#she longs to be precious and loved deeply DEEP enough to penetrate her thick skin deep enough it warms her carefully frozen self

[bbqhooligan]

through all of it, after all of it, ill still be mulling over Bella Swan. unlike other parts of smeyers writing where the glaring issues take the front seat to parts that are well written or interesting, bella remains special to me. genuinely worlds most boring girl, meant to be a mormon self insert but her humanity fleshes out so nicely its hard not to think this is an interesting character who is stuck in a bad premise. i dont know if many fanfics have it in them to do her justice but i be Wondering.

[anythingfanfiction]

Ben Solo, the One and Only

Chapter 1 Chapter 2  Chapter 3 Chapter 4

WARNING: This chapter starts off with very mild smut, has some exposition, then full blown smut and ends with regular storytelling. If you aren’t cool with that, I’ve marked the start of the more intense stuff with three stars (***) and it’ll end with the first line break. There are also a few curse words in the beginning. On another note, (FIC SPOILER ALERT) there will also be some death, it’s not at all graphic, but I thought it should be mentioned just in case. Other than that, there’s not much to it. Happy reading everyone!

Chapter 5

Vivian woke up naked on an empty bed the next morning. Her body felt sore and she took notice of the many love bites and hickeys that bruised her skin. She tried to walk to her dresser but promptly fell to the floor as a result of last nights antics. Will it always be like this? On her second attempt, she used the surrounding furniture as a support system to pick out a silk, thin strapped nightgown and make her way back to the bed. By the time she laid down again, her glorious lover walked into the room and joined her.

“I thought I told you last night not to hide that precious body,” he nagged her, “How are you feeling?” Ben leaned over her to kiss over some of the bruises as he rubbed his hand over her thighs.

“Sore and everything kind of hurts, but I feel good. You made me so feel incredible that it left me wanting more every time,” she told him.

“Is this you asking for round two?”

“Round two? More like round twenty! We started around midnight and finished minutes before sunrise!” she exclaimed.

“Hey, you said it yourself, I had you begging for more - you were asking for it.” he defended himself.

“True,” she admitted, “and I’d be lying to you if I said I wouldn’t want some more right now.” 

He closed the little distance between them with a kiss and she happily complied, bringing her hands to hold his cheeks. Their bodies started to grind against each other and Vivian bit her lower lip to suppress a moan as she felt Ben’s member press close to her entrance. His colossal hands got rid of the thin fabric hiding her equally soft skin and he appreciatively grabbed at her breasts. As she let out a soft moan and arched her back, there was another sound in the room that made both of them lose focus, Ben’s comm device.

He reached over to the nightstand and viewed the caller’s name before breathing out a soft, “Damn.”

Vivian was disappointed by their interruption but took the opportunity sitting on Ben’s lap to softly suck at the nape of his neck. Although he was exceedingly enjoying her actions, his voice came out annoyed as he answered the call, “What the hell do you want Dameron? I’m busy.”

“What do I want? I want you to get your ass over here on base before your mom strangles someone!” Poe responded.

Vivian could also hear the other side of the call and gave Ben a concerned look. She didn’t want him to leave but she also didn’t want him to get trouble when he got home. He gave her a quick, reassuring peck and continued, “I already talked to her, I’ll be there in a few hours.” 

“Man, just finish fucking whatever whore you’re with and get back here.”

Vivian froze. She instantly stopped kissing Ben and her arms went limp. Ben took a look at her eyes, they looked so heartbroken, and he immediately turned red with rage.“Fuck off Poe, you don’t know anything.” he snarled and hung up.

The two sat in silence, neither really knowing how to approach their current situation. Ben stroke Vivian’s hair and pressed a loving kiss on her forehead, “Sweetheart, you’re nowhere near being a-” 

“Ben, how many other women have you been with before me?” Vivian cut him off, not wanting to hear that foul word come out from his lips.

“Let’s not talk about that,” He moved forward to kiss her again but she put her hands on his chest to stop him from proceeding.

“Please, Ben, I want to know,” she pleaded, “I promise I won’t get mad.” 

“Do you want to know how many mattered or how many in total?”

She glared at him.

“Alright fine, fine. Besides you, there’s only been one other girl I’ve been serious with. She was my training partner at my uncle’s camp and we were really close with one another. She was my first,” he confessed, “but then I realized she wasn’t in love with me, not really. She was, however, in love with the idea of me. The handsome, most famous son of the galaxy.”

