#sorry for going off on your post op i've been holding this in for months
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Reblogged with all the tag bc it spoke to me
Fuck it. If you're american the best thing you can do for Palestine right now is vote for Harris.
#i haven't talked about irl politics much on this blog lately you know for the sake of keeping my sanity and all#but i'm gonna be real this close to the election i just have no fucking patience for the ''both sides bad!!!'' crowd#sorry if that makes me a cringe neolib or whatever but the lives of real people are more important than your holier than thou principles#there is no fucking dilemma here this is like being asked ''cake or death?'' if you have to think about it there's something wrong with you#swallow your fucking pride get off your lazy ass and go drive 15 goddamn minutes to vote#i don't care if you think it's useless it can't be more useless than just sitting around bitching about it on tumblr#sorry for going off on your post op i've been holding this in for months#i'm so tired of hearing absolute nonsense about this#this is in fact the number one most useful thing right now. if palestine is your priority you should be voting harris.#and also i'm very sorry everyone i know i'm not a political blog
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Brother's Keeper AU:
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How did Caleb live so long? How can he still be here after 400 years?
A: Belos wanted him to stick around and so he made it happen. As for specifics: *shrugs* your guess is as good as mine! This is something I've preferred to leave up to the readers. I will simply confirm that he isn't hiding any goop powers or OP palisman-given magical abilities. He is, for all intents and purposes, a regular human who is somehow really, really old.
Q: If Caleb is still alive, where did Hunter come from?
A: The full story here hasn't been told yet, but you may notice Caleb is missing quite a few bones...
Q: Caleb's ears are pointed! Did Belos cut them??
A: Correct
Q: Does Caleb know about the Collector/the basilisks/Belos' plans?
A: Probably! He's been Belos' sounding board for 400 years. Access to things that could "further corrupt him" or provide him a tool for escape, however, are off limits, so there are many things, like the Collector, that he's heard about but never seen for himself.
Q: Where's Flapjack/Amity/Darius/etc?
A: This is basically a canon divergence. If you haven't seen a particular character, it's safe to assume for now that they're up to whatever they were doing in canon.
Q: I don't get it. Why is Caleb insane?
A: I suggest you reread the first few story posts, my friend! You have fallen for Belos' lies.
Q: Do you have a posting schedule? When will the next part come out?
A: There is no posting schedule. I draw (mostly but not always) traditionally in my free time, for the fun of telling a cool story, and some posts are longer than others. That means the timing of the next post depends on how long it is, how much time I have, and whether or not I'm at home with access to my scanner. Sometimes this means I post quickly. Sometimes it means you'll see me next month. Sorry about that.
Just know that if I know there's going to be an extended wait, especially one where I'm not actively working on the next drawing, I will make an announcement about it. If you haven't seen an update in a while but I also haven't said anything, it's almost definitely because I'm actively chipping away at a part of the story that's taking me longer.
Q: Why do some of the story posts have a letter after the number? Are these less important than the regular story posts? Can I skip them?
A: No, I Do Not Recommend skipping them! They are just as important as the others. They have a letter on the end because they were added later and I use letters as a way to avoid renumbering everything. If you see story posts labeled something like "3, 3A, 4", they are meant to be read the same as you would if they were "3, 4, 5".
Q: Can I make art/fic/cosplay of this au?
A: Knock yourself out! If you post it somewhere, please include credit, but otherwise I don't mind, and actually love seeing what you do with it! If it's NSFW though, please keep it in appropriate spaces with proper warnings.
Q: Wait there's fic/fanart?? Can I see?
A: If you look through the tag on my blog "BK fridge gallery" you can browse any content shared with me that I've reblogged. :) People are free not to share it with me too though, and there are some I don't reblog, especially if its gorey or suggestive, so you might be able to find a bit more elsewhere under the Brother's Keeper AU name if you look for it.
You may also notice I have a featured tag called "BK Soundtrack." That's for songs that people have suggested to go with the AU. You are welcome to browse or suggest songs of your own ;)
Q: :( I sent an ask but you didn't answer. Did you get it?
A: Probably, yes. Sometimes it takes me a few days to get to it. However, if it was theorizing about future plot points, I may actually be holding onto it with plans to answer at a more appropriate time. I like to keep many of my plans for the story close to the chest, so don't be surprised if your theory ask disappears only to show up many months later when the story has progressed to a point where I can give you a more in depth answer.
#Brother's Keeper AU#doodletext#putting this together for the repeat questions! Will add to the master post later.
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Intro <3 !
I go by Michelangelo or any variation of that
(usually michael/mikey but names dont mean much to me)
but i recently found out that i'm the host of a system so if any tags are signed off with a different name thats why
dont care too much abt pronouns but i typically use he/him, ve/vir, and xe/xir/xem. mix it up, get creative. typically dont use she/her but ynever know
body is 21, we're an aries if u wanna make any judgement off of that, autistic + adhd if that wasnt obvious
i do post occasional nfsw/suggestive content, never anything too crazy but if youre a minor id prefer if you didnt interact with those posts, i have no way of enforcing this as i dont check my notifs unless theres tags but i am a full adult, i do pay rent and bills and taxes. on that topic i probably wont follow you if youre under like. 16/17ish. no hard feelings i just am an adult and im not around kids very much as the 2nd youngest of 4 so. if youre under 16 dont do drugs stay in school all that good stuff. i love you, go to bed on time. i've been on this website since i was 11 and it shows. dont be me.
