#so weird it got me hoping hes 'just' officially leaving VIXX

[kpopchangedme]

Is he ok?? I came here to post about this.

bruh is Hyuk ok???????

[espship18]

Kpop ship for quentin anon

Howdy doody everyone! hah, we’re getting creative with intros now lol. Today, I have a ship for an anon who goes by quentin. If you are reading this quentin, 1) hello! and 2) I hope you enjoy <3 PS, I missed y’all :( 

Based off of your request, I gathered these facts about you; 

You are 5′6 and have brown hair and hazel eyes

You’re kind of introverted

But you like to let loose and have fun 

You’re friendly 

You have a monotone/expressionless expression not a bad thing!

You take no bs and always stands up for what’s right 

You love to laugh and you can be loud sometimes

You also love making others laugh

Your interests/hobbies are: drawing, writing, and dancing 

In your request you have been asked to be shipped with Day6, Got7, NCT, and VIXX! Let’s go shippin(I’m so sorry lol) 

Day6: Jae

The first thought I had for you and Jae was the famous ‘American Gothic’ painting by Grant Wood. Visually, you’d both have that expressionless look on your faces but in reality, you’re actually a happy sunshine couple. As I was thinking about how you two met, I thought you starting out as roommates would be so cute and clever. You would be new in the city, and the only apartment you could afford was Jae’s and he needed a roommate. The pieces all fit together perfectly. Based on first impressions, seeing all his amps and guitars and other musical items would be a little over-whelming, but he would assure you that you would never need to mess with anything or help him- he’s a big boy. Band practice would be a little hit and miss, sometimes they would be there, sometimes they wouldn’t, then if they were, you would leave so you can get a piece of mind. The first six months of living together would be awkward and you wouldn’t talk much. However, one rainy day when both your and Jae’s plans got canceled, you would start to bond, and you two would develop a relationship. As you two would get to know each other, you two would see each others humors, and you’d see the best and worst in each other. You both would be so blunt with each other in the funniest ways, you would never take comments seriously. Slowly, as time would go on, your friendship would slowly transform into romantic feelings. Jae would be very soft for you, and you admired Jae in a way you could never fully explain, so eventually you two said you were together. You fit together like two peas in a pod and when you became official, it was very liberating. Your friends and Jae’s friends weren’t surprised, since you two fit together so well, it was a matter of time before they called it- they were all happy for you regardless. You two would also be a very domestic couple btw. Hear me out, cause this’ll sound crazy but, Jae is the best worst housewife ever. When Jae would try to do household stuff he would fail but if he wouldn’t try he would succeed. He wouldn’t be the best at cooking, but would be a really good baker. That means a lot of sugar which means a lot of random decisions, like teaching you how to play guitar. There would be a lot of screaming singing followed by that by the way. Pillow talk would be huge for your two as well! Lastly, I would like to talk PDA/affection. A LOT of hand holding. He would love the softness of your hands. He also would love to droop his arm over your shoulder, then you would hold it, you would look so comfortable, and adorable, like the king and queen you are.

Got7: Jinyoung

Much like my last ship went, there will be a lowkey theme to this ship: domestication. I don't know why I’ve been into themes recently, but it’s here. You two would be a soft couple that would love to admire one another. You two would also be an artsy couple. Rooting from a college type of au, Jinyoung’s art would be photography while your art would be writing, writing to your hearts content. Being the artsy couple you are, you two would spend so much quality time together! You two would also have your fair share of going out and being active and staying at the apartment together. Staying home isn’t always a bad thing either. You two are still equally as giggly and peppy with each other, so you two never have a dull moment and there are smiles and sunshine all around. I want to touch on quiet time real quick because I love the thought of it. Quiet time would include a lot of snuggles. Any kind of snuggles you can think of where you’re either laying on top of each other, or he’s snuggled to you, or you’re snuggled to him, SNUGGLES. Quiet time also includes you two working on your interests. While Jinyoung is on his laptop editing some pictures for his portfolio, you are right by him, jotting down the thoughts in your head, coming up with new ideas, or continuing another idea- the world is your oyster. Moving right along is date night. Park Jinyoung on date night is the best boyfriend material ever. If you’re at home, he sets up fairy lights all over the apartment, he cooks, and he gets a little dressed up. He wants to look clean for you, and just imagine forehead Jinyoung in this scenario #yesmama. Also, a little thing Jinyoung would love to do is slow dance with you. Then when you two go out, you got to so many different places- basically til you get tired and want to take a nap lol. Personally, Jinyoung would like to take you to your favorite places such as to eat or do an activity with. He would LOVE going out for karaoke, so of course you two would go out and do the stuff he enjoys too. You also have an amazing food taste, so who could argue with that, right? A lot of dinner topics include deep talks about what you want to accomplish separately and together, and you also love to talk about your futures together, a fan favorite. Then when you would get home, some major pillow talk sessions. These sessions would be more playful like small debates over how to toilet paper roll should go, a lot of giggles and smiles. Lastly more PDA. Gentle hands holding yours, he would handle you like you were made of glass. So many forehead kisses, and the sweetest eye smiles you’ll ever see.

