#she's so fucked up i love her
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You know that WWII comic about death as a sexy lady with a skull head telling a young man “Come in, dear boy, I’ll treat you well, I used to know your daddy”? That’s Cytherea & Gideon
wait oh my god you're right. It's literally them.
"Come on in, I'll treat you right. I used to know your Daddy"
Or it would be, if she had ever bothered to tell her about her daddy
#but nooooo not even good strong girls get information for free#do they cytherea?#even the gruesome spectre of war is more generous#she's so fucked up I love her#the locked tomb#gideon the ninth#cytherea the first#cytherea loveday#gideon nav#cythideon#edited to add the picture#because everyone needs to see how much this is them
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The eternal opposing relationship between the two sides of a mirror
or: In defense of Shiori
I feel like Shiori is one of the most controversial characters in Utena. Some love her, others despise her. And I don't have a problem with people having strong opinions on her character. What bothers me is the tendency to exaggerate her most negative traits, focus on her most harmful actions, completely ignore any redeeming qualities she might have and then paint her as a one dimensional villainous caricature, a mean straight girl who plays with the lesbian's feelings for the sake of it, without anything deeper going on.
I'm aware of the fact that some people refer to her like that in endearment or in a satirical fashion, and I'm not saying that you can't consider her your favorite problematic evil girl representation. I'm only trying to make people realize that it's her complexity that actually makes her such a compelling character.
I've seen people call Shiori all sorts of names, some of which were baffling enough to make me wonder if they even remembered what happens in the show, and weren't just judging a version of the character that they made up in their head.
So, let's look at the things Shiori actually does, throughout the course of the story.
Disclaimer: I'm only going to take the series into the account here, because I think we can all agree that everyone's characterization and personality differs at least slightly in the movie. Background characters also get a lot less screen time to explain their motivations in order to fully focus on Anthy's journey and struggles, which is understandable.
1. She "steals" the boy from Juri.
This is her biggest crime, which seems to define her from the very beginning. Even though Juri didn't actually have any romantic feelings for him, this action is detrimental to their relationship - it breaks the trio apart, isolates Juri from the pair, is an act of betrayal against her and proves it was done with full awareness that it would hurt Juri emotionally.
Shiori is a deeply insecure person, who constantly feels inadequate and beneath other people. The only reason why Juri seemed to actually like her that Shiori could think of was pity, and even when she found out she was the object of her romantic affection all along, she still struggled to comprehend it. Her self loathing and constant perceived inferiority make her desperate to gain any sort of control over her life and relationships, but they're also the exact reason she feels that the only way she could ever do that is by hurting others. She's always one step below and incapable of crossing that distance, therefore the only way to become equal to people is to bring them down to her level, by humiliation.
When she "steals" the boy from Juri, she achieves that. For a moment, she feels good about herself and leaves Ohtori thinking that she has found the answer, the solution. But she's wrong. From that moment on, it becomes more and more apparent to her that what she did was never out of love for the boy, even though she doesn't let herself acknowledge it fully. Because the truth is, Shiori actually regrets hurting Juri, which she admits herself during her elevator confession.
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When the guilt starts getting to her, her confidence high wears off, and she ends up feeling ever worse.
That's why she breaks up with him and comes back. She's not ready to leave yet, not ready to progress. There's still something binding her to Ohtori - Juri, and Shiori's unresolved feelings for her.
2. She tries to set things right with Juri and to fix their relationship.
Even though at this point Shiori still thinks that Juri only ever associated herself with her out of pity, she still makes several attempts to get closer to Juri, who understandably (albeit coldly) turns her down ever time. This is a very clear sign of conflicting feelings Shiori has for Juri - jealousy and admiration, resentment and longing, hate and love. After all, Shiori admits that the two practically grew up together. Their friendship may have always felt fake to Shiori, but she clearly cherished it deeply.
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3. The Black Rose Arc.
First of all, we should establish what is the purpose of this arc and how it functions. It explores the motivations of background characters and shows their worst side to the audience. The characters that end up in the elevator are the most unstable, vulnerable ones, with the least power in the system, in unequal and/or exploitive relationships with the duelists and their agency under threat. Mikage offers them a way to gain that power by making them follow their most toxic, negative emotions. And despite all other characters doing exactly that, from what I've seen Shiori is the one that gets the most hate for it. I don't think she should be judged any harsher for what she did under the influence of the black rose than, let's say, Wakaba or Kozue. Especially because the reason all of them ended up in that elevator is because they recognized that these urges were harmful and were seeking help and counseling.