dms are always open ! i'm not amazing at holding a conversation unless its abt my current hyperfixation (rn its zelda/lu) but i love to yap. if you follow me and we're not mutuals dm/ask me and ill follow back! I don't rly pay attention to my followers so i typically don't follow ppl unless theyre consistently posting abt one of my interests and i remember to
I talk in the tags a LOT feel free to <- prev or rb addressing my tags but i typically assume no one will read them all the way through. i'm writing whole essays. im oversharing. call op a college admissions office bc I'm telling my whole life story. if my tags make you uncomfortable on your post please let me know and i will apologize/delete them if you wish. i dont have a concept of tmi and tend to misread/miss social cues/the vibes so i apologize if i misstep
please let me know if i reblog any stolen artwork/ai generated anything/ etc
‼️‼️i am not spoiler free for anything (even if i myself havent seen the content) i dont have any sort of tagging system ‼️
list of my active fandoms! old hyperfixations tend to creep up on me so this is not complete
- bungo stray dogs (bsd beast fans pls follow me i adore beast)
- legend of zelda (all games + lu/links meet aus)(legend fans pspspsp)
- the witcher (mainly the show but i got attached to a character thats not even actually in any of the games. aiden i love you.)
- cars (2006, 2011, 2017)(yes entirely unironically)
- Voltron legendary defender. (again. yes. unironically.)
- star wars (mainly the main series and animation since i havent read thr or played the games)
- jujutsu kaisen (2nd years stan)
- the magnus archives (gerry delano fans i love you)
- percy jackson (mainly the books and musical, i dont care for the show much but i adore the actors)
- gravity falls ! (i actually just got into this like, last month. binged the whole series in like a week at age 21.)
- my hero academia (my hs best friend made me watch s1 and i got attached to aizawa hawks and the todorokis sorry)(im convinced the todorokis were based on my family. im literally natsuo. dont ask abt dabi unless u think you're prepared)
Non Fandom Interests
- I write ! once i start uploading ill link my ao3 here but its rough out here (microsoft word)
- I draw ! i mightve posted my art a few times but as i mentioned i dont have any tagging system so maybe I'll make one for art or link another social at some point
- this mostly falls under loz but i love video games :3 i MOSTLY play loz but animal crossing, minecraft, and random silly da games ive collected over the years are my pride and joy. i want to play the witcher games but i have assassins creed black flag and im really bad at it. (i only have nintendo consoles (ds, 3ds, switch) rn but i want a decent pc at some point. the sims calls to me.
- Politics! my politics are very important to me as a leftist so if you're right wing we will not get along. if i find out that youre racist/homophobic/transphobic/a zionist (i am jewish)/sexist/etc i will probably block you. id say no hard feelings but i dint mean that.
I will probably update this as needed/whenever i remember to <3 ty if u read this and i love you have a great day
#im so sorry yona apologist post this is more important in my silly little mind#I AM STILL A YONA APOLOGIST SHE DID NOTHING WRONG#SHES MY WIFE AND I LOVE HER
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How would Issho/Fujitora, Doflamingo, Smoker, Arlong, and Gin react to their s/o dying in their arms? (human s/o for all of them including Arlong) Sorry there are so many the posts you've made so far I've enjoyed immensely. I love your style of writing! (:
I know it’s been *checks notes* actual years since I have touched this blog, but I kinda wanted to try my hand at a few of the asks I have in my inbox. I’m going to do just Smoker, and with each of the asks with multiple characters I will pick the one I am most comfortable with writing and go from there. I hope you like it! And also, to anyone who reads this and likes it, thank you! But my ask box will remain closed until…idk, probably a long time. I don’t want to get any one’s hopes about about anything.
Pairing: Smoker x GN!reader
Warnings: Angst, character death (you asked for it), mild descriptions of injury, mentions of blood, implied smut (mildest of spice), unbeta’d if that is a warning
***
The OP was supposed to be a simple one. Get in, do reconnaissance, stay under the radar, come back with what info they needed on the pirate crew, get out.
No one thought Big Mom herself was going to recognize Y/N, because you were good at your job. You had been spying for the government for years, you’d worked with Smoker as one of his subordinates, had infiltrated countless pirate crews, revolutionary bases, treasonous scum that thought they could get away with anything, and had always succeeded in your job.
Lay low, go unnoticed, get the info, come back to him. It was a perfectly organized system that was like clock work, each gear turning for the purpose of civilian protection, and justice.
Until now.
Blood soaked the beach he was kneeling on, who’s it was, he had no idea. Could be his, was probably the pirates’ that were scattered around the Vice-Admiral like debris after a storm, but what infuriated him most was it was most definitely yours.
Wheezes, broken and wet, escaped from your lips, swollen eyes looking up into stoic grey that was like looking into twin hurricanes. Anger, righteous and intense, swirled around with frustration, concern, grief, and an emotion you knew from your quiet moments between soft sheets and the hard planes of his body.
So gentle you barely felt it, he lifted you from the sand like something precious, your blood dripping down his arms and pooling beneath your broken body. Your eyes, swollen and bruised, squinted up at him and a soft smile cracked painfully across your lips.
“Hey handsome” you rasped, a cough that was soaked with blood spurting out. Smoker put a large hand through your matted hair, jaw clenching as he tightened his hold on you.
“I’m gonna get you to the ship’s infirmary” he seethed through his teeth, the usual multiple cigars he kept there like pacifiers long gone. He made to get up, but the cry that came from your lips was shrill and heartbreaking. He immediately stopped, holding you to his chest in a hold soft enough for a newborn.
