#see it's really exactly like X-Men I promise I wouldn't lie to you

[sammysdewysensitiveeyes]

[kasagia]

Tell me it's you...

Pairing: young!Aleksander "Eric" Morozova/Darkling x fem!heartrender! reader Summary: The legendary Darkling saves your life from the Drüskells. You tell your friend Eric about this, but he advises you against seeking the Shadow Summoner. You don't listen to him. And you find him closer than you dared to think he was. Now you beg him to stay with you. Aleksander Morozova's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~Main Masterlist Oneshot inspired by: "Tell me it's you" from Mufasa... yeah, I just couldn't leave that song. I never thought The Lion King would inspire me to write a oneshot for Darkling... Hope you enjoy it! Taglist: @aoi-targaryen @chelseyyouraverageluigi @watersquirtpewpewboomm @summersummoner-pat

"It was... like something out of an adventure novel. I'm telling you, Eric, I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. Suddenly, shadows appeared; I couldn't see practically anything, and then they cut Drüskells in half. I... I've never seen such power. In anyone. Ever." You tell your friend in shock, half-sitting, half-lying on his bed as he bustles around you, tending to your wounds.

"You may have imagined it. No one has seen the Darkling or any of his ancestors in centuries. Shadow Summoners are freaks of nature. The fact that they are virtually nonexistent shows that they shouldn't exist." The dark-haired man replies dismissively.

You grab his hand as he's about to apply gauze soaked in the medicinal plant dimension to your cut brow and give him an offended look.

"No, Eric, I know what I saw. Maybe not exactly; maybe I didn't really see him, but it was definitely a Shadow Summoner. As when the king's men were pursuing us and we were hidden from their view by a cloud of shadow. The fact that there are few of them proves how powerful they are. Not everyone is meant to wield such responsibility on their arms. To be a saviour." You say and let go of his hand.

"You speak too highly of him. He's probably a power-hungry maniac, a heretic, not some Grisha saviour."

"I know it's him. I'm sure of it. Just as I know it's him and only the Shadow Summoner who can stop this hunt for us. We have to find him. Maybe you don't feel it, but I do. Without him... without him we have no reason to even try to fight the Tsar, Fjerda, Shu Han, and Ravka for our freedom."

Eric sighs and shakes his head in disbelief at your stubbornness. But he doesn't have time to respond to you, because suddenly his mother enters their one-room, small cottage.

He pulls away from you and gives his mother a warning look. You only stop yourself from rolling your eyes at him because the older woman walks straight to you, ignoring her son.

"The whole village is gossiping that they saw my son bring you unconscious and bloody to our hut. What happened to you, little heartreder? Did you use your powers on yourself?"

She nods at the young healer in the doorway while examining you. And if you didn't know her better, you'd almost believe the older woman was actually worried about you. Luda steps to your side and uses her powers to heal you. You clench your teeth and look at your teacher, slightly offended.

"I was taking Marika home. We took a shorter path through the forest, and the Drüskells attacked us. She ran away and alarmed Eric, and I... somehow managed to scare them away." You lie to her about the last part, feeling your friend's burning gaze on you.

Earlier, you promised him that your... unusual encounter with the Shadow Summoner would stay between you. It wasn't safe to talk about them. Besides, you doubt the old woman would believe your story, however true it is.

You nod in thanks to Luda and try to ignore the burning feeling of jealousy as she sends one of her longing glances towards Eric. You quickly regain control, reminded of the watchful gaze of the older woman who was still present.

"I don't understand why that girl called my son, since he controls his powers like a baby controls urine." You're very proud of how you manage to keep from snorting in amusement at her ridiculous remark. Eric, on the other hand, seems to not appreciate at all his mother's teasing.

"I'm here, mother."

"And you should be in the village and working. I don't know what you want to feed yourself with, but now that winter is coming, it will be harder and harder. Stop hovering over that poor girl like a dog over a hedgehog and go find yourself some useful occupation. I'll look after her."

"But, mother..."

"Go, Eric. I'll see you later." You assure him with a warm, gentle smile.

He sighs and gives his mother one last, warning look and approaches the bed. He presses a kiss to your forehead, and after making sure your wounds have healed nicely, he leaves.

"What?" You ask her, blushing slightly with embarrassment as she stares at you.

"One day, he'll put me in my grave, and he'll regret it." She sighs and stands, her black hair interwoven with more frequent streaks of grey, and you see her hands shaking slightly as she hands you a cup of herbal tea.

Lately, you've started to notice that she... stopped looking so young. Before, you couldn't believe that Eric was her son, but now, it seems, time has started to catch up with her. And she's become impossibly more grumpy and stubborn.

"Will he?" You ask, raising an eyebrow teasingly and taking a sip.

"Don't let yourself get carried away, little brat. Just because you make him more bearable doesn't give you the right to mock me. You know perfectly well that this halfwit is head over heels in love with you. So for the sake of all of us, kill it before you break your hearts."

"I... we are just friends." You persist in refusing to admit your feelings to her. She looks at you for a long moment and sighs, nodding at you reproachfully.

"Believe the words of an old woman, Y/N. You... you deserve something more. Don't destroy your peace and life because of one pair of pretty eyes."

"We are not together." You repeat yourself, not even trying to explain to her how beautiful Eric's dark irises were. Worth any pain he could bring you—something you doubt would ever happen anyway.

He was too good to hurt you. Ever. However. He was... Eric. You could always count on his help and support; he always somehow managed to be there for you when you needed him the most. So how could you fight your growing feelings for him?

"I know. But I also know him and you. So trust me when I say, he is not good enough for you."

"Aren't you confusing your roles? Shouldn't you be saying this to Eric?" The woman frowns the moment you say her son's name.

She sighs and gets out of bed, arms folded, when she was staring at you—as if her cold, disapproving gaze would change the way your stupid heart sped up whenever he was around.

"Usually the voice of reason does not break through the deafening scream of foolish love. And this boy... he is a lost cause."

"Maybe I like lost causes?"

"Y/N... you are a smart girl. So for your own good, leave before it's too late." She gathers your things and offers you a hand to help you up.

You accept her unusual, gentle help and take your bundle from her. You absentmindedly stroke the charm on your bracelet—a small stone of your favourite gemstone that Eric gave you for your birthday—as you think about how to respond to her.

"I... I am not going anywhere. I promised him I won't leave him. He is my friend."

"Ehhh... stupid child." The woman shakes her head, irritated by our stubbornness, and leads you to the exit.

You are already on your way to the village when Baghra notices a familiar figure lurking in the recesses of the hut. Her mood darkens even further when she realises an extra, unwanted pair of ears has heard your conversation.

"Happy, Aleksander? Or should I call you Eric?" The woman huffs in exasperation and grabs her old journal from the table.

"You yourself said I should hold my real name away from anyone." Aleksander answers her with the same cold, emotionless tone she gives him and steps out of his shadows.

Only now does Baghra take a moment to look at him. He snorts when he sees the streak of blood carefully hidden beneath his cloak from your view. But not from hers.

"I should also mention your stupid heart then. She will die before you, you know that, right? No matter how much you love her or how hard you will try to protect her, she will grow old, and you will remain in the same shape as today."

"Unless I stop summoning."

"As if you could. I bet you've already done it today, right?" Aleksander turns his gaze away from her. He watches your retreating figure from the window, his heart clenching at the thought that one day he will no longer be able to be by your side or watch you from his shadows. "Let her live her life. She may be a powerful heartrender, but she is still not us, Aleksander. She won't live forever; she is not equal to us. Can you watch her slipping away from your fingers each day? Watch her die in your arms?"

He clenches his fists. Unconsciously, he lets his shadows break free and spread throughout the hut. Baghra sighs and approaches him. She places her hand hesitantly on his shoulder, forcing him to look her in the eyes.

"We overstayed here, Aleksander. I leave in a week. And if you really care about her, you will leave with me." Baghra looks at him for a long moment, then lets go of him. She heads for the exit and puts her hand on the doorknob but stops when she hears his voice.

"And what if I don't?"

Cold silence cuts through the air between them. Baghra looks at her son over her shoulder, and for a moment in his eyes, she sees the glow of her old self. A naive version that didn't yet know the true realities of this world, the curse hidden behind her powers. And since Aleksander wouldn't listen to her, to draw from her experience, all she could do was leave him to realise alone, in pain, that there were no others like them, that they were condemned to a life of solitude.

"Then prepare yourself for losing her anyway."

Aleksander clenches his fists as he is left alone in the hut. He lets his wonders flow out of him as he sinks into total darkness. And even the memory of your smile, something that always managed to fight his darkness, only makes the shadows grow thicker around him. Because as much as he hated his mother, he knew there was some truth in her words. You would eventually leave. And he would be all alone. Again. And even if he told you who he really was... it wasn't at all sure that you wouldn't turn away from him like everyone else before you did.

The truth was that you would cast him out. So he has to leave first... before you break his heart, that you didn't even know that belonged to you the moment he met you and got to know you.

He screams, letting his shadows in him exit through his mouth, swallowing the tears that roll down his cheeks.

"I've asked everywhere, and no one has noticed anyone new coming to the village. So it must be one of the locals or someone who arrived recently. But no one comes to mind, with... well, him. My investigation is at a standstill."

You grumble as you walk beside Eric through the forest path. Snow falls around you, causing a few small flakes to cling to his dark coat and hair. He looked adorable. Even with his red nose and the grimace that appeared on his face whenever you mentioned the Shadow Summoner in his presence.

"Maybe that's a good thing? Maybe he doesn't want to be found? Maybe he prefers to stay in his shadows, where he belongs."

"No, Eric, you... you didn't see what I saw, the power that flowed from him. He killed them all with a wave of his hand; it... it was incredible. If only he hadn't hidden, if only he had gathered us all and led us... maybe we would never have had to hide again, never have to make new homes, never have to worry about being discovered, about having to run away and start our lives over for fear of being tracked down and killed for who we are. You must feel the same way I do. Haven't you had enough? That every time you find a home, someone comes and takes it away just because we can do more than them? That we have power that they fear? Eric... I can't live like this. I'll find him. Even if it's the last thing I do, I have to convince him... there's no other way for us."

"That's a pipe dream, Y/N. Even if he gathers us all... forms an army... even among our own kind, there will be those who would seek to destroy him." He replies sceptically and stops to look at the frozen river. You sigh and shove your hands in your pockets, trying to warm yourself up a little.

"There will always be some. Is that why we have to keep hiding in our holes like rats? The Tsar will never change his mind about us if we don't act. We can't bury our heads in the sand, Eric. I'm not going to... I'm not going to let my children, if I have them, live in a world like that... to go through what we went through."

"Y/N..." He sighs and looks at you for the first time since you brought up the topic of the mysterious Shadow Summoner.

You frown as you see a glimpse of pain and concern in his eyes, wondering what could have caused him such a negative agitation. Before you can say anything back, suddenly an arrow flies near you and embeds itself in the ground not far away from you.

"Come with me." Eric takes your hand, not waiting for your reaction as he starts to drag you away.

He runs, pulling you in the opposite direction of where he heard the barking of dogs and the shouting of men. As you pass the arrow, you see the distinctive Fjerdan finish on it. You curse under your breath and speed up, running with Eric to one of the safe havens you and the other Grisha had set up in case the Drüskells 'witch hunt' resumes.

Unfortunately, you're running too slowly, or there are too many Fjerdans (you can't tell because Eric is pulling you along and setting your pace so fast that you can barely move your legs, let alone look back) to lose them. Your lungs are burning, and your heart is beating fast as you wade through the folds of snow.

You doubt that you'll be able to defend both yourself and Eric because you certainly won't leave him alone to these bloodthirsty men. Or that was the plan, before he pushed you into some Saint-knows-where hole big enough for one of you to hide.

"Stay here."

"No, Eric..." You hiss in desperation and grab his sleeve, realising he'll die if he goes alone.

"Stay here, Y/N. I will be fine. I promise. Just stay right here and wait for me." He cups your cheek in his hand and presses his lips to your forehead as you sob quietly into your hand, holding him tight by his sleeve, not wanting to let go. "Hush. I'll be back. I promise. Just stay here and be quiet."

Despite your efforts, he somehow manages to wiggle out of your grip. As he asked, you press your hand to your mouth and stop all the cries and sounds from escaping your throat. You close your eyes and focus on your surroundings, trying to feel the beating of hearts around you.

You shiver as the ground above you shakes with the force of the Drüskells that are chasing Eric. You try to help him in any way you can, slowing some of their heartbeats, tiring them out more, even managing to stop a few of them altogether—something you could never do in your lessons with Baghra. But it's still not enough; you still feel like there are so many more of them than Eric can handle alone.

So you do probably the stupidest thing, but the only right thing you can do in this situation. You come out of your hiding place and run in the direction Eric ran.

When you reach the clearing, the first thing you notice is him, standing surrounded by Fjerdarns. You see his eyes widen when he sees you, too surprised and frightened to notice one of the Drüskells sneaking up on him.

"Eric!" You scream and lunge at him, your hands moving in a practiced motion, manipulating the blood flow of the Fjerdan who wanted to attack him.

But you walk into the trap yourself, and before you can blink, one of them shoots you with an arrow. You scream in bewilderment and grab your arm, trying to staunch the blood while controlling as many of the Fjerdan soldiers as you can, trying to keep yourself and Eric alive for as long as you can.

And then, shadows spread across the clearing. You close your eyes and sigh with relief as their familiar coldness takes hold of you. Men scream in terror, hunting dogs growl around, but after a moment, everything falls silent. All you hear are two heartbeats: yours, calm and sluggish after losing blood from the wound you inflicted with the shot, and Eric's, quick and sudden.

