#some ppl can't donate right now but will be able to help in future .. for this reason its important to keep spreading links | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

our-queer-experience · 8 days ago

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Sorry for shoving this rant-like mess in your ask box, so feel completely free to ignore it if you want. I'm mainly looking for advice but if you don't want to/can't give any that's perfectly fine (and I'm aware I'm not entitled to your time or a response).

I'm in high school (junior) and don't have a car or job. I live in the suburbs and don't have the means of getting anywhere unless my parents drive me, but I'm planning on getting my driver's license this summer, so I'll be able to go to in-person demonstrations, events, and protests. I'm also hopefully going to get a after-school job during my senior year. So basically, as of right now I don't have the means to donate to mutual aid requests nor am I able to do much outside of school. Im in my schools anti-hate club thing, but all we do is hang up anti-bullying posters, organize fundraisers, and plan assemblies (so all in-school related activities that don't have much consequence on larger problems). I'm in a very privileged position, being a middle class white person so I know I should be doing more to help. I was wondering if you had any suggestions on what I can do to better help the people around me/be a "good person"? I put together a spreadsheet a while back that I've been reworking in my free time to try and calculate how much money I could put towards mutual aid when I get a job in different situations (whether I make $13, $14, or $15 + whether or not I am enrolled in my local community college + whether or not I live on my own. I haven't planned any further than that), and have roughly concluded that I'll, hopefully (assuming my math isn't wrong and assuming my assumptions come true), be able to put forth $37-$184 per month in addition to attending demonstrations/protests/etc. But again, that's in the future, at least 5 months or so. For a few years now, I've been trying to at least educate myself and stomp out any internalized biases and bigotries and be a good ally to people I have privilege over, but there's always more to learn and I always feel like I'm missing something and being a shitty person. I understand there is no such thing as a perfect ally, but I'm always worried I'm doing something horribly wrong and I'm not even an imperfect ally (which, to be honest, I know I am because of my inaction). Even when I do start doing more via mutual aid and attending protests/demonstrations/etc, I feel like that's too little esp because I need to make up for my stagnation that I've had for the first 17 years of my life. For the past few years since I was like, idk, 13(?) when I became more "politically aware" or whatnot, I haven't really done anything other than reblog political posts and boost mutual aid requests. I read your post about ppl needing to do more bc that isn't enough (in relation to the UK passing a large anti-trans bill) so now I've been spending basically all my time thinking about ways to do better. I've spent the last 2 hours (it's now past 6am, whoops) trying to reword this ask to be less emotionally charged and trying to avoid coming off like "the reason I'm not a good person is because I can't be a good person :(((." I promise that that's not how I'm trying to come off. I've been trying to put a guide together for myself so I can be a better person, but I'm honestly really struggling with it because I'm always thinking about how I am undoubtedly missing something/there's no way I can be perfect/there might be someone who I otherwise agree with and respect over their beliefs and actions who might think I'm a horrible person/there might be inherent flaws in my logic/I might be completely missing the mark entirely with my entire belief system. Which, in all, is causing me to write this ask to try and get some advice.

Basically, overly complicated backstory out of the way, I was wondering if you had a guide or just general advice on what I should be doing, both now and in the future? If you see something wrong with my line of thought, please please please correct me (if you want) but also please be nice about it (as long as you believe I'm deserving of that respect. If I'm being completely bigoted and completely off the mark I'm aware im not entitled to that respect and it's completely fair if you want to cuss me out).

Thanks for taking the time to read this/sorry for the hassle.

i guess you have to stop looking at it like being a good persona and think more about what you can do for the world you live in. i get upset a lot about how performative a lot of activism is, but it already sounds like youre doing things in your local community. spreading awareness IS super important, your club does fundraisers, and you dont need to spend your money on causes like this. its encouraged and amazing but its not the end all be all, either.

i would highly recommend continuing to work in your local community. if you have anywhere local that needs help, like a rape crisis center or a homeless shelter, raising money or volunteering or donating what they need is always appreciated. you cant always fix everything elsewhere, but we can all try to fix things around us, and thats important too.

overall, wanting to get more engaged is super admirable! keep with that attitude and stay cool

#our queer experience #asks

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