“I know it hurts, but you need-“
“Do you remember Alabasta?”
Smoker stopped, looking down at your broken body that had the audacity to be giving him the smile that always managed to make his heart flutter in his chest like a crushing school girl’s. He swallowed thickly, not trusting his voice and opting for a nod.
“You were such a baby about Strawhat, I thought you were going to implode when he had his crew mate save your life.” You reached a trembling hand to his face, stroking the rough stubble of his jaw. Almost involuntarily, Smoker leaned into the soft touch, turning his head to kiss your palm as memories of their time on the desert island came to mind.
It had been the first time you had ever yelled at him, calling him reckless and blind. Telling him you were thankful for Strawhat, grateful he had saved his “stupid, sorry, ass” so you had the chance to give him a piece of your mind. He had retaliated with a practiced speech about being your superior, about how you should worry more about your job than what he was doing, how you shouldn’t talk to him like that.
Then you had the nerve to yell at him that you didn’t have a choice but to worry about him. When he yelled at you back about the why, instead of answering him you kissed him square on the mouth.
Their first kiss was in the moment, it was all teeth clacking and sudden and Smoker had been blindsided, but also hadn’t been. The two of you had been flirting with the line between officer and government agent for months at that point, subtle glances and bold, shameless flirting on your part had morphed into soft and subtle touches and hours of listening to you talk about everything and anything.
When the shock of it had worn off a second after you started kissing him, he hadn’t expected for himself to kiss you back. He had adjusted your chin, softened the kiss, and wrapped his arms possessively around your waist and lifted you, your legs wrapping around his own waist in a way that sent chills down his spine as he carried you to his desk. He set you down upon it, gentle as can be, but your legs stayed around his waist, his hips grinding into yours in a way that had him growling. Your lips had been like soft, plush, velvet on his own chapped ones, tongue sinful in its exploration, running against his to beg for entrance.
The two of you broke apart, you were panting, your face flush as you put your head on his chest and listened to the quick thumping of his heart. He smelled like a cigar, a hint of sweet fruit in a haze of earth and smoke that always managed to make your head spin. A smile tugged at the corners of your mouth as you licked the taste of him from them.
“I worry about you because I care about you Smoker” you looked up at him, your eyes twinkling in the soft glow of the sunlight coming in through the porthole of his cabin “probably more than what’s appropriate for a working relationship, but I don’t want to hide it anymore.” You put your hand on his face, stroking the apple of his cheek in a way no one had ever dared touch him before “if you don’t want this though, we can stop right now and never talk about it a-“
Smoker was kissing you again, softer but with a passion that turned your whole body into jelly that molded into his. It was brief, too brief for your liking but he was looking at you with a smoldering gaze that promised more.
“We do this, we tell no one.” He said with conviction “I can’t have my subordinates thinking I have favorites, and fraternizing could get me and you in a lot of trouble.”
You nodded, understanding alighted in your eyes as you coyly bit your kiss swollen bottom lip.
“If that means I get to see your smoke powers at work in the bedroom, I’ll take an oath of silence”
He felt his body react, his hardened length against your thigh making you squeeze your legs together, bringing him impossibly closer.
Smoker’s chest tightened at the memory.
“I’m glad” you said, swollen gaze growing distant “that it all happened the way it did. The last year and a half has been the best of my life” another cough, violent and cracking in its intensity that it had you whimpering into Smokers chest, and his eyes were burning with the tears that were inevitable now.
“Y/N-“ Smoker started, the deep rumble of his voice cracking “baby, you’re gonna be fine, let’s just-“ he took a breath, steeling himself to try and lift you up again, but your head falling limp against his chest stopped him, made the breath leave his lungs and, for the first time in a very long time, Smoker felt true terror grip his careful self control.
“Y/N?” His voice, so unlike the commanding bass it usually was, soft and broken as the body he held “Y/N? Sweetheart c’mon, wake up” he shook you, your head lolling to one side and then the next awkwardly, before it rested back on his chest and Smoker realized your uneven breathing had stopped, the rasping, painful breaths gone quiet and the only sounds to be heard on the bloodied beach were Smoker’s own uneven hyperventilating “Y/N please! You-you can’t do this! Baby, c’mon-open those pretty eyes, please! Y/N? Y/N!”
He held on tight to your body as he slowly broke down, the tears running rivers down his face that had smudges of your blood on it from holding your body up to it, his face buried into your hair as if he could revive you if he held on a little tighter, begged a little harder to whatever god or devil would listen. His cries broke through the silence, their only companion the lapping of water against the sand and gore. He rocked back and forth, clinging to your lifeless body like it was the only thing keeping him tethered to the earth.
That was how Tashigi found her Vice-Admiral, sobbing into your hair as he begged you to wake up. Her heart shattered into a million pieces, but she had to keep him moving, had to remind him of the duty he still held.
“Vice-Admiral Smoker?” She breathed, caution in her tone, heartbreak threatening to pull her under when his breath caught. He looked up at Tashigi with a tsunami of emotions that she had never seen him display. Heartbreak and grief worked in tandem to make the ever stoic and statuesque officer crumble to his knees.
“I’ve gathered the survivors of our platoon, we’re awaiting your orders, sir”
There was a pregnant pause that seemed to stretch for an eternity, Smoker looking down at his dead lover, the emotions that had been raging across his face draining from his being, and was replaced once again with the careful stoicism that his position required of him.
