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bluescluesnerd · 4 months ago

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Blue's Clues AU S1E1: Snack Time

[Opening sequence; fade in to a long shot at a pile of different types of children's books where the camera rotates -45 degrees clockwise on a book that says "Blue's Clues" sits on top of the pile. The camera turns up slightly until it stops in front of the book where it slowly opens up to reveal a yellow house with a red roof and purple door sitting on top of a grassy hill surrounded by various things all over said hill: A bunch of flowers where a blue puppy is secretly hiding behind them with a ball on the left side, and an apple tree with a tire swing tied to its branch with a purple mailbox with a face, on the right side; a man wearing a green-striped shirt pops out from the right window, two smaller puppies, one of which looks like a smaller lookalike of the blue puppy while the other puppy has the same pattern of spots but has bluish-white fur with periwinkle-colored spots, pop out from the doggy door, and a six-year-old girl wearing a green-striped shirt similar to the man pops out from the left window as the camera stops at a full-view of the scene.]

Man: [waving to the camera] Hi, out there! [pointing to himself] It's me, Steve!

Small blue puppy: With Bill!

Bluish-white puppy: And Parky!

Girl: [also waving to the camera] And me, Sally! Have you seen Blue?

Viewers: There she is!

[The puppy (Blue) pops right out of the bunches of flowers and hops on over to the ball]

Blue: Ta-da!

Man (Steve): Ooh!

Girl (Sally): Great!

Both small puppies (Bill and Parky): Woah!

All: Come on in! [duck inside the house]

[The camera zooms in slowly as Blue bounces the ball towards the mailbox, who bounces back with its flag. A salt shaker and pepper shaker appear on the left window. A bar of soap and a clock appear on the left window. On the right side of the house, a shovel and pail appear; on each couple of steps, Blue stops to scat at the camera. After stopping three times, Blue goes into the light purple doggy door as the camera stops in front of the purple front door. The door opens to reveal Steve and Sally in a living room; the living room features a big red chair in the middle, a picture frame that has a picture of a barn and silo in it, and a side table with a phone on the top]

Steve: Hi!

Sally: Come on in!

Both: We’re so glad you’re here! [Steve and Sally walk over to a small table]

Sally: Bill! Parky! [Bill and Parky both rush up to Steve and Sally]

Steve: [Steve and Sally turn to the camera] It’s almost snack time. [Steve, Sally Bill, and Parky stop near the snack table where Blue is seen hiding underneath it. On the wall is a reddish ovular felt frame with a felt person holding an ice cream cone; everyone is oblivious to Blue’s presence as they look around and call her] Blue?

Sally: Blue?

Bill: Mom?

Parky: Mom, where are you?

[Blue winks to the camera as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the camera]

Steve: Uh, did you see Blue?

Viewers: Right there! Under the table!

Sally: Oh. [the four of them mouth “Under the table”; they give the signal and turn around]

Steve & Sally: A-ha!

Bill & Parky: Gotcha!

Blue: [pops out from under the table] You found me!

Steve: [chuckles] Blue! What are you up to? [Blue rushes to her seat]

Bill: Come on!

Parky: It’s just about snack time!

Sally: And we’re having graham crackers! [turns to Steve] Is everything ready, Dad?

Bill and Parky: Yeah, Uncle Steve. Are we ready?

Steve: Yep. I have everything ready for snack. [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky all walk over to the table] We have graham crackers…

Sally: Check.

Steve: …we have plates…

Bill: Check.

Steve: … we have napkins…

Parky: Check.

Steve: Looks like we’re all ready for snack!

Blue: [shaking her head] We’re not ready right now, guys.

Everyone but Blue: Huh?

Steve: We don’t everything ready for snack?

Blue: [shaking her head again] No, we don’t.

Steve: [scratches his head] Well, what else do you want with your snack, Blue?

Sally: Yeah, Aunt Blue. What else do we need?

[Blue then leaps towards the camera, and places a blue pawprint on the left side of the screen; a cymbal roll sound is heard]

Steve: Ooh! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky rush over to the pawprint] Okay! We’ll play [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky open and close their hands or paws] Blue’s Clues!

Sally: That’s a great idea! I love Blue’s Clues!

Steve: Me too!

Bill and Parky: Same here!

[Music starts playing as the four of them swing their arms]

All four: [singing] ♫We are gonna play Blue's Clues 'cause that’s a really great game!♫ Yeah!

[all four give thumbs up]

Steve: You ready? Let’s go!

[Steve starts to walk off, but Sally, Bill, and Parky stay behind]

Sally: Um, Dad?

Steve: Hm? [looks up and realizes the pawprint is still on the screen] Whoops! Heh, I forgot. We should probably clean this up first. [Steve pulls out a kitchen towel to wipe the pawprint off] There. [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the camera]

Sally: Now remember, Blue’s pawprints will be on the clues.

All four: [the four of them open and close their hands and paws again] Blue’s Clues!

Steve: Hey, you know what we need for Blue’s Clues? Our Handy Dandy…

Viewers: Notebooks!

Sally: Notebooks! Right! Come on! [all four head off-camera right]

[Cut to a medium shot of the sidetable, which now has two eyes and a mouth on its drawer, as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky come into view; Steve kneels]

Sidetable: Blue’s Clues, I’m so excited! [the sidetable opens her drawer]

Steve: Ooh! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky reach inside and take out their notebooks; Steve and Sally’s notebooks both have a green cover with the big red chair on the front and a red spiral with a crayon with a green-striped wrap, while Bill and Parky’s notebooks look similar to Steve and Sally’s, but Bill’s notebook has blue instead of green on the cover, and with a crayon with a light-blue-striped wrap, and Parky’s notebook cover has periwinkle instead of green, and a crayon with a white-and-blue wrap] Here it is! [cut to a close up of the four as they pop into view and put down their notebooks] You know, I can tell we’re really gonna need your help today figuring out what Blue wants with her snack. Will you help us?

