#sorry i haven't been here in literally a month and a half 😭 life's been so FREAKING BUSY

[bisexualrapline]

happy yoongi day

[pandora-writes-one-piece]

I've been wanting to say this for a while since I read The Great Pretender and read Trust one-shot you recently wrote...

Warning, this got long.

Your Modern Doflamingo...

I ADORE HIM and his insanity and evilness and him in his perfectly pressed pink suit and "each step of his expensive shoes felt like a nail in the coffin"

HE IS PERFECT.

LORD HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL OMG HE'S SO 🫠🫠🫠 & EVIL. AND HOT. EVIL. MANIACALLY EVIL. LAUGHING EVIL MAN. And so terrifying

I NEED HIM.

CARNALLY.

OH MY GOD.

I NEED TO STRIP HIM BARE - BOTH LITERALLY AND FIGURATIVELY - AND SEE WHAT MAKES HIM TICK.

You wrote him beautifully, Pandora, like that "oh to be a strawberry right now~" scene I choked, and how much of a little shit he is (well, big shit, bcs wtf sleeping with Monet, the fuck Doffy that shit was TERRIBLE but very on point for him) and him in a FULL PINK SUIT? Like I was FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE, I was sweating.

Also, calling him "sir" yeah I was not fine.

The biggest scene for me was that blindfold game where he grabbed Y/N’s hands, put them on his chest and asked, "are you sure?"

I dropped my phone 😭😭 I may have screamed a bit. I had to keep saying to myself, "Keep your head in the game, this is Law x Reader, don't fall for Law's evil sexy uncle!"

... I fell for Law's evil sexy uncle. 😔 (I also fell for Law omg I love how you write Law 💛)

Also, I love how Doflamingo switched from charming to absolute chilling menacing guy when he was trying to keep Y/N away from Law and make her go away. You showed that cruel, businessman side of him so well. And overall just described him great as this intimidaitng, unnerving guy. Just perfect.

It's interesting how he thinks women want "money, thrill, influence, power" that a man has. Ugh, no, Doffy, sometimes a woman just wants a man, sometimes it really IS that simple.

Also, him saying "women need a firm hand" gave me chills and for the first time made me go "Where's Law? Law, help!" so very good job on that.

"Everybody needs love..."

"Not the Donquixote Family."

Idk why but this broke my heart. Doffy. Who the fuck hurt you? Give me their address and their name, big guy, I'll handle 'em 😤

Ngl during that entire scene I was like "kick that pink bastard in the balls and run to Law!"

The sentence he said... It seems like Doflamingo hates outsiders. But... You can't keep your family members from dating someone! Which... Doflamingo certainly does. Like it sorta comes from a good place but his methods are BRUTAL.

I also love how toxically protective he is of Law and his family. Dear god, he was ready to RUIN Law's clinic! His love is so toxic and controlling and just... you absolutely nailed it.

I have been in a brainrot about him since I finished reading Great Pretender bcs I want to know more about him.

Idk what this Doflamingo needs, he is such a red flag, but I'm wearing red sunglasses so...

I would love a Reader butting heads with Doffy. "You wanna threaten me, big guy? Try me. Fucking try me. Oh, you make predictions? Here's my prediction: my knee kicking into your dick if you don’t move." That's the sort of attitude a woman needs to have with him. 🤣

Either that, or his partner!Reader needs to be in the Donquixote Family. Now that would be an interesting one, especially if he's falling and she isn't... at all 🤣 bcs of how toxic and controlling Doflamingo is 🤣🤣

Doflamingo seems to have been surrounded by greedy people who always want something from him - A LOT. I mean, considering his life and job, obviously he is. Imagine how horrible it is to always have to question people's motives for him. God, isn't that exhausting? He needs a massage, which I will happily offer.

And Mafia Boss Doffy in Trust? UM... YES PLS. HE'S INSANE. I WANT HIM. I ADORE HOW UNHINGED AND CRAZY YOU WRITE HIM KEEP DOING THAT 1000/10.