He got up slowly, you still cradled against his chest as he looked out at the horizon. It was another long moment before he spoke.
“We bury our dead, then we take the fight to the one who started this.” There was a fury in his words that struck fear into Tashigi, a fear for how reckless her Vice-Admiral was about to be against a Yonko.
“But Smo-“
“Did I fucking stutter?” He whipped his head around, the grey of his eyes burning with an unbridled rage that seemed barely contained “I’m not gonna rest until every last piece of filth that carries the name of Charlotte are wiped from every ocean from the East Blue to Raftel.” He glanced down at the body in his arms, a soft, broken look before the rage hit again.
“They’re gonna pay for what they’ve taken, I’ll make sure of it personally.”
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...hold on, hold the FUCK on...
...an anime featuring a lesbian couple front and center for a mecha series where, and this is the part I need to be 100% clear on:
TᕼᕮY ᗪOᑎ'T ᗷᑌᖇY Tᕼᕮ GᗩYS?!?!
EDIT: After having been properly educated (by both the OP and my GF, who wasn't happy with me for getting into an argument on the Internet in the first place let alone on something I was flat-out wrong about), I've promised to give Gundam another try, starting with Witch from Mercury. I'll probably be doing a "live react" or something on a Tumblr post or something. And because it must be said as publicly as I made an ass of myself: I'm sorry to OP and I'm sorry to the fandom for running off assumptions in the heat of the moment.
(This, at least, will give me something to do instead of sit in the dark and cry over the fact that my GF is leaving going back to her hometown for a month and probably never coming back because everyone leaves me eventually and I'll probably die alone ...maybe I have issues.)
Anyway, much like my issue with Warhammer 40k, I allowed myself to be completely blinded to the actual content of the IP by dudebros who gave me a completely inaccurate picture of the property. This is the dudebro's fault for being douche-bags about it and my fault for believing them, not the fault of the actual Gundam fandom or the property itself.
Why not just delete the post? Two reasons; first, it's already escaped confinement and second I don't believe in deleting stuff I've posted just because it's wrong. It feels disingenuous to me, like I'm trying to hide it and lie about it. I'd rather people find the original straight from the source with apologies or corrections (like this one) than have a game of hearsay telephone happening with possible out of context screenshots.
I've been deliberately avoiding this series because...well, it's Gundam. If there ever was a series that was overhyped it's Gundam, but mostly because it's a progressive march of fuckboys in penis compensation machines saving the day because Reasons™ and you're telling me The Series for Cis-Het Dude Protags has two lady queers front and center AND THEY DON'T KILL THEM OFF?!
I mean, okay, okay...backing up here...maybe I'm jaded. It took me 20+ years to find out there's a playable faction of women characters in Warhammer 40k because I couldn't see past the neo-fascist fanboys who have hard-ons for a zombie emperor. Maybe all I'm seeing are the wannabe otaku who saw one (1) series of Gundam and decided it was the Best Mecha Anime Ever and are just four-bajillion forms of annoying about it.
Maybe I've been watching from the sidelines as the "Yes Lesbians!" vs. "No Lesbians!" factions lob grenades at each other without ever talking about whether these two protagonists even have a story arc.
But for the LOVE of all that is good and pure would you people start TALKING ABOUT WHETHER THE GAYS GET BURIED OR NOT?!?! (EDIT: See below) I grew up as a closeted queer in the 80s! I've had buried gays up to my eyeballs! I tune out any media that features any hint of homosexuality until it's spoiled for me with the announcement that "The Queers Live!"
The elder queers are dying of thirst here! We've gotten accustomed to drinking from the poisoned well of 'bury your gays' because it was all we had for DECADES...no, centuries!!!
Please, please say the important part out loud! Tell us up front that the sweet queer couple in the series aren't killed off or married off in some hack-writer way to get rid of the queers!
EDIT: I understand that my lack of clarity was, once again, me falling into the dudebro's traps and not paying attention to what people actually said, and clearly people in the Gundam fandom, esp. the queer parts of it, have been saying it right up front for some time. The meta-message I was going for remains valid, even if my application of it to this particular franchise was wildly off-base. Please create content where the queers live, we don't want to bury our gays anymore.
I mostly think this poll is hilarious (and some people are taking it way, way too seriously) but it’s starting to get really weird how often people on the opposite side are dismissing Gundam — a giant of science fiction that remade a genre in its image — and quite literally lying about Suletta and Miorine. I’ve seen people claim they were canonically married to men, people claim the show’s ending was rewritten by interns, claim they never hugged, and other claims regarding them not being canon.
While Bandai and Kadokawa did censor one interview, and Bandai released an “open to interpretation” statement, these no longer hold true. Official material has henceforth referred to them as married. One instance of censorship and a statement they’ve clearly walked back on does not erase the fact that the show itself heavily emphasizes their wedding rings, refers to Miorine as Eri’s sister-in-law, and makes it abundantly clear that they are married.
“I knew I was going to make an epilogue, but it was a while before I decided upon the exact number of years that should pass in-between. The ending itself follows “The Tempest,” and depicts Suletta and Miorine getting married and becoming partners.”
- Hiroshi Kobayashi
They are completely and unambiguously canon, and arguably were never decanonized to begin with given the literal text of the show.
An addendum to this: I’ve also seen a strange dismissal of the history that G-Witch pulls from.
The original Gundam inspired Revolutionary Girl Utena, with Lalah Sune in particular (the creator of an iconic Gundam archetype) serving as the inspiration for Anthy Himemiya. Gundam has had a queer fanbase for decades, and has had gay characters (with Yoshiyuki Tomino himself confirming this) since the 1990s.