What this arc does do is reveal how Shiori's inferiority complex drives her to act against her own desires. Even though she longs for things to be different, even though she is not happy at all with how her relationship with Juri looks like, she is unable to fix it, because that would require her to consider her own affection for Juri. And she can't do that, because it would mean admitting that she's not stronger than Juri, that she hasn't beaten her, that she's doesn't have control and an advantage over her. Although she tries to keep up this smug, self-assured facade, the reality shines through.
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They key to understanding Shiori is noticing that she specifically doesn't want to acknowledge that Juri's feelings are reciprocated, and the obsession is mutual. If you paint their relationship as one sided, you're actually falling for her act.
4. She enters a relationship with Ruka.
Ruka is a handsome (arguable), respected boy who appears out of nowhere and starts showing interest in Shiori. It's obvious that for an insecure girl, who in addition struggles with confusing repressed feelings, this would be something unthinkably wonderful. The affection and praise she gets from him is exactly what her low self-esteem craves. You might be wondering why she didn't perceive Juri's feelings for her in the same way. And a part of the answer might be that, post nameless-boy-incident, Juri was nothing but cold to her. She might have been pining after Shiori from afar, but in the end she's distant and untouchable, and they're divided by their messy past. Meanwhile Ruka is a clean slate, seems openly affectionate, engaged in their relationship and he pays attention to her. But I think the main thing that makes Ruka so different from Juri is the fact that...he's a boy. Because, as Revolutionary Girl Utena establishes, gender plays a crucial role in interpersonal dynamics. Attention from a boy is fundamentally coded as romantic, desirable, necessary and most importantly: increases the girl's worth in society's eyes. It makes one a princess. Meanwhile Juri's advances could only be seen as an invitation to friendship, at best. But Juri's status and beauty make her special, while Shiori is not. Therefore, it can only be pity and mockery.
Of course, Ruka only uses Shiori to influence Juri and dumps her as soon as he achieves his goals. It's true that Shiori could have listened to Juri's warnings, but then again... why should she? From her perspective, Juri's her ex-friend that doesn't want anything to do with her, who only suddenly comes to Shiori when she's finally happy and fulfilled, and encourages her to end it. She doesn't know the wider context of the situation, nor does she remember the Black Rose arc. Juri's warnings don't sound sincere to her.
And so, Ruka gets rid of her in the coldest, most indifferent way, not explaining anything or showing even the slightest sign of compassion. Before that though, he makes an interesting remark, about Shiori putting on an act and polishing somebody else's sword.
Honestly, I don't really know how to interpret it in any other way than Shiori actually having feelings for someone else, despite trying her hardest to conceal it. Are my shipping lenses not allowing me to see any different possibilities? Am I going crazy? I don't know.
Nevertheless, Shiori begs him to stay, devastated. Her life got turned around so suddenly, she found appreciation, status, comfort and stability, and now all that's been taken away from her as abruptly as it was given. It's a public humiliation.
I once heard someone say that this would be the perfect moment for Juri to step in and defend her. And to be honest, although it may be true, I'm not completely sure. It may have been the one display of open care that Shiori needed from her, but it might as well have been interpreted by Shiori as Juri affirming her superiority over her and feeling sorry for her again. We will never know. In my opinion, so much of their relationship is going on in their own heads that the only thing that could ever cause positive progress is communication (which neither of them seem to be a fan of).
Instead, Juri only tries to console her after the fact, when Shiori's at her absolute lowest. In the context of all the assumptions Shiori holds and Juri's previous indifference, it quite understandably comes off as a sneering attempt to gloat.
That's about it. You may have noticed that I've summarized all Shiori's appearances into 4 points, and only one of them includes an instance of Shiori hurting Juri voluntarily, out of her own free will, not influenced by anyone. I'm not saying that she was forced to taunt Juri during the Black Rose Arc, I'm not trying to diminish the suffering she's caused or trying to paint her as a perfectly good person. I am trying to make it clear that she is not some cunning plotter, dedicating every minute of her life to finding ways to make Juri suffer that some people seem to take her for. I am trying to humanize people's perception of her a little bit. Especially considering the fact that last scenes of her include those when she waits for Juri and follows her so that they can go home together, and then joins the fencing club. If this doesn't show that she's capable of change, I don't know what does.
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She's not an innocent princess, that's true, but she's not just an egoistical, manipulative liar either. She's a bit of both. After all, if Revolutionary Girl Utena is supposed to teach you anything, then I think it's that we're all just people, and the complexities of human experience make it impossible to fit anyone into a box, assigning them definite labels like "princess" or "witch".
