#so i somehow wrote my friend into my story when i didn't even know my friend yet?

[midnightcrw]

Provocative

Pairing: Alastor x fem!reader

Summary: Lucifer visits the Hazbin Hotel because his daughter called him, but there he sees a good friend he hasn't seen in a long time.

Warnings: Swearing, even though it's only one swear word (this is fluff, by the way)

a/n: Since you all wanted a second part, I finally wrote one, although I really wasn't sure how to continue. I tried my best, and unfortunately, I'm not that happy with it, but hopefully, you all will like it somehow / Part 1

A headache threatened to make itself known as you looked unimpressed as the King of Hell shook your shoulders, causing you to rock back and forth.

"Did your parents drop you on your head when you were a kid?" Lucifer asked in a desperate tone, not wanting to believe that you and Alastor were a thing (obviously still not knowing that you're married to each other).

"Maybe," you said nonchalantly, ready to push him away if he didn't stop shaking you.

"But-" that's it, you thought as you pushed Lucifer's hands away from your shoulders, surprising him by that before cupping his face in your hand, squeezing his cheeks tightly as he stared at you with wide eyes.

"Listen to me," you began in a stern tone, glaring at him, making him visibly swallow. "You're going to let your daughter show you around, or I'm going to skin you infront of everyone."

With that, you let go of his face as you dusted off your hands, as if you had touched something dirty.

The rest of the residents could only stare with shocked expressions. Fortunately, they hadn't heard what you had said, but from what they had seen, it was definitely intense, as no one would dare do such a thing to the Ruler of Hell.

Though Alastor didn't look shocked, he seemed to be fuming as one of his eyes twitched while the crazed grin never left his face.

"Okay... Anyway, Dad. Look at this lovely parlor where people can get to know each other and share secrets and stories and intimate feelings!" The excitement was vivid in Charlie's tone as she had her beautiful smile on her face.

She was already trying to move on, wanting to make her point to her dad and you appreciated the fact that you weren't in the spotlight anymore.

Thinking that you were finally getting some peace, you sighed in relief before you felt Alastor's head on top of yours.

"Tell me, darling. How long have you known this little pesky, but surely powerful man?" The 'powerful' was emphasized, as the static seemed to get even more grating with his snippy tone.

Alastor was not the jealous type, you knew that. But he always had his moments, loving to meddle in other people's affairs while hiding his own.

Huffing, you turned around and looked up at him, "While you were gone for seven years, I might have befriended him."

The anger was evident in your voice as you did not explain further. Not only had your husband left you for a few years out of nowhere, but now he was suddenly trying to pry information out of you.

Alastor just laughed at your answer and shook his head while your hands clenched into fists.

And before you could curse him, he suddenly moved much closer, almost pressing his forehead against yours. "Surely for nothing of lustful nature," he whispered sharply, sounding almost disgusted as he uttered the word 'lustful'.

"Maybe I should have," two could play this game, and you certainly weren't going to back down now, since he loved to provoke you so much.

Hearing your reply, the static increased as his antlers grew before he suddenly disappeared in front of your eyes, now standing further away from you.

"Charlie has a very unique vision," your husband began as he approached Charlie, speaking very animatedly, "I am happy to fulfill her bizarre requests," he said, placing his hand on the blonde's shoulder as she thanked him.

Of course, seeing that didn't make Lucifer happy at all, since he was already planning to kill Alastor when he got the chance.

And to be honest, at this point, you couldn't care less, almost ready to encourage Lucifer.

"Quite an impressive young lady. We're all very proud of her." The man dressed in red knew what he was doing as he pulled Charlie closer.

Somehow, even though he was angry, the short man managed to steer the conversation to another topic, such as getting introduced to the rest of the people in the hotel.

With a smile on her face, Charlie pulled Vaggie near her, "This is Vaggie. She's my girlfriend."

You had probably never seen Lucifer so relieved as a grin made its way across his face, "Oh my golly, you like girls?"

You truly wanted to bang your head against something, knowing that he was going to embarrass himself.

"Yes, so do I. We have so much in common. You put her there, Maggie," he said as he pulled Vaggie into a bone crushing hug, making her a bit uncomfortable with his enthusiasm.

"He didn't even get the name right..." you muttered, rubbing your temple in frustration.

And of course, it wouldn't be Alastor if he didn't continue to annoy you further, "Everything all right, my sweet?"

"Would be much better without you here," you said, avoiding eye contact, not wanting to deal with him right now.

"Is that so?" Alastor whispered in your ear with a toothy grin on his face, looking pleased with himself as you flinched at the sudden closeness.

All you could do was exhale sharply as you stepped away from him, even though he teleported right back into your personal space.

Ignoring him, you just watched the rest of the residents.

"Hello, I clean." Niffty giggled to herself as she grabbed hold of Lucifer's coat, causing him to stare at her with an uncertain expression on his face.

"Don't you dare throw the chandelier to the floor," you whispered, already one step ahead of him.

"Oh, and how well you know me," Alastor said in a delighted voice, and now you wished you hadn't told him that, because it seemed that another plan was brewing in that big head of his.

Without warning, your husband suddenly put an arm around your waist as he walked you closer to the rest of the people.

"You must be proud of Charlie since she has already found people who want to redeem themselves," the grin didn't leave his face as usual as the attention was once again back on you and Alastor.

Lucifer's eye twitched as he looked at you, not liking the fact that the deer was holding his friend so close.

"Sure I am," the short man said as he pulled you out of the radio demon's grip, causing the static to be heard.

"Doesn't seem like it," Alastor said quickly, jumping to the next topic before Lucifer could interject in annoyance, "I even remember the exact moment Charlie needed help, and of course, being the perfect gentleman, I couldn't help but lend a hand." He chuckled to himself as he suddenly grabbed your hand, wanting to pull you to him, but Lucifer didn't let go of your hand, but nonetheless he continued to talk anyway.

"You could almost call me dad," Alastor said with a sinister grin as both men continued to pull on your hand.

"Surely no one would call you that," the King of Hell said with contempt in his voice as he glared at your husband and suddenly turned his eyes to you, "I promise you, you can do better than this. Have you seen his haircut?"

"I see it every day," you muttered.

Charlie didn't seem to be in a better mood than you, as she let herself fall onto the sofa while Vaggie patted her head. And somehow Angel Dust was eating popcorn, even holding the popcorn bag in front of the Princess of Hell as she started to eat some of it while they all watched the three of you.

"In fact, she sees it every day and every night," Alastor added with a crazed look in his eyes as he started to get annoyed.

The look on Lucifer's face was hilarious. One would really like to see his reaction if he knew that Alastor wasn't interested in anything sexual, but just loved to anger people, especially those who didn't pay attention to him.

"Nobody wants to see that atrocity!"

"Well, she loves it!"

"She doesn't!"

And before things could get worse, Husk suddenly said, "Mimzy is here."

With that, your eyes widened as you looked towards the entrance while the men stopped pulling on your hands.

Oh and how you hated her.

"Surely you all missed me!" The voice of the beautiful little woman was heard, clearly directed at your husband.

Fuck no, you thought.

Taglist

@nonetheartist

@anuttellaa

@explosionkatsu

@randomuser-89

@nightlydream

@itsmskeisha

@l0ca1ax010t1

[notanactressyayy]

—𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭—

pairing . Natasha Romanoff x fem! reader

summary . she needs you, in multiple ways — she's just scared to ask for it.

warnings . smut — I am NOT responsible for the content you consume — thigh riding, scissoring, fingering, vulnerable sex (because yes), taking care of Nat because she deserves it.

notes . English is not my first language, I'm brazilian, so I apologize for any grammar mistakes. this is probably the first fic I ever post so hi hi!!!

(I'm sorry if this is bad, I literally wrote that in a waiting room, completely in a rush.)

divider credits: @cafekitsune ^^

You didn't know exactly why the TV was on. You weren't interested on the show, and Natasha wasn't even looking at it. Her eyes looked down as she fidgeted with her fingers. You could tell she was anxious, that something was bothering her.

You just never expected that this was something to do with you — no, you didn't do anything wrong. It was her.

Natasha and you met years ago, and had been in a situationship for a while now. You weren't friends, but somehow, you couldn't recall the time you started dating (because it never existed). Friends with benefits was too cliché, and maybe not enough to describe what you actually had with her.

To begin with it, you met Natasha when she was still an Avenger. You were never part of the team, but they treated you as if you were. You were close to everyone, but specially Natasha. There was a reason she had let that happen, since according to her, she was in New York to be a hero, and not to have friends.

Friends.

The moment the russian started to blush whenever Thor teased her about how close she was to you or when you simply stared at her for a few seconds or more was when she realized that she made a mistake. A good one, she hoped. In a heartbeat, she was telling you her story.

You listened — just, listened. Your hand went to brush her hair behind her ear whenever she looked down, and the sparkle of pride in your eyes was not something she could miss. You didn't pity her. You didn't try to bring up a justification for what she went through, or to bring up a solution to fix her. You were proud of her for who she became, and were there for her whenever she didn't want to be that person for a while.

It was with that trust in you that she found herself wanting, craving even, something more. She's human, wether she like it or not. She can't deny her feelings or urges, not even the most dangerous spy can.

So her walls broke when you said you were going with her to Norway after the Avengers split.

Natasha shifted a little in the couch, the blankets around her getting all crumpled as she took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. Your focus went from the soft patting of the raindrops in the window to the woman next to you, as you frowned a bit.

"Nat?" you called, leaning your side against the backrest of the couch and looking at her. "What's wrong?"

She turned to you, a little startled, but tried to shake it off with a small grin. "Oh, it's nothing. It's just a little hot in here."

"We're in Norway," you laughed, giving her that goddamn smile of yours. "And.. it's raining."

"The..." she shook her head, failing miserably to come up with an excuse. "The blankets are making me hot."

"Mhm, are they?" you raised an eyebrow, and pulled the blankets off you both, and letting half of them fall to the floor. "Better?"

Natasha shivered, but nodded nonetheless. You saw she was unquiet, and that this looked a little more serious than the normal.

"Natasha."

"Yeah?"

"What is going on?" you repeated your question, scooting closer to her and placing your hand above hers — just to make things worse.

Natasha almost whined at your action, which made you pull your hand back and frown even more. "I'm sorry,"

"No, it's not your fault." she shook her head. "It's mine."

"Then tell me." you smiled softly, lifting her head up to meet your eyes with your pointer finger. The sight of her green orbs was something you maybe never saw before.

"I..." she mumbled, clearing her throat. She then grabbed your hand and held your wrist gently, not sure of what to do next. "I don't know."

"It's okay," you whispered, bringing her hand up and placing a kiss on it. You had no problem with being affectionate and she didn't mind either, but today, it was different.

"Y/n". Natasha whispered back, looking into your eyes and getting lost in them. She was clearly unsure of what to do, and how to express what she was feeling. So she brought your hand up and placed your palm above her heart. Faster than the speed of light.

"Hey..." you cooed, tilting your head as you felt the aggressive beating against your hand. "You... are you, scared of something?"

"No." she quickly shook her head. She wasn't having any negative emotions right now. "I'm not anxious, I'm not scared.. I'm just.."

"Just what?"

The fact she was not having an anxious episode or a panic attack made you slightly relaxed, but not completely — then you realized, the touches you were giving her made her sensitive. She was needy.

The Red Room turned her into a closed person, and that didn't completely vanish when she was with you — it was like there was a bug in her system that had to be fixed, soon. She couldn't be totally open, but not completely closed.

You smiled at the thought, and leaned in closer, inches away from her face, which made her breathing uneven. "Tell me what you need, Nat."

"I..." she took a deep inhale and placed her hand on your cheek, pulling you into an unexpected kiss — a desperate one.

She kissed you frantically, her movements with urgency as she placed her hands behind your neck, trying to pull you close. You couldn't say you expected this, but it wasn't unwelcomed either.

Your hands went to her waist as she shyly crawled onto your lap, her legs hooking around your hips as she pulled away for air, her forehead against yours.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." she breathed, feeling her eyes start to burn with unleashed tears.

"You have absolutely nothing to apologize for." you murmured, arms gently wrapping around her as she straddled you. "It's okay, let's not rush things. Let's take deep breaths, mhm?"

The fact you wanted her to calm down before anything almost calmed her down instantly, but she breathed with you, then leaned her head on yours, her cheek on your hair.

"I just need something," she whispered, more calmly now. "I—I think I need you."

"And I'm here," you turned your head to press a kiss on her temple, caressing her back. The redhead melted.

Natasha leaned down to kiss your lips again, but not with urgency. She sighed softly against your lips, her hands moving to hold your face, and yours, to hold her waist. It didn't take long for her to start moving slowly — she shifted, instead of straddling your lap, her legs were around your thigh. Your eyes opened, and you broke the kiss to look at her.

"Nat, my love," you whispered. "Are you sure of this?"

"Please." she uttered back, closing her eyes and gripping your shoulders. "I know you'd ever hurt me.. you would never disrespect me, you would stop if I asked you to. Right... right?"

You smiled sadly, realizing she was trying to reassure herself, and not actually ask you this. "Yes, yes, Natasha. I want to take care of you. I want to see you, beyond that shell they turned you in. I want you to feel comfortable enough with me to ask for this, and this is such a big step for you."

She sighed in relief, hearing the honesty in your voice. She nodded, clearing her throat. She leaned down, hiding her face on the crook of her neck and pressing small, gentle kisses on it. Then her hips started to slowly move, and the tiniest bit of friction made her gasp. "Y/n..."

"Shh," you held her hips, guiding her through her own pace. The little high waisted shorts she wore rolled up, so surprisingly thick that you could feel her wetness. "That's great, Natty. Move yourself for me, like this."

Natasha whined at your words, starting to grind against you slightly faster. The clothes were starting to feel uncomfortable, as she felt the need of you seeing her. She grabbed your hands, and slowly moved them underneath her blouse.

You did what she wanted, grazing your fingernails against her skin and slowly massaging her flesh, resulting in a soft moan of hers. "Take it off." You looked at her with a questioning look, even if you had an idea of what she was asking for. "Undress me, Y/n."

Given her permission, you smoothly lifted her blouse and pulled it over her head, letting it fall to the floor. She stopped her movements briefly, just so you could slide her shorts and panties down her thighs, her heat now in contact with your leg making you groan.

She felt your hands moving up to unclasp her bra and smirked softly, holding her arms out so you could take down the straps. That woman was surely breathtaking, her body, her marks, her scars, her voice, her everything.

"Natty," you uttered, pressing kisses in the valley between her breasts and moving up, to her ear. "There's so much I wanna do with you..."

Natasha closed her eyes, your touch making her shiver again, as she began to fastly grind her pussy against your thigh. "Please." she quickly removed your shirt and soon enough, you both were completely naked.

The feeling of skin against hers, the human touch that she never felt when getting off with a strap while thinking of you was unbelievable, a touch that she knew that wouldn't hurt her. It was so good, so different from the men she seduced when a spy, so different from the men that touched her in the Red Room.

"My pretty girl," you hissed, throwing your leg above hers and starting to grind yourself with her. "So beautiful, and all mine."

"Yes," she panted, burying her face in your neck again as her nails lightly scratched your back. "Y/n, please."

"You're coming with me." you sweetly commanded. Natasha started to whisper things in Russian that you couldn't really understand, but you took it as a sign that she was close.

Soon enough, Natasha's legs started to shake and her moans on your ear got slightly louder, you both coming together, her juices mixing with yours. She didn't stop, though. You gasped, looking up at her. She still needed more.

"Touch me." Natasha growled, grabbing your hand and moving it close to her cunt. She was starting to feel confident, and you liked it.

You didn't think twice before burying your middle and pointer fingers on her hole, using your thumb to slowly rub circles on her clit, biting your lip at the sight of her back arched. All for you.

"God, Y/n," she moaned, using her own hands to squeeze her breasts and circle her hard nipples. "Yes, just like that."

"You like it like this?" you asked, shoving one more finger inside her, her moans getting louder. She slowly started to lift herself from your fingers, just to lower her hips again, riding your fingers. "You're gonna come for me again?"

"Yes!" she nodded frantically, her breaths coming in little gasps for air. She gripped your shoulders tightly, throwing her head back and orgasming again. It took a while for her to calm down, and you didn't waste time before gently taking her and laying her down on the couch, spreading her legs and pressing soft kisses on her inner thighs, licking her juices and making her squirm around.

"Y/n," she murmured quietly, reaching her arms out.

"Oh, baby." you pulled Nat into an embrace, holding her close to your chest and caressing her hair, running your fingers through her red locks. "It's alright."

Natasha whimpered, wanting to hide herself in your arms and never come out again. She closed her eyes and laid her head on your chest, arms circling your waist.

The talk about this could wait. The silence was comfortable enough for now.

[roosterforme]

Covering the Classics Part 12 | Bob Floyd x OC

Summary: When Anna noticed that a new poem by her favorite, amateur writer had been posted, she was afraid to read the finality in his tone. But Bob always managed to surprise her. And maybe she could find a way to surprise Kevin, too.

Warnings: Angst, Kevin is a dick, adult language, 18+

Length: 3600 words

Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Female OC (this story is part of the Beer Boy/Sugar and Jake/Jessica universe)

Covering the Classics masterlist. Check my masterlist for more!

After that, it was radio silence. Anna didn't reach out to Bob, and he didn't try to either. He went to the Hard Deck on Friday night and lasted about an hour before excusing himself. Nobody asked him why he was bailing after one ginger ale and a single cup of peanuts, and that was enough to tell him that everyone knew. Everyone knew he slept with Anna. Everyone knew she was married. Everyone knew that they shouldn't talk about it in front of him for fear that the ladies would snap their necks. Even Nat was being very kind and considerate which wasn't really like her at all. 

