#she got adopted after the family's divorce arc was finished | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

satonthelotuspier · 5 years ago

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Fur and Feathers

Part 3 of the XiCheng story arc. I’ll no doubt write more of them in future for extras etc but this is the main part of their story finished.

Part 1 and Part 2 can be found at the links.

After 2 years of avoiding his responsibilities it’s time for Jiang Cheng to return to Lotus Pier, and the political husband he walked out on the day after their marriage.

Once back the two settle down to ignoring each other wherever possible, until a misfired talisman created by not-so-genius brother Wei Wuxian causes them to have to forget their differences and co-operate from close quarters for a while.

7k words

XiCheng Part 3

“Isn’t it about time you went home to your husband, Jiang-gongzi?” Nie Mingjue asked pointedly at dinner that evening.

Nie Huaisang coughed once to hide his amusement and pulled out his fan, opening and covering his face with it. He had pre-warned Jiang Cheng to expect something like this, apparently his brother hadn’t bothered to hide his displeasure at Jiang Cheng’s return from Huaisang.

And really, Jiang Cheng thought that he had likely pushed his absence as far as he could. His mother would probably have him beaten with the discipline whip when he arrived back at Lotus Pier. He had chosen to ignore letter after letter from her demanding his immediate return over the past two years. The longer he had left it the harder the thought of returning had become; distance and a level of maturity had allowed him to admit what an absolute bastard he had been to his new husband. He had walked away from Lotus Pier the very day after their political marriage had been enacted, leaving the other alone and adrift in a new clan, ripped away from everything he’d known.

He knew Lan Xichen had been as much of a pawn as he had in the union; perhaps more so, having offered himself in the place of his brother to ensure Lan Wangji, who had been in love with Wei Wuxian for many years, had the chance at happiness Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng were to be denied. Yet Jiang Cheng had still acted out on his childish humiliation, wanting to hurt the other as much as he had been hurt. He had probably more than achieved his wish.

Jiang Cheng had spent the last two years at Qinghe with Nie Huaisang, and visiting Jiang Yanli, his elder sister, in her new home at Lanling with the Jin clan.

She had gently scolded him about his terrible behaviour, but as ever she wouldn’t push him on the matter. He had also spent a year night hunting with a pair of rogue cultivators he had met on his travels; the two owl shifters had been investigating a troublesome ghost haunting in a beleaguered village at the same time Jiang Cheng had happened upon it as he’d been making his way home.

They had cooperated, and Jiang Cheng had been invited to travel with them. And he hadn’t taken much convincing, anything to put off the inevitable for a little longer. Eventually they had parted ways, however, and this stop off in Qinghe was his last before he genuinely did return to Lotus Pier to face his mother and his husband.

“You’re correct Nie-zongzhu, I will be leaving for Lotus Pier at the end of the week” he agreed, and at his agreement Nie Mingjue could say no more.

***

The night before his departure Nie Huaisang joined him in his rooms.

“So, what are you going to do about your trophy husband when you return home?” Nie Huaisang asked him lazily from where he laid on Jiang Cheng’s bed. Nie Huaisang’s version of helping was being present to offer guidance and moral support.

His mouth pulled tight at Lan Xichen being described as his trophy husband. Sadly, that was likely the extent of how Madam Yu saw him; a coup for Yunmeng Jiang to have had the former heir of the Gusu Lan clan and foremost cultivator of his generation, marry into it. The thought left a sour taste in his mouth, for he had equally played his part in the Jiang clan treating this well-bred gentleman cultivator like a thing to be used and ignored.

“How do you mean?” Jiang Cheng asked eventually, not quite understanding the question.

“Are you going to attempt a reconciliation? Divorce?” he prompted.

“We can’t divorce, that would defeat the purpose of the marriage in the first place. Much as Lan Xichen, or either of us, might wish to. And how could I possibly attempt a reconciliation? Would you forgive me or my clan in his place?”

Nie Huaisang hmm’ed his agreement, before a devilish look came across his face, “Or you could seduce him, once he’s under your sexual spell he might”

“My sexual spell” Jiang Cheng repeated flatly, trying to ignore the fact the thought of Lan Xichen in that way made his neck heat up in embarrassment. “Look, we’ll probably just get on with it like my parents. We don’t have to like each other to be married. It was about the politics” the thought of such a marriage, stretched out in front of him was a lead weight in his chest, however.

“How romantic, what a life to look forward to, being just like your parents”

“I don’t exactly have much choice” Jiang Cheng snapped, then rolled his shoulders in irritation, “we’ll be fine, at least there won’t be any children for us to ruin”

“Or you could try to get on with him, its a novel idea, I know”

But Jiang Cheng was finished discussing the subject.

***

His mother was the expected level of incensed with him when Jiang Cheng did arrive back at Lotus Pier. Salvation came from an unexpected source, however, and Lan Xichen moved in to greet him after her initial sally. He was drawn away with various comments on his tiredness due to travelling, welcomes home, and queries after his health.

He was about to thank the other but Wei Wuxian had found them, and Lan Xichen took his arrival as opportunity to leave, and turned on his heel and walked away.

Jiang Cheng felt the cut, but he wasn’t sure if Lan Xichen had intended it deliberately.

He had little time to dwell on it, as Wei Wuxian trailed him to his rooms, where he dropped his pack and sank onto the bed in relief.

It was short lived, however, as Wei Wuxian took up where Madam Yu had left off in admonishing him for being gone so long. He added being so horrible to Lan Xichen to his list which hadn’t been a concern of hers, but was just as fluent in his censure.

Wei Wuxian didn’t have access to the discipline whip, or Zidian, though, and Jiang Cheng knew how to wrap Wei Wuxian around his little finger.

He got up and moved to his brother, sliding under his arm and into a hug; he rubbed his cheek against Wei Wuxian’s, scenting him as family. It was as effective as he had expected, and Wei Wuxian wrapped him up tightly in a reciprocal embrace.

“We’ve been worried about you, you little shit” he accused, “If Nie Huaisang and Shijie hadn’t written we’d have had no idea where you even were for the past few years. You’re lucky I can’t use Zidian, or your mother would be the least of your worries” he accused, rubbing Jiang Cheng’s back which took a lot of the sting out of his threats.

And Jiang Cheng hadn’t realised how much he’d missed his adopted sibling; the strong purr that rumbled in his chest in response to the contact surprised him. He rubbed his cheek once more against Wei Wuxian’s then gave in to his animal form and allowed it to take over.

Jiang Cheng was a sleek black cat weaving around Wei Wuxian’s ankles before the other could blink.

He was scooped up and set on Wei Wuxian’s lap as the other sat on his bed.

He continued to stroke Jiang Cheng’s back and Jiang Cheng continued to purr as Wei Wuxian kept up his stream of scolding for a long while.

***

A week later, as he sat over dinner with his family, he wondered whether his father or he had done worse in the arranged marriage stakes.

Yes, Madam Yu was a fiery, tempestuous woman, much like Jiang Cheng in temperament, but was her rough tongue really worse than the faultless politeness Lan Xichen treated him with when they were forced to interact? At least with his mother her venom made it clear exactly where you stood.