Before you know it, you begin to sink to your knees, both physically exhausted from running and using your power and emotionally exhausted from almost seeing your deaths.

"It's okay. It's okay. You are safe. I got you." Eric whispers, stroking your hair tenderly as he catches you at the last second. And then something inside you suddenly snaps.

Suddenly, you remember the exact moment your mysterious Shadow Summoner saved you all those weeks ago, and as it turns out, he did it again. Eric could summon shadows. He used them to save you for a second time. He... he was the Shadow Summoner. And with that revelation, you faint in his arms.

When you wake up, it's not by Eric's side like in all those romantic novels you like to read before going to bed—your passion that Eric laughs at you for. No. You wake all alone in some makeshift bed. Or rather, you wish you would wake up alone, because the first person you see is…

"Baghra? Am I in hell?"

"You were close enough." The woman grumbles, pressing a cloth to your shoulder. You hiss as you feel the herbs burn your healer-sealed skin. "My stupid son got it into his empty head because of your little accident that the Drüskelle came here for him. So he left. To give himself to them."

"What?! And you let him?!" I ask angrily and throw the blanket off me. I reach for my coat and quickly button it, searching the small room for my shoes.

"You know him. What was I supposed to do? Only two things can stop this stubborn moose: you and his death."

You sigh angrily at her and quickly tie your shoes. You hiss when your haste and carelessness slightly strain your injured arm. But the pain you feel is only an annoying distraction in the face of fear for Eric's life.

"He left a few hours ago. To the north. If you concentrate hard, you'll be able to feel his heartbeat." Baghra advises you as you take a pair of daggers from her. "Y/N." The woman grabs your elbow and forces you to look at her before you leave in a hurry. "Bring him back in one piece. And yourself too. Saints knows what that imbecile will do if anything happens to you again."

All you can do is nod at her as you leave one of the rooms in your hideout. You push your way through other Grisha, trying to get out of the abandoned tomb you all have turned into a base and back to the surface as quickly as possible.

Your blood boils; everything boils as you think about what will happen if you don't get to him in time. You wonder where he even got that stupid idea of ​​turning himself in to the Fjerdans. It won't solve your problem. They'll still be after you, even more when they realise that they killed... that they killed HIM.

You run through the snow, following Eric's footsteps and praying to every known saint that you'll make it in time. You had so many things to tell him... so many important confessions that you were afraid of. You still are. You realise that... Eric didn't tell the whole truth about himself, but on the other hand, you know that in his situation you would proceed just as carefully and maybe even more.

He was the Shadow Summoner. He created something, creatures that could kill people with a wave of his hand. He was something completely different from you and the rest of the Grisha, something much more powerful. And you know perfectly well that they will only listen to him and follow him. If ever there is anything good for you, it will only be with his rule over you.

Luckily, Eric doesn't run far from you. A few hours later, you're able to feel his heartbeat in the distance, or at least you assume it's his. It's strange to admit to yourself that you know that delicate rhythm perfectly, that you've been listening to that song of his heart unconsciously all those nights you spent together by the fire, snuggled up together, supposedly seeking extra warmth, but in reality subconsciously craving the closeness of the other.

You loved him. Even before the Shadow Summoner thing came to light. And you know he cared about you, too. And you would do anything to keep him with you…to make him what you and the other Grisha needed.

You almost fall to your knees with relief when you finally find him. He stands by the frozen river, staring at it with a blank expression, his fists clenched, completely oblivious to his surroundings. In any other situation, you would have snuck up to him, thrown your arms around his shoulders, and berated him for his lack of attention, but now, all you can do is stare at him silently.

Seeing him makes you realise who he is, what he's capable of, and honestly, all those scary stories about the powerful Shadow Summoner don't fit the Eric you know at all.

But you knew that no matter who he really was… you would be there for him. With him.

"Tell me it's you." You say, pulling him out of his own thoughts. He turns to you slowly, staring at you as if he's seen a ghost, as if he can't believe his eyes that he's seeing you.

"Y/N, you should be resting in the hideout..."

"Tell me it's you. I... I know it's you." You interrupt him and take a few steps closer to him.

He frowns at you, pretending not to know what you're on about, but from the way his eyes widen for a second and his heart skips a beat, you know he knows exactly what you are up to.

"I am afraid that I have no idea what you are talking about. Did you hurt yourself in the head? Let me see."

"Don't make me look crazy, Eric. I know, it's you. I may be stupid enough to not realise it earlier, but I am not that stupid to not see it now. You were always there at every major disaster, saving the day, like you knew exactly where to be; you saw more than any of us... For God's sake, you never even summoned a single damn wind. Baghra lied that you had no control over your powers, that you practically had none, but you hid from all of us that you are... please don't hide from me anymore. Tell me it's you. The one we've been waiting for so damn long."

"I... you have no idea what you are talking about."

"Eric, please..." You reach out to take his hand in yours, but he moves away from you before your skin can touch for even the slightest moment. He breathes heavily, quickly, shocked to find that his best attempts to keep who he is a secret from everyone have been in vain.

"You don't know anything, Y/N! I am not even Eric; I... I don't know what I am. What you think I am... I am not. I am surely not anyone's saviour. Whatever you saw... you don't know what you have seen. I... forget about it." He mumbles, his eyes wandering on your figure as he decides what to do, what to say to make you change your mind, to make you doubt what you have seen.

You can see the internal struggle in him, as he wants to reach out for you, but at the same time, he is also keeping his distance from you. So seeing his conflict, the panic state he found himself in, all you want to do is soothe him.

"I see you." You interrupt him and cup his cheek in your hand, grounding him for a moment, making him forget everything else as he looks at you. The lump in his throat eases; he feels the tension in his body leave as you stroke his bearded cheek tenderly with your thumb. "I may not know your real name, or the amount of power and responsibility or pain you carry within you... but I know your soul. I know the man you are trying to hide behind your shadows... but I won't allow you. Not anymore."

He instinctively nuzzles his face into your hand. He closes his eyes, unable to bear your sympathetic gaze any longer. He knows he should do to you what he did to all those who came before you: push you away, make you believe he'll disappear forever, go along with his mother's plan, and let you think he died at the hands of the Fjerdans, but... he couldn't. Not with you. Not when you've become involuntarily an important part of his sour heart that's sought your light like grass hidden for months under snow.

He's been alone in the darkness of his shadows for too long. And if letting you in meant breaking him completely... then he thought a few years with you were worth every pain that resulted from the subsequent loneliness.

"Ever since you appeared, I've been running from something deep inside. And it's worse than I feared, because I look in your eyes, and I can't hide. I tried to push you away..."

"Don't push me away." You interrupt him and take a step closer to him.

"But the feelings come back, just twice as strong." He finishes his thought and wraps his hand around the wrist of your hand that’s still caressing his cheek, tangling his other hand in your hair and pulling you closer to him so he can press a kiss to the top of your head. "And I... I don't know what to say." He whispers shakily, closing his eyes and burying his nose in your hair, inhaling your scent like calming salts.

"You know just what to say." You respond in an equally uncertain, tearful tone, holding him tightly against you, not letting him move an inch away from you, not when you finally have him where you need him—pressed against you.

"I do not belong here. I do not belong anywhere. I never did. Every time I find a home, something happens to take that home away. You do not want such a stray like me."

"You are exactly where you should be. The way you feel when you're with me... Beside me... This is the most right… this feels the most right. Please, don't hide from me anymore." You say, slightly pulling away from him to look into his dark eyes.

He tightens his grip on your hair, his gaze on you burning, almost electric as he stares into your eyes as if they were the answer to all his questions and doubts.

You don't know what he finds in them, but they're convincing enough for him to lean slightly toward you, tightening his grip on your wrist and holding your hand against his cheek as if you'd even dared to think for a moment about letting go of him.

He brushes his nose against yours, a hot shiver running through you as you feel his breath on your lips, the beating of his heart speeding up madly, slowly becoming the only thing you can hear. You close your eyes, allowing yourself one quick breath before you lean down and connect your lips in a shy kiss.

He doesn't allow that insult. In an instant he's all over you, wrapping his hand around your waist and pressing you against him. He deepens the kiss, his full lips caressing yours with incredible gentleness and passion as you both moan softly, finally doing what your hearts have longed for for so long.

You start to lose your breath, but that's nothing when you finally feel his hands on you, the warmth of his body so close to you, the taste of his lips that turns out to be so much better than the best candy you sometimes bought at the market. It was addictive, magnetic, the most intoxicating first kiss you've ever experienced. And not because he was the Shadow Summoner, but simply because he was himself—your Eric.

Eventually, you have to pull away. Your lungs are burning, demanding your stolen heart, but they can't find their voice. Your heart is screaming with joy, pure excitement that quickly dies when you open your eyes and meet his worried gaze, the familiar frown of contemplation you've grown to hate over the past few weeks.

Whatever he wants to say dies on his lips as you silence him with another quick, needed kiss. You desperately think about what to say to him, how to convince him to stay with you, and you realise that you have only one good bargaining chip he could be truly interested in—yourself.

"Don't run away anymore. Don't run away from us... from me." You ask him, placing your hand on the side of his neck, moving away just a few millimetres—just so you can look at him properly, begging him not to leave.

"If you knew what I've been doing all these years… what crimes I've committed, what I've been a passive witness to… what I'm capable of… you'd curse me like they all before you did."

"You don't know that. You can't know. We've been waiting for you for so long, Eric…"

"Aleksander." He interrupts you, looking at you thoughtfully. His hand moves to gently cup your cheek as he traces the line of your lower lip with his thumb. "My name is Aleksander." He repeats in a whisper, causing a faint blush to form on your cheeks.

"Aleksander." You test his name on your tongue, and you know from the way his eyes soften and tears well up in them how deeply he is touched by the tenderness with which you say the name he has protected so much. His real name. "That suits you more. Please, Aleksander... Sasha... don't run away this time."

"I..." He’s speechless at the endearing nickname you gave him. All he can do is bury his nose in your hair and pull you closer to him, engulfing you in a desperate embrace as if you’re the one who’s about to run away.

And from the way he strokes your back, the way he breathes in your scent, you know he won't leave you. You've found the Shadow Summoner. Now all you had to do was stay by his side and help him unite Grisha. And while you were at it… you could take advantage of the special care he'd bestowed upon you. For as long as fate would allow.

Thanks for reading this! I hope you enjoyed it. I really appreciate any comments and kudos/hearts if you want to take your time to share your thoughts about this one. Have a nice day/night!! 😊🖤🖤🩵🖤🖤

[yelenasdiary]

https://www.tumblr.com/yelenasdiary/714573048620204032/so-you-know-how-i-dont-post-on-weekends-yeah

HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY!

Maybe a DKOL one shot where Nat decides to take R out to a bar for a lil action and also R doesn’t go out much bc she’s taking care of Dylan or working. All the attention goes to Nat, which she brushes off all the men’s advances. But then one man takes interest in R, but it’s quickly clear he’s being handsy and bold (just a dick and lowk a abusive). It gives R flashbacks to Kane and she starts to have a panic attack, but Nat calms us down. Maybe a lil dark Nat at the end where she “deals” with the guy 😏

I love how deliciously wonderful u balance dark Nat with soft/protective Nat so I would love to see that more!! THANK U HAPPY EARLY BDAY

Drabble || A Little Bit of Fun

Pairing: CEO! MobBoss! Natasha Romanoff x Single Mom! Reader (Platonic)

Summary: Natasha takes you out for a girls night

Angst | Comfort | Mentions of Drinking | Attention from Men, then becomes unwanted attention | Mentions of Violence | Language Warning | 1.4K |  

Notes: A night out with Nat would be so fun! I hope you enjoy this & thank you for the birthday message x So this is so much longer than a drabble lmao, whoops! 

Different Kind of Love Masterlist

"Ready to go?" Natasha asked with a smile causing you to playfully roll your eyes at her, "Come on, don't be like that. Dyl will be fine with Bucky. If anything, Dyl will look after Bucky" Nat added with a chuckle as she grabbed your handbag off the dining table. "Are you sure about this? Clubs and bars haven't really been my thing since I found out about Dylan" you explained while quickly fixing your hair in the mirror. 

"Which is exactly why we're going. Just a few drinks, maybe some dancing, some karaoke and a good time. You've been work a lot, you need a break. Let your hair down" 

You frowned slightly, you never thought that Natasha, your boss for that matter would ever be one for a 'girls night' as they call it. "We'll be back by midnight, right? I don't want Dylan to worry" you turned to Natasha who nodded. 

"Dylan is with Bucky, they are probably playing with his trucks, eating some take out burgers and I wouldn't be surprised if Bucky has Dylan sitting on the sofa with apple juice watching the football game".

"Somehow that doesn't make me feel any better" you bit your bottom lip in worry. 

"Y/n, we are going out. Dylan is safe, he's fed, he's warm and he's in good hands. We are going to have a great time; besides, I could do with the different scenery from the bar at home". 

With a sigh you gave in, grabbing your bag from Natasha's hands and following her out the door of your apartment. 

It had been a good few years since you last went out like this, in fact, the last time was that horrible night that somehow gave you your biggest blessing. Natasha wore a black dress that hugged her figure perfectly and you knew right away that she'd be catching eyes from the moment you both stepped into the bar. You didn't mind though, you found it amusing watching Nat send glares at people who thought they had a chance at buying her drink. 

"Before we go in there, I want you to relax" Natasha spoke as her driver pulled up outside the bar, "I am relaxed" you assured her. A lie. "You're not, you keep checking your phone and your knee won't stop bouncing!" Nat replied as she placed a hand on your bouncing knee. "I'm sorry" you looked at her, "the last time I had a night like this was the night" you admitted. 

