#so by the time he realizes there's like a DILF-sexual Support Group meeting Wednesday nights in the boot room

[leupagus]

Friendship between mardia and I was probably a mistake but like, WHOSE mistake is still a question

leupagus: I'm saying, maybe we don't get ted/trent but maybe we get something

mardia: god, let us PRAY

leupagus: trent/colin

leupagus: god that would be hilarious

mardia: I will die

leupagus: trent takes colin's keys away

mardia: The entire team thanks him

leupagus: ...actually if trent knows how to drive a vintage mercedes he can definitely handle a lambourghini

leupagus: which would probably be distressingly hot to Colin

leupagus: god now I want a Ted/Trent fic from the POV of a sadly pining Colin

leupagus: but like I feel somehow that Trent is exactly Colin's type

mardia: Oh NO

mardia: I love it

leupagus: like, Trent gets locked out of his car and Colin comes out next

leupagus: IDK how but somehow it results in Trent driving Colin's car

mardia: Ooooooh

mardia: And he drives it like a DREAM

leupagus: YES

leupagus: And Trent's making all these thoughtful like, humming noises as he tests the handling

leupagus: and Colin is like I AM HAVING ALL THESE THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS?? OH NO

leupagus: so they like, go to Trent's flat and he goes and gets his spare keys

leupagus: oh no wait

leupagus: Colin DRIVES him to his flat

leupagus: and Trent is just like, white-knuckling the whole way

leupagus: halfway there Trent turns to him and is like "I appreciate you trying to make me throw up as vengeance for the article I wrote, but Coach Lasso has already forgiven me"

leupagus: and Colin's like "all right, first of all, I didn't know you'd written the article, I just thought  you were somebody's hot dad"

leupagus: "and second, I'm not trying to do anything, this is just a very challenging car to drive and not everyone can appreciate her handling"

leupagus: Trent: you've been in first gear this whole time

mardia: like a red flag in front of a Bull

leupagus: YEP

leupagus: so then on the way BACK Trent bullies him out of the driver's seat and then makes Colin pop a boner with how well he handles it

leupagus: god Trent probably lectures him about stick shift handling

leupagus: how you have to be tender with it

leupagus: and Colin is like "oh god oh god oh god"

leupagus: and Trent gets out and happily tootles off in his own car and Colin's still just hunched over in the passenger seat

leupagus: like "oh nooooooooooo"

mardia: God when the team finds out about Ted and Trent

mardia: Everyone’s eying Trent up suspiciously

mardia: Except for poor Colin

mardia: The side eye that Isaac gives him when Colin’s all “I think he’s nice!”

leupagus: YES

leupagus: oh god so - how old is colin supposed to be

leupagus: like early 20s?

mardia: Early 20s yeah

mardia: I’d say 22-23

leupagus: so remember how you were at that age when you had a crush on someone

leupagus: and you didn't want people to know WHO but you still wanted to TALK about it

mardia: Lol yes

leupagus: so Colin starts talking about this guy he met

leupagus: named

leupagus

: Brent Crisp

mardia: COLIN

leupagus: Because Isaac asked what's his name then and Colin panicked

leupagus: And when Trent starts hanging around doing the story and/or working for RIchmond or whayever

leupagus: none of the himbos figure out who it is

leupagus: Beard knows instantly and doesn't say shit

leupagus: Roy finds out somehow, probably through Keeley

leupagus: marches into Trent's office and like, lifts him bodily by the collar with his other arm wound back

leupagus: "HAVE YOU BEEN FUCKING COLIN?"

leupagus: Trent: ...no??? put me down???????

leupagus: Roy: Oh. All right

leupagus: and leaves

leupagus: Ted, who was also in the office and just kind of froze up, is like "I'll uh, go uh, talk to him?" and Trent is like "I quit I hate all of these assholes"

mardia: OH NOOOOOO

leupagus: or is it funnier if Roy goes barging into his office with the intention of lifting him up by the collar

leupagus: only to find Ted planting one on Trent

mardia: OMG THE SECOND ONE

leupagus: and being like "oh -OH. Uh. Oh."

mardia: he’s too startled to be outraged

leupagus: Well I think it'd take him about ten seconds

leupagus: and then he'd be like "SO YOU'RE FUCKING TED AND COLIN??"

leupagus: And Trent can make like a revolted face

mardia: “He’s an INFANT, so no”

leupagus: "Colin thinks it's pronounce 'Prowst,' I could never"

leupagus: Ted could be like "I think I can safely say Trent's had very little free time these past few weeks to start a relationship with someone else at Richmond, so"

leupagus: and Trent gets distracted from imminent death at Roy's hands by the word "relationship"

mardia: Omg!!!!!!!

leupagus: THE END

leupagus: Now I can post this on tumblr and never actually have to write it

mardia: Ahahahahah

leupagus: NOT KIDDING

leupagus: CEE AND PEE BABY