NCT: Jaehyun

You and Jaehyun yet again scream such a soft puppy like love aesthetic and it’s hard not to uwu over it. Jaehyun is your sunshine while you are his flower, like, you to need each other. Jaehyun would be absolutely head over heels in love with you tbh, like this bub is going to FALL. You two are that type of couple that is a get and go type of couple, and the world is your oyster. Traveling would be your thing, Jaehyun would want to take you everywhere he possibly could. With his occupation being a huge help in your wishes to travel, you would get to tag along on trips and such, and you and Jaehyun would travel anytime he got free time tbh. And this is super cute, listen up. So, you two would keep EVERYTHING you would get from traveling. Whether it’s plane/bus tickets, post cards, souvenirs, and of course your pictures, everything gets saved. Everything that can be put in a scrap book goes in a scrap book. It would be super cute if you two would have little books dedicated to every trip, and you’d keep them nicely organized on a ship by date or by location. Keeping those scrap books are great for always reliving the memories you two shared. Then, if you two aren’t out and about traveling or on a date, Sunday’s are your golden days- specifically if they’re rainy or it’s winter. Those Sunday’s are your time to relax and cuddle, and you also take those Sunday’s to work on your scrap books! Jae is also the type of boyfriend that loves to take great interest in your interests. Another one of those Sunday’s include making cute little stories together. Jae would love to collab on little stories with you! Again, those rainy days are full of endless possibilities, so, if you or Jae have an idea, you best believe that you two are coming up with a full out plot and characters, and even getting as far as getting a chapter or two written down. And a lot of the time, those little stories get tossed into a notebook, and it’s always fun to forget about it then come back at a later time and find it again. Moving on, you and Jae wouldn’t necessarily have date nights. You two spend so much time together, that every time you’re together is like date night. Of course Jae will take you out on special occasions like anniversaries or birthdays, but making homemade pizza or take out it the best way for you two to go. And omg so many game nights! Card games are your shit, and tbh, UNO would get crazy. Lastly PDA wise, Jae is all about that hand holding and cheek and lip kisses. He also loves to hug you, all the time, so prepared to have a koala bear attached to you.  