"I know, but I promise you, nothing is going to happen. You're with me, as if I'm going to even let anything happen" Natasha's thumb gently stroked the top of your knee. "Promise?" you asked. You just needed her assurance. Natasha nodded, "just give it a chance and if you don't like it, we'll go back to mine and finish the night there" the red head offered. You took a deep breath in and nodded, "okay, let's go have fun" you smiled softly.

----

To your surprise the night was off to a wonderful start, you and Natasha sat by the bartender who wasn't shy of stealing looks of Natasha. Of course, Nat was gaining a fair bit of attention as the night went on, it was a plus for the two of you with the amount of free drinks that were sent to your end of the bar but eventually Natasha was tired of the attention and just sent the men a look that could kill. 

"Alright, tell me" you looked to Natasha as you took a sip of your cocktail, "all these men are basically falling at your knees and you're telling me you're not the slightest bit interested in any of them?" you asked. Natasha chuckled and shook her head, "I'm a lesbian honey, I'm surprised you didn't work that out" she replied before she downed a sip of her own drink. You took a moment to think and suddenly it all made sense to you why she never spoke about a husband, boyfriend or a celebrity crush for that matter. 

"What are we doing at a straight bar then?" you asked. 

"Because I'm not looking for anything, besides, I love the free drinks and disappointment on those men's faces" Natasha explained, "what about you? Have you thought about putting yourself out there a little? Now that Dylan is off to pre-school and all?" she asked.

"I didn't really get a chance to work that out, I guess. I mean, I make out with a few girls when I was in high school and I had a boyfriend at one stage but then Dylan came and I just put all of that to the side" you sipped your drink once more. 

"Why don't you give it ago tonight? That guy over there has been eyeing you all night, lets buy him a drink" Natasha smirked as she waved down the bartender while you glanced over to the tall brunette guy who sent a smile your way. "Nat, I don't know" you mumbled as you shifted your attention back to Natasha. "Too late" Nat playfully winked at you. 

"Hey there, can I get you a drink?" the man's voice spoke from behind you as you slightly turned to look up at him, "I think I bet you too it" you smiled as the bartender handed you a cold beer for you to hand to the gentleman. "Looks like you did" he chuckled, "I'm Noah" he added as he reached his hand out, you took it gently, "I'm Y/n". 

----

Natasha watched from the bar as you finally allowed yourself to have some fun. You danced with Noah, he brought you both some drinks and hadn't failed to make you laugh as the night went on. It wasn't until just before midnight when Noah became rather handsy and tried to coach you to the back seat of his car. You gently pushed him away and shook your head, "No, I'm just here for some fun" you reminded the man. 

"It'll be fun baby, come on. I've done the dancing and pulling jokes, let's just get out of here" he replied as he pulled you closer to him. The strong smell of alcohol sent your mind right back to that night, the cries you let out that were ignored only made matters worse. You tried to break free from Noah's hold, but his strength was too much. "Let me go! please, I said no!" You begged. Natasha saw your struggle and slammed her drink on the bar before storming over to the two of you. 

"Let her go, she said no!" Natasha's voice came to your rescue. Noah looked at Natasha and released his hold of you, "Nothing but a couple of cheap whores!" He spat before walking away. You quickly turned to Natasha in a panic, your breathing quickened, your hands trembled and sweat began to form on your forehead. 

"Y/n, it's okay, he's gone" Natasha spoke softly as she pulled you gently into her arms for a tight hug, "I promised you, nothing was going to happen" she reminded you as she rubbed your back which helped bring your panic attack to a close. She held you until you felt safe enough to pull away. 

"Can we please go?" you asked softly in hopes not to disappoint your friend, she nodded, "I'll walk you to the car then I'll come back and pay the bill" She led you out of the bar following behind you for protection. Once in the car, Natasha reminded you she was just going back to pay the bill she racked up while you were busy and that she'd be back in just a moment. Of course, she told her driver to lock the doors which helped keep you grounded. 

"A couple of cheap whores huh?" Natasha walked confidently up to Noah, "that's what I said, didn't I?" Noah looked the red head up and down before taking a mouthful of his beer. Natasha took this moment to punch the male in the face, the glass in his hand shattering, leaving pieces in his hand and face. 

"You crazy son of a bitch!" he yelled. 

"If I ever see you in here again treating women like meat, I'm going to feed you to a meat grinder then to pigs. I'm not joking, when a woman says no, she means no!" Natasha spoke sternly before kicking Noah in his gentles, "does this cheap whore make herself clear?" she asked as Noah fell to the floor. 

"You're fucking crazy!" he groaned as he covered his manhood. 

"I'll take that as a yes" Natasha replied before walking back to the car.

Taglist: @marvelogic | @randomnessbecausewhynot | @blackwidow-3 | @lilsmeaux | @mmmmokdok | @wandanats-goodgirl | @toouncreativeforausername | @agent99galanzo | @marvelwomen-simp | @its-just-geek | @fxckmiup | @loneliestafterparty | @pikachooo3 | @monaekelis | 

[cocobeanncteez]

ATEEZ San: The Calm After The Storm. (Oneshot)

Genre: angst, fluff, mafia au.

Pairing: Mafia!San x Reader (fem)

Word count: 3.5k

Inspiration: Fifty Shades Freed

Warnings: profanities, alcohol, blood, guns, death, violence.

"What the fuck is this?!" you asked through gritted teeth, throwing the freshly printed photos at San's chest.

Your husband didn't have to look at them to know what you were talking about; his men had already reported to him that you watched the entire recording of him seducing his... target. 

"Babe—"

"No, San!" you yelled, cutting him off. "This is the fifth fucking time!"

"But the other one time wasn't about this."

"The other three, now four times were!" he was really getting on your nerves.

"Why are you overreacting?" he questioned with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Y/N, you knew I had no choice."

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, trying to control your anger. "I understand that you had to seduce her. I know that it's your job," you tried to say calmly, but your voice was rising. "What I don't understand is why you let her slip her fucking hand into your pants after you got the damn information that you wanted!"

San visibly gulped; he didn't expect you to be this angry. He thought he was well prepared to face you after mentally forming the situation in his head. He knew you'd be pissed, but not to this extent.

"I pushed her away though," he mumbled, running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah, after like, five minutes," you retort. "And the worst part was that you were clearly enjoying yourself in those five minutes! Do you know her or something?"

San sighed deeply, ignoring the question. "Babe, look, I'm sorry," he apologized, not sure about what else he could say to calm you down. Your husband took your hand in his. "I won't do it again, I promise."

You immediately ripped your hand away from his, rolling your eyes. "That's what you always say, San." He took a deep breath; you were testing his patience and he didn't like people doing that.

"San," you start, "How would you feel if you saw a guy kissing me and I get carried away and let him touch me?"

That struck him. Hard. He would hate it, obviously. San wouldn't even hesitate to put a bullet through the man's head if he touched you in any way.

San's silence gave you the answer. "That's what I thought," you snorted.

"Y/N, I'm sorry," San apologized again. "But I still had to do it and you know that."

"Whatever," you mumbled and turned around, heading to your room; he still didn't understand just how much it hurt you. It was already worse enough that you had to witness him kiss and touch all those women. But witnessing San let another woman touch him in the place where only you're allowed to, not only pissed you off, but also hurt you deeply. As the seducer of the mafia gang, he was literally trained to not get carried away; his only job was to get whatever information was needed. San was a very, very skilled seducer and you knew that damn well. Although he did get carried away a few times, he never let his targets touch him. So you couldn't understand why he let that happen now. You texted Yunho (your bestfriend and San's close friend) to ask about that woman, knowing that he would never lie to you.

Your anger increased when Yunho replied: "Oh, she hooked up with San a couple of times back in high school." You snorted in annoyance; so he let her touch him just because he knew her?

Your thoughts were interrupted by your phone's notification going off. Your friends were planning to go clubbing tonight as it was a Saturday. You were going to decline, knowing that San wouldn't let you go if he wasn't with you, but you decided against it; you had a plan in mind and you knew it would work.

You ignored San the entire afternoon. He tried to talk to you but you didn't even spare him a glance. He sighed, leaving you alone to cool down.

-

"Where are you going?" San asked, looking at you from head to toe, while your four year old daughter, Minhee, played with some toy aeroplanes.

"Clubbing," you answered without looking at him.

"You're not going anywhere," San said through gritted teeth. "Especially not wearing that." You were wearing denim shorts and a black lace bralette that showed off your cleavage more than you'd usually prefer. You purposely chose this outfit, of course, and he knew that.

"You don't get to decide where I go and what I wear," you stated. You walked over to your daughter, placing a kiss on her head. "Minnie," you called her by her nickname. "Mommy will be back soon, okay?" you said to your little angel before walking out the door.

-

"Y/N! You finally came!" one of your friends yelled, already drunk. She takes your hand and drags you through the crowd of people to get to the bar on the other side. "Three tequila shots for my friend here!"

A while later, you noticed Wooyoung and Mingi at the entrance of the club; you knew San would end up here as soon as he asks Seonghwa or Hongjoong to look after your daughter for the night.

And you were right.

San entered the club, dressed in all black, looking fucking hot. You wanted to go up to him and ask him to fuck you till you see stars; however, you were still pissed and had a plan to execute.

You quickly downed your shots and pulled your friend to join your other friends who were dancing. You danced with them until one of your friends introduced you to some random guys. One of the guys, who you found really good looking, started to dance with you. You noticed San sitting on a barstool, watching everything. At that moment, the guy you were dancing with put his hands on your waist, pulling you close to him, making San nearly break the glass he was holding. Perfect. Your plan was working.

When you glanced at where San was seated, he wasn't there anymore. You glanced around, searching for him until you felt a hand wrap around your wrist, dragging you away.

San dragged you downstairs where there were private rooms especially for him and his gang members as they owned this club. He took you to the room belonging to him, locking the door behind him.

"What the fuck were you doing?! How could you let him even lay a finger on you?!" your husband snarled through gritted teeth.

You snorted. "All he did was put his hands on my waist. At least he didn't slip them into my pants and touch me."

San now understood exactly why you did that; you were giving him a taste of his own medicine.

You moved to sit on the sofa, your legs starting to hurt from dancing so much. San kneeled down in front of you, placing his hands on the bare skin of your thigh. "Babe, I'm sorry. I'm an asshole, I know. But please understand that chick meant nothing to me. I didn't even know her."

You pushed his hands away from you. "Don't lie to me."

"I'm not lying," he lied.

"You hooked up with her in high school," you deadpanned.

"Fuck," he muttered under his breath. He just fucked up again. "Y/N, I didn't mean to—"

You stood up from the couch. "No, fuck you, I'm done with you and your fucking bullshit," you snarled angrily, cutting him off, before making your way back to your friends.

"They might take this route instead, we can't predict what they'll do," Jongho said while moving around the meeting room; he was in charge of today's meeting on some mafia gang who had tried to hack into your gang's system to get information on your international drug deals.

During the meeting, your daughter's nanny called you. You declined the call, sending her a text that you were in a meeting. She called again and you ignored it, thinking she wouldn't have seen your message. When she called for the third time, you excused yourself from the meeting.

"I'm in a meeting, Jina, what is—"

"Mrs. Choi," she sobbed. "T-They took Minnie..."

"What?! Who?!" you felt your stomach churn uneasily.

"I-I don't know," Jina cried, "They beat me up at the park till I passed out and t-took her away. They said they would c-contact you."

"Where are you?" you asked.

"At a nearby hospital," she said. "An old couple brought me here."

"I'll be there in five," you said and hung up. You were just about to enter the meeting room, but an unknown number called you. You picked up, assuming it was your daughter's kidnappers since you never got calls from unknown numbers.

"You have a beautiful daughter, Choi Y/N," the man said. "I bet she would look even better with a slit throat, yeah?"

"Who are you? What do you want?" you asked, voice laced with venom.

The man chuckled. "It's simple, your fucking gang has to pay for my loss."

"Just tell me what the fuck you want!"

"Fifteen billion won in cash," he said. "That's the amount I lost because of you motherfuckers. Now listen to me carefully if you don't want your precious child dead. You aren't going to tell anyone about this. Not a word to your boss, Kim Hongjoong. Not a word to your pathetic husband, Choi San. I have eyes watching you, so don't try to act smart. I know you're having a meeting right now about a gang who tried to hack into your system." your eyes widened; how the fuck does this guy know? "I'm giving you three hours," he continued. "If you don't get the money within that time, I'll kill your daughter. Anyway, you'll find a black van waiting for you outside the bank. Your time starts now, Mrs. Choi. Tick tock, tick tock," he chuckled before hanging up.

"Fuck!" you yelled, tears spilling from your eyes. You ran your hand through your hair, trying to calm down; you felt like breaking down but you had to stay strong for your daughter. You wiped your tears before making your way back to the meeting room.

"I'm sorry, I'm feeling quite unwell," you mumbled, quickly collecting your stuff. "Please continue without me."

"Y/N, should I take you home?" San asked; you both still haven't made up from the fight you had a week ago. He tried to talk to you a few days ago, but it resulted in a bigger fight.

"No!" you half-yelled in frustration, startling some of the people in the room. "I'm fine," you said in a softer tone. You quickly left before San could follow you.

-

"Ah, Mrs. Choi, how can I help you?" the bank manager asked, taking a seat across you.

"I need fifteen billion won in cash," you stated, stunning the manager.

"Ma'am, that is a very large amount so cash isn't the best—"

"I need it in cash. It's really urgent," you said in an annoyed tone.

He gulped and nodded. "Please give me your national ID card."

You handed it to him, fiddling with your fingers while he entered your details into the computer system.

"You have a joint account with your husband, Choi San, correct?"

"Yes."

"Ma'am, we will need Mr. Choi's confirmation as he is the primary account holder."