Sally: [the viewers respond] You will? Great!

[music starts playing as the four rush off-screen to the front of the living room as they begin to sing with Blue; during the song, Blue does something whenever someone sings the following words: she raises her ears up and sings along when the others sing "Blue's Clues", shows her pawprint when someone sings "Pawprint", pulls out Steve's notebook with her mouth when someone sings "Notebook" while the others pull out their notebooks, and copies Steve's movements when everyone sings "Think."]

Steve: ♫We gotta find a pawprint♫

Sally: ♫That’s the first clue. ♫

Bill and Parky: ♫We put it in our notebooks♫

Steve: ♫And now what do we do? ♫

Blue: (scatting)

Steve: ♫Blue’s Clues, ♫

All five: ♫Blue’s Clues!♫

Viewers: Blue’s Clues!

Sally: ♫We gotta find another pawprint♫

Steve: ♫That’s the second clue. ♫

Bill and Parky: ♫We put it in our notebooks♫

Steve: Now what do we do?

Blue: (scatting)

Steve: ♫Blue’s Clues, ♫

All five: ♫Blue’s Clues!♫

Viewers: Blue’s Clues!

Steve & Sally: ♫We gotta find another pawprint♫

Bill: ♫That’s the third clue. ♫

Parky: ♫We put it in our notebooks♫

Steve: And, well…

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: You know what to do!

All five: ♫Blue’s Clues, Blue’s Clues! ♫

Viewers: Blue’s Clues!

Steve: ♫Well, we sit down in our Thinking Chair♫

[Cut to a medium long shot of Steve and Sally sitting in the Thinking Chair with Bill and Parky sitting on the left arm and Blue sitting by the right arm]

Steve and Sally: ♫ And think…♫

Bill and Parky: ♫Think…♫

All five: ♫Think♫

[Pull back where everyone but Blue get up from the Thinking Chair]

Steve and Sally: ♫’Cause when we use our minds♫

Bill and Parky: ♫And take a step at a time, ♫

Everyone but Blue: ♫We can do…♫

Blue: Uh-huh!

Everyone but Blue: ♫Anything…♫

[Everyone ducks down as Blue leaps toward the camera]

Blue: Yeah!

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [pop up] That we wanna do! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky give the viewers jazz hands as the song ends]

Steve: [motions the viewers to follow them] Come on! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky walk to the right while another song with the same melody from “We are Gonna Play Blue’s Clues” starts playing; they pass a window and enter a room with a purplish wall with small white circles] ♫We are looking for Blue’s Clues♫

Sally: ♫We are looking for Blue’s Clues.♫

Bill and Parky: ♫We are looking for Blue’s Clues♫

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: ♫We wonder where they are.♫ [they pass a table with a lamp (with a snail on top of it!), a drawing with some crayons, and a yellow cup on its side with a pawprint on it, and on the wall is a drawing of Blue, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky and a bunch of grapes in a purple frame similar to the one in the living room; the four are oblivious as they start to walk off camera]

Kid: A clue, a clue!

Steve: [the four of them move back and turn to the camera] Oh! Oh, did you see a clue?!

Sally: Where? [the four of them look around for the clue]

Bill: Where’s the clue? [they continue to look around]

Parky: We can’t find the clue!

Kid: Right there! [giggles]

Steve: Oh. [the four look down , or up, and see the cup with a pawprint as the cymbal roll from earlier is heard again] Oh!

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [pointing towards the cup] The clue! [cut to a close-up of the cup as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky look at the pawprint]

Steve: Aha! [points to the cup again]

Sally: You know how you can tell it’s a clue?

Bill: It’s got Mom’s pawprints on it!

Parky: It’s our first…

Viewers, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: Blue’s Clue! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky do the signature move again]

Steve: …Now what do we do?

Viewers: Notebooks!

Sally: Yeah! We need our Handy Dandy… [cut to a close-up of Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky as they stand up]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [bass chords are heard calmly strumming as the four of them pull out their notebooks as the ding of a triangle plays]…Notebooks! [they begin to scat as they look at their notebooks; cut to a close-up of the first blank notebook pages as they begin to draw the first clue]

Steve: [from o.c.] Okay, a big circle… [all four draw a circle for the opening of the cup]

Sally: [from o.c] …lines for the sides… [the four of them draw two lines on either side of the circle for the sides of the cup]

Bill: [from o.c.] …a line for the bottom… [all four draw a line at the bottom connecting to the two lines]

Parky: [from o.c.] …add two lines… [all four draw two lines in the cup for a stripe]

All: …and we have a cup! [cut to a close-up of the group of four as the camera turns up slightly while Steve’s drawing of the cup rises to the upper-left of the screen while they glance at it; xylophone notes can be heard playing rhythmically]

Steve: Well, you can’t eat a cup for a snack. [chuckles]

Sally: [giggles] No, you can’t. [realizes something] Hey, do you think Blue wants to put something in the cup? [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers, who respond to the question]

Bill and Parky: Yeah!

Steve: So I think we have to look for more Blue’s Clues to figure out what else she wants with her snack! [the camera pans back down slightly as the drawing descends back into the notebooks as the group closes their notebooks] Come on! [Steve motions the viewers to follow them again as they walk o.c. right; cut to the area right next to it with a purple end table with the clock from the opening on top of it, next to a bed that Blue is hiding under]

Steve and Sally: [calling] Blue!

Bill and Parky: [calling] Mom?

[The four of them walk past the bed (and Blue) until they come back and walk over to the viewers]

Steve: You see Blue?

Sally, Bill, and Parky: Where?

Viewers: Under the bed!

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [softly] Oh, under the bed. [they shush the viewers and start walking over to the side of the bed]

Steve: [singsong] I don’t see Blue!