G-Witch draws from Gundam’s extensive, genre-shaking history, classics like Utena and Rose of Versailles, and Shakespeare’s The Tempest. It brings Gundam and Utena’s connection full circle, and is in conversation with every Gundam series that came before it.
It’s unfair to dismiss it as just some random show, or — as I’ve seen some do — credit its open queerness to the influence of completely unrelated American media, as if Japan is utterly devoid of gay people.
#i seriously thought one of them died in the end#because that's Just How These Things Go#and nobody ever said otherwise
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Momdad I am very sorry to bother you but I don’t know what to do. TW for medical stuff, death, and potential medical neglect
I had surgery just under a month ago and because of my chronic health conditions my recovery has been slower and more painful than typical, which I knew it would be. I was told that I just had to take Advil and Tylenol. When I explained that that wasn’t helping I was given a script for physical therapy, which I will try even though when I’ve had surgery before it has made things much worse not better. But then I had to have blood work done post surgery and my liver is doing some weird things, so the doctor wants me to stop taking Tylenol to see what that does. When I said that if I did that I would be in too much pain because my pain was already at a 7-10 I was told to try ice and a heating pad which I’ve already been doing. I just don’t know what to do. I can’t get my heart rate under 100 even laying down because of my pain and heart condition, I can’t get out of bed, and I’m in too much pain to eat. At this point I’d rather let my liver kill me and idk what else to do because all my doctors are not listening to me
oh sweetheart, i am so fucking sorry. this absolutely medical neglect and you have every damn right to feel as horrible as you do. you just had surgery, you should be on opioids to manage the pain. that is what opioids are for. it is fucking reprehensible to leave your patient with literally no pain relief post surgery.
i get so fucking angry over the opioid backlash. yes, addiction is a problem, but you shouldn't fucking punish pain patients because of someone else's problem. it is malpractice to offer zero opioids post-op, oh my god.
i don't blame you for feeling this fatalistic about everything, but is there any other doctor or staff member you can call, or have someone call for you? make it clear you are being denied post op pain relief and that you want to comply with the instructions you're given to go off tylenol and attend physical therapy, you are not capable of getting out of bed in the amount of pain you're in.
i know that we're trained not to complain and not to ever, ever sound like we're drug seeking, but to be perfectly frank, what do you have to lose? if you're honestly contemplating just letting yourself die, you have no reason not to be loud and push as hard as you can for someone to just listen to you and help you. when your life is what we're talking about, you should raise holy hell with everyone you possibly can before you just give up.
but with that said, i also have to recommend that you try a natural liver supplement - namely, an herb called milk thistle. now, milk thistle isn't going to cure liver disease or anything like that, clinical trials have had mixed results, but it has traditionally been used for liver troubles for a long time. i also take high doses of acetaminophen and i take milk thistle daily to try and counter the effects, and i've never had any liver problems turn up. i've also taken this liver extract, dandelion, turmeric, and i drink kombucha twice a week to try and shore up my liver health. it's not going to cure jaundice, but it seems to help.
i know this is a horrible situation, and believe me, i fucking understand pain. i've been in pain for more than a decade straight. i've thought about just dying to escape it. but what you're going through right now can still be a temporary problem, and you can still have life worth living on the other side of it. no matter how dark things seem right now, and i know it feels bleak as hell, you can still hold on to see what happens.
i don't want you to give up and die, sweetheart. i know you wouldn't want me to give up and die either. please try to contact someone and make some noise about how your needs aren't being met, okay? i wish i could give more detailed advice than that, but maybe one of my followers has a better idea than me. you should also send a message to @heyatleastitsnotcancer, as she's gone through many surgeries and had to deal with a lot of substandard post-op care.
in that vein, make sure you're connected with other disabled folks. you need support from people who get it and are there to offer encouragement and suggestions. i'm glad to be one of them, but you need a network. maybe start with @spooniestrong and find some others through there.
just don't give up yet, sweetheart, please. you can get through this.
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Hello Mädch ahsdjaksdh <3 !!
how is college going? dw, I hope you are settling in super well and feeling optimistic about school and all the amazing things I know you are going to achieve this year! I am excited that you are starting your rotations now! you are going to do awesome, I know it! I'm sorry that you didn't get that ICU first like you wanted but hopefully it's all part of the plan so that you get it at the right time for you <3 let me know how they go, of course. I hope they go super well.
the week has been a bit weird to be honest, in my team I had a semi argument that was properly tense for the first time with someone and it was just so unpleasant. you know those people where they aren't horrible but you know that you'll never completely see eye to eye with them? i think it's just one of those things, where we'll never just completely read each other or get each other? and it's not, like, a massive issue or anything that we can't deal with, but I feel like usually I get on really well with people or not at all (all or nothing person I guess haha) but with this person I've just got to admit that we're always going to be a bit in the middle? like, we talked it over, and I've still found sometimes we misunderstand one another? so things are still good in work and clients, but with workpeople it has been the more difficult battle? hopefully we should get some more cool media stuff with the K-pop people soon, so that's an up?