You mentally cursed. "That won't be necessary," you stated, trying to control your anger.

The manager sighed. "All right, please give me a moment," he said before leaving the room.

You groaned in frustration, putting your head in your heads. You couldn't imagine what your little daughter was going through; you knew she would be scared to death. Your phone rang, interrupting your thoughts.

You declined the call when you saw it was your husband. When he called again, you had no choice but to pick it up, knowing he would keep calling you. "Hello?"

"Y/N, what are you doing? Why are you making such a huge transaction?" San questioned. You mentally cursed the bank manager for contacting San. "Y/N, answer me! What's wrong?" You just kept quiet, knowing you'd break down if you opened your mouth. You heard San take a deep breath. "Are you leaving me or something? Is this about the fights we've been having? I'm sorry about that, I know it was my fault and I don't deserve you, but please, let's talk about this," he begged, making your tears spill from your eyes. "Y/N, say something, please. Tell me what's wrong."

"I can't," you whispered, choking on a sob.

"Baby, please," he begged. "Don't leave me. Please, I'm begging you."

"I'm sorry, San."

There was silence on his end before he sighed. "Okay, take all the money you want," he said and hung up.

A moment later, the manager came into the room. "Ma'am, Mr. Choi has given his permission for the transaction. The procedure for huge cash transactions are of course different, so I need you sign a few papers and write a cheque. It'll take a little over half an hour to get the money in cash."

-

As soon as you got the cash, you called your daughter's kidnappers. "I assume you've got the money?"

"Yeah," you replied.

"Good. You'll see a black van from across the entrance of the bank," he said and hung up.

You quickly made your way outside, easily spotting the van. You crossed the street and got into the van.

You couldn't recognize the driver and the other man in the passenger seat. Your daughter wasn't even here.

"Good job, Mrs. Choi," the man in the passenger seat said with a smirk; you recognized him as the guy on the call.

"Where's my child?"

"Relax," he grinned. "We're going to her right now." He glanced at the driver who nodded and started driving.

"Ah, give me your phone," the man said. "We don't need your husband tracking us." You hesitantly gave it and he switched it off.

After what felt like hours, you reached an old building. As soon as you got outside the car, you spotted your daughter tied to a wall, unconscious with a bleeding head.

"Minhee!" you yelled, running to her.

Before you could untie her, you felt an arm go around your neck, choking you. Even though you were trained to fight, you weren't the best at it. Nevertheless, you tried to free yourself. You kicked the man in the shin, making his grip around you loosen. You took that opportunity to bite his hand before turning around, punching him in the face. You kept punching him until two other men grabbed you. You managed to get one of them injured by repeatedly kicking his private area, but the other guy one was too strong. He easily picked you and threw you onto the concrete floor, making you bang your head and knee. You groaned in pain, feeling a warm liquid running down your face. You pushed yourself to get up despite the excruciating pain you felt. His gun was pointed at you while he smiled. "Have a great time in hell, Choi Y/N."

Suddenly, a gunshot was heard and the man dropped his gun, clenching his hand in pain. A few more gunshots were fired at him, instantly killing him.

"Y/N!" you heard San scream. He picked you up in his arms bridal style, and you got a glimpse of his teary eyes.

"Min-Minhee," you murmured, struggling to keep your eyes open.

"Seonghwa's got her" was the last thing you heard before everything went black.

You slowly opened your ears, squinting due to the bright light. When your eyes adjusted, you realized you were in Yeosang's mini hospital at your gang's mansion. You turned your head to the side, spotting your husband reading some documents.

"San," you murmured, but it wasn't loud enough. "San," you raised your voice a little, coughing due to your extremely dry throat.

San immediately turned to you, eyes widening. "Y/N!" He quickly poured you a glass of orange juice since that was the first thing he saw. He helped you drink the juice, feeling so relieved to see you finally awake.

"How are you feeling, my love?" he asked, taking your hand in his.

"Where's Minhee?" you asked, panick clear in your eyes.

"Minnie is playing with Jongho and Yunho," San said, making you sigh in relief that your daughter was alive. "She's doing well. She got a few stitches, but it's healing quickly. Our daughter is very brave."

Your eyes teared up. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you about—"

"Shh, don't," he cupped your cheek. "I understand why you did what you did, babe. I would've done that too. Anyway, we wiped out that entire gang and got the money back."

"What happened? How did you find me?"

"We killed all the four men and the other three who were hiding. One of them ran away to Japan, but Wooyoung and Mingi went there and killed him," San explained before getting a little nervous. "And um, don't be mad, but I put a tracker on your necklace."

You narrowed your eyes at him. "Hey, see, it proved to be helpful!" he said, putting his hands up defensively.

Before you could reply, San placed his hand over your mouth. He took a deep breath while a wide smile spread on his face. "I also have some good news."

"What's the news?" you asked, voice muffled due to San's hand on your mouth. He opened his mouth to reply, but the door burst open, revealing your daughter.

"Mommy!" she squealed, running to your bed, trying to get onto the bed that was too high for her.

San picked his daughter up, placing her beside you. "Be careful, angel. Mommy is still recovering." The little girl nodded at her father before looking at you.

"How you feel, mommy?" she asked.

"Much better, now that you're here," you replied, tickling her chin. Your daughter giggled, moving away from you. She placed her little hands on your stomach.

"Come out fast so that we can play!"

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion before you glanced at San. "About that..." he chuckled, taking your hand in his. "We're having another baby. You're pregnant."

"W-What?" you gasped in shock. You and San had been trying to get another child for quite sometime now.

"Yeah," he giggled, kissing the back of your hand. "You're almost a month long and the baby is perfectly fine."

Happy tears streamed down your face while your hands moved to your stomach. San kissed your head before pulling away a little. "I know I've been getting on your nerves a lot, but thank you for blessing me with Minhee and now another baby," he mumbled. "I love you so much, my beautiful wife." He crashed his lips onto yours. You kissed him back, smiling into the kiss.

"Eww!" your daughter squealed in disgust. "I'm going to tell uncle Jongho that you're kissing!"

San pulled away with a giggle before lifting his daughter into his arms, placing kisses all over her face while she squirmed around, laughing loudly.

You lovingly watched the two of them with a large smile on your face, and you couldn't wait for the future when your new baby would arrive, adding more happiness to your and your family's lives.

[stylistiquements]

Day 1 : Soap Bubbles.

𐐪𐑂 Pairing : Sapnap x fem!reader {Playlist}

𐐪𐑂 Summary : You're being introduce to the internet in a peculiar way, it's up to you to decide what you're going to do with it.

𐐪𐑂 Word count : 1.4k | W: written part underneath

𐐪𐑂 Warning : very few swears

Masterlist | Previous | Next

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

The coffee that sinks inside your stomach brings out a grimace and a click of your tongue where the taste stains; too bitter, too acidic but you’ll drink it anyway and to the last drop; there is something about the idea of spending time with three best friends that is so made of spring and honey that you wish to miss none of it.

“Someone is lurking,” George contemplates out loud, and the call goes silent for a second as if to look for the intruder. And it would so easy to flinch, to hit the back pedal, because you almost feel like one being exposed front stage like that. But today- today is not that day.

It's not that you don't want to join the discussion, it's that it takes a second to warm up, to absorb the energy and become one with it.

And sometimes, all it takes is Sapnap to exclaim, “Panini head, my beloved!” for your smile synchronizes with his chuckles. Somehow, once noticed by the right person, life flows back naturally.

George and Dream greets you in trailing unison, like two kids forced to greet their unwelcomed aunt on a sunday afternoon.

“H-hey troublemakers,” you finally say. Your voice is still quiet, not reluctant, but rather uncertain. It doesn't bother anyone.

“I’m beating Dream’s ass at chess and he’s bitter,” Sap explains, and you silently nod, as if they were able to see you.

A long silence follows along, rythmed by clicks of mouses and keyboards and it falls in your ears like high droplets. It's comfortable. It's intimate, shared with friends only.

"We haven't heard from you in a while," Dream says. "I mean ... before the clout fiasco."

You wouldn't exactly call it a fiasco, even though you don't really like the idea of being perceived a little too closely from the eyes of twitter.com, but you do agree anyway, "I've been caught up on college essays lately."

"That sucks," George probably adds.

“Good thing you’re here, then,” Dream notes, simple as a breath. “This is a worry-free zone.”

It hovers for a second, carried by George’s approval hum.

You squint suspiciously, detective mode, at the profile pictures that light on and off before your eyes, “Thanks, dream.”

He scoffs a “sure” and you’re not sure why you sense a bit of irony stuck on the back of his teeth. You're so tempted to call him out, but you don't. Instead, you write a mental note of this odd moment.

“It’s because I told him about your three brothers and now he’s scared they’re gonna find him and kick his ass,” Sap explains as if he just read your mind.

Sometimes, there’s this thing in the air, though you’re miles away. Something like a connection. There’s this thing when you don’t need to talk for Sap to understand. Sharing one brain cell, you dismiss ironically. Probably coincidences and predictability, but it always sounds a little special, a little like something you’d wish to be out of this world, like morning dew and fairy circles. And it makes you feel safe, at home, just like snuggling up in the sheets during a stormy night. Your smile washes up the sleeve of your hoodie, covered palm carefully hiding your chuckles.

“Three older brothers,” George muses, and there’s no telling if it’s something meant for you to hear. “That’s kinda scary.”

“You better be scared, one of them is probably your FBI agent,” you tease mindlessly, though there's nothing scary about those three grown men.

“I’m British, Bunny,” he points out. Whether the exasperation in his tone is fake or genuine, that, you can’t tell, but you play it cool, grin carved so deep it almost hurts. Dream’s wheezes rise and fall in the background.

“Say that to his face then,” you outbid smirkingly after a second of silence, heels growing into the carpet to make your chair spin slowly left and right, so breezily.

“I’d praise you for the rest of my life if you-Oooooooh your ass is wacked. Your ass is so wacked, dude. You fucked up so bad,” Sapnap chokes out between strings of giggles.

“Oh no, my streamer is losing his game?” You theatrically pout. “My streamer Dreamwastaken, have you met him? Guess you don’t need any of my brothers to kick your ass.”

“Okay yeah- no- it’s not my fault if your- they’re distracting me, okay?” Dream defends.

Slowly, the energy lowers again and the call remembers peace as Dream admits defeat.

“I’m not playing against you anymore,” he mumbles through greeted teeth, your hoodie shelters a muffled giggle. “Let’s talk about y/n’s twitter fame instead.”

“Let’s just not-” you mutter, both because seeing Dream lose at something is a miracle that has to be witnessed once and because you’re somewhat reluctant. “Let’s just not talk about that.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I had no idea it would draw this much attention to you,” Sap admits.

“Well, you talk about her all the time it was only a matter of time before twitter finds out,” George taunts and you secretly smile, listening to the way your best friend tries to defend himself, mind flooded with the last memories you have of when you were able to see those chuckles for real.

“Yeah, Quackity already told me you guys talk behind my back,” you fakely muse. “That’s totally fine, I don’t wanna know what you guys are talking about at all.” It’s a lie, obviously, the idea creeps upon your mind with assumptions you can’t quite get a grip of nor let go.

“You and Quackity talk?’ Sapnap asks, hint of surprise, and you hum.

“Or rather, he talks to me. He keeps calling-.” Shit. The forsaken word traps itself into your mouth. It’s too silly anyway.

“Come on, just say it,” Dream pushes as if he knew too much, more than you even do, and your cheeks flush mindlessly. You don’t notice.

“Dream, quit it!” You demand.

“Quit what?”

“You talk as if you knew more than anyone did.”

“Maybe I just do,” he coos, so dream-like.

Oblivious or careless, Sapnap asks, “Is Quackity bothering you or something?”

“He-" you begin but stop to look for the right way to put it, "He triggers my flight or fight response.”

"I mean, duh," Sapnap probably rolls his eyes.

"But I like him. He's funny."

After a second of silence, George says, “Well that was unexpected.”

“Not so much, I think we’re both chaotic neutral people.”

“What is that neutral chaotic thing anyway?” Dream is confused.

Roll up your sleeve girl boss because now is your time to shine! You offer your best dream smp alignment chart to the classroom. They're speechless, but they listen carefully.

"Then you're more chaotic good than neutral. You're too sweet anyway," Sap says.

"I'd even say lawful good," George debates.

"That's because you haven't seen Bunny during her crazy cat hour."

"True," you note.

"She'll go absolutely batshit."

“What?" George burst between confusion and surprise. "We've never seen you like that."

"A lady never reveal her secrets," you retort. No one answer.

It leaves a second for your mind to enjoy peace. For your eyes to lay on c!tubbo on lawful good and think true, then on c!dream on chaotic evil and think also very true. You huff and it's like a wave; as sarcasm leaves your breath, an idea comes in.

"Sap, check your DMs," you request.

Surrounded by the evening lull, Sapnap’s laugh pops like soap bubbles, "God, you’re so stupid. Why can't you just marry me?"

“So, is it Sapnap approved?” You chuckle lightly to prevent Sapnap’s morning fresh laugh to fill your chest and leak everywhere.

“Just press ‘send tweet’ please,” he confirms with leftovers of a smile in his voice.

"George, get me out of here. They're doing it again," Dream whines.

"Doing what?" He asks, unbothered.

"Act like they're alone in the convo. Just get a room." And you don't get to stand up for yourself that you and your best friend are actually sent to another room.

"Well this one is chaotic evil confirmed," you mumble as you roll your eyes but the vibes are much peaceful, much more comfortable in here. "So ... hi."

"Hi," he chuckles in return.

Maybe that's for the best; a moment that needs to stay a little timeless, secretive and special. It hasn't happened in so long, you don't even remember the last time it did.

