#so I usually double them up together with their setup or payoff

[tlbodine]

Overthinking: Egg Monsters from Mars

Egg Monsters From Mars is Goosebumps #42, released in the spring of '96. I remember this one's cover but had never read it. I think I had a vague sense that it would be dumb, as a kid, which is a real shame because I actually thought this was refreshingly good in a run of so-so mid-era Goosebumps books. Let's see what it's about and what's special about it...

First, the Plot: Dana Johnson is a scientifically-minded kid with a couple scientist parents and a bratty little sister who tends to get whatever she wants. Since her birthday is close to Easter this year, she asked for an egg hunt for her party. All of her friends start hunting eggs in the yard, but the party swiftly descends into chaos when it's discovered that her mom didn't bother hard-boiling them. The ensuing egg fight makes a huge mess and sours their parents to the entire topic of eggs, which is a real shame because Dana found a very unusual egg down by the creek.

It's big. It's covered in veins. And it's pulsating.

Since his parents won't listen to him when he tries to explain, he puts it in his sock drawer, where it hatches into a...big quivering blob that looks kind of like scrambled eggs with beady eyes. He tries to show it to his best friend, who's less impressed by it than she should be, and encourages him to go take it to a laboratory in town. He does, and there encounters Dr. Gray.

At first, Dr. Gray seems very friendly. He explains that he's familiar with these creatures, that he's been studying them awhile and believes they are from Mars and came to earth via a meteor shower recently. He has them in a special part of his lab that's kept nice and cold so they don't overheat and melt.

The problem is that now that Dana has come into contact with them, Dr. Gray won't let him leave. So he keeps him locked in the lab with them. He spends a long, shivery night as a prisoner. His dad comes looking for him but cannot see him through the double-sided mirror Dr. Gray has set up. And the doctor is infuriated when Dana learns to communicate with the monsters and they merge together into a blanket to warm him in the night.

Dr. Gray insinuates that he needs to kill Dana to keep him quiet. Dana manages to escape with the help of the egg monsters. He explains what happened to his parents, who are deeply concerned but skeptical. When they go back to the lab, the egg monsters and the doctor are gone without a trace.

Dana gets examined by the family doctor and seems to be just fine. Except he has a new habit.....laying eggs.

Overthinking It:

There are few things Stine loves more than an evil scientist, likely owing to the popularity of that trope in his childhood (between Atomic Age uneasiness and Hays Code restrictions on the supernatural, scientists were the villains of many '40s and '50s horror movies). Some of his best books hinge on the stranger-danger of an adult with authority who means a child harm, and that's on display here.

Dr. Gray is straight up chilling (no pun intended). His cold, calculated approach to science and his complete heel-face-turn when it comes to excitedly sharing his find with Dana but his willingness to sacrifice the kid to the altar of science is legitimately frightening. Here is a book where the real monster is institutional power, and the alien creatures are misunderstood allies. Guillermo Del Toro would love this shit.

Something else I enjoyed about Egg Monsters is its willingness to deviate from some of Stine's usual stock character types. It's a refreshing change of pace to have Dana be a serious, studious, thoughtful kid as opposed to our usual practical joker type. His friend Anne brings some of that energy to the table, which is fine in the few scenes she's in. But having Dana be more solemn really helps sell the gravity of this situation.

Also, I can only imagine how terrifying this whole thing must have been for his parents!

I will say that the egg-fight setup and payoff does go on for quite a while. Like it takes up soooo much narrative space and that feels a little filler-y. But by the same token, the ensuing chaos of the egg goo everywhere is its own kind of horror. A birthday party descending into a food fight, where your friends won't listen even when you're begging them to stop, where the damage is real and lasting, where the crowd acts of its own accord and behaves as a mindless force of destruction....that is already pretty frightening, actually. It's played with a deft hand here because eggs are ultimately mostly harmless but it's easy to imagine these kids frenzying in some other, more horrifying way.

Honestly, this one is floating up to the top for me. I'll put this one up next to Cuckoo Clock of Doom for some of Stine's best experimental writing.

If You Liked This, THESE Will Really Give You Goosebumps:

I'm not joking about Del Toro here. If you like stories where the "monster" is misunderstood and the real villain is a regular guy with a cold-hearted commitment to his job, you're gonna love The Shape of Water.

If you wanted the egg monsters themselves to be a bigger threat, may I direct you instead to Alien?

Also a shout-out to Critters, which also come to earth in the form of supremely weird eggs

[theashemarie]

Do you have any advice about how to write humor? I feel like I have tons of experience reading and writing angst and stuff, but funny stuff is so hard to get right and you always manage to get legitimate chuckles out of me. How do you pull it off?

Honestly, it comes from practice. I know that's never the answer anyone wants, but you kinda just have to buckle down and churn out a bunch of duds for jokes. I don't have a nugget of wisdom about the nature of humor because I mostly just write stuff that I personally think is funny and it's a bonus if other people laugh.

A few pointers though:

Timing is everything. This is one you really can't teach because it's all wrapped up in pacing, which is something you have to learn as you go. Once you get a good feeling for pacing, the timing of jokes will come to you.

