#smoko and mirrors

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

She did.... it was, worrying but, now I understand. WHY DID THE LITTLE ANTI-CHRIST STAND CLOSEST TO ME!?

Maybe in another timeline you and her were close.

Maybe if hell froze over.

You just know Tessa probably begged them to let the drones be in the photo with them. (Murder Drones)

There's no way she didn't.

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

Starter for @copper-9spurgatory - Of Libraries, Wolves, Brass and Ghosts

The only light on was in the library of the ruined mansion on Copper9, the very manor that Tessa would've had if she lived and became a company delegate. The ghostly woman sat reading her novel at a table, the candle light bathing her in a golden light helping hide her greys but not doing any favours for the ironically-named laugh lines around her eyes. She heard a creak of the floorboard but didn't look. "I don't want to talk to you James... I'm reading!"

[minimum-wage-commando]

I was tagged by @fist-fuck (lol what a sentence) to list 10 songs by different artists that I like. 

So here we go.

The Birthday Massacre - Kill the Lights

The Chats - Smoko

Placebo - Protège Moi

Boy Harsher - Your Body Changes Everything

Preoccupations - Silhouettes

Deftones - Be Quiet and Drive (Far Away)

dip -  13階段への荒野

HEALTH, Nine Inch Nails - ISN’T EVERYONE

Kikagaku Moyo - Smoke and Mirrors

Matmos - Kendo for Yukio Mishima

for the homies who i know just love tagging games @kaumnyakte-ultra @fowox @lovotomii @aonaranacht @ixvillia and anyone else who feels like it

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

if you have a question about aussie slang, for a fic or whatevs, please just ask i don't know all of it, but we do have some fun words and sayings that are day to day statements

esp. the more rural you go

not everyone has the full accent though, because you do get a lot of pressure at work to come across... professional or whatever.

the only one i've never been sure of being an Actual Phrase, or if it Became A Phrase after popularisation on a tv show, is "Stone the Flaming Crows" bc a dude from Neighbours used to say it frequently.

examples of day to day stuff i can think of right now

mad as a frog in a sock (angry about something, went off, off the shits)

mad as a cut snake (usually means 'they're nuts', but can also mean they exploded with anger, usually contextual)

she'll be right (it's fine - can be a flippant statement, can be reassurance, etc)

drongo / galah - (idiot, not very smart, wanker, etc)

dunny = toilet

thunderbox/outhouse / long-drop - usually outdoor toilet

dry as a nun's nasty / dry as a dead dingo's donger (I am thirsty, or It Is Hot AF/we need rain so bad)

chuck a u-ey (do a u-turn)

Oi! (Hey I want your attention/i was surprised, general exclamation, stop that, you are in a lot of fucking trouble mate - depends on the tone of voice and volume) like "OI!" says aunty ruth has just found her dentures in jello and she knows you did it, etc

Bugger off (go away, or sometimes a statement of disbelief)

Yeah nah /Nah yeah (can mean yes, no or maybe depending on what was said directly before the statement)

you cant pull the wool over my eyes - you can't lie to me like that / i can see you are not telling the truth

shut your gob / put a sock in it / put a cork in it - (shut up / shut the FUCK up / close your mouth or i will shut it for you) depends on tone

Ya wally (you idiot)

Roo = kangaroo

o = can be affixed to anything to shorten it at the servo - gone to the service station, arvo - afternoon, smoko - morning tea, bottlo - where the grog is

goon/goonsack - wine in a box

grog - alcohol

stubbie - beer, ususally

boardies - board shorts

rashie - swimming shirt,

slip, slop, slap - ancient proverb for avoiding sunburn. singing pelican.

thongs - footwear

sheila = female / woman, don't hear this a lot at the moment tbh except in certain contexts or from specific people

'Getting rowdy' = things are heating up, people are riled up, a fight is about to/has just broken out, etc.