"I'm glad you're here. I miss you, you know?" He says, and it's hard to not feel so bittersweet about it. It's hard when longing involves a craved touch, a real smile and an eye contact. Your shoulder sinks in the chair a little harder.

"I miss you too. I'll be here soon," you promise. And soon couldn't come any sooner.

But the conversation, soft and free, will wash up any worries, as always, and you'll end up talking about everything and nothing, about streams and planned videos and college and god knows what. As long as it makes the two of you happy and smiling. Just like the old days, you'll both think and it's fair to say until the evening turns into night and night turns into fatigue.

"Are you sure you're okay about that clout?" He asks once again. "I know you don't like being exposed like that."

"Yeah, yeah don't worry too much about it. I'll try to make good use of it."

"I'm sure you will," he murmurs, but oh boy did he not know what was about to come until you two meet.

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

Taglist : @open-minded-chip-101 ; @itsoakaa ; @gaysludge

A/N : so first of all it has come to my attention that 129 days from now on is actually my birthday so that's a weird coincidence lol. Hi how are you guys?? welcome to the first part I hope you liked it. I'm fairly new to the mcyt community and that's the first time I write for them, so bear with me. Feedbacks are always appreciated. Until next time (ɔˆ ³(ˆ⌣ˆc)

[lovemychoices]

Always Be My Driver - A RoD Rom-Com [Colt x MC/Logan x MC]. CH 5

Book : RIDE OR DIE

PAIRING : Colt x MC/ Logan x MC

SUMMARY: Emma and Colt have been childhood best friends since forever, they were both inseparable. In middle school they became something more but when Colt had to move with his mom away from LA all the way to Miami, things started to change between them. A small misunderstanding leads to the end of their relationship. 6 years later they meet again at the most unlikely place. Will Emma and Colt be able to mend what has been broken between them? Or will it continue to crash and burn?

Characters except my OCs belong to Pixelberry, I am just borrowing them

Word count : 3262

Chapter Summary: All secrets eventually come to light.

A/N : Posting from my phone so like tag this under #long post. Sorry for any grammatical errors! I didn’t really have the time to double check my work.

Warning : I’m rating this PG18 cause there will probably be PG18 stuff that’s going to happen in future chapters. So if you read this series you acknowledge that.

Catch up with the series HERE

Dear Diary,

It’s been a few days since that night in Colt’s room and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him. Do I still have feelings for him? Does he still have feelings for me?

Emma shakes her head at the thought.

Gosh I feel like the worst girlfriend ever, I have the best boyfriend in the world, who loves and trusts me. Yet here I am thinking about if Colt Kaneko still has feelings for me. With everything that’s been going on I’ve been debating whether or not I should come clean and tell Logan about it.

*****

Emma stands in front of her vanity mirror putting on the finishing touches of her make up. She and Logan had plans to go out tonight, it was their fourth double date with Riya and Darius and she couldn’t wait to hangout with them, especially if it meant she could get Colt off her mind.

The door to the loft opens and she beams when she sees it Logan walking in. “Hey beautiful, I haven’t seen you all day.” He murmured in a low husky voice while wrapping his arms around her waist and slowly tracing kisses down her neck. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.”

Emma Lets out a soft giggle. “But we just saw each other this morning.”

“Has it been that long already?”He continues to nip the side of her neck.

“Mmm... Logan .. Our friends are expecting us at the movies, we’re going to be late if you keep distracting me like this.”

“They can wait.. Right now I need you.” He slowly unties the knot on her robe, letting it fall to the floor leaving only her lingerie on. He spun her around and lifts her on top of the dresser, immediately capturing her lips in a heated kiss.

Emma wraps her leg around his waist, running her hand through his hair, a soft moan escapes her as she feels his warm lips pressed on her bare skin. “Logan, bed now.” She whimpers and he gave her a mischievous grin.

He swiftly lifts her up and carries her to the bed, gently throwing her on the mattress. He quickly takes off his shirt and jeans before getting on top of her. Emma pulls him in for a hungry kiss as Logan’s hand slowly traces tantalizing motions from her jaw then her breast all the way inside the waistband of her laced panties.

“Oh Logan..”

BAM! The door swings right open. Emma immediately pushes Logan off the bed and he falls to the hardwood floor with a loud thud. She grabs the blanket covering her half naked body.

“What the fuck Mona, don’t you knock? People are half naked over here!”

Mona snorts. “Oh please if I see something I haven’t seen before, I’ll throw a dollar at it.”

“What do you want, Mona?” Logan scowls.

“Boss wants to see you before you go out. I suggest you put on some pants before you do.” She grins.

Logan rolls his eyes at Mona before gathering his scattered clothes off the floor. He puts his jeans and shirt back on then heads out the door.

“Piece of advise Em, next time you and pretty boy over there are having at it, make sure you lock the door first. Wouldn’t want the wrong person barging in.”

*****

At the movies Emma and Riya stares at a poster that’s currently featured on the wall. Both the ladies were waiting for the guys to buy their popcorn and drinks. “Is it just me or does Matt Rodriquez looks like he doesn’t age?” Emma admiringly said with her arms crossed.

“I think he could be in his 50’s and still look like his in his late 30’s” Riya replied then turns to see if the guys were done but someone else catches her eye. “Um.. Emma, is it just me or does that guy over there remind you of Colt Kaneko?”

Emma’s breath hitched when she heard his name. Maybe Riya is mistaken, she hasn’t seen him in like forever. Emma slowly turns to where Riya is looking her eyes go wide. Holy Crap, it’s really him. What the hell is he doing here? “Emma are you alright?” But Riya’s words go unheard as she stomps over towards Colt.

“Colt? What are you doing here?”

Colt gives a half shrug. “Why else would someone go to the movies?”

“Wait, why does it sound like the two of you have already met before?” Riya asks with a confused look on her face.

“Well yeah, it’s hard not to run into each other when you live and work under the same roof.” Colt replies then arches an eyebrow at Riya. “I thought you knew?”

Emma closes her face with the palm of her hand, in the weeks since Colt arrived she didn’t mention any of it not even once to Riya during their calls or when they texted.

“Oh really?” Riya turns to Emma quirking an eyebrow at her. “Huh.. Must have slipped my mind.”

A few seconds later a young petite brunette approaches Colt and hooks her arm around his. “Sorry for keeping you waiting, the line at the restroom was just a total nightmare.” She smiles, turning her attention to Emma and Riya, eyeing them from head to toe. “I’m sorry'' Who are you?”

Colt gently slips his arm out from the brunette before introducing them. “Jean, this is Emma and Riya. Their friends of mine back when I lived in LA. Emma and Riya meet Jean, she also goes to MIT.”

“Ah so you two go to school together?” Emma chimes in. “Are you here for summer break?”

“Only for a few days.. Colt promised he’d show me around if I was ever in town.” She replies, looking fondly at Colt. “He sort of owes me after helping him with his robotics project last semester.”

“Well I’m sure you’ll have lost of fun if Colt’s your tour guide.” Emma gives Jean a gingerly smile before giving Colt a look. I hope you fall and hurt yourself, you asshole!

Just then Logan and Darius saunter towards the group holding two large buckets popcorn and a few soft drinks. When Logan notices Colt, he glares at him. “What are you doing here?”

“Not here to see you, if that’s what you’re implying” He answers in a disdain tone then turns to Darius. “Darius, haven’t seen you in a while.”

“Colt Kaneko? it’s been so long! Man I’d give you a hug but my hands are tied.” He gestured to the tub of popcorn and drinks in his hand. “How long have you been in town?”

“Okay! While I’d love to see where this reunion is going, don’t forget we have a movie to catch which starts in like 2 minutes.” Emma quickly interrupted. If she had to be in the same place as Colt and his date she’d just lose it. This couldn't get any worse. But she spoke too soon, turns out Colt and his date were watching the same movie too and they were seated right in front of her and Logan. She couldn't keep her eyes off Colt and Jean the whole time, she practically almost missed the first half of the movie. What was it that was bugging her so much?

Halfway towards the end of the movie, Emma sees Jean slowly cozying up to Colt and she didn't know what came over her next but she abruptly gives a strong kicks on Colt's Chair making a thud sound startling him and his date. They both turn to look at her with their eyebrows raised while Logan eyes her suspiciously. "Sorry… I got excited from the scene." She said dryly.

Colt whispers something into his date's ear then shortly after he gets up and walks out of the theatre. Emma anxiously taps her fingers on the arm of the chair. Where does he think he's going?! "Hey I’m out of milk duds." She lied.

“Want me to go out and get some more?”

“No, I’ll get them myself. I need a quick run to the ladies room anyway.” She said giving him a chaste kiss before going out. Emma scans around the hall to see where Colt went. When she does she quickly follows him not realizing where he went. "What do you think you’re doing?!”

"Christ! Emma what are you doing in here?!" Colt jumps up, quickly zipping his pants. "You do know this is the men's room right?"

Holy shit! He's right! It's alright you've been in more humiliating situations before. "Don't change the subject, why are you following me?"

"Uh…I’m not the one in the mens room?" He gives her a sly grin. "What’s this really about, Emma?"

“I.. I don’t know what you mean.” She mumbled nervously with her eyes downcast. Colt scoffed. “You know exactly what I mean.. Did you think I wouldn't notice you intentionally kicking the back of my head just as things between me and Jean were getting comfy? Just admit it Em, you’re jealous.”

Don’t let him get to you. “As if…” She replied with a scoff. “I see something’s haven’t changed, Colt. You’re still as narcissistic as ever.”

“And you still can’t lie to me even if your life depended on it.” He retorts, stepping closer towards her. She could feel her heart pounding as he stands right in front of her, their body’s barely an inch away from each other. Once again they found themselves in the same position as the night before, both gazing into each other’s eyes with a sense of longing and their lips only one move away from a kiss. Do it already, just kiss me.

Colt takes one more step forward slowly leaning in, Emma could feel her heart pounding fast. She closes her eyes ready for what's about to come when she hears the sound of something being pulled out. She opens her eyes and see Colt taking a few pieces of toilet paper from the dispenser behind her. “You were in the way.”

She immediately felt her cheeks flush but tries to hide how embarrassed she was. “Okay.. So I need to go back to the movie before my boyfriend who I love very much gets worried.” She turns on her heels and bites her tongue hoping he wouldn’t notice that she thought he was going to kiss her because the last thing she needed was to be humiliated by Colt.

****

After the movies Emma, Logan, Riya and Darius continued their double date for dinner at a new korean restaurant. They were greeted by a waitress who started taking their orders. “Emma what are you going to order? Logan asked.

But Emma was too busy paying attention to her phone, stalking Colt’s date on pictagram to bother with everyone else around her. So she goes to MIT with Colt and She’s a sophomore. Originally from Boston. Urgh.. She’s a cat person! Well that would never work because Colt’s allergic to cats, plus he’s a dog person just like me. A new picture pops up on her pictagram. No he didn’t is that Barry’s Ice Cream shop? He took her to our favorite ice cream shop! Wait there is no reason to be jealous you’ve taken Logan there plenty of times.

“Earth to Emma!” She finally snaps out of it Her thoughts.“Huh what?”

“It’s your turn to order..” Riya glares at her.

“Oh right um.. So I’ll have the bulgogi and kimchi fried rice and some green tea.” She tells the waitress and hands her back the menu, when she looks around the table everyone is staring at her in a curious way. “What? Do I have something on my face?”

“No but are you okay? You’ve been acting weird since we left the movies?” Logan asks with a concerned look on his face. “I’m fine..” She sputters. “I need to use the restroom.. Excuse me one moment.”

“I just realized I need to use the restroom too.” Riya said following Emma from behind. When they reach the washroom Emma lets out a loud growl while Riya gives her a questionable look. “Okay what’s going on?” She crosses her arms. “You’ve been acting all weird since we saw Colt at the movies. Which by the way, you didn’t mention was back in town and not only that his dad happens to be your boss?”

“It slipped my mind okay? Besides, I didn’t think it was a big deal that I needed to tell you.”

“Not a big deal? Emma, this is not just some other guy you just met. It’s Colt Kaneko we’re talking about. He was your best friend, he was the first guy you ever loved.”

“We.. We were just kids. Those feelings, they were just part of some teenage phase and I’m over it.”

“Oh really?” Riya gives Emma a pointed look. “Is that why you’ve been stalking his date since we left the movie?”

Emma let out a nervous snort. “I have not.”

“Prove it..” Riya gives Emma a challenging stare with her arms folded on her waist. Emma finally admits defeat and tell every single detail that’s been going on since Colt came back and Riya listens intently.

*******************************

Meanwhile back at their table Logan and Darius both gives each other a questionable look as the girl's head to the washroom. “What was that all about?” Darius asks. “Beats me.” Logan snorts

“So I’ve been meaning to ask you, how do you know Colt?”

“Colt? I met him in 7th grade through Emma. They were pretty inseparable as kids all the way through middle school.” He replies and takes a sip of his drink. “I gotta say Logan, I admire you for being the bigger man.”

“For what?” Logan raises his eyebrows.

“Well you know? Because of their history together? They were practically each other’s first love. Colt even gave her this really expensive bracelet he worked hard for during the summer for her birthday.”

Darius words hit Logan like a knife to the heart, he’s asked Emma before if she and Colt were ever more than just friends and she looked him in the eye and lied to his face. But why? Why would she do that? When Darius realizes that Logan had no idea his eyes go wide open. “Oh man, I’m sorry I thought you knew. Crap Emma is so going to kill me and Riya is..”

“Riya is what?” Riya suddenly interrupts as she approaches the booth with Emma following behind her. “What have you boys been talking about?” She asks as they both plopped back on their seats. Darius looks at Logan who subtly shake his head. “N..Nothing.” He sputters. “I was just telling Logan how excited you always get during our double dates.”

