the life of a Christian, the ascetic ladder that the soul climbs on the earth, by way of—and resulting in—an increase in virtue, and the soul's travel after death, climbing up the heavens towards the light of God.

In the fourth century, Gregory of Nazianzus[9] speaks of ascending Jacob's Ladder by successive steps towards excellence, interpreting the ladder as an ascetic path, while Saint Gregory of Nyssa narrates[10] that Moses climbed on Jacob's Ladder to reach the heavens where he entered the tabernacle not made with hands, thus giving the Ladder a clear mystical meaning. The ascetic interpretation is found also in Saint John Chrysostom, who writes:

And so mounting as it were by steps, let us get to heaven by a Jacob’s ladder. For the ladder seems to me to signify in a riddle by that vision the gradual ascent by means of virtue, by which it is possible for us to ascend from earth to heaven, not using material steps, but improvement and correction of manners.[11]

Jacob's Ladder as an analogy for the spiritual ascetic of life enjoyed wide influence thanks to the classical work The Ladder of Divine Ascent by John Climacus.

Jacob's Ladder is depicted on the facade of Bath Abbey in England, with angels climbing up and down ladders on either side of the main window on the west front.

*Where’s the blue bird? / Why wasn’t he dressed as a blue bird?*

As I was surfing through Tumblr after the video dropped, I noticed some were asking, where’s the blue bird? Why wasn’t he dressed as a blue bird, why is he the yellow bird. And some confusion because he's singing about a blue bird but he's yellow. 

And I’m like exactly, and I’m like yes they’re catching on, because like we said he’s the yellow bird, he’s not fully free, he’s a performer, a singer, he can’t up and fly away. He’s stuck in this circus, practicing away. Not going back up that ladder. Who is this blue bird, talked about but not seen. Which leads to my next point.

*The missing presence / Make one's presence felt/heard/known*

There was a missing presence in the video, the blue bird, no where in sight but mentioned frequently. Felt in the area and in the lyrics. But where is said blue bird?

*The rainbow*

Somewhere over the rainbow, look at gifs two and four: https://www.tumblr.com/londonharry/723292594841501696/harry-styles-daylight-official-video?source=share

And heaven is somewhere over the rainbow.

Somewhere over the rainbow

Way up high

There's a land that I heard of

Once in a lullaby

Somewhere over the rainbow

Skies are blue

And the dreams that you dare to dream

Really do come true

Someday I'll wish upon a star

And wake up where the clouds are far behind me

Where troubles melt like lemon drops

Away above the chimney tops

That's where you'll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow

Bluebirds fly

Birds fly over the rainbow

Why then, oh, why can't I?

Somewhere over the rainbow

Bluebirds fly

Birds fly over the rainbow

Why then, oh, why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly

Beyond the rainbow

Why, oh why can't I?

*Harry on a horse / Tarot Symbolism*

So after the Celesine Venus and lyric matching and someone brought up on Tumblr the death card, I don’t have the link tho. But then cards started to pop into my head.

Death Card: Tho on the death card it’s normally a white horse and in the music video I can’t tell if the sun is rising or going down. I'm thinking its setting and its the golden hour.

Link: https://www.biddytarot.com/tarot-card-meanings/major-arcana/death/

The Death card shows the Messenger of Death – a skeleton dressed in black armor, riding a white horse. The skeleton represents the part of the body which survives long after life has left it; the armor symbolizes invincibility and that death will come no matter what. Its dark color is that of mourning and the mysterious, while the horse is the color of purity and acts as a symbol of strength and power. Death carries a black flag decorated with a white, five-petal rose, reflecting beauty, purification, and immortality and the number five representing change. Together, these symbols reveal that death isn’t just about life ending. Death is about endings and beginnings, birth and rebirth, change and transformation. There is beauty in death, and it is an inherent part of being alive.

A royal figure appears to be dead on the ground, while a young woman, child and bishop plead with the skeletal figure to spare them. But, as we all know, death spares no one.

In the background, a boat floats down the river, akin to the mythological boats escorting the dead to the afterlife. On the horizon, the sun sets between two towers (which also appear in The Moon Tarot card), in a sense dying each night and being reborn every morning.