To make matters worse Wei Wuxian’s relationship with Lan Wangji seemed to have progressed some too. Of itself that wasn’t a problem; he was happy for his brother, the problem was his brother-in-law, who took the faultless politeness of Lan Xichen and added a severe coating of ice to it. Politeness could impale when Lan Wangji wielded it.

He was not a popular in-law, it seemed.

It was nothing he didn’t deserve, however, and he didn’t feel it was an unfair reaction. He very much thought if the tables had been reversed and it was Wei Wuxian who was in the same situation as Lan Xichen he would hiss and spit in defence of his brother, as Lan Wangji did in his own way.

Jiang Cheng was also happy to bear the censure when he saw the look in Wei Wuxian’s eyes, that soft, dawning love every time he looked at Lan Wangji. Perhaps he had finally begun to realise that the “friendship” between he and Lan Wangji had the potential to be much more, especially if the new Lan sect heir had his way.

He paused briefly as the implications sank in. Lan Wangji would no doubt ask Wei Wuxian to marry him when the time was right, and it appeared Wei Wuxian would agree. Then Wei Wuxian would follow the other back to Gusu, marry into the Lan clan, and live happily ever after.

And Jiang Cheng would be left in Yunmeng, without his siblings.

He would be alone. He would have no one left to mark, to curl into the lap of when he wanted to be a pampered cat, no one to tease and be teased by.

All that was in front of him was years at the mercy of his mother’s disappointment and his father’s indifference.

The thought made him feel ill.

It was no reason to wish his siblings anything but their happiness, however; his life was his to bear, alone if need be.

His stomach roiled at the thought of eating another bite, and he placed his chopsticks down on the table, excusing himself.

***

Jiang Cheng woke up in the night. It was still pitch dark outside and there was barely any light as it was the last sliver of a waning moon that hung in the sky.

Had his feeling of illness at dinner been an omen of an onset of fever? His body felt unusually warm, and there was a tingling painfulness at the nape of his neck. He felt restless, with a vague sense of wrongness. Jiang Cheng sat up in bed, brushing the heaviness of sweat soaked hair away from his nape, trying not to think too much on how his body just didn’t seem to move like he was used to.

And now he looked around, the window wasn’t in the correct position in relation to his bed, and the carafe of water he normally kept on a table by his bedhead was nowhere to be seen.

This must be a dream. He had a fever, and he was undergoing one of those strange dreams where his body didn’t seem to belong to him and he imagined things were different to what they were.

It must be.

He lay back down and tried to go back to sleep but his brain wouldn’t stop working, turning over and over how wrong everything was.

Eventually he gave up, sat up and sent a small amount of qi out to light the nearby lamp. It nearly exploded; he was pretty sure he had made the same gesture a hundred times before without that happening.

Soft flame-light illuminated a room that was very definitely not his, and as he stubbed a toe on the bed frame as he moved to pick up the lamp he cursed in a voice that was absolutely not his.

Something was very definitely wrong and this was not a dream.

He moved quickly over to the mirror and found out why everything had felt so wrong as Lan Xichen’s face looked back at him, Jiang Cheng’s intense shock and surprise forming the jade-like features into a stronger emotion than Jiang Cheng had ever seen grace them before.

He dashed out of the doorway and after a brief moment of confusion, while he recalibrated his mind to the fact it wasn’t his rooms he had just left, set off to Wei Wuxian’s accommodations.

He barged in with the most perfunctory knock, which had Wei Wuxian waking in surprise. He sat up and shook his head as if to clear the sleep from it, “Xichen-ge?” he questioned in confusion.

“Wei Wuxian!” Jiang Cheng dashed over to his bed, sitting on the side and grabbing Wei Wuxian’s forearms, “Something’s wrong. I don’t know how this happened”

“Is it Lan Zhan? Is he alright?” he threw the blankets back and got up, searching for his boots.

“What? Why would it be Lan Wangji?”

“You said something was wrong, are you feeling well, Xichen-ge?”

“Of course I’m not feeling well, you stupid weasel…”

“Jiang Cheng?” Wei Wuxian frowned in confusion, but there was only one person in the world who mocked him with the term weasel, meant to be derogatory to his sable animal form. Even if there was a second person, Lan Xichen would not be he.

“Yes! I don’t know what happened, Wei Wuxian, I woke up a while ago and I was in Lan Xichen’s body. What do I do?”

Although the room was lowly lit Jiang Cheng saw Wei Wuxian blanch; a guilty look crossed his face, and Jiang Cheng would have felt his temper flare normally. He was merely a little cross.

“What did you do Wei Wuxian?” he asked getting up too, taking hold of Wei Wuxian’s shoulders.

“Xiongzhang!” Lan Wangji’s voice sounded from the doorway, and they both looked across to see the Second Jade of Lan stood just inside Wei Wuxian’s room with a look quite close to actual surprise.

“Lan Zhan!” Wei Wuxian called, “This isn’t what it looks like”

And it really wasn’t.

“Wangji” An odd thrill passed through Jiang Cheng’s current body at the sound of that tone; he put it down to the oddness of hearing his own voice speak words he hadn’t formed.

“I think you had better explain what you’ve done, Wei Wuxian” Jiang Cheng said calmly, and Lan Xichen, in Jiang Cheng’s body, marched over to stand close by too.

“Yes, what have you done, Wei Wuxian?” it sounded tight and angry, and Lan Xichen’s face pulled up into an expression of shock, a hand flying up to cover his mouth.

Jiang Cheng met his wide-eyed gaze with amusement.

“Do you always feel like this?” there was disbelief in Lan Xichen’s tone.

“Fun, isn’t it?” Jiang Cheng asked facetiously.

“Not in any way. Explain, please Wei-gongzi” Lan Xichen pushed Wei Wuxian for an answer again.

“Alright, so this is probably my fault” Wei Wuxian began.

“How probably?” Jiang Cheng asked, moving away to stand at the window.

“Likely mostly” Wei Wuxian admitted, and held his hands out helplessly, “It’s like this, and really it could have happened to anyone, I designed a talisman that I used tonight”

Jiang Cheng felt a sinking feeling in his stomach.

“Wei Wuxian”

“It was meant to swap mine and Lan Zhan’s animal forms for a while”

“Wei Ying!” Lan Wangji exclaimed in surprise.

“What, Lan Zhan? I wanted to be a cute and soft bunji, you’re always saying I don’t understand how unsettling being around one of your natural predators is, so I thought if we swapped for a while it would help me, and you could be a handsome sleek sable with a beautiful coat, as an added bonus. So really, if you look at it that way, it’s actually your fault, Lan Zhan”

Jiang Cheng raised a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose in exasperation, except it wasn’t his nose, and it was the oddest feeling to have something that intuitive feel wrong.

“So you can just design the reversing talisman?” Jiang Cheng asked him, “and we’ll be back to normal tomorrow?”

“I could try” Wei Wuxian said tentatively, “But it’s probably safer just to let it wear off naturally at this stage” he said, “It should only last a week or two”

“I don’t think I’d last two weeks, Wei Wuxian” Jiang Cheng complained.

Lan Xichen added a soft “Quite” to the argument.

Wei Wuxian shrugged, “I might end up swapping your animal forms but leaving you both in the wrong body, I think it safer to not interfere. Look at it like an adventure. A chance to see how the other half live, quite literally” he clapped his hands together and rubbed them together, “Now that’s settled, I’m tired, could you all please go and entertain yourselves somewhere else?” he made a shooing motion.