“Huh… and here I thought you boys might have some hot gossip.”

“Oh there was alright.” Logan mutters in a barely audible tone. He stayed quiet for the rest of their time at the restaurant only replying not more than three words when being asked a question. All he could think about was how betrayed he felt, if she lied about this what else did she lie about? So many questions and doubts ran through his mind but he wasn’t going to make a scene while Darius and Riya were around. It’ll just have to wait when they get back.

*************

The ride back to the loft was awkwardly quiet, Logan didn't feel like talking after what he found out. Emma could feel the tension like something was bothering Logan, he was perfectly fine before she came out of the restroom after her little chat with Riya.

“So… The food at the restaurant was actually really good.” She said trying to break the silence but Logan just stays quiet. “We should go back there sometime, there’s still so many things I want to try.” But she only got a shrug from him as a reply.

They finally reach the auto shop,normally Logan would have his arms around her and they’d make out abit before stepping out but this time was different, without saying a word Logan immediately exits the car slamming the door behind and stomps straight to the loft. Emma quickly follows him from behind. What’s gotten into him?

“Logan what’s going on? You’ve been quiet all night, it’s not like you.” But he still doesn’t answers, his back still facing her. “Please Logan, talk to me. I’m worried.” She stepped closer to him and places a hand on his arm but he shrugs it off.

After a moment he finally spoke in a weak voice. “I love you Em.”

“And I love you, Logan.”

“Then why did you lie to me about Colt?” Emma takes a step back feeling caught off guard by his question. Shit! “You.. You know? How?”

“Darius accidentally let it slip. How long were you planning on lying to me?” Why did you?” I looked you in the face Emma! I asked you and you lied to me!” He snaps, a hurtful look on his face.

“I… I don’t know.. I guess I was afraid.” She said with her eyes downcast while fidgeting with the bracelet on her hand. Logan had a point why did she lie? She had no reason to, she knew Logan would understand and yet she chose to hide the truth from him.

“Afraid? Afraid of what?”

“You and Colt don’t exactly see eye to eye, I didn’t want to make things worse by letting you know our history. Plus it was all in the past and Colt was bound to leave after summer break.. I just.. Please Logan I didn’t mean to hurt you.” She pleads with tears welling in her eyes, her hand still unconsciously fidgeting with the bracelet that Colt gave her, which Logan noticed and then it hits him. “He gave you that didn’t he? That’s the bracelet Darius mentioned.” Emma stops and gives him a regretful look. “You’ve had that since the day we first met.”

“It doesn’t mean anything, it's just an accessory.”

“When you lost it the other day, you almost went crazy just looking for it. That doesn't feel like just an accessory to me. Just tell me the truth Emma, after all this time do you still love him?”

“I’ve known Colt for almost all my life but I’m with you now and I love you, Logan.” She said stepping towards his to reach for his hand but he swipes it away.

“That’s not an answer, just look me in the eye and tell me the truth for once Emma, are you still in love with Colt?” His was voice stern but his eyes shows a different emotion, sadness.

“I… I don’t … I don’t know.” She sputters as tears start to well in her eyes. Why was it so hard to just say no?

Logan takes a step back, running his hands through his hair while his eyes pointedly looks away. At that moment he could feel his heart shattered into a million pieces but he takes a deep breath and quickly pulls himself together. “I think we need to take a break. I’m going away for a few days for a job maybe a week. We should both just use that time to think about what we really want.” He said and walks towards the door stopping mid way to look over his shoulder. “I’ll be sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight, good night Emma.”

************************************************

Rod - @liamzigmichael4ever @client-327 @brightpinkpeppercorn @lovehugsandcandy @lilyofchoices @rideorparadise @zaffrenotes @queenkaneko @mskaneko @pintsizedelle @flowerpowell @desiree-0816 @emceesynonymroll @kinkykingliam @jlpplays1 @annekebbphotography @thecordoniandiaries @cora-nova @rainbowsinthestorm @princess-geek @leelee10898 @herladyshipxx @emichelle @kimmiedoo5 @dawn-1994 @choicesarehard

[judgement-free-sideblog]

Occupational hazards

Barry Berkman x Reader

Three part series: It was just another job, he doesn't even had to kill anyone, but the way she looked at him was more dangerous than the bullets.

Part I Part II Part III

Angst with a happy ending

Warnings: Violence, cursing, blood, stalkers.

Part II

Adrian's face smiled at you in the mirror, she was a nice looking woman, a few years younger than you, yet ten times more of a functional adult.

"Reservations are at 10:00 for brunch, and your... friend is waiting in the living room" Her voice had an ounce of disgust referring to Barry.

"Great! He is on time, and please don't be so harsh on him, I'll be down in a minute, chat with him, he is nice" She rolled her yes at you and walked out of your room, you knew she meant well and it made you happy having someone that caring around, even when this time you have lied to her about the true nature of your relationship with Barry.

You finished fixing up your hair and put on the summer dress you had picked up for you date it was the middle of June and it felt nice to have a reason to leave the house well dressed beside the fear that one of the many paparazzi lurking around would get a picture and sell it to a magazine with a stupid title.

And on the other hand even when you don't want to admit it, you were desperate to spend more time with Barry, you were not sure if he changed his mind out of pity, ambition or if he genuinely wanted to help you, but there was something about him so interesting you just needed to know more.

"You look beautiful" His del voice and the compliment take you by surprise "Shall we?" Even when chivalrous things like offering his arm like that or opening the car dormant nothing to you, it felt nice coming from him. "There was a bug in your living room, in the lamp next to your couch" He said once you were inside changing his voice back to the monotone he had used the day before and you felt a bit disappointed that his flattery was a lie.

"You know what? You are fired I'm going to kill him myself" You said jokingly, shaking that feeling away "How on earth did that psycho put a microphone in my house? I'm going to destroyed that shit the minute I get back" you started driving faster without noticing, the road helped to calm your nerves.

"Oh that that won't be necessary" He said showing you the small device crushed in his palm. "I crushed before Adrian could see"

"Then what you said earlier..." You started confused.

"That was a compliment, do big actresses don't receive those anymore?" He asked and youu could see a small grin on his face.

"So you met Adrian?" You better change the subject before things get complicated.

"I did, how much exactly did she knows? She send me an email with your address, and a few notes about places you like to go and stuff like that but she didn't mention anything else" He was looking at the road and you suspected he haven't see this side of L.A. before.

"Well, she knows I'm from Columbus, so I told her you were a childhood friend that came to work here as an extra in a movie I had a small role in, that we reconnected over emails and that now we wanted to explore more of that feelings" a complete fabrication but she had believed it and that made you feel worst about lying.

"I'm from Cleveland, but that would do. So you finally didn't tell her the truth?"

"I couldn't, you were right, is better if less people know" you were already at the restaurant so you allowed the valet to take away your car and you took his hand cautiously waiting for a reaction but he didn't pull away and just started walking in "How did your boss take it? That you end up taking the job?"

"Fuches is not my boss" He said again exasperated, just what you intended, there was a cute frown on his forehead when he do that "And he is happy, he didn't want to work with you either, so now he can ignore the whole thing and simply change his work number."

"A true dream that guy huh?" Even whit the heels you have to look up to him every time you talked to him.

"He is... terrible" He said after struggling to fine a compliment for Fuches "But just like you feel about Adrian, he is family." He talked low so only you could listen and you both walked behind the waitress to your table, in the open area of the restaurant. He opened the chair for you and wait for the waitress to walk away to ask a question that clearly was trying to get in the conversation since earlier "This Maverick guy, is he dangerous? Did he ever beat you or..."

"Or?" You said rising a brow but he couldn't get the words out "He is not that stupid, he wouldn't do anything that could physically incriminate him, but he was rough in verything, I really don't like to talk about it". Your palms were sweaty and the knot on your chest start tightening.

"I'm sorry" He said seeing your obvious discomfort "Is just that I have a friend, and I think she is working with him"

"A friend?" You asked very interested and it was his turn to be uncomfortable "Look Barry he is a bad men, I won't sugarcoat it for you, but it all depends on how known she is, he preys on extras and new faces with promises of big parts, but if she has a talking named role he probably would leave her alone."

"She is one of the leads I guess, is that movie of the moms that get divorce and fall for each other?" He said relieved with what you have said.

"Fantastic Richard make a movie to make everyone around him believe he is a feminist and I'm here paying a men to make me look like a decent woman" you said bitterly "Don't worry she would be fine, he would be the most perfect gentleman for everything about that project to cover his ass, your friend is safe" you reassure him and the waitress returned to take your orders, just when you were desperate for a drink.

"Are you ready to order?" She had a big smile with white teeth and bright pink lipstick and you could see her checking out Barry without discretion.

"Two black coffees please" He said before you could speak "I want the mushrooms omelet and the fruit cocktail" He said giving back the cart.

"And you madame?"

"A whites only spinach omelet, thank you" You said and she walked away no without giving one last look at him. "Coffee?"

"Decent women don't drink at 10 am" that actually made you laugh and he was pleased with your reaction "But actually there is somewhere I would like to take you after this and it would be better if you are completely sober" You gave him an intrigued look but he didn't say much else about it.

You eat in a comfortable silence, and you studied his face and his movements, how he keep moving his cup on the table and how he drink never taking the cup by the handle, like it was a glass. Then a loud ring interrupted the moment and you could see your least favorite person name popping up in the screen, you were going to turn the phone off but he took it first.

"Hello?" He said casually "Hi, I'm Barry, who are you?" you couldn't hear the response but you were almost sure he should be mad. "Oh that is not possible, she is very busy at the moment, right sweetheart? Do you want to leave her a message? Oh look he hung up" He give you back the phone and you immediately turned off. "Adorable guy".

"He is going to be pissed" You said with a big smile on your face "Thank you"

After the meal he took the car to drive outside town, there was something relaxing about it, that deserted area away from everyone and everything was definitely a place where nobody will follow and you felt completely safe next to him.

"Fuches told me how you get his number" he said opening the door for you. "And I invited someone here that may be happy to see you again" He said pointing at a man a few yards from you, he was wearing a hat to hide from the sun and a black best, but you could recognize his pale skin almost instantly.

"Hank?" You asked and he start approaching "Oh god is you, I'm so happy to see you.

"Y/N! This is gonna be so much fun, when Barry said he was working with you I was so excited" He said smiling and holding both of your hands.

"Wait a minute what is going to be fun exactly, and do you know each other?" You asked but it was obvious that they did, wich confirmed that NoHo Hank was everything but an ordinary men.

"Of course we know each other, Barry trained my men to be as good as him and take down the Burmeses but then he went crazy and kill them all. But hey! Water under the bridge right Barry?" He talked about murder an mafia the way he talked about color schemes for small rooms, and you could see just how dangerous Barry Berkman's world really was.

"You worked for the Chechen mafia?" You asked Barry.

"As a consultant" He said with indignation "Let's get started, put this on" he said tossing a bag with Gym clothes from Lululemon "I .... I guessed your size" He said a bit embarrassed.

"What exactly are we doing here?" You asked him and looked at the clothes, it was a nice purple sport bra and matching leggings.

"Well your ex is an asswhole, and I'm not that sure this plan of your will work, but since I can't stay at your place all the time to stop him for get close to you, I thought it would be good if you learn to defend yoursel" He said confidently. "Also I made some recon around your house this morning, your window is facing a blindspot on a roof perfect for someone to watch you from there" You remember the insidious calls from Richard and got chills thinking he may have been watching you from so close.

"Decent women don't drink at 10 am" He said sarcastically, making you laugh "I'm kidding, I actually want to take you somewhere else after brunch, and I'll be better if you are completely sober" he said with a playful look on his eyes that was enough to convince you to quit drinking...at least for that week.

You went to a small tent they have set up and put on the work out clothes to start, sadly your physical shape was no match for his, and after what he called just warm up you were sweating and panting. But you felt touch by the gesture, and your heart start holding to the illusion that he may not be doing all this for the money.

"Come on, like you mean it!" He said after you tried to hit him on the groin with your knee but stopped midair not wanting to hurt him.

"Hit him baby! Barry can take it" Hank said cheering you up, he was not actually helpful but it was nice to have him around.

You close your eyes and try to concentrate on Richard, on all the pain he caused you and how much you have sacrificed to get away from him and then you hit him again this time with all your strength, and even when Barry was way stronger he bend with paint for a moment.

"Barry? Oh shit I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" You start looking at him while he still had his hand holding his hurt manhood.

"No, it's fine" He said gasping for air "That was good, now do it to Hank" he said and start laughing watching how Hank went even paler. "Oh fuck that hurt" He said no longer holding his weight and Hank run to help you stand on his feet.

"I think that's more than enough, come on big guy I'll take you home" You said and helped him back in the car. "Thanks man" You said to NoHo Hank and offered your hand but he went for a hug.

"Barry is a good guy, he could be good for you" He whispered in your ear and you nodded with a blush in your face, either you were being obvious or he was just that sensitive.

You drive to your place in silence, except for you asking him every few minutes if he was okay. You helped him to your couch and went to the kitchen to find him some ice and an ibuprofen.

"That went well" He said once you were sitting next to him on the couch and he took the pill "Now make sure you do that if that son of a bitch comes near you"

"You can be sure I will, but seriously apart from probably keeping you from being a father I have a great day" you really meant that, maybe it was the way he looked at you or the way he spoke but he made you feel safe.

"I should leave" He said then putting apart the ice pack, "I have to work in the morning and I'll go to the hospital to make sure I don't have an hernia" He said and laughed at your concerned face "I'm kidding, I'll call you" He stood up and he gave you a handshake but following your instinct you pull him closer to kiss him on th cheek, he didn't move nor say anything but gave you a timid smile and just walked outside.