NOTE: The Tarot card meaning description is based on the Rider Waite cards.

The Fool: When he’s walking on the tight rope, he throws his head up to the sky and makes this gesture and then falls and I instantly thought of the fool. Link: https://youtu.be/-UJCMfuFtSQ?t=163

I think that’s my favorite part in the video, falling into the unknown, the leap of faith, that hopefully something is down there to catch you. Very brave.

Link: https://www.biddytarot.com/tarot-card-meanings/major-arcana/fool/

THE FOOL DESCRIPTION

The Fool is numbered 0 – the number of unlimited potential – and so does not have a specific place in the sequence of the Tarot cards. The Fool can be placed either at the beginning of the Major Arcana or at the end. The Major Arcana is often considered The Fool’s journey through life and as such, he is ever present and therefore needs no number.

On The Fool Tarot card, a young man stands on the edge of a cliff, without a care in the world, as he sets out on a new adventure. He is gazing upwards toward the sky (and the Universe) and is seemingly unaware that he is about to skip off a precipice into the unknown. Over his shoulder rests a modest knapsack containing everything he needs – which isn’t much (let’s say he’s a minimalist). The white rose in his **left** hand represents his purity and innocence. And at his feet is a small white dog, representing loyalty and protection, that encourages him to charge forward and learn the lessons he came to learn. The mountains behind The Fool symbolize the challenges yet to come. They are forever present, but The Fool doesn’t care about them right now; he’s more focused on starting his expedition.

NOTE: The Tarot card meaning description is based on the Rider Waite cards.

*Height Themes*

Brining this back down from the bike section because its interesting, But in this music video he’s playing with heights, and trying to reach heights, and there’s a risk when you’re doing these stunts and trying to reach heights. If you fall you’re going to get hurt bad. 

*Breaking the 4th wall / Staring at the camera*

I have to go back and look at his other videos, only lights up comes to mind, but he’s making eye-contact a lot in this video. Which kind of breaks the story up a bit and makes it more immersive. But at the 2:35 mark really grabs my attention. 

*Also re enacting his childhood video?*

Someone posted this https://notoriousbeb.tumblr.com/post/723302511830843392/this-is-so-precious-i-may-vomit and I don’t know if its an actual video of him. But if so why is he reenacting this? Looking back at the past again? Where it all started?  

*Was Harry raised religious?*

I don’t want to pry into his life, but I’m curious because I feel like he throws a lot of religious symbolism and I feel like in past channeling he mentions religious things. But it's interesting.

———

Totally separate from the music video but it came to me last night.

Was it all a dream?

Let me throw this out there. I was thinking about the past few music videos and the album as a whole. And I wonder, when we think of Harry’s House, we think of the physical space. The physical symbols, you are home door etc. But what if he was inviting us all into his mind, into his dreams? And I saw some comments that his videos don’t make sense,. But when do our dreams and fantasies we have in our head make sense? It’s our brain trying to figure out the outside world or its spirit sending out symbols. 

And when you look through his music videos through that lens and looking at dream symbolism that’s when it gets interesting and more fun as well. 😜🧐

I'll throw in one dream symbol I was looking into, which was for the ladder: https://www.auntyflo.com/dream-dictionary/ladder

But it’s just a theory, a 🕵️‍♀️ theory.

—— 

Other interesting things I saw on Tumblr:

https://www.tumblr.com/haylorfan89/723353922505474048/i-found-sm-in-the-daylight-mv-it-looks-like-a 

https://www.tumblr.com/womanexile/723375221220966400?source=share

—— 

I have the week off from work and I have been resting and working on getting my energy back.

But I hope you and everyone enjoys the read and I hope it inspires others to look and think what it can all mean!