[Cut to a close-up of Blue under the bed]

Sally, Bill, and Parky: [from o.c.] Neither do we!

[Blue winks at the viewers; cut to a full shot as the group of four shushes the viewers again. They begin to look under the bed, but when they get a good look…]

Blue: Yoink! […Blue zooms to the top of the bed! Then, just before they stop looking under the bed, she zooms back to her spot. Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky glance at the camera. They look under the bed to try and catch Blue in the act, but…]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: A-ha! […when they look at the top of the bed, she’s not there. They glance at the fourth wall again]

[This happens several times, until they realize what’s going on, so they decide to look under and over the bed faster than before, with Blue going along with it, until the four stop and look at the top of the bed; Blue does not realize this until she stops.]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: A-ha! [the five of them laugh until they hear an elephant trumpet o.c.]

Steve: Hey, what was that?

Sally: Sounded like an elephant to me.

[Blue hops to a painting of elephants, with one orange elephant wearing a green cap and three other elephants without colors; the orange elephant trumpets at Blue]

Orange Elephant: Hey, hey, Blue, there you are! I’ve been waiting for you! You didn’t finish painting my family.

Blue: Oh my gosh, I forgot all about that! Don’t worry, I’ll help finish it!

[Blue runs around in place before jumping into the painting as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky rush over]

Steve: Woah! [the group looks at the painting, and then to the viewers] Can you help Blue finish painting the picture? [they wait for the viewers to respond]

Sally: Great! Then we can look for more…

All four: [the group does the signature move again] Blue’s Clues.

Orange Elephant: Okay, let’s paint the biggest elephant yellow.

Bill: Hmm. [to the viewers] Can you show Mom the color yellow?

[The camera cuts to a close up Blue, the painting, and the paint colors; the colors, from left to right, are yellow, green, pink, purple, and red]

Blue: [Blue hops over to the red paint] Is this yellow?

Kid: Uh-uh!

Blue: [Blue hops over to the purple paint] Is this yellow?

Viewers: Nope!

Blue: [Blue hops over to the yellow paint] Is this yellow?

Kid: Yeah, there it is! Yellow!

Blue: Thanks! [dunks herself into the yellow paint and comes out all yellow. Blue shakes the yellow paint off of her, thus painting the biggest elephant yellow. The now-yellow elephant takes a peanut from the bowl in the middle of the painting]

Yellow Elephant: Why, thank you!

[The camera goes back to the group]

Steve: [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky give the viewers a thumbs up] Good work! [The camera cuts back to Blue and the painting]

Orange Elephant: [to the yellow elephant] Hi, Mom! [to Blue] That was awesome! Blue, can we paint the elephant with the longest trunk pink now?

[cut back to the others]

Steve: Can you show Blue the color pink?

[cut back to Blue, the painting, and the paints]

Blue: [Blue hops over to the red paint again] Is this pink?

Kid: Nope!

Blue: [Blue hops over to the purple paint again] Is this pink?

Viewers: Nope!

Blue: [Blue hops over to the green paint] Is this pink?

Kid: Nope!

Blue: [Blue hops over to the pink paint] Is THIS pink?

Kid: That’s the pink!

Blue: Thanks again! [Blue dunks herself into the pink paint and comes out all pink. Blue shakes the pink paint off her, thus painting the elephant with the longest trunk pink. The now-pink elephant takes a peanut from the bowl]

Pink Elephant: Why, thank you!

Orange Elephant: [to the pink elephant] How you doing, bro? [to Blue] That was great! Okay, can you paint the baby elephant purple?

[The camera goes back to the group]

Sally: Can you show Blue the color purple?

[cut back to Blue, the painting, and the paints]

Blue: [in front of the red paint yet again] Is this purple?

Viewers: Nope!

Blue: [Blue hops over to the purple paint yet again] How about this one? Is this purple?

Viewers: Purple, right there!

Blue: Thank you! [Blue dunks herself into the purple paint and comes out all purple. Blue shakes the purple paint off her, thus painting the baby elephant purple. Blue hops to the left side of the painting while the baby elephant takes a peanut from the bowl]

Baby Elephant: Thank you!

[The camera goes back to the group]

Steve: [in a French accent] What a painter, zat Blue! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky clap; normal voice] And all of you, too!

[Blue jumps out of the painting, going left o.c. as the elephants trumpet together; Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky watch Blue]

Parky: Mom? [to viewers] Come on!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky run into the living room]

Steve: [calling] Blue, where are-?

[Suddenly, the phone rings, making Steve fall down and Sally, Bill, and Parky trip over him; they then get back up]

Sally: It’s the phone. [The group walks over to the phone as Steve picks up the receiver; the kids gather around to hear the phone call]

Steve: Hello?

Male French Voice and Female French Voice: [on the phone in unison] Allô, allô!

Male French Voice: Zis is Mr. Salt!

Female French Voice: And Mrs. Pepper!

Steve: [The group of four turns to the viewers] It’s our good friends, Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper. [They turn back to the phone as Steve talks into the receiver again] Hello, Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper! How are you?

Male French Voice and Female French Voice (Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper): [in unison] Fine.

Mrs. Pepper: But Blue is in ze kitchen!

Mr. Salt: And she’s making a mess!

Steve: Uh-oh. Alright, stay put, we’ll be right there. [Steve hangs up the phone as the group turns back to the viewers]

Sally: You will come and help us with this, won’t you? [Pause as the group hears the viewers’ response] You will?

Bill: Cool!

Parky: Alright, we better get to the kitchen.

Bill and Parky: And fast!

[The group walks to the left as they pass the snack table and felt frame while another song with the same melody from “We are Gonna Play Blue’s Clues” starts playing]

Steve: Wait ‘til you meet our friends Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper!

Sally: You’re gonna love them!