DJ's like a mad cunt = one very specific meme about a bad PM we had like 10 years ago. i can't tell you how many PM's ago, it's been game of thrones here lmao

Beyond the black stump / Out whoop-whoop / references to timbuktu (quite a distance away)

strewth!/crickey!/bloody hell - (exclamation of surprise, expletive replacement, etc)

flat out like a lizard drinking (tired / drunk / exhausted / sleeping)

pull a harry holt - (I've heard a dozens variations of this one, it means Go Missing / Disappear, often used as a joke. PM Holt went swimming one day and disappeared)

have a stickybeak (to poke your nose in/investigate/look around)

chuck a wobbly/throw a tanty/chuck a tanty/throw a wobbly (throw a tantrum, i have legit never seen anyone successfully deescalate a situation by telling someone not to chuck a wobbly or throw a tanty, go figure lmao)

bogan - (very specific kind of low-income, generally white, people. sort of like rednecks, but with more stereotypical aussie features like a mullet, singlet tops, sunnies, stubbies, etc. tend to fall under the liberal party ideology - who are our republicans... )

ankle-biters / rugrats / little takkers / gremlins / nippers - (kids, usually the littler ones)

tiff - argument, small fight (had a tiff, had a row)

pav = pavlova

piss/whizz/take a piss = going to pee

vegemite - delicious

Kiwi = New Zealander

Banana benders - the disrespectful bs that apparently other states call anyone living in Queensland, the wankers

station - farming areas that have sheep or livestock usually, have farmhands etc.

dole bludger(s) - (anyone on Centrelink, whether they want to be or not, with no other employment. but like, a lot of people on centrelink have a job that does not cover enough and need additional financial supports to meet a minimum wage, or are students or apprentices, etc. there are people who go on centrelink on and off to avoid engaging in the jobseeking stuff, they are the real dole bludgers, but a lot of richer people tend to call anyone on 'welfare' bludgers)

don't you come the raw prawn with me - (do not lie to me / don't try that shit with me, mate / I wasn't born yesterday /etc)

dak/dack - to dack someone is to come up behind them and yank their pants down (or skirts). Often taking out your boxers, too.)

budgie smugglers - (speedoes, male swimwear)

togs/toggs or cozzie (swimwear, any kind. cozzie = costume)

mozzie - (mosquito)

better than a kick up the backside /better than a kick in the arse - (pretty self explanatory, one of those phrases parents use to get slightly hurt kids to start laughing and/or coworkers to commisserate about new work rules, etc)

I wouldn't piss on (name) if they were on fire - (self-explanatory, you hate them, or they're a useless tit or an insufferable person /a suckup etc, and you would gladly hand them a match)

one for the road = getting a drink for the road, usually. can also make a joke of it like, "one last piss for the road" = I'm going to the bathroom before I leave

here's your handbag, what's your hurry - probs not an aussie phrase but a common joke in my family

----------------

So like, there's some words and items from Australian Indigenous culture that often get used wrong in stereotypical characters, like saying 'gone walkabout', using 'cooee', making digeridoo jokes, and making some really uncomfy 'savages' statements can be very disrespectful. You might want to go looking into Australia's fucked up policies and historical (and only recent) situations before starting any arguments about this stuff... in many ways it mirrors the cruelty of american colonisers to native american peoples, etc.

Avoid some phrases. Your character gone to cool their head? He's gone off on to soak his head, or he's on his bike (gone away) but he'll be back... You can use 'Oi, dickhead!'

Please don't mock the names of towns or places, they are often the names from the traditional custodians and inhabitants.

-----------------

Random things:

We drive on the left side of the road, driver's side reversed.

More of our cars are automatic than manual. Utes aren't atypical, but bigger vehicles are out in rural areas because more than a few of the rural roads are poorly maintained or dirt, with potholes that yoyo your soul into your body.

