#sorry to those who I said “yeah nah I dont think I'd be into it”

[prettyflyshyguy]

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!!

More Supernatural - VG crossover bullshit. I have a fever. And the only prescription is more antagonizing. O'Byrne and Roy are from from an in-development story, Virtual Ground, and they are having a great time getting along with the Winchesters because Roy should be dead, and we don't talk about what's under O'Byrne's suspicious nicotine neck patch.

[saksukei]

wen junhui college au

other college aus; wonu minghao mingyu

you're damn right if you think that wen junhui is a theatre arts major because he iS and that too with humanistic studies as a minor aH and he's also on the rowing team,,, he started rowing as a joke and now he has one of the best times??? like. how.

and everybody knows he has too much energy and he uses it in the best way possible

like the plays? dude has a separate fanclub

you keep on seeing new tweets about “who’s the black haired guy in the play?” like wen junhui’s popularity is straight up no joke,, EVERYBODY KNOWS HIM

you on the other hand are an exercise physiology major with nutrition as a minor and you're also part of the rowing team,, and you have the best time for the women’s team,, which means,, you see junhui every other day,,

the coach pairs you guys often,, but there’s only one small issue,,,

YOU HATE WEN JUNHUI

he's such a pain in the ass,, he teases you every time he sees you,,, he always challenges your skills and makes you doubt yourself,, oh the amount of times you’ve wanted to deck him in the face,,

and today was the same as well

“you're not dead yet?” you hissed, as you saw jun approach you,,

“dont sound so disappointed, I might think you don't like me,” he retorted, a smug expression on his face, as he set his bag right beside yours.

“but I really don't like you,” you roll your eyes,,

jun chuckled, as he clapped his hands together, getting everyone's attention.

you guys were practicing indoors, on the rowing machine because there was some trouble with the equipment and the coach had to go get new stuff

which also meant he left jun in charge,, the teams assembled,, looking at junhui for directions,,

“alright everyone, warm up for ten and then start with a thousand metres,” he instructed. “and y/n, you're my partner.”

you rolled your eyes while everyone was whistling or smirking

it was no secret that you and jun didn't get along and he purposely tried to get on your nerves,,, heck everyone in the club said you two would fall in love at one point or another but you assured them by saying you'd rather choke

“your IQ is lower than room temperature junhui if you think that I want to train with you,” you hissed, as the two of you walked towards the machine.

“oh I'm sorry, I don't compare my intelligence quotient to someone who was deprived of oxygen when they were born,” he snapped, as he started warming up.

“you know what,” you spoke. “i'll just aggressively ignore your existence until you disappear.”

“maybe you should try doing it with that bird hair of yours, looks like worms will crawl out of it soon”

“why don't you look at your face first– ass clown?”

“why don't you look at your face first ass clown” he mimicked in a high pitched tone and all you wanted was to stab him there and then

“CAN YOU TWO SHUT UP WE'RE TRYING TO PRACTICE?” one of the team members yelled, causing you two to fall silent and warm up.

the next day,,, one of your best friends had begged you to go to her department because she had misplaced one of her things,, you only agreed on the basis that you'd be getting pizza

you were passing by the theatre to the class she told you to go to,, and you heard someone rehearsing their lines,, you went ahead to see who it was,,

of course it was jun with a script in his hands,,

and you don't know what it was,, but something just pulled you into the room,, maybe it was the way his words echoed of the walls,, the emotion in those alluring eyes of his,,

you actually sat down and listened to him instead of wanting to kill him,,, understanding what the hype was around him,,

like? you didn't even know this side of junhui existed??? excuse me? he was the biggest dick alive to you so you never really paid attention to anything nice that he did but this,,

you didn't even realize he had stopped until someone snapped you out of it

and you saw jun standing right in front of you

“well well well, it looks like I have a fan,” he smirked, folding his arms as he bent down to your level

“h-heck no,, I was just,,, looking for the um.....” you cursed your memory internally for forgetting.

“umm?” he teased,,

“shut up, I really was looking for something,” you snapped

“alright, alright” he surrenders,, raising his hands in defeat. “how was it though?” he asked.

“what?”

“the lines,, i'm sure you heard some of it.”

“they were um,,, good,” you reply,, shyly,, you've never been used to giving him compliments,,

jun nods as an awkward silence befalls the both of you,, you take it as a que to leave,, but then his voice stops you,,

“hey,, why don't you rehearse with me?” he suggested. “my actual partner is really busy and I need someone to rehearse with.”

“uh,, yeah sure?” you reply,,, as he hands you the script,,

jun started reciting his lines and you responded with the same enthusiasm

but the only thing that worried you was the last,, scene

in the script, it was written that jun's chracter would walk over to where you were, push your character against the wall and would try to initiate a kiss but your character would push him away

and so jun recited his last line, “i don't think I've ever tasted lips so fine, heck i'd taste them over and over again” he walked towards you, eventually pushing you against the wall

and your hEART WAS LIKE BADUMP!!

and his face was an inch from away from yours and you could feel his breath tickling your ear and you realized,,, how pretty wen junhui was,, how perfectly sculptured his face was,, those lips,, those cheekbones?? wait what??

and you were so mesmerized with how he acted on stage you didn't really realize you had to play a part as well

jun broke his stance, “you know you're supposed to push me away right?”

AND YOU BECAME RED

“y-yeah uh–but I–um remembered that I left the stove on!” you lied. “aND I DID SO BYE JUN!” you grabbed your bag and yEETED YOURSELF OUT OF THERE

and jun was confused but he ignored it and started rehearsing again

you on the other hand were trying to calm yourself like ???? It's just wen junhui? what the FUCK? Why is your heart racing so fast?? you were so confused? wHY? why is this happening

and the next time you saw him at training, oh dear god

“well if it isn't miss sunshine,” jun grinned.

“shut up jun, your existence makes me want to die,” you muttered,,, you felt your cheeks getting warm,,

“well, great, I think I'd be doing the world a favor.”

“jun if you're going to bother me one more time during practice I'm going to kick you so hard you will lose the ability to entertain a partner” you hissed, as you started warming up.

“nah,, you don't have the balls to do it,” he grinned, especially proud of the pun he used.

“you know what,,, I don't give a damn, so just leave me alone.”

“you give so many damns, they're visible from space,,,” he says,, his face is close to yours,, and you stop BREATHING

jun grins,, he thinks he has rendered you speechless,, as he goes up ahead to train with the boys,,

aND YOU FELT YOUR HEART WAS GOING TO JUST POP OUT OF YOUR CHEST

and now you were noticing all of these little things about him,, from his silly smile, to how he rolls his eyes, copies every small thing someone else does, to his goofy jokes, how his hair falls on his face, or just,,, him in general

all the while trying to keep your angry/annoyed facade so that he wouldn't pick up on it

but oh boy, it's wen junhui

and he notices every goddamn thing

including how much you've been staring at him especially in today's training session

he knew you were acting really weird since the rehearsal thingy but he was letting it slide because he thought you were upset or something and he didn't want to get on your nerves more

regardless, you decided to ignore jun from today onwards,, to stop feeling whatever you were feeling,,

and every thing was going great

you barely talked to him in rowing practice, you didn't attend the plays or even go anywhere near him

and jun,,,, he stopped annoying you as well

for two months

the whole damn university noticed but nobody dared to say anything ,,,,, in fear that you guys won't talk again

you were casually walking to the cafeteria and you heard something that just ,,,,, made your heart stop

“did you hear that jun got injured really badly? He was practicing in the theatre and this glass fell on his foot,,”

aND YOU DID A FULL 180 AND RAN AS FAST AS YOU COULD TO WHERE HE WAS

you had no idea why you suddenly cared so much like sure yeah, it was bad he got hurt but you were running so fast you felt your heart would pop out of your chest

the nurse eventually led you to where he was

and you saw his leg covered in bandages???

and your heart just broke

“hey what are you doing here?” jun asked. “i haven't seen you in like,,, two months?”

“jun I'm sorry–” you felt tears slide down your face. “i'm sorry I ignored you every time you tried to make a conversation with me or whatever I just,,, I had all these feelings that I couldn't figure out and I got scared–”

“hey hey hey, it's okay,” he cooed, as he opened his arms wide, only for them to wrap around you, as you cried in his chest. “no harm done, I promise.”

“no but jun– I was really inconsiderate and I just kept on feeling like I was missing something but I couldn't figure out what it was,” you cried out. “i felt ignoring you would be a solution but I just, I don't know?”

“hey, okay listen to me– what happened in these past two months happened–” he wiped the tears from your face. “but I hope you understand that the only reason I used to bother you a lot was because,, well,,, I really geniunely like you.”

“l-like me?” you stuttered.

“why do you think I annoy the crap out of you?”

“because you're an idiot, you like doing stuff like this,” you answered.

“but you're the only one I annoy?”

“okay that part I missed,” you give him a weak smile,, jun chuckles,, ruffling your hair,,

“in all seriousness though, I hated these two months. I felt like you were upset or something and I didn't want to risk hurting you even more so I stopped talking altogether because I thought you'd talk to me if I did,,” he admitted.

“its my fault this happened in the first place,” you responded. “and I now realize how stupid I am.”

“you're not stupid, you're just an ass clown,” he joked, a playful smile on his face.

“but i'm still sorry, junhui,” you sighed. “i really didn't want this to happen.”

“hey, it's okay– we both were right in our own places.”

“so um now what do we do?” you asked.

“well it depends,” he answered. “does someone want a cute, charming, handsome and brilliant boyfriend?” he grinned.

“only if he wants an amazing, beautiful, smart and talented girlfriend,” you answered.

“oh he sure as hell does,” jun grinned.

[popculturebuffet]

*Goofy and Launchpad are hanging a banner*

Banner: CONGRADULATIONS SENIOR WOODCHUCK VIOLET!

Huey: Excellent work guys.. and it only took three hours, four broken lamps.. several jabs in the eyes.. some bloodloss but you did it.

Dewey and Louie: (Walk in)

Louie: So what's all this?

Huey: A party for violet.. I thought she deserved a celebration.. I mean her parents took her out after but you can't get enough and I got one even though I turned it down because I did a terrible thing to try and get it.

Della: And i'm proud of you sweetie... (Has been there thewhole time with boyd, both in uniform)

Huey: I also thought I should bring some of our fellow woodchucks.. but most were small children and our house is a deathtrap on a normal day so for obvious reasons I invited the nigh indescrutable robot who my best friend can repair and my mom who lives here. I mean mom still counts. She's also going to try and start corunning meetings since .. how do I put this nicely.

Della: Launchpad your a terrible Chuckleader

Launchpad: Entirely accurate. And you look hot in that uniform

Della: Also entirely accurate. And while throwing a party for the person who defeated you in compettition isn't MY style, I prefer to sulk and swear vengance, I am PROUD of you for being the bigger duck. Metaphorically she's not a duck and her hair gives her a slight advantage.

Boyd: I"m just happy to be invited. As was my brother.

Louie: HUEY NO HUEY WHY HUEY WHY

Huey: "A woodchuck always invites another woodchuck"..though thankfully the guidebook also says "A woodchuck always obeys restraining orders" so the most he can do is creepily lurk outside.

Doofus:(Breathing heavily and creepily into the closest window from outside)

Louie: Eugh... but we're not going outside for this? Please say no.

Huey: We were but for obvious reasons I cancled the outside portion. I also laid out the solicitor traps with picutres of goldie so HOPEFULLy he'll evnetually end up in one of those. Your my brother, I take your eneimies as seriously as I do my oath as a junior woodchuck. Plus he scares me too.