“Is that why you’re so vague with me sometimes, always quick to avoid telling me who you really are?”

“Yes,” Ben sighed with an anguished expression, “but even though I’ve hidden stuff from you, I’ve always been honest.”

She hummed at this, intently thinking on her next question, “Was she the reason you stopped training with your uncle?”

“No. Well, she’s an unfortunate add on to a list of reasons as to why I left. The biggest reason is that my uncle is a coward; he was worried about the possibility of me switching to the enemy side, even though I gave him no reason to believe that way.”

“I always refused the enemy’s tempting offers and strayed far away from their methods, but my uncle insulted me in saying it wasn’t enough proof for him. At some point in my late teens, I had enough, packed my bags, and went back home. I became a pilot like my dad and inherited his ship.”

It was obvious that he was uncomfortable talking about his uncle, so Vivian changed the conversation back to their original topic, “And the other women you’ve been with? You said they didn’t matter.”

“Not to me. After that first relationship, I learned that people wouldn’t care about who I really was and anyone would use my status to take advantage of me - it made me so angry with everyone. I didn’t start picking up girls until a years after I learned to fly and one of them got me drunk enough to follow her into bed. But those girls were nothing more to me than just a way of blowing off steam, a way of alleviating some of that rage.”

“Listen to me,” he put a finger underneath her chin to make her face him, “last night was better than every other night I’ve spent with any other woman combined. You made the difference, my sweet, sweet Vivian. I love you.”

Vivian had stayed expressionless for most of the conversation, but tears began to trickle from her eyes at his last few words. She wrapped her arms around his neck and tightly embraced him while still naked on his lap. Ben returned the hug and lovingly caressed her back. After a few moments, she moved to look at him and returned the “I love you.” They decided to pick up where they left off before Poe’s call but they were obnoxiously disrupted once more by messages being sent to Ben’s comm device.

“I know that I should head back as soon as possible but I wish I could stay here forever,” he sighed.

“You should probably wash up before leaving though, you kind of look like a mess,” she smiled, giving him a suggestive gaze.

“I blame you. Join me?” he asked and she simply smiled.***

“I can’t stand. I tried to earlier but fell.” Her words roused Ben even more as he took pride in having been the one who made her weak. He gave her a bright grin and lifted her off the bed, wrapping her legs around his waist, “No need for you to stand when you’ve got me, sweetheart.”

Ben carried her into the showering system and she turned it on. Hot water began to pour like rain, soaking their bodies as they sloppily kissed. He held her against the wall and lowered one of his hands closer to her aching entrance. Then, he inserted his thumb, swished it back and forth inside of her. Another finger joined the first and had her mewling in pleasure as he thrust them both at a rapid speed. By the third finger, they could both tell that she was reaching her peak. Although his fingers were thick, they were nowhere near as big as his massive member. They were, however, satisfyingly large enough to make her feel as if she could come at any moment. Which she did - tightening around his fingers and releasing a myriad of fluids onto him.

When he was highly satisfied with his work and brought his hand to his mouth, savoring her taste from each finger. Ben loved seeing her disheveled face as she came down from her high, digging her nails deep into his flesh.

“I’m not done with you yet,” he groaned and spread her legs even further. Vivian slid her hands down his chest and faced upwards to feel the water hit her, loudly gasping as he grabbed his hardened member and deeply penetrate her. From the start, Ben set up a fast pace, eagerly pounding into her, leaving them both out of breath. By then, the glass that encased them had been fogged up from the hot water, making it difficult to see, but it didn’t matter. He was inside her, feeling her, loving her - there was nothing more important to him.

She tugged on his wet hair as a now familiar tension began to grow from the pit of her stomach but she denied it from releasing. Not until he comes, she promised to herself. It was a difficult promise to keep, especially considering that Ben vowed the same in regards to her pleasure. He let out a long, low sounding growl and with a final push, his senses crashed around him and into her. They felt as if they were floating in an endless sea of bliss. In the same position, they rested their heads together, smiling and out of breath.