OMGsh your coworkers are so much older than you! [lease do post a picture of your room, I am 100% confident that you have made it so dreamy and pretty. Thank you sm for telling me more about these operations though! I feel like everywhere is on red alert at the moment when it comes to health and care and making sure that people look after themselves and not put others at risk, you know? the doctors that to talk to me about my potential surgeries too have said the same but it's nice hearing it from a friend, you know? so thank youuuu <3 <3
I was the same as you, I would get so so so anxious and stressed if I wasn't studying or working or anything like that? but my mum is like your mum and grandma, where she gets up early too! but I feel like I need to do the late night thing instead? but then once I got into this crazy spiral where I would wake up really early and go to bed really late and like nap in between so I ended up like having two hours of sleep either side? that was peak wth at the time haha XD so now I try and let myself wake up a bit later really XD ha ha I'm in barely adulting! like I work so much but I don't earn a lot ha ha – I don't think that's very effective adulting? or like, I don't know I guess for a lot of people my age there's a work hard and hope it pays off thing in certain industries? so you're definitely more effectively adulting than me right now! like, you're going to do stuff that's gonna actively help people and you'll see that right in front of you, you know!!? sometimes my work gets out there but I rarely see directly if it gets to make peoples lives better you know? so the path you're on is so so admirable <3 <3 <3
I get you though, do you find that you thrive under the pressure even though it's sometimes a lot? I find that sometimes it does help me, but sometimes I forget to identify the times when it isn't helping me? or, sometimes I take it too far? so please look out for yourself and take care of yourself <3 and when you're worried if you're on the edge know that it's enough for you to take a rest and not be super perfect. i sometimes tell myself to except that I'm probably gonna make two or three stupid mistakes a day? It sounds kind of silly but it means that it makes it easier for me to accept when I mess up, idk, I think it helps me balance the pressure sometimes? i 100% understand what you're saying - at school do they have people that can directly help? or like peer supporters so it's not as stressful or official feeling as a therapist? if you ever want me to come off anon to help lemme know <3 i'm always here for you <3
oh my gosh your grandparents have been able to live long too! all my grandparents lived close to 100 before passing, and one of my grandmothers had the same as your grandfather. he sounds so sweet and so kind though! i love that he knows how to FaceTime you! Some of my aunts and uncles still don't properly haha. it sounds like he knows that he's super loved though, he's very lucky <3 <3 i've been thinking about all this really lovely stuff and how it grounds you when stuff like careers can stress you out and feel like the most important thing when it shouldn't be? what are the personality differences between the different areas of the US? my East Coast friends seem to straight talk a lot more than my West Coast friends? like they're a lot more realistic as opposed to being, I don't know laid-back or if not laid-back sometimes just more comfortable with superficial stuff? Not like my West Coast friends are superficial people, but I think they accept it as part of the world a bit better? my friends on the east coast will rail against that stuff a lot more, like they buy into the influencer bullshit less? but I guess these are all sweeping generalisations anyway... I might have to travel a bit in europe soon... I got asked to go to otaly for some work today, and to holland next month. Idk if it will end up happening though, things change all the time? I have to keep checking quarantine rules all the time with countries! but YAY and YES Europe tour trip one day :D !!!!!!!
you know what? when I first saw you compare bowling and golf I was like, wait, what? but now I totally get it! i know a golfer and they talk about how physical and strenuous it is on the arms and stuff all the time which I don't think always comes across when you watch it and it makes a lot of sense with how you describe how you trained for bowling! i used to cox in rowing and I always used to find it really funny that I said that was the sport I did because honestly I just sat in the boat all the time and steered XD
obligatory YES WTF ARE COTTON SCENTS! quite a few shops in the city where I live have been closing down because of Covid but our Jo Malone is still going strong! I love that lots of already classic clothing shops have now gone out of business but for some reason the people where I live cannot live without their perfume XD I think I'm gonna go in later this week or next week to take a look! with all this travelling I kind of want to buy something new? also, my hands have been acting up with injury so I have to rest my hands more anyway – so might as well look for perfume right? do you have any recommendations or would the blueberry one you've just gotten be at the top of your list?
the exciting thing is that I'm doing a bit less this week! I need to wait and see if that job wants me to fly out to Italy within the next 48 hours, if not next week, but if not I think I'm gonna figure out how to rehabilitate my joints a bit and get my brain okay? It's been existential Covid crisis week haha - I think a lot of me and my friends have been feeling like we've lost so much of our lives and potential during this time and I've really tried to hold in and ignore it for the past 18 months? i'm not one to ever feel lonely or to really really want to be in a relationship like some of my friends, but I've just been feeling it this week? like, I love my independence, but I wouldn't say no to a boyfriend right now you know? I feel silly saying that sometimes because I'm so against feeling like you have to have someone in your life to be okay, but I guess that's just a result of how the world is has been recently?? but I think all my feelings exploded around this stuff now so, I am trying to get back into a better place? so it's not as exciting as some of the stuff I've told you about before, but it's what's up I guess?
how are your mum and grandmother doing? are they doing good? [lease send all my love to them too. I'm glad these help you reflect on your week! they do with me too and I'm always happy to hear from you, no matter how long you might need <3 <3 hope you manage to reward yourself for working so hard these past days and that you remember you're always doing 110% so you deserve the best!
