#sorry for the oblique menetics reference

[translesbiantheo]

universemademanifest replied: if this is re alec holowka, but i def think there was both. he threatened suicide as a way to control people multiple times, but he also genuinely struggled with self hate and suicidal urges. the latter does not excuse the former. i dont think he killed himself out of guilt, but bc he knew the gig was up, and i wouldnt be surprised if he did want vindication in death. universemademanifest fascists are v much a death cult who glorify dying for ones group, so they probably take already angry and vulnerable men who suffer with self hate and urge them to turn that self harm into something glorious thag will hurt those they hate. its a group effort. —-

(Sorry for terrible formatting I’m on my phone) Well, your mentioning him is what made made me think of it now but I’m more interested in the general case than in figuring out the specifics of one actor’s motivations. But yeah, I mean, I think there must always be some self hate and depression cos like, otherwise why not just move to somewhere no one knows your name and start over? And I would also say that those things can feed into each other, the inner voice that might usually fight suicidal thoughts drowned out by the voice that wants to regain control/lash out in revenge and all that passion and motivation can be focussed on thinking about how awful they have it/because the degree of awfulness is proportional to the need for revenge.

Hmmm, yeah, idk? I feel like I feel like how canmom said about abusers but with fash too? Like, we’re all raised in a world with a lot of fascist tendencies and like I don’t think there’s really a clear line between like, much more run of the mill behaviours and people and groups and fash ones? But I suppose descending to extreme fash rather than like, fash-lite neoliberalism is something that is more common/targeted to hurt or vulnerable folk so that still makes sense?

But then is fascism an abberation of a normally successfully self interested group dynamic that ends up killing its members? Or is it like a cult where there are a select few leaders who are pulling the strings and who actually do stand to benefit to some extent? Or is it like something we’d have to explain in terms of like, deep irrationality embedded in people or ideas/cultural phenomena that exist because they self replicate rather than because they benefit anyone?