I’m off to play some video games and rest some more. Have a wonderful day, I'm excited for Saturday and to feel the energy.

with love,

🕵️‍♀️

My love, you’ve truly outdone yourself. I’m hella impressed. And I definitely made some connections reading through this! I’m gonna go through and comment.

when he sings reading your horoscope we see the Celesine and a woman in the background with a book which has a zodiac sign

When I saw it was Sagittarius I immediately thought about him being on the horse later so I wonder if that ties in. Sagittarius is known for being the sign of higher education, philosophy, and religion, and it rules travel. It makes me feels like the horse at the end may symbolize him either beginning this journey to higher understanding or highlighting that he reached the Sagittarius state, like he’s more self aware and educated and worldly.

I loved the last outfit, the skeleton one (Welcome to the Black Parade anyone?) this was designed by Steve O Smith

Yes! Omg I didn’t even see that. But what a great reference.

Lyrics that stick out from that song: He said, "Son, when you grow up, Would you be the savior of the broken, The beaten and the damned?"He said, "Will you defeat them? Your demons, and all the non-believers. The plans that they have made?"

Here’s this dress I mentioned for others to see.

This is interesting because I’ve said Harry is aware of his role in the bigger collective. He knows his mission and you bring up the latter as a bridge between heaven and earth. I think Harry may see himself as this in between too. Not saying he thinks he’s a god but he’s aware others think that. Celebrities are treated like modern day Demi-gods. Omg this connects to another poem I wrote!

Would you leave demigod status

For a day upon the earth

Would you descend mt. Olympus

To heal me of my curse

Maybe he’s descending Mt. Olympus to mingle with mortals. We’ve discussed the deep Greek mythology references and I mean he did play Eros.

Harry’s the only male and his place and role in the circus

I want to add that he’s the only male presenting one, I saw somewhere else that there are men in the video but they aren’t overtly masculine. It’s interesting because of the discussions around his gender, and sexuality.

I was thinking of the lyric “We don't really like what's on the news, but it's on all the time” and all the stuff that’s said

That’s an interesting connection to make! When the TV is off, you can more clearly see yourself. It almost becomes a mirror.

Now I’m randomly thinking of the Greek myth of narcissus (yes where the word narcissist comes from). Basically narcissus fell in love with his own reflection “shut your mouth, open your eyes and see, I’m still the only one who’s been in love with me.”

penny-farthings as "safety bicycles" because of the reduced danger of falling and

Interesting because I think there’s a theme of fear of falling, or falling in love as dangerous, but he mentions it in many songs, literally falling. I totally think he has intimacy issues which can make falling in love scary. I can’t reference all his lyrics but some of the leaked ones had lines like “I could never get sick of you, I just bit off more than I could chew” “who’s this man holding your hand” I think falling in love freaked him out.

The obsession of working with efficiency and assembly-line productivity ultimately drives the Tramp mad

I immediately thought of this lyric “Go home, get ahead, light-speed internet.” And “all we want is automatic all the time” and “tea with cyborgs.” Harry seems to reference dissatisfaction with our current society in some of his music and he seems to be commenting on humanity and it’s short comings.

Sad clown

Okay basically I was talking about how I think Harry sees himself as Pierrot and is always pining for his Columbine. The sad clown becomes friends with the moon. This character is supposed to be a comic relief character.

There’s also a famous song called Tears of a Clown, by Smokey Robinson

Furthermore, the sad clown is a trope in art and creates the Sad Clown paradox, which explores the link between depression and using humor as a coping mechanism.

https://medium.com/the-collector/interpreting-the-sad-clown-stańczyk-ffaff072e3d6

Vintage Circus

Okay! So I remembered after I posted my post yesterday about this tidbit I read at the Blues museum in St. Louis. It said that touring blues musicians started out touring with side show circuses as a way to reach people. We also see this in the Elvis movie, how Elvis started with touring with the local fair/circus. Many artists play fairs early in their career, specifically in the Country music field. Furthermore, the touring life is part of the circus as well as for Harry. There is a resonance there, it’s a similar lifestyle.

One of Harry’s signs is Libra and the symbol for Libra is the scales. The scales reveal Libra's need for justice, balance, harmony, and fair play.