And if you look at a teenage girl who, like all people in Ohtori, struggle under the system of patriarchy and heterosexuality, and all you see is a wicked, sinister witch, then you may have just fallen into the trap that the narrative had set for you.
#Shiori: I may be pathetic but you're the one who fell for me lol#no fr you don't need to make up reasons to hate shiori there's plenty enough right there in the text#rgu#revolutionary girl utena#shiori takatsuki#juriori#I guess#she's so fucked up I love her#like girl feeling delighted after finding out your bestie has a crush on you is not very straight no matter how you justify it#moje
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OC-tober Day 11: OC in Formal Clothing!
For the emperors of the Miraki Empire - formal just means 1) all the gold you could want and 2) their true draconic appearances. Ya'Elrah enjoys flaunting both.
OC-tober prompts by @Inked_Wing on twitter
#girlboss girlslay girlmanslaughter!#she's so fucked up i love her#oc#october#october art prompts#october art challenge#october prompts#inktober#yaelrah#ya'elrah
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this song makes me think of Juri too so imma plug her playlist teehee
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watching jessica jones first and foremost kristen ritter is HOT secondly david tennant isn't an actor he's a fucking shapeshifter
#that's not david tennant that's kilgrave and seeing his face makes me want to curl into a ball and scream#god. i fucking hate him oh my god i am filled with pure horror whenever he is onscreen. GUH disgusting gfggffscvdvdvd :(#anyways jessica jones if you are free on thursday i am also free on thursday i am free whenever maam#she's so fucked up i love her#bluebird.txt#this poor little meow meow kills except she doesn't kill but she will fuck you up#jessica jones
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The Dellamortes
#Rook being denied her stupid ass pointy Tevinter mage shoes made her almost leave him at the alter#something something rook you know nothing about fashion leave this to the antivans#but also she would’ve had 0 interest in planning it I know her ass showed up to her own wedding like a modern groom does#just shows up 0 input#the wedding portrait is FINALLYYYY here#when I tell u I redesigned rooks dress 1000 times#I was fighting with making it Tevinter styled because she’s a Mercar rook but then I was like no no she’s marrying into a crow family those#mf’s would GLUE feathers to her if they could#also do love the idea of them both being like do we have to wear white I don’t think anyone is thinkin the god killers r pure pious virgins#of course you have to wear white I SAID SO DAMNIT#dragon age veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age#rookanis#lucanis x rook#datv#rook#lucanis dragon age#rook mercar#rook dragon age#I was tryna keep it ‘humble’ cause chantry but also the antivans….. do not do humble#also I wonder if Rook Mercar saw a woman leading the chant and was like w hat the fuck#cause imperial chantry#also the idea that illario was at the wedding??? I know my rook was PISSSED#also so funny to think lucanis was desperate to leave his own wedding because p arty ugh#I know this is so much yapping but I just have so many feelings about their wedding lol#Vivienne Rook Mercar#well Vivienne Rook DELLAMORTE NOW BOYS AM I RIGHT HAHAHA#I just know lucanis would’ve heard the chantry mother say ‘do you Vivienne take this man’ and he would’ve been like#who the fuck is Vivienne
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It seems there's a new lawyer in town!!!
#I think she's one of the most underutilized characters ever I will DIE on this hill#she can hear people's feelings that is the COOLEST concept ever#you get people who can hear thoughts a lot and that's cool but hearing FEELINGS is such a sick and unique concept#AND SHES A LAWYER#THATS THE COOLEST CAREER YOU COULD GIVE SOMEONE WHO CAN HEAR FEELINGS THAT OPENS DOORS FOR SO MANY GOOD STORIES#I'D LOVE IN AA TO PLAY CASES AS HER WHERE YOU HAVE TO WORK BACKWARDS FROM PEOPLE'S EMOTIONS TO FIGURE OUT MYSTERIES#IT'S A WHOLE NEW SIDE TO THE EVIDENCE#AND SUBTLE HIDDEN FEELINGS KEEP GUIDING HER AND PPL JUST CANT KEEP UP WITH HOW SHE WORKS... STUFF LIKE THAT WOULD BE INTERESTING#WHY ISN'T IT UTILIZED WHY DO WE JUST HAVE PSUEDOSCIENCE MINIGAME#ATHENA IS SO LIKEABLE AND CHARMING AND FULL OF LIFE TOO#PLEASE CAPCOM#I LOV E HER PLEASE#GIVE US A CRAZY MOMENT WHERE SHE TAKES PHOENIX ASIDE HALFWAY THROUGH A CASEAND TELLS HIM HIS CLIENT WAS JUST ELATED AT THE SIGHT OF A CORPS#OR DO IT IN THE GAMEPLAY WHERE THE PLAYER SPOTS IT IN THE MOOD MATRIX#omg yeah actually that'd make me shit my pants that'd be so cool#proper ghost trick moment#THERE'S SO MUCH COOL STUFF YOu can do fuck okay sorry there are so many tags now#can you tell I got feelings abt this character I LOVE HER so much Im in love w her tbh and she's also so me#ace attorney#athena cykes#my art#have a good day thanks for looking at my art haha
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dumb love? i love being stupid
#sonic idw#surge the tenrec#amy rose#surgeamy#surgamy#sth#i caught up on sonic idw while i was away this weekend#and oh my godddddddddddd i am beyond obsessed with surge#she’s so fucking fun. i love her so much. i love her so much that i have to put her in a messy lesbian situationship
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I acknowledge that the season was cut almost in half so I should really cut them some slack but I WON'T, SO:
Plot holes/Forgotten Stuff in TUA:
(some of these are mostly just unanswered questions)
-Sloane?? Where tf did she go?