When Bob was halfway to the door, he felt a small hand curl around the back of his bicep. "I'll see you tomorrow night for D&D?"

He nodded down at Jessica's hopeful face. "Yeah. I can pick you up if you want."

Her face brightened a little bit. "I'll text you in the morning." He turned to walk out, and her hand slid down his arm. "Hey, Bob? Don't give up hope on her, okay?"

He didn't know how to respond, so he just kept walking. He had no idea what to say or what to think. It wasn't like he could stop loving someone overnight. He didn't really want to either. Anna's life was quite frankly messier than he had ever expected. She did a pretty good job of hiding it from everyone, and it seemed like she would have continued down that path if they didn't have sex. And that was the other issue; it wasn't just sex to Bob. Anna knew about the things he tried to hide himself, and she seemed to want him in that moment anyway. 

Her words from the previous night made him ache. 

'You're perfect. You're Sky Writing. You're the handsome man from the bookstore who smells like tea and soap. You're Bob, the guy my friends knew I would fall in love with as soon as I met them.'

If that meant she was in love with him or that she thought she could be someday, then he was afraid to walk away from her. But now he was terrified of getting hurt or somehow hurting Anna like Kevin had. Part of him believed if he could just see Anna's husband with his own eyes, confirm that he was exactly the way she described him, then he might be able accept that she just needed time to settle her divorce and to heal. If that was the case, he wanted to make it work. 

In the meantime, when he got home, he ended up standing in his living room, staring at his bookshelf before going upstairs and staring at his bed. He could still picture her red hair all spread out for him. He could still feel it between his fingers as the silky strands slid along his palm. He could taste her on his tongue. He could hear her telling him what she wanted.

Bob picked up his computer and slipped under the covers, knowing he wasn't going to be able to sleep right now.

----------------------------

It had been there since early Saturday morning. A new one. Anna desperately wanted to read it and memorize it like she had the others, but she was afraid to face the finality. Her email alert mocked her every time she looked at it.

Sky Writing has posted a new, original work! Click the link below to check out the subscriber that you follow!

Bob wrote a new poem, and she didn't think she could handle reading exactly how he viewed her now. He'd never be like Kevin, openly belittling her or putting her down, but she knew the shiny packaging had been removed now, and he saw what was really inside. Just a mess of a human. She put off reading it and put off reading it, but when she was sitting at her desk at work on Monday, she made herself decide between reading the new poem or calling Kevin. After a fairly short debate, she decided to read the poem. It was probably so bad, calling Kevin later wouldn't even feel painful in comparison. 

She tapped on the link in her email and was taken to something so unexpected, she gasped as she read it.

There is empty space on my bookshelf,

The one I bought with you in mind.

I didn't know it was for you at the time,

But one night made it obvious,

Before an instance took it.

Reality surpassed intention today.

Your worn favorites and mine pristine,

Should mingle and mix,

Genre forgotten.

Dog eared pages became so endearing.

But I'll never see them on my shelf,

Unless you come back and stay this time.

The format was different from what he usually wrote, but it was so obviously Sky Writing. So obviously Bob. So obviously about her. And he didn't sound angry. Could he possibly miss her after everything she did and said?

She jumped when her phone vibrated on her desk, and for a split second, she believed it could be Bob. Her heart beat faster with anticipation, but it was from somebody else.

Jessica Reed: If you don't come down to this weird tree right now, we're going to come up and get you.

Anna had lost track of time. It was after noon now. She knew that her friends were trying to make sure she was holding herself together after she refused to go to the Hard Deck over the weekend. How could she continue to go somewhere that Bob had the rights to first? It wasn't until she read his Sky Writing poem that she thought perhaps there was a chance he might not only be okay with her presence but perhaps even miss her like she missed him.

With her sad little lunch in hand, she dragged herself down to the quad, trying to decide when was the best time to call Kevin. She was tired of going through lawyers who couldn't seem to get him to budge, and each ninety day window just ate away at more of her soul. She should have been so much more careful with her writing when she had the opportunity, and now he'd completely locked her out of being able to access it. 

No, she was going to have to beg him, plead with him, anything it took to get what she wanted without giving away where she'd moved. Maybe if he agreed to let her have her manuscript, one of her friends would let her borrow money for a flight back to New Jersey to retrieve it. She was getting ahead of herself, but she couldn't help it. She needed to at least get this one thing.

"There she is!"

Anna looked up to see her friends directly in front of her on the bench by the tree, and the fact that they both looked happy to see her made her heart ache. "Hi," she said softly as she sat down between them when they both scooted over.

"Hummus?" her friend asked, passing along a container while she bit into her perfect looking chicken salad sandwich on artisan bread. Anna accepted a few bites of Bradley's gourmet snack, because she was absolutely starving today.

"Thanks," she murmured, and she let herself sink into the background a little bit as the two other women continued the conversation they'd been having. Now that she was down here with his friends, she couldn't stop thinking about Bob again. His soft hair and his kind eyes. The way he always paid attention to her when she was talking. How good he made her feel.

She listened to her friends argue about alumni weekend for a few minutes before she finally cut them off to ask, "Has Bob said anything about me?" Both of them looked at her, and she quickly added, "I can't stop thinking about him."

Jessica smiled softly and said, "Not a word, but I've never seen him look so sad. And I mean that in a good way, because although I know he's confused and hurt, I'm pretty sure he just misses you."

"But," the other woman quickly cut in, "the most important thing right now is making sure you take care of yourself. Even if you are in love with Bob."

"Oh!" Jessica exclaimed. "I have an idea! We could just kill Kevin!"

Anna snorted in spite of herself. "That would actually solve a lot of my problems. Maybe even all of them."

"Only one problem with that," Advanced Calculus said blandly. "You're not a killer, Jessica."

"I could kill someone," Jessica muttered under her breath, and truly Anna almost laughed, because Jessica Reed was one of the gentlest people she'd ever met. The most violent thing about her was her Dungeons & Dragons character. "I could at least probably slap him."

"He wouldn't know what hit him," Anna said, and all three women erupted into laughter. And it felt so strange to feel genuine happiness, even if it only lasted for a few seconds, that Anna almost started crying. As their amusement died down, she asked her friends, "Do you think.... Bob would respond if I texted him?"

Jessica squeaked, and then both women said, "Yes."

---------------------------

Bob was back to square one. Back at the bookstore. He was fifteen minutes early. He was already looking through the Classics. He was about to meet up with Anna. He was nervous.

Nat scoffed when he told her where he was going, and he truly did appreciate that his friend wanted him to proceed with caution, but she just didn't understand how Anna made him feel. Being friends with her after sleeping together a total of one time might kill him, but he knew that was probably all he could have now.

It was almost like he could sense that she was there. He looked up from the Shakespeare volume in his hand, and he saw her walk in the door. As he got closer to the loft railing, he saw her glance up and meet his eyes like it was some depraved version of Romeo and Juliet. She mouthed the word Hi before she headed for the stairs, and in less than a minute, she was standing right in front of him. 

Anna looked nervous, but everything else was just the same. Those perfect freckles decorated her face. Her brown eyes were bright. Her pretty hair was in a messy braid. He saw her burgundy nail polish as she fidgeted with her denim jacket. He wanted to know if she still thought he was the kind of person she could love. He wanted to ask her if her husband was any closer to signing papers. Instead he said, "I was surprised when you texted me."

Her eyes went wide, and he wished he could shove his foot in his mouth as she started looking around anywhere but at his face. "I need some books for my feminist literature course, and I just thought maybe you'd like more books for your bookshelf."

Had she read his newest poem? It was a sloppy one that he wrote late on Friday night and posted on a whim. She could have deleted her account by now or vowed never to read anything else by Sky Writing. But that didn't stop the poem from being about her.

"I do need some more books for my shelves," he replied, and her eyes finally settled on his again. "And you don't have to be nervous around me. I know you're dealing with a lot, and I promise I won't touch you or anything."

Now she just looked sad and distraught, but she nodded and turned down the very aisle where they first met. Bob had to fight to keep a few feet of space between them as she said, "I'm looking for Mary Wollstonecraft, Charlotte Perkins Gilman, and Elizabeth Cady Stanton."

They worked their way slowly up and back down each aisle, falling into a natural conversation in spite of the awkwardness between them. In spite of the way Bob couldn't keep himself from looking at her as she ran her fingers along the spines. When she wanted something that was on a top shelf, he reached it down for her. When her hands got full, he offered his up for her use. And to his delight and also sadness, she kept recommending books for him along the way. That's how he ended up with Miss Pettigrew Lives For a Day as well as The Importance of Being Earnest in his hand when she led the way downstairs to pay.

Bob cleared his throat as Anna reached into her pocket for some cash. "I can get them."

Her brown eyes snapped up to meet his, and her cheeks turned pink. He already knew what Kevin did, and while he didn't think there was any harm in saying it, he could tell that she at least had her pride intact. "The college is going to reimburse me," she said firmly before handing forty dollars across the counter.

"Right," Bob said before paying for his own books. When they walked out into the fading sunlight, he looked down into her pretty face. "Will you let me drive you home? Not because I think I need to, but because I want to?"

She seemed at war with herself as she looked across the street and pressed her lips together. But her eyes fluttered closed and she said, "I would really appreciate that."

The interior of his truck was quiet the whole way as their books sat on the seat between them. Only the soft hum of the radio helped Bob hold his thoughts at bay. The ride wasn't too long, and when they were most of the way there, Anna finally spoke. 

"I'm going to deal with my shit. I promise."

Unsure exactly how he should respond, Bob simply said, "Okay."

When he pulled up in front of her building, he turned toward her, intending to ask if she wanted him to walk her up, but she was gathering her books together as she said, "I don't know how you feel about me now. I don't know if you could want me again. But I am going to deal with Kevin. I am going to fix my life. Because I want to move on. I need to." When he was so flustered that he didn't immediately respond, Anna said, "You know where to find me. Thanks for the ride."

He watched her run up the sidewalk before struggling to open the door with her arms full, and then she ducked inside when he finally figured out what he wanted to say. "I'll find you."

-------------------------------

If Anna even had a hope or a prayer at a chance with Bob ever again, she needed to work up the nerve. A real chance with him now that he knew all about her disastrous marriage was what she wanted, but she needed to sort Kevin out first. 

As far as she could tell, everything came down to two options: keep her freedom by giving Kevin ownership of her manuscript, or keep her self worth by fighting until she didn't have anything left to give up. And both of them sounded terrifying. The whole weekend passed where she tried so many times to call him. She took her phone out again and again, let her thumb hover over her husband's phone number, and then chickened out. His voice was like a distant memory, and she didn't want to bring it back to the forefront of her mind. He hadn't reached out one time since she up and left without telling him where she was going, and she was afraid to let him know where she was now.

The worst part was, he would know immediately why she was calling. He knew that he had the one thing she wanted. He cut off her access to the cloud files where she should have been able to piece her writing back together. It would have been time consuming, but she would have been all too happy to do it. She should have known better than to let him have so much of her life and so many of her resources in only his name, but there was a time when she trusted him. That was the part that made her so sick. She had trusted her husband, and now look where it got her.

A shiver went through her body as she woke up for work too early on Monday morning. She wanted Kevin's computer where everything was saved. She wanted access to the cloud. She didn't want a damn penny from him otherwise. She was aggressively brushing her teeth, wishing she had more to eat than a granola bar when she spit out her toothpaste and rinsed her mouth.

She hated him. She hated him so much, she was going to call him right now. Without a backward glance, she marched over to where her phone was charging and pulled the cable out. Before she could even think about exactly what she was going to say, she tapped on his stupid name.

Anna was breathing fast and deep, her heart pounding in her ears when she heard his voice for the first time in so many months.

"Anna?" he asked, her whole body cringing after just one word. His voice was scratchy as if she had woken him up, but it was 9:16 in New Jersey. He should be on his way to work if not there already.

"Kevin," she snapped, gripping her phone tighter. She was getting angrier by the second as she listened to him yawn while she looked around her tiny apartment.

His tone was condescending as he said, "Of course you'd call me at six in the fucking morning after I haven't hear a word from you except through a lawyer since July. What the hell do you want?"

She couldn't do this. She couldn't talk to him. While she felt strong a few minutes ago, her resolve was already crumbling. She wanted to tell him that he knew damn well what she wanted, but then she zeroed in on what he said. "What do you mean it's six in the morning? It's after nine."

His voice was suddenly loud and harsh. "I meant exactly what I said. I'm in California for a medical convention. Now get to the point of your call."

Her mouth felt like sandpaper as she carefully put her phone on speaker. She started searching for Neurological conventions in California while she told him, "I just want my manuscript. Please, Kevin. That's all I want, and then you can be rid of me."

The bite was gone from his voice, replaced by a lazy tone, and he spoke to her as if she were a very simple child. "It's not going to happen, Anna. I didn't cut off access to it for no reason. It's worth money. You can pay me for it, or you can kiss it goodbye. I might even publish it myself."

She was gasping for air as she scrolled through her search results, coming up with a conference in Carlsbad that was starting today. As the page loaded, she swallowed and told him, "I'll sue you if you do." But even she knew she was full of shit.

"What what money, Anna? I'm surprised you can still afford your lawyers. I don't even want to know what you're doing to make ends meet right now."

Then she saw it. She saw his name. He was a keynote speaker at the National Neurological Physicians Association conference. He was less than an hour away. She sank down to her knees in surprise and fear. Her mind was swirling with information and ideas, and she couldn't even comprehend what Kevin was saying now.

"What?" she gasped.

"I said come up with some money for me, or I'm not signing shit." Then he ended the call as her hands started shaking. She dropped her phone onto her bed. He was in Carlsbad. Maybe she could surprise him. Maybe she could talk him into it easier in person.

Anna had to run to the bathroom to be sick, but her mind was made up. Once she cleaned herself up again, she tearfully made the decision to cancel her morning classes via email, and then she started grabbing her purse and her essentials. She folded up the newest copy of the divorce paperwork her lawyer had emailed to her and tucked it away. Then she ran for the bus stop, nearly tripping several times as she read through the schedule of speakers who were at the conference this week on her phone. If she caught a bus within the next fifteen minutes, she might make it in time to see Kevin right before he gave his welcome speech.

---------------------------

We will meet Kevin in the next chapter. Now is an acceptable time to start sharpening your knives. Bob, please don't give up on Anna. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 13

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[ikeuverse]

PARTY IN THE U.S.A — s.jaeyun

PAIRING: jake x fem!reader  GENRES: fluff, humor  WC: 2.5k+

WARNINGS: just a few curses and (a lot of) kissing.

SYNOPSIS: you've never missed watching your best friend play, but unfortunately a match falls right on the day of a super-important exam. jake is distraught because it's right when his team loses, making him listen to the one song that everyone knows he listens to when he's sad… it's up to you to sort it out somehow.

NOTES: the vote for the next story had our dear jake as the winner, so here it is! i wrote this one a while ago at the time of the live he said he listens to this song when he's sad, so i thought about it and just came up with this. i hope you like it!

masterlist

"Are you really not going to watch my game today?" Jake's melancholy voice almost made your heart break even more.

It was more than obvious that you wanted to go, not least because you had never missed a single one of his games for the university team. But that same university was tearing your sanity apart by holding an exam in the middle of the afternoon, where more than half the students would be watching the soccer team play.

Jake was the top scorer. Famous for his relentless passing, his perfect goals – not to mention his breathtaking looks. You, as his best friend, couldn't deny the slight crush you felt. It was ridiculous to say that kind of thing when you knew that half the campus fell in love with him.

But on that particular day, it wasn't as if you weren't going because you wanted to. Your teacher would kill you �� and your whole class – if you missed that test. It was important. So was Jake's game. Ever since you became friends at the beginning of high school and he joined every sport possible, you went to watch him play. It was a tradition for both of you, even if it was raining. That's why you accumulated raincoats of all colors in your closet and even one or two different umbrellas; one of them even too big for your liking to hold your friends when they went with you.

You did everything for Jake and he recognized that, so much so that he felt selfish when he sulked all day just because you weren't going today. He wouldn't meet your eyes once you got on the pitch.

He couldn't hear you shouting his name after a goal or even running up to the stands and hugging your friends. A mere excuse he had since you were always with all of them, so Jake could hug you too.

A long sigh left your lips as you left the university hall. The pencil and pen pressed against your fingers as you walked through the corridors with the thought that you had done well. The content was extensive, and the whole thing was giving you a headache, but studying every night had been worth it after all. Because even when you felt tired, even when you'd exhausted yourself studying at night, Jake would show up to keep you company.

Shit, Jake. You quickly checked your cell phone for a message from him, because by that time the game was surely over.

To your surprise, he hadn't sent anything, but your cell phone had hundreds of messages from Jungwon and Heeseung. Your heart sank at this.

Dialing the number of one of the boys, you were grateful when Jungwon answered on the second ring.

"Y/n?" he didn't even wait for you to say anything, just seeing your name flashing on the screen of his cell phone.

"Jungwon, hey. Is everything okay?" you knew it wasn't. And Jungwon knew that you were smart enough to know that since he had called your cell phone at least six times. Heeseung called four more.

"Well, no..." there was a slight pause on the other end of the line, his footsteps instinctively tightening as he walked across campus "Can you come to our apartment?"

He didn't even have to ask you once more to get you to agree and say you'd be there as soon as possible. It was a relief that the boys' apartment wasn't so far from the college, even if running hadn't been a good idea, but the desperation of Jungwon's call made your heart squeeze and think of a thousand different scenarios.

Had Jake been hurt during the game? What had happened to make things go wrong like that? The thought of Jake being hurt made your whole body ache, and he blamed himself for not being there and for not providing enough assistance.

It was the only game you hadn't been to in all these years of friendship, so this feeling was rather new. Add to that the fact that you'd had a crush on him for a while, wanting to see him play or do something alongside him, but that was something that wouldn't even come out of your mouth.