VIXX: Hakyeon 

When I think of you and Hakyeon, you two would be the perfect wild and mild couple. Joking and cracking jokes is always a must by the way. You two have interesting senses of humor so, you two always are playfully picking on each other and being playfully sarcastic to each other. Part of that playful sarcastic antics you two would do is being overly-sensitive with each other. I know that sounds weird but hear me out. It’s super cute when you two pick at each other. Hakyeon would like to pick at your quirks- mostly because your quirks is what makes you unique and your quirks is also one of the many reasons why he loves you. When you playfully roll your eyes as he picks, Hakyeon would just smile at you and he would say “I love you”. It’s actually super soft at the end of the day tbh. And overall, Hakyeon is very considerate of you. Hakyeon is also a very protective boyfriend, and he will always make sure you know that as well. And he isn’t sorry about it either and you don’t mind it either, it helps you feel safe and wanted. Dancing together is your everything by the way. From Hakyeon teaching you a new dance to even learning new dance styles together, you two dance so much. Filming your dances together is also always a thing, you have a camera that is specifically for dancing. And it’s always fun to go back and watch those videos and seeing how much progress you’ve made since you started learning a specific dance. Also, you two are the king and queen of practice room antics. Teasing each other, pinching each others tushies(to be specific) is only the beginning. And of course, anytime you get to dance with Hakyeon’s fellow group members, you all stay in the practice for literally hours just dancing and goofing off. Learning the choreo and the boys love to pick at you, and then if you’re doing the choreo better than one of the members, you can see a roast fest in your future. Moving onto date night, date night is always a surprise with Hakyeon. Double or triple dates with your friends, or cute little pop-up dates like carnivals or little shopping trips- curtesy by your lovely boyfriend. Spoiling you is one of his specialties, he loves it so much. You’re his number one, so of course he would want to treat you like a number one. And, you are also as protective of him like he is to you. And tbh, Hakyeon would love that you are protective over him, you’re his little fire cracker. Lastly, PDA. He’s very hands on, he loves to have a hand holding something, he loves to know that you are around him. Back hugs, and forehead kisses, especially quick pecks, it’s a cute little detail enough to make an impact, because it would leave you in a flush. 

~STA

[rofics]

Hidden omega (Part 55)

Fandom: Bts (Got7 + Big Bang + B.A.P + Monsta X + Seventeen + Block B+Vixx+TVXQ+Exo) Who doesn’t love a good ensemble Pairing:  Namjoon x Everybody Genre: Smut/Fluff/Angst Au: Canon / Omegaverse au Length: 4.5k

Chapter 1 ! Previous Chapter ! Next Chapter !

TRIGGER WARNING:

This chapter deals with in depth discussion of anorexia and eating disorders, if this is not something you can deal with please don’t read it. I have put a more in depth summary that you can read and then skip this Chapter! Also researching this chapter I found out that South Korea only have 3 centers that treat eating disorders and none of them are specialist centers like you find other places. So I made up a center.

Namjoon liked figure skating even if he tried to hide it many times. He is a rapper of a hip hop focused group. Saying that he liked figure skating was not something that would be socially accepted, so he like so many other things buried it deep inside him.

When it became night and the rest of BTS was sleeping he would check the results of different tournaments. He would marvel as Yuzuru Hanyu and Kim Yuna broke records. He would be sad as Yuna announced her retirement, then marvel again as newer skaters like Evgenia Medvedeva and Shoma Uno rose and started to place as well.

He cheered for his fellow Koreans and sighed sadly when they failed since after Yuna’s retirement. It seemed that the Korean figure skating organisation no longer wanted to support their skaters, but still expected them to place as well.

And now he got to meet one of the skaters he had been cheering for. It was weird for Namjoon. He had meet so many of his music idols, but it was the first time he was going to meet somebody he had admired outside of music, in a sport he didn’t even feel that he was  allowed to like.

Himchan cocked his head slightly to the side looking at Namjoon. “You know her?”

“She is one of the upcoming skaters from South Korea,” his eyebrows furrowed, “and I guess we shouldn’t be surprised she is here. I am more surprised she is allowed to get treatment.”

Doctor Myung was quick at answering that. “She isn’t here officially. Luckily her family pack stepped in to make sure she was okay. As she will explain herself, her situation is complicated, and I trust none of you to talk about the fact she is here. It is important it doesn’t get out, even if it was her own choose to meet with you.”

They all agreed to it quickly, as idols the understood that some things were important for the public and their companies not to know. When they got into the room Dabin was sitting cross legged on her bed cleaning her skates while looking at what looks to be replays from the last grand prix.

She looked up at from her task and smiled. Her smile was friendly and nice and for a second it was weird to think that she was only 17. The way her body language was that of somebody much older, but then again Namjoon assumed that she probably had a lot more of the world's weight on her since she was a pro athlete. Just like they had as idols. “Hello.”

Sometimes Namjoon kinda amazed himself with how he could go from being a good leader, social onstage and stuff like that, to just being the most socially awkward person the world had seen. Basically his tone was totally off.