Yes! I thought of this Libra connection as well. But also famine, when we think of famine we think of people who are hungry, he brings hunger. Think about the rabidity of his fan base. Starving for more always. Ties into music for a sushi restaurant video where he’s literally going to be devoured.

realism abandoned for political iconography: after this point the portraits become emblematic, capturing an ideal rather than a physical likeness

Yes! Isn’t that interesting because Harry in his career embodies an ideal. There’s commentary there about reality versus impression. And later you commented on how horses became obsolete and Harry discussed how Billie Eilish sort of helped him come to terms with his own obsoletion and how his fame and career may change when he stops being “it.”

Bluebird

I think we talked about bluebird symbolism and how it was used in Bukowski poem to represent this hope or this dream, creative outlet as this bluebird that he has caged inside. Miranda Lambert has a song called Bluebird too. I think it’s interesting because he’s saying he can’t be a bluebird. Presumably he can’t be a bluebird like his person. But also it’s kind of this heartbreaking experience right. Like I wish I could be what you need but I can’t. If I could, I’d give you the world but I can’t be. And a lot of relationships have this outcome where ultimately you realize you just can’t be what they want or need and that means you aren’t meant to be together. It’s one of the most heartbreaking moments ya know? Also blue represents sadness and yellow represents joy. I think in his growth he’s accepting he can’t go back, he can only be who he is now and he has to release the past.

Clouds

First, this video gives this vibe:

Isn’t it crazy how even back then he was leaving hints. I wonder how intentional or coincidental (synchronistic) it was.

Also I had this thought too, his head is literally in the clouds, an idiom that means like not being in touch with reality or like being a bit delusional, unrealistic. Head in the clouds made me think of Drake.

Was it all a dream?

In promotion of the album he said that he wanted people to feel a day in the life of him and his mind. So yes some of this may be more dreamlike or not seem logical because our minds aren’t always logical

**also to note. He released LNT music video on July 13 and this one on July 19. Just thought that was interesting to connect.**

Thanks so much to you for all your investigation. It took me multiple hours to respond and I’m sure it took you long as fuck to write this all out. We’re so happy you’re here, vesty nonnie. Love you!

[femvaylin]

Game time! It's been a couple of weeks, but thanks for tagging me @introversiontherapy

You are stuck in the elevator with:

1. The person on your lock screen or home screen.

2. The last song you listened to is playing on repeat.

3. And the last thing you ate and drank is the only food and drink you have with you.

How are you fairing during this?

My lock and home screen are literally just abstract pictures of flowers. So, I guess I'd be stuck in the elevator alone

I don't pay for sp*tify so I listen to music on shuffle only - my last song was Welcome the The Black Parade. I mean, I don't... Hate it? Depends on how long I'd be stuck

My only sources of sustenance would be blue cheese and white wine. Um, how long CAN I stay in the elevator?

Not tagging anybody but I promise I will next time? I really love being tagged and want to share the love.

[dollycas]

#FlashbackFriday - Saturday Edition - Midnight Spells Murder (A Happy Camper Mystery) by Mary Angela #Review / #Giveaway