Standing in front of the apartment complex, it didn't take long for you to enter and go straight to the elevator that gave access to the boys' floor. But especially today, the journey seemed much longer and more time-consuming, and you'd been doing it for so long that you couldn't even count, but it was torturing you so much.

"Y/n" Jungwon called out as soon as the door opened, without letting you realize that you had already reached their floor, stopped at the door and even rang the bell.

"Hi" you hugged him briefly, entering the apartment and being greeted by Heeseung with a quick hug as well "So?"

"Look…" Jungwon sighed as he closed the door. The three of you walked to the center of the room as he took the initiative in the conversation "You know, we lost the game today…"

He didn't want you to feel guilty at all. Jungwon understood about your commitments, even Sunghoon was with you – because he was from your class – taking that damn exam. You both lost today's game.

"What? Wait… Did you really lose?" your eyes widened.

"It was just a friendly, anyway" Heeseung flopped down on the sofa, picking up a cushion to rest his head on "The problem is that Jake is devastated."

Yes, he hated losing a game. You knew that.

"But I don't think it has anything to do with our defeat today" Jungwon nibbled the inside of his cheek, staring directly at you. Your eyes wandered between him and Heeseung, a frown on the face of the older man sitting on the sofa.

"He's been listening to Party in the U.S.A since we arrived, y/n. You need to do something because I can't take it anymore," he exploded.

You laughed softly, seeing Jungwon give you a disapproving look straight away. Perhaps they had rehearsed a better way to tell you something, but Heeseung's impatience made him practically beg for your help.

"And how am I going to do that? Maybe going there will be worse because I didn't go to see today's game…"

"On the contrary" Jungwon quickly interrupted, "You're the only person who can make him turn that thing off."

"Why?"

A moment of silence and Heeseung dropped the cushion, getting up from the sofa.

"It's so obvious, y/n" he rolled his eyes, but there was a playful smile on his lips as he took hold of your shoulders and led you down the corridor of the apartment. The corridor gave access to the three bedrooms as well as the bathroom.

Jake's room was the last in the corridor and, as soon as you and Heeseung got close to the door, you understood why the other two boys were so frustrated. The music was extremely loud even with the door closed – and possibly locked – while you could hear nothing but Miley Cyrus' voice.

You turned to Heeseung, noticing now that Jungwon was also behind him. Both of them looked at you with such anticipation as you stared back at them.

"How am I supposed to compete with that? When he hears that song…" you whimpered, Jungwon taking the lead to hold you by the shoulders this time.

"We trust you and the power you have over that crybaby" he winked at her, laughing and making her laugh too "Now make him turn it off or I'm breaking that little speaker today."

Both you and Heeseung knew that would never happen. It would be easier for the older one to break the speaker or for you to hide it in your apartment than for little Jungwon to do anything that would make Jake sad or even angrier.

So, turning towards his bedroom door again, you dared to give it a few knocks.

No answer.

A few more knocks and Jungwon's hands came off your shoulders. You heard footsteps moving away, looking back while the two boys were still there. As if to encourage you.

When you knocked once more, the music seemed to get even louder. As if Jake didn't want to be interrupted from his moment. You snorted at this and turned the handle on an impulse, praying that it was open or you'd punch that door until it opened.

And to your surprise it was. Jake didn't usually lock his door because he knew his friends wouldn't come into his room unless he gave permission when he was in those melancholy moments. He hadn't realized that you had opened the door until the bang of closing it made him jump out of bed.

Looking at you with an astonished face, Jake got up from the bed and practically ran towards you. His eyes were glued to yours, bright and fixed on your eyes. He didn't look like he'd cried, but he was about to if you hadn't shown up for a few more minutes.

"Y/n? What are you doing here?" he asked, you were only able to understand because of the proximity. Your shoulders shrugged and your hands went straight to your ears, indicating that you couldn't hear properly because the music was still too loud "Fuck, I'm sorry" Jake ran over to the speaker to turn it down to a considerable volume. He didn't want to stop listening to you because he still felt bad, but he would leave the music in a more comfortable setting so that he could hear your voice more clearly.

"What did you ask me?" you said after he came closer, big eyes staring at you and lips parted.

He didn't need to know that you had heard him perfectly, you just needed an excuse for him to say something and then think about how to continue the conversation.

"What are you doing here?" he asked again.

Jake seemed restless in his seat, his hands hovering at his sides and sometimes going to the hem of the sweatshirt he was wearing to play with something between his fingers.

"The boys couldn't stand the music" you smiled, but he didn't reciprocate because he had looked away from you "And I wanted to know how you were after the game."

"We lost" he said dryly, staring at you for a brief moment "Happy now?"

Jake walked away from you, his hands running through his hair as he let out a long sigh. He had his eyes closed, but you couldn't see because he preferred to keep his back to you.

"Why would I be happy about this, Jake?" you didn't want to feel upset by his tone, knowing that it was a big part of the frustration he felt. Jake sighed again, turning towards you.

"Because in all these years of friendship, you've never lost a game I've played" he was angry, you could see the way his brow furrowed as he spoke. His forehead wrinkled and his lips reddened because he had brushed his teeth a few times before speaking.

"I had a test today, it's not like I'm going to lose your game because I just wanted to," you said in the same tone, trying to get it into his head once and for all.

Jake knew he was being selfish, he knew it, and he would never interfere with your future either, because university was important to both of you. But the frustration over his newly discovered feelings for you, Heeseung, and Jungwon's teasing and the loss of today's game only intensified and he knew he would explode at some point.

Listening to Party In the U.S.A would be the only thing that would de-stress him from that whole incredibly shitty day.

"Anyway, Heeseung said it was friendly, it wasn't even a big deal" you shrugged and didn't know why you'd said it. But you knew it hadn't been a good idea when Jake got angry again. His eyes darkened and he was about to scream from the looks of it.

"So my game was no good, y/n? Is that what you mean?" he asked, you opened your mouth to say something, but Jake was quicker "You know what? Fuck, it really wasn't a big deal whether you went or not" he turned the music back up to the same volume as before, if not even louder.

The looping of Miley's voice had never entered your mind so much at that moment and you knew you wouldn't be hearing that song for weeks to come.

Talking to Jake hadn't gone as well as you'd hoped because not only was he upset, but you were upset too. It wasn't possible that your best friend was acting like this just because you hadn't gone to the game.

But then Heeseung's words echoed in your mind. It's so obvious. You didn't like to play the fool for that kind of thing, especially when it seemed to be completely reciprocated. Losing Jake's feelings for you wasn't in your plans, even more so after you came to accept that you felt it too, even if he didn't know it.

So your body acted better than your mind and, before you knew it, your hands were resting on the back of his swivel chair. With a little effort to make it spin along with Jake's body, you managed to catch his startled gaze as he started to face you.

"Y/n, you—"

"No time for bullshit, you little shit" you cursed angrily, but your actions said completely the opposite when your fingers gently held Jake's face just to keep him in place.

You pressed your lips to his and a long sigh came out of Jake's mouth at the sudden contact. He remained static for a few seconds, processing whether this was really happening or whether he was imagining it too much. But no, he wasn't dreaming and he realized it when the tip of your tongue pressed against his lips to ask for passage.

Jake gave in willingly, he wasn't going to turn down something he dreamed about practically every night even though he thought it was wrong to fantasize about his best friend.

In one swift movement, his hands grabbed your waist and pulled you onto his lap. The kiss took on even more rhythm and desire as the two of you attacked each other's lips. Your hands tangled in Jake's hair and pulled slowly as he pressed you against his body.

Gasping breaths, foreheads pressed together and the tip of his nose lightly brushing against yours.

"Jake" you called after a period of silence, him murmuring softly as he caressed your waist over the T-shirt you were wearing.

"Yeah?" he replied.

"Don't listen to that song anymore, please?" he laughed at your question, opening his eyes to find yours still closed.

You were so beautiful, but you looked even more stunning with your lips red and moist with his saliva mixed with yours from the kiss you shared with him, sitting on his lap. Jake couldn't help letting out a sigh, closing his eyes, and brushing his lips against yours again.

"Only if you kiss me more often like you did today," he whispered, causing a shiver to run through his entire body "I bet that'll calm me down more than any song I could ever listen to."

© ikeuverse, 2023. do not copy, translate or steal my stories.

[the-head-ancho-chilli]

The Hashira and their Sense of Humor

Apologies for the hiatus! A lot has happened over the last couple of months and I'm finally getting some of them (somewhat) resolved through therapy and A LOT of patience with myself. So here's a post that I written back in October that brings me so much joy! Thank you all for your patience ^^

Word count: 2k~

Mitsuri Kanroji

You know those types of people who want to tell you a really funny story but they need to stop laughing first?

And they've been laughing for the past fifteen minutes?

Yeah that's Mitsuri

I'm not entirely sure what to categorize this either than comedic storytelling

She could probably be a standup comedian too, she has some good stories to tell

But Mitsuri is really in her element when when someone else is telling a mildly amusing story

She will just keep adding onto it to somehow make it even more funnier than it was originally intended

Misturi could make an inside joke between you guys too, she is the designated funny friend of the Hashira

I also feel like she sometimes makes self-deprecating jokes, but not on any serious topics

Like she enjoys poking fun at the fact that she's still single

For an example, Mitsuri and Shinobu could be making an order at a restaurant for lunch

By the time Mitsuri finishes her first round of food and hands the dishes to the waiter, she accidentally drops them causing all the plates and bowls to shatter all over the floor

She tries to help clean up but the staff insists that she shouldn't worry about it

Sitting back down with Shinobu, cheeks red from embarrassment, Mitsuri will crack an awkward smile and say "Yeah, this is why I'm still single!"

Obanai Iguro

Obanai is the most sarcastic motherfucker on this list

I feel like his number one policy is "Don't ask me stupid questions"

He's already annoyed like 70% of the time, just don't annoy him even more

But then again...

"Hey Obanai, did you lose this?" "No I was just playing hide and seek with an inanimate object for fun, YES I fucking dropped it"

"You look really tired, are you doing okay?" "Hell yeah, nothing says healthy like eye bags as dark as my hair"

"Can I pet your snake?" "Yeah you just gotta let him nibble you first but don't worry, he's only venomous"

Usually he's kinda rude about it but he does have his nice moments

"Hey Obanai, can you pass me that?" Obanai will just say no but hand and just hand it to you anyways

Some people just don't understand sarcasm all the time and that's when he kinda runs into some trouble

Obanai and Kyojuro were walking to a meeting together, but Obanai had forgotten his jacket AND haori

It was quite chilly outside too, so poor Obanai was shivering while trying to keep Kaburamaru warm

Kyojuro asked Obanai "My friend, winter is coming! Aren't you cold?"

Obanai deadpanned and said "Of course not, I'm just practicing my acting. Glad to see that my shivering is that convincing"

"How interesting! Maybe you should audition for a play at the theatre!"

Obanai's annoyance kept him warm for the rest of the day

Tengen Uzui

Quite an obvious statement, but Tengen’s humor mainly comprises of sex jokes and innuendos

The man has three wives, of course he would find that shit funny

Like he will be in the middle of a meeting, and everyone will line up to receive some gifts from Kagaya

He will say "Come in a straight line, my students"

Tengen will chuckle and say "That's what she said"

Tengen is also the type to be "gay with the homies" and loves to embarrass Sanemi and Obanai by making jokes about being in love or hooking up with them

He chooses specifically those two because it felt awkward to make the jokes to Gyomei

Tengen once spent forty-five minutes explaining to Kyojuro that he didn't actually want to buy him dinner after Kyojuro gave him a genuinely offended look to the highest degree

"How deceitful of you, Tengen"

He pretty much wrote off saying jokes like that to Kyojuro following that incident, but he really can't help himself sometimes

I don't think that Tengen solely has generic innuendos he uses on everyone, he likes testing what SPECIFIC category of sex jokes makes people uncomfortable

Like if Giyu goes to the bathroom, Tengen will saunter up with a finger gun on his chin and ask "Pissing all by yourself, handsome?"

Everyone is throwing their shoes at him

Sanemi Shinazugawa

Of course this sadistic bastard likes slapstick, what we’re you thinking?

He may be good at holding in a laugh, but you can still see that stupid smirk on his face if anyone stumbles

One time Tengen's six foot ass fell face first while running late to a meeting

Sanemi actually struggled to keep his composure that day, he had to bite his lips together to hide the uncontrollable grin on his face

People getting smacked upside the head, tripping others, people getting violently angry, Sanemi loves it all

He refuses to admit that Zenitsu is funny

Now a regular civilian is one thing, but children getting roughed up is another

there was a particular incident where Sanemi had come across some kids swinging on a tree branch near a market he occasionally visited

This week ass branch definitely didn't have the strength to hold up any of those kids

So Sanemi did what any sane person would, and stuck around to watch this disaster happen

Well unfortunately for this one child, the branch snapped mid-swing and fell right on their face

And there was Sanemi, a hand over his stomach from laughing at these dumb kids

He didn't even stop to help them or anything, just calmed down from laughing so hard and walked away to continue shopping

Shinobu Kocho

An absolute queen of insult humor

Even Sanemi can’t beat Shinobu at her best

Do you even think she would stick with the basic ass jokes? Of course not

She can be an absolute menace if she really wants to

Shinobu is just tired of everyone's shit, and she can get even more exhausted from putting on that smile nearly as much as Kyojuro

She just can't keep up

Which brings me to my main point, which is that Shinobu's funny side usually comes out in rants or vents with the people closest to her

She and Mitsuri both express their humor by storytelling, Shinobu's just originates more from anger an annoyance rather than an effort to be entertaining

Regardless of who Shinobu's around, everyone can tell that when she walks through the door with steam coming out of her ears, everyone's gonna be laughing their asses off

As anyone can agree if they've worked in any form of customer service, there are some days where you are so damn close to breaking your cool

When Tengen got placed in the Butterfly Estate's infirmary, Shinobu was actually going to kill a patient instead of saving them for once

Like this man was just demanding shit and teasing his friend left and right, and Aoi had never been so afraid of her mentor in her entire life

Aoi tried to calm her down, "Sticks and stones Shinobu, don't let him get to you!"

Tengen only snickered

Ooooo, she lost her shit

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but PLEASE. FUCK. OFF"

Angy Shinobu is best Shinobu

Kyojuro Rengoku

Look me in the eyes and tell me Kyojuro doesn’t like puns

I know you can't do it

He will howl with laughter nearly every time you tell him a pun

"Hey Kyo, you're never gonna believe it! Remember my friend with a bakery? Well it just burned down!"

At first he'll show genuine concern, politely shouting "How unfortunate!"

"Don't worry about it, his business is toast"

Give him a minute...

"Ahahaha! Good one!"

Not only does he like being told puns, but if he has a good opportunity to tell a well timed pun he will not stop giggling until he tells it

One time you, Tengen, Mitsuri, and Kyojuro were all trying to decide where to eat after a long day of work

At one point Tengen suggested hotpot, even offering to take you all to one that Makio and Suma liked

Kyojuro tried muffling his laughing, but his attention was redirected when you asked him what he thought of the idea

Finally able to cease his giggles, Kyojuro proudly shouted "SOUPER"

It doesn't matter if you find the joke funny or not, Kyojuro's laughter is so contagious that you're dying at the silly pun

What a fucking dork <3

Giyu Tomioka

If there was a form of comedy that’s applicable at any given moment, Giyu would use it on a daily basis

Luckily for him, Giyu discovered it very quicky and refuses to let the tactic go

That's right, Giyu is physically incapable of stopping himself from making a "your mom" joke

Everyone can blame Obanai for that one

Quite literally at any opportunity, Giyu will mutter the phrase under his breath

Unfortunately, because it has become such an unconscious thing for Giyu, this bad habit of his ends up kicking his ass at the worst of times

with all due respect to Giyu's efforts, it just makes him unintentionally funny

in an awkward way

Giyu visited one of his favourite restaurants on his day off, the waiter asked "Is there anything else you would like, sir?" after giving his order

Now Giyu didn't mean it, he really didn't

It just slipped out of his mouth so easily

"Your mom"

Let me tell you, the silence was absolutely deafening

After the two stared at each other in mutual confusion, Giyu just wordlessly left due to the sheer embarrassment and awkwardness he had caused

He tried to go back, truly, Giyu made the effort and walked through the door

But he made uncomfortable eye contact with that same waiter and walked out

He hasn't gone back to that restaurant since ;,)

Gyomei Himijima

I have already established in my Gyomei Headcannons post that Gyomei is the dad friend of the Hashira (go check out that post if you haven’t btw ^^)

So of course he's going to make dad jokes, everyone saw this coming

God forbid you ever complain around him, he will see it as an opportunity (usually)

"Man, I'm really hungry" Gyomei will hand you a bento box and say "Hi hungry, I'm prepared

He is THAT GUY that makes "I haven't seen you since last year!" jokes

Every single year without fail

Shockingly, Gyomei and Kyojuro will bond over their mutual love for super corny jokes

One time while training Genya, Gyomei asked him "Child, what is long and sticky?"

Genya paused his routine to think for a moment, slightly disturbed by the question

"I don't know what you- fresh mochi?" Gyomei shook his head

Genya made a claw gesture with his hands, knowing Gyomei couldn't see it

"No idea, what's long and sticky?"

Gyomei gave a small, sly smile before responding

"A stick, little one"

To be honest, Gyomei's jokes do annoy some of the Hashira whenever he makes them (mainly Shinobu, Obanai and Tengen)

Normally because he's so calm about it

Tengen usually is one to lose his temper over it though

"You really got a joke for about everything, huh?" "Indeed I do, Tengen. I even have one about construction"

Tengen's eye will twitch as he taunts Gyomei "Oh yeah? Well let's hear it then!"