Ben carried Vivian into the bedroom and dressed her in the same silk nightgown from before. Although they were both opposed to the action, he moved on to finding his clothes from the previous night and getting dressed as well. Vivian watched sadly and laid her back onto the bedframe, wishing he could stay longer. Upon the last button on his shirt, Ben walked to the side of the bed and kissed her lips.

“Rest; I’ll call you by the end of tonight,” he murmured, rubbing his nose against her neck, “I don’t know if I can come again tomorrow; my mom will probably swarm me with work as punishment.” 

“With that in mind, I promise to come back before all these bruises fade away,” he said while pressing the pad of his thumb onto a hickey.

After saying goodbye with a long, sorrowful kiss, Ben left Viktas not looking forward to seeing whatever was in store for him next. 

“Benjamin Organa-Solo!” 

His feet hadn’t even touched the ground when he heard his mother’s voice yell.

“I ought to strip you of your wings and put you on droid duty to teach you a lesson,” Leia clearly wasn’t having it and dragged her son back onto the Falcon to avoid potential spectators.

“Do you not understand the gravity of our situation? We are in a war! I’ve let you play around but I will not allow your games to interfere with your responsibilities - with your duty to this resistance,” she scolded.

“Do you still wish to fight with us?” her eyes looked concerned as if fearing his response.

It was a simple question, really, but it had Ben perplexed. He wasn’t so sure anymore. All his thoughts were focused on Vivian and he had little care for the war. His conscious felt guilty for being so selfish - wanting to ignore the Order’s injustice for the sake of his own happiness, “I do, of course, I do. It’s just that, something changed.” 

“I’ve met someone,” Ben continued, “She’s smart, charming, and so beautiful. And I love her.”

Leia’s entire composure had softened and she sighed, “Do you have any pictures?”

Ben smiled and reached into his jacket to pull out several printed pictures of Vivian and him. While most were from the night before at Vincent’s wedding, others were of Vivian alone that he had taken on some of their dates. As the two sat in silence, his mother thoughtfully scanned through the photographs, taking a particular interest in the eyes of the young couple.

After she examined each picture, Leia spoke to her son, “Although I’m glad you’re in love and grown out of your old habits, I’m still going to punish you for disobeying and lying to me.”

For the next two weeks, Ben wasn’t even allowed to go near the Millenium Falcon, much less fly it. When he finally did get the chance to leave the resistance base, he told Vivian to meet him at the edge of the forest where he always hid the Falcon on Viktas. The second she saw him Vivian hurried to him and pulled on his vest so that they could kiss.

It didn’t take long for Ben to melt into the kiss, wanting to take it a step further. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pushed her up against a nearby tree. The force made her slightly gape her lips open and Ben took it the chance to plunge his tongue into her mouth. Vivian unintentionally moaned, her grip tightening on his clothes as she submitted to his pleasurable gestures. With the other hand entangled with her hair, Ben used it to lean her head back - giving him more access to her neck. Vivian giggled and squealed as he aimed an attack on her collarbone, sucking on it and scraping his teeth across her bare flesh.

“You came right on time, my last mark started to fade this morning,” she informed while pointing to the disappearing bruise on her skin.

“That just means I’ll have to give you some more,” he promised, but contrary to his words, he let go of her and took a few steps back, “But, before I do that, there’s something I want to show you.”

Ben took her hand and led her to the Falcon and the face she made was so priceless, he couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Can I?” she asked.

“By all means,” he let go of her hand and she slowly edged her way onto the ship. Her eyes were wide with awe as her fingers gently traced the mechanical walls. 

“It’s amazing, I’ve never seen anything like it!” she turned to smile and embraced him, “Thank you. So when do we take off?”

“We can’t, Vivian.” he sighed, “It’s too dangerous.”

“That’s not fair! You fly all the time!”

“I know, but that’s me on my own. I don’t want to put you at risk.”

“Please!” she whined, “We don’t even have to pass the atmosphere!” As Vivian said this, she rubbed her hand on his pants, cupping at his groin, and seductively toyed with a few strands of his hair. “Pretty please?”

A groan came out of Ben and he took a quick glance at the control panel, One ride wouldn’t hurt. But then he looked into her bright eyes underneath fluttering lashes. No. Something could happen and it’s not worth her getting hurt. Ben wanted to make her happy but refused her once more, “I’m sorry, Vivian, but not today.”

“Fine,” she let go of her hold on him and sat in the cockpit with a pout, “But you have to promise you’ll take me out flying one day.”