Jiang Cheng called after Lan Xichen, “If you do end up in cat form just don’t lick...things, honestly if I find out you did, I’ll break your legs” he meant to make it sarcastic and cutting, but it was more like a suggestion when it was passed through Lan Xichen’s vocal chords and emotional centre.

“Think yourself lucky if they’re all still attached when you get this body back” was the cutting response, followed by another hand over mouth look of shock.

The Lans left, but Jiang Cheng paused as the hot tingling pain made itself known again. He could ask Lan Xichen about it directly, but he was loath to talk to him about it.

He pulled the hair off of his nape, and asked Wei Wuxian, “What is that? It burns and tingles constantly”

He heard the swift intake of breath, then Wei Wuxian’s voice, unusually sharp when talking to him.

“Are you being facetious, Jiang Cheng? It’s not very funny”

Jiang Cheng was surprised, “What? No, of course not, Wei Wuxian, tell me what it is”

“It’s a bond bite, please don’t tell me you’re stupid enough to have bitten Xichen-ge and forgotten. I won’t for a second believe it was from anyone else, Xichen wouldn’t be unfaithful”

But at the initial identification of the source of his discomfort Jiang Cheng had gone cold, had he?

“Did you let him bite you back? Please tell me that you weren’t that much of a shit to mark him and not let him reciprocate, and then leave him for two years”

“I didn’t mark him!” Jiang Cheng denied helplessly.

“It’s an impossibility that you didn’t because I can see the damn thing, Jiang Cheng”

Jiang Cheng thought back to that single night they had shared. Lan Xichen had claimed virginity and an unwillingness to be the one to do the taking lest he hurt the other, therefore Jiang Cheng had done so.

He cursed as it all became clear on carefully considering their wedding night, although he hadn’t intended to mark Lan Xichen the base instincts of his cat had made him bite the other at the scruff of the neck to hold him down while they mated.

“Fuck” he dropped his face into his hands; he really had been that much of a shit, although it had been unintentionally.

“Jiang Cheng”

“I know. I actually do have a conscience Wei Wuxian. I’ll make him mark me tomorrow” he promised; a reciprocated bond mark would stop the burning itching tingle. “Wait, I’ll mark him…me…” this was so confusing, honestly, sometimes Wei Wuxian’s insane shenanigans got so old. “Do you think you can avoid making any more stupid talismans before tomorrow?” he asked, finally managing to get a little sarcasm out of Lan Xichen’s mouth.

“Not sure, do you think you can avoid biting anyone else until tomorrow?” Wei Wuxian demanded in response, and it neatly shut him up.

He wanted to stalk out, but the First Jade moved far too gracefully to enable a good stalk, and he merely glided out of Wei Wuxian’s rooms instead.

***

They sat across from each other in Jiang Cheng’s rooms the next morning, a tea set between them. It was probably the longest they had spent in each other’s company when it had been just the two of them since...well, since their wedding night.

Lan Xichen had done his best over the past week or so of Jiang Cheng’s return to avoid being alone with him, and Jiang Cheng hadn’t wanted to push him into something that he obviously wanted to avoid.

No wonder, when he thought Jiang Cheng was such a cad that he would bond bite him then walk away for two years. The latter was bad enough on it’s own. Whatever Lan Xichen’s feelings were towards Jiang Cheng at this stage of their relationship he more than deserved them.

“Wei Wuxian wants us to wait until the talisman wears off, how do you feel about that?”

“Amazing, you worry about how I feel now, when it affects your body!” came the retort, again accompanied by a surprised look as Jiang Cheng’s emotional centre made his response for him.

“Honestly Xichen, you’ll have to stop wearing that expression every time you’re mouthy, it’s going to happen a lot over the next few weeks”

Really, being the one sat on the receiving end, Jiang Cheng could only wonder at how more people hadn’t punched him in the mouth in the past.

“How do you even live like this? How can you be so angry all the time and not just feel so weary of it” Lan Xichen wondered, reaching for his cup.

“I’m a hardy soul” Jiang Cheng shrugged. Really he was occasionally weary of it. But he had gotten better over the years at holding his temper, Lan Xichen, with his much calmer personality, didn’t have Jiang Cheng’s years of practice at binding that quicksilver response.

“We’ll have to bear it” Lan Xichen returned to Jiang Cheng’s original question.

“Do you want to be honest with everyone, or do we try to hide it?”

“Will Wei Wuxian get in trouble?”

“Probably a little. My mother isn’t particularly tolerant of him”

“Your mother isn’t tolerant of anyone” Lan Xichen did cover his mouth with his hand then; and he bowed to Jiang Cheng, “I’m deeply sorry that I disrespected your mother”

Jiang Cheng nodded his head in acceptance of the apology, although he hadn’t said anything that was untrue it was of course deeply disrespectful to comment on his mother-in-law’s short comings.

“We should probably try to hide it then, to save Wei-gongzi from possible punishment”

Jiang Cheng was glad the other agreed with the choice he had wanted to make; but he wouldn’t have forced the issue if Lan Xichen had decided against it. He nodded his agreement. That was issue number one dealt with.

Issue number two was going to be much harder for him to discuss, but he was an adult, and he would deal with things, even if they made him uncomfortable. He had grown up over the past years.

“Xichen, I want you to know I didn’t mark you on purpose, then leave” Jiang Cheng decided the best way to apologise would be directly, “I’m not making excuses, what I did was a horrible thing. But it was instinct, and not malice. I’m truly sorry”

“Nice, you merely emasculated me accidentally, good to know, Wanyin, thank you”

He hadn’t expected to get away with it too easily, especially not when the other was armed with Jiang Cheng’s naturally smart mouth.

“We should make a reciprocal mark”

Lan Xichen, in Jiang Cheng’s body, looked at him in surprise, “Oh”

Jiang Cheng, in Lan Xichen’s body, looked back at him in confusion, “I didn’t do it maliciously, of course I’m going to make it right”

“But aren’t you…” he made an elegant but vague gesture with his hand that was pure Lan, “...with Nie Huaisang?”

It took exactly thirty seconds for his meaning to permeate through Jiang Cheng’s borrowed brain.

“What? No!” had Lan Xichen really thought he had been off sleeping with another man for the last two years? “How could I do that? We’re married. I haven’t...not since before the betrothal”

“Oh” that noise again.

Honestly, there was no wonder Lan Xichen hated him; he’d feel exactly the same if he thought the man he had been joined in marriage to had put a bond mark on him, effectively marking him as belonging to the other, then gone on a two year jaunt of debauchery and sexual excess.

“I spent some time at Qinghe as Nie Huaisang’s friend, but I went to Lanling too, and I spent a year night hunting with a pair of rogue cultivators I met while travelling. A snowy owl and a great grey owl. They were good people. A little odd, like most bird shifters, but good”

Honestly there was a long-held-true notion in the shifter world that people with bird forms were the most likely to just forsake the human world and give in entirely to their animals. There were many anecdotal tales of bird shifters just vanishing forever. Sometimes Jiang Cheng wondered if it wasn’t because they had the ability to just fly away if their lives weren’t what they wanted, and maybe start again many hundreds of miles away, but some said the pleasure and freedom of being a bird was too seductive, that when their human life was hard, it was too easy a decision to just forsake it.