"I'm afraid I can't, my friend. I'm still working on it"

Kyojuro's laugh echoes throughout the meeting as Tengen realizes he most definitely walked into that one

Muichiro Tokito

His sense of humor is weird

That’s all I have, anything that Muichiro finds funny is actually kinda strange

He does this thing where he will go in with a fistbump, but change it to a high five last second

Muichiro can do it the other way around too, but regardless it results in this silly fist-five thing that makes him chuckle

He's a little bit of a devious child so his sense of humor kinda comes from whatever will annoy the other Hashira

Sometimes he will sit in the middle of a meeting and just blow raspberries while spacing out a little

It annoys the fuck out of Sanemi and Obanai because Muichiro's spit gets EVERYWHERE

Even Giyu thinks that kid comes with his own splash zone

He's not one for pranks per say, but he likes reaping a bit of terror amongst the other Hashira

One time Muichiro stole Tengen's red eyeliner one weekend purely for entertainment

the next day when everyone showed up to the meeting, people got to witness a very distressed Tengen

Holding up Sanemi and Obanai midair by the collar of their shirts, Tengen interrogated the both of them where they hid his shockingly expensive liner

Of course no one would suspect the slobbering kid, who was inconspicuously blowing raspberries

Had anyone asked Muichiro if he saw Tengen's liner, Muichiro would turn to the fuming man and giggle

Secretly, Aoi is Muichiro's unknowing accomplice in these scenarios

"Here Aoi, could you hold this for a while?" "Uhh, sure? What is it for?" "Hmm? Oh nothing..."

Don't underestimate this little shit

꒷꒦˚︶︶꒦꒷︶꒷꒦˚ ꒷꒦˚︶︶꒦꒷︶꒷꒦˚ ꒷꒦˚︶︶꒦꒷︶꒷꒦˚

Hey y’all! Hope you liked this post, it was such a pleasure to write it ^^

I’m hoping that now I’ll be able to write more for this blog now that I have more time, and I have more posts lined up in the future :)

Ask box and requests are still open, just please read the rules before submitting anything!

[lovingseventeen]

Hey, Zin! Hope you're healthy and doing fine! May I request a post about what would svt do when they have a crush on someone? This idea just popped up in my mind in a broad daylight, and I think you're the perfect writer for this 🥰

svt when they have a crush

a/n: i wrote this in a svt x you pov, i hope that's fine :))

seungcheol: 

❀ offers to do anything and everything for his crush

❀ he sees you struggling to open a water bottle? he's ever so casually speed walking to open it for you

❀ you're about to open a door for yourself? no you're not!

❀ "oh! i got it" he'll tell you, holding the door with a strong hand as he watches you leave the room

❀ tries to be brave but the second his you lean into his face slightly (maybe even just to tease him) he's soft like putty

jeonghan:

❀ teases, teases, and teases his crush but in a very lighthearted way

❀ maybe the two of you are hanging out and casually playing basketball

❀ if you miss he's all "ayy, why are you doing it like that" but he's so smiley as he watches you

❀ but in the end he tries to help you out, but ALSO uses this as a moment to flex how good he is

joshua: 

❀ charms the hell out of his crush

❀ light touches on your arms when you're talking, a hand on your back as you walk through a crowd so he doesn't lose you, casually leaning in to hear you speak a little clearer

❀ but of course he'll never cross a boundary he knows about

❀ idk i feel like he just knows how to make someone fall for him too

❀ his stomach may be tumbling whenever you smile at him but you'd have no idea

jun: 

❀ somewhat gaslights himself into thinking that he doesn't have that much of a crush

❀ but the members do catch him searching for your name in the list of who liked his most recent post

❀ "do you think i look okay in this? so why they didn't like the picture?"

❀ "bro you posted it two minutes ago, they literally probably haven't seen it yet"

hoshi: 

❀ he's always the life of any gathering, but he does get uncharacteristically quiet when you're around

❀ doesn't really know how to start a conversation (case in point - think of how he was handing stuff out at their concert that one time)

❀ but if you're eating together he does place a couple of extra things on your plate

❀ "you should have this"

❀ will also get very pink if you return the gesture LOL

wonwoo: 

❀ you'd miss it if you weren't observant

❀ but he does think of you a lot and he does small gestures that show it

❀ maybe he was walking by a shop and saw a small keychain he thought you'd like

❀ "you mentioned this show right? i saw this the other day and thought of you" he tells you

❀ he loves seeing you light up over the little keychain and he smiles whenever he sees it on your bag knowing he got it for you

woozi:

❀ will avoid you for the longest time because he feels like his stomach somersaults every time he sees you

❀ but one day he can't take it anymore and he'll blurt it out directly because he feels like he might just explode if he holds it in any longer

dokyeom: 

❀ never actually announces that he has a crush on you but every single one of his members has heard ENOUGH about you that they know

❀ finds himself bringing you up in half of his conversations and he can't stop it

❀ "did you guys see y/n's post? they look so pretty in it..."

❀ he likes all of your stories where you're in the photo somehow- whether it's a selfie, a picture with a friend, or you showing off an outfit

❀ "you know what y/n said to me? they said they liked my new hair" he'll hum (he'll think about that compliment for a week)

❀ for someone who mentions you a lot he gets weirdly quiet when you're around and his members get their revenge by pointing it out LOL

mingyu:

❀ puppy vibes ofc - i had to do it

❀ thinks he's being subtle with how often he's glancing at his crush but he kind of isn't

❀ listens so intently when you talk, but he doesn't realize that you notice the sparkle in his eyes when he looks at you

❀ gets so pouty when he bakes a bunch of cookies and his members eat all of it before he gets to give you one

minghao:

❀ someone who actually succeeds in being subtle LOL

❀ always makes sure you’re walking on the inside of the sidewalk type of guy

❀ casually never lets you pay for anything

❀ “i got it, don’t worry about it” whenever you two eat out

❀ eventually confesses in the perfect setting and perfect timing in private too - just so you don’t feel pressured either

seungkwan: 

❀ someone who'll win you a plushie at a carnival game or one of those claw machines

❀ “y/n watch this” he’ll tell you, seemingly confident in his athletic ability (secretly he’s freaking out) at one of those carnival games where you just have to shoot a basketball

❀ “so here’s the technique for these machines” he’ll also say, as he presses the button that signals for the claw to drop

❀ maybe you go home with 2 plushies that day, or 7

vernon: 

❀ awkward but cute laughs when you make a joke

❀ i feel like he'll compliment you in a very vernon way???

❀ "your jacket looks big on you, but in a cool way"

❀ "oh is this hairstyle new?" "oh yeah it is" *he just does a thumbs up*

chan:

❀ will try to do some kind of dance move or impersonation of michael jackson or something to impress you but it leads to him falling over

❀ he’s about to go home and delete his social media when he hears your laugh

❀ but he also sees that it’s not a mean one, and that you’re hurrying over to crouch next to him

❀ “okay king of pop” you tease, “are you okay though?”

❀ great, just when he thinks he can’t get any more smitten :’)

[aangarchy]

Netflix atla live action review ep 4-6

So, they completely ruined Bumi. Spoiler warning.

The more episodes pass by the more confused i get with the choices that were made. I wrote down commentary for the episodes and the thing that i wrote down the most was "why does this happen?". The writing is incredibly confusing and messy, feels too rushed in some spaces and too slow in others. There's just... so much going on and so little at the same time. They brought in elements that in the OG don't get introduced until later in s1, s2, the comics, or even the legend of Korra. The reason these things get introduced so early here is not clear at all, because they don't serve any purpose other than to be an obstacle to Aang, Sokka and Katara on their way to the North.

Mai and Ty Lee are.. there. They get introduced earlier but they don't serve any purpose at the moment other than stand around, watch Azula train, ask questions so that Azula can give us the answers the viewer needs. My guess is they only got introduced for the audience who watched the OG to go "oh we know them!". We get the secret tunnel story earlier too, but it has absolutely nothing to do with love. Somehow "love is brightest in the dark" now correlates to the badgermoles being able to sense a human's emotion. It's a waste of a storyline, doesn't teach us anything about love, gives us Omashu lore which is useless bc neither Sokka nor Katara actually use love to escape the tunnels. Also Oma and Shu are lesbians now, but you only know that bc they changed Shu's pronouns. Wow, so progressive! We have lesbians in the story now! Boy do i feel represented as a sapphic!

We get Koh early on as well, but his entire gig got changed. Now suddenly he doesn't steal faces but he "feeds", and hunts using the fog of lost souls (which is tlok lore mind you) as a tool to trap humans. We introduce the mother of faces (comic book lore!), or rather pendant of her that Koh owns. There's no reason for her to exist in this story though other than to be an easter egg to everyone who read the search (Not even the majority of the fandom!) and to offer a solution to this problem we've created, which is Koh capturing our friends in order to eat them and us not being able to convince him into letting them go. There's no feeling of dread in the Koh scenes at all because the whole problem of not showing emotion is just not a thing now. No suspense, no fear, just a weird cgi clown face worm. The worm doesn't even menacingly circle around Aang to invoke a feeling of being surrounded, it just sits there. I also just don't understand why Koh is here already bc now who is going to give us information about Tui and La?

This decision also creates a problem that Hei Bai's story just isn't about Hei Bai anymore. We get fed a few lines from a talking fox about how the forest spirit got hurt, but there's really no solution? Aang buries a pinecone in front of the statue and tells him not to give up hope but he didn't even really need to do that, because Hei Bai wasn't the one kidnapping villagers! It was Koh. Why did we appease Hei Bai if Koh was the real villain? Hei Bai/Koh's story leads us to Roku, but Roku is completely useless. All he does is undermine Kyoshi's advice to Aang, tell Aang about the mother of faces pendant so he can appease Koh, and then we leave. I knew in advance Roku wasn't going to warn Aang about the comet here bc Albert Kim already told us working with a deadline like that with child actors is just impossible. But with Roku suddenly not being Aang's main Avatar guide he just gets nothing to do. There's no suspense in this part of the story either, bc the time limit of the winter solstice isn't a thing here at all. Aang also ends up flying over Fire Nation borders without issue, and gets led right into the sanctuary without the puzzle of figuring out how to open the door, and without the problem of Zhao's soldiers waiting for him when he comes out. It creates this issue of there not being any excitement, at least for me. I genuinely am getting a bit bored with the show, which was never an issue with the OG for me. There's a reason all of this extra material didn't get introduced until later on. There's too many characters and they all get too little time to really do anything useful, they're not fleshed out, the stories aren't thought through and it ends up getting very confusing and boring. I'm genuinely curious for the perspective of people who have never watched the OG cartoon, bc i wonder if they're even able to follow along without prior knowledge of this universe.

Bumi is just... not Bumi. They completely changed his character to be this bitter old senile man that resents Aang for abandoning the world. This doesn't make any sense because in this version of the story Bumi shouldn't know that Aang is the Avatar at all, because Aang was told right before he disappeared! So why does Bumi immediately know that Aang is the Avatar, and why does Aang immediately recognize him? Also the original point of Bumi's tests is to get Aang to approach fights and puzzles from a different angle, so he can learn versatility as the Avatar. But here the tests are just happening because Bumi is mad at Aang for leaving and wants to get back at him for being gone so long. He says some lines about Aang having to learn to make hard choices and you can't rely on your friends, but Aang ends up proving him wrong in the end! What is even the point of Bumi's part in the story now, except for him just being another obstacle on the way to the North Pole?

There's a lot of instances where I feel like the bond between characters gets completely lost. We barely spend any time with the side characters like the mechanist, Teo, Jet and the freedom fighters, and the people in the spirit village. It makes some scenes feel very out of place. These storylines all happen at once, and they don't get their individual moments to shine. We have no room to feel betrayed by Jet or Sai, because we barely got to know them to begin with. Jet and Sai only spend time with One member of the gaang each, but when their betrayals come to light the rest of the group acts devastated, as if it was their dear friend. Sokka also gets really mad about the Jet thing, but he only met Jet once when he smuggled them into Omashu, and Jet didn't even tell Sokka his name. He said it afterwards when Katara met him again. It makes absolutely no sense why Sokka is yelling at Katara for trusting Jet only bc she finds him attractive, when Sokka wasn't even there during all of that!

The sense of family between the gaang that we get from the original also just doesn't happen here. Especially because these characters so far have spent more time apart than together. Aang constantly gets separated from Sokka and Katara, leaving no room for them to bond. We get Katara and Sokka bonding, but they shouldn't need those types of scenes because they're already siblings (which isn't very clear in the show either btw!). I ended up forgetting that Sokka and Katara were trapped by Koh, bc we spend so much time away from them (a whole episode, which is now an hour!).

I have little to no criticism for the Blue Spirit story. Want to guess why that is? Bc they left it pretty much untouched. We even get a little bit of an extra scene, with Zuko and Aang talking while Zuko recovers after getting hurt during the escape. I liked this choice, especially bc it highlights how conflicted Zuko is.

This is where we get Zuko's backstory. I have one question here: why did they make Ozai more sensible and less ruthless? Was that a Daniel Dae Kim decision? Bc it feels like a Daniel Dae Kim thing to do. They're very on the nose with the way Ozai is abusing Zuko and Azula, but then they turn around and make this man visit Zuko after he burned him and praise Zuko about finding the Avatar. I understand that they did this to show how Ozai uses Zuko's accomplishments in order to push Azula, but even if it were to do that: the original Ozai would NEVER. The problem here as well is that they don't let the viewers draw any conclusions themselves anymore. They're holding the viewer's hand through the whole thing, leaving no room for nuance or doubt.

I just finished episode 7 and 8 and I have Things To Say. None of which are good. Writing it down is challenging so it might take a day or two.

[krizariel]

Oh don't tell me... you are f*cking my ex?!

(crack, not-fic, jaytim with past timsteph) Talking with friends about how a friend - who was into jaytim and was a tim fan before he was even registered in my radar - unintentionally got me into jaytim; but then he moved on pretty much as I came in and now he has to put up with me and my never-ending duck giggling butt emojis. Or how he eloquently put it: "I'm literally like a tragic dramatic irony mythical Greek MC, just a plaything of fate" Anyway, I remembered this vague idea and then this took shape:

No-capes AU in which Tim was never adopted by Bruce, but the rest (including Steph and Jason) were. Jason is very protective of his family, especially his sisters. And yes, Steph is a gremlin and gets in trouble more often than not, but damn it no one messes with his sister.

Tim and Steph started dating during mid-school; Tim tends to be asked out more often than not and he has trouble saying no. Often times he does not feel truly attracted to anyone; but he does not want to be seen as uptight or impolite or worse... questioned. He often accepts his dates until eventually they get bored of him. Steph was a change of pace of him and at some point he genuinely was feeling attraction to her; but maybe not to the extent she deserved. She asked him out and was always the one initiating anything, and he'd often go along with it. She was amazing, full of life, funny and so pretty; Tim didn't know what exactly she saw in him. However, she'd quickly notice his lack of enthusiasm/interest and often they'd fight. Why say yes when you aren't truly into it? They were on and off for a year until they broke things off for real. Jason of course hated Tim's guts; be that way whatever, but making his sister cry and mistreating her was a different story. After breaking up, Tim tried to reach out to Steph later, to try and explain himself better and be honest with her. She deserved that much. Except Jason found him before Tim could reach his sister; punched him hard enough to send him off-balance, grabbed him and pushed him against the wall to make it very clear he should not get near his sister again or else... (and Tim was scared to shit because danger danger but also creepily turned on when Jason grabbed him and raised him off the floor so easily. He needs to consult a therapist as to why Jason threatening turned him on and somehow that started his bi awakening) Eventually Steph and Tim moved on with their lives, continue dating other people, and given that they still have friends they reconnect, reminiscence of the past and talk it out. They also eventually come out and bond over both being bi. Fast forward years later, neither Tim or Jason had seen each other again; but Tim stays in touch with Steph. Tim is a well known editor at a big publisher and Jay is an aspiring book writer. Steph had given Tim her brother's original novel draft and he actually loved it. Steph: So, remember my brother Jason? Tim: Your hot brother who kicked my ass in front of half the school hates my guts? how could I forget. Steph: Yeah! He is the one who wrote this fabulous piece. Think you can help him? Tim *internally trying not to scream because what are the odds*: ...Sure. If he agrees to meet, I have time tomorrow. But you better be there, in case he remembers he told me not to get near you. I fear for my life. Steph: Don't be dramatic, he probably doesn't even remember you.

---- Steph: Sooo... I have a friend who is an editor at X publisher. He read your work and loved it. He actually thinks it has high chances to be published. Jason: Really? Steph: Yeah! Told him we could meet with him tomorrow for coffee and go over the details. Jason: Wait who is this friend? Do I know him? Steph: Well... remember this boyfriend I had back in mid-school... Jason, as he stops what he is doing, turns to Steph and glares: The one I hit and pushed against the wall and told to never get near you ever again? That one? Steph: Yes! Jason: Wait, he got actually near you again? *starts cracking knuckles* Steph: Yes, but not that way! I wouldn't take that human disaster for a ride and I'd pity anyone who'd date him. Plus I'm perfect with Cass, thank you very much. But we made peace long time ago and we've been good friends since. I'm sure he doesn't hold grudges, after all he knows the work is yours and had no trouble! It's been years, we have all grown up and moved on.

Jason: Fine. ---- The meeting was awkward at the beginning (especially due to Jason's perpetual scowl) but Tim is clearly very professional and jumps right into business. They exchange contact information. It's clear Tim genuinely likes Jason's work. He puts a lot of effort in navigating Jason through the process, giving detailed comments/notes and Jason is happy to see someone catching on the little details and talk excitedly about them. May not be much but internally he is preening. They start meeting often for coffee, at first they'd talk more about work rather than chitchat and then their meetings started evolving into less work and more random talk, getting to know each other. Sometimes they don't finish talking about the book because they got too distracted. Tim opens up about his teen years, how he was (and still is) too dumb for relationships. He didn't know better but as he matured he learned to accept himself. Jason realizes Tim wasn't that bad of a guy as he thought; just someone making mistakes, learning and growing.