BOYD: Oh he's not so bad. He stopped holding a knife to my throat while I was powered down after mama and poppa told him to only three times!

Webby: (Riding in on a cartload of snacks and books ) I got the suplies for your party! Almonds like she likes, some salmon and some light reading. You are such a good friend.

Louie: Sure that's ALLL he wants to be.

Huey: (panicked) yeah of COURSE I do... why would you say that?

Dewey: Ohhh Huey's got a girlfriend, huey's got a girlfriend, come on eveyrbody!

Dewey and Della: Huey's got a girlfriend, huey's got a girlfriend!

Boyd: HUEY"S GOT A PARTNER TO SHARE HIS HOPES AND DREAMS WITH MOCKING TONE

Dewey: Your learning buddy

Boyd: We have never met before.

Dewey: We haven't have we? ... why haven't we? I always wanted a robot buddy to laugh at my jokes and do wacky hyjinks with.

Boyd: And I always wanted a third friend!

Della: Sorry son force of habit.

Huey: I do not like violet.. just because she's pretty.. and smarter than me.. and she smells nice.. which I only know because she flew me out of danger after I didn't do the same in a moment of weakness... and she's also awwkawrd with people... and fine I do.

Webby: EHHHH MY BROTHER LIKES MY BEST FRIEND... I'M SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW. WE NEED A PLAN.

Huey: I have one it's called be nice and hope she notices.

Della: Oh baby child no. You have to actually make a move. Don't be like your uncle donald

Donald: (Burts in from the back) Stop telling the boys that! I mean it's probably true but it hurts.

Della: I was telling dewey to actually MAKE a move and not just wait for her to notice.

Donald: Oh... then your mother is absolutley right.

Huey: You taught me that!

Donald: And I was very wrong and i'm very much alone and i'll probably die alone aside from you guys. I'm okay with that.

Della: Okay i'm going to put a pin in that because your going to die alone over my dead body.

Donald: We talked scrooge out of us sharing a casket though.

Della: Again pin my baby needs me, Huey just be honest, be yourself... and just don't corner her.. just ask her nicely to go to a movie, or a library or an abandoned condo built on an native american buiral ground.

Webby: Thanks again for the date spot suggestion by the way. Lena loved it.

Della: your welcome. I have enoguh mom for all of you.. includingt he tiny robot and the grown man who misses his child.

Goofy: Awwww...

Louie: Wait why IS goofy here?

Donald: He's rooming with me. I still had the spare room and he has empty nest.. plus he needs a new house after the old one burned down.

Goofy: It's just like college!

Huey: But I"m.. scared okay? besides her being objectivley better than me, I had BOYD run the satstics.

BOYD: But your still great.

Huey: Thank you, what if she dosen't want that or dosen't feel that way?

Louie: Then you'll be awkard around each other for a while.. you were going to be ANYWAY if you don't tell her and either way the awkward goes away. You got this man. She's a nerd, your a nerd, your all nerds.

Launchpad: (Happily) hey!

Louie: You got this. We're all in your corner.

Doofus: (from outside still) Even me... though if you fail i'm going for that.

Webby: (cheerfully) If you even THINK about hitting on my best friend again I will hunt you down to the ends of the earth and bury you where no will ever find you.

Doofus: Ohhhh I won't.. your much more intresting.

Webby: Ewwwww.. I have a girlfriend. Also your objectivley disgusting in every way shape or form.

Doofus: Well I (gun cocks) Am being threatned by your help. Good day to you. (Runs off)

Louie: MRs. b, did you ever know that your my hero?

Beakly: (beams proudly and then goes back to her gardening)

Dewey: Louie's right, while I will mock you constnatly you got this. Plus you got her best friend in her corner.

Webby: Yeah.. though if you ever hurt her i'll do to you what i'll probably have to do to doofus one day

Huey: That is entirely fair and I will accept my death without a struggle.

Webby: See you are good boyfriend material!

Huey: Though I doubt I mean she couldn't possibly...

MEANWHILE: not far from the house, Lena and Violet are walking

Violet: Feel the same way. I mean... for one your around.

Lena: I appricate the compliment but i'm dating his sister. And i'm also VERY gay. Like our dad's gay. Like huey's mom is turbo bi.

Violet: Yes i've read the "Bi as explitive" t-shirt she wore when we first met her. But besides a lack of better options why me? I'm stilted, I do not get people, and until a few months ago my only friend was learning.

Lena: Take out stilted and you just described him too. Your similar enough to really click but just diffrent enough it won't get boring.

Violet: But you nad webby

Lena: Are opposites. Yes this is true. But it's not ALL relationships. Sometimes you date someone just like you, sometimes you don't.. I mean our dad's aren't exactly the same either, but their amazing. And so are you. I may not belivie in most people, But I belivie in you. (they arrive at the gates, violet has been in uniform naturally) Now get in there and get that nerd, Nerd.

Violet: (has been tearing up slightly and hugs her sister) You are the best sibling I never asked for.

Lena: (Hugs her back) right back atcha

(Inside)

Dewey: (holding a cake shaped like violet's head and eating it directly with his mouth) I got the cake

Huey: This isa why I set up a decoy.. three of htem.

(Della and launchpad are also holding hteir own cakes)

Della: But i'd never...

Huey: You would if this wasn't so important to me, so I feel your behavior deserves to be rewarded. Now if you'll excuse me I need to hide my emotions. (Waves hand over face.. and still looks like a nervous mess) There no one will notice

Louie: Huey she's a nerd not blind. Look man, your amazing, you are a catch.. I mean not at our age or even in highschool but eventually scrooge will die and you'll be richer because you'll probably invent something that makes you rich before that. As I said just go for it man, just find an opportunity and cease it.. we're all backing you up. And if it fails, we'll be there to pick you up. Now go get that nerd.

Huey: Right.. i'm just going to pen the door and

Duckworth: Masters violet and lena... (Leads them into the foyer) Also nicely done.. and thank you for asking my permission though in the future as long as your uncle is uninvolved you need only give me a heads up so he can hide from it.

Huey: Thank you duckworth.. ahme... ta-da!

Violet: (blushes) It's wonderful... and is that a bookshelf? And.. is that terry pratchetts complete works? And a cake shaped like my head.. may I?

Huey: (Hands her a knife)

Violet: (Cuts in) And it's an exact repleica of my interior cranimum. I knew you wanted those x-rays for a reason b esides curosity you rascal

Huey: (Blushes) I uh.. thanks

Violet: (Blushes bakc) Uh any time)

Della: Awwww

Huey: Hey violet I was uh wondering,, I uh..

Violet: ... okay so he does feel the same wya tha'ts a relief. You were right Lena

Huey: Wait what?

Louie: You had to give her the pep talk too huh?

Lena: Yup.. I mean she is usuually confident

Louie: Not so true here...

Dewey: I"m fine with that.. it's what makes him loveable.. that and it means i'm not 100% teh donald

Della: Nah you got too much of my genetics for that.

Huey: Okay I can handle this okay..

Violet: Oh god you really aren't intrested

Huey: No I am I am but why me? I"m not even a senior woodchuck.

Violet: no but when given the easy out you didn't take it, you took the honorable path. YOu also are smart, adorable, and do not mind the fact I speak more roboticaly than our actual robot friend.

BOYD: 4 friends!

Huey: An dyou.. dont' seem bothered that I kinda sorta a little am nervous.

Violet: If you mean extremley yes but I find it cute.

Huey: I.. uh (Blushes0 uhhhhh... youralsobrillantandcuteandIlikeyourhairandthewayyousmellandIknowthat'sweirdbutIwasupwindofyousoicouldn'thelpitandiwnattobeyourboyfriendeventually

Louie:Wow just.. wow.. I mean I expected it to be bad but that is art

Violet: I accept (Smooches his cheek) Now let's dig into my head shall we? I call frontal lobe

Lena: I want a large portion of skull

Webby: I get the eyes.

(The two nerds hold hands and head for the cake)

FIN

[punkscowardschampions]