Anyway. This has been your "I love how you write Modern Doffy I haven't stopped thinking about him for a month and a half" appreciation ask. He is terrifying and I love it. 🥺🩷

Sorry for going on a rant, I just love how you write Doffy, he's so crazy I love him, I can't stop thinking about him.

Keep doing what you're doing with Doffy, literally 1000/10 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

I'm sorry this got long. In the end, I want to say I have high appreciation for how you write Modern Doffy. Like gosh, what a man. If you ever decide to write sth with him, I will probably be the first in line to read it 🤣 Your Modern Doffy is just wonderful, even if he's a walking red flag dressed in pink.

Also, Cora is such a sweetheart not stepping on Y/N's feet. Good job, Cora. I would dance with Cora all day.

Also, with the amount of staring at Y/N Doflamingo did in Great Pretender, myb his "game"/"testing her" turned a bit too personal for him? In the end, it wasn't a "I was right" for him it was him "selling the ruse" so he DIDN'T WIN. He wasn't right. His only way to win was to lie and make a misunderstanding. He. Did. Not. Win. Y/N stuck with Law even in that moment and tried to make everything right. Doflamingo had to THREATEN her. He had to physically BLOCK HER WAY. And that probably rattled him, bcs it wasn't a "I was right" win it was him "selling the ruse" so he didn't win. He wasn't right. His only way to win was to lie and make a misunderstanding. He. Did. Not. Win. Y/N stuck with Law even in that moment of panic. And that probably rattled him. Bcs he DIDN'T WIN. It wasn't a win at all. It was a "holy fuck, I need to threaten her and physically block her way to keep her from fixing things with Law" Who knows, myb Doflamingo wanted Y/N for himself after he split her and Law up. He seemed so pissed she wasn't giving up even at that point that he had to pull the clinic and threatening Shanks cards. (I am delulu, ignore me)

Anyway, thanks for making me obsessed with your Modern Doflamingo. He drives me insane. I love him 🩷

Thank you for all your works you share with us ❤️ (and again, sorry this got too long 😭)

-@physics-of-one-piece

Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!

The way I giggled and squealed and screeched while reading your unhinged rant/ask got my cats giving me the stink eye! And I don't care! I will squeal all I have to squeal and I stand by it!!

I'm so in awe with your words! Thank you so, so much for the kindness in them!

I have to admit... I'm not the biggest Doffy fangirl. He hurt my baby Law too much for me to give him a break. But he is SUCH A FREAKING GOOD VILLAIN! I can't get enough of evil/maniac Doflamingo. He's so appealing to write because I can go full deranged, full unhinged, extra maniacal! And I feel so happy that you like the way I write him!

I have full intentions of writing for more OP characters once I finish my Meet-Cute series, maybe Doffy is going to be one of them... he just fits the evil role so well.

And I have a thing for writing OP characters in modern AU's because of the freedom it gives me to explore all the little nuances of their canon selves. And I admit, I love to throw in some Easter Eggs and little nods to canon too.

The Great Pretender Doffy was challenging to write at first, because I knew I wanted him to be cruel and evil, but I also wanted to show WHY he was doing it. He just had a crooked sense of love. Yes, somebody hurt him (maybe this author needs to write a backstory?), yes, he doesn't believe in love outside of family ties and trust. Can he actually love without it feeling like ownership? Can he love altruistically? Does he allow himself to be loved? Or would he forever feel like the person loving him is only after power, wealth, influence? 🤔🤔 So many delicious questions to explore, actually...

He is the biggest red flag ever!! And isn't that the most delightful thing in fiction? That we get to fall for red flags? That we get to "fix them", or maybe not, because that's the thrill of it? 😶 Gosh... are you turning me into a Doffy fangirl? Because from what you've shown us by the size of his hands... I mean... just for that I'd fold... 😂

Thank you, thank you, thank you again for the lovely ask. It has really brightened my day and made me a giggly mess! I won't make promises, but it's actually VERY LIKELY I might write more modern Doffy 😋, like I said, he's such a great villain!