“Of course, sweetheart.”

“You know, I was thinking the other day about how much I love it when you call me sweetheart. But it reminded me that I don’t have a cute pet name for you.”

“Oh?” he chuckled and swooped into the seat beside her, “Why don’t you try some out with me now?”

“Hmmm, Baby,” she started.

“Nah.”

“How about darling?”

“Not feeling it.”

“Honey?”

“Nope.”

She paused for a moment with a contemplative look, she squealed, “Oh! I’ve got it! Benny Bear!”

Gods there’s going to be no escaping from that nickname now.

After Ben gave Vivian a tour of the ship and having some more fun in the cockpit, he walked her home. Just as they neared the apartment building, they ran into Vincent.

"I’m glad I caught you guys, there’s something I’ve been meaning to talk you guys about something.” the latter stated.

“Ben and I were headed upstairs, why don’t we all go-”

“Sorry, maybe I should've been more specific. It’s actually Ben I need to speak with,” he looked at Ben, “You up for a walk?”

“Sure.” Ben leaned down to kiss Vivian goodbye, leaving her embarrassed from doing so in front of her brother. She curiously eyed the two men and soon left them to commence a new conversation.

“You’re probably wondering why I told Vivian to leave.”

Ben groaned internally, expecting to get the overbearing, protective brother speech but was stunned by Vincent next words, “It’s cause I’m sure you’ll want her to hear this from your lips rather than mine. I know who you are, who you really are.”

In a moment of panic, Ben had stopped walking and stared at Vincent wide-eyed. 

“I didn’t like the half-answers she gave me in regards to you and suspected it was because you didn’t give her much to work with, so I hired an informant to find out what you were hiding,” he explained.

“And to think, out of all the people in the galaxy, she’s dating Ben Solo, the wonderboy himself.” Vincent broke out into a laugh and his eyes softened, letting Ben know that he wasn’t angry with him.

“The one and only,” Ben added.

“You’re lucky Vivian trusts you and that Viktas hardly focuses on anything to do with either the Order or the rebellion or she would’ve found out way before you intend.” Vincent continued.

“Listen to me, I can tell that Vivian really likes you, she’s never acted like this with anyone. She’s always pushed people away, focusing on keeping me safe and doing the best she could for us. Ever since you came into the picture, she’s been more conscious of herself; she’s no longer acting for the sake of survival. She’s genuinely happy and it’s because of you.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Ben asked.

“You guys have been together for nearly a year now and I only found out about this the other day. I love my sister and I know she loves you, but I don’t want to see her get hurt. Please, just keep her safe. She’s very selfless and it won’t be difficult to get her involved, so if she does, make sure you protect her.”

With confident and determined air, Ben patted Vincent’s back, “You can count on that.”

“I’ve decided to keep this from her but you should probably tell her sooner than later,” Vincent suggested.

“Yeah, I probably should.”

And they left it at that.

Back on the unsuspecting moon in which the resistance base was hidden, Ben and his mother made an agreement in which he could visit Vivian at least once every week, so long as it didn’t meddle with his responsibilities. The two, along with Han, were currently sharing dinner together for the first time in what seemed like forever. With their equally busy and complicated schedules, ‘family time’ was more difficult to arrange than a mission to defend foreign planets.

“Tell me, Ben, how’s your little girlfriend?” his father questioned, “When do we get to meet her?”

“Well actually-” Ben was cut off by his comms device; Vivian was calling him, ”Speaking of the galaxy’s cutest medic” 

He answered the call, “Hey, sweetheart. I was just-”

A sob. It was the most dreadful sound Ben had ever heard and he completely froze. Vivian, his Vivian, was crying.

“Ben,” she sniffed, “Something’s happened.”

“Vivian what’s wrong?” Ben had already got up from his seat and picking up his jacket.

All her attempts at sentences only came out as incoherent sounds but she eventually muttered out the situation, “They’re dead. Vincent and Cecilia are dead.”

A/N: Sorry it took so long to post this but I hope it's enough and that you guys could enjoy it! Credit to the space line divider break is here if you were wondering! I’ll be on a trip for the next 10 days so I probably won’t be able to post anything, but I will try to get some writting done during flights or waiting time. As always, please let me know if you liked this by giving the post notes, commenting, or send me a message!