Ronnie & Joe

Ronnie: where the fuck mckenna Joe: stuck at this thing Ronnie: like i fucking said Ronnie: where Joe: oh Joe: this kid from my course was doing open mic so we all had to show up Ronnie: youve done youre time then yeah Joe: overtime Joe: i wanna be home bad Ronnie: leave Ronnie: whats keeping you there Joe: them Joe: you know how people are Joe: buying me more drinks Ronnie: fuck em Ronnie: down whatever youre on & fuck off Joe: i will Joe: i am Joe: you picked up or am i Ronnie: its on you Ronnie: for the radio silence Joe: come on baby Joe: can't hear myself in here nevermind my phone Ronnie: not your fucking baby Joe: don't be like that Ronnie: i dont only exist when its quiet in your head Ronnie: thank fuck Joe: no one does then Joe: that's the whole point ain't it Ronnie: the point is where the fuck have you been Joe: i told you ron Joe: if i didnt have to i wouldn't be gone from you Ronnie: if you werent a pussy you wouldnt have to do fuck all Ronnie: grow a pair for christs sake Ronnie: baby is fucking right Joe: ive got to go out sometime Joe: if i didn't show to uni i couldn't afford half the shit we cop Ronnie: you aint at classes Ronnie: so unless some bitch off it is paying you to escort i call bullshit Joe: sadly not Joe: see if any of 'em are game maybe Ronnie: with 1 foot out the door Ronnie: you wish Ronnie: no fucking game when youre trying to play fuck all except cello Joe: 💘 for my cello skills Ronnie: youve got groupies Ronnie: go cry to em like Joe: you're sick of me, yeah Ronnie: work it out cunt Joe: we don't need to play games Ronnie: goin from baby to middle fucking aged aint cute Joe: you've got it covered for the both of us Ronnie: fuck you Joe: now I can't call you cute Ronnie: you cant call me old shithead Joe: i weren't idiot Joe: come on Joe: it'll all be good when i get there Ronnie: you come on Ronnie: I could be fucking dead Joe: you aren't Joe: don't say that Ronnie: no thanks to you Ronnie: or fucks given by you Joe: stop it Joe: you're the only person i care about Joe: literally Joe: not even myself Ronnie: & this is how you show it yeah Joe: i'm shit Joe: i know it but i never told you no different Ronnie: get another drink bought for you mckenna Ronnie: drown in it Joe: we got better plans Joe: and methods Ronnie: stop pissing about then Joe: will you be my baby again Ronnie: not that easy Joe: what if i get you something special Ronnie: do it & find out Ronnie: why the fuck would i commit to a yeah for a maybe Joe: 'cos you know i'm gonna Ronnie: your word is for shit Ronnie: i know that Joe: fine Joe: i'll stop talking Ronnie: promises promises baby Joe: 😶 Ronnie: left yet Joe: just me and my two feet Joe: no promises Ronnie: if you aint & youre silent on me to talk to some other bitch you wont be walking anywhere Ronnie: thats a fucking promise like Joe: if you were trying to get me to go faster Joe: why would i wanna talk to anyone else Ronnie: why else go out with those doss cunts Joe: part of it is keeping 'em thinking i'm normal Joe: can't just show up and nod out Ronnie: youre the only 1 with your ma on speed dial Ronnie: who fucking cares Joe: means i don't need to go back don't it Joe: or would you rather i was in dublin every other weekend Joe: i do what i gotta for a reason you know that Ronnie: theres fuck all need to have that many playmates Ronnie: if you planned that it was to piss me off Joe: i wouldn't need to plan that Ronnie: fuck you Joe: and i didn't Joe: they're boring Ronnie: 💔 Joe: i am Joe: i miss you Ronnie: you dont Joe: yeah i fucking do Ronnie: you fucking dont Joe: how do you want me to prove it Joe: tell me Ronnie: i aint spoonfeeding you ever day of your fucking life Ronnie: not that bitch Joe: you want it you ask for it Ronnie: you wanna prove yourself do it Joe: i will Ronnie: 💘 Ronnie: picked a boss day for romance Joe: have i Joe: i'm always romantic Ronnie: dont you know what day it is Joe: oh Joe: lol yeah Joe: i'll get you garage flowers instead Ronnie: fuck off Ronnie: theyll die quicker than you Joe: picky Joe: put the rig to another use after then Joe: 🥀 v classic Ronnie: ill carve it into my arm as you like it so much Ronnie: cheers for the easy design Joe: you could wait 'til I'm there Joe: so mean, baby Ronnie: course you wanna watch Ronnie: putting down the glass like Joe: if you don't know me by now Ronnie: so misunderstood yeah Joe: 💔 Joe: you wish Ronnie: yeah you know me proper well Joe: bollocks Ronnie: keep the sweet talk coming baby Joe: that's not what you like Joe: silence is golden Ronnie: you reckon you know what i like now Joe: yeah Ronnie: took you long enough Joe: you been waiting all your life yeah Ronnie: shut the fuck up Ronnie: puked enough today cheers Joe: see? s'your favourite Joe: can't get enough Ronnie: hating you fuels me Ronnie: aint denying it Joe: you're so welcome Ronnie: got that from your avoidance tactics Joe: i'll turn around then Joe: give you a real reason to live Ronnie: try it Ronnie: ill fucking kill you Joe: have to come find me first Ronnie: yeah & Joe: you threatening me with a good time ain't how this day is supposed to go Joe: know that much Ronnie: itll go however the fuck i say Joe: yeah? Ronnie: you know that much about me mckenna Joe: ain't denying nothing me Ronnie: too busy doing it round your besties Joe: 'cos i don't owe them shit Joe: only you get to know me like that Ronnie: you said you were killing the sweet talk Joe: it ain't its just how it is Joe: you know me Joe: no one else, end of Ronnie: come be with me then Joe: i am Joe: one stop but that'll be worth it Joe: come to mine and stay yeah Joe: don't wanna see the others Ronnie: ill be there before you Ronnie: few streets away Joe: good Joe: i like it when you're there Ronnie: want me to kick the door in so your flatmate girlfriend has a heart attack Joe: go on Joe: if she lives i'll say you forgot your keys Ronnie: ill say its your 💘 day pressie Ronnie: all for you baby Joe: if you're also in a mac, believable Joe: her boyfriend dumped her so she'll definitely be in Ronnie: tonights the night for that 3some Ronnie: hot Joe: only if you kill her first 😏 Ronnie: we need her tears for lube Ronnie: think it through like Joe: we've always got blood, baby Ronnie: keep it up & ill deffo stay Joe: forever Ronnie: ive been waiting all fucking day for you Joe: i'm sorry Joe: i'm making it up to you, alright Ronnie: i mean hurry up Joe: 🚖 it and everything Ronnie: your gf will be thrilled Ronnie: can hear her crying from here like Joe: maybe its the cat Joe: very similar Ronnie: watch your fucking mouth bitch Joe: 😂 Ronnie: 😾 Joe: you're both very cute Ronnie: say that again & well both fuck you up Joe: adorable Ronnie: 🖕 Joe: 👼 you Ronnie: you wish soft cunt Joe: nah Joe: but i'll survive Ronnie: you fucking wont Ronnie: i know you like Ronnie: & what you like Joe: 'cos its you Joe: all you Ronnie: ruined your gfs rom com Ronnie: shes gonna need some of whatever the fuck youre bringing Joe: too bad Joe: its for you Joe: i might have some benzos she can have though Ronnie: 💘 Ronnie: its wild being here when you aint & she is Joe: rude of her to have her drug-fuelled orgies when i ain't in Ronnie: party can really start now i am Ronnie: know shes dying to break the tension Ronnie: 👊💋 Joe: won't make you wait for me on that score, babe Ronnie: like you could Ronnie: bitch is ready to go Joe: you trying to make me jealous of sophie Ronnie: wouldnt use her Ronnie: fuck that Joe: awh Joe: 👼 Ronnie: you trying to say shes hot enough to bait you Ronnie: step your pussy up mckenna Joe: no Joe: i'm saying if you wanted to i would Joe: i'd obviously do anything for and with you Ronnie: we aint taking her virginity Ronnie: youre hard enough fucking work Joe: shut up 😏 Ronnie: make me baby Joe: that's part 2 of the plan Ronnie: you gonna talk me through it or you gonna do it Joe: i know what you like Joe: and how you feel about talking Joe: even if it ain't no empty words bullshit Ronnie: youve still got your tongue Ronnie: means i must wanna hear some shit youve got to say Joe: that means i can tell you all how you won't regret giving sid my tongue as a toy when it can be yours Ronnie: you wont regret leaving those cunts there & coming back to me Ronnie: [pics from his bed like hey it's me] Joe: i already knew that Joe: but keep reminding me whilst i wait for the man Ronnie: you gotta know it harder Joe: you'll know how hard i know it Joe: i'll make you feel it too Ronnie: you can keep you fingers unbroken too like Ronnie: typing that shit while we both wait Joe: don't reckon much to a dealer's idea of foreplay Joe: and i've waited too long for you already Ronnie: youve gotta bring it to em baby Ronnie: junkie law states it aint a real addiction til youve sucked a dick for it Ronnie: romance him Ronnie: [pics again like these will inspire you] Joe: fuck Joe: how 'bout I stay up here on my high horse and enjoy just being addicted to you then Ronnie: how bout you come the fuck home Ronnie: now Joe: yeah Joe: i gotta Joe: i need to see you right now Joe: i got what i really wanted we can top up later Ronnie: ill go out then Ronnie: they plug me faster than theyll do it for you Joe: can't blame 'em Ronnie: yeah you still smell like 🍒 Joe: and they know they ain't getting nothing sucked Ronnie: you could do a toe Ronnie: dont be a pussy Joe: 😂 Joe: i think they'd rather my money Joe: not cute like you Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: big cal is well into it Joe: tempting Ronnie: hell tell you how pretty you are Joe: just what i need Ronnie: yeah i know Joe: nah you know what i really am Joe: and that's what i want Ronnie: ive got eyes like Joe: me too Joe: even when they're half-shut or pinholed Ronnie: cute Joe: you Ronnie: dont Joe: why Ronnie: cause fucking dont Joe: alright Ronnie: fucks sake Joe: forget it Joe: i'm practically in the door Ronnie: make me

[cafephan]

hey hey hey if you're bored and have time i'd love to hear your favourite songs off of and/or an analysis of each of lm's albums. thanks

*cracks knuckles* this is gonna be a long ride, kiddos

DNA

Wings - forever one of my favourite lm songs ever, it just has such a beautiful message about self-love and realising other people’s opinions don’t define you, this song helped me a lot when i was younger

DNA - their vocals in this are unreal (especially the harmony/choir part) and the music video is one of my favourites, i just love everything about the song and the video

Change Your Life - like Wings, this song helped me a lot when i was younger, it too has a beautiful message just in a more stripped back beat than Wings, and i still listen to this song a lot because it usually always helps when i’m having a down day

Always Be Together - THE HARMONIES. the vocals are just beautiful in this song and it’s one of my favourites, i honestly will never understand why this song is so underrated, beautiful vocals and beautiful lyrics

Stereo Soldier - just a feelgood tune really, isn’t it, one of those songs that just makes you want to get up and dance, and i’ve had many a midnight dance party including this song

Pretend It’s OK - this song amazes me, the fact it was primarily written as a heartbreak song is one thing but the fact that it can be interpreted about literally anything astounds me?? like i don’t know many other songs that do that, and i will always applaud the girls for that. also knowing jade wrote her part about her grandad always gets me a little bit emotional myself

Turn Your Face - MY FAVOURITE ON THE ALBUM AND SO UNDERRATED. i think each and every one of the girls’ vocals shine, and this song is a prime example of why the world shouldn’t be sleeping on little mix, if you ask me. jade and leigh-anne’s solos in particular always stand out to me, but it is one of the most beautiful songs i have ever heard, much like Love Me or Leave Me, but we will get to that in a while. but yeah if you haven’t heard this song PLEASE DO.

We Are Who We Are - i bloody love this song, it too has helped me so much. it’s a song with a message of self-love, and realising society’s standards don’t define you and control you, none of us will ever look like the magazines want us to look (”throw away the books and the magazines, i’m never gonna look like a beauty queen”) and ah i just love it

How Ya Doin’? - this song always makes me feel really sassy when i sing it and i’m glad it’s a feeling that’s carried through the five years since the first time i listened to the album, it’s a prime singing-into-your-hairbrush-in-front-of-the-mirror song! plus it’s just a bop isn’t it tbh

Red Planet - at first i didn’t really get this song, but after a few listens i absolutely fell in love with it and the vocals continue to astound me

Going Nowhere - I. ADORE. THIS. SONG. it’s so sassy and so fun to dance around your room singing (trust me) and it gets out all the frustration towards a partner i’ve never had. their vocals are just so strong and the harmonies floor me. plus jesy’s beatboxing and leigh-anne’s rapping are so underrated give the girls credit i’m begging you

Madhouse - i’ve had a concept for a music video for this since the first time i heard it but because they never released it as a single it’s sad i’ll never see it, just listen to it and i think you’ll immediately get a music vid concept too. but apart from that, it’s just a cool song with a nice beat and its fun to try and match their voices (and in my case, fail every time)

Make You Believe: A BEAUTIFUL SONG. the vocals are just unreal and i love it a lot

Love Drunk: i will never understand why this song didn’t make it on the standard edition of the album because it’s a good’un

Case Closed: i love this song so much ah tbh i dont know why all three didn’t make it onto the standard edition of the album they’re all worthy

favourites from the album: Always Be Together, Turn Your Face

Salute

Salute - the female empowerment song we all needed, and still as relevant today as it always has been. i don’t really need to say much about this, but i adore it and will always be a staple of pretty much any playlist i make

Move - this is one of those songs that i always try to match their vocals on (and fail). it’s just a song that i can’t help but sing along to, it’s so catchy and they sound so good and the music video is SO GOOD and have i mentioned i love it because i really do (plus who remembers when my blog title was jade’s solo)

Little Me - the song we’ve all needed to hear at some point or another. for me personally it’s more relevant than ever, i always want to go back in time and tell kirsten who was being bullied all of the things in the song. plus the unplugged version is beyond gorgeous (”you’ve got a lot of time to act your age, you can’t write a book from a single page” is such an underrated lyric imo)

Nothing Feels Like You - just watch this live performance. i need say no more.

Towers - the lyrics are just so good?? and the vocals are just so beautiful??? i feel like jesy’s vocals in particular shine on this song and she owns it. “sorry heart, i’m sorry heart but we’ll have to start again” makes me sad every single time i don’t know why, but it’s just the sign of a good song AND THIS IS AN EXCEPTIONAL SONG.