[They enter the kitchen, which has yellow wallpaper with darker yellow spirals and a yellow and white checkerboard-patterned floor. There is also a window with yellow curtains, where the snail from earlier is hiding behind]

Steve and Sally: ♫We are going to the kitchen♫

Bill and Parky: ♫To meet our kitchen friends♫

All four: Yeah!

[The group starts scatting until they see Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper- the salt shaker and pepper shaker from the opening- on the counter, along with two grocery bags- one full, and the other on its side empty, along with four foods: going clockwise, a bunch of grapes, cheese, a graham cracker, and an orange]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: Hi, Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper!

[Blue enters the scene; Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper wave to the group]

Mr. Salt: Hello, Steve and Sally!

Mrs. Pepper: Hello, Bill and Parky!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky notice the food on the counter and start to mutter “Oh", “Ooh”, and “Yeesh”; Blue tries to whistle innocently, but the others are not convinced]

Sally: [flatly] Aunt Blue, what did you do?

[Cut to a close-up of Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper]

Mr. Salt: Well, Blue knocked over ze grocery bag.

Mrs. Pepper: Zat’s what she did.

[The camera cuts to a medium shot of the counter, the foods, Steve, Sally, Bill, Parky, Blue, Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper; Steve, Blue, Sally, Bill, and Parky huddle together as they whisper unintelligibly, then exit the huddle]

Steve: Yeah, that’s a good idea, Blue.

Bill: Let’s clean this up first.

Sally: [Everyone turns to face the viewers] And then we can look for more…

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [The four of them do the signature move again] Blue’s Clues.

Parky: I think we’re gonna need your help putting all of this food away. [Blue nods her head]

[Cut back to the close-up of Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper]

Mr. Salt: Okay.

Mrs. Pepper: Okay. Let’s start with ze great big circle…

Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper: [in unison] Like zis! [they form their mouths into circles]

[Cut back to the medium shot of the group and the foods; The others shape their mouths into circles and give the “OK” signal]

Steve: Okay, circle. [Blue, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky look at the foods]

Sally: Well, all of the foods do have circles…

[Cut to a close up of the foods]

Bill: [from o.c.] But which one is the BIG circle?

[Beat, as an outline appears around the orange]

Viewers: It’s the orange!

[Blue’s paw enters into view as she grabs the orange and takes it off-screen; Cut to the refrigerator as Blue bounces the orange onto the right of the top shelf]

[Cut back to Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper]

Mr. Salt: Great!

Mrs. Pepper: Great! Now let’s put away ze square…

Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper: [in unison] Like zis! [they form their mouths into squares]

[Cut back to the medium shot of the group and the foods; The others trace outlines of squares around their mouths and give the “OK” signal]

Parky: Okay, square. [Blue, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky look at the foods again]

Bill: I think I see three squares…

[Cut back to the close up of the foods]

Sally: [from o.c.] But which one is just ONE square?

[Beat, as an outline appears around the cheese]

Viewers: It’s right there! It’s the cheese!

[Blue’s paw enters into view again as she grabs the cheese and takes it off-screen; Cut back to the refrigerator as Blue bounces the cheese onto the top shelf next to the orange]

[Cut back to Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper]

Mr. Salt: Wonderful!

Mrs. Pepper: Wonderful!

Mr. Salt: Now let’s put away ze rectangle!

Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper: [in unison] Like zis! [they form their mouths into rectangles]

[Cut back to the medium shot of the group and the foods; The others trace outlines of rectangles around their mouths and give the “OK” signal]

Sally: ‘Kay, rectangle. [Blue, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky look at the foods yet again, then turn to the viewers]

Steve: I’m not sure if I can see the rectangle.

[Cut back to the close up of the foods]

Parky: [from o.c.] Could you show us which one is the rectangle too?

[Beat, as an outline appears around the graham cracker]

Kid: There it is! That’s the graham cracker! [giggles]

[Blue’s paw enters into view yet again as she grabs the graham cracker and takes it off-screen; Cut back to the refrigerator as Blue somehow bounces the graham cracker without breaking onto the right of the bottom shelf]

[Cut back to Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper]

Mr. Salt: Great!

Mrs. Pepper: Great!

Mr. Salt: Now let’s put away ze triangle!

Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper: [in unison] Like zis! [they form their mouths into upside-down triangles]

[Cut back to the medium shot of the group and the foods- er, food; The others try to stretch their mouths to look like upside-down triangles while Blue rolls her eyes towards the camera]

Bill: Uh, triangle. [Blue, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky look at the food, singular, once more, then turn to the viewers]

Parky: I don’t think we can see a triangle.

[Cut back to the close up of the food]

Steve: [from o.c] Could you show us the triangle?

[Beat, as an outline appears around the grapes]

Kid: See? The bunch of grapes! Right there!

Steve: [from o.c. as the outline around the grapes disappears] The grapes? [in realization] Oh, yeah! [The outline reappears] The grapes do kinda make the shape of a triangle!

[Blue’s paw enters into view once more as she grabs the grape bunch and takes it off-screen; Cut back to the refrigerator as Blue bounces the grapes onto the bottom shelf next to the graham cracker]

[Cut back to the medium shot of Steve, Sally, Bill, Parky, Mr. Salt, and Mrs. Pepper; Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky face the viewers]

Sally: Hey, thanks for helping! [Blue enters from o.c right]

Bill and Parky: [to Blue] And thank you, too, Mom!

Blue: Anytime, guys! [Blue leaves o.c right]

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky glance at the fridge, then look away, then double take as they are amazed by something happening off-screen]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: WOAH! [they turn to the viewers]

Steve: [points his thumb to the fridge] Look at the fridge! [The group turns back to the fridge]

[Cut to the fridge where the foods are bouncing around, until the cheese and grapes form a house, with the graham cracker as the door and the orange as the sun. Blue appears from the house and jumps out past the others as she crashes into something off-screen. Steve motions the viewers to follow them]

[Cut to a cup knocked down with straws spilled around as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky enter the scene]

Bill and Parky: Oh no.