-Why was Jennifer (in the original timeline) in a cage? In Moldova?? Like, was she discovered to have something ( the dimaldo stuff whatever) inside of her, so they wanted to test on her? if she never came into contact with marigold before ben then why would they? WHAT
-also wait how the fuck did she get that stuff in her anyway? How did the dimaldo get to earth after it caused the end of Reginald's home planet? Like,,,shouldnt we know that?
-Her,,,in a squid??? she was Inside a giant squid? W h a t
-the S3 post credits of ben in the train. sure, whatever, that means nothing LMAOO
-I also can't get over - Five explaining "oh yeah when we do this EVERY ALTERNATE TIMELINE is gonna be destroyed, leaving only what should've been - the original," and lila fighitng to put her family in the train station,,,All the other timelines will be destroyed??They're dying and being reborn/reincarnated in the new one anyway GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING
(unless ive highly misunderstood that which is likely)
-this isnt a plot hole just - five "trying desperately over and over again to save his unhelpful family who he loves very very much" being literally turned into,,,that. did someone say character assassination?
-lila and five. thats a plot hole in and of itself I DONT CARE if he's aged 12 years from season 3, (6 yr timeskip at beginning of season, then 6 technically 7 in teh train), I DONT CARE IF HES 25 NOW, I DONT CARE IF HES MENTALLY 60 SOMETHING. Lila met and spent time with him when he looked like THIS
THATS A CHILD. and clearly, the family had SOME contact in the 6 yr skip, so she WATCHED HIM GROW UP from 13 - 19, like thats just so WEIRD WHAT
this was supposed to be plot holes and just turned into me being pissed im sorry but HOW DO YOU FUCK UP AN ENDING THIS BAD??
#i am genuinely astounded#HOW DO YOU FUCK UP THIS BAD#i miss season 1#klaus you were a standout as ever#so sorry your entire plot was away from the family AGAIN#like EVERY SEASOn#five stans im so sorry#diego deserved so much better#i liked allison more than last season but i cannot forget her SA'ing luther so shes still on my shit list#viktor i will always love you And i am free every saturday at 7#tua#tua season 4#tua s4#the umbrella academy#the umbrella academy season 4
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Nothing in the world belongs to me But my love, mine, all mine
#genshin impact#arlecchino#peruere#clervie#ouhhhhhhhh im never gonna be able to emotionally recover from watching that animated short#ever since it came out a couple days ago just thinking of these two makes me feel like my heart is physically being ripped in half#i cant stop thinking about how Clervie was the only person in Arlecchino's life that she truly loved#like dont get me wrong Arlecchino loves her children in her own detached-fucked up way as much as any person with her amount of trauma can#but Clervie meant so much to her that even just her presence alone kept Arle's curse at bay#and it seems that no one other than Clervie herself has ever been able to break this unemotional/detached wall that Arle has put up#and maybe no one else ever will#DONT GET ME WRONG I still fw arle x other female harbingers like that shit is still peak#but oh my god the idea that arle never moved on after clervie's death and will never love anyone the way she loved her makes me want to SOB
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Dude I can't Luka's expressions in wiege fuck me up so bad all the parallels between Luka now and himself as a child get me so fucking bad like:
The wiege MV (for the mostpart) is about going back to the beginning. It's about the in-betweens we didn't get to see. It's about the journey and it's about all the small moments that built all the characters (most importantly Hyuba and, imo, Mizi) up into what they came to be. For better or for worse, Hyuna and Mizi both grew up so far from what they used to be, went through the whole spectrum of experiences that humans in their position could possibly have, and its shown by the wide range of scenes/experiences/flashbacks they have just how much they've lived.