About The Boy - just watch this live performance. i need say no more, but just prepare yourself ok you’re welcome

Boy - SO. UNDERRATED. this song is mainly acapella minus drums, and people have never really spoken about it??? like they literally make up this song entirely with vocals??? solos, harmonies and backing alike??? p l e a s e listen to this song to get it some of the recognition it truly deserves i can’t sing its praises enough. WATCH THE LIVE PERFORMANCE AND FALL IN LOVE.

Good Enough - another of those songs that can be interpreted in more ways than just a heartbreak song. as the girls say in the salute album livestream, it can be read as feeling insignificant to a sibling or not good enough for your parents or friends, and it’s just a song we all need to listen to because we’ve all been in that position at some point (or in my case, very often) and it just needs more hype over it because it’s beautiful and the vocals are showcased beautiful and needs more love

Mr Loverboy - i love the subtle r&b influence on this song (even though so many people hate it) and it’s a song i can’t help but sing along to whenever it comes on shuffle, it’s just an easy listening song for me i love itttt

A Different Beat - a feelgood song that always gets the ol’ feet tapping. a wholesome message surrounded by an upbeat track and it’s a good all-rounder

favourite songs from the album: Move, Towers, Boy, Good Enough

Get Weird

Black Magic - the one that everyone knows, a song that you can’t help but sing along to, and catchy as hell. i’ve seen so many people say this song is their guilty pleasure which i always fnd really funny idk why. watch this acoustic version to fall in love yeah okay cool

Love Me Like You - another foot tapper and a v good all-rounder. also the music video is great (so much so i wrote a videofic on it lmao) i like it a lotttt

Weird People - this is a song that i feel represents me emotionally. every time i listen to it i can’t help but think back to tour when they just parade around the stage in ridiculous outfits and accessories and it was the best night ever i adore this song and i adore the girls

Hair - if you’ve not sung this into your hairbrush at least once i want you to stop lying to yourself. it’s such a bop!!!! i much prefer the original, it must be said, but i love the music video, it’s so fun and poppy and i think they did a great job (i’d say relatable but who am i kidding i don’t have friends to have sleepovers with) it’s also catchy as all hell it’s never just in my head for a few hours, it’s in there for days at least

Grown - I LOVE THIS SONG. realising you’re too good for someone who wouldn’t look twice at you in the past but now you’re going places they’re coming out of the woodwork? nah thanks kick ‘em to the curb. I LOVE IT IT’S SO GOOD I ADORE THIS SONG. plus in case you were wondering, it’s insane performed live, trust me. just really listen to the lyrics, they’re stellar

I Love You - SO. UNDERRATED. the lyrics are beautiful, the vocals are exceptional (jade steals the show for me with this song tho it has to be said) and where is this song’s recognition?? where the hell is it??? (”even if the tears fall and my heart hates me, baby i love you” // “and it doesn’t matter what no-one says, even if it’s broken, i love you anyway” // “even if these three words choke and take me, baby i love you” // “there’s nothing left but these i love yous” THIS SONG IS SO RAW AND FROM THE HEART IT MAKES ME FEEL HEARTBREAK AND I’VE NEVER EXPERIENCED HEARTBREAK

OMG - this. is. leigh-anne’s. song. she absolutely owns it and the song is such a bop and so sassy and makes me feel like i’m appealing to people which is always a winner. it’s such a good one to sing at the top of your lungs, trust me. try it.

Lightning - perrie’s vocals in this song, did you mean my death??? the girl puts her lungs to good use. if you’ve heard the song before you know which part im talking about when i say wow. the fact they can perform it live sometimes even better than the studio version is still unreal. i just love this song and i love the girls

A.D.I.D.A.S - this song is one of my all time favourites, i just love it so fucking much. it’s so cheeky and fun and my love for it just never ends. i like that they spoke about the topic of sex like this, in a nice and breezy, fun way, a lot of bands don’t do that. plus leigh-anne’s solo? end me. “slaving in the kitchen, iced you a cake, and i served you a plate, but boy that ain’t what you ate” is one of the most iconic lines in music history don’t argue with me 

Love Me or Leave Me - ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SONGS EVER MADE (as i briefly spoke about in Turn Your Face) i will forever be sad that this was never a single and they never performed it live, not on tour or in interviews. all four of their voices shine on this song and their solos are all exceptional. it’s one of those songs that always makes me emotional. listen to it with headphones on in a silent room and really listen to the lyrics. i can’t even choose one in particular because there are so many that make me an absolute wreck. prepare for emotions to hit you like a ton of bricks. 

The End - MY. ACAPELLA. GODDESSES. 2 minutes of heavenly vocals. enough said.

I Won’t - i adore the message of this song. love yourself, you are enough as you are. listen to this if you need a pick-me-up, because it’ll work, i’m sure (”nothing good comes easy, if it did i wouldn’t be me” is literally the lyric that defines my life)

Secret Love Song, Pt. II - i’ve spoken about this song so much on this blog but it’s genuinely one of my favourite ever songs in the history of music, i just adore everything about it. (i didn’t list the version with jason bc he just ruins it #opinion) the lyrics, the fact they wrote it for their lgbtq+ fans, the vocals, everything about this song is beautiful and i will continue to scream its praises until i’m old and grey. this song is so important and dreamy and i just can never stop raving about it.

Clued Up - this song is so important and more people should know about it. the fact it’s acoustic makes me love it even more, it’s so stripped back and the fact it’s not layered with an intense upbeat backing track really highlights their vocals and the message of the song, and i just love everything about it. each and every one of them gets a chance to showcase their voice and they all do it flawlessly, i just think more people should know about this song. also try telling me this song isn’t the very definition of the journey that dan has been on over the years because it is

The Beginning - MY. ACAPELLA. GODDESSES. AGAIN. 1 and a half minutes of dreaminess and bliss , the vocals are unreal and the fact there is literally no music at all, is a prime example of why little mix need more recognition

favourites from the album: I Love You, A.D.I.D.A.S, Love Me or Leave Me, Secret Love Song pt. II

Glory Days

Shout Out To My Ex - this, my friends, is how you do a heartbreak song, let ‘em know what they’re missing out on now! i love how upbeat this is and how it’s not dwelling on the past, and the music video is so fun and shows off their friendship so well and i just love it

Touch - a fun little song with a fun beat, if you’ve not had a dance to this song i don’t know what to say to you

F.U - ONE OF MY FAVOURITE SONGS EVER. i adore the motown vibe, all four of their vocals are showcased so well (especially perrie), and the lyrics are so sassy and i still have a music video concept in mind though whether or not they’ll ever release it and i’ll see if im right or not, we’ll never know. definitely listen to this song, it’s one of my favourite songs lm have ever doe

Oops - i adore every little thing about this song. their voices and charlie’s work together really well (and that live performance on the x factor floored me) and it’s a fun song and an exceptional all-rounder, if you ask me. realising you’re still feeling things for someone you once had a thing with and eventually realising they feel the same, what’s not to love? (plus the beat is amazing)

You Gotta Not - the lyrics are absolutely savage but the girls deliver them flawlessly (perrie steals the show for this song imo) and honestly rip whoever meghan trainor thought about whilst writing it 

Down & Dirty - literally the epitome of a club banger. if you dont have an overwhelming urge to dance when the beat drops then you and i have nothing to say to each other (”we international divas, but i started out making your pizzas” TELL THEM HOW IT IS LEIGH-ANNE i love this line it’s so iconic)

Power - i. love. this. song. girls dominate in more ways than one amirite (a proper bop though, jesy’s solo forever remains a highlight)

Your Love - i could literally ramble on about my love for this song for at least four days. it’s so adorable and the vocals are outstanding (especially leigh-anne) and it makes me celebrate a relationship i don’t have and makes my heart warm, though maybe thats because i am a hopeless romantic and this song is the anthem for hopeless romantics. all in all, LOVE.

Nobody Like You - what. a. beautiful. heartbreaking. ballad. each of their solos is beautiful and breathtaking, and this song is guaranteed to make you feel things. it’s so raw and you can hear the emotion in their voices and it just adds so much to an already beautiful song. i cant recommend this song enough. must listen.

No More Sad Songs - an iconic heartbreak song. my initial thought on what the music vid would be was nothing like what the official vid is, and i actually started a songfic for it but it ended up going where i didn’t want it to so i scrapped it BUT i love this song dearly, turning something sad into something fun and positive, always a fan. 

Private Show - i love how cheeky this song is, and i love the choice of lyrics. it’s a proper bop and i love it, it’s one of those songs i can’t not sing along to whenever it comes on. their vocals are also on point and i can never match them despite how hard i try

Nothing Else Matters - this song is so precious. jade’s vocals steal it for me, it must be said, but the chorus harmonies are to die for. i love the lyrics and how down to earth this song is, and it’s no wonder that it’s one of the girls’ favourites (most of all jade’s)

Beep Beep - i will genuinely never know why i adore this song so much, but i just do. i love everything about it. it’s so fun and cheeky and poppy, and their vocals are fire as usual, i just can’t recommend it enough. one of my favourites by far!

Freak - i love jesy’s voice in this song, and how overall the song is slightly urban and a bit grunge, i really love those influences. and if you don’t sing along with at least the chorus then i admire your willpower i really do. i love the lyrics and how they tell a clear narrative and i just love it in its entirety. sold song, more than solid vocals.

favourites from the album: F.U, Oops, Your Love, Nobody Like You, Beep Beep

this was a journey and has taken nearly three hours to write, so thank you for reading if anyone has read this far, this was fun :’)

[winds--of--change]

No.491

It's WED 19/04/2017 at 1057 PM

Me: hey, do you know why some people are even afraid of getting happiness?

Markus: Nope, why?

Me: people like Sunny, for example, who I am sure she could be happy as fuck, but as she said, she doesn't want to find a nice guy because she would feel boring and she would soon fuck it up but deep down i'm sure she wants a nice guy, like her

Markus: I don't remember her saying that, but sounds like she's afraid that she can't find one and says that as reassurance for herself

Me: sorry for randomness, i'm drinking alone and bit drunk lol thats why i can text so randomly to people like this

usually i just write it on my blog and feel better after that

i guess no one ever, including me wants to be alone

Markus: No worries

Me: i dont think i want to be alone like i thought i can

weird i thought i can always be by myself before man i want to cry i thought i just want to be happy to

Markus: Yeah, I know what you mean, I don't want to be alone, but I won't be with someone just because I don't want to be alone

Me: but somehow i just chose things that arent happy for me

exactly! thats why im always alone because id rather be alone than being with someone i cant even stand just because i dont want to be alone but somehow sometimes thats still so hard lol

maybe sometimes we actually never know what we want

but only know what we dont want. i dont know anymore

i just want to cry. and i did lol im crying, i dont even know why i cry

Markus: Yeah probably, the search for happiness is hard, but if it just came as soon as we wanted it, would you really be happy, or just content

Me: no actually i know i am prob a bit like sunny, i dont want to be happy because im afraid i would fuck it up so i'd rather choose something unhappy and so at least in the end, there wouldbe no devastating disapointment if nothing good comes out of it because after all i'm not afraid to lose it

Markus: I don't know, I don't think that anyone does that on purpose

Me: I know. i dont do that on purpose. somehow it just happens. i dont know what i saying or thinking anymore lol

Markus: I think it's a subliminal thing we do to not have to experience loss, because you can't lose what you never had, but you still want something so you are sad about that instead

Better to just search from the beginning then and face the pain when it arrives

Me: why am i crying? isnt it because it's really unhappy, then why cant i stop the unhappy thing? why i still do it. maybe it also all comes down to the fact that sometimes somehow we do not love ourselves enough to think we deserve happiness.