Luckily Dabin didn’t seem to care about that or she was as awkward as him as she raised her hand in a wave. The soft smile finding permanency on her soft features. “Hello.” Her voice was just like it was on tv, which yes Namjoon was being creepy he should stop that… he should actually really stop that.

Dabin didn’t look as scarily thin as Wangho had, or Namjoon himself had at first. She was around the same size as Namjoon was now just shorter. It was clear that she was still underweight just not underweight at the level where people would stop and stare in the streets.

Himchan took the chair next to her bed. “Reviewing competition footage?” He was good at making it sound like he actually had any idea what he was talking about.

Dabin nodded. “Since I can’t skate while I am here for a few days I keep to looking at footage while doing ballet in the training area.” She shrugged a little. “Doctor Myung told me why you were here, and I wanted to meet you since I think I get it on a level that some of the other in recovery don’t. I understand that sometimes getting healthy isn’t the best option for your career.”

Then it was Namjoon’s turn to sit down next to her. “But if getting healthy isn’t good for your career why are you here? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“I check in here a few times when I feel myself slipping into bad habits. Doctor Myung and the other doctors help me on the right track on to focus on not getting even worse. I know that I can’t end completely healthy as I want, but this way I can keep it somewhere in control. At first it was hard. My family forced me here during off season when I was just 15, but now it has gotten easier to ask for help. In the start it was like asking for help made me weaker, made me less… But now everybody here has taught me that asking for help is actually what makes your stronger.” In that moment Dabin looked many years older than she was supposed to, and what she said… what she said was something that Namjoon wish he had understood years ago.

But she wasn’t done speaking yet. “I spoke to Yuna-Noona and she told me about all her health issues recovering after stepping down from professional skating. I don’t want to be that person, she is only 25. I don’t want to have major health issues from things other than actual injuries from face planting the ice. I don’t want to look at myself at 25, look in the mirror and know that the way I trained and my eating pattern is going to haunt me for the rest of my life. Doctor Myung has been very helpful finding a good eating plan for me. While yes we both know it isn’t ideal, but it’s a lot better than the alternative.” She looked seriously at Namjoon.

“I don’t want to step out of line, but two of my sisters are very big fan of your music and look up to you guys a lot. I know I’m not a good role model for them and you guys will probably not have the option to have a perfectly healthy eating habits either, but try. A lot of young kids look up to you,” she looked a little sad at her statement as she looked down at her hands, “and getting help is okay we all need help at times.”

Namjoon felt a little sick to his stomach. He hadn't really thought to much about what impact his eating habits had on his fans. At times he still hard a hard time accepting that people were actually looking up to him. It was a weird thing. He knew that people tried to emulate idols and idol diets, but people had to know that starving yourself was bad right? But then again… he did it himself, and he should really know better shouldn’t he?

He looked over at Himchan that didn’t seem to comfortable either. Both of them really loved their fans they really did, and it was kinda messed up that people would try and do what they did. It seemed that fans had a big impact on both of them. Namjoon had started it because he wanted his fans to be proud of him, to know that he put work into it, that he deserved to be part of BTS. But now he felt bad for doing it because it could hurt his fans, this was all so mess up. His head was so confused.

Namjoon looked seriously at the young figure skater on the bed who also seemed to be a little uncomfortable with how none of them were saying anything.“You are right, I never thought about it like that. This started because I wanted our fans to be proud of me, because I wanted to prove that I was worth being in BTS. But I could be hurting armies because of this.”

Dabin for her had a soft smile on her face. “It hurts realizing that in wanting to be the best you could be, you instead turned out to be the opposite. Then knowing that if you correct it you won't be allowed to.”

She was very much like some idols Namjoon had meet over his time. Forced to grow up way before it was time for her to, it was almost weird to think about the fact that Dabin was only 17 she hadn’t even presented yet and she had figured all this out before Namjoon had. But instead of feeling bad about himself for it, he just felt sad for her. There was a reason that people under 18 were called kids, because they were. They shouldn’t be forced to be adults.