love you lots and lots - 💥
ANGEL HELLO !!!!!!!!! i told myself i would stay on top of this and swear in a timely manner but ;_____; a full week + 2 clinical rotations later here i am on a sunday, it seems this is always the case :( maybe my get back to you day will only be on sundays LOL i will try my best in the future babe, but ofc thank you so much for being patient with me <3
uni is going fine so far hun !!!! i've started clinical rotations as i've said on thursday and friday, and then my first exam is on tuesday so i read some chapters yesterday so i'm not squished for time lol :) and ,,,, what you said "hope it's all part of the plan" is very much my way of thinking lol wha is your sign? i'm a sagittarius and that's like, a philosophy i go by like everything is how it's supposed to be even if it's not what u want like everything will work itself out :') i'm wondering if we are one in the same !!!!! <3
and omg ;_____; conflict within the workplace is NEVER easy bc all everyone wants is to reach the goal you all are reaching and bc there's some bumps in the road it makes everything that much more stressful :( and i know exactly the type of person you are talking about LOL i've had to work with some of my peers in the hospital who really didn't treat me all that nicely , but i still have to partner up with them anyways bc we had to move a patient lol ; like they never do anything terrible to you but you just cannot come to a proper agreement with them? i know the feeling :( but i can tell you are doing ur absolute best ;_____; it's a tough situation ,,,,,,,,, but may i propose something ??? maybe since things are high stress in the workplace, would u be willing to meet them outside the workplace, like a quick coffee meet up and then discuss those issues? maybe talking about it in the work environment is way too stressful for both of u and it is hard to come to an agreement, but maybe in a calmer, more informal setting do u think maybe the both of u could be like "hey, what u were talking about i'm not really head over heels for but this is what i think and do u think we can do something where both of us will be happy?" im thinking maybe will opening up a means for more civilized discussion?? just a thought LOL :') let me know how it goes :( i hope u are all able to figure everything out !!!!!
about the surgeries !!!!! like i said i know it's super stressful to think about bc this is one of the very few times in life where things are absolutely out of our control and that scares us, and we as medical providers aren't supposed to give u a false sense of security, but i promise u everything will be just fine as long as u correctly follow up with care post-op :) we wouldn't want an infection !!!! >;( i remember last year i had a patient and she was going in for a routine colonoscopy and she was scared shitless ,,,,,,, but i was like "listen ma'am i know it can seem scary but i was just in there with the doctors and everything is super relaxed and they know what they're doing in there, you'll be out in no time and i'll be here waiting !!" and that seemed to help her a lot, after the surgery she was on me like flies on shit LOL she was like "THANK U HONEY" (but i think most of it was bc she was still drugged up hhh)
LOL us with our family members waking up early <3 literally this morning i decided to do my laundry at 8am (its only 10 right right now lol) but idk it just make u feel a little bit better doesn't it? but oh my gosh no i don't see u in this way at all ;_____; babe like you're already THERE in the world working and to me like ,,,,,, being an effective functioning person in society is like all i ever want i just want to be COMPETENT and the fact that u manage ppl ???? it's already a lot of responsibility but you do it everyday like you go to work u make food for yourself u pay bills like yes this all kinda sucks but you're there doing it and idk ,,,,,,,, like u being in this position is like yeah their surviving in the world and doing okay !!!! so that’s how i see u hun ;_____;
and i don’t think i necessarily thrive under pressure but i just kinda ,,,,,,, handle it?? like i think i handle my stress quite well !!! i think the reason why making mistakes scares me so much in my field is bc if i make a mistake i can like, kill someone or seriously harm them if i do something wrong SLKDFJ but i have to remember i’m still just a student and a lot of the things that i’ll learn won’t even be in these last few months of nursing school, but rather during my months of orientation on the floor i’ll be working on when i finally land a job ,,,,,, i know i just have to be patient and kind to myself, but it’s hard not having these high expectations for myself bc everyone else pushes themselves super hard (nurses i mean) so i feel like i should be too , ya know? ;_____; it’s a hard balance that i’ve yet to find but hopefully once i graduate i’ll have just a little bit more confidence in myself :’)
and omg your grandparents lived a long life as well !!!!!!!! a lot of my friends’ grandparents are really young still, so it’s hard for others to relate i think LOL but :(((( i’m really lucky to have them around still and like, i feel like my grandparents are the cornerstone of our whole entire family; once they pass i’m not quite sure what will happen ;_____; so i’m just trying to cherish every moment that i have with them even tho sometimes it’s stressful lol ; also BOUT THE DIFFERENCES FROM EAST TO WEST COAST LOL ; i think u described it really well actually :) like among the friends u have the are from different parts of the states, it’s very accurate in my opinion !! and again after all it is just a very broad assumption, in general east coasters have this “workaholic” attitude, they tend to be very realistic which i actually appreciate a lot lol, i’m hoping to live near the east coast when i move out <3 now where i am from it is considered the midwest even tho it’s more east than west if u look at it on the map LMAO and like, it’s really funny bc if u say to someone you’re from the midwest they’ll tell u our reputation is being “too nice” LSKDLFJSKLD and like that’s our thing, a happy medium between coasts with big cities but small towns too and generally just very chill and nice ,,,,,,,, the south of the US is also known for having that “southern hospitality” overall very cheerful ppl with personality and super kind attitude on life :) now the west of the US i’m not saying there aren’t nice ppl out there bc there are LOL but esp near lost angeles or hollywood ofc you’re going to have ppl very stuck up bc ya know they made it to big bad LA and they want to be trendy with all of the fake health shit (celery juice does NOTHING FOR U sorry lol) generally my view of the west is just very fake and i would never want to have my family grow up there LMAO but that generally like, california and washington but like, utah or wyoming or colorado are just absolutely gorgeous and they have small town ppl there bc there are a lot of ranches there ,,,,,,,, does any of this make sense to u ??? KLASFJ
i’m going to skip a few paragraphs bc this is so long already LMAO but trust me i’ve read everything so far lol ; it seems like you’re doing a lot of traveling !!!!!! <3 i’m so jealous !!!!!!!! italy sounds so beautiful i would love love to go some day :( ALSO U SMELLED THE BLUEBELL PERFUME RIGHT ???? U LIKED IT ?????? doesn’t it smell absolutely divine??? no matter how many scents i smelled after that i knew it was the right one for me ldkfsdlkfj <3 i’m still so in love with it ;____; also about ur lil rant about feeling lonesome :( bub i can really relate to this and i feel the same way like my mom and the rest of my family never pushed me to meet anyone and i’ve always never had a problem making friends, but like, as i’m older and i realize i’ll be alone a lot more of my time once i graduate like i really do want to share my life with someone :( i have a lot of love and i want to be able to show it to someone i care about a lot but i just never really take the initiative to do that bc quite honestly i’m not confident in myself lMAO so ,,,,,,, i know we never feel like we need to be dependent on someone but sharing experiences with someone who feels very strongly for u seems nice, doesn’t it? i wish this for both of us really soon okay?? <3 i tell my friends i would LOVE to be engaged right now lskdjfslfjs :’)
but anyways !!!!!!!! my mom and the rest of my family is doing well <3 and i’m doing okay too !!!!!! i don’t want to bore u with how clinicals are going but if u want me to tell u just let me know LOL and angel i know i say it all the time but always thank u so much for being patient with me okay? u are the absolute best !!!!!! also as promised, here are a few pics of my dorm room LOL it’s a shoebox but it’s my shoebox :) enjoy !!!!!!