i dont know what i did wrong anymore. i just want to be with him, then after being with him, i went home, being alone like this, and cry. then what do i really want, a happiness with him, but im not even thinking about the possibility of this

and i know i should stop, but i just continue on, i want to touch him, but after doing so, i actually felt empty more

Markus: Then maybe you are sad because you know you will never be and are trying to make sense out of it while sometimes there is no sense

Me: i dont think i love him that much, but at the same time, i dont know what this is, maybe its just because he's my first and i felt attracted to him physically, even though physcally i don't think we match

Markus: It's hard to face life sometimes, especially when you like someone, but sometimes you just have to say fuck it, it's life

Me: maybe im just alone for so long i need something to spice it up i know i just need to fuck it and go with the flow

Markus: Yeah I know what you mean, it's hard being alone 😞

Me: but i dont know how i can just forget things, i am alone all the time but now somehow i cant be alone that easy any longer, and that scares me, because how can i face things ahead if i cant be alone that easy anymore, i used to be so numb, as im alone all the time, so it doesnt feel anything, but then i got to have chance to be with someone with friends i really love, and after that suddenly comparing to loneliness before, its a complete difference and i prefer being with someone like those people i was lucky to meet and be with, but in life its not easy to keep meeting those kind of people

and besides, i know that even though i can find a group of people who can accomodate me, i will somehow fuck it up, maybe im not just that good at socializing, or knowing how to be with someone, the fact that i drank alone, crying and ranting all bullshit like this lol after meeting him, is obviously to show that i shoulnd't be with him, but at the same time i chose to be with him because i dont believe in love i dont believe in romance i dont believe in forever happiness either, i dont believe in anything but myself, thats why i chose this experience so that i can get out of the traditional girl self who dreams of a happy ending, or a true love and blah blah blah shits, sorry why the hell did i msg you all this, lol i just want to live so that i could die, life is so long, too long we just have to keep thinking, no man, i should fucking get a job lol im kinda at liminal stage in-between thing, after graduation, before job thing, middle of nowhere, not quite here, not even there, and afraid to moving there because i dont know what is good for me 😭 man fuck me lol i should just........ sorry i dont even know why i text all this, actually the only one i can think of to talk to is sunny then im afraid i give her a burden again, so i ended up finding someone else which is you to rant on. i dont like myself who cant deal with my own shits alone, i forget how to deal with shits alone all by myself and thats so annoying lol its so annoying to be dependable on people, thanks for taking this lol good night ❤

Markus: It's OK, I was just making my dinner, yeah I understand what you mean, I also have a lot of problem finding people I can trust, especially people I can open up to, but I think that it's important not to give up, otherwise you don't know what you are missing!

And the job thing isn't easy either, I was lucky, I just happened to choose the education that would benefit me the most, but I have no idea what I want to do with my life, I think it all comes down to you live you learn

Me: you are lucky yoooooo!!!! and im sure you deserve being lucky because you will make the best of it, many take things for granted and dont do best they could but you will. i will be fine. thank you Markus 🙂 i will be fine. everything works out in the end. always. and you are a good cook! i wanna eat your cake again XD thanks to you i will defo come visit sweden one day! not like i think of anything to visit there lol except for...erm...abba museum or something? lol but yeah now i have you there i believe i could explore sweden as local

haha

Markus: Haha thank you I think you will be fine too 🙂 there are many things to do! If it's the summer you can do all kinds of things!

Me: yea i'm going home for a while anyway. i will bring back some vietnamese coffee for you!!! you must have some, i insist lol

Markus: Sounds great! I love coffee 🙂 At least good coffee 😛

Me: vietnamese coffeee is the bessttttt, approved by french ie victor and canadian ie sunny and. me lol and ..all over the world lol

Markus: Haha looking forward to it 🙂

Me: and, you hav to 'like' my new profile pic XP lmao

Markus: Lol, how drunk are you?

Me: i dont know lol i knocked the whole bottle so far lol

but i think i'm still at happy drunk, ok no i'm crying while laughing lol but well it's still good drunk lmao

Markus: Haha lol, just be careful so you don't fall over and hurt yourself 😛

Me: nah im just at home drinking and writing ill be fine lol

but seriously you MUST like my new profile picccc!!!!

please, boost my ego and let my vanity go viral for a little bit haha i'm counting on your like lmao 😜

Markus: OK, I'm going to sleep, nighty night 🙂

Me: lmao hai thanks for listening good night

Markus: No worries

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: I have THE most shockingly incredible news Carly: ? Ali: Someone you know Ali: someone very geographically close to you Ali: is leading a double-life Carly: I know my ma's fucking the bloke who works in the kebab place Ali: Hmm Ali: fair play Ali: a man who knows his way around a giant sword of meat is undoubtedly a plus Ali: but this is not about kebabs or adultery Ali: yet Carly: thats what i said after i told her what pegging is Carly: but k is it about 💊s? Ali: bless Ali: from the mouth of a babe Ali: nope, but think one of your other great loves Carly: aw its about you Carly: tell me tell me Ali: okay, okay Ali: but only 'cos you're the sweetest Ali: and I am 😻 Ali: cat lady has an antique shop! Ali: idk how I've not found it 'til now but it's so cool and you've got to come Carly: o thats so cute! Carly: all the 🐈s just on the shelves like 👀 Carly: she must have so many breakages tho 💔😿 Carly: u there now? Ali: RIGHT?! Ali: I nearly gave her a heart attack when I realised it was her Ali: like seeing a 🐅 in its natural habitat Ali: [imagine a hilarious selfie with a slightly bewildered old lady 'cos she's #buzzin] Ali: won't blame her beloved moggies but it is a bit of a mess Ali: party still tho, so come thru Carly: 😍😍😍 Carly: wtf @ her working there still shes like 400 Carly: not looking it from that angle tho 😘 Carly: where am i goin? Ali: she's the big boss lady Ali: 🤑🤑🤑 Ali: 'cept not, obvs Ali: it's a complete hidden 💎 Ali: hidden the operative, so just get to the main drag of the high street and I'll meet you 💚 Carly: yea?! aw love that for her & us Carly: scavenger hunts r so fun bye ma👋 Carly: ill bring mr darcy he's been trying to get in the hot tub all morning 😼 didnt have the 💜 to tell him hes not meant to like water Ali: exactly Ali: knew you'd get it Ali: won't blindfold you or nothing but maybe later Ali: awh, double date moment Ali: he's just tryna live up to his name is all Carly: 🔮 finds u baby or u find it Carly: ha ill make that maybe into a yea thats my 🔮 Carly: 💙🐅 & 💜🐈 aw cute Carly: thats why he's 😾 but 😽 yea? thats the 1 right? Ali: got it all in one, baby Ali: so smart Carly: my outfit choice gotta b some kind of 🔮 too 🌟 Carly: fate found me overalls like get ready bitch Carly: 🐇 Ali: ready to work and werk Ali: that's my girl Carly: ha Carly: can't have u looking like that & me Carly: idk but not 👼 level Ali: psh Ali: impossible Carly: ur a 🍑 Carly: but we're still honeymooning Ali: life's a honeymoon with you and me, doll Ali: neverending summer, yeah Carly: u kno Carly: any hot customers that come through the door better only have 👀 for the other 🐈 Ali: 🐈 gets 'em in the door, they gotta stay, and more importantly pay, for the bargains Ali: that's my business plan anyway Ali: not sure how she's rolling, only that she ain't rocking Carly: & no more breakages thats mine ha Carly: dont have the shakes today its k but will be weak at the knees when i see u 💙 sorry colleen Carly: make sure u catch me yea 👼 Ali: 'course Ali: you're far too pure to ever be a 😈 Ali: the universe and I will never let that happen Carly: ur too nice Ali: nah Ali: just what you deserve Ali: well, I try Carly: ur the real 💎 Carly: & im happy we found each other Ali: me too Ali: never gonna lose each other again Ali: trust Carly: the universe & i will never let that happen Ali: 💚 Ali: forever means forever Ali: do you want anything, I'm just killing time Carly: im goin nowhere baby unless its w you 💫 Carly: idk water maybe Carly: not v rock & roll but i reckon maybe youll like me anyway Ali: adventures only club 🌌 Ali: I know I'll love you dope Ali: water it is Ali: strictly straight-laced plain ole h2o, no hint of party Carly: 💙forever i kno Carly: ha wot r u planning to spike it w? 👀 u Ali: WISH I'd found some really retro pharmaceuticals in all those old bottles Ali: wonder how coke ages like Ali: fancy Carly: if we find any i'll be your lab 🐇 Carly: but not today im 😵 Carly: 💔😢 Ali: 😢 now I'm thinking about animal testing Ali: no cages either Ali: we got work to do Ali: but you can take it easy babe, sweet-talk like only you can Carly: omg no 😭 we have to free every 1 🐇🐀🐁 no cages ever! 😠 Ali: that's a job for tomorrow Ali: we'll need posterpaint and balaclavas Carly: cute Carly: i kno lads who've got some we can borrow Carly: & 💪 if we need it too Carly: or 🏎 for the getaway ha Ali: they've got their uses Ali: that's for sure Ali: can we convince 'em to dress up like 🦍s for the cause Ali: obvs 😘 Carly: i can Carly: u could but id b 💔😢 like Ali: but what about my 💔? 😏 Carly: ur protected by the 🔮💫 Ali: yeah Ali: and I protect you Carly: yea u do Carly: we dont need the lads Carly: ur a🐅 Ali: 😊 Ali: what's going on at the zoo tonight tho Ali: any parties we need to be a part of Carly: johnnos home thats always good til the garda wanna welcome him back too ha Ali: party poopers Ali: we'll be gone before then Carly: gone 🏃 or gone 🚀💊 Ali: little from column a little from column b Ali: don't wanna share you for that long Ali: and I'm defs not sharing our spoils, either Carly: k Carly: i kno u said this place was hard to find but maybe im outside? Carly: idk it 👀s right Ali: omg 🗺📌 Ali: I'm still in the tescos getting us some lunch Ali: called Calico Jacks Ali: which is SO perfect Carly: !!! Carly: i knew this was the place 🐈👑🏰 Ali: the universe WANTED us both to find it today Carly: omg its so cute in here Carly: idc that im sneezing Carly: i love it Ali: right? Ali: she has some amazing stuff Ali: it just needs sorting out so people can 👀 it all for what it could be, not necessarily what it is rn Ali: once we've bagsied the best bits for ourselves, naturally Carly: i'll tell her its the comedown so she wont feel bad Carly: omg i just found the cutest 🐻😍😍 hes joining us for tea Ali: totally making this a picnic moment Ali: you've gotta name him/her Carly: yay Carly: kettles on baby 💙 r u nearly here? Carly: mayb ill have thought of a name by then Carly: cant rush if he has to go by it forever Ali: faster than you can sneeze boo Ali: exactly, names are very important Ali: so 🍀 he gets to pick his own Carly: aw lucky is a good name Ali: perfect Ali: I wonder if we can find him a suitable tea time outfit Carly: 😊😊

[punkscowardschampions]