If you have a character on a long drive on a non-highway, or rural road: +if you are on a one-lane road and someone is comingthe other way, you both move half-on, half-off; for big vehicles or trucks, you can choose to pull off completely and stop. Just for safety, esp. in rain, fog, mist or late at night. +at one-lane bridges, you have a give way sign on one side. if you want your characters to have a moment of 'pause to look at each other while driving' or 'a quiet moment of reflection', have them wait for another car or truck to pass from the other side. These can be a few metres long, to like, a really long bridge. +They may pass markers that say 'flood level marker' with numbers of 2, 3 or 5 metres. Could be useful to remark on if your fic needs a reason for them to have a crisis. +Bushfire warning signs (from Low to Catastrophic) are frequent +Animal Crossing signs are very frequent, and often have a wildlife rescue number on them +Water restriction signs are in most small towns, they range from levels 1 to 6. This can change what the characters are allowed to do with water in little towns, etc. +You may occasionally find a small servo and one or two houses. +pubs don't open/won't serve alcohol until after 10am. the joke has always been, 'beer on your cornflakes' but you will never be able to actually get that unless you preplanned the night before in your hotel room. +Around dawn and dusk, a lot of animals like hares, kangaroos, wallabies, sometimes echidnas and koalas and little numbat things, and snakes and bushmice will be close to the road. Sometimes dashing across. They do not react logically to cars approaching, and will leap out at random. Hares do this zigzag nonsense. If you need the character to hit the brakes frantically, or swerve, this is a good reason. If you are ever driving here and see an animal on the side of the road, flip lights to low beam, slow down and watch to see how they react. If you can. If there's a truck blaring down on you, you may not be able to.

+Emus are in more rural areas. Echidnas sometimes appear on fringes of towns though.

+Kookaburras are a lovely creature, I have rescued a few and they are nice... but their laugh is very grating when it goes off super early in the morning. They eat snakes (good) and baby birds (not so good).

+Lots of snakes round here. LOTS. Carpet Snakes are pretty common, red-belly black snakes, eastern brown (big danger!!!), whip snakes have declined in my region, keelback snakes, this one black and white banded one we found deceased, etc. Snakes can climb, snakes can SWIM. Putting something that stinks around a campsite MAY help, but not always.

+Never go swimming in a dam you don't own, and that hasn't been checked, and if no one knows where you are. How deep is it? What's on the bottom? How stirred is the water? etc.

+Kangaroos CAN drown you. They have perfected this attack, and will do it to humans, dogs and other pursuers alike. They can also eviscerate you with their hind paws or shatter your ribs with a kick. The 'boxing' they do is exceptionally violent. This seems to surprise people, but like, giraffes can kill each other by slamming their heads into each other, you think a 7 ft swole motherfucking cryptid can't do harm? They can be lovely tho, if they trust you. But DO NOT GO PETTING WILDLIFE.

+Dropbears, austrilanicus vericanthus bitus, are real. We do make jokes about them, but they are a Problem. The pee on yourself thing won't ward them off, that's more about working out which tourists are the most gullible (and if they run with it, the moistest) lmao. Akubras and other thicker-layered headwear,

+We have wild dogs and feral pigs. Do not fuck with the feral pigs, some are HUGE, and no... they're not just pigs who escaped farms, these are MASSIVE motherfuckers who will Get You if they See You. Rustling in the night outside the tent? Good Luck.

+Koalas should not be picked up directly. They have claws, and a lot of them have chamydia. I mean if a character saves one in a fic that's fine I guess, but like... someone's getting antibiotics after that lmao. They are bigger than you think, dumber than you think, and sometimes they have to be chased across a highway with a windscreen cover bc they're not very bright and keep failing to climb metal fences, lmaoooo

+Towns of about 20-30k will have more shops (some franchise, some local owned), servos, fast food places and usually at least two to three shopping centres. Usually small level entertainments like a cinema, or local groups. +Towns with 10-20k, may have one or two major shopping centres, servos (tracks and RVs catered to), possibly a maccas, and the majority of stores will be local-owned. May have a cinema, but not one that has the newest releases. Local council may have more festivals, or 'that one thing they're known for'. +0-10k towns have a small local store, prices usually a bit higher. A servo, often with capacity for trucks. Local festivals. Characters can cop a bit of side-eye in these places, esp. if they don't fit the traditional ideas or are loud/violently american. +Grey nomads are a thing. Old people with fancy caravans who drive So Slow, and move all around aus. Several refused to stop during covid and it was like, WHO DO YOU THNK WE'RE TRYING TO KEEP ALIVE BY STOPPING YOU MOVING THROUGH MULTIPLE TOWNS???