#asks#💥 anon#my dorm is the oldest one on campus so :’) it looks a little ugly but I try my best MXJDJD#ignore the popcorn bag on the side :)#also peep the jo malone perfume LOL
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Maybe it's just me overthinking but people these days tend to fit characters in certain tropes and nothing else outside of that..the mere idea of a soft spoken person being dominant does not fit with their tropes in the same way that a character with questionable morals is easily reduced to either dom daddy or entirely babygirl..
As someone who's only been playing this game for a month, I really don't see Xavier as a sub. Like from the moment he's introduced, there's a sense of authority, confidence and calm air about him. This, I say, as an ENG Dub player.
I did try the JPN Dub for a while because well, that's my default for anime and other games with multi audio..But for this game I prefer his ENG Dub voice more. Its so soothing 😩🤌
I think his willingness to go along with MC's shenanigans and his gentle manner of speech is reduced to “soft babie boy” lol
To me, he comes off as the most aloof amongst the LIs. Its like he's considering all his actions with MC, and always trying to hold himself back/keep his emotions in control..(which is why his kiss card felt the most wild to me cause he finally took that step and let loose instead of holding back).
It can get annoying because I've literally seen some dumbasses (no offense) on youtube and IG saying that Xavier won't stand a chance against Sylus in a 1 Vs 1 fight because he's apparently “soft, baby, kitten,” etc. lol 😆
and like i understand preferences and glazing your favs but..no offense to your Mafia Daddy but Xavier was out there giving hell to the entirety of N109 Zone and god knows what factions/gangs have beef with him..FFS Lumiere's sword cleaves the fabric of space open with one slash..Lumiere was seen destroying at the top of a building in N109 destroying protocores like he was setting off fireworks..
Like y'all can call me biased or whatever but the one character who's been fighting all his life, its Xavier and for someone to say he won't stand in a fight is just them looking at media with their headcanon glasses on, and no comprehension whatsoever.
There's also alot of misconceptions about Rafayel but I'm thinking of making my own post for that.
Sorry for ranting on yours OP 🙏
I saw you post about Xavier's personality. Could you explain what is the main difference between each dub?
I can only speak regarding my thoughts for the JP and EN as they’re the only languages I’m fluent in among the ones available in LADS!
in the EN dub, xavier’s tone is baseline very gentle. the cadence of his voice is almost always soothing, and even when he’s angry, he sounds very graceful and the language he uses is still quite proper
in the JP script, xavier sounds very self-assured and confident, almost to the point of being aloof. however, he is still extremely endearing, but only in select moments, and only to mc. he’s so absolutely cold to jeremiah but it’s played for laughs! this means, his baseline tone, even on normal conversations with mc, is very confident. i’ve said it before, he talks to mc like how an older boy would be speaking to a younger girl, or how a boyfriend would address their girlfriend. he is not rude, but he is not polite—this is something i have to point out over and over, because when people describe xavier as docile i feel like i have to draw the line because not only does it not match his characterization—there is a reason why xav isn’t submissive. it’s because he is royalty, and he commands respect. the jp dub shows this personality more, especially when he’s angry. he literally sounds like he’s going to burn the entire place down (no joke) when he adapts an angry tone in jp. also the way he talks to jeremiah is so obviously of someone who is used to ordering other people around (but endearingly because we know he loves jemmy)
anyway there are really a million things to say about how stark some of the differences are— but I do understand why it’s difficult to be consistent with this!there are certain nuances that only exist in the jp language and culture and the jp localization team is definitely fitting seiya into the cool jp boyfriend trope so it can appeal to the fans (and my gosh it is working!!!)
i could comment on specific cards in general if you’d want to know more OP but as for a general comment this is what I can say :)
#I'm sorry OP but your words got me..thank you for this post#I'll talk about Xav and Raf misconceptions later on i my own posts..#xavier love and deepspace#love and deepspace
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