Billie & Indie

Billie: Indie! Pabs made frango a passarinho, you want in? Billie: also he said he saw you out at that boy in his year's party on Saturday Billie: you must not have seen him Billie: I got lunchtime detention for all the notes I was trying is pass you in Maths! Billie: Too busy 💤 or doodling, that is the question Indie: spitting dem bars all the way to my 💘 but nah itd be a mad treck from where i @ Indie: lo must have it twisted cos i aint rolling w dem younger rudeboys at no gatherings Indie: my bad tho Indie: too sleepy innit Indie: olders got partys for me to hit up standard Billie: where are you laying your head these days my dear? Billie: aside from your desk, naturally 😋 Indie: 😂😂 Indie: getting the zzzs i need there like Indie: wen im in im out for the count Billie: but what about all the times you're not in 🤔 Indie: in endz Indie: rollin w my boyz or my BOY you know Indie: its chill Billie: what does rolling entail exactly Billie: i'm unfamiliar Indie: 😂😂😂 Indie: rolling up 🚬 standard but can be any thing Indie: hangin, chillin reh teh teh Indie: it be what it be, bills Indie: 🚀🚀🚀 tho Billie: I still feel like those are all just different words for the same thing Billie: which still eludes me but I'm glad you're having fun! Billie: We miss you though, don't you have any time to spare, pleaaaaaaaaaaaase Indie: what you need im here rn Indie: hit me w it Billie: I don't need anything, just want your company silly Indie: you got it Indie: we chatting Billie: Yes, of course Billie: but in person too, yes? Billie: It's not the same without you Indie: what you trying to see my face for? Indie: its still this Indie: [sends selfie] Billie: 😂 Billie: [sends back suitably silly selfie of own] Indie: living for it baby Indie: you looking 🔥 Billie: Thank you Billie: Now I got all the pink out Billie: surprisingly stubborn stuff Indie: mine got dashed mad fast Indie: must be dem curls holdin Billie: Yeah and mine isn't even as textured as some of the others Billie: thank god Ri didn't do it too Indie: she aint as extra as how we is Indie: blessed that i aint blood of ya cos my mans werent feelin the look Indie: hed be proper vexed if it stayed Billie: os homens não sabem nada Indie: this boy got plenty knowledge trust 😏 Billie: NADA 👏 Indie: you reping sound like the other mckenna rn Indie: something you wanna chat ? Billie: I don't need to come out, no Billie: but I appreciate the offer of a listening ear and open mind Indie: safe Indie: you down to mix me up 💘 potion? Indie: thatd be valued by me Billie: Why do you need it? I thought we were in love? Billie: Not you and me 😂 Indie: 😂 Indie: steady bills Indie: not trying to come for your sister & mckennas ⛈ Indie: let em have a min baby Billie: I don't think anyone is enjoying the rain Billie: we're safe to move on Indie: innit tho Indie: hold it for me @ school & ill come thru  yeah? Billie: Of course Billie: but what exactly do you want to happen? it changes what I have to do Indie: gotta keep him 😍😍😍😍😍😍 Indie: that mood Billie: That should be fine Billie: I can't force or influence freewill and fate, obviously but I can certainly help along what is there, that shouldn't be a problem Indie: what it gonna taste? Indie: not tryna make him 😵 Indie: not more than he like standard least 😂 Billie: It's okay, more than likely we'll get you to drink it Billie: then you can attract the love, if you see what I mean Indie: how it not gon attract some next man tho? Billie: with great power, Indigo Billie: you know how to control your allure, I trust 😂 Indie: mayb we swerve it Indie: not tryna get dashed for this like 💔 Billie: Well that shouldn't happen Billie: it's not viagra Indie: 😂😂 Billie: You seem worried Indie: nah Indie: all good Billie: Are you sure? Billie: I've got lots of things for anxiety and stress Indie: what i got to b flat roofin over? Indie: keep your stash Billie: you tell me Indie: nah im jam Indie: nothing to chat on Billie: Good Indie: how you b? Billie: Well, on reflection Billie: I'm okay most of the time but in general I'm quite sad Indie: 💔💔💔 Indie: you got no spells for it? Billie: I'm trying Billie: everything, every day Billie: but not everything can be sorted with magic Billie: not of that kind, anyway Indie: tru Indie: its a madness Indie: i feel it Billie: I know Billie: We've got to stick together Indie: ri aint here tho Indie: not how it can be Billie: Indie Indie: ? Billie: I think Edie has gone too Billie: lots of her stuff is gone Indie: she gon come back thru Indie: thats just how she rolls Indie: dont get it twisted & get 😢 Billie: I know but she usually only takes a bag Billie: if anything Indie: how you kno she not she not shoting her garms for the cash? Indie: gotta do what you gotta do innit Billie: Maybe you're right Indie: if you still got no peace after hot min come @ ri w it Indie: thats how she do making shit hectic again Indie: idk Indie: ma vibes like Billie: Like you said, she's not here either Billie: soon none of us will Indie: shes rollin deep w mckenna but she aint out your reach Indie: you in my inbox you can b in hers Billie: Not the same is it Indie: as face2face nah but better than no thing Indie: trust Billie: I guess so Billie: I hope she comes back Billie: it's horrible when we have to tell the police, they basically blame mum and dad Indie: the feds dont kno how to be anything but amp bringin the dred Indie: dont take it hard Billie: it was different the first few times Billie: now she's just a known runaway and they don't even try to help Billie: just get angry about the paperwork and wasted time Indie: they love to get vexed Indie: always on me too cos i got this face & name Billie: Yeah Billie: I thought they were meant to help Indie: nah baby they only bout helping theyselves Indie: sorry you had to get schooled on that like this Indie: been round me all days late cos the madness drew tryna live rn Indie: like i kno where hes @ Billie: I heard Billie: I always used to think it was a good thing when he went to prison Billie: is that bad Indie: nah man Indie: he heading back that kinda way rejoice in it if you wanna Indie: some good gotta come Billie: Selfish really Billie: but it meant you got to stay with us all the time and he wasn't around Billie: he messed with the vibes Billie: everything was bad when he was around Indie: speak your truth bills 😂 Indie: shots fired Billie: I'm sorry Billie: I try not to be hateful towards anyone but Indie: if you feel it you feel it Indie: whats acting like you dont gon do? Billie: I tend to think of it as wasted or at very least misplaced energy Billie: I try to feel sorry for people I don't get good energy from, or just ignore them Indie: i been knew about wasted energy fr 😂 waiting for my 🚀🚀 to hit like Indie: better energy be coming when i come up Billie: Does it work? Indie: yeah Indie: esp this new kick im on Billie: That's good Billie: what are the side effects Indie: depends what you trying to take Indie: dont be channelling the 👻 of my mas fix on your first go out Billie: I'm just working out the pros and cons Billie: doesn't it scare you? because you're mum died Indie: aint no thing that scares me Indie: we all going Indie: & she got me, not trying to let anything do me like how she went Billie: What's that like? Billie: I'm not scared of death but I'm in no great hurry Indie: its good Indie: nothing can touch me Indie: if im livin im livin if i aint i get to be this age forever 👻 Billie: That must be very reassuring Billie: What about good things though, can they touch you? Indie: how you mean? Billie: I mean, they say you have to know bad to know good Billie: so if you don't have that, do you get to have good or is untouchable outside of that Indie: i kno all it but it just dont be affecting me like that Indie: unless how i want it Indie: all good all the time Billie: Interesting Billie: I wish I could try it sometime Indie: i got you Indie: come thru & link me when Billie: Really? Billie: Okay Billie: I thought I might need a dead parent too Indie: is that tryin to be my key? idk Indie: i was reckonin on drews connections being that if there is Indie: 🚀🚀🚀 life Billie: I misunderstood slightly Billie: I thought that was what made you untouchable but in that case Billie: I'd be happy to try Indie: could be connected i cant speak on knowin Indie: i only got 1 dead ma & didnt get to kno her like that Billie: Yes, I would never ask you to share Indie: 😂 im saying i got others who aint Indie: so mayb its not a powerful thing Billie: we'll have to see Indie: not that i got em rn if you tryna test Billie: mothers or drugs? Billie: i'm lost Indie: mas Indie: you kno i always got the other Billie: Why not? Indie: we gone from each other Indie: like you said everyone is Billie: you just have to come round Billie: you know Indie: where? Billie: home Indie: but where that tryin to be now? Billie: Wherever your family is Indie: & who are they now? Billie: Whoever you choose Billie: us included, I hope Indie: nah Indie: it dont get to be however i want Billie: Why not? Indie: idk its not the way Indie: everyone tryin to tell me how to choose & aint listenin Billie: I'm listening Billie: and the universe Billie: What do you want, Indie? Indie: I want it how it was Indie: nah i want him gone and her back Billie: Yeah Billie: Me too Billie: I think we all do Billie: I'm thinking on ways to make it so Indie: but even if she comes home it aint gonna be for me just you Indie: we got too much beef Billie: I didn't know Billie: what happened? Indie: she got no love for me rn cos i trying to keep my mans Indie: she dont understand how i feel Billie: I see Billie: Did you tell her? Indie: yeah but she aint trying to kno she just wanna be vexed and tell me how to be Indie: shit gets too heated Billie: She'll calm down Billie: it's nothing to lose a sister over is it Indie: tell her Indie: she aint spoke to me since i got my ink Indie: she said she aint here for me its done Billie: I know she didn't mean that Billie: do you actually want me to talk to her for you? I can Indie: what you think you gonna say? Indie: she aint gonna be about me unless i dash him Billie: You're more important to her than that Billie: I'll just tell her you want to talk Indie: i cant Indie: i aint got no energy to be fighting w her Indie: hes here & she aint that decides it Billie: Okay Billie: It's up to you Indie: nah Indie: no things up to me they are how they are Billie: If you don't try to change them, yeah Billie: not saying you have to Indie: girl i aint got power like that i aint you Billie: If I had any more than you she'd be back already Billie: but you have to try, right? Billie: Passivity is still a choice Indie: it hurts Billie: I know Billie: but it doesn't feel Billie: good, lack of a better word Billie: accepting how it is either, does it? Indie: nah but its easier to act than trying & getting owned for it Indie: you feel me? Indie: if you gotta let stuff in where you gonna stop Billie: Hmm Billie: Good question Billie: When the stuff is more bad than it is good Indie: how you measuring Indie: shits such a heavy mix Billie: That's the trick, isn't it Billie: Depends how much bad you're willing to take Billie: they aren't equal, bad deeds weigh much heavier Billie: there'd need to be a lot more good to counteract them Indie: hear this, if a boy makes me feel everything that's bad and its good Indie: he hurts me and he wants me Indie: is it equal or nah? Billie: I can't tell you what you can deal with, only what I think you should Billie: and it doesn't sound equal to me Indie: but maybe close as imma get Indie: w how lads be Indie: they want what they want and how they want it & if he wants me then thats good Billie: What's good about it? Indie: feelin the love Indie: like who we tryna measure him against? mckenna? your da? idk thats a madness Indie: they grown Billie: I don't think all boys are like that Billie: or men Billie: there's an inbetween Indie: is it tho Billie: 'course Billie: we're not like lots of girls at school but we're not grown either Indie: idk maybe ive got things twisted Indie: or maybe i cant hit you w the real words Billie: That's alright, you don't need to Billie: get it right for yourself though, that's important, even if it takes a while Indie: what if rio been right & she hates me Billie: She doesn't hate you, for one Billie: and she's not going to hit you with an 'I told you so' Billie: give her a chance Indie: i gotta hit her up Indie: imma do it Billie: Well done Billie: I'm so sure it'll be worth it Indie: youre sick Indie: 💖💖💖 Billie: ❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜 🖤 Indie: real 👑 moves Indie: im not about to forget it Indie: 🚀🚀🚀 or nah Billie: 'Course not 😊 just try to see my notes next time 😂 Indie: innit tho Indie: come find me when he aint around Billie: 👍 Will do