Steve: Now Blue knocked over these straws!

Sally: Maybe we should put them away.

[Steve picks up the cup and places it back in the upright position as he hums, while Sally, Bill, and Parky gather the straws and hand them to Steve as he fixes the straws and puts them back in the cup; they are all humming while this happens]

Steve: There! Now all the straws are put away.

[While Steve says this, another straw appears with three pawprints on it and moves around; The four of them are oblivious as the viewers notice the clue]

Sally: Huh? You see another straw?

Kid: A clue, a clue!

Bill and Parky: Where?

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky look over to the left side as the straw moves to the right side, then they try looking on the right side but the straw moves to the left side]

Sally: We don’t see it!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky keep looking for the straw, until they sneak up behind the straws in the cup. Steve gently pushes the straws in the cup aside as the group sees the single straw]

Bill and Parky: A-HA!

[Steve lifts up the cup as the group chuckles]

Steve: Well, now, that’s about the silliest straw we ever saw.

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky notice the pawprints on the straw as the cymbal roll sound is heard again]

Sally: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! That straw has Blue's pawprints on it!

Steve: It must be one of…

Viewers, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] Blue’s Clues! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky do the signature move again]

Bill: You know what to do!

Parky: We need our Handy Dandy…

[cut to a close-up of Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky as they stand up as the bass chords are heard calmly strumming again]

Kid, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: Notebooks! [the group pulls out their notebooks as the triangle ding is heard again; they flip to the next blank pages of their notebooks]

[Cut to a close-up of the second blank notebook pages as they begin to write the second clue]

Steve: [from o.c.] Let’s see… there’s the top… [all four draw a small oval in the upper left]

Sally: [from o.c.] …couple of lines… [all four draw two lines on the sides of the oval]

Bill: [from o.c.] …and a little bendy part… [all four draw small zigzags at the end of the lines]

Parky: [from o.c.] … two long lines… [all four draw two longer lines at the end of the zigzags, followed by a small line to connect them]

All four: [from o.c.] …and a stripe down the middle! [all four draw a line inside the straw]

[Cut to a close-up of the four as they ponder what the answer to Blue’s Clues is]

Steve: Hmm… So what does Blue want with her snack? Blue’s first clue was a… uh…

Kid: A cup!

Steve: Right! A cup! [The camera turns up slightly as Steve’s drawing of the cup rises to the upper-left again as they glance at it; xylophone notes can be heard playing rhythmically. The four look back at their notebooks] And now Blue’s second clue is… a straw. [Steve’s drawing of the straw rises to the upper-right as they glance up at it; an oboe is heard playing rhythmically. They look back at the viewers] Hmm… Blue wants something to… something to…

Viewers, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [Sally, Bill, and Parky get looks of realization] Drink!

Steve: Drink! Right! With a cup [the cup drawing enlarges] and a straw! [the straw drawing enlarges] Well- well, what do you think it could be? [The viewers respond to the question]

[The camera turns down slightly as the images descend back into the notebooks]

Steve: You think we should look for our last Blue’s Clue so we can figure out what Blue wants with her snack? So do I!

Sally: Me too!

Bill and Parky: Come on! [motions the viewers to follow them again as they go o.c. right; Cut to the right side of the living room as the group looks for Blue]

Steve: [calling] Blue!

Sally: [calling] Aunt Blue!

Bill and Parky: [calling] Mom?

[Suddenly, a chorus is heard as Blue peeks her head in from o.c.]

Chorus:

♫Mail time, ♫

♫MAIL TIME! ♫

All five: The mail’s here!

[A new song starts playing as Steve, Blue, Sally, Bill, and Parky begin dancing]

Steve: ♫Here’s the mail, ♫

Sally: ♫It never fails! ♫

Bill: ♫It makes us wanna… ♫

Parky: ♫Wag our tails! ♫

All except Blue: ♫When it comes we wanna wail… ♫

All: ♫MAIL! ♫

[The music ends as the mailbox from the opening extends through the window stopping at the arms of the Thinking Chair as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky walk over there to sit down. Cut to a medium long shot of the four as they sit on the Thinking Chair next to the mailbox. The mailbox speaks with a male thick New York accent]

Mailbox: Okay, mail’s here, mail’s here! That’s me! Mail! [The mailbox opens his lid as Steve reaches inside to pull out a letter- the background color of the letter is red with a picture of an apple on the stamp, a drawing of Steve, Sally, Blue, Bill, and Parky, and an orange flap on the back; the mailbox closes his lid]

Steve: Thank you, Mailbox!

Mailbox: You’re welcome! [extends away o.c.]

Steve: [the group turns to the viewers] We just got a letter!

[Another song with the same melody of “We Are Gonna Play Blue’s Clues” begins playing as Steve swings the letter back and forth]

Steve: ♫We just got a letter, ♫

Sally: ♫We just got a letter. ♫

Bill and Parky: ♫We just got a letter, ♫

All four: ♫Wonder who it’s from? ♫

[The music ends as Steve begins to open the letter as Sally, Bill, and Parky gather around to see the letter. The letter reveals three kids at a table]

Kids: Hi, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky! We’re having snack!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers]

Steve: It’s a letter from Morgan, Perry, and Brent.

Sally: They’re some of our friends!

[Cut to a close-up of a plate of apple slices on the table; the kids grab one apple slice each]

Morgan: You know what our very favorite snack is?

Kids: [in unison] Peanut butter and apples!

[Morgan is seen trying to get the plastic knife out of the peanut butter]

Perry: I'm putting peanut butter on the apples.

Brent: [eats an apple slice] It tastes like- mmm- apple juice.