+Some rural areas have legit red dirt, its always super cool to look at. Some places have light brown to dark brown, some have more chalky colours or yellowish dirt. Depends.

+Reminder: Australia has very specific gun laws, if your character/s have weapons then they may need to be sneaky or store them specifically in the vehicle. Although if you're talking about like, mad max type rules, then who cares. But if you have them get into a gun fight in a town, the police will come, etc.

Dunno, just ask if you have a question... just trying to think of random things to paint a picture if you have a character over here for a roadtrip or mission or whatever.

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

And to believe she embarrassed us by playing this at the piano recital in front of JC Jensen execs and Lord Frumplebucket and his family! Horrendous!

I thought it was hilarious and Frumplebucket did too, Louise, you need to chill.

My second Murder Drones AMV, time for something silly!

Song used is The Hours Song (Insomnia Party) by Amanda Ribnick

I could just imagine this after listening to the song for a week. Enjoy the Tessa and Cyn craziness.. with a sprinkle of J

K thanks BYEEEEEE

[petebdog]

Custom Stuffed Animals Manufacturer

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OK, so this may be more of a present for kids' moms and dads, however youngsters are likewise bound to love the vivid, multiple-use tableware from Repurpose, which features 100 percent compostable, plant-based single-use eating products (flatware, straws, plates), and also a line of nontoxic recyclable goods without BPAs, phthalates, PVC, and also PBDEs. The cloth masks presently under production as well as quickly to be sold by Smoko are similar to those made by many various other firms - they're washable and also multiple-use, they have elastic ear straps, and they have a pocket for a filter insert and also a steel band that can be readjusted for a tight fit at the nose. The good news is they're equally as right into the multiple-use kind, which don't create any type of added paper or plastic waste. Good information for wanderlusters old as well as young: Atlas Obscura recently came out with a 2nd edition ($38) of its preferred compendium, An Explorer's Guide to the World's Hidden Wonders. There's nothing quite like being a tween or teenager simply sharpening one's palate for the vast, wild, and weird wonders of the world. Certain, they will certainly travel through the angsty teenager stage first, but ultimately their whole childhood will certainly be in the rearview mirror. One area appears out of a web page of Alice and also Wonderland with formed mirror ceilings and also black and white floor tiles lining the flooring. Many of these ideas can also be begun while your youngster is still proactively living out their youth. Look around if you're still questioning why suppliers pick to pattern their playthings after animals. I was expecting the stuffed pet to look like Buckley, however I really did not envision it would look so much like him. These personalized 4-inch sandstone figurines look like your pet and also include its name on a stand. Your packed animals are custom made according to your desires. Baby gift baskets are valuable as well as helpful and come in different themes. Clients can pick from a huge selection of readily available baby gift baskets or can have one custom made. Constructed from long lasting cotton canvas with a light poly cellular lining, this lovely duffel bag can be customized stitched with a youngster's given name. Whether it's for retail launch, an occasion or trade program, we're experienced at delivering personalized packed toys around the globe, from huge deliveries to little, by sea, air, vehicle, or carrier. If your kids have little playthings with unique definitions, you can buy a clear lamp base as well as fill it with these playthings to proceed to keep those memories active. Your packed animals are custom-made made according to your wishes. Customers can select from a substantial selection of offered infant gift baskets or can have one custom-made made. Made of long lasting cotton canvas with a light poly cellular lining, this charming duffel bag can be custom stitched with a kid's initial name.

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[consumingstyle]

Help! I’m addicted!!

We often hear about how drugs, alcohol and tobacco are an addicting bunch and one should always avoid it if possible. Then sooner and later we are educated on how to say no to peer pressure, so we can keep society safe and in harmony. It is no longer ‘cool’ to take drugs or to smoke or to drink yourself to the ground, well except in countries where it is. Australia for example feels no shame when the entire party district is crawling on their knees or simply passed out on the street from alcohol poisoning, but when it comes to having a ‘smoko’ you are an “unhealthy bastard”. In Europe you can see almost the opposite. However, governments even in both worlds, encourage marketing campaigns against the usage of these substances.