Don't have too many jokes per capita. You can't overload a piece with joke after joke. There has to be emotional meat there for the reader to chew on, and a good joke will usually enhance the tension. (Or relieve it, if you've been cranking the tension up for a bit.) For example, most of the jokes in the first chapter of The Old College Try are used to show how Leo and Donnie are antagonizing each other while they're pretending to be human. They're venting steam, Leo is pushing Donnie a little to show how unhappy he is with this situation, and Donnie is challenging him in return to show that he's not willing to give in.

Jokes should be used to characterize. When a character says something funny, it needs to be in character and possibly reveal something about them. A joke for joke's sake is fine, but, like everything else in narrative building, if it pulls double duty it hits that much harder.

Read, read, read. If you're reading something that makes you laugh, stop. Read it back. Figure out why it made you laugh and how the writer put it together. The great thing about writing is that you can see exactly how the pieces were put on the page to get the desired result!

Katie (@katiemonz) and I like to have what we call "load-bearing jokes" that we come up with early in the brainstorming process (she's my sounding board for everything). These jokes work both as moments of tension release, but also usually act as setups and payoffs for huge emotional arcs down the line. Jokes can be signposts to work toward or subtle set ups for important details later!

But yeah, like I said, humor is super hard to get right so you kinda just have to practice ^^; Good luck!

[revwinchester]

BattleXoom

Summary: The Reader and Charlie spend a night playing their favorite online video game.

Pairing: Charlie x Reader

Word Count: 1464

Rating: Teen and Up

Warnings: a little bit of cursing, allusions to sex/sexual activities

A/N: This is for week 6 of the SPN Hiatus Writing Challenge hosted by @thing-you-do-with-that-thing!  There are 2 prompts in here, a line of dialogue, which is bolded, and a gif, which is inserted when it becomes relevant.  Thanks for hosting the challenge this summer, Kari!  Also, I made up the video game in this fic and any similarity to a real game/games is completely coincidental.  I’m more of a single player, first person shooter with a solid story line kind of gamer myself (Fallout 4 is my jam right now).

BattleXoom -

“Hush woman and let me choose!” you playfully shouted at Charlie as you scrolled through the available characters on your screen, reminding yourself of the pros and cons to each one.  It had been so long since you’d played anyone but Torrex and you were determined to branch out this time.  It’s not like the two of you were playing for tournament points or anything, you were logged into your “just for fun” accounts so that you could mess around in game without fear of ruining your stats or reputation.

“If you really loved me there wouldn’t be a choice,” Charlie replied and you could practically hear her pout through the headphones you were wearing.  She had already selected Raven, her usual character, and was waiting rather impatiently for you to make your character selection.  “You’re already making me play on the laggy server because you’re stuck on hotel wifi.  At least let me destroy some bitches tonight!”

You sighed into the microphone.  “Fine,” you acquiesced, scrolling back to select your usual character, “but remember, the last time we played as Raven and Torrex on these accounts, someone recognized our style from Twitch or a tournament or something and called us out.”

You and Charlie were one of the highest ranking partnerships worldwide in BattleXoom, a video game that you both loved.  After realizing how well you worked together in game, the two of you started competing in tournaments and eventually worked your way into bigger and bigger competitions, most recently coming in second at an invitation only tournament hosted by the game’s publisher at a major video gaming convention.  

You had first met Charlie in an online forum for people looking for a partner to game with and, after playing a few rounds together, you realized that you lived two towns away and had decided to meet for coffee.  You had been a little hesitant at first, you used an androgynous username because girl gamers aren’t all that accepted in the gaming world and neither of you had spoken to the other over anything but typed messages at that point.  However, you had found instant chemistry on the game and hoped that, whoever this CharlieCodex dude was, he wouldn’t throw that away because you were a woman.  You were pleasantly surprised to learn that Charlie was also a woman, that her name was short for Charlene, and that your chemistry carried over into real life.  

The one thing you loved more than the game was Charlie and you knew she felt the same way about you.  Sure, the game was was the thing that had brought you together - as well as bringing you a modicum of internet fame - but you were certain that the two of you would last well beyond BattleXoom’s height of popularity.  

Normally, you and Charlie would spend a Monday night side by side in your home office, engaging in battle together before retiring to your bedroom and engaging in a different kind of activity together but your job had sent you out of town for the week and you weren’t due to return home until late on Thursday.  So, instead of settling into on your comfy chair at home with your custom setup, your multi-screen display, and your girlfriend, you were sitting in a wooden chair, hunched over a tiny desk, and playing on your laptop with shitty graphics, all while using the hotel’s internet to connect to the only BattleXoom server that would support the casual gamer that you appeared to be this evening.

As soon as you and Charlie both selected characters you were transported into the game where you would have to battle against other teams of two for control of the map.  The graphics didn’t move as smoothly as you were used to but you soon got the hang of things, systematically taking out your opponents as you and Charlie worked your way towards the center of the map over the next 30 minutes or so.  