Meanwhile Luka, who is, objectively, on top of everything, far above what Hyuna, Mizi, and everyone else could've been or ever was, is by far the most stagnant as a person. Where we see Hyuna and Mizi go through all the motions of loving and losing and loving again (and losing again), Luka has always been stuck on Hyuna, and the second he sees her everything he's built up to is all thrown to the wind without a second thought, without any fanfare, because nothing for him as changed.
Internally, Luka's still sitting against that tree in the garden and watching someone else grab his hand, Luka's still watching Hyuna count with his fingers and making him laugh for the first time ever, still clinging to her arm, still crossing the grass field to reach her.
Even years later, even as an adult, he's still looking at her like she's his salvation. When he sees her again on the stage he looks at her like he's just found his way back home after far too many years away from it, and when that gun is pointed at his head to stop him he looks at it like he's wondering why he's not allowed back inside.
And then when he looks at Hyuna more and remembers the moments with her that he's been clinging onto more he forgets about it entirely. And then you know what happens from there. I'm sickkkk
The fact that a lullaby. A Fucking Lullaby, and presumably a song that most if not all kids of Anakt know and learned when they were still young (see: that scene of the main 4 singing it) was the song choice for this video. The fact that seeing Hyuna, just seeing her again like that is what brings that lullaby back, a melody from the beginning of it all that should be so far beneath Luka by now, but isn't. I can't bro.
Luka, live with love. Or whatever. Augh I don't even know
#alnst#alien stage#alnst luka#luka alnst#alien stage luka#alien stage hyuna#alnst hyuna#thank you vivinos i think this is going to fuck me up forever now actually i can't even#i knew it i literally Knew from like the Second i saw this mf that i'd have some shit to say about him#and that time has come#i've been speechless about this damn video for the past like 2 hours man i can't#he. augh.#the way that he ran to her to hug her#and hyuna hugged him back. but only when she was dying only when she was sure he was safe#only to drive home the point when she told him to live with love and forgive himself again and again endlessly#i can't i'm so done vivinos#vivinos when i catch you#idk if any of this made sense well whatever this is my contribution to the alnst doomsday event i guess
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bearer of the curse
#where my unstable girlies at#i realised i drew it mirrored only when i was almost done#its my dumbass habit to flip canvas around all the time so that i forget the original orientation#i love her so much she is such a mentally fucked up blorbo#my art#umineko#umineko spoilers
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Yes i did find the opera delightful.
#ouaw fanart#ouaw#once upon a witchlight#legends of avantris#my art#torbek#morning frost#hootsie grimgrin#i know the tower is innacurate but i drew this first then checked and then decided to ignore it#hope this has a kinda kids book quality of illustration cause that what i was going for#also currently on ep32 and....ugh i might be becoming a twig hater#she's just really annoying and too childish and fucks up everything and its really getting on my nerves#i know this is the goofy silly podcast and i do really like Nikkis dming but god i sooo dislike twig rn#she was so fun at first but rn she's so annoying and i do hate her :(#in better news i loved the play it was very fun#and bavlorna is very intresting
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#polinsated#mygifs*#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#polin spoilers#bridgerton 3x08#colin bridgerton#penelope bridgerton#colin x penelope#polin#polin kiss#polinedit#bridgertonedit#black and white#this was impossible for me personally-to colour so i gave up and made it b&w lol#......#okay.. this scene was strangely short. and it was thrown in so randomly! and i don't understand at all. but#they are so fucking hot#look at her!!#she's so powerful. being on top - being dressed while colin isn't - taking control - pulling him up for a kiss.#i'm in love with her too fuck
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do you ever get so caught up in genuine joy?
#gangle cult#gangle supremacy#the amazing digital circus#gangle tadc#tadc gangle#tadc spoilers#the amazing digital circus spoilers#my video buffered right as she fell I thought she died (before I remembered none of them can uh. do that.)#no but this sequence is so beautiful I WISH I could link music to images#the trumpets- being triumphant?#oh my fucking fuck#ALSO NOTICE THE LIGHTING CHANGE#dim and dark to then the overwhelming light and joy#then so caught up in the joy it hits her. literally.#hits her like a truck...#idk how to caption this but I really love this whole sequence
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