Saturday Edition On Flashback Fridays I will share with you the books I was not able to review when they were first released that have been screaming at me from my To-Be-Read bookshelf. Midnight Spells Murder (A Happy Camper Mystery) Cozy Mystery 2nd in Series Setting - South Dakota Publisher ‏ : ‎ Lyrical Underground (July 13, 2021) Paperback ‏ : ‎ 206 pages ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1516110730 ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1516110735 Kindle ASIN ‏ : ‎ B08L8RJTTD Audiobook ASIN B0CYQWLJC2 Audio CD ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0CZ7LG59Y Spirit Canyon’s annual Spirit Spooktacular weekend is on, and for local amateur sleuth Zo Jones, it’s boomtime for business at her Happy Camper gift shop . . . until a murderer drops in for a browse. To celebrate Halloween at the Happy Camper, Zo schedules a talk by successful author and self-proclaimed witch Marianne Morgan. Although Marianne’s benign brand of witchcraft is more about feminine empowerment than black magic, her presence is still not welcomed by everyone. Then on a midnight stroll home, Zo spots what seems to be a new Halloween decoration propped up outside the Happy Camper. What she finds is not a mannequin but a dead Marianne, her lifeless body dressed in traditional witch’s garb. But why would someone send this good witch back to the spirit world permanently? Soon Zo realizes that plenty of folks have motives for murdering Marianne. What’s worse, nosy TV newsman Justin Castle plans to broadcast a report associating Marianne’s murder with the Happy Camper. Zo calls on her partner in sleuthing, local forest ranger Max Harrington, to help her find the culprit before Justin’s report airs. Otherwise Zo’s business just might go bust. But to catch this killer, Zo will have to risk much more than just her reputation . . . Dollycas's Thoughts Zo Jones owns the Happy Camper Gift Shop and she has special plans for Halloween and Spirit Canyon's annual Spirit Spooktacular. She has invited Marianne Morgan, a self-proclaimed witch and self-help author to give a talk and book signing. Her subject "Embracing Your Inner Witch" isn't about magic or spells but women reclaiming their power. The Spooktacular will also include a pumpkin carving contest, a parade, a costume party, and a Harvest Hike. Marianne's book talk goes well sans a couple of unwanted interruptions. Later Zo attends an event at her best friend Jules' Spirits & Spirits just down the street. As she heads home she notices a new life-sized witch propped up in front of the Happy Camper. Then she noticed the witch's shoes, she had seen them before. It was no Halloween decoration! It was Marianne Morgan dressed like a witch but she wouldn't be empowering any more women. Marianne was dead and Zo soon finds herself pressed to find her killer. Does she have a ghost of a chance? or will the killer send her to the great beyond? _____ Zo Jones is a strong protagonist. She is very likable and with her curious nature a good amateur sleuth. Her Maine Coon cat George is quite a cat. He goes on an adventure in this story which probably gave Zo some gray hairs. Her relationship with forest ranger Max continues to evolve. Zo has some great friends in Harley, Beth, and Jules. I enjoy how all the characters interact with each other. They all feel true to life. Ms. Angela plotted out a captivating murder mystery. With plenty of suspects and twists and turns it was fun to follow along with Zo. I especially liked the hints she received from a very unexpected source. I was surprised when the killer was revealed as was Zo. A piece of evidence was randomly found and then all the clues snapped into place. I loved the spooky takedown. Zo also has a personal mystery she is trying to solve and finds some major clues in this story to move that investigation forward. This intriguing subplot genuinely adds to each story. I am excited for the continuation. Midnight Spells Murder is a wonderful Halloween read. Ms. Angela sets the scenes well and brings her characters to life to solve a marvelous mystery. I am looking forward to reading Book 3 Mining for Murder soon. I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review. Thank you to Lyrical Underground and NetGalley for providing me with an ARC. Your Escape Into A Good Book Travel Agent   About the Author Mary Angela is the author of the Professor Prather academic mystery series, which has been called "enjoyable" and "clever" by Publishers Weekly. She is also the author of the Happy Camper Mystery Series. She is also an educator and has taught English and humanities at South Dakota's public and private universities for over ten years. When Mary isn't writing or teaching, she enjoys reading, traveling, and spending time with her family. Find out more about Mary Angela on her website here. Also written by Mary Angela This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase using my links, I will receive a small commission from the sale at no cost to you. Thank you for supporting Escape With Dollycas. I am giving away a Kindle Copy of Midnight Spells Murder! The contest is open to anyone over 18 years old. Duplicate entries will be deleted. Void where prohibited. You do not have to be a follower to enter but I hope you will find something you like here and become a follower. Followers Will Receive 2 Bonus Entries For Each Way They Follow. Plus 2 Bonus Entries For Following My Facebook Fan Page Pin this giveaway to Pinterest for 3 Bonus Entries. If you share the giveaway on Threads, X, or Facebook or anywhere you will receive 5 Bonus Entries For Each Link. The  Contest Will End November 2, 2024, at 11:59 PM CST The Winner Will Be Chosen Using Random.org The Winner Will Be Notified By Email and Will Be Posted Here In The Sidebar. Click Here For Entry Form Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. Receiving a complimentary copy in no way reflected my review of this book. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” “As an Amazon Associate, I earn a commission from qualifying purchases.” Read the full article