He noticed the unnatural amount of iron in the other’s spine then, and rethought what he’d said.

A comment about bird shifters.

Damn.

Did he even know what animal Lan Xichen was? It would have all been part of the betrothal documents and wedding licences, but he had been in such a snit at the time he had paid no attention to any of their wedding preparations.

“I like birds” he tried, and as damage control, it was absolutely stupid. But for some reason Lan Xichen found it amusing, and he started to laugh. He seemed as much surprised by that response as Jiang Cheng was, but didn’t seem to be able to stop.

Eventually, holding his stomach, his amusement was spent, and Jiang Cheng wondered if his husband had ever laughed so much before. The Two Jades had always seemed too stately, statue-like, and disconnected from the world for that kind of response. They both had untouchable auras, surrounding melancholy, saturnine dispositions.

Although Lan Xichen had always seemed mildly amused at the world, in that detached Lan way, and Lan Wangji had always seemed disgusted with it.

He felt that soft stirring of compassion for his husband, one he had buried under layers of anger and hurt and childish reprisals many years ago.

He doubted either of the Lans had spent an afternoon yelling and laughing and wrestling in water with their peers, just because it was hot outside and there was nothing more soothing than a dip in the lotus lake to be had.

“I know, Wanyin, but you like to eat them, I can feel your cat’s interest stirring when I look at you, in my body. I fear my bird might be a little too much for your cat to take on though”

Jiang Cheng had never yet found a bird his cat didn’t think he was equal to; false pride was also a failing of cats. His cat was more cunning than most, thanks to his human intelligence, but really anything from a crow and up would leave him pecked to pieces for his hubris, that was something the human Jiang Cheng understood, even if it made his cat sit and swish his tail in irritation.

Jiang Cheng suddenly realised that the feeling he had of being trapped, of being bound, wasn’t him being uncomfortable in Lan Xichen’s body, it was Lan Xichen’s animal that wanted to be on the wing.

“How much is too much?” he asked out of interest, as he ran the fingers of one hand up and down the opposite arm in a soothing stroke.

“Around two and a third chi of raptor, perhaps?”

Jiang Cheng gulped on behalf of his cat, who was definitely outmatched. Lan Xichen was talking in the realms of the biggest birds of prey. He held a silent memorial for his cat’s self-respect.

“I’m a mountain hawk-eagle. Once we’ve exchanged the bite, perhaps we should try and get comfortable with each other’s animal forms? I don’t think my eagle will like being denied for so long as two weeks without being allowed to fly”

The suggestion was a good one, honestly his cat wouldn’t want to spend two weeks without a warm lap to nap on either, now he had returned to the bosom of his family.

He scooted around the table unthinkingly, before pulling the collars of his robes out of the way, at Lan Xichen’s nonplussed look he realised he’d become confused again.

“Oh, of course, it’s the other way around isn’t it?” this was so stupidly confusing. Wei Wuxian had a lot to answer for. Although he had managed to bring about Lan Xichen being willing to be in Jiang Cheng’s company for longer than it took to offer a polite greeting and move on, so there was something.

“It does seem rather unfair that I’m the one getting bitten again, doesn’t it?” Lan Xichen asked with a touch of sarcasm in his voice, and Jiang Cheng pulled away again.

“We don’t have to, we can leave it until after the talisman has worn off if you’d like; then you can be the biter. I promise this isn’t just because it’s inconvenient to me, I’ll still let you bite me when I’m back in my body” he swore.

“I know, Wanyin, I was just being a brat, as you may be familiar with. Please continue” he bared the long line of Jiang Cheng’s neck to him, “I don’t know where you’d like the mark to be”

It was a little disconcerting to actually be biting his own throat; honestly it was a blessing they didn’t have a sexual relationship, or Jiang Cheng would be putting that firmly on hold until after the talisman wore off; surely only the biggest narcissist in the world would find the thought of sleeping with themselves anything but an utter turn-off.

It was only when the First Jade snorted in amusement (actually snorted! Please tell him that wasn’t something he did!) that he realised he’d mused on the subject out loud.

“You’re quite correct” Lan Xichen agreed with a small smile.

To cover his sudden embarrassment he leaned in, and with a, “I’m sorry if this stings” sank his teeth into the bare skin at the join of shoulder and neck, until he tasted the metallic tang of blood on his tongue.

***

Later, after the reciprocal bond bite had been made, and cleaned up, they made their way out of Lotus Pier to safely let the other’s animal have free reign.

The burning, scraping feeling at the nape of Jiang Cheng’s neck had faded almost as soon as the bite had been made, and Jiang Cheng was glad it was something less Lan Xichen would have to bear when they returned to their own bodies.

They found a clearing in the woods.

“I would think much of the process of flying would be natural, same for your cat, perhaps we’ll be fine if we don’t overthink it too much” Lan Xichen murmured, and it made sense.

“Would you like to go first?” Jiang Cheng invited, and Lan Xichen looked at him in confusion.

“Can’t we try at the same time? Do you think my eagle will attack your cat?”

“No” Jiang Cheng chuckled, “Honestly, you wild animals have no idea what it’s like to be a domestic shifter. Do you know how much attention a domestic cat requires?”

“Very little? I thought cats were self-sufficient, and standoffish”

“Yes, but also very needy and with a want to be babied”

“Cats make no sense” Lan Xichen complained, then eyed the other as realisation struck. “So basically, that’s the riddle of Wanyin, you literally encapsulate every trait of a cat”

Jiang Cheng couldn’t even be annoyed at the parallel Lan Xichen had drawn, because he literally was a cat in his human form too.

He shrugged, “It is what it is” he stepped back to give the other space, and he switched forms, that triumphant look still on his face until he changed into a sleek, black cat.

His first action was to lower his head and groom nervously at his left shoulder, right over where the mating mark had gone, then he stretched luxuriously, each claw on his front paws fully extended. And then he went to explore the undergrowth.

Jiang Cheng did a quick visual check to ensure there wasn’t anything poisonous to cats that Lan Xichen might not realise was dangerous, before he sat down in the shade of a tree and waited for Lan Xichen to return.

That feeling of restlessness still plagued him with freedom in sight, but he would make sure Lan Xichen was fine before he gave in to the need.

He was dozing in the warmth of the day when he felt the tentative touch of paws against his thigh.

“Come here” he murmured groggily, knowing what Lan Xichen, or rather the cat Lan Xichen was currently inhabiting, needed.

Invited, the other climbed into his lap and formed a cat loaf, while Jiang Cheng found all the secret spots that he loved to be fussed in, causing the black-furred predator in his lap to rumble in contentment.

Once he had received his full allotment of attention, Lan Xichen got up, stretched again, and went hunting a butterfly he saw fluttering through the grasses. There was no way with that clumsy hunting technique he would offer it any serious concern though, Jiang Cheng realised, grinning.

He took the opportunity to stretch himself, then shimmered into Lan Xichen’s animal form.

It was odd. Their animal’s were both predators, but they couldn’t be more different from each other.