Thank you again! ❤️❤️❤️

[septembersghost]

Jess, hey, darling. I'm sorry I still haven't replied to your message (please forgive me), just something quick I wanted to say. I wish I could give you a hug and I'm sorry for the struggles you're going through. I hardly know anything and staying away from all the drama but I KNOW how important it is to have your safe, comfort place, and when it gets taken away it can feel crushing and very painful. I think I understand why you're missing Dean. There was a time in my life when I THOUGHT I'd recovered, but then some painful, or confusing/disorienting, or otherwise overwhelming situation hit and I'd start missing him like crazy, because I needed comfort and rest and I tried to reconnect. We need our safe place and our comfort characters when we are in pain, when we are tired, when the world isn't making sense anymore. It's not something I talked about, but recently I had a series of anxiety attacks and crying fits at night, and on Friday night during one of those I also accidentally flipped over a cup of scalding water over my hand. What helped me with the pain and helped me fall asleep was… listening to my comfort character's voice. Didn't even matter what he was saying, it was just simply hearing his voice and imagining he's there (thank god it's a podcast and he can talk for hours.) I'm doing a lot better now, but I remembered how I used to do the same thing with Dean. There was once a whole audio file I made which was literally just him talking, it lasted like an hour and a half and consisted of hundreds tiny moments which I collected throughout the show. Sadly, it's gone now, but there was a time it used to help. What I want to say, things like this ARE important and your connection to your faves IS important and valuable, it's totally okay to miss them, it's okay to love them and to need them, it's okay to wish they were here right now. I understand your pain, I wish I knew how to help. But no matter what, he'd always be there for you, because that's what comfort characters do: they're here for us. Always, as long as we need them. And nothing can take that away. And no matter what, I hope you can find solace and comfort and a bit of peace. I'm giving you a hug but I'm ALSO encouraging you to imagine that Dean is giving you a hug, because he absolutely would and because he'll always be there for you.

hi Ellie my dearheart!!! 💕 please don't apologize, considering i still have the message from you, on one of my favorite topics!, that i intended to answer within a week and now TWO MONTHS have passed! the amount of times i've gone to reply to it properly and instead *waves hand around* there are constant happenings and situations. 😭 i NEED to get to it because it will make me happy to focus on tbh!

there's a bemusing irony to the fact that i proclaimed i was doing #better in regards to dean and other various sadnesses, and then the moment an entirely different pillar got kicked out from under me, the hurt came rushing back in. i've been playing a bit of a (useless, i know) blame game with myself, like, this is somehow my fault for being overly invested or caring as deeply as i do or relying on art for my escape and joy, but it's difficult because it's the primary thing i have. and dean is the constant, the longest lasting source of comfort of all of them, so at any point when anything else has been painful or confusing, the needle of my heart's compass spins back to him. except i'd intentionally been trying to rely on that less due to the existing wound of it, which means over the past week, there's been this weight of the absence, which lead to that feeling of missing him terribly.

I KNOW how important it is to have your safe, comfort place, and when it gets taken away it can feel crushing and very painful. I think I understand why you're missing Dean. There was a time in my life when I THOUGHT I'd recovered, but then some painful, or confusing/disorienting, or otherwise overwhelming situation hit and I'd start missing him like crazy, because I needed comfort and rest and I tried to reconnect. We need our safe place and our comfort characters when we are in pain, when we are tired, when the world isn't making sense anymore. this is it exactly, and i can't express my gratitude for your kindness and for the sense of understanding you share in this. those safe spaces and comforts and lights through the darkness ARE profoundly valuable and we carry them with us, and it hurts when any of that feels stolen or diminished. it makes you just want the soul of it back.

*hugs you tight* i am so sorry you've been struggling with anxiety and tears (i understand, i have NOT been able to stop crying at the most unexpected moments lately. i wept over my dog this past weekend and she's been gone for years. it's like every ache i have is a raw nerve at the surface. anxiety makes you feel more fragile too). the scalding water omg honey :((( i'm glad you're okay! and i'm happy your comfort character was there for you and helped carry you through it. you deserve to feel safe and held, and that very much exists within the characters we love and the stories we call home and the art/music that resonates within us.