But Agi, why are you talking about drugs and alcohol when we are here to discuss your shopping hauls?

Well, let me answer you that with one sentence.

I am addicted to shopping.

This might not sound too surprising to the people that has been following up with me for a long time and know me from real life. My entire personality is built around the consumption of clothes and fashion products. I encourage people to buy, to spent, and to consume. It is almost like a devil’s circle of never ending wants that I often like to think of as needs

If you are still not convinced, let me tell you how my thinking has changed about my consumption from a scholarly readings.

Through my studies, I have came across many articles, however one stood out, the article by Clive Hamilton titled Affluenza: When is too much never enough?. The article discusses how the habit of never ending consumption is almost like a psychological illness, almost like an addiction, one that is obvious in a Western society. He calls this “mental illness” affluenza which is a mix of the two words affluence and influenza. While Hamilton goes into the extreme of describing habits such as getting into debt from over-consumption, he also focuses on the inability to save. 

While I understand there are many criticism of this writing, unfortunately, while reading this article I have felt like I was holding a mirror in my hand. While I do not go into debt from my over consumption (mostly because I own a debit card), I do find it extremely difficult to save money. While I write these blogs and posts about how much I like to buy this and that and how cute or comfortable it is, behind the scenes I do not mention my bank account balance which has been sitting on the same amount for months now as I spend almost everything I earn. Since I was little, I always found expressing myself through clothes exciting and interesting, I try to dress as my personality but also get inspired by other people who’s style I like. Maybe that’s why my consumption has increased, because my desire to fit into a certain group, and with social media I am exposed to a lot more style and products. Endless possibilities to fit in and express myself.

Online shopping has been the death of me. Endless amount of sites where I can window-shop 24/7, it has almost became a leisure time for me to browse these sites and accounts. When I have free time what do I do? Boom, I go on online shopping! When I am bored what do I do? boom, go online shopping once again. As much as I’d like to save, there is always something new I gotta have and gotta buy. “It is only $50 it won’t make a difference” I often say after probably already spending $150 that week through the same way.

I wish I could say that it isn’t my fault but as I am studying both web media and marketing, it would be ridiculous to say that I had no idea of these powers. On the other hand, I do feel sorry for the majority of the Western population who doesn’t.

Fashion is my drug addiction, which I fight to stop. Doesn’t that sound ridiculous?

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

"It's Dad, stand back I'll get you out," James called to his daughter, aiming the crowbar at the cellar door.

from @xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx

-from the otherside of the door- Tessa? Are you in there?

-she tensed, who was this voice..-

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

Tessa spots the ruined mansion while foraging for ingredients and goes to investigate it in curiosity

@gxc-tessa

James heard the creaking of the floor-boards and went to check it out, assuming it was Louisa. He walked around the corner, not making a sound on account of him being a ghost and came face to face with the green-eyed disassembly drone. "Hullo there," he greeted politely, he couldn't explain why but the drone before him looked familiar, "Are you lost? Do you want help?"

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

Mun art- Recreation of our Halloween Costumes the Year before we had Tessa.

We went as JD and Veronica from Heathers. Louisa hated wearing blue, but I thought she looked beautiful. It was so romantic. Even though the shipping is toxic in the musical, I had fun, and I would've gladly exploded myself for her.

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

Mun Murder Drones Art - True Blue

me and Tessa when she was young, I'm singing to her

I miss times like these... I am so sorry for everything that's happened to her and because of my neglect

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

HOW VERY DARE YOU CALL ME OUT LIKE THAT!

You probably faint like a Victorian woman.

No, that would be my mother.

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

@nate-doorman-elliot

"d-does it annoy ya? I took the Elliot name?"

Good heavens, lad, not at all! I'm happy you're a part of the extended family now.

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

What I look like unshadowed

Because only Tessa can see me without shadows. Such a pity Cyn decapitated me, it permanently stained my blonde and it left a hideous scar on my neck!

[xxsmoko-n-mirrorsxx]

Send in the asks. It's time for mid morning smoko and I'm feeling bored.