“Wanyin” his head tilted to show he heard the other, who had changed back into Jiang Cheng’s human form. “Be careful, I don’t think you’ll understand how addictive flying can be until you experience it, but don’t go too far, not just yet. Make sure you stay in sight of the clearing, and test your stamina. Having tested your cat form I’d say a lot of the instincts are there, but they’re not necessarily as intuitive as I’d expected. A lot of flying, especially for raptors, is using the air currents, and none of your own actual energy, try that out. And please be careful, Wanyin, there wasn’t too much damage I could do from the ground, but if you make a mistake at that height you won’t be walking away from it” he reached out a hand towards Jiang Cheng, who nipped gently at his fingers with his sharp, hooked beak, to show he understood, and that seemed to settle Lan Xichen a little.

With several strong flaps of his wings he pulled off the ground and up into the air.

It was very intense activity, no wonder birds had to find a way to make it less energetic to avoid becoming exhausted quickly, at this rate he’d not make it above the treetops. He made it to the canopy, and found a perch high up. He wanted to try a glide, which he could do across the clearing from here; it went better than expected, and he thought he might be beginning to understand what Lan Xichen meant by using the air currents rather than his own energy.

Next he flew out of the clearing, and higher into the air. He new raptors hung at ridiculous heights to hunt their prey with their sharp vision and as he gained more of that height, then settled into the air currents he genuinely understood what Lan Xichen had meant about becoming addicted.

This feeling of freedom, the world stretched out beneath his wings, endless, yet small and unimportant, it was amazing.

He understood fully about those bird shifters who gave up on the world; how could you give this feeling up if what waited for you on the ground was nothing but pain and disappointment?

Unfortunately, he was awaited by a worried husband, and he didn’t want to worry Lan Xichen any more than he had to, so after a short while he folded his wings and practised losing altitude via deep swoops. There was one moment of instinct almost taking over, when he caught the movement of a small hare in a meadow, but he managed to redirect his own attention, and eventually rejoined Lan Xichen in the clearing.

He changed back and dropped out of the low branch, and the feeling of disappointment was a tangible thing.

He now understood why bird shifters were often thought odd, or melancholy, how could they be anything else in human form when they knew the feeling of flight?

He had flown on swords for most of his life and it didn’t even come near to the experience of the wind beneath stretched, powerful wings.

He wanted to ask Lan Xichen how he could ever bear to be in human form, but knew the question would spark pain. How could it not?

“How did you do?” Lan Xichen asked him tentatively, and Jiang Cheng nodded.

“I think I was starting to get the idea. A poor hare almost became dinner, though” he admitted.

***

The next several days were tiring. They spent much of them in each other’s company, they escaped to allow their animal’s freedom as often as they could, and avoided company other than Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian when possible. When it wasn’t, they pretended to be each other. They both had quite a good grasp of the other’s personality by now, and it wasn’t too hard to replicate it, there were only one or two moments where it was a close call; they came mostly when Madam Yu began to berate Lan Xichen, in Jiang Cheng’s body, where he often felt the need to leap to Jiang Cheng’s defence, whereas Jiang Cheng would never have dared talk back to his mother on his own behalf.

They spent most night’s sleeping in the same room, with Lan Xichen taking cat form to take advantage of the opportunity for fusses; and after all, there wasn’t anything scandalous in husbands sleeping in the same room.

As the time for the talisman to wear off came closer Jiang Cheng, whilst looking forward to things physically going back to normal, was sad at the thought of what he would lose.

There was the amazing, soul-altering feeling of flying in Xichen’s animal form. He would never get to experience that again.

Then there was the surprising closeness he felt to Lan Xichen; they had spent almost every minute of the time they’d been body-swapped in each other’s company. He wondered, with a tinge of sadness, if things would go back to how they had been before, once things returned to normal. He felt like they understood each other much better than they had before, so hopefully not. But what if Lan Xichen wanted nothing to do with him, when they didn’t have to pretend to be each other anymore?

He stroked the soft black fur of the cat asleep on his chest as he turned the problem over.

He really didn’t want to lose this...friendship?...relationship?...with Lan Xichen. The more he had gotten to know the other, the more he’d learned about Lan Xichen’s personality, and what made him tick, the more in love he had fallen with his husband.

His fingers stilled as he realised where his thoughts had drifted.

Yes, he was in love with Lan Xichen. What a cruel irony to fall in love with your political match of a husband. After you had spent several years avoiding him, humiliated him and left him alone and adrift in a life he had never expected for himself.

Then to come back and just fall in love like nothing of the other actions had gone before.

He was fucked.

He couldn’t even claim it was merely hormones, because as the other was currently residing in Jiang Cheng’s own body, he could confirm with certainty sexual attraction did not enter into it in the slightest. He was more likely to grow hard while looking in the mirror at the body he currently inhabited, (no need for Lan Xichen to find out about that little embarrassment though).

It was genuinely love.

He fell asleep that night with a frown of worry on his brow.

***

The gentle fusses at the magical nape of his neck where delightful, and always guaranteed to coax his purr from him.

He came awake slowly, stretching his long, agile body out to it’s full length, claws flashing as each individual toe was unfurled to it’s full extent.

This was luxurious. The hand moved to stroke the full length of his back from neck to tail base, and it was only as he began a rigorous grooming of his paw that he realised what was wrong.

He paused, his paw held up and tongue out as shock froze him in place.

That caused a soft chuckle to rumble in the chest below him.

He rather ill-advisedly decided to swap his cat for his human form, reasoning he could do with the ability to think clearly. Without allowing for the fact that his human form would still be sprawled out on top of the other. Which helped his ability to think not at all.

“Uh, Xichen, I’m so sorry, I didn’t think” he tried to scramble away, but a gentle yet strong arm around his waist, and a hand in his hair, held him in place.

“Thinking is overrated sometimes, Wanyin. Thinking didn’t get us anywhere before. May I kindly request for you stop thinking for a while?”

That wouldn’t be difficult at all, stretched out against the full length of the man he loved, Jiang Cheng realised as he went instead with instinct, and bent in to capture Lan Xichen’s soft, sweetly parted lips beneath his own.

#XiCheng #Fur and Feathers AU #Lan Xichen #Jiang Cheng #Wei Wuxian #Lan Wangji #falling in love #angst #with a happy ending #mdzs #mdzs fic #mdzs fanfic #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #Shay's stuff #enemies to friends to lovers

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fauzhee10069 · 4 years ago

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JoJolion timeline LOG

I finally made this, the ultimate guide of JoJolion timeline which will be updated and revised frequently. Corrections are welcome.

Unknown Timeline (circa Meiji Era: 1868-1912)

The birth of Tooru, a rock-human.

1891

The Steels stored the Holy Corpse underground so that it will never be taken advantage by anyone, anymore.

Stephen Steel had also told Johnny about the Underground Shelter.

1901

Johnny Joestar took Holy Corpse that was stored underground to save his family, he was being pursued by American Government Agents to Japan.

November 11 evening: death of Johnny Joestar and creation of Les Feuilles.

November 12 morning: Johnny's corpse was found by the authorities.

November 13: Johnny's death and the discovery of a child were announced in Yashirokita News.

December 7: Yashirokita News reported that Johnny's death was considered an accident.

Theory:

Johnny’s infinite spin & his corpse caused the land in Higashikata property to have the equivalent exchange ability.

