#she’ll understand that i need to prioritize my health and comfort and stuff over school rn

[carcasstohounds]

ok so on one hand, if i leave today or tomorrow i’ll be missing a lot of school because i’ll probably have to miss monday too due to weather. on the other hand, i’ve been sitting in various rooms that are not classrooms since 8am and it is now 9:30 so i’m missing so much class time any way. also, i’d much, much rather feel like shit at home than in various rooms in my school that are not a classroom.

[ope-scuseme]

Dear Kiwi, I guess I'm ok. Maybe one or two breakdowns a day, but mostly less dramatic than before. This was supposed to be the year when everything went ok. The year after the year I got better. But now it seems like the year I'm getting worse again. I just wish I could stay in my room on my laptop forever, away from school and stress and expectations. Birom Ace Anon

Dear Kiwi, I’m probably going to write to you a lot, but here goes: the girl I amy or may not have a weensy little crush on who always goes out of her way to ask who I am usually seems pretty upbeat but recently she’s seemed a little down. I don’t know if I even have a right to worry, since we’re not that close, and no one else seems to worry. My mum is looking into me starting CBT, so good news there. -Birom Ace Anon

hi birom ace anon!! 😄💞 yeah hun keep on writing to me!! i got a little behind here with your asks and it sounds like things are starting to look up ( yes!!!! ) but i’m gonna respond to both for ya anyways 😊 and who knows? maybe someone else thinks your asks are helpful, too ❤️

for your first one, i wasn’t really sure what to say. now that i’ve been out of school for a little bit it’s kind of mind-boggling to me how much stress i was under, especially back in high school. like i look back at all the sleep i lost and all the breakdowns i had over things that aren’t really important to me anymore and i’m like…dude why 😅 lol because i had to, right? but, like…i think most of that stress piled up because i valued other people’s expectations of me more than my own wellbeing. or if you wanna get a little deeper with it, i valued what i thought other people expected of me more than my own wellbeing.

that’s pretty messed up, right? but people don’t really talk about that with you when you’re a student ( mayyybe if you go to a counselor ) and i know i had way too much on my plate to figure it out for myself 😅 and the wildest part of this? it’s totally ok for you to prioritize your wellbeing ❤️ it’s totally, completely ok for you to talk to a counselor and/or your teachers and be like “hey. i’ve got a lot going on in my brain and all this work is just too much for me right now. i know you’re here to help me so please tell me what we can do about this.” they might not understand, but i promise that there’s a much bigger chance that people are gonna want to help you find a solution ❤️

and you know what? it’s totally, completely, absolutely ok that you’re not feeling better as soon as you expected to. i know it’s disappointing and frustrating, and i really really hope that CBT helps 😊💖 but mental and emotional health aren’t always about consistent, constant healing, and there’s absolutely no need to put extra pressure on yourself by expecting them to be ❤️❤️❤️ and if other people are putting that expectation on you? welp they’re wrong 😆

but your plans to start CBT?? THAT’S SO EXCITING OMG!!!! especially because your mom’s helping you with that!!!!! honestly i am so happy to hear about that and i really truly hope it’s a good fit for you 😭💞💗💖

and ooh la la—a crush?? 😉 i’m sorry she seems like she’s feeling down, but you know what? if she always makes that extra effort to ask you how you’re doing, then now’s your time to shine!! you may not be close now, but if you show her that you’re there to listen and support her and maybe cheer her up a little when she’s down, then i bet she’ll want to get closer 😄😄😄 it might take some time, but i say show her you care right on back and see what happens! lol that’s a little bit like what happened with us, right? 😆 and who cares if no one else seems concerned about her—you’re tuned in to her mood because you’re going through your own stuff, right? you empathize with that. and if your gut is saying that something’s off, i say go with your gut. it can’t ever hurt to be a little extra caring 😊💖

well…hope you enjoyed my novel 😂 it honestly brightens my day to hear from you and share what little advice i can! i hope it’s helpful, or even just comforting to read all this stuff ❤️ keep me updated, yo!! i’m invested in this story!! sending you love 💖