Tim finds he hasn't enjoyed someone's company in a while. He has dated guys before and has matured enough to be better and accept what he wants. But as years went by he poured himself into work and has been so busy, he doesn't exactly have lasting relationships so he stopped altogether. This time around, he feels like he genuinely is giving his all. He decides that he will see that Jason's book becomes a reality because Jason is talented, he is amazing and deserves this. And then, he will gather the courage and ask him out. Jason is also troubled because he is developing a fat crush on his sister's ex and he did NOT see that coming.

The day Jason's book is finally out, they celebrate and Tim asks Jason out on a date. ----

Later: Steph: SMH I can't believe you! Jason: ... it's your fault

[akisunlovesnalu]

Every Witch Way

A fic that I wrote inspired by this photo. Originally I wanted it to become a detective fic but my brain spiraled and I ended up with this. It became an adventure mystery story and of course, the government hates them :) I liked the idea of them traveling through the desert and I'm not too sure where the guild fit in this but just know that all Magicians (Witches) are in hiding because society believes they are evil. Most normal people do not have magic so someone spread a theory that the only reason witches have magic is because of human sacrifices etc. It's important to note that witches want to keep their powers under wraps or else they will get reported to the authorities and sent to the hier-ups in the capital. Nobody knows what happens to the witches who are caught but they don't want to find out.

That might be some unnecessary background information so skip over that if you wish and enjoy!

When Lucy finds herself kidnapped by a ruthless group of bandits, the last thing she expects is to be saved by a witch with Pink hair and his talking blue cat. And she most certainly didn't expect to become their good friend and travel companion. Who knew evil sorcerers and government conspiracies can lead to unexpected friendships.

As the blond girl dragged herself, hands tied together in front of her, and sand covered bare feet weakly trailing after her, she realized how fast camels might actually be. You see, in all of the stories she had read so far, none of them did the four legged beast's speed any justice. They never quite described how hard it was to keep up with them. It was always “The creature was big” or “The creature was furry” but never “When kidnapped by a group of bandits, tied to and forced to stumble behind a literal camel, it may be hard to keep up.”

See if any of the books had written that in, maybe Lucy Hearfillia might be faring better in her situation. But alas, she was not.

“Stop lagging behind, blondie!” One of the men snarled, pulling on the rope to further demonstrate his annoyance. Lucy stumbled forward, struggling to stay upright. She hung her head low, very aware of the menacingly bright sun and quietly sighed.

Oh what she would do to somehow get out of this unfortunate turn of events.

She has probably been traveling together with these no good thieves for about 3 hours. After being abducted from the only good town in this godforsaken desert, the men forced her to follow them, ignoring her cries of where she was and demands to let her go. She gave up eventually of course. Not even her vocal cords could handle the immense heat that came with the dry deserted area.

“Hey boss.” The big one said, glancing over at her with furrowed brows. He had been the one to capture her in the first place. Of course Lucy could have easily taken him on but… a moment's hesitation was all they needed to successfully tie her up and steal her ring of keys. Aquarius was going to kill her!

 “Not that I really want to, but... Should we give the chick some water?” 

The man in front of the big one grunted, his blueish hair blowing with the small breeze and clearly showing off his strange X-like tattoo. Lucy watched on with little interest as a bead of sweat traveled down his forehead.

“I wouldn’t bother.” He scoffed. “Every time we’ve tried, she just spits it back up. Plus, earlier she tried to bite off Javier’s finger, do you really want to risk it?” He raised an eyebrow.

The man in question made a whining noise, clutching his injured hand to his chest and glaring at their prisoner with watery eyes. He mockingly raised the water bottle to his mouth, chugging it in an attempt to get a rise out of her. Lucy rolled her eyes, instead looking back down at the smooth sand beneath her feet.

The big one made a noise of understanding. “Even after we lied about it not being drugged too-”

Javier spit up the water that he was previously chugging, shakily putting the top back on and storing it back inside of the camel's holding bag.

“You idiot!” ‘Boss’ hissed, turning a piercing glare unto the man beside him. “She still didn’t know-” He paused, glancing over at their very interested prisoner and forced himself to  take a deep breath. “You know what, it doesn't matter, she'll be fine.”

“But, Bora-”

“She’ll be fine!” The man who Lucy now knew as Bora raised a fist threateningly. He smirked in sick pleasure as his henchmen coward away. Before she even had time to pull a face of disgust, he turned to Lucy, eyeing her hungrily. “Now, let's get a move on. The employer is expecting us by sundown and I'd rather not have the sun beating down on me any longer than necessary.”

The rest of his men tiredly murmured in agreement, picking up the pace and forcing the blond girl to — once again —trudge through the slippery sand. She hissed as her feet pricked on some sort of stick-like plant. Oh Mavis if she could just reach into the pouch hanging off of Bora’s belt-

“I don’t see the issue, it’s not even that hot.” A new voice said, startling the crew of 14 bandits plus Lucy herself. Her head snapped up for the first time in a while. Ignoring the ache in her neck, the girl rapidly searched the area until settling upon a man with… pink hair. 

He didn’t look too shocked to see a kidnapped girl tied to a Camel. Nor did he bat an eye at the blue cat that sat on his head, lazily playing with the goggles that held his hair out of his face (Did she mention that it was pink!?). And his attire looked so incredibly… bold that Lucy was sure she would faint. Seriously, who was stupid enough to travel through the desert in a black long sleeve shirt, a tan vest and a literal scarf. It was like the guy was begging to get a heat stroke.

She had immediately decided that whoever this man was, he was insane.

“Now.” He grinned, getting into a fighting stance. “What was it you said about an employer?”

Oh look now he wanted to fight off an entire group of bandits. Lucy scoffed. Definitely insane.

Where did he even come from?

Bora snarled, holding up a hand and signaling his guys to pounce on the man wearing freaking cargo pants. Once again, the pink haired freak didn’t even flinch. He stayed rooted to his spot, grinning a wide smile and daring one of them to come at him.

They did, of course, and to Lucy’s surprise were blasted back by a large ring of— 

“Fire!”

Well that certainly explains a lot.

Even after that big scare, the men were back on “Mr. cargo pants” as soon as Bora sent each and every one of them a snarl. The blond snorted as soon enough, all 14 men were on the floor, some of them even halfway in the sand and halfway not.

Bora’s horrified face soon turned back into a scowl as he fully processed Lucy’s teasing. He jumped off of the Camel, ignoring a curious looking “Mr. cargo pants” and stomping over to her. 

“Something Funny?” He said.

“Yeah, actually.” She chuckled some more, tugging on the rope in silent frustration. “Looks like you're about to get your ass handed to you.”

Bora growled, raising his hand in an attempt to threaten her. Lucy eye’d it wearily, but made no attempt to move out of its path. To her pleasure that seemed to aggravate the man even more.

“I’ll show you!” He cried and Lucy's breath hitched as he brought his hand down to strike her across the face… 

The sound of skin hitting skin somehow echoed throughout the desert and Lucy was sure her face was stinging a bright red…

Except it wasn’t… to be honest she felt no pain. Almost as if she hadn’t been hit at all… Cracking her eyes open she realized that a figure stood in front of her, effectively blocking both the sun and her view of Bora. At this, the girl was finally able to piece together what happened.

Bora had aimed for her face, only for his wrist to be caught by “Mr. cargo pants” himself. 

What an interesting turn of events indeed. 

Lucy was quite surprised by how calm she was in this type of situation. No other girl would be able to keep a straight face as they were surrounded in an alleyway, tied up, and forced onto a camel, only to be saved by a strange man (who was definitely insane) that kicked ass and breathed fire. Though if anything she’d have to blame it on experience.

The silence was interrupted by a snarl, one almost inhuman. Bora shrieked, snatching his hand away and forcibly putting a distance between him and this insane man.

“H-how dare you!” Bora shrieked, reaching into his belt and pulling out a knife. Lucy’s eyes flashed onto the leather pouch before giving the man a hard glare.

“You’re one of those demons aren't you!” His voice shook but was filled with so much venom. “The horrible bastards that turn to rituals and blood sacrifices in favor of magical powers!?”

Mr. Cargo pants made no attempt to move, only stared Bora straight in the eyes with an unreadable expression. 

“So what if I am?” He answered.

Lucy felt her lips turn into a frown.

“Then you’re worse than me!” The man laughed maniacally, waving his knife around as he spoke. “Why bother saving this chick with magic earned by bloodlust? Wait…” He gasped dramatically looking at Lucy and then back at Mr. Cargo pants. 

“Oh…” he cackled this time, using a shaky hand to clutch his side. “You probably need her right? For another sacrifice?”

As he continued with his dumb speach Lucy felt her patience slipping. She bit her lip, tugging on the rope once again with no success. She growled, now desperate enough to be pulling against the weight of a freaking Camel.

“Let’s make a deal, hm?” Bora held the knife to his mouth in thought. “I’ll let you take her for just a bit of cash. I’m sure you and your demon friends would love such delicate, pure hearted prey right? Blah Blah Blah Blah-”

Lucy tuned him out and her pink-haired savior still made no move to attack, only balling his fists and taking deep breaths. She understood… the need to prove him wrong… to just shut him up! Which was what she was planning on doing! As soon as she got rid of this stupid rope-

Her savior lunged, slapping the knife out of the bandit's hand and catching him by the neck so quickly that Lucy had to blink, just to make sure she had actually witnessed that.

Bora struggled against his grip, clawing at his arm as he gasped for breath. “Y-you…” He coughed. “You monster!”

The pink haired boy dropped him, cracking his knuckles as Bora attempted to crawl away.

“Hit me with your best shot!” He screeched. “Monster!” 

And that’s when Lucy’s attention was directed towards a flying blue blob. It took her a minute to realize that the blue blob was the cat previously perched atop her savior's head. She couldn’t help the small shriek that erupted from her throat as the cat landed directly in front of her, a look of pride overtaking its face.

“Hold on!” It cried, using its claws to slowly cut away at the thick rope. Lucy stood stock still, mouth wide as she watched a cat! a talking cat, free her from her ‘Camel Prison’... 

This day just kept getting weirder and weirder. 

She felt the rope loosen up and took that moment to slip her hands free.

She rubbed her wrists, absentmindedly thanking the (blue, flying, taking-) cat and zoning back in on the fight. Well… what she thought would be a fight. Instead, Lucy saw Mr. Cargo Pants kneeling by a tied up and unconscious Bora, checking his pulse with a bored look in his eyes.

The girl wanted to laugh at how quickly that ‘battle’ had ended. In fact, she did laugh! How could she not? Here was Bora, big bandit leader with unquestionable power over his 14 lakey’s, beaten black and blue after a fight that had barely even lasted a minute.

Pathetic.

Lucy was almost ashamed to have put her morals over her own safety. Taking on this guy would have been a sinch, the rest would have probably run away with their tails between their legs. 

The girl released a breath, finally finished with her laughing fit. She wiped a tear from beneath her eye, grinning wide at her two saviors.

“You’ve got guts!” The cat… the blue, flying, talking cat.. Spoke. It spoke… Lucy felt her face twist in confusion.

“Thank you…?”

Mr. Cargo pants finished tying up the rest of the men and strode over to them, his arms crossed over his chest as he gave her a somewhat proud look. “Happy’s right y’know. I’ve never seen another girl in your situation stand up to their captor…” He paused before quietly adding. “Well maybe Erza but I doubt she’d get captured in the first place…”

“Happy’s?” Lucy questioned, raising her brow. “What do you mean?”

“That’s Happy.” He stated matter factly, pointing over to the flying cat- Holy Mavis, this would take some getting used to. It waved. Lucy numbly waved back.

Mr. Cargo Pants held out his hand in greeting. “And I’m Natsu!” Oh well that’s good, he’s got a name. Mr. Cargo Pants was starting to seem a bit bland based on his earlier performance. Maybe she’d just call him Fire Freak, pyromaniac for short?

“Hey Natsu.” The girl smiled kindly, getting over her initial shock and shaking his hand. He held onto her hand for longer than necessary, his grip strong. The pink-haired traveler held her gaze, dark onyx eyes practically burning into her soul. His calloused hand gave her own one last squeeze before he let go, looking around as if nothing just happened.

“What're you doing this far out in the desert anyways?”

Lucy blinked, her brain taking a minute to compute after his strange display of… comradery? “I was… Traveling.” She admitted.

“With them?” Natsu and Happy blinked, looking back at the pile of motionless body’s. Finally the boy turned back to her, shaking his head and clicking his teeth. “Man, you need to get yourself some better travel companions.”

“N-no!” She barked. “I was kidnapped while traveling! Are you an idiot!”

“Well why didn’t you just say so?”

Lucy ground her teeth in frustration. One more word out of this man’s mouth and she’d be wanted for murder. She rolled her eyes. What a scatter brain.

“Well, thank you for saving me.” She settled with, surveying the litter of body’s decorating the wide desert floor. “Can I ask you to direct me towards the closest town?”

Natsu nodded his head, pointing in a direction. “We’re actually headed to one right now. Care to join?”

“... Sure!” Lucy agreed after a bit of hesitation. She turned around and untied her very important pouch from her precious Camel Captor. 

“Thanks for keeping these safe, I guess.” She said to it. The camel snorted out a noise of disinterest as Lucy stroked it’s neck. 

Natsu let out a snort, turning away and whistling casually as Lucy sent him a hard glare. She may have been forcefully tied to and painfully dragged across the desert by this Camel, but still, she felt a sense of comradery between them. She was going to miss him…

As Lucy turned to leave, the camel let out a large glob of spit, barely missing her head. The girl shrieked and ran to catch up to a curious Natsu.

She takes it back. That damn animal won't be missed. Not one bit.

[bulkyphrase]

Cap-IM Rec Week - Smut Saturday

Day 6 of @cap-ironman's rec week event! Today's recommendations feature a lot of lovely porn. And maybe some plot sometimes, as a treat.

And if you like subby and/or bottom Steve, check out my previous Stony smut rec list too.

Automated Fantasy by IOnlyWriteWhenCarmelyzed (MCU, Explicit, 1,711 words)

Summary: Steve gets bent over by one of Tony's Iron Man suits

Cherry Ride by copperbadge (@copperbadge) (MCU, Explicit, 12,318 words)

Summary: A SHIELD agent named Roger Stevens told Tony that his nickname was "Cap". Tony didn't connect the dots until it was much, much too late.

More below the cut!

Choices by fundamentalBlue (Marvel, Explicit, 1,749 words)

Summary: “We both know why you come here. So don’t go acting surprised or disgusted. You’re the one who wants this. You.”

Choke You With My Charms by synteis (Ults, Explicit, 8,919 words)

Summary: Steve can't seem to help himself from jerking off at Tony's big do. Tony can't seem to get it up after the last round of chemo. But when Tony offers to take Steve in hand and give Steve's cock some old-fashioned punishment, neither of them are quite expecting what happens next.

I won’t leave you falling by @blossomsinthemist (616, Explicit, 14,653 words)

Summary: Tony doms for Steve, which involves some specially enhanced red rope, cock rings, two vibrators, and a lot of orgasm control. It works out. Bottom Steve, trembling and desperate to come, loving dom Tony, plenty of aftercare.

Larger Than Life by @festiveferret (MCU, Explicit, 3,697 words)

Summary: Steve wants that in him. Right now.

Small Weird Love by @haemodye (Marvel, Explicit, 13,140 words)

Summary: When a magical mishap results in Tony swapping his legs for tentacles, he's absolutely mortified. How is he supposed to face Steve? Steve can't possibly want him like this. Right? Right...

So Much to Confide to You by @sineala (616, Explicit, 16,988 words)

Summary: After an attack by the Masters of Evil, Avengers Mansion is in ruins. Tony has come back from California to help the East Coast team pick up the pieces -- literally. And when the team finds items of a certain intimate nature in the wreckage of the mansion's bedrooms, Tony is of course the one who steps forward to claim them. This leads to two problems: Problem Number One: They're not his sex toys. His toys are in California. Therefore, one of Tony's longtime friends is also extremely kinky and he has no idea who. Problem Number Two: One of Tony's longtime friends happens to own an Iron Man butt plug. Oh, God.

The Crying Game by @fohatic (MCU, Explicit, 36,403 words)

Summary: Steve Rogers stared at the dimly glowing digital screen of the little burner phone, rereading the text message as if it might somehow give away something he missed the first dozen times he scrutinized it. His frown only deepened, though, brows drawing together with consternation as the 88 characters only left him with an even more ponderous sense of uncertainty. If you meant what you wrote, I'll be at the Swissotel Sarajevo, 4/18. Presidential Suite. 9pm. Come alone. ... Nearly a year after Steve and Tony's fallout—and only weeks after press rumors that Tony and Pepper's engagement was inexplicably called off—Steve gets a message on the dedicated burner phone. Despite his instinctive reservations, he's compelled to answer the mysterious call. An approximately canon-compliant story.

The Prize by @sabrecmc (MCU, Explicit, 318,625 words)

Summary: Steve ends up as a concubine in the royal harem.

[rxmqnova]

Hey there, i love your writting 🤍

Maybe you could write something with Lizzie x Fem Reader

In a world when everyone knew about Lizzie being bi, she went to a concert thanks to Scarlett and the marvel girls, they went to see Yn and her group, later Lizzie and Yn met and It was really good and they become friends, they like each other, they have a thing, they kissed, even sex but they were not together.

Yn with her life, some girls usually said they have a one night stand with her, and Lizzie didn't like that, because she was falling in love with Yn.