The peace you felt that night, that would extend for the next month was intoxicating, for the first time in a long time you went to sleep without worrying what would the tabloids were reserving for you in the morning, even when Pop sugar had a vicious article about the "Mysterious man taking Y/N on dates in L.A." the next morning, Barry made you happy, and maybe the only cloud in your sunny day was that your relationship wasn't real, it had an expiration date and a price tag attached to it.

Week after week you tried to keep you from falling for him, forcing you to remember how you actually met, but despite the fact that he was in fact a murderer he was a good man, and even when he called himself a bad actor he was excellent at faking caring for you, at holding you in his arms at the beach and giving you his jacket so you wouldn't get sunburned.

He mastered the art of making you believe he get nervous when he would get at your place earlier than planned and you would be walking around in a see trough sleepwear dress. And you have to force yourself to believe that a tender kiss on your forehead in public was just part of his job and meant nothing because otherwise you would be done when he left.

On the bright side was that people were talking about you two and the insidious calls and the nasty presents and threats have stopped, and since one friend of yours on Variety wanted an actual exclusive on your relationship by mid July you agreed to give her a candid interview about how marvelous your life was since Barry came along.

"Nervous?" You asked him and stop a minute to admire him in his old Marine uniform, you never quite get the kink about it until now, he did look amazing and the unholy thoughts in your mind were about to make you blush, you even had stop smoking to make the lie believable but god you could use one now.

"Not really, it's just weird I haven't use this in years" It was all part of the photoshoot that will go with the interview "Thankfully it still fits"

"You can always take it off and that would get attention too" You wink at him, your more efficient form of coping with your feelings was being extremely flirtatious, at least that way he would think it was a joke.

"Hi, I'm Danielle" the reporter said and shake Barry's hand once he was out of his uniform and you both were siting in a nice couch with the cameras around you. "First I want to say that you guys are a lovely couple, and it's such an honor that you allow this space to talk about it"

"Thank you for having us" strangely you felt actually nervous and when he notice you rubbing your hands together he took it one on his and hold it tight. "With all the things that are out there even when I like to keep my life private I prefer to tell the truth once before it hurt my relationship" You said, as you both have practiced for the last three days, your friend Charlie had been nice enough to send a copy of the questions to Adrian and you have choreographed your answers, now she would asked about how did you meet.

"So Barry tell me, all this media attention have had any negative impact in your life? How do you cope with being called a walking purse, as some headlines had said?" The question came out of nowhere and Charlie that was sitting behind the cameras was looking as baffled as you, and ypu could imagine who may have something to do with this.

Barry stay silent for a second that felt like an hour and then he finally spoke with a composed tone.

"When I first move to L.A. I have this delusional idea in mind of becoming an actor, and I used to think the spotlight was the goal, but then when we started dating I realized how damaging that could be for someone, the amount of pressure people put on women is insane, look ar this beautiful and wonderful women next to me, people should be talking about how great she is acting, how far she has get on her own, and how much she does for her community in her free time, I'm nothing, just an extra in a couple of commercials and a clerk in lululemon. If they want to call me a purse be my guest, nothing would make me happier as long as people give her the recognition she deserves"

If the interviewer was mad she didn't show, but that passionate speech was enough to make her back to the scheduled questions and the rest of the interview went smoothly.

"Well that was interesting" Barry had a sad smile in his eyes when he dropped you at your house "I think I overstepped, I'm sorry"

"Don't be, thanks for having my back, I froze I should have said something". It had make you feel week again and that was hurting you.

"Is fine, well good luck tomorrow" He said referring to the Emmy nominations that would be announced in the morning and that you had actually forgotten about.

"God you are right, well another reason to keep me awake I guess" Your mind formed an idea and you were not able to shake it and since he didn't respond you took your chance and went for it. "Would you like to stay? I mean I'm to anxious to sleep and I have some movies we could watch"

He looked completely taken by surprise, and he went dead silent, for a moment you even feard you have gone too far and that he might be mad at you for saying it.

"I would love to, we can finally watch one of those movies you always talk about" He walked in front of you to get in the house and you followed him more happy than you have ever been.

[jinxthequeergirl]

In The Depths of your mind

Gabriel x winchester!reader

Summary: after your life spirled out of control after Gabriel's seeming death the boys take matters of erasing him from your memory, but of course he comes back and is still in love with you but can't do anything about it

Warning: swearing,angst, probably gets a little spicy towards the end?

This is just a guilty pleasure thing I did for myself, also Blame my friend for making me love this ass again