[The kids laugh as they eat their apple slices with peanut butter]

Perry: I like this snack 'cause I can do it myself. [eats her apple slice with peanut butter]

[Morgan, Perry and Brent drink their milk]

Kids: [in unison] Bye!

[Cut back to the living room with Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] Bye! [Steve closes the letter and puts it on his lap as he, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers]

Steve: I love snacks.

Sally: Don’t you?

[At the same time, Blue appears from behind the Thinking Chair and hops on an armrest; Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky see Blue run around in circles in place while humming and jumps o.c.]

[Cut to a close up of the picture of the farm from earlier as Blue lands inside; Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky rush up to the frame]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [amazed] WHOA! [the four turn to the viewers]

Steve: Did you see that?!

Sally: Aunt Blue just went right into that picture of that farm!

Bill and Parky: [in unison] That’s so cool!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn back to the picture as Blue moves o.c. right; the group of four turn back to the viewers]

Steve: Looks like Blue wants us to follow her. [cut to a wide shot of the living room]

Sally: There goes Blue!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky swing their arms as a new song begins to play]

Steve and Sally: ♫Blue skidoo, ♫

Bill and Parky: ♫We can too! ♫

[The music ends as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky jump- er, skidoo- into the picture of the farm. Cut to the four skidooing out of a picture frame on a tree that has a picture of the living room as they appear on the farm. Steve and Sally are now wearing straw hats and overalls over their shirts, while Bill and Parky just wear straw hats; a cow is heard mooing in the background along with birds tweeting as the four look around]

Steve: Wow!

Bill: What a great farm!

Parky: [to the viewers] Let’s go look around! [the group of four start walking]

Sally: The only thing that’s missing from this is some banjo music. [As if on cue, a country version of “We Are Looking for Blue’s Clues” starts playing, complete with banjo] Ah, there we go! [turns to the camera] Thanks, Nick and Mike! [turns back to the right]

[As they sing, the group of four walk past a pig jumping into a mud puddle, a fence where the snail appears yet again on one of the posts, a sheep that eats a flower]

Steve: ♫We are farming for Blue’s Clues♫

Sally: ♫We are farming for Blue’s Clues. ♫

Bill and Parky: ♫We are farming for Blue’s Clues♫

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: ♫E-I-E-I-O! ♫

Steve: ♫With a chick-chick here and a chick there♫

Sally: ♫A chick-chick here and a chick there. ♫

Bill: ♫Here a chick, ♫

Parky: ♫There a chick, ♫

Bill and Parky: ♫Everywhere a chick-chick… ♫

[The group stops walking and singing as they notice a brood of baby chickens in front of them]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [turns to the viewers] Everywhere a chick-chick! [turns back to the chicks; The group notices one of the chicks is wearing a newspaper hat as they turn back to the viewers again]

Sally: I think this little chick in the newspaper hat is trying to tell us something.

[The group walks over to the chick; cut to a medium shot of Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky sitting on the grass as the chick jumps into Steve’s hand]

Steve: Hello, little chick.

Newspaper Hat Chick: Hey, guys. Can you help me find my friend?

Sally: Okay.

Bill: What does your friend look like?

Newspaper Hat Chicken: My friend has a hat on just like mine. See?

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers]

Steve: Are you ready to help this little chick?

Sally: Then we can look for more…

Bill and Parky: Blue’s Clues.

[The newspaper hat chick hops o.c. right as the camera cuts to the chick with five other chicks wearing hats: a party hat in the upper-left, a police hat in the upper-center, a recognizable newspaper hat in the upper-right, a crown in the lower-center, and a baseball cap in the bottom-right]

Newspaper Hat Chick #1: [to the viewers] My friend has a hat on just like mine. Do you see my friend?

[The newspaper hat chick hops over to the chick with the party hat]

Kid: Uh-uh!

[The newspaper hat chick hops over to the chick with the crown]

Kid: No.

[The newspaper hat chick hops over to the chick with the baseball cap]

Kid: Uh-uh!

[The first newspaper hat chick hops over to the second newspaper hat chick]

Viewers: Yes!

[The newspaper hat chicks chirp as they hop o.c left as the camera cuts back to Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky as the chicks jump onto Steve’s hand]

Steve: See? You found your friend.

Newspaper Hat Chicks: Yes! See how we match? [the newspaper hat chicks hop o.c. right] Thank you for helping us!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky wave goodbye to the chicks as they turn to the viewers]

Steve: [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky give the viewers thumbs up] Great work!

Sally: Now we can look for more [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky do the signature move again] Blue’s Clues!

[Just then, a chick wearing a baseball cap hops into Steve’s hand]

Baseball Cap Chick: Hi, can you help me too? Can you help me my friend?

Bill: Okay. What does your friend look like?

Baseball Cap Chick: My friend has a hat like mine.

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers again]

Parky: Are you ready to help again?

Baseball Cap Chick: I sure hope you can help me.

[The baseball cap chick hops o.c. right as the camera cuts to the chick with five more chicks wearing hats: a firefighter hat in the upper-left, a recognizable baseball cap in the upper-center, a propeller beanie in the upper-right, a party hat in the lower-center, and a newspaper hat in the lower-right]

Baseball Cap Chick #1: [to the viewers] I sure hope you can help me. Do you see my friend?

[The baseball cap chick hops over to the chick with the party hat]

Kid: No!

[The baseball cap chick hops over to the chick in the newspaper hat]

Viewers: No!

[The baseball cap chick hops over to the chick in the propeller beanie]

Kid: Uh-uh.

[The first baseball cap chick hops over to the second baseball cap chick]

Viewers: Yes!

[The baseball cap chicks chirp as they hop o.c left as the camera cuts back to Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky as the chicks jump onto Steve’s hand]

Parky: See? You found your friend too.