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: Heyo boo Ali: thanks for Rocky wrangling with me today, you're now also his fave so, add that to your tally Carly: its k i had fun Carly: hes a cutie & cool kid Ali: me too Ali: yeah, he's alright, but cocky enough so I ain't telling him Ali: dunno where he gets that from 😏 Carly: ha Carly: yea idk Carly: no clue Ali: i'm sorry Ro was being off btw, I'm working out why but trust it wasn't you, babe Ali: been neglecting her lately, everyone wants a piece of me Ali: hard life Carly: idc its me too Carly: nobody wants a piece but you Ali: I just told you that ain't true, and Rocky is ruthless, he called one of my customers a 'big bum witch' the other day Ali: no tip for me, thanks dickhead Ali: but I want all of you regardless Ali: willing to throw hands Carly: aw Carly: this town is full of big bum witches tho Carly: my ma back for one Carly: but are you willing to use those hands for good too or Ali: awks if that was your Ma, like hey gurl, I think you rock it Ali: your daughter ain't bad either Ali: you know it, IOU 'cos we couldn't make like we were in the backrow of the cinema Carly: unless she been lying about where she at i think youve avoided meeting the in laws again Carly: k cuz you kno i need to collect soon Carly: bored Carly: just back and zoned out so fast Ali: ain't even got exciting stories from their galavanting? fucking rude Ali: at least when we go AWOL we also go wild Ali: make things happen, lads Carly: my ma's good for nothing but hairspray and peroxide Carly: only use if i get beat up again Carly: my da's good for cash tho if you wanna get wild w me Ali: or you wanna single white female me Ali: which would be a disappointing outcome to say the least Ali: can't tonight babe, I've gotta have some sister time Ali: go hard for both of us Carly: k Carly: try not to miss me bad when shes talking about me Ali: oh babe, she will not, and if she does I'll set her straight Ali: gonna let the world know you're my 😇 Carly: whatever her issue shes gotta air it and youre her sister so you gotta hear it Carly: idc shes not gonna hurt me w it Carly: and setting peeps straight is the opposite of how you do, babe Ali: true Ali: idk what issue she could have though, you're a literal ray of sunshine Ali: true again 😏 Ali: ugh, imma miss you Ali: maybe i can sneak out when she's gone to bed, the 'rents too Carly: i miss you now Carly: cant hear my parents say shit Carly: i just wanna talk to you Carly: dont tell me maybe & keep me waiting tho Ali: i will Ali: promise Carly: i dont wanna make trouble for you Carly: w anyone Carly: you can stay w her if you need to stay Ali: You won't Ali: I can do both Ali: be back before first light Ali: even if I'll miss watching the sun rise on your face 😔 Ali: we've got the night, baby Carly: but you kno if ive got you for the whole night youre gonna fall asleep Carly: thats what im good at Carly: feel free to tell your sister thats why you like me ha Carly: fun & tiring its magic Ali: hmm, we'll see who wears who out first, babe Ali: and if I am that husband, then you'll just have to wake me up with morning sex like the good little wifey you are 😘😂 Carly: always bringing that confidence i like it Carly: k but if my parents wake up too you can explain its a duty thing yea i had to like Ali: i like you Ali: for so many reasons and imma show you all of 'em tonight Ali: fuck that Ali: stay out with me, its warm enough Ali: i'll trace all the constellations out with my tongue so you won't ever forget Ali: educational Carly: my ma is asking me what im blushing about Carly: i told her what you said but she's not a believer Carly: support my education bitch Carly: ha Ali: i mean, i'd offer to let her see the benefits for herself but Ali: not gonna win me any brownie points 'cos she won't take me up on it Carly: she dont kno what she's missing but i do Carly: wish you were here Ali: me too Ali: start the party without me babe, i don't mind Carly: too late if you do Carly: gotta get through this reunion some way Ali: they aren't making you watch a slideshow, are they? Ali: fate worse than death Ali: Maybe you could go to Ronan's? Lmao, he's been up in my pussy way too much since he found out about us...didn't think we were THAT loud but ok boy Carly: yea Carly: might do cuz same Carly: but what if i miss you he can really make a night of it when he wants Ali: Nah, I won't let you face that disappointment, babe Ali: my spidey senses will tingle like not on my watch, fuckboy Carly: aw Carly: you gonna come get me? Carly: thats no way to get him out your pussy babe fyi Ali: yeah Ali: I know but I like the idea of showing you off as mine Ali: but no sharing, he only gets to watch and be mad he fucked it up Carly: i like it too Carly: youre hot when youre oneupping fuckboys Carly: i thought i knew how to do it best but k youre flipping the script Ali: as long as i'm besting them i'm doing my job right Ali: gotta keep you on-board Carly: speak of the devil Carly: how he know i was alone & horny Carly: my parents have only gone to the shops its uncanny Ali: know your neighbours but bit stalkerish, pal Ali: i'll text him to fuck off, freak him out Ali: how does she know, ha, two can play this game fucko and I'm more committed Carly: ha Carly: you gotta Carly: hes smoking im gonna bum one see what line he tries to lay on before the text sends Ali: On it Ali: gotta let him know there's a queue to court the princess now and he's at the back, soz Carly: he likes hitting it from the back he wont be put off Carly: im gonna show him some of the hot pics i took of you tho Ali: when is he ever tbf? 🐶👅💦 Carly: true Carly: that fucking cute tho aren't i Ali: you know it babe Carly: hes talking to my da now Carly: kill me Ali: how fucking dare he Ali: knowing he has the upper hand with the man bants Ali: i know how to change a tire too! love me! Carly: if my ma invites him in for tea im out of here Carly: she will think hes hot under the collar for her & bitch thats my groundwork Ali: Run baby run Ali: what kinda moron is he tho Ali: coulda had a private show if you just waited, now its all saturday night telly and flat lager Carly: you kno i have nowhere to go if you dont want me babe Carly: facts Carly: he likes me now he cant have me what a fucking Carly: like i wouldve fucked you but im not getting w you Ali: i do, is this full sos crisis mode though? 'cos i need to be good for a lil while longer yet Ali: such a typical bloke move that Ali: bet he ain't the only boy in ur inbox, not a pun Ali: 'cos he ain't in mine like 🙄 Carly: its k your sister needs you Carly: i can keep walking Carly: loads of other lads on site as well as in my inbox Carly: & they arent trying to say hi to me before we get down to it nevermind my parents Ali: 😾 Carly: why so sad blue eyed boo Ali: i don't like how lads treat you Ali: i'm not jealous, like swear to god, even though i obviously want you all to myself, i get it Ali: but i'm not about how shit they are to you, even if you don't care, they should care to be decent humans Carly: thats not lads its everyone Carly: youre the only one treating me different Carly: they dont know how else to be Carly: made my bed babe Ali: nah Ali: you don't deserve half the shit you get, that's bullshit Ali: and even the rest, people just don't wanna try to understand or be good, heaven forfend they inconvineince themselves for one second, like Carly: if im a slag im a slag i dont get to put conditions on it Carly: if it was a film maybe Carly: but theres no romance coming my way from theres and i dont want it Ali: why can't you just be you? someone who likes fucking, among other things Ali: not romance just like...not being a cunt Ali: idk Ali: pisses me off Carly: cuz you don't run the world even tho you strut it like you do and i love it Ali: not yet, babe Ali: one day, and you can be my right hand woman Carly: yea? Carly: take me w you & ill take you to all your fave places k Ali: k Ali: we'll be fun forever, I promise you Carly: gotta be Ali: you know i like you even when you ain't tho Ali: don't tell Carly: who would i Carly: ronans got enough for his wank bank & nobody else is chatting to me rn Ali: exactly, ruins the illusion and fantasy when they realise i care about you Ali: so unsexy of me Carly: youre sexy to me Carly: idc what they think Ali: good Ali: me either Carly: i like you too you kno Ali: yeah Ali: i had my suspicions Carly: i dont have any subtlety sorry about it Ali: Don't be Ali: I love it Ali: not enough people say what they mean or want, ever Carly: waste Carly: k i wasnt shouting how bad i wanted to kiss you before i did but not cuz i was bothered about me Ali: agreed Ali: sometimes you can't know you want something until you've got it Ali: i get it Carly: you get me Carly: its weird Ali: 🔮 Carly: ha Carly: k what am i thinking now Ali: wouldn't be proper to say Ali: tut tut bad girl Ali: like how you think though Carly: fuck Carly: youre good Ali: 🤷 don't mean to brag but remember that phrase you'll be screaming it later Ali: such a Ronan line, I can't 😂 Carly: but true Carly: not like when he says it Ali: 😍 Carly: what you doing w your sister Carly: gotta live through that cuz bored Ali: Fixing my weave Ali: getting into a white girl dread territory over here Ali: then gonna do some 🔮 forreal Ali: get ready for me to be even more of a know it all baby Carly: cute Carly: tell me my future i got some shit from another neighbor & im waiting for it to kick Carly: hows it gonna treat me Carly: needing a good trip Ali: we'll see who gets the answer first Ali: you got anything for me? Carly: yea Carly: they mystery but i kno you arent scared Carly: & you got me doing a test run rn lying on here on the grass Ali: 🌌 be there before it fades away my space explorer Carly: if you find me at a bad end prob dont take it Ali: is one of the lads trip sitting you Carly: so he reckons but hes drinking so theres no trust Carly: & he gave me it Carly: his game could be me lights out idk Ali: keep texting me, okay babe? Ali: if shit gets too real, tell me and I'll come early Ali: my sis is cool now, she gets what we're doing, she was just confused Carly: aw Carly: youre sweet Carly: you told her you like me Ali: 'course I did Ali: I ain't ashamed Ali: I'm proud Carly: youre gonna make me cry Ali: You're special, Carly Ali: You're gonna see Carly: I just wanna see you tho Ali: Me too Ali: I'm gonna make her some chamomile tea and then I'm coming, yeah? Carly: but thats not fair to her Carly: she's not gonna be a fan of me Ali: I've promised her more time tomorrow Ali: You need me rn Carly: but what if i want you to stay Carly: what are we gonna do then Ali: i'll stay until you're ready for me to go Carly: you mean that? Ali: yes Ali: promise, imma take care of you Carly: but theres nothing in it for you Carly: youve already got me you dont have to Ali: i wanna keep you Ali: and not just selfishly Ali: you gotta stick around, you're too cool to go anywhere, okay Carly: k Carly: im here & if you wanna be im not stopping you Ali: good Ali: i wanna be wherever you are Carly: i kept you pills back the lads didnt want me to but idc about them & you can follow me in now Ali: fuck them Ali: just me and you Carly: yea Carly: ill look after you too Ali: 😇 Ali: i know, i trust you Carly: idk if you should Carly: but i like it Ali: willing to take my chances Ali: you're worth it Carly: thats you Ali: i'm so glad i met you Carly: me too Carly: not that i met me thats weird Carly: you know what i mean Ali: i got you Ali: not high yet 😉 Carly: id seen you around before you guardian angel'd me that night Carly: thats weird too Carly: that i didnt see you how i do now Ali: it is Ali: you were always cute but Ali: idk, i can't claim to have seen this in my crystal ball Carly: thats cuz i wasnt cute i was a state Carly: & youd have more likely seen me sucking ronans dick Carly: look away babe you dont need to have that image in your mind Ali: don't need him reckoning he plays part in any of my fantasies, nah Ali: you can't not be cute, no matter how you try, soz babe Carly: you can't not be so sweet to me can you Ali: dunno Ali: not tried Carly: idk what id do if you did Carly: i got used to it Ali: got no plans to stop Ali: unless you ask me to, like Carly: thats not gonna be what i ask you to do Carly: trust me Ali: you can tell me all about it Ali: 5 minutes, tops Carly: okay