What I want to say, things like this ARE important and your connection to your faves IS important and valuable, it's totally okay to miss them, it's okay to love them and to need them, it's okay to wish they were here right now. thank you very much for this reminder and for understanding this, i really do believe this is true. our faves impact us and are important and loved for a reason. just sending me this helps, truly.

I'm giving you a hug but I'm ALSO encouraging you to imagine that Dean is giving you a hug, because he absolutely would and because he'll always be there for you. 🥺 this message is beautiful and now i'm crying at it, but only for warm reasons! he's always shown up in some way to remind me of this (and still did in a way this morning!), so i KNOW he's right here and remains with me no matter what and that the span of that time and amount of that love is always real and always alive and exists right in my heart, and if it didn't, i wouldn't also experience that pain of missing him along with it. the ache itself is a sign of how strongly that love remains. thank you for the hugs and for listening and for being here for me, and for reminding me he's here at every moment too. you are such a wonder and i love you. 💖💖💖

[skinni-girls-eat-books]

Monday, December 30th, 2024!

8:15am: Just took like ten stressful minutes to unclog the toilet and I immediately had to poop again but it's fine now. Perfect timing 💀I really thought I broke that bitch

9:43am: lol rotting in bed. Nervous about my financial aid, kinda want to see how little I can spend in January and still have a wonderful time. More free things, more cheap house shows, more bringing your own food/ alcohol. Ugh so many goals lol we'll see what sticks. Had a peach seltzer thing today 45 cal. Don't even know why I'm counting cals bc I'm gonna blow it up with all the meat and cheese I'm eating 😅

10:36am: Rum punch with meat and potato bowl 😋😋😋😋 I want to watch a murder mystery but I really want it to be a good one lol or something scary I haven't seen before. Craving novelty ughh

Midnight: Lol I feel like a loser when I start to look at all the places I've never been to before here. I've done quite a few things, but not a lot of the nature stuff that is very available here. What can I say, I moved here for the city life and might end up staying for the nature vibes lol maybe I'm just getting old... Mid 20s is a weird time...

I really spent 7 hrs today basically just looking up shit to do.... Idk why it makes me feel like I wasted a day but like it's really hard to find things to do???? Why are events and places like hidden. Like they don't want people to know about shit or go anywhere or do anything. I don't understand. Literally probably won't even go to half of it but it's ok. Plus just the sinking feeling that I'm trying to avoid studying and shit like that.... Ugh I'm so over school like jesus christ who let me do this to myself. Ridiculous lol 🙃 it's fine, I'm fine, these holidays in the middle of the week are kicking my ass. Can't ever just have normal fucking days off. Seriously. Never. Only having time off when everything revolves around a holiday and everything is closed and everyone expects you to be somewhere doing something specific...... sucks... sorry for being a grinch but it's true. I just want normal days offffffff. Why why why is it so normal for me to not have a fucking schedule. This isn't good or healthy like wtffddd this isn't how adults live. People plan vacations, plan their routines, days off, fucking ugh. My life is too random and I'm just kinda done with this. I want to work a regular schedule so I can have a regular flow of energy. Ok it's like people binge eating when they don't have regular access to food except my body BINGE SLEEPS because I don't know when I'll be able to just rest again 💀😭 I have been stuck BINGE SLEEPING on my days off for a whole month now. My sleep schedule is fucked and I'm constantly tired :( but at the same time very well rested like I could do something if someone invited me somewhere for example. But my default now is like: OH HI, NOTHING URGENTLY REQUIRING ALL YOUR TIME FOCUS AND ENERGY?? GREAT, TIME TO SLEEP FOR 20 HOURS AND WASTE ALL YOUR FREE TIME!! Not even getting out of bed to eat or shower like my body has been in sleep starvation mode. Fuck me man. Welp.

I'm glad I wrote this down bc binge sleeping is exactly the right way to describe what I've been going through. And I guess this particular moment of panic/ feeling like I wasted the day, is equivalent to purging a binge, because I'm clearly fucking myself more for staying up until 2am just *because I slept all day*. Wowowwwwwww fuck I love journaling and I just solved my problem! Fuck I'm dumb and prone to self destructive behavior.