#shouldn't use death as an emotional weapon. sui is a heavy personal choice not a malicious little jab at people you don't like.
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neverendingford · 1 year ago
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#tag talk#maybe I'm too angry at things.#do you think I'm too angry at things?#I think I have a lot to be angry about.#I had a lot to be angry about when I was five years old and I've just been collecting since then#I think children should be allowed to be angry. and I never was. I wasn't even angry. I didn't have anger issues#or. well.. I suppose not being angry at all ever is in fact an issue. so therefore it's an anger issue.#just making up for lost time I guess. healing starts with crying and screaming and being sad and being mad#wanting to kill your parents is perhaps a healthy part of growing up I think. yeah. let's keep telling ourselves that. seems reasonable#honestly though I'm glad I never actually died because I don't wanna imagine the shit my parents would have said at my christian funeral#I need to outlive them so no one is ever tempted to pray over my fucking casket.#I wish ghosts were real cause imagine a pastor preaching at my funeral and then his head just fuckin explodes from my ghost powers#dog could you imagine? shear chaos. pure vindictive spite. Anyway I'm just Hannah Baker-ing this now huh.#shouldn't use death as an emotional weapon. sui is a heavy personal choice not a malicious little jab at people you don't like.#if you leave an argument you shouldn't stick your head back in the room to get the partying shot. leave and never think about them again#except that you can escape in real life. it's not next life or bust. there's other options. remember that. it's not just one way of escape#oh I just realized why I feel this way. my dad's coming over with furniture shit. that's why I'm mad as hell rn. hhhh this too will pass.#unpleasantly. but it'll pass nonetheless.
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