The Higashikata first born son is dressed as girl to trick the demon that causes the disease. It happens to Tsurugi, Tsurugi’s father (Jobin), Tsurugi’s grandpa (Norisuke IV), and Norisuke IV’s grandpa (Norisuke II). Is it possible that the curse of hereditary rock disease starts from Norisuke I’s children?

1911

Lucy Steel who worked under Speedwagon Foundation was investigating Morioh Hunting Ground in Japan because it was similar to the Devil’s Palm.

1938

Locacaca was discovered by Australians in New Guinea.

1941

Lucy Steel went to Morioh once again to investigate Morioh's hunting grounds near the orchard owned by the Higashikata Fruit Company, she was also researching Locacaca fruit. She met a boy named Fumi and both of them encountered the 「Radio Gaga」’s incident.

During Lucy and Joseph Joestar (Fumi)’s encounter with 「Radio Gaga」’s incident, Tooru was seen planting a Locacaca in a pot near Higashikata’s orchard.

1942

All reports of the Locacaca ceased after the Imperial Japanese Army invaded New Guinea in 1942 during the World War II.

1944

Lucy Steel passed away from a lung disease at the age of 68.

1952

Joseph Joestar (Fumi) met Suzi Q from the Speedwagon Foundation. They eventually married and their daughter, (Kira) Holy Joestar was born in 1959.

1963

In winter, Higashikata Norisuke IV contracted the family disease and his mother, Tomoko sacrificed herself using equivalent exchange on Higashikata’s land.

1991

Higashikata Caato sacrificed the bully boy to cure Jobin, using equivalent exchange and murdering the bully boy in the process. Jobin awakened his Stand, Speed King.

Kira Yoshiteru (Holy’s husband) died.

Kujo Josefumi was born in S. City.

1994

17 years ago, Mamezuku Rai’s father died in a landslide when he rushed out of the house to investigate harmful insects in the family’s orchard.

1996

Caato was sentenced for 15 years as prisoner 28 at the Stone Ocean prison. Norisuke IV divorced her while she was still in prison.

Unknown Timeline

Chapter 75: Mamezuku family’s cultivating techniques were leaked, leading to a competitor, which were connected with some local money-lenders, managing to steal an entire crop of pear and bringing down the fruit trees. Rai’s parents had to part with their orchards. Blaming his parents, Rai began to live alone in a ski slope, cultivating his own fruits despite the difficulties.

Chapter 100: Rai’s mother died long after the death of his father, she underwent great mental anguish brought on by the debts because of the pear orchard before dying of illness.

1997 (circa)

Rai (aged 17) met Norisuke IV when Norisuke IV came to buy his grown strawberries. Impressed by their quality, Norisuke IV appointed Rai in secret to be his personal fruit grower and appraiser. Rai's existence in the company was kept with the utmost secrecy, with not even Norisuke IV's family & his own heir, Jobin ever being informed.

Kira Holy Joestar saved Josefumi’s life in hospital (the timeline was ±1997 because Kira mentioned that they supposed to watch Titanic).

1997/1998

Higashikata Daiya (around 2-3 years old) fell into the faults and her vision deteriorated but she awakened her Stand, California King Bed.

1998

Holy began to work at T.H. Medical University Hospital.

2001

Hirose Yasuho met Tooru at the first time during her summer camp, Tooru was looking for someone to have his identity stolen and started impersonating as Akefu Satoru.

2002

Tsurugi Higashikata was born and Yasuho’s parents divorced.

2005

Yasuho bought a Qing Dynasty Hairclip, she got attacked by it as it turned out to be a rock animal.

Yasuho met Holy and Yoshikage in hospital, Holy also saved Yasuho’s life and Yoshikage destroyed the hairclip.

Theory:

Kira Yoshikage said that his mother (Holy) said something weird and for certain reason she is no longer a doctor, and Yasuho’s attending physician.

Is this an early sign of Holy’s illness and the arrival of The Head Doctor (and his gang)?

Or was the beginning that Holy builds a hidden lab and did research to Locacaca?

If it is the first case, it’s quite impressive that she managed to become a professor.

2008

Holy became a professor at T.G. University.

Summer, Sasame Ojiro encountered Kira Yoshikage.

Norisuke IV hired Yagiyama Yotsuyu as his architect to design Higashikata mansion and The Teahouse in front of the train station that sells fruit.

Higashikata Jobin had an argument with his father in the stadium regarding the business, he mentioned that the flow of people around the main shop in front of the train station has changed because those T-University people (who supposed to be doctors) put a mall at the west exit.

Still in the stadium, Jobin met Yotsuyu (who was still in the process of designing a mansion for Higashikata) and Damokan group.

Theory:

The cooperation between Damokan group and Higashikata (Jobin) in smuggling Locacaca & money-laundering might begin here.

Those T-University Doctors whom Jobin was talking about, could it be that they are the Head Doctor’s gang? Jobin said that the mall they built hindered their family business, perhaps the Head Doctor’s gang intentionally disrupted their business to lure Jobin into working with Damokan group?

2009

Kira Yoshikage worked as cargo ship doctor, he found a Rock Human (Aisho) aboard his ship.

Dainenjiyama Aisho disguised as rock from Port Moresby for use in an artificial garden, the client was the Higashikata.

Yoshikage investigated Aisho and found about their shady business, selling illegal imported fruits and teaming up with the Higashikata family. Kira decided to steal one of those fruits.

Iwakiri Atsunori was a batter for the Seiten Birdies, but he damaged his shoulder.

Higashikata mansion was still in the process of being renovated and was likely completed in the same year.

Unknown Timeline (around 2005?-2009)

Holy began to fall ill as the hospital gained a new number of doctors as well as a new Head Doctor.

Holy created the hidden lab and did scientific analysis on the Locacaca.

2010

Iwakiri, age 24, had a transaction with Aisho, then ate a Locacaca fruit while Yoshikage was spying on them.

Yoshikage and Josefumi stole 2 Locacaca branches to cure Holy.

2011

March, 6 months after Yoshikage and Josefumi stole 2 Locacaca branches, Japan (including Morioh) was heavily damaged by a tsunami. The Locacaca tree wilted and the Rock Humans noticed that 2 branches were stolen.

March 11, the night following the tsunami, Wall Eyes appeared in Morioh.

Sometimes after March 11, Nijimura Kei discovered the equivalent exchange on Higashikata’s land.

Friday, August 19, 10 months, 16 days, 3 hours and 24 minutes after they stole 2 Locacaca branches, Yoshikage and Josefumi were tracked down by Damo Tamaki and Yotsuyu.

3 days before JoJolion begins, deaths and fusion of Yoshikage and Josefumi. The creation of Josuke.

2011 (JoJolion main timeline begins)

Hirose Yasuho discovers Josuke's unconscious body.

Kira Yoshikage’s dead body is discovered and Josuke is adopted by the Higashikata family.

Higashikata Joshu awakens his Stand, Nut King Call in Shakedown Road.

Death of Yotsuyu. Higashikata Josuke and Norisuke IV learn of the rock-humans and Locacaca's existence.

Death of Aisho. Yasuho and Tsurugi learn about Jobin’s cooperation with Damokan group.

Death of A. Phex Brothers. Josuke learns about Josefumi through Sakunami Karera.

6 months after the tsunami that hit Morioh, Damo goes to the Higashikata's house. The same day, Damo is killed by Josuke.