Also this story? Long as all heck like, And sucks booty but ding dang im sorry.

~~~~~

"Stay still!" You yelled at the angle in front of you. "Ok, ok, I'm sorry!"

You grinned up at him and traced your finger across his palm, causing him to squirm again. "Gabriel!" You dropped his hand and fell back into your bed. "I'm sorry! I swear I won't squirm anymore!"

You laughed and pulled him down with you and kissed him. "You ruined the moment dumbass." you muttered before kissing him again. He frowned after pulling away and rested his chin on your chest.

"Sugar, please? I'm dying to know what my future holds!" You hummed in response and played with his hair. "You know what I think?"

He shifted on the bed next to you and rested his head on your shoulder. "What?"

"I think...the future can wait. It's a beautiful afternoon...and I could really use a nap...so why don't we just live in the moment?"

He smiled as you curled up next to him and shut your eyes. "In order to nap your eyes need to be closed, Angel cake." he chuckled and shut his eyes falling asleep with you.

It was weird that's instantly what he thought of after Sam and Dean told him that after he "died" they had castiel erasie him from your memories, meaning you wouldn't know who he was when you walked in through the door, you wouldn't remember the life he gave you for a little while, and he could do nothing about it.

But it pained him even more to hear about how bad your life had spiraled out after he did so. "Just remeber we don't know what could happen if you bring those memories up unexpectedly, so just be careful..."

He nodded slowly still processing everything.

"Boys I'm home!" you yelled from within the bunker. Gabriel perked up in his seat turning to the doorway where you appeared holding three bags, two bags from KFC and one from the grocery store.

Gabriel stopped when he noticed your hair wasn't it's natural color and it was only then he realiesed only part of what had happened to you after he left.

"You must be the person I spent an extra twenty bucks on." you joked as you set the bags down on the table he was still seated at.

"I'm y/n by the way." he stared up at you as you started unpacking the food. Dean came up behind him and hit him slightly shaking him from his gaze. "Gabriel, nice to...nice to meet you."

You looked at him with a smile. "Well Gabriel, dig in!"

You took a seat next to him grabbing some chickens and talking to Sam and Dean about the case You where currently working on.

Gabriel barrely moved the entire time you all sat there talking, he sat there ever so slightly eating the food and glancing at you.

"So what's your deal?" you asked him after you finished, Dean had already set to work on opening the grocery bag full of deserts you picked up.

"What do you mean?" you shrugged.

"Well I don't know You very well....or at all for that matter but the boys here do so?...."

He looked at Sam and Dean across the table as if they where holding poster borards with what to say up. But they gave him the same look.

"Hello?" Sam cleared his throat and began talking. "Gabriel here is...An old hunting buddy of ours and....and came here for a place to stay for a while." You looked at the three men suspiciously.

"Ok well how long-"

"Years...years and years almost too long if you ask me." Dean chimmed in. You looked at Gabriel who flashed you an unconvincing smile.

Yet it was a smile and it sparked something in you causing you to return the guesture. "So tell me about you!" Gabriel said quickly catching both sam, Dean and you off gauird.

"Uh ok? What do you wanna know?" you shrugged crossing your arms and and leaning back in your chair to face him.

"Your hair is interesting." You laughed.

"Strange choice of topic but ok, yea I was feeling bold....thought it was time for a change. So I got up one night ran to the closest convinence store and picked the first color I saw, I stayed up till four in the morning doing it." You laughed.

He laughed lightly with you, he knew that's not really what happened but it was pretty close to something you would do no matter the state.

And then suddenly you where both talking like nothing had changed, you told him about things you liked and did as hobnies, you told him about music you had gotten into and movies you started watching.

You even told him stories of hunts, some scared him and made him worry for you, others impressed him and at somepoints made him laugh when you brought up a funny memory.

And to him it really felt like he hadn't lied to you for year, like he hadn't put you through pain and angony and it felt just almost like you where sitting on the front pouch of the house he stole you away to and talked as the Sun set behind the ocean.

And it felt the same to you, talking to him felt familiar and comfortable, it was like talking to Sam and Dean but times a thousand.

"You alright?" you swallowed thickly and furrowed your brows realising you had infact gone scilent and stared blankly at the table in front of you. "Yea...wow I just...just got lost in thought for a second there." you chuckled.

"Hey you should probably get some sleep." you hummed in response finally noticing Sam and Dean where obviously way ahead of you.

"Yea...uh did they show you where your room is?" you asked while standing up. "Yea I got it." You smiled and headed across the room to find your bedroom.

"Goodnight gabriel, it was nice meeting you." he frowned slightly. "Right...yea nice meeting you too!..."

He stayed there at the table for some time, he let his mind drift from one thing about you to the next, Sam and Dean hadn't told him what exactly happened to you, what you did when he left so he thought about that. When that got to painful he thought back to the house on the beach.

Years and years ago you ran away with him, he promised you a life hunting and being a winchester could have never promised.

He made sure your life took place some where that made you happy and worked hard to make it perfect and as far as he knew it was exactly that to you.

It was a small and quaint little cabin right on the edge of the beach, the beach because he remembered you telling him that never in your life have you been, he included a garden in the back, and your own personal art studio where he remembered watching you sing at along to bon jovie at the top of your lungs while you painted.

And then out in the front of the house there was a hammock tied to the post of the front pouch and a tree and you two would lie there rocking back and fourth lightly during the late afternoon talking and listening to the ocean.

"I thought you said Sam and Dean showed you your room?" Gabriel jumped awake upon hearing your voice. You laughed seeing him do so. "Easy sleeping beauty."

"What time is it?" he asked groggily sitting up. "Eight thirty, thing one and thing two went on a coffee run...what happened to you?"

"I don't know I guess I fell asleep before I could get up."

"Oh really? Is that what happened? You asked sarcastically. You pushed yourself off of the table and headed into the kitchen. "You like sweet things, right?"

He nodded while standing up to strech, but then paused. "How'd you know that?"

You turned slightly stopping yourself. "Uh...you told me didn't you? Last night." he narrowed his eyes trying to think. Maybe he did and he just couldn't remeber.

"Yea..." you smiled and continued into the kitchen. You appeared from the kitchen just in time to see Sam and Dean return with the coffee.

"Welcome home!" you said carrying a dish. "Wha y/n you never cook...what is this?"

You shrugged setting it down. "Cinnamon rolls." you said with a smirk. It didn't take long for Sam and Dean to notice you where acting diffrent now that Gabriel was around you would bring up weird thing, you kept spacing out at times and everything about you had shifted.

And that's exactly what got you hurt on your last hunt with the three of them. So you stayed in the bunker doing reasearch for them while Gabriel stayed and watched over you.

"Hey, I brought something for you to eat." He said pushing open the door. You smiled and sat yourself up slowly, still wincing at the slight movement. You held your side and mustered a smile.

"Hey take it easy, sugar." he set the plate down on the bed stand beside you and looked around the room eyes landing on the small desk and the art that hung on the wall above it.

"How are you holding up?" he asked looking the art closely.

"Uh as good as a person with a cracked rib could be." You responded. He chuckled lightly.

"These...are...amazing!" he said looking at them closely. He took note of the facless figure's with wings who's faces where scribbled out, then the house.

Your house, the one on the beach. "What...What is this?" he asked pointing to it.

"Oh the dream house." You grinned.

"The what?"

"Well being a Winchester and hunting things for a living isn't exactly a dream life...So I've always dreamt of living on this perfect little beach in this cute little house."

He watched as you smiled dreamily and continued explaining exactly what you had, like it was burried deep inside your mind, yet right at the surface of it all.

"And I'd live there with the person I love and we would just spend every day together going to the market near by or laying in the hammock..." you chuckled ever so slightly at the thought.

"But I'm here instead living my best life..." everything was scilent between you for a few moments. Then you shifted on the bed clutching your side. "Hey come here." You said patting the bed in front of you.

He did so and you held your hand out expectantly. "Gimme your hand." He did so a started wriggiling under your touch as you traced the lines on his hand.

"What are-"

"Reading your palm, a friend taught me a while back, Now Sit still dipshit." You giggled. He stopped when you said that breathing out lightly.

"Well lucky you." you stated excitedly. "It looks like..." you started laughing catching him off gauird. "What? What is it?"

"Nothing! Nothing! It's just...I have no idea what I'm doing! I've forgotten what she taught!" you laughed loudly still holding his hand. He grinned and started laughing along with you.

Once you died down you looked at each other quietly for a moment. And then suddenly you had his face in your hands and kissed him deeply, your kissy was needy and despreat, like you where missing it.

He didn't stop you either, he wrapped his arms around your back and deepend the kiss. You discarded your sweater which stopped Gabriel momentarily as he looked at the bandaging around your torso.

"Hey..." you kissed him between your words. "I'm fine."

He gingerly moved his hands down your torso. "I love you." he muttered out against your lips. You hummed kissing him deeply. And suddenly there was a sharp pain in your head and you free back grimcing.

"Y/n?" You scooted back holding your head. "I'm..." you let out a pain filled yelp screwing your eyes shut tightly.

"Y/n what's wrong!?" he moved to touch your arm and as soon as he did your ears where ringing and it felt like someone was pushing your head into a wall slowly, you let out one more scream before Your vision went black.

"Gabe!" Dean grabbed you and pulled you back from the scene in front of you. Gabriel really did his hardest to take down Lucifer but it didn't look so good. Because he had an angel blade deep in the gut of the person you loved.

"Oh no...gabe look." he turned Gabriel around to face you as your brother held you from attacking Lucifer. Tears rimmed your eyes as you struggled to run over to him.

He swallowed thickly as he looked at you. "I'm...I'm...so sorry..." Lucifer pulled the blade from him and let him drop. "Oops."

You let out an angry scream at him before he vanished. You kicked Deans leg hard causing him to loosen his grip.

You ran over to him stopping when you saw the black scorch marks of wings sit on the floor around him. "Fuck, Gabriel!?" you fell to your knees slowly touching him lightly. "Gabe?...Angel?...Angel cakes!? Please!" you shook him slightly hoping that would do it.

"Gabriel you ass! Don't you dare!" when he didn't move you sobbed into his chest. "Y/n...come on...we need to go.." you shook sam away from you. "NO! I should have fucking listened to him! And stayed at home! He gave me a home sam! And now...now he's dead and I...I can't...can't go back home!" they where scilent. "And he didn't say good bye He said I'm sorry....it wasn't his fault..."

Suddenly your eyes snapped open and it felt like the wind was knocked from you, tears slid down your face, and You breathed heavily looking up at the consirened Angel in front of you. "Y/n?" he asked carefully.

"What the hell..." You breathed finally. He furrowed his brows. "YOUR DEAD! YOUR FUCKING DEAD!" you yelled getting up quickly.

"Wait, y/n-"

"I...I went through hell and now your...your back!?" you grabbed your sweater pulling it on. You stumbled, your head was still burning and your side ached.

"Y/n stop let me explain-"

"Fuck you gabriel! I trusted you! I loved you and and you faked your death I assume...and What where you doing? Huh? Off with some slutty pornstars!?"

The angrier you got the more your head started reeling digging up memories you'd lost after that, putting the pieces together. "Get out."

"What?"

"GET OUT I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU!" you yelled pinching the bridge of your noise holding back tears. "No we should talk-"

"Gabriel." you said flatly, glaring up at him. He looked down and quickly left the room. You followed slamming the door shut. He stood there for a little bit and soon enough heard you sobbing. "I'm sorry..." you heard him mumble. Outside the door. You stopped and just burried your head in your arms chocking on sobs trying to ignore the memories that where lost that started flooding your head.

When he got no response he sighed and took a seat outside your door hoping you would open it and let him explain or help.

[migleefulmoments]

Oh my God. So now people in Hollywood are threatening Darren and Chris's families if they don't comply? Tinhats are saying they wouldn't be surprised if someone died in a freak accident to put Darren and Chris in line. How long before they bring up Chris's mom and start getting suspicious?

Anonymous said: Damn it’s real dramatic over in CCLand today. Abby’s “anons” are talking about how someone must have threatened to kill Darren or Chris’s family if Darren didn’t get married. And then we have Abby saying that no matter what happens she won’t abandon them. Yeah, she is definitely setting the stage for claiming someone threatened to kill Chris if Darren didn’t have a baby with Mia. She knows a baby is coming eventually and she can’t let go of her CCThrone.

It’s da Mafia, my friends! 

They are so full of themselves-and so dramatic- it’s terrifying. 

I keep saying that Abby is writing a Telenovela and damn does she love the drama. She’s also desperate to keep her storyline going and there just isn’t a logical reason WHY Darren would be in the closet and married to Mia at this point unless you go for “big threats”. Abby has suggested this vague“threat” theory before but nobody else picked it up so we never had such scary-hilarious promises of allegiance to Criss and Colfer. This is exactly the kind of pithy, over-the-top emotional digging into a cause that social media was made for- the kind in which you have no actual impact but you blog the hell out it like you matter.  

One of the biggest issues with the CrissColfer storyline is why should we be sympathetic to ccDarren and/or ccChris? They are both successful, famous, wealthy, powerful men. Abby’s never-ending criticisms of ccDarren are becoming a problem. While she always blames it on “his team”, most people don’t find it so obviously his team’s fault as evidenced by her Nonnies who then get a lecture on HOW it IS his team’s fault. Of course, nobody is controlled by their employees and ccDarren and ccChris aren’t victims or children. 

Abby delights when she can claim that ccDarren is treating Mia abhorrently because it fulfills her hatred of Mia but nobody else feels so delighted. For instance, she claimed he was trying to pull her in the water during a New Year’s Eve embrace. 

I’m guessing, and we are missing the moment inbetween d goes to dip her so she things she’s getting her kiss but in fact tries to throw her in the water.(X)

The sane among us are disgusted by a claim that he would try to drown his wife. The same goes for ccChris when he publically bullies and shames Mia on social media and his books. Abby’s love of hating Mia often overshadows her need to keep ccChris and ccDarren as victims. 

The basis of CrissColfer is that both men want to be famous and work in Hollywood for the big money and they can’t tell their truth without fear of losing everything. After ten years, both men are no longer the “inexperienced, naive, innocent young men who made bad choices when fame was flashed in their faces” and Abby needs a new spin in order to keep her followers emotionally invested. Throw in a storyline where both men are just trying to stay afloat after their families were threatened and WHOA man, you have two very compelling characters with sympathy through the roof.

Anonymous asked: Let's not forget that with the wedding being the lesser of two evils, one of the threats could have gone far beyond you or C would never be working in this industry again, like you said, the people in power will do anything to hide their sins and there really is no limit, who knows a threat on his (or C's or other family) live could have been made. It sure as hell wouldn't be the first time someone dies in a freak accident because they have dirt on someone (Chris already lost his mom in a freak accident. I can’t imagine he would ruin his entire life over the fear of losing someone else when he understands that life is precious and you can’t control what happens to family members. Or the other argument is why would he allow someone to control his life when the easy solution is to go off to NYC and become an author.  Leave Hollywood behind for the man he loves and living an authentic life. It doesn’t seem like that hard of a tradeoff to me)

ajw720 answered: Nonnie. I’m really starting to question. And m has her family and SS on her side. That’s a lot of power and ruthlessness. (I'm always fascinated by the power that Abby imagines Mia’s family has. If Chris and Darren are powerless then why is the head of Vera Wang’s company so powerful? Mia’s dad owned a small chain of small music venues. He’s likely loaded but not in the BIG powerful world of movers and shakers. As for Sunshine Sachs- they are very powerful and healthy but there is little incentive for them to risk it all by getting involved in little unknown Darren’s love life by closeting him).    

I’ve decided. No matter what they throw at us, while i may not be able to watch as closely, I’m not abandoning them unless there comes a point I think it’s willing. I don’t see that happening. What is happening is not about straight. (What “they throw at us”? This isn’t about you, Abby. Nothing about CC is about you. You’re just a lonely, unstable fan sitting in her living room all alone obsessing about Mia and fabricating outrageous stories about a family you don’t know and a man who doesn’t care about you. I’m curious, what would convince you that he’s willing? You already said you wouldn’t believe him if he told you he loved Mia.  You’re destinated to come out the loser because you refuse to see or accept reality.)    

It’s about hiding sins. If it were just straight as I have repeatedly said it would be done better and with someone that actually makes d look good. (So she’s twisting the story to be about hiding sins.  I’m not sure how forcing the farce to continue is a good strategy to ensure you don’ get caught. It seems like a cut and run strategy is better- preferably with big payoffs. Lots of us DO think Darren does look good. It’s only the people obsessed that he’s gay who don’t like him).

I just hope they have finally aligned with the right people to help them (How would this work? Either Ryan and Sunshine are terrified of their role coming out, all-powerful and threatening his family to keep it quiet OR there are people to align with who can help but not both because people who threaten others' lives for their own interests aren’t going to show up at the negotiation table willing to work out and deal).

flowersintheattic254. @ajw720 I’ll state publicly that I’m with you on that. I’m not going away unless I see it’s willing. Right now it doesn’t seem to be and frankly the more I learn about Holly/wood and how people are manipulated and abused the more I think it isn’t a choice or a very unwilling one. (Why would Darren and Chris stay there if it is that bad?  If Hollywood is one big cesspool then reasonable people would get the hell out of dodge, do something because living in that environment will turn you into that kind of person.  Also, I just have to add that the Catholic Church has an abysmal record on sex abuse of women and children so if anyplace is manipulative and abusive, it’s Abby’s church)

leka-1998 Totally agreed.

I feel like every day I get more repulsed by what the people in that awful industry are capable of.

notes-from-nowhere If it is possible, the more I know, the more I feel compelled to stand up against this habits and fight back. (How exactly will you do that? I’m fascinated and can’t wait to hear)

Nothing will change overnight. Not D’s life, not the ones of the others in his same situation but we can do something. And as much as we could, I’m sure, we will. (No shit sherlock, you’re 10 years  inand no end in sight)

I will accept defeat the day D will show me, without a doubt, that this is what he wants for his life and not matter if right or wrong, I will respect his choice. To date, I don’t think we are even close to that. Time will tell. (Again, what can Darren do to prove to you? He married the woman he’s dated for 8 years, he opened a business with her, he gushed about the wedding, and he travels with her everywhere. When he tells you how he feels about her you all instantly dismiss his words as being contracted or “Mia wrote them”.  You refuse to SEE what is so plain in front of you. I cannot imagine what he could do that would convince you.)  

In the meantime I will keep doing what I do now. (which is lie, twist facts, post Glee photos as CrissColfer, make stupid comparisons, and blow some up Abby’s ass).   

Anonymous asked: I agree about HW and who knows what kind of nefarious shit goes on. The problem I have is his parents not intervening in this . I get there is probably blackmail at this point but surely his parents can see this can’t go on. I’m afraid it’s affecting his family at this point and I would think his dad would take the reigns at some point and say enough. This is the only thing that tells me it’s short term and there is an escape date. I don’t see his parents accepting something permanent.

Do they have a choice though nonnie? That’s the question. How are they more powerful then the heavy weights he’s up against? What has been threatened? I have an idea of where I think this is going but I don’t know and I’m firm there’s 2 distinct paths, one is freedom. The other is too horrifying for words. And I think by the end of the year we will know. (She is sure they will be divorcing after the anniversary and Hollywood airs.) 

Because no doubt this has gravely hurt d and his spirit. And between c and his parents, i’d think they are doing everything to help him win. All parties on his side have to be petrified. Because even if there’s a positive plan in place, what’s to stop it from changing? Because I reiterate. D was going to come out tied to ACS and it went nightmarishly wrong. And he’s well being and safety are at stake for as long as she is tied to him. (She reiterates God Damnit! She KNOWS she was right!!!!!!! WTAF? No, he wasn’t going to come out. He’s told you he’s straight and there is no reason to suspect he’s lying. I love the comments about his safety as long as Mia is around or his image as long as his team is around-He’s fucking thriving. When is the shit going to hit the fan? He won the top four awards, has his own show on a new platform, has a big Broadway show coming, has a Ryan Murphy Netflix show that he helped co-create, Elsie is amazing, StarKid had a very successful year, his wedding is all over the “top celeb weddings” lists, he was busy AF this year and he just bought a $3 million house. It’s been a decade-when will this bad stuff start? ). 

Anonymous asked: I do fear D is in this for the long haul unfortunately. It has slowed down for her a bit post-nuptials but unless this show with RM is serving as an out, I don’t see how D will ever get out of this. We also need to remember she knows too much too at this point. It’s not that easy to get someone with the amount of info she has to just go away. If she’s intent on riding coattails, there may be little D can do to get rid of her. I hope I’m wrong. I want to see him win. But it doesn’t look good. (What does ccMia know that she can use against him? That would mean he’s done something wrong but according to cc lexicon, it’s all done against him, he’s the victim. If anything he would have dirt on her to use) 

I can’t believe how naive I was to think it was as simple as d&c saying no. I doubt that was ever an option and they learned that, after months of fighting post encagement, in the cruelest manner. Honestly I’m feeling almost more heartbroken today then on feb 16 because I’m finally seeing the horrifying reality of HW.Nonnie. Despite the fact that I don’t trust him, I’m praying that RM saw that it serves his agenda and reputation to help d as it would rehabilitate his character much more than to continue to hurt him, because at this point I think he’s the only person that has the power to get him out. Now we wait and see. (I don’t see how Ryan Murphy can serve as both Mafia boss and his savior but I understand that he’s the only one that could possibly play that role right now. There are no other gay Yoda’s in Darren’s life with enough cloud to be the “savior” so by process of elimination, Ryan is the one). .   ’t see how Ryan Murphy can serve as both Mafia boss and his savior but I understand that he’s the only one that could possibly play that role right now. There are no other gay Yoda’s in Darren’s life with enough cloud to be the “savior” so by process of elimination, Ryan is the one).    

I can’t believe how naive I was to think it was as simple as d&c saying no. I doubt that was ever an option and they learned that, after months of fighting post encagement, in the cruelest manner. Honestly I’m feeling almost more heartbroken today then on feb 16 because I’m finally seeing the horrifying reality of HW. (So basically, the original cc storyline isn’t holding up anymore after the end dates passed for coming out- Glee ended, the 8-year contract expired, Hedwig ended, ACS started, filmed and ended, Awards season came to a finish and now you’re hoping the anniversary is the lucky date.  But you need to explain why Darren and Chris have so much power and still are not together so you’re going for something bigger and more sinister.  The problem is that while Hollywood has a seedy underbelly, you can’t take one person’s story and extrapolates it to everyone. Judy Garland may have been drugged but they didn’t know the effect of drugs back then like we do know and the military gives the pilots “go” and “no go” pills to help them perform to this day under close medical supervision)