Baseball Cap Chicks: See how we match? Thank you for helping us.

Bill: Oh, you’re welcome.

[The baseball cap chicks chirp as they hop o.c. right; Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky wave goodbye to the chicks as they turn to the viewers again]

Bill: Great job!

Parky: Now we can look for more [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky do the signature move once again] Blue’s Clue-

[Once again, another chick hops into Steve’s hand. This one is wearing a purple party hat with two blue stripes and an orange zigzag in the middle]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison, deadpan] You too, huh?

Party Hat Chick: Uh-huh. Can you help, please?

Sally: Okay. What does your friend look like?

Party Hat Chick: My friend has a hat on just like mine.

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] …has a hat on just like yours. Right, right.

Bill: I knew you were gonna say that.

Parky: Me too.

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers again]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] You ready to help again?

[The party hat chick hops o.c. right as the camera cuts to the chick with five more chicks wearing party hats: a blue hat with orange polka dots in the upper-left, a blue and purple striped hat in the upper-middle, another blue hat with orange polka dots in the upper-right, a hat that has the same pattern as the first but with orange and purple swapped in the lower-middle, and the recognizable hat looking exactly like the original in the lower-right]

Bill: [from o.c.] Uh-oh.

Sally: [from o.c.] This time, they’re all wearing party hats!

Steve: [from o.c.] Can you help find the chick with the exact same pattern on their hat?

Purple Party Hat Chick: [to the viewers] Do you see him? Do you see my friend?

[The purple party hat chick hops over to the first polka dot party hat chick]

Kid: Uh-uh.

[The purple party hat chick hops over to the reversed pattern party hat chick]

Viewers: No!

[The purple party hat chick hops over to the second polka dot party hat chick]

Kid: Uh-uh.

[The first purple party hat chick hops over to the second purple party hat chick]

Viewers: Yes!

[The party hat chicks chirp as they hop o.c left as the camera cuts back to Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky as the chicks jump onto Steve’s hand]

Steve: See? You found your friend too!

Party Hat Chicks: Thank you for helping us!

Sally: Oh, you’re very welcome.

Bill: Uh, by the way, do you think you can help us find our friend?

Party Hat Chicks: Certainly! What does your friend look like?

Steve: Well, she’s sort of a puppy about yay-high, she’s blue-

Party Hat Chicks: You mean that silly puppy on your head? [The chicks giggle as they hop o.c. right]

Parky: “On your head”? [turns to Steve] What did they mean by tha-

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky look up as the camera pans up to reveal Blue wearing a straw hat on Steve’s head]

Steve: What’s up, Blue?

Blue: Oh, just me. [Blue jumps off Steve’s head o.c. left as the camera cuts to a wide shot of Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky]

Bill: We better follow her again, guys.[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the camera]

Steve: [motions the viewers to follow them] C’mon!

[Banjo music plays as the group of four look for Blue]

Bill and Parky: Mom?

Steve and Sally: Blue?

[The group walk past a sheep and stop near a cow with two pawprints on it eating hay; the four are oblivious as the viewers notice the clue]

Steve: [turns to the viewers] What?

Kid: A clue!

Sally: Oh! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky rush up to the camera] Did you see a clue?

Bill: Where?

Parky: Yeah, where’s the clue?

Kid: Behind you!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn around to see the cow with the two pawprints on it as the cymbal roll is heard once more]

Bill: Oh! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers] That cow has Mom’s pawprints on it!

Sally: That must mean that cow is another one of…

Viewers, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] Blue’s Clues! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky do the signature move once more]

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky run up to the cow as the camera cuts to a close-up of the cow as the four enter the shot]

Steve: [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers] Hey, do you think Blue wants to drink a cow with her snack? [Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to Steve after hearing that]

Kid: No.

Sally: Dad, that’s ridiculous.

Bill: Really, Uncle Steve?

Parky: That doesn’t make any sense.

[The cow moos a “nope”]

Steve: Oh, right.

Parky: Well, this calls for our Handy Dandy… [the group pull out their notebooks, with Steve and Sally pulling theirs out from the front pockets of their overalls as the triangle ding is heard once more]

Viewers, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] Notebooks!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky whistle as they open their notebooks as the bass chords are heard calmly strumming once more; the four turn to the next blank pages of their notebooks as the camera cuts to a close-up of the third blank notebook pages]

Steve: [from o.c.] Okay, we got the cow’s head… [all four draw a cow’s head]

Sally: [from o.c.] …a big circle for the body… [all four draw a big circle to the lower left of their cow heads]

Bill: [from o.c.] …lines for her legs and tail… [all four draw four long lines under the body, with a smaller line to the left of the circle]

Parky: [from o.c.] …the hooves and udder… [all four draw a triangle at the end of each leg, then draw a small semicircle with three small lines]

All four: [from o.c.] …and there’s a cow! [Cut back to the cow as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky close their notebooks]

Steve: Great! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky turn to the viewers]

Sally: Hey, now that we have all three clues…

[A drum roll is heard]

Bill: …that means we’re ready to go back home to our [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky hold up their notebooks again as the triangle ding is heard once more] Thinking Chair…

Parky: …and figure out what Mom wants with her snack!

Steve: Great! [motions the viewers to follow them] Let’s go!

[Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky head o.c. left. Cut to the tree with the picture frame where Blue is waiting for them. Blue hums the song from before as she skidoos back into the living room as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky enter o.c. right. Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky scat to the song from earlier as they swing their arms again, then skidoo into the picture of the living room. Cut to the living room as the four skidoo back into the living room. Steve and Sally are wearing their regular outfits again, with Bill and Parky losing the hats.]