2 weeks before Caato returns to the Higashikata house, Joshu gets attacked by Milagro Man.

Caato, age 52, finishes her 15 year-long incarceration in the Stone Ocean prison, after 3662 working days. She goes to Higashikata house and visits her family.

Defeat of Dolomité. Josuke and Yasuho learn Jobin’s true role within Damokan group and the hint of a greater organization.

Josuke and Yasuho meet Mamezuku Rai. Deaths of Urban Guerrilla and Doremifasolati Do. There is a greater rock humans organization than Damokan group that also hunts down the new Locacaca.

The Countdown of New Locacaca’s Harvest Begins:

12d4h33m: Jobin buries Ozon Baby.

12d2h11m: Josuke and Rai are in Higashikata’s underground.

12d2h2m: still in the Ozon Baby arc, Jobin and Tsurugi are in CCTV room.

The Higashikata family's orchard is burnt down by Tsurugi and Jobin.

Death of Poor Tom.

10d19h6m: Higashikata Mitsuba and Yasuho are in T.G. University Hospital.

Mitsuba learns about the equivalent exchange and Locacaca.

Yasuho meets her ex-boyfriend, Tooru.

Yasuho and Mitsuba discover a hidden lab & stash of Locacaca plants within the hospital, which are destroyed by Rai.

Death of Tomoki Wu.

7d1h2m: Mitsuba arrives in front of Tsurugi's school to take him back to their home after a school trip to the Omoshiroyama-Yamadera trail.

7d0h44m: Mina (the girl who bullied Tsurugi) is having apparently been crushed between the iron gates of the school. As the leader asks if anyone saw what happened, the girl that alerts her claims that she saw Tsurugi pushed the gates closed.

6d4h12m: Josuke, Yasuho, and Rai pursue the head of the Locacaca Organization, Akefu Satoru, but are unable to capture him or see his face. A bystander is accidentally killed during the pursuit, leading to a police manhunt for Josuke and Rai.

6d3h25m: A parent meeting regarding the incident at Tsurugi’s school.

Mitsuba sees The Head Doctor on CCTV record.

Mitsuba and Jobin have a pillow talk.

5d1h5m: Ojiro and his girlfriend, Kitani Maako (Makorin) are talking about Higashikata’s land and fortune.

Unknown timeline (prior to the fight with Ojiro): Caato goes to Higashikata house and meets Jobin, Jobin tells her about the New Locacaca and orchard burning.

3d1h19m: 3 days before the harvest, Ojiro locates the New Locacaca hidden inside the Higashikata estate and sends proof of its existence to Makorin. However, both of them are eliminated by Jobin.

2d0h0m: Josuke & Rai discover that Akefu Satoru will be attending a lecture the next day. They are attacked by Satoru's Stand and are pursued by the police, with Josuke being injured gravely enough to be sent to T.G. University Hospital as Rai is taken into police custody.

Yasuho discovers the true face of Satoru Akefu.

Tsurugi begins to succumb from the effects of the Rock Disease.

1d?h?m/30h: Satoru's lecture takes place at T.G. University Hospital, starts at 11:00 am, introducing Locacaca 6251.

Josuke awakens in the hospital and is attacked yet again by Satoru's Stand. He meets Holy and she helps him recover with Locacaca 6251.

0d3h24m: Yasuho goes to Higashikata mansion and sneaks in Tsurugi’s room. She gets caught by Jobin and Paisley Park gets flushed in the toilet.

Norisuke IV finds out about the murder that Jobin committed to Ojiro. He gets attacked by Speed King and unconscious.

0d2h11m: Yasuho and Jobin are gravely wounded, Satoru gets pursued by a reporter while Josuke just sits back, waiting for Satoru menacingly. Meanwhile, Tooru is just vibing while listening to Elvis Presley.

Josuke & Rai fights Dododo De Dadada.

Rai is dying by Wonder of U’s calamity.

The death of Jobin and Rai.

Yasuho eats the new Locacaca, discovers Tooru as the source of calamity and calls Kei.

Joshu fails his redemption.

The death of Kei.

Caato does an equivalent exchange with Tooru and dying Tsurugi while also destroying the remaining New Locacaca plant.

The death of Caato and Tooru.

0d0h13m: Norisuke IV is gravely wounded and his body is dragged by Tsurugi.

Locacaca was gone forever in Japan.

Holy's fate is left hanging (she's still in a coma in the hospital).

Norisuke IV is discharged from the hospital.

Josuke is officially accepted as Higashikata’s family member and Yasuho walks out the door.

FIN

#jojolion spoilers #timeline #jjba part 8 #jojo's bizarre adventure #yeah i'm finally so done with this #jojolion theory #jojolion

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anotheruserwithnoname · 7 years ago

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Thoughts on Star Trek Discovery after 5 episodes

(Spoilers for Discovery S01E05 and Orville S01E06)

Episode 5 of Star Trek Discovery aired last night in Canada (up here the network Space airs it, so we don’t need to rely on streaming to view it). “Choose Your Pain” was its title and it’s ironic that it aired a few days after The Orville’s surprisingly hard-hitting “Krill” because it actually allows for something very close to an apples-to-apples comparison.

I’m going to go into spoilers, plus this will be a very long post (apologies; this is Exhibit A to show why I’m not on Twitter), so I’ll put a break here. The tl;dr is that, although I’m still willing to give it a chance, I’m still not “feeling” Discovery, which after 5 episodes is a concern; whereas, I find The Orville not only captures the classic spirit of Trek better, it managed in one single episode to make its Klingon analogue more interesting than the real Klingons in their current incarnation.

Before I begin, I wanted to set the scene to explain where I’m coming from. There is a lot of Discovery-bashing going on, and I don’t support that and this essay isn’t intended to be a bash. Although I am very critical of the show and not 100% certain that I’m going to stick with it much longer (though I’ll probably stick with it till its midseason break, at least), it’s not my intent to become a basher because then I’d be a hypocrite. I was a defender of Star Trek Enterprise throughout its entire run, and was upset to see it bashed mercilessly, to the point where I divorced myself from Star Trek and Star Trek fandom after it ended in 2005. Fortunately, Doctor Who had just come back on TV so I switched my allegiances to Who (which I’d been a fan of since the early 80s, but it became more intense). Fast-forward to 2017, and due to a mix of disappointment over what the series has delivered since Christmas 2015, combined with decisions regarding the show moving forward, I'm now divorcing from Doctor Who (as anyone who follows my blog knows). So with Star Trek back on TV the opportunity to move my allegiances back to Trek exists ... but Discovery isn’t doing it for me. Not yet. Instead, The Orville, Seth MacFarlane’s underrated (in more ways than one) homage is the show that is earning my affection. I know I’m not alone in that.

But here’s the thing, and why I don’t really see the need to “bash” Discovery: because The Orville is so much like “proper” Star Trek - the optimism, the crew-as-family dynamic, the introspective and “ripped from the headlines”-inspired stories, and general sense of fun - this actually allows Discovery to seek its own path (even if that means delivering “improper” Trek), allowing both shows to co-exist (which they could regardless - it’s not as if they’re in direct competition).

But Discovery has problems. Before I get into that, though, some positive thoughts.