For the rest of the time they just casually talked. Dabin was as her public image showed a very nice a gentle girl. She clearly cared a lot about the people who had said they looked up to her. When they asked her what she hoped for in presentation and if she had any idea for a pack she just shrugged, explained that packs were different in sports than in music. When you were in a group that was very very likely to be the group for the rest of your life in music. But as a sport, even in group sports people's contracts could be sold to another country, she could get an offer to work in another country.

She explained that while affection was easy between people in sports, but everybody knew better than to try for permanent bonds. It was simply to hard. As Namjoon and Himchan stood up to leave Dabin stopped them and for once she looked like the child she was as she asked if she could have a picture with the three idols to show her siblings.

They were all three happy to comply since it was no secret for them that they were there, and Dabin would only show her family it. The quick selfie turned into a series of different increasingly weirder pictures shared between the four of them.

It was nice to hear Dabin laugh, and as they closed the door behind them leaving the young figure skater alone Namjoon turned towards doctor Myung. “Is she going to be okay?”

The doctor was hesitant to answer, but in the end he shrugged. “You probably know that figure skaters are riddled with injuries, but for her eating. It’s getting better as long she keeps caring for herself and have people in her life that cares she is going to be okay. At least that is my medical opinion, I hope you can understand why I choose to have you guys talk to her.”

It was Himchans turn to speak. “I didn’t know she was here while I got treated. You guys might be better at hiding people and secrets than our actual security team.”

Another shrug from the doctor. “It is fairly easy to hide something that the country refuses to admit we have a problem with anorexia. Nobody here especially the gossip mags want to admit that eating disorders are a real thing. There is a reason that we are the only specific center that treat it, which I am aware is a very sad sentence to say. Are you ready to meet some more people?” Doctor Myung’s voice was soft like the man would clearly understand if neither of the idols were ready to go on.

That was when Youngjae made himself aware as he wrapped his arms around Namjoon’s waist as the omega seemed the most shook by what they had seen. “It is okay to say no, we can come back another day or not comeback at all. It is not weakness to admit it is too much, don’t push yourself because you think it is the right thing to do.”

Himchan joined in resting a hand on Namjoon’s shoulder to show his support. The tall beta had a soft smile on his face that Namjoon was sure would match Youngjae’s face that was at the moment hid in Namjoon’s shoulder. He knew that nobody would judge him if he called it quit, if it was too much.

It took him only a moment to think it over before he answered. “I would like to meet the rest of the people here if it’s okay. I’m okay I really am. It has just left me with a lot of things to think about.”

Himchan looked a little hesitant, but then he nodded to show his agreement with Namjoon “if you think that is the best idea.”

For the next two hours they meet a lot of different people from younger than them to older. The one thing they had all in common was that they knew that something was wrong with them. They knew that they had to get better even if they were struggling with finding a way to get better. A Lot of them could tell stories like Wangho’s with struggling to eat and get better even if they knew they had to, that their mind was such a powerful force to hold them back.

Namjoon took selfies with all of them preparing to release them later when he had talked with their social media team since he knew better than to do anything like this without talking to them. He would be lying if he said that looking at young kids no older than 13 lying in beds way too big for the small bodies didn’t make him feel ill to his soul. But  Himchan and him tried their best to be nice and positive even if all the idols really wanted to do was adopt the kids and protect them from the world.

Just as he thought they had met the last person, a female beta a little older than Himchan that was there for the 4th time, but this time she was sure that when she was done she could stay out of center for the longest time.

Doctor Myung had explained to them that it was natural for some people to end up back at the center again. Since if they managed to recover and start eating like a normal person they could easily gain weight at a scary rate since they had completely destroyed their metabolism rate, which could scare them back into an eating disorder. They were told that when people had a set back like that it was important not to make them feel like a failure, but to help them as softly as you could back on the feet. Because if you shamed them, it was more likely that they would suffer in peace instead of seeking help.

Doctor Myung stopped them as they headed towards the exit, hesitating a little before he said what he clearly wanted to say. “I have one more patient that I would like for you guys to meet, but he is different from the rest.”

