#sorry this is probably incoherent i'm just feeling derranged

[toastytrusty]

feeling especially insane about romelukas tonight thinking about the way lukas wanted to buy out waystar from his first meeting with logan thinking about the way he immediately recognized the denial roman has towards everything wrong with his life and the toxic sense of self he derives from his father and the company and immediately wants to strip it all away (when is your dad gonna die?) and remove every safety net (buying waystar) and bad coping mechanism and farce he can hide behind (encouragement to be honest and share his emotions) and force him out of the suffocating security he has with his family and force him to be his own person . the way it could be seen as caring and kind and, in a way, is, but is also a challenge and brutal and exactly what roman needs. someone who's not going to enable his inability to be a person and just rip away every support beam and force him to stand on his own. the way lukas smiles at him on the mountain when rome said he killed logan, the way he upped his offer because of that explosion, the way he went to make sure he got waystar from mencken after romes breakdown at the funeral. the way rome is slowly breaking under the weight of the worlds places upon his shoulders and lukas is the only one who can hear him crying. the way he takes away all the security rome wants to believe he has (mencken, and, not to make shiv's thing with lukas abt rome bc from her perspective it's not, but from his it very much could be read as him knowing shes close with rome and using her to pry waystar away from him goes to show him that nobody is real). the way lukas frees him from the machine he was built for but was too afraid to ever admit he didn't fit into.