This week’s episode introduced Rainn Wilson as Harry Mudd, a character immortalized by Roger C. Carmel in the original series. And I thought he did a good job. I don’t have the same issues with recasting characters as some others do (I liked the guy they had playing Sarek earlier, too). My only complaint is they made him darker than Carmel’s version, which felt a bit inconsistent. But then again this is 10 years before Kirk encountered him and people change (it could be argued that Carmel’s version is more insane than Wilson’s, and maybe we’re seeing why in Discovery). I loved the reference to Stella, his wife, which was a great call-forward to the TOS episode “I, Mudd”. Trivia: Carmel was supposed to reprise Mudd for an episode of TNG, but the actor died before it was filmed; I believe some aspects of what was planned for Mudd - including a scene where he was supposed to actually pay tribute to his frenemy, Captain Kirk - were later reused when they brought Scotty forward into the TNG era in “Relics”. So having Mudd appear in a modern-day Trek is an idea that’s been kicking around for 30 years.

Obviously, Mudd will be back and I’m looking forward to it. I’d rather he be the recurring baddie than the new Klingons. More on that in a moment.

I also liked the on-screen reference to Jonathan Archer, Christopher Pike and Robert April early in the episode. Robert April was established in the animated series as the very first captain of the Enterprise, predating Pike. Since TAS is not considered canon (or at least it wasn’t considered canon during the pre-2005 era; it might have changed since), this is the first “canonical” acknowledgement of April in live action. I appreciated that.

I also liked Capt. Lorca in this episode. After two weeks of being just “there”, Lorca came into his own with this episode. And his backstory is interesting.

But I have criticisms of this episode, and of the show itself as we hit week 5. Starting with a minor point, after four weeks of keeping a lid on language, the swearing in this episode was awkward and clearly put in there “because we can” - there was nothing charming or cool about the first use of the F-word (twice in the same scene, yet) in the Trek franchise. I’m not one to go “oooh, swearing, bad” (The Thick of It is one of my favourite TV shows, for god’s sake), but there’s a time and place, and it just didn’t work - it came across as vulgar and awkward. If they’re going to have people swear in Discovery, fine, but don’t make it feel like “hey, we can swear now!” Torchwood ran into this same issue - and the swearing during Series 1 felt unnatural as a result. If they want Lorca and his crew to turn the air blue, they should get Armando Iannucci in to show them how it’s done.

What will be the deal-breaker for me is if this show continues to be populated with characters I don’t give a damn about. I like Michael (who was for the first time not the focus of an episode) and Lorca has potential - all the characters have potential - but 5 weeks in they should be further along than they are in terms of establishing them, even taking into account the two-episode prologue and the fact a core character only debuted this week.

Five weeks in, and without cheating online, I still don't remember the names of most of the main characters because they’ve made so little impression on me. Michael is fine, Lorca is fine, and I know the new guy is named Tyler (mainly because I’m curious as to whether he’s related to Jose Tyler of Christopher Pike’s Enterprise in “The Cage”), but the rest - by now they should have made enough of an impression for me to at least remember their names, not just call them “Michael’s roommate”, “the jerk who runs the spore drive and who might or might not be the chief engineer but we can’t tell”, “Odo 2.0”, “the doctor who lives with the spore drive guy and who I thought was the ship’s doctor until he mentioned that he answers to a chief medical officer who we’ve yet to see”, “the incompetent who got herself killed by the spore monster last week in a scene Seth MacFarlane would have rejected as too silly”, “the roboty woman on the bridge who kinda looks like Nebula from Guardians of the Galaxy,” and “the woman whose head is half shaved”. In fact I think this was the first episode in which those last two individuals were actually identified by names on screen.

By comparison, I had not just the Orville character names but their functions nailed down by Episode 2 of that show. And I had much more invested in them as characters, even early on (and by “Krill” I find I want to know more about what’s happening with Borus and Klyden and their child, Alara’s love life, and whether Ed and Kelly are going to get back together or not). With Discovery it’s almost as if they’re all being set up to be redshirts. (As it is, I really don’t expect to Michael’s roommate - I looked it up; her name is Tilly - to survive the season. Too much telegraphing about her being naive and having dreams for the future.) Maybe they are if the show is taking the Game of Thrones “anyone can die” approach and if there is a reason why we’ve never heard of Spock having an adopted human sister before now.

When I started writing this very long (sorry!) blog entry, I mentioned an apples-to-apples comparison between Discovery and Orville. This week, “Choose Your Pain” and “Krill” both involved captains boarding enemy vessels and learning more about the bad guys. And it really drove home the fact that the new Klingons are rather boring. Never mind the different make-up and all that - I’m sure they’ll come up with a workaround to explain that the same way Enterprise did back in 2005 with the Augments story arc (and I didn’t miss the fact they name-dropped eugenics this week) - they just don’t have the spark of the Klingons of old, or even the Abramsverse versions. Not saying there aren‘t promising signs - I kind of like the fact the show is shipping cult leader Voq with the female officer L’Rell. Every episode so far has included focus on the Klingons. But in only one episode, The Orville managed to develop a very well-rounded picture of the Krill, making them relevant, interesting, sympathetic, and “villains” we want to see more of. The Klingons on Discovery? I want more Harry Mudd, fewer Klingons. Of course, a big difference between Orville and Discovery is the use of humour. Discovery pretty much has none, while Orville is a dramedy. Which was driven home during the climax of the Discovery episode when we were actually treated to an unexpected piece of Orville-like comedy when the female Klingon captain, who has the hots for Tyler. Encountering him trying to escape, she let off with something like “After all we mean to each other, you’re leaving?” (not an exact quote). It was a funny moment, but poorly timed. Seriously, we’re supposed to see her as a threat (and an ongoing one seeing as Lorca doesn’t finish her off as opposed to every other Klingon he encounters), and she spouts dialogue more appropriate for a spoof? Compare to The Orville, which usually knows when to be funny and when not to be. Having Ed Mercer and Gordon Molloy facing the possibility of having to kill a bunch of Krill children in order to save a human colony, and Mercer saying “If we kill those kids ... we have no souls” was a far more hard-hitting and dramatic moment than anything “Choose Your Pain” offered. And once things got serious, they got serious. The ending of “Krill” was chilling as Mercer realized that instead of saving a bunch of kids, he created a bunch of future enemies instead, instantly giving the series a long-term aspect as the potential is there for it to revisit this fact years from now, if it survives that long. The Avis rent-a-car jokes were funny, and the opening sequence where Bortus does his best Matter-Eater Lad impersonation (Google it) was cute, and I loved the gag where Ed starts talking before Alara can open a channel, but it was the serious moments that made “Krill” stand out. The next episode looks serious as well as it casts a long-overdue spotlight on Lt. LaMarr.So to sum up: I’m not ready yet to say “Discovery sucks” as some have. I don’t think it does, despite all I’ve written here. It has issues, yes, but every Trek series has issues and teething pains. I am concerned that the characters aren’t gelling for me and that’s what’s going to make me decide to keep watching in the long term. On the other hand, The Orville is proving to be a great show that also has had its rough patches and its teething pains, but it managed to hit the ground running a lot faster in terms of establishing characters and stories and tone. I am in the market for a sci-fi show to replace Doctor Who, and so far The Orville is winning the battle against Star Trek Discovery. But I’m not willing to write Discovery off ... yet.

#star trek discovery #the orville #calling it as i see it

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