So one day, Lizzie decided to do something, meeting a friend and the paps took photos of them and that got Yn very upset because she thought they were together or Lizzie got tired of Yn, so she wanted to write a song, about her (you can choose one if you want) and Yn told Scarlett about it, and told her to bring Lizzie and the others to her next concert. So before she started to sing the new song, she said like she wrote it because she wanted to tell the world she was in love with someone and hopes it's not to late for being with her.

Then Lizzie was speechless and when the concert finished and see each other, Lizzie went to her and kiss her

The song

Y/N: 26 years old ——————————————————

NO ONE'S POV "That was actually really good" Lizzie admits, following her friends out of the stadium.

Lizzie, Scarlett, Flo, Hailee and Brie have just been on a concert. Scarlett's younger cousin is a singer and invited Scarlett and her friends to her concert.

"I know, right?! I told you Y/N is a really good singer and her band is awesome. You guys should meet her, I think you'd be good friends" Scarlett smiles, not waiting for any reaction and leading the girls backstage.

Meanwhile Y/N is already in her dressing room, all changed into just jeans and a hoodie, taking off her make-up.

"Come in!" She shouts after hearing a knock on the door.

"Hey there, superstar" Scarlett teases, walking in on which Y/N gasps.

"Scar, you came!" The girl smiles widely, immediately walking over to give her older cousin a hug.

"I had to when you invited me. You were absolutely amazing" Scarlett smiles.

"Thank you" Y/N smiles back, her cheeks turning a bit red.

"Oh. These are my friends who came with me. Brie, Florence, Hailee and Lizzie" Scarlett smiles, introducing everyone to her cousin.

"It's nice to meet you" Y/N smiles at all of Scarlett's friend, her gaze staying the longest at Lizzie who blushes when she notices. "Hey, we're planning to go to the bar, don't you wanna join us?" Y/N asks with a smile

———

A few weeks flew after that night, that night when Y/N made new friends. Her and Lizzie have even been out for lunch and dinner a few times.

Y/N takes a deep breath before opening the door, her date only just arrived. She opens the door and can't help herself, but to stare at the gorgeous woman in front of her.

"Everything okay? Is the dress too much?" Lizzie asks nervously.

"No, no. You just look so beautiful" Y/N smiles, standing aside to let her date in. "Come in"

"Thank you, you also cleaned up nicely" Lizzie smiles back, walking in.

"Thank you" Y/N smiles, her cheeks turning red.

This is one of the few times that Y/N actually felt something towards someone. Usually she does just one night stands and never takes it seriously, but with Lizzie it's different and she knows that she wants more than just a one time thing.

The singer tried her best to cook the best dinner, so the date would be perfect. And it's all looking really good so far.

The conversation goes on and on, Lizzie has complimented the food a few times which always makes Y/N blush and Lizzie loves that.

The girls move to the living room after dinner. They continue sharing stories from their childhood and school years, laughing at them together.

That soon stops when they lips meet for a kiss. Both somehow felt like it's the right moment.

"Do you maybe… want to take that upstairs?" Y/N asks, smirk on her face when Lizzie agrees.

———

No call, no text, nothing. Lizzie's completely confused right now. Y/N promised she'd call her, but week has passed and nothing. Of course, Lizzie tried calling her many times, but Y/N just never picks up which makes Lizzie angry and sad at the same time as she's having feelings for the singer.

On the other side, Y/N is totally freaking out. She has no idea what to do. Relationships aren't her thing and she doesn't want to mess things up like she did in her previous relationships, she's really falling for Lizzie.

It is known between celebrities that Y/N's usually having just one nights stands and Lizzie only just found out which hurts her even more. She really thought they had connection.

"Are you sure she takes you just like a one night stand?" Aubrey asks which makes Lizzie sigh.

"She's not picking up her phone or answering messages, Aubrey. I was definitely just a one time thing for her" Lizzie explains, another sigh leaving her lips when she spots a group of paparazzi taking pictures of them.

"Why haven't you just gone to her house?" Aubrey asks, trying to help her friend.

"I don't need her to make me feel even more humiliated than I feel right now… I just… I just feel used by her and I really thought we could work" Lizzie sighs again.

While Lizzie's talking to her friend, Y/N is nervously walking around the house and waiting for her cousin to arrive and help her with this situation.

"Thank god you're here. I'm panicking and need your help" Y/N sighs, leading Scarlett into the living room.

"I'm sure it won't be that bad. What's up?" Scarlett asks with a chuckle, sitting down on the couch.

"… Scar, I think I fell in love" Y/N admits, dramatically sitting down next to Scarlett.

"What's wrong with that? It's completely normal" Scarlett says, rubbing her younger cousin's back and trying to comfort her.

"I just don't know what to do. We had a date and we… you know, we slept together. But usually I don't feel anything but now I do and I don't know how to tell her" Y/N sighs, burying her face into her hands.

"Just tell her you like her. It's not that complicated, honey. Just be yourself and tell her what you feel" Scarlett smiles, trying to encourage her cousin.

In that moment Y/N's phone beeps. The girl immediately takes a look, seeing an article about 'Elizabeth Olsen 'hanging out' with Aubrey Plaza'.

"I guess that doesn't matter now" Y/N sighs, her eyes filling with tears when she gives her phone to Scarlett.

"Wait. Lizzie is that one you like?" Scarlett asks shocked as none of them have mentioned anything. "Lizzie and Aubrey have always been close friends, I'm sure they're not dating"

"You can't know that. And the article says the opposite. Just read the first two sentences… I messed it up. I waited for too long"

"Y/N, if you really like her, just go and tell her, you'll-"

"No, I got an idea" A small smile forms on Y/N's face. "Can you please bring her to my next concert on Friday?"

"Sure, but what do you want to do?" Scarlett asks confused.

"I'm gonna write a song for her" Y/N smiles proudly.

"… Okay? I mean, I've never heard you sing a love song. Are you sure that's a good idea?" Scarlett asks unsure.

"Yes. I need something big… something romantic. I'll start working on it right now. Promise you'll bring her" The singer looks at Scarlett seriously.

"Okay, yeah. I'll bring her" Scarlett promises.

"Yay! Thank you!" Y/N grins, giving her cousin a hug before rushing away to find some papers and a pen.

———

"Scar, I really don't want to be here" Lizzie groans when Y/N sings her first song.

"Just wait a bit longer, you need to hear something" Scarlett sighs. Scarlett managed to drag Lizzie to the concert which Lizzie isn't happy about at all. Scarlett heard the song Y/N wrote though and she knows that Lizzie needs to hear that.

"Thank you for joining us tonight!" Y/N says to the audience that cheer in response and makes Y/N smile. "For the start I'd like to sing you a song that you've never heard before… I wrote it for one girl that I really like, but… but I panicked and messed everything up… But that doesn't change the fact that I want the world to know that I'm in love with her… Hopefully it's not too late to prove it"

When Y/N says the last word, the band starts playing and she starts singing the song she wrote for Lizzie who listens to every single word. Lizzie's eyes fill with tears while she's listening to the beautiful lyrics, she knows the girl Y/N is singing about is her and she knows she's in love with Y/N.

"So?… What do you think?" Scarlett teases, nudging her shoulder with Lizzie's playfully.

"I… I-I'm speechless" Lizzie admits, wiping her tears away. "I'm in love with your cousin" She smiles, looking back at Y/N who's about to sing another song.

"You're gonna need a lot of luck" Scarlett jokes. "I'm kidding. No. I'm not gonna lie, it'll be hard with her sometimes, but she really likes you. She'd never write a love song and then sing it in front of all of these people. You must be really special" Scarlett smiles, happy that her little cousin and her friend found love.

———

The concert just ended and Lizzie is making her way backstage with Scarlett following behind. She doesn't even knock and just opens the door of Y/N's dressing room which makes Y/N jump a little bit.

"Oh my god, you scared the-" Y/N starts, her sentence getting cut off by Lizzie's lips being pressed to hers.

"I'm in love with you too" Lizzie smiles after they pull away, Y/N's cheeks bright red as she wasn't expecting this at all. Y/N smiles and pulls Lizzie back in, kissing her passionately.

----------------------

This request could actually make the whole book. It's a really great idea! <;33

Part 2

Series masterlist

Masterlist

[orshii]

bitter and sweet

Author: orshii

Pairing: Kim Hongjoong x female reader

Warnings: Use of word "fuck", smoking, alcohol consumption

Word count: 2k

Summary: When you finally quit your job, you need a distraction. Hongjoong happens to be that.

A/N: Am- hi? This is totally new to me, and I would've never uploaded this story, if it weren't for my bestie @bvidzsoo (ly). She kept saying, how good this story was, so Ig I'm here? I really hope you will enjoy it, as much as I did when I wrote this little drabble. Recently I am very whipped for Hongjoong, so yeah...I just had to write this. Anyways, have fun. xoxo orshii

After a whole month of living like a robot: starting work early in the morning, when the sun wasn't even up yet, until when it hid behind again the buildings of our little town; I slowly started to feel like I was losing my mind. The feeling was similar to when your days are just as monotone as the clock on your wall, never changing its course the opposite way. You become one with your regular human life, which is always clouded, always grey just like the clouds above you; there are no colors.

It started becoming overwhelming, I started getting tired of this feeling of emptiness; I felt the void spread through my body every single fucking day. That's when I decided to quit my job, which wasn't even my dream job. I have been working at a fucking bakery as a cashier, of course it wasn't my dream job, whose would it be…

It was a Friday when I quit, so, as I was an unemployed nobody, the best idea was to celebrate that, wasn’t it? My friends were excited to hear my sudden proposal of going to a party, which was held by the town’s biggest brat, Jung Wooyoung; but I didn't care, I needed to get laid as soon as possible. I just wanted an escape from this shit reality, and not to think about what was going to happen in the future now that I was without a job.

 We decided to dress up pretty and sexy for the night with the girls. I was wearing black ripped jeans with fishnets underneath, and a black crop top with some cuts on it here and there, accompanied with my black boots and some accessories.

As we arrived in front of the house of said brat, Wooyoung, we went inside deep into the crowd of swaying bodies, which were flowing with the music. The music was so loud that we couldn't even hear our own voice, the beat punching our chests harshly. The first thing we had to do was to drink, of course, so we headed to the kitchen. We could barely see the furniture inside the kitchen due to the smog filling the air, coming from the people smoking this and that. Finally, somehow we found our love, the meaning of our night:  alcohol. We started to take some tequilas shots, and anything else we found, honestly. We just wanted to get drunk. Me, at least.

Eventually, I somehow found myself around the swaying bodies in the living room, but my friends were nowhere to be found.

I started to dance following the flow of the music; I felt like I could finally breathe, my latest months were hard and I just needed to forget all of the shit that’s happened.

At some point, I felt like somebody was watching me, I don't know how, I’d call it perhaps intuition.

When my eyes finally found the owner of two staring lustful eyes, my breath hitched. I have never seen this man in my entire life before, but as I watched him, my heart just started to race like it never has. My heart didn't even race like this when a fucking bear started to chase me, and that’s no fun.

I felt dizzy, maybe because of the influence of the alcohol or I didn’t know, but the sudden emotions started hitting me like I was a fucking punch bag.

The man was sitting on the couch, he was a bit far, but I could see his devilish smile from where I stood. It’s not supposed to be a joke; but with the red lights of the party, he looked like the fucking devil himself. His raven-black hair fell on his forehead, reaching his eyes, making his glare even more intense as he held a can of beer, leaning over his knees.

I haven't moved since my eyes landed on him but somebody, suddenly, bumped into me, and if I remember the guy's name correctly, it’s San. But I was glad, because I somehow found myself back to reality again, as if the last few minutes were in slow-motion.

I tried not to look at the stranger again, since my friends finally found me and we started to dance together, laughing and goofing around. I would be lying if I said my eyes never searched for the stranger again as he had moved from the couch. I felt a bit disappointed that I might never see him again.

And there was a chance that I actually might see him, and after a while, I suddenly felt two warm hands around my waist. I don't know how, don't ask, but I just knew it was the stunning stranger guy from the couch, with whom I had a staring contest like half an hour ago.

We just weirdly danced to the music, feeling the rhythm as it led our bodies in synchrony. It was weird because he was a total stranger but, somehow, I felt safe in his warm arms. I slowly turned around to finally look at the owner of the warm hands, and I was fucking right. I felt like I was going to melt right then and there like ice cubes on a hot summer day.

Why? Because he was the hottest guy I have ever seen in my life, and I'm not joking, I would never joke about things like that. He looked ethereal, and I don't know what led him to me, but I thank God for it, because it was worth every moment. I looked into his eyes as he was glaring at me sharply. I couldn't read his expression, but I saw a small smirk slip onto his slim lips, so, I reached my arms around his neck. Yes, I felt comfortable like this, after all, he was still holding my waist.

“Hi.” I spoke suddenly. Don't even ask me why I had the courage to even say something to him. That night, my soul has left my body surely.

“Hey.” He said with a low tone, leaning close to my ear so I could hear him. I felt shivers running through my body.

“Wanna smoke?” I asked him with questioning eyes.

He smiled, “Yeah, of course.”

And then, he grabbed my hands and pulled me towards the backyard.

I looked back at my friends, but they were just laughing and shouted, “Go get him!”

It made me laugh as I followed the stranger.

As we finally arrived outside, I felt relieved. The weather was nice, I finally could hear my own voice and I got to inhale some fresh air.

We stopped at the terrace of the house, and I leaned my back against one of the pillars as the stranger across from me did the same thing.

We were quiet for a bit as I enjoyed the fresh air, and I felt him watching me. It wasn't an awkward quiet, it was a comfortable one. I stared back at him, taking in the sight of him as his outfit screamed elegance, but at the same time it was casual; he was wearing all black.

“Aren't you going to smoke?” He asked suddenly, breaking the quiet.

“Nah, I don't smoke.” I said with a serious face.

The stranger looked at me, his eyebrows scrunching together in confusion.

“Then why did you want to come out to—smoke?”

I just shrugged, “I just needed some fresh air, but to not disappoint you—” I started to search for something in my pocket, “I have this.”

I showed him the colorful elf bar, raising it up to his face.

He started to laugh loudly; it was low toned and the sound tingled through my whole body. I loved his laugh.

“Okay.” He nodded, “Then I’m going to smoke a real cigarette.”

He spoke while still smiling as he reached for his cigarettes in his pocket. Damn, he was actually smoking smoking; that’s a red flag, but I like it.

He slowly pulled out a cigarette from the package, and took it in between his parted thin lips, his gaze never leaving mine, only when he lit it up.

I decided to smoke the elf bar which was in my hands. It tasted like a tangle of freshly picked raspberries and blueberries from the wild fields, accompanied with the taste of dark red cherries. I loved the sweet taste as it slowly went down into my lungs, spreading the sweetness everywhere, and then, I exhaled it slowly out into the clear air.

The guy in front of me was staring at my lips as the sweet fog came out from my parted lips.

“Is it good?” He asked, gazing at me.

“It is. It’s sweet, unlike yours.” I said pointing at the cigarette in his hands.

He looked down at it.

“It's not that bad—wanna taste it?” He asked me frowning with a smirk on his lips.

And the look he was giving me sent me to Hell, just for me to return as Lucifer. That's why I was suddenly so bold, out of my mind.

“Do you want to taste this?” I pointed at my elf bar, avoiding his question on purpose.

“Yeah, why not?” He said, stepping closer to me.

I stared at him as an idea came to my mind.

“Wanna double shotgun?” I asked pointing at my elf bar and his cigarette, watching him with inviting eyes.

Just the idea of it was already so exciting, now imagine actually doing it…with a stranger, whom, despite having just met, it felt like I have known him my whole life.

“Hell, yes.” He said in a low tone, it was almost like a thunder. He stepped closer to me, our bodies almost touching, but it seemed like he didn't want to overstep some unsaid boundaries.

And so, I slowly inhaled from the elf bar, inhaling it deep down into my lungs as he did the same with his cigarette, burning the end of it with his inhale.

As we both were ready, we leaned into each other’s bodies, our lips almost touching. We exhaled the smoke at the same time as it tumbled through our parted lips, just to meet with the other's soft lips, inhaling the other's taste. I breathed him in, held it in my lungs, wanting to keep it there forever.

“It's so bitter.” I whispered still leaning close, slowly exhaling the smoke of his cigarette.

“It's so sweet.” He whispered back to me, leaning even closer in, gazing at me with dark eyes, which were telling me so much yet nothing at the same time.

“Wanna taste it on your sweet lips.” He said, reaching out his thumb to brush it against my lower lip.

“Then what are you waiting for?” I whispered against his bitter lips, closing my eyes slowly.

He slowly grabbed my chin and tilted it upwards, and then leaned in to brush his lips against mine. I could taste the bitterness of his cigarette on his lips, blending with the sweet taste of my own lips, which the elf bar has left behind.

Sweet and bitter collided, it was like our own two worlds colliding: he tasted bitter, but somehow, he brought some sweetness into my grey world, painting it slowly full with colors as he brushed his lips against mine.

“You haven’t told me your name.” I said after our lips separated from each other, desiring for more. I wanted to taste him forever.

“Hongjoong.” He whispered, our lips almost touching, “And what's your name, pretty?”

“Y/N” I said, and he smiled at me sweetly as our lips collided again, never wanting to separate.

He filled me up with passion. He made me want to finally step out of my monotone life. I felt like I was alive again. He made my grey life colorful again.

Later on, we were passed out in the back of his car…how’d we let it get this far, I don’t know.

[backgroundagent3]

For the character asks, Lance Hunter

Thanks for the ask! 💙

First impression: Loved him. I think I found him a little bit annoying, but in a good way, of course.

Impression now: I somehow love him even more. I still can't believe the writers just wrote him and Bobbi out because they were such great characters. He deserved to stay even just for comedic relief, because God knows the team needed a laugh sometimes, and so did we.