It was your signature style, one that Charlie had come up with, and, although many had tried, no one had really been able to replicate the way the two of you played the game with the same amount of success you had found.  It worked for the two of you, though, and that was all that mattered as you took out one of the two remaining teams on the map.   The last team was all the way across the island and you and Charlie directed your characters through the jungle towards them.

“I’ve only got the one screen tonight, Char.  I’m gonna need you to tell me what you’ve got on these guys,” you requested.

BattleXoom worked in such a way that one half of the screen could display stats about the game and the players, giving you some info about your opponents’ statistics as the game progressed.  You and Charlie had gotten pretty good at reading into those statistics and being able to extrapolate play style and experience level from the information the game provided.  Without your dual monitors that you had at home, though, you had decided to disable that feature so you could have a better view of the game itself, trusting Charlie to tell you everything you needed to know throughout the melee.  

Charlie filled you in on what to expect when you met the other pair that remained on the map.  They seemed like a pretty good team, considering which server you were playing on and you were looking forward to the fight.  You were lost in listening to her analysis and not paying as close of attention to the screen in front of you as you should have been and you ended up paying the price for that.

“Shit,” you heard Charlie say just as your health meter took a major hit.  

Realizing that the other team had set a trap that you then walked right into, you both sprang into action, defending yourselves and lashing out with attacks whenever you were able.  Eventually, you regained the upper hand, your experience with the game becoming exceedingly useful and increasingly evident.  

“Should we do it?” you asked Charlie.

She knew what you meant immediately.  “It” was a move that even some of the top teams in the world had trouble executing.  Each character pairing in the game had their own signature “double down” move, as the game called it, and the level of difficulty varied depending on the pair you picked.  Torrex and Raven had the most difficult double down to get right but the payoff was huge and you and Charlie had mastered it, though you seldom used it in free-play situations like this.  However, after the trap the other team had laid, you were willing to make an exception here.

“Hells yeah!” Charlie exclaimed as she set herself up, counting on you to get into position as well.  “On three!”

You both counted together, it was imperative that you both hit the right buttons at exactly the right time or the move wouldn’t work.  

“One… Two… Three!” 

Your fingers mashed the buttons in quick succession and you hoped that Charlie and you would be in sync even when separated by hundreds of miles.  You were and you smiled as you watched the screen.  Your character, Torrex, lifted Charlie’s into the air, holding onto her shoulder and her waist as he swung her in a wide circle.  Raven kicked out and knocked your opponents onto their backs, killing one of them and seriously damaging the other.  

Once Raven was back on the ground, it only took two or three more basic attacks to win the game.

After your victory was announced, you were transported back to a menu screen.  “You want to play again?” Charlie asked you through your headset.

“I’m sorry, Char, I’ve gotta get up early tomorrow morning so I should probably call it a night,” you apologized.  “I’ll make it up to you when I get home, though.  Promise.”

You and Charlie said your good nights and signed off of the server and you shutdown your computer, putting it away before you got ready for bed.  As you were brushing your teeth, your phone rang.  You looked at the name on the screen and quickly spit out the toothpaste and rinsed your mouth quickly.

“Hey, babe, what’s up?” you greeted Charlie through the phone.

“Nothing,” she responded simply.

Charlie wasn’t usually one to call just for idle chit-chat.  That was what texting was for, you had heard her tell someone once.  “You know I love you and I love to hear your voice but why are you calling, then?” you asked.

“Victory phone sex.  Duh,” Charlie replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

ALL THE TAGS! (forevers): @deathtonormalcy56 @supernaturalyobsessed @roxy-davenport @sumara62 @ginamsmith @gallifreyansass

Charlie Tags from @mrswhozeewhatsis: @mrswhozeewhatsis @vintagevalentinexx @thinkwritexpress-official @itsemmyb @beriala @crzcorgi @ellen-reincarnated1967 @deerlululucy @growleytria @thegleegeneration @SinceriouslyAmellPadalecki @sis-tafics @meganwinchester1999 @kittenofdoomage @prettyxwickedxthings @lilyoflothlorien @myfand0msandm0re @olitzisbae @iridianuniverse @shortandlongstories @ackleslaugh @roxy-davenport @chrisatplay @faith-in-dean @kreborn17 @for-the-love-of-dean @zanthiasplace @gadreelsforbiddenfruit @curliesallovertheplace @not-so-natural-spn @skybinx-blog @feelmyroarrrr @beachy2014 @deansleather @jotink78 @lucifer-in-leather @notnaturalanahi @howmanytuesdaysdidyouhave @babypieandwhiskey @mysaintsasinner @klaineaholic @supernaturalismalife

Pond Charlie Tags: @manawhaat @notnaturalanahi @bkwrm523 @roxy-davenport @jelly-beans-and-gstrings @deansleather @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname @mrswhozeewhatsis @wi-deangirl77 @deantbh @deanwinchesterforpromqueen @chaos-and-the-calm67 @memariana91 @teamfreewill-imagine @your-average-distracted-waffle @deals-with-demons @faith-in-dean @winchestersmolder