Namjoon’s brain went to the worst case scenario that he could think of. Half dead from brain damage, in a coma, more dead than alive. Every single possibly worse than the other. “Is he okay?”

Again the doctor seemed hesitant as he nodded. “Yeah he is for now, but we aren’t sure he is going to be for long. He is in denial, he thinks that he is okay, that nothing is wrong and that we are just being insane.”

So the logical part of Namjoon’s brain could understand why it was that Doctor Myung wanted them to meet this guy. Another part of his brain wasn’t sure if he was really ready to accept what he was going to see. He knew that he would be able to mirror himself in this person, even if he didn’t even know anything about him yet.

He wanted to run away like a scared child, he didn’t want to see what he was afraid of to be a mirror image of himself. It really fit well with the saying that the scariest thing in the world was one self. But Namjoon wasn’t a child, he was a grown ass adult. He knew that he couldn’t just hide from the thing he rather not see he had to grab himself by the bootstraps and pull himself up.“I want to meet him if that is okay.”

This time there was no hesitation in Doctor Myung’s voice. “I am happy that you say that.bI didn’t want to force any of you into something that you weren’t ready for, but I also wanted to show you how it sounds when people deny an eating disorder when you look from the outside and in.”

Namjoon could feel a soft hand being placed on his hip as to show him that he wasn’t doing it alone, and he didn’t need to turn around to know that it was Youngjae making himself known as Namjoon was still holding Himchan’s hand in his. Namjoon felt safe with the two betas. At first he hadn’t understood why Youngjae had found it so important that he himself should be there, as he now felt the light tremble in Himchan’s hand no matter how much the older beta was trying to hide it. Namjoon couldn’t stop himself from thinking

Youngjae was right in being here. Both Namjoon and Himchan needed his support even if neither was really ready to admit it. It also put it into perspective for Namjoon that there was no real ‘full recovery’ from an either disorder. It seemed to be something he would be struggling with for the rest of his life.

He smiled a little for himself. He was almost sure that if he managed to get a support system like Himchan had, the option wouldn’t be as scary as it did at that moment. He was almost completely sure that he would be able to do it, he didn’t know if that support system would be B.a.p or somebody else. But he hoped no matter who he ended up loving, they would love him despite all his flaws just as much as the rest of B.a.p loved Himchan.

As Doctor Myung showed them towards the room Youngjae stayed closer to them than he had all of the day. While yes the youngest beta had always made sure that his presence was known, he had also given the two older idols a respectful space so they could take in what really happened around them.

Now it was almost like the beta was in protective mode, like he took up the space as sub alpha with both of the real alphas not there. His scent of carnation was strong, but not unpleasant as it meshed with Himchan’s own scent of honeysuckle. Namjoon could smell a light hint of uncertainty in Himchan’s scent. But it wasn’t strong or out of order, and it was clear that he found a certain sense of calmness from Youngjae’s presence there. Betas really were the best if you asked Namjoon.

As the door to the room was opened, Namjoon wasn’t really sure what he had expected. Actually yeah he was sure what he had expected… another omega who would probably be half a head shorter than even Jimin and maybe even much younger as well with frail wrists that looked ready to snap of and dead ass set deep into an almost sunken face.

That was not the sight he was greeted with. It was instead an alpha leaning against a pillow with a scowl on his face. The alpha seemed to be just between Himchan and Namjoon in age his features seemed to hint at his origins being mixed and his height which would make him tower over even Namjoon seemed to support that idea. He was thin there was no way around it, but he wasn’t thin in the same way that Namjoon had seen other people at the center being.

If he was honest, if it wasn’t because he was in a center for eating disorders, he would probably have walked right past this boy… man and not thought about it. To be honest in Namjoon’s mind the man was pretty good looking. He wasn’t idol good looking and the scowl he was wearing did him no favours, but other than that he was good looking without a doubt.

“Hello?” Namjoon was hesitant as he said his hellos, the man looked up from his phone that he was looking at.

The scowl melted of his face as he saw the three idols into an easy smile. “Hello.” His voice was pleasant, but the second he saw Doctor Myung, the scowl was back again showing that he clearly had no pleasant feelings towards the doctor.