Favorite moment: When he shows up in prison to "talk to his client" in season 5. That was so iconic because not only was it a great entrance, but also such a relief to see a familiar face in that situation, especially if said familiar face has a hilarious dynamic with Fitz. That was obviously written for the fans, so I have no complaints. Honourable mentions to when he punches the guy from the ATCU without so much as a second thought, when he rants about Bobbi in 2.04 pretending he's not in love with her, and when he goes undercover as an obnoxious IT guy.

Idea for a story: This is not my idea, but I need to know what happened when he and Bobbi almost got married again between seasons 3 and 5. What do you mean "the ninjas showed up"? This had so much potential, but I think the fact that he never explained makes it funnier. Is it a weird metaphor for something? Did some ninjas actually attack them right before the wedding? Are the ninjas some friends who didn't think they should get married? We'll never know.

Unpopular opinion: I've seen somewhere that Most Wanted was a bad idea from the start, and I'm here to tell you that's wrong. I think it's a tragedy that it got cancelled, because can you imagine the potential? A spinoff of the best show on Earth? Our favourite problematic spy couple on the run breaking the law and causing problems? How is that a bad idea. Even if the script was bad and the plot was bad and everything was bad, it's still extra screentime for two awesome characters. If nothing else, we all know he would have had hilarious one liners, and I would have loved to watch it.

Favorite relationship: Huntingbird. Yes, I know he and Bobbi had a LOT of issues, but that just makes it funnier. Their bickering was on point, and the way he so was so obviously down bad for her the minute the words "demonic hell beast" left his mouth is so pathetic and hilarious. On a more serious note, the way they worked together as agents was great. While they may not have always trusted each other, they always had faith in the other's capabilities to do a good job in the field and stay alive ("Don't die our there"). They worried, sure, but they didn't try to keep the other out of danger Fitzsimmons style because they knew they could handle things, and for the most dysfunctional relationship of the show, that was pretty healthy. As for platonic relationship, Fitz. All they had in common was the fact that they were sassy Brits with serious relationship issues, and that was somehow enough to form a great dynamic. I loved all their little moments in 2.04, especially when Fitz talked about his crush on Jemma in the weirdest, most uncomfortable, and out of context way, and Hunter just went along with it and comforted him.

Favorite headcanon: At some point watching season 6 I decided it was stupid that they hadn't returned to SHIELD, so in my head they did. It just didn't make sense that they still had to live a life on the run when SHIELD was a legitimate organisation again, especially when the new director was their best friend who could have pulled some strings to have them there. It would have been so cool to see them again, not to mention it would have been very helpful for the team. And can you imagine Hunter's reaction at seeing Sarge? If anyone could have added some levity to the situation, I know it's him.

Writing this made me remember how much I love and miss him. Please send me more!

Character Asks.

[steddieprompts]

Ok so this is more of a full fledged story than a prompt but work with me here (sorry for typos, i wrote this quick):

Medieval Steddie and possible ronance au: Eddie is a bard who has been banished from the castle. He functions now as a guide to adventurers, having completed a fair few adventures himself. He'll take any wannabe knight or reward seeking peasant anywhere in the kingdom and beyond for a price.

Steve, or Stephon really, is the Prince of the same castle Eddie was banished from. His friend, Robin of House Buckley, a rebellious young linguist, has disappeared in Goblin country. Steve has to save her, not only because Robin is his closest friend, but because his father has vowed to banish Steve if he doesn't do something with his life.

Steve finds Eddie and is somewhat disguised in light armor with no crests from the castle or opulent furnishings. Eddie, in truth, doesn't recognize Steve at first, just clocks him as someone of status. Eddie isn't a huge fan of high status knights taking up for-reward jobs (and there is a reward for Robin, she comes from a respected science house and her parents are worried). Why not leave these jobs to people who need the dough? But he takes Steve on as a client because even if Steve doesn't need the money, Eddie sure does.

...........

They start their adventure off in terse interactions. Eddie doesn't like this pompous rich guy and Steve doesn't like how Eddie keeps giving him the side eye. Steve finally asks him one night what his problem is. Eddie makes some remark about how people who obviously already have a patron (is that what you call people who hire knights?) shouldn't be taking on stand alone quests. They already get enough benefits from being an employed knight. Steve scoffs as soon as he hears it.

"I'm trained, but I'm not a knight. And I didn't take this quest on fir the money. Robs is my friend. I told her not to go out there alone."

Eddie eases up after that, still a little suspicious about Steve's background, but if he isn't lying about being friends with Robin, then maybe Steve is ok. Eddie had done some side work for the Buckley house before and they were fine people in his book.

They keep going, this time on more amicable terms, even branching towards friendly, but Eddie can't seem to shake the feeling that he knows Steve.

They are a day at most from Goblin country when Eddie finally places it. Steve is prince Stephon. They argue and it blows up. Why would Steve hide his identity? Why wouldn't he at least tell Eddie? Is he doing this for Robin or just to secure a place on the throne?

Eddie revokes the quest, says Steve is on his own, and storms off... but he realizes Robin is still in danger so he backtracks. The thing is, Eddie was mad about Steve's secret identity, but he was more mad at himself that he had grown attached to Steve... maybe had feelings for him.

He doesn't catch up to Steve until they find Robin, who has somehow convinced the Duchess Nancy from the Wheeler fiefdom to help her in her quest, doing battle with a fuck-huge troll (Nancy is in armor BTW, she is very fetching). Steve busts in in the nick of time but three people still aren't enough to take it down. Enter Eddie, running and yelling like he does in the show to turn the tide of the battle and they defeat the troll.

Robin and Nancy explain there is something much more sinister than goblin unrest happening and that they have discovered a necromancer by the name of Vecna who is stirring up trouble.

They continue the quest to find and defeat vecna and along the way Eddie and Steve have a heart to heart and are friendly again; flirting even.

When they finally find vecna and do battle, they win, but Eddie is grievously injured. Steve rushes him to a hermits house that he knows of on the edge of goblin country where the two hermits Sir Jon and Sir Argyle nurse Eddie back to health with their strange herbs and medicine. Steve doesn't leave his side. When Eddie wakes he divulged his undying love for the prince and he and Steve become hermits themselves, watching the goblin boarder for any sign of Vecna.

Nancy and Robin take Steve's place and rule over a happy, healthy, well educated kingdom.

the end.

[shhh-secret-time]

I love love love your stuff! Can we get a jealousy smut fic?! I don't care with who I just want something tasty!

I was feeling super bad about my writing today, I really struggled with this one but when I went back and read what you wrote it made me feel a lot better. Thank you anon I really appreciate it. And thank you to everyone who voted on the poll! Warning: NSFW, Oral, Strong Language, Drinking Pairing: Kyle x M!Reader Note: I've never written for male reader before, but I want everyone who reads my things to feel included somehow. I didn't include anything crazy in this story because of it. So this one is more on the tamer side of things.

His head hurt. The ache started from the middle of his forehead and spread like a blanket over his skull. Naturally the cure would be going to a party late at night that his best friend drug him too. With medicine being some jungle juice in a red solo cup that said best friend shoved into his hand.

"Loosen up Kyle you look like you're about to explode." He almost didn't hear Stan over the sound of the music playing over them.

Each song had a heavy bass, like a heartbeat slamming into the side of his head and his chest. The kind of music that you could feel in your ribcage each time the beat dropped. So yeah, he really was about to explode. Whatever was in his cup wasn't helping either, the sugary drink was making his heart spike and his stomach churn.

"Stan, I didn't even want to fucking be here in the first place. I'm here for you." Kyle grumbles back once the song finishes, they have a few moments of silence before it picks back up.

"No, you're not. You and I both know if you really wanted to you would have left by now." Stan teases, shooting him a lazy smirk.

Kyle can feel his face burn, like the drink in his hand, it's a mixture of emotions. Rage and embarrassment swirled together with his headache creating the perfect concoction in the red head’s body. His grip on his cup tightens as his arms flex under the forest green flannel and faded Crimson Dawn shirt.

Every bit of him hated the fact that Stan was right, and even more that he knew the reason why Kyle was enduring this. This shit night, this shit drink, this shit music, this shit headache. Why he endured this shit party and all other parties he's been attending the last week.

You.

Dark green orbs travel over to the dance floor where you've been for the past few hours. He can't stop himself from watching the way your hips sway back and for, the way your jeans squeeze your sides in the most delicious way. Even in the dim light he can see how flushed your face looks from all the dancing you've been doing; his eyes lock on to the beads of sweat the travel down your neck and how it slides down your Adam's apple.

Kyle takes a drink of his alcohol, but it does nothing about how dry his mouth feel. His lips now glistening under lights coming off the cell phones that surround him. He barely registers the taste of the coke or the way the drink burns the back of his throat. Not when he can almost taste the drink that's on your lips.

Fuck he was thirsty.

"Earth to Kyle. Dude you're staring." Stan's fingers snapped him out of his trance.

Kyle looked over at Stan with his mouth open slightly. He raises a brow and scoffs, trying to clear his mind.

"You can go dance with him you know? You don't have to stand in this corner! Might have a little competition though." Stan says, gesturing over to you. "Looks like Bebe's all over him."

He was right, but that was nothing new. Bebe practically clinging to your arm, her body all but grinding against yours. Not that this was anything new, she was always around you. Whether it was walking to classes together or sitting at lunch with one another, she was always there. Anytime Kyle even thought about going up to you to talk to you, she was always fucking there. His fingers dipped into the plastic cup making it crack, the amber liquid spilling out onto his fingers.

"Fuck! Look I don't want to dance. I'm just gonna get another drink." Kyle grumbles pushing past his friend.

Jealousy was an ugly beast; one Kyle knew all too well. Insecurity was something he struggled with, ever since he was a kid and it only got worse when he got older. Getting smacked with a growth spurt that made him shoot up past his friends, while it was great for basketball, it drew too much attention as if his stupid curly red hair didn't do that already. He was wishing he brought his hat, why he ever let Stan talk him into things like this he never knew.

The path to the table with all the alcohol was mostly clear. A few people laying off to the side talking to one another or passed out. The smell of weed and alcohol in the air made Kyle scrunch up his nose as he threw the broken cup away. It wasn't hard to find a new one, they were scattered everywhere, now finding one that was abandoned with a drink already in it was a different story. As he scanned the table for a new cup another walking headache approached the table with him.

Eric Cartman, the bane of his existence and the biggest source of his insecurities. Although at this very moment, Bebe was giving him a run for his money. That didn't mean he wanted him to talk however, but like always his mouth worked faster than Kyle's legs.

"I don't know how to tell you this Kyle...but you look like a total shit bag right now. You...you are aware this is a party. You know that thing people go to when they want to have fun." Eric's voice was what sandpaper grinding against skin would sound like, Kyle was sure.

"Fuck off asshole, I really don't want to deal with you right now." Kyle sighs as he picks up a cup.

"Awh, and here I was about to throw you a lifeline. A little birdie told me you've been eye fucking Bebe's boy toy all day." Eric leans against the table pretending to inspect his nails, and his tone alone makes Kyle want to cave his face in.

Kyle grits his teeth trying to focus on the pour of whatever clear liquid he grabbed. "And would that birdie like me to smash his fucking teeth in?"

"You've been using that threat since we were kids. Come on Kyle don't pretend like you aren't at least a little curious as to what I've got to say. We both know how this will go. You're angry because you have sand in your vagina, and I'll tell you what I want because I don't respect you."

Kyle slams the bottle down with a loud thud and glares at him, his grip on the neck of the bottle is so tight he's white knuckling it. Eric holds his hands up in defense, a small bead of sweat trails down the side of his face.

"Believe it or not, I want to help! I've got a lot riding on this little bet with Craig, and I can't have you fucking me out of a hundred and fifty dollars."

"What makes you think I want your help, Cartman?!"

"You don't, but once again. One hundred. And. Fifty. Dollars." Eric holds up his index fingers as he slows his speaking down. "And you need the help, as funny as this is watching you suffer, I'm your friend and as your friend...you would want me to have a hundred and fifty dollars."

No, he really wouldn't. He would want Cartman to get hit by a bus, or at the very least to leave him alone. Kyle could feel himself boiling over at this point his hands were shaking, and his body felt like it was on fire. He was at his tipping point.

"Look I can get you an hour or so with him alone, all you have to do is grow a pair and talk to him. You can't talk to him because Bebe's always around him, right? Well, how do you think Wendy felt with you and Stan? And who brought them together?"

"Aliens."

"Aliens aren't real Kyle, quit making shit up. It was me." He's never seen Eric look or sound so offended before. "You can stand in your gay little corner drinking by yourself, or you can go talk to him and be gay with him in another corner."

As Kyle went to open his mouth to yell at him nothing came out, once again he couldn't find anything to say to him. Nothing that wouldn't be a string of swears or him finally connecting his fist to his smug face. Instead, he closed his eyes for a moment and sighed. At the very least he could blame the alcohol for this horrible idea.

Eric took the silence as a yes, with a wicked grin he put his hand on the taller man's shoulder. "Leave it to me Kyle. You'll know the signal when you see it."

He should stop him. He should stop Eric from doing whatever dumb shit he was going to do. But he doesn't, his heart is pounding so hard in his chest that the music seems like a lullaby.

Kyle watches as Eric walks right up to you and Bebe, he walks with such confidence. The confidence of someone who was not invited to this party but showed up anyway, because that's exactly the kind of person he was. The music makes it where he can't hear what he says to you but the look on your face goes from a relaxed smile to a horrified look.

That's when your eyes lock with his. Kyle nearly leaps from his skin as he watches you look between him and Eric. Eric has his hand on his hips and his fingers snapping up at your face.

"No... he isn't."

Eric shouts something, and Bebe steps in between the both of them. She puts her fingers in his face and glares up at him shouting something back. Eric bobs his head to the side swiveling it around like bobble head almost.

"He is. Oh, my fucking god." Kyle puts his face in his hands.

He's past the point of anger. He's beyond seeing red, it's just white. White noise and a ringing in his ear. The steady thumping of his heartbeat and the music is the only thing grounding him. To keep him from flying off the handle and probably making the situation worse.

His fingers tug at the flesh of his skin, pulling it down as he moves from his hands. Fuck it. He's had enough. Had enough of sitting on the sidelines and watching everyone else get to have your attention. The drink was left forgotten on the table behind him, he had gotten what he needed from it.

"A little liquid courage goes a long way." Stan used to say, and maybe he was right.

Kyle's across the room before he knows it, all that basketball playing finally paid off. He's able to dodge sweaty bodies still moving around on the dance floor. A man with a clear destination and nothing was going to stop him.

You don't have time to register the fact Kyle has you by the wrist or the fact that he's dragging you away from the dance floor. He tries to keep his grip gentle, he really does, but through this anger everything in his body has gone numb. You're not complaining about any pain, but he thinks he hears you say something about walking too fast.

Kyle drags you upstairs so he can talk to you without screaming matches or loud music. Without prying eyes or nosey party goers. But now that he's got you here, he doesn't know what to say. Doesn't know how to approach this without blowing up. It's not your fault, you don't deserve this.

"What did Cartman say to you?" So, he settles with that, a question. At the very least he can direct all this anger towards Cartman.

You look down between the two of you, looking at the way he still has his larger hand wrapped around your wrist. It's funny, this whole situation. At first you were a little freaked out when Eric just came up and suddenly started yelling at you, but when you saw the look in Kyle's eyes it clicked.

The suspicion that Kyle Broflovski had a crush on you was always there. His gaze lingering a little longer than normal, the way he'd blush and turn his head away from you like he wasn't just admiring you from across the room. When he'd come to you asking for help in class you knew he was passing. All those times he nags at you for not wearing gloves in the Colorado cold, saying something about how you'll get sick and then he'll be forced to take care of you.

Yeah, he wasn't slick. And the poor man wore his heart on his sleeve. If he wasn't trying to sneak peeks at you, then he was shooting glares at Bebe. Oh, how little he knew. Now it all made sense why he shot those dirty looks. Why he was starting to avoid you when earlier in the year he seemed so eager to have lunch with you.

"If he said something that hurt your feelings, I swear I'll turn his spinal fluid into an option at the God damn McDonald's soda fountain." Kyle snarls through gritted teeth.

Oh?

You almost want to chuckle at his reaction, curling your index finger and pressing your lips to the side to stop it from slipping out. "Sorry I was just taken back by all of this. It's not like you to up and grab someone like this Kyle."

He blinks once, and then twice before realizing he's still got a firm grip on you. His face turns red, and he drops your hand like it's hot coal burning his palm.

"Sorry! I just needed to get you away from him, before he said something stupid!" His apology is so cute. The way he won't even look you in the eye. "He didn't say anything stupid, did he?"

"Oh, not much." You shrug and smirk when he lets out a little sigh of relief. "Just that I'm a homewrecker for trying to come in between you two."

"What?!"

"Yeah, something about how I'm stepping up on his man and then he started snapping. Which by the way, great choice in a partner. I didn't know you guys were a thing~." You knew damn well they weren't, not from the way Kyle looked like he was about to explode. Perhaps you were adding fuel to this already raging fire, but if you were honest with yourself. You liked this side of Kyle. The way his eyes darkened and the way his body tensed.

"That fat fucking bastard. I'm gonna kill him!" Just as Kyle was about to leave you in whatever room he dragged you into, you stepped between him and the door putting your arms out.

"Hold on! Just let Bebe handle it, she's got it under control. This is her party."

"She doesn't get to handle him! I'm going to take care of him! It's about time someone put him in his fucking place!"

"Kyle. It's Bebe's party. She can just kick him out and we can go back to having a good time." You place your hand on his chest, trying to guide him back to where he was standing.