[punkscowardschampions]

Carly & Ali

Carly: last nite was good of you Carly: saying thanks cuz i read my text from last nite & it was Carly: I cudnt read it k thats facts Ali: nah, don't mention it, no bitch left behind Ali: plus, I know the cunt doing the ditching, been there, like Ali: was trying to translate but yeah, you were pretty fucked 😂 Ali: how you feeling this am? 💚 Carly: yea? hes not that bad Carly: im a slag like he said tbh Carly: feeling like i had a decent nite all things considered Carly: you? Ali: Gurl, yes he is and no you ain't! Ali: Probably Ali: Who cares if you are, he is, and the rest Ali: I dated him for a bit, so there's no shady, tryna steal your man on the sly going on, don't worry Ali: much the same, my head feels like someone took my eyes out and shoved 'em up my arse, you know? Ali: standard sunday vibes Carly: aw you're sweet but it's no diss on me Carly: like ive cheated on him a few times Carly: but he does it too you're right w that Carly: hes a good fuck when he's not too wasted tho which you kno if you got it too Carly: you're single now tho? Carly: can have him back if you want Ali: Fair play Ali: why not call it open and call it a day? Ali: Probs 'cos he likes fighting as much as he likes fucking Ali: Meh, yeah, was passable, gotta have some reason to keep him around, like Ali: Nah, going out with the girl that drove us back Ali: Remember? Dark hair, angry Carly: yea Carly: you know Carly: shit my bad Carly: she was scary is what i've got in my head Carly: idk my head is sketch cant trust it Ali: That's a fair assessment, I reckon Ali: She wouldn't hate it either so you good 😉 Carly: pretty tho Carly: call it a trade up Ali: Yeah, she's cute Ali: you need any more of the night filling in lemme know, I'll do my best Ali: it was pretty standard though, nothing too wild Carly: no faking it w her cuz shes too drunk Carly: designated driver be like Carly: last i see i was getting with his friend lowkey and he went off about it im blank from then Ali: its a fucking gay crime to ever fake it, no matter what Ali: I can get behind that one tho, not got the time or energy tbh Ali: yeah i think him and his friend then got in a scrap and then they left Ali: bros before hoes mentality hardcore, like idk, have fun jerking each other off then, if that's ur vibe boys Carly: k that sounds legit from what i caught on his socials Carly: didnt upload the circle jerk bless Carly: gay crimes must of been committed Ali: sad face Ali: coulda spat on his back Ali: protip Carly: ill let him know when he texts me later Carly: how did you kno where i live? state of me Carly: sorry to drag you this way Ali: plottwist, i'm a massive stalker with bad intentions Ali: I truly don't know, but I'll tell Lene she should be a cabbie 'cos she managed and I don't think we got any puke in her car Carly: k big lesbian crush on me yea Carly: ioher lots Carly: stealing her girl and wrecking her car in one Ali: Naturally, you cute Ali: I'll give you her number if you like, or just pass along the thanks and soz Carly: awh you're cuter Carly: probs still drunk tho Carly: giving me those kind words Carly: you handle the now ex if you love me Ali: Hahaha, he'd LOVE that Ali: ghosts of gf past Ali: Let me and I'll love you forever Carly: go for it Ali: let's see if I've still got his number Ali: this contact list is a minefield of mistakes but the real embarrassment would be getting them muddled up, fo'shame! Carly: i can give it Carly: used it more recently than you Carly: up there at my top Ali: won't be tellin' him that Ali: don't need the ego boost Ali: but tah Carly: makes it more fun to fuck him over if you praise him first Carly: but maybe thats me Ali: like a shit sandwich Ali: I get it Carly: hungry for anything but that rn Carly: [Sends the number tho] Ali: wanna come for brunch Ali: now you are newly gay Ali: that's what they do, fucking sex in the city up in dis bitch Carly: yea? weird Carly: not what i thought Carly: awh first date tho Ali: forreal, even the butch ones, don't let 'em fool you, its all fancy fucking eggs and screwdrivers by 11am Ali: you call 'em mimosas tho, gotta pretend you're being classy Carly: wtf is a screwdriver Ali: Babe! Ali: Vodka and orange juice Carly: i call it that Carly: gays and their labels Ali: save it for the rant sesh honey Ali: love you talking about how men ain't shit as well Carly: thats the ones i fuck Carly: cant be bringing no poshos to a caravan Ali: Posh boys are only good for the money anyway, I'm sure Ali: not finding any in 24 like regardless Carly: not gonna find out if they do drive by now im a lesbian wife Carly: sorry lads Ali: they had their chance Ali: unlucky boys Carly: should prob tell me your name again if im taking it Ali: Ruins the mystery a bit but alright Ali: Its Ali Ali: Ali McKenna if we're being formal Carly: k you've got the hot brothers Carly: makes sense Ali: 🤔 Ali: I think you're thinking of someone else, babe Carly: not trying to have our first fight but you coulda told me before we got hitched, bitch Carly: you're still hot tho don't be sad Ali: so you could run off with one of my brothers? i think not Ali: unless you meant Tommy 'cos he's very single but that's unlikely because he's never here Ali: stuck with me for now, hoe 😘 Carly: a slag like me could do worse Carly: has Ali: bitch, same Ali: we can compare notes, see how many regrets we got in common Carly: yea Carly: doing it Ali: Good, save it for brunch 'cos I'm coming forreal Ali: we don't have to deal with a gaggle of gossiping gays tho, bring you a maccies breakfast? Carly: k Carly: be fun Carly: you are from what i remember Ali: I like that Ali: No bullshit Ali: Imma start all interactions like be fun please or I'm out Ali: ✌ bringing the fun and the bacon babe Carly: you're not bringing your gf are you Ali: Nah, how awkward, meet the missus, honey Carly: like there's usually a lad in my trio sorry Carly: still learning this lesbian life Ali: oh, are you bi legit? Ali: she's way too jealous for threesomes, you're good Carly: nah i just know what lads want Ali: Oh gurl Ali: that's why Lene ain't coming Ali: the lecture you're avoiding Carly: idc Carly: youre my wife now bitch Ali: 💍💍 Ali: Productive morning, if I do say so myself Ali: and we're hanging, fuck with us Carly: good influence of you cuz i havent done fuck all this week Ali: Hard work being a bi icon, babe Ali: wait 'til I get you on the yoga hype Carly: wtf Carly: is that a joke Ali: nah, I've already done half an hour this morning Carly: bitch i had my fingers crossed you mistyped yogurt Carly: i love you but its a no Ali: 😂 lets be really into yogurt, not fancy stuff, like fucking froobs Carly: phallic Carly: slurping on my dick shaped yogurt Ali: exactly Ali: what do men love more than a representation of their genitals shoved in your mouth? nothing, is the answer, bar the real thing Ali: so seductive Carly: they don't like food in bed tho, but maybe thats my technique Carly: thinking you could use whatever Carly: k just gonna dump this curry out yea bear with Ali: spicy Ali: imagine the yeast infection you'd get from a fromage frais Carly: like sorry but if i can handle cum in my eye you can deal with some saag aloo boy Carly: googling those symptoms would be a laff tho Ali: ugh, now i want indian Carly: date 2, babe Ali: 😍 Ali: this is all moving so fast Ali: 'bout it Carly: thats all i kno about lesbians k Ali: Its so true Ali: Can confirm Carly: is your gf gonna be mad that im flirting with you Carly: cuz im scrappy but she's scary Ali: 😂 Ali: Probably but when I tell her you're straight she'll have to chill Ali: yeah, we're married BUT SHE'S STRAIGHT, BABE Carly: can't tell her how many girls ive fucked cuz i dont remember Carly: convenient Ali: Best keep that on the DL, yeah Ali: like your blatant gay feelings for me Carly: k Carly: been a secret before no big Ali: Awh babe, ain't nothing dirty about this Ali: I shall tell the world Carly: you're sweet Ali: Probably not if you still wanna be getting that D but you know, noblest intentions, like Carly: im over it Carly: go off Ali: when your pussy's the cure Ali: how can I be humble now? 😏 Carly: dont be Carly: proud slags who fucking love froobs Carly: its a mood Ali: that is a whole ass mood Ali: put it on a t-shirt, babe Carly: earn some bread for my table Ali: solid business plan Ali: we can't be the only ones Carly: independent women who don't need no dick Carly: anymore Ali: hell yeah! Ali: unless that dick wanna pay the bills, in which case we'll let 'em Ali: so we can get more froobs Carly: point Ali: oh no, someone put a pic of Molly Briggs vomming on Insta Ali: 1. gross 2. who hasn't been there, poor bitch Carly: sad Carly: hope she's alright Ali: I'd ask but don't really know her and her phone must already be blowing up Ali: plus she threw a netball right in my face once and I don't forget, bitch Ali: jk, I'll just report the pic 😂 Carly: they all call me a whore cba to keep track of which mollys or other bitches Ali: She is a bit of a bitch, ain't gonna sugarcoat it so probably Ali: not saying Karmas real but posted on that friggin' TallaghtSlags page so 🤷 Ali: grab a froob, darling Carly: her name makes me wanna party with her dad but thats as far as im fucking with that family Carly: or mum i dont know who picked it like Ali: Init, proper old skool ravers, obvs Ali: think I'm out of eccies, sadly Ali: last night depleted me Carly: Watch me call my son Bennie cos I got anxiety, baby Ali: Cute tho, whole medicine cabinet of babies Carly: why not im married now Ali: We'll get on that, date 3, like Carly: where you taking me? Ali: up the wheyyyyyyyyyy Ali: well, we had brunch, indian, obvs we're fat bitches Ali: get on that chinese buffet life Carly: you can get on your yoga mat tho Carly: im fucked Carly: letting myself go so soon my bad Ali: Please, you're perfect Ali: I'll have all the kids if you want Carly: blushing is what i am Carly: how many you want? Ali: how many people names are there for drugs? molly bennie mandy charlie umm Ali: and our preachy child, frank Carly: ha Carly: tina that's one Ali: Ooh, yes, a gay icon Carly: billy, bud our weak child, cosmic kelly who's gonna have to style that out Ali: oh kelly, I hope you have the personality to match or we've really fucked you over there, soz babe Carly: can't forget dimitri, lucy or mandy Carly: sweet sweet mary joy Ali: My fanny hurts just thinking about it Carly: christine and tina are obvs twins thats a relief Carly: how manys that? Ali: 13 Ali: Unlucky for some but my actual lucky number! Ali: Fated Carly: ha Carly: it's love and keeps being proven Ali: can't fight what's clearly so right Carly: true Ali: you want a milkshake Ali: i'm having one Carly: yea Carly: strawberry Ali: 'cos u so sweet 💚 Carly: awww Ali: I shall be right there, with brunch fit for a pair of proud slags Carly: k Carly: my parents arent here no need to break the news of wedded bliss Ali: Would be a weird first impression but I could rock it Ali: new fave in-law? I think so Carly: yea Carly: cant fight fate like Carly: been said Ali: forreal, catch me outside if you got something to say, lads Ali: alone time with the bae is always good tho Carly: you kno Carly: love you bitch Ali: love ya 😘