Namjoon to be honest felt insulted at that. Doctor Myung seemed like a really good doctor and everybody else in the hospital seemed to agree with Namjoon on that, so what right did this man have to see the doctor like that?

“You really should eat your dinner,” Doctor Myung said with a soft voice as he pointed towards the tray of food standing at the alpha’s side table, “everybody else said it tasted very well.”

Namjoon looked at the food and had to admit it looked good, but he also noted that the food looked to be very calorie light. Probably in a way to make sure that the patients actually would be able to eat it. The man in the bed just shrugged hard eyes still laser focused on the doctor. “I’m not hungry.”

“That is really a shame, I heard you weren’t hungry at breakfast either. You are going to hurt our cook’s feelings very soon which is going to make her very sad. She puts a lot of work into preparing the food for you guys.” Again another shrug from the man.

“Gunho.” Doctor Myung’s voice had a edge to it at that point, and it was the first time that Namjoon heard the friendly doctor sounding like that, but that that point he couldn’t really blame him either, the man… Gunho seemed like an ass.

Namjoon knew he shouldn’t think that. He knew that Gunho was in a toxic mindset and how he was acting probably wasn’t who he was as a real person just something he was projecting to show that he was okay. But that really didn’t make him more likeable.

Gunho changed his glare to a more relaxed normal look at he turned his gaze onto the idols again. “Does he have you guys locked up here against your will as well?”

“This was your packs choice and the hospital agreed with them that you needed help, you are here to get help not to be locked up.” Doctor Myung’s voice had returned to the same voice of soft reassurance that he had used on the other patients.

It was clear for Namjoon that the young Doctor clearly cared for Gunho as well and wanted the man to get better. Even if he was making it as hard as humanly possible. “We are just here to visit and see what happens here.” Himchan’s voice mirrored Namjoon’s in hesitation, it was clear that Himchan didn’t really know what to say either.

“Locking up perfectly healthy people is what is happening here. I get it yeah some of the people here need help, but look at me I’m healthy and I just need to loose a little bit more weight and then it’s fine. Doesn’t everybody want to be a little bit thinner? It’s normal, the doctors here are just crazy seeing disorders in something as normal as dieting.”

Doctor Myung looked… he just looked sad at that moment as he looked at the man in the bed. “We talked about it that starvation is not a diet.”

“I’m not starving myself.” Gunho insisted. “It is just dieting. Tons of people do it, it’s normal and natural.” His tone had a hint of aggression under it and it was clear that it was an argument that the two had had many times before.

Namjoon could feel bile rise in his throat, no he couldn’t do this he thought as he stared at man in the bed. It was simply too much, this was like he was actively watching somebody try to kill themselves and all he could do was watch it. He needed to get out of there.

He almost lost his balance as he stepped a step backwards in an attempt to put distance between him and the alpha in the bed. He didn’t have the low simmering fear of alphas in him that he often had around them, no he had a different kind of fear in him. A fear he couldn’t explain.

Youngjae had placed a hand on Namjoon’s shoulder to help him keep his balance. “You okay?” the words were low only for Namjoon’s ear’s.

Namjoon just shook his head, no he wasn’t okay. He had overestimated himself. “I need to get out of here.”

He would like to say that he left with dignity, but in reality he left with his tail between his legs figuratively. He was leaning against the wall breathing heavily when Youngjae and Himchan joined him only 30 seconds later having said a quick goodbye.

Namjoon’s normally tanned skin was deadly pale as he looked at the two betas. “That could have been me… that was me… Oh god that was me.”

(Insert mandetory excuse for why the chapter is late)

Jokes aside, this chapter was super hard for me to write, if you are not a person that reads my notes all over the blog, eating disorders are something that I struggle writing in general, but this was especially hard to write, in the end, I ended up scrapping two scenes that were supposed to be in this chapter. One scene with a person suffering from major brain damage from anorexia and then a visit to the morgue with somebody who died of it.

In the end I decided to delete it since I decided that it was actually to dark for the story!

But we are now over all the hard eating disorder stuff over the next chapter is going to be smut, fluffy soft omega on omega smut with Daehyun!