He wants to, he really does. The feeling of your hand on his chest almost brings him out of his anger. But your words keep echoing in his head. Eric's stupid plan almost cost him everything, again. "You don't understand! He does this all the time! I'm tired of him getting in the way! She doesn’t get to take this from me to!"

No, he didn't mean that last part, it's not Bebe's fault. He knows that. It's not her fault he can't think straight around you. It's not her fault for wanting to be around you, he can't blame her for that. She probably just sees everything he sees. How wonderful you are, how you light up every room you walk in. How, even now, you're trying to keep the peace and save Cartman's life. Anyone else would have just let that man to die, but here you were Eric Cartman's guardian angel and he didn't even know.

"Bebe? She didn't do anything! What could she have taken!?"

"She's always around you!"

"You mean like you and Stan?"

"No! I mean- it's different! I'm not dating Stan!"

"I'm not dating Bebe!"

He blinks again and it's like he's been hit with cold water. The adrenaline in his veins dulls down to a small buzz. The headache in his head reminds him that it's still here and stronger than ever because of the yelling.

"What?" He asks in a softer tone.

"I'm not dating Bebe!" You yell back as you move your hands off his chest. You cross your arms over yours and give him the most bored look he's ever seen on a person. One that would give Tucker a run for his money.

"Then...why is she..."

"She's gay Kyle. You think you're the only one who gets roped into their friends’ stupid schemes?" You roll your eyes and smirk at him. "She's been trying to make this one chick in our science class jealous."

"Oh."

Fucking oh. That's all he can say. It takes everything in his power not to jump out of the window behind him and just leave town. He could change his name and skip a few states. Grow a beard and shave his head, you'd never see him again and he'd never have to answer for this moment. But his legs feel to heavy to move.

"Yep~! But...it's nice to know you and Eric aren't a thing." Your voice breaks him right out of his little pity party. "You can do so much better."

It takes him a second to realize that you've closed the gap. It's when he feels your fingertips trailing up his forearm, brushing against the veins popping out, that you're touching him. When you look up at him with heavy lidded eyes, he gulps. Trying to swallow that weird lump in his throat.

"If you're so worried that someone else will snatch me up, why not confess to me right now? Unless...I'm reading this whole situation wrong." You move your hands back just as they reach his shoulder blade, and his hand twitches by his side. "Then I can just go back downstairs and ask McCormick for a dance~"

Your back hits the wall as Kyle's resolve finally breaks. His lips crashing down on yours with such a force his teeth clack against yours. It's messy, consuming, and heated.

You can taste the jealousy on his lips.

When you kiss him back, his hands have your wrists pinned to the wall next to your head. Lips locked onto yours and moving against yours with such a frenzy. His teeth tug at your bottom lip, begging for entrance. You respond by biting his back, pulling a moan from him.

Kyle's tongue pushes past your teeth and into your mouth. His tongue meets yours feverishly, twining around in a rushed dance. Your hips roll up against his, the same ones he couldn't take his eyes off of a minute ago. A minute ago, he was breaking his cup because of how jealous he was of Bebe, and now he's got his tongue down your throat pulling the sexiest moans out of your mouth. He devours every one of them until you break the kiss.

His brows furrow before he realizes you broke for air. Your chest heaving as you try to take in as much as you can. You’re rushing to get back to his lips and it almost brings a smile to his face. Kyle cups the side of your face letting his fingertips trace your jawline.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have lashed out at Bebe like that. She's your friend and I should've just talked to you."

"Hm-mm~" You nod up at him still trying to recover from the small make out sesh.

"And... you’re right I should just confess that I really want to date you. That I've liked you for a while now. This isn't how I wanted to do it but...I'm not complaining." He whispers against your lips.

"You're so hot when you tell me I'm right." You press a kiss onto the corner of his lips. "Apology accepted handsome. Now do it right."

Kyle chuckles and brushes his nose across yours. The tip of his nose slides down the bridge of yours just as his lips over yours, dangerously close for another kiss. "Hey. You wanna go out with me so I can stop being jealous all the time."

"Hm..." You pretend to think about his question for a moment making him smirk. He tugs you against his body reminding you that you're trapped against him and the wall. It pulls a laugh right out of you, and you run your fingers through his hair. "Yeah handsome, I'd like that. Just like how I'd reaaaaally like it if you kept kissing me."

Kyle laughs and his lips find yours again. "You really think I'm handsome?"

"So handsome. You walked in with that green flannel and tight shirt, I wanted to rip it off you." You're able to get all of that out in-between kissing him, not willing to break the contact for too long.

"Fuck." Kyle's hands fall to your waist and squeezes it in return. "I wanted to take this slow. Do this right but you're making it so hard."

"I know I can feel it. It's poking me."

"That's not what I meant! Shit! I'm sorry I- oh fuck." He hisses when you roll your hips against him.

His cock is stained against his zipper, the tent in his pants is hard to miss. Nothing could have prepared him for the way you rolled yours against him. He could feel your erection sliding up against his thigh, the material of your jeans working against his.

"Want me to take care of that for you?" Kyle's head starts spinning when your hands slip under his shirt and your fingers slide down the front of his pants. Your palm pressed against the v that dips down.

The way your name comes out of his lips in a breathy whisper almost makes you pull his pants down right then and there. How can you expect him to answer you clearly when your lips are pressing the softest kisses down his throat. "I don't want you to feel like y-you have to."

"Kyle. I want this. I want you. Please don't make me beg for it." How can he say no? Not when your fingers are already playing with the button of his pants. Fingernails tapping against it, rubbing circles around the only thing separating your hands from his cock.

Kyle has no composure left; he's starting to feel his cock ache. He nods down at you and goes to pull his pants open. You watch him with a look of hunger in your eyes, watch as he slides his pants down and listen to the way his breath catches in his throat. Your eyes widen at the sight of his cock springing out of his boxers, bobbing when his tip catches on the thin material.

"Hey Ky."

"H-hm?" He's not able to keep the shakiness out of his voice when you wrap your hands around his cock and sink to your knees.

"I want you to fuck my throat." His heart stops momentarily when you talk.

It returns twice as hard when you begin slowly pumping his dick, hammering against his chest each time your fist slides down and grips the base of his member. "Are you sure sweetheart?"

That's new. The way Kyle calls you that makes your heart pick up. He watches as you move to get comfortable on your knees, his eyes burning down at you. The height difference isn't so bad but it's just enough to where he has to bend down a bit to run his fingers through your hair.

"You really want me to beg for it." He does. He likes the thought of you begging for his cock, the thought of your mouth watering just to get a taste of him. So, he answers you with a little grip on your scalp, fingers wrapping around the locks of your hair.

"Oh~! Fuck! Please!" And he's right, the way you beg is so sweet. Kyle groans and tugs your head back causing you to arch up towards him. Forcing your head up towards him.

As your mouth parts to let out a pretty little moan, the head of his cock presses against your lips. The pre-cum the leaks out of the slit coats your lips, and then your tongue when you let it fall out. Kyle's dick twitches against your little kitten licks before he lets it glide into your mouth. He never could have imagined how amazing it feels to have your red swollen lips wrapped around his length.

Kyle reaches out and traces your lips with his fingers, your lustful gaze watching his every movement. A thick strand of saliva coating his fingers before he pushes his cock into your warm inviting throat. He rocks his hips against your mouth slowly at first. Each time he pulls out more saliva gathers at the base of his cock.

You try to take as much of Kyle as you can, the soft sounds of you gagging through the wet thrusts feels messy. It was sloppy and so incredibly hog. Watching the red head lose himself, the restraints he put on himself snapping with each long glide against your tongue. Not long after you hollow your cheeks and continue to suck him off, does he finally break. His hips snap forward thrusting into your mouth faster.

Kyle is so pretty. His lips parted slightly as he struggles to bite back the moans, you're pulling from him. The hand that's no longer tracing your lips is pressed against the wall, holding him up so his legs don't give out.

What has you weak in the knees isn't the way he's got his hands in your hair, pulling your mouth down the length of his cock. Holding it there for a moment only to slide you right back off. Or the way he's using your throat to chase his own high, his thighs flexing under the touch of your palm. It's the way he's kept eye contact with you this entire time, the way his eyes are watching every little thing you do. No matter how intense it all feels or gets, he can't break away.

You have him in this trance that only seems to break when he feels himself getting close. When he tries to pull away, he feels your hands grab at his thighs, a small moan pulled from him again when you dig your nails into his flesh.

"Fuuuck...Sh-shit I'm cumming!" How sweet of him to give you a warning. With a hum you shot him a wink.

That did it. The little gesture was too much for Kyle. A shiver that feels oh too good shoots down his spine as thick ropes of cum spill into your mouth. Kyle pulls out after some time, carefully holding the side of your face as you drink down the bitter climax.

You raise to your feet with a smile, as he takes his hand away to tuck himself back into his pants. Once he's finishes, he cups your face and pulls you back towards him.

"That was...you're incredible."

"I know. But it's nice to hear." You chuckle as he pressed another kiss into your temple. "Don't think I'm done with you yet handsome. Say you walk me home and we enjoy the night to ourselves."

"I think I'd like that. Wanna sneak out the back?" With a grin you take his hand and lead him out of the room. Kyle will never ever admit to Eric that his plan somehow magically worked. But when the time comes for Eric to collect that one fifty, Kyle will make sure he gets it. At least then its bragging rights.

[dystychiphxbia]

☆ - on a different league | narumiya mei

this could've been a longer story but the daiya fandom is not at its peak anymore so i decided to sum it up into this one shot but it just doesn't have the right vibe </3 i did finish it though so im posting it, not proofread she/her pronouns for reader wc: 1.7k

You met Narumiya Mei in your first year of high school.

You went to Inashiro for their track team. During middle school, you harbored some honorable records and thus managed to score a scholarship - your parents would've never afforded to send you to a private school otherwise.

You were excited for your new school life - focusing on your club activities and training hard, getting new friends...You never thought that Narumiya Mei would become part of your life.

He was your classmate. He had charm, you had to admit, and soon enough your whole class seemed to be infatuated with him. But you could see past that.

"And then I got the guy with my ultra super awesome changeup-"

"Changeup? What was that, again?" A smug grin appeared on your face as you watched Narumiya's smile drop. You were now in your second year, and he had gotten into the habit of bragging to you whenever he did something "cool".

"I've told you tons of times, (L/n)!! Are you stupid or something?!" "You've seen my grades, Narumiya. I think that answers your question." You watched the blond grit his teeth.

Narumiya was someone who did not need to worry about his grades - his future lay in baseball. Yet ever since your first year, he wanted to compete with you in every single subject. He just never failed to get the hint - that academically speaking - you would always be superior.

"She's so infuriating, Masa-san!!" Was Narumiya's most common phrase when he arrived to practice. And everyone knew that they were in for a long rant about Narumiya's so-called 'enemy'. They had started placing bets on when their ace would realize that he was most likely head over heels for you.

If one of them even hinted at something like that, Narumiya's face would twist and turn into a look of grimace, and he pretended like he was about to throw up.

But the thing is, even he was not so sure why he was so keen on speaking with you. Everyone else always enjoyed talking with him, he just had tons of charisma, you know? But, you. You. You never smiled, genuinely, only grinned smugly whenever you somehow gained the upper hand. You didn't know the rules of baseball despite attending a school that regularly went to Koshien - and the rules wouldn't stick in your head no matter how many times he explained them to you.

And you. You always focused in class, wrote your notes diligently, raised your hand way too often. You would only ever look at him to glare if he was whispering too hard with some other (female) classmate. "Jealous?" His smug grin would ask you - and you would raise your hand, outing him to the teacher for disturbing class.

You never came to any of the baseball team's games. He always asked you, even invited you, but you always said that you weren't interested. Sure, Narumiya knew that you had your own club, in fact, he heard that you were one of the track team's most promising members. But everyone else found time to come to the games, at minimum the finals, why didn't you?

Seriously, who came to Inashiro and then claimed to not be interested in baseball?

He would occasionally see you running around the campus. The track field was high quality and had plenty of space, yet you would always warm up by running around the school grounds. Why, he did not know.

He did once ask you, but you just shrugged. "I enjoy watching the other clubs being hard at work." "Even the baseball team?" "No, not the baseball team."

You were strange.

Maybe that's why he always seemed to spot you in crowds. You were different - and not entirely in a bad way.

''(L/n), do you have any friends?''

Your brows furrowed - you did not like what he was implying. ''What kind of question is that, Narumiya? I have plenty of friends.'' ''Is that why you are always sitting alone and reading a book?'' Your eyes darted up from your book. Narumiya was sitting on the chair in front of your desk, facing you, and resting his head on your desk.

''Are you trying to imply that I'm a loner?'' ''Well, you are always alone, aren't you?'' ''No, Narumiya. I'm always with you.''

That afternoon, Inashiro's ace pitcher couldn't focus in practice. He was always surrounded by people, whether or not you were there. He hadn't even realized that he did spend a lot of time with you.

''Masa-san, I think she's a witch.'' He had announced in the bullpen. ''Hah? That's a new one.'' His catcher had answered, kind of curious to see what Narumiya had on his mind this time. ''Yes, she's a witch. And she's put a spell on me.''

The school year seemed to fly by. The baseball team went to Koshien in the summer, got defeated, and tried again in the fall. Yet they had lost in a game that was supposed to be a guaranteed win. And yet again, you were not there to watch. Narumiya tried to spot you in the bleachers, even though he knew that you wouldn't be there.

''You aren't bragging about your latest game.'' You pointed out, closing the lid of you lunchbox. ''We lost, (L/n). There's nothing to brag about.'' The blond whined, glaring at you for reminding him. ''Really? You didn't do even one good play?''

Narumiya thought back to the moment he had disagreed with his catcher - his first mistake. It all just went downhill from there. ''No, this time there really isn't anything to brag about.''

''Ah, is that so? So are you still crying yourself to sleep every night, then?'' Narumiya narrowed his eyes at your words. ''No! I've gotten over it already!''

He had never realized, but you actually knew quite a lot about him. ''I think she's a mind reader, Itsuki!'' ''Mei-san...you've been classmates with her for two years...'' ''She can read minds, I'm telling you!!''

Whatever helps him sleep at night.

You were now both third years. You found it hard to describe your relationship with Narumiya. On the outside it really did seem like you were friends. Because you did often eat lunch together, he would tell you about his baseball team and you would always find something to make a witty remark about.

But you did not have his phone number, you did not talk about what either of you did during the weekend, you never laughed at his jokes.

You weren't sure how to feel about him.

You never decided to be friends. And thus, you think that you aren't. Because Narumiya was out of reach for you, so far away.

Yet you found yourself reaching for him. Hanging onto the little thread he was handing to you, which he would eventually just cut down. Because you just weren't meant for each other.

''She was quiet today.'' Narumiya's expression was difficult to read, but he seemed distressed, at least in Itsuki's mind. You held such power over him, Itsuki was worried that they would one day lose a whole game because of you.

''Who was quiet?''

Narumiya was about to throw another pitch, but instead dropped the ball on the ground. He looked at you, his mouth wide open. ''(L-L-L/n)?!'' His hand trembled as he pointed at you.

''Yes, it's me. You look like you've seen a ghost, Narumiya.'' You were clearly fighting back a laugh. This was the first time Itsuki had ever seen you - and you did not match Narumiya's stories at all. You were beautiful.

Suddenly Itsuki understood why Narumiya paid so much attention to you.

''W-w-what are you doing here?!'' You had never shown any interest in baseball, yet here you are, standing on the field. You are wearing your track uniform - seems like you were in the middle of warming up.

''Oh, me?'' You pointed at yourself, acting like you were confused. ''Yes, you! Don't play dumb!'' At this point, Narumiya had stomped over to you - his pitching practice long forgotten.

''Oh, I'm here to see my little brother.''

''Huh?''

''You know. My little brother. The one who joined the team this year.''

''WHAT?''

Itsuki connected the dots. But for Narumiya, it seemed impossible. ''Who's your little brother?!'' ''...(L/n)? Do you not know your first years by name?'' ''No, I do not! Point them out for me!'' He grabbed your shoulders, turning you towards where all the first years were currently running.

You squinted your eyes trying to spot your younger brother in the crowd. When you finally did so, you raised your hand to point in that direction, and Narumiya desperately tried to follow your line of sight. ''Him, over there. The one with (hc) hair.'' ''That's one of our most promising rookies???!!!!!!''

He turned you around, shaking you around lightly. ''You claimed to know nothing about baseball! And now you are telling me that a super rookie is your little brother?!'' ''Did I claim that? Oops, I lied.'' You stuck your tongue out at him.

Narumiya's hands left your shoulders - slumping down. ''I can't believe you have lied to me all these years...''

You laughed. Oh, you laughed for a long time.

You had started the game of acting dumb because you enjoyed the reactions Narumiya gave you. And, because you wanted to kick him off his high horse - to you, it seemed like you were successful.

''I'm so hurt, (Y/n)!! How could you!'' Your laughter stopped. Did he not even notice that he called you by your first name? It was a stage you thought you could never reach.

''Mei-san, the coach will get angry at you if you don't get back to practice...'' The younger catcher tried to grab the ace's attention - who just continued sulking. Itsuki gave you an apologetic smile, but you just shook your head. You were used to Narumiya being like this.

Your little brother had noticed you and came to talk to you, but instead he was startled by their team's ace pitcher. ''You-! Why didn't you tell me that you were related to (Y/n)?!'' Narumiya had pointed at him, accusing him of withholding information. In truth, your little brother did not even know that you were ''friends'' with Narumiya Mei.

Sighing, you had flicked Narumiya's forehead. ''Don't drag my dear little brother into this. I was the one playing with you this whole time.'' Narumiya held his forehead, refusing to admit that it actually hurt, though his expression said otherwise.

''Then...as an apology, will you come to our next game?''

''I'd be happy to, Mei.''