[Cut to a close-up of the Thinking Chair as Steve and Sally sit, with Bill on the left arm and Parky on the right arm]

Sally: Now that we’re in our Thinking Chair… [the drum roll is heard again as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky pull out their notebooks]

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] Let’s think! [the triangle ding is heard once more as they open their notebooks]

Steve: So, we need to figure out what Blue wants with her snack.

Sally: Blue’s Clues are a cup… [The camera turns up as Steve’s drawing of the cup rises to the upper-left again as they glance at it; xylophone notes can be heard playing rhythmically.]

Bill: …a straw… [Steve’s drawing of the straw rises to the middle as they glance up at it; an oboe is heard playing rhythmically.]

Parky: …and a cow. [Steve’s drawing of the cow rises to the upper-right as they glance at it; a tuba is heard playing rhythmically.]

[The four ‘hmm’ then look to the viewers]

Steve: What do you think Blue wants with her snack?

[The four ponder about the answer]

Steve: Oh! Do you think Blue wants to put the cow in a cup [the cow drawing gets stuffed into the cup drawing; Sally, Bill, and Parky get wide-eyed as Steve says this] and slurp it up with a straw? [the cow now appears as a bulge in the straw drawing; Blue pops up from behind the Thinking Chair on the right with wide eyes as well]

Sally, Blue, Bill, and Parky: [turn to Steve] WHAT?!

[The cow moos loudly]

Kid: No.

Sally, Bill, and Parky: NO!

Blue: [facepalming while shaking her head] Ay yi yi…

[The whole thing crumples up and turns back into the three clues]

Steve: No, can’t really fit a cow in a cup. [Sally, Blue, Bill, and Parky roll their eyes at this]

[The group ponders the answer]

Steve: Well, cows make the sound…

[Blue moves to the left as the cow drawing moos up close to the camera]

Steve, Sally, Bill, Parky, Viewers, and Cow: [in unison] Moo!

Steve: Right. Cows make [the cow moos up close again as Steve lowers his voice] moo sounds. [normal voice] Cows make mmm… [Steve gets a look of realization]

Viewers, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] Milk!

[The cow drawing turns into a drawing of a milk carton]

Blue: [nodding her head] That’s right!

Steve: [enthusiastic] Yes! Of course! Cows make the milk we drink! [Blue ducks back behind the Thinking Chair]

Sally: That’s the answer to Blue’s Clues!

Bill: Mom wants milk [the milk carton drawing expands] poured in a cup [the cup drawing moves underneath the milk carton as milk is poured into the cup] and she wants to drink it with a straw! [The straw drawing enters the cup of milk drawing]

Parky: [gradually] We just figured out Blue’s Clues! [The cymbal roll sound effect is heard once more as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky get up from the Thinking Chair while the camera pans back down]

[Pull back where the music starts playing the same melody from before as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky swing their arms back and forth. During the song, as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky take a couple of steps toward the camera, Blue pops up in different sides behind Steve whenever they stop and sing "Blue's Clues" and "Smart."]

Steve: ♫We just figured out Blue’s Clues♫

Blue: That’s right!

Sally: ♫We just figured out Blue’s Clues♫

Blue: Oh yeah!

Bill and Parky: ♫We just figured out Blue’s Clues♫

Blue: Uh-huh!

Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky: ♫Because we’re really smart! ♫

[As the song ends, Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky rush back to the Thinking Chair as Blue hops onto the right arm]

Steve: Hey, Blue!

Blue: Yeah, Steve?

Steve: I’m gonna pour some milk in a cup, with a straw right now and you can drink it with your snack! [rushes off to get the milk ready]

[Blue winks to the viewers as she hops o.c. left. Sally motions the viewers to follow them]

[Cut to the snack table as Blue, Sally, Bill, and Parky enter. Steve enters carrying a tray with five cups of milk]

Steve: We’re all set, Blue!

Blue: [hops up and down] Oh, boy!

Steve: Got our cups of milk with straws right here. [Cut to a close-up of Steve as Blue jumps up and licks Steve’s face] Gah- Blue- Hey- Woah- [Blue grabs the tray as Steve turns to the camera] Dogs…

[Cut to Blue, Sally, Bill, and Parky as they drink their milk]

Blue: Mmm… delicious! [smacks her lips]

[Pull back as the elephants from earlier enter while music begins to play]

Steve: Hey! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky run over to the viewers] Look who’s here! It’s the elephants! Remember how we helped paint the family?

[Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper arrive with the shaped foods]

Sally: Hey, it’s Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper! They brought the food we helped to put away.

[The chicks wearing hats enter]

Bill: Oh, look. It’s the chicks!

Parky: Remember all those hats? What a day! [Steve motions the viewers to follow them]

[Cut back to the living room as Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky enter from o.c. left]

Steve: Hey, thank you so much for all your help today! [Steve, Sally, Bill, and Parky give the viewers thumbs up as they begin to sing and dance]

Steve: ♫Now it’s time for so long, ♫

Sally: ♫But we’ll sing just one more song! ♫

Bill: ♫Thanks for doing your part, ♫

Parky: ♫You sure are smart! ♫

Bill and Parky: ♫You know with me and you, ♫

Steve and Sally: ♫And Blue, too, ♫ [Blue enters]

Viewers, Steve, Sally, Blue, Bill, and Parky: [in unison] ♫We can do anything that we wanna do! ♫

[Steve, Sally, Bill, Parky, and Blue wave goodbye as they walk back]

Steve: Bye-bye!

Sally: See you later!

Bill: Bye!

Parky: Come again!

Blue: Bye-bye!

Viewers: ♫We can do anything that we wanna do! ♫

[The camera zooms out of the house as the front door closes. Blue pops up from the left window, Sally pops out from the right window, and Bill and Parky pop out from the doggy door as they wave goodbye]

Viewers:♫We can do anything! ♫

[The page turns to the credits as Blue, Sally, Bill, and Parky pop up while the music continues. They wave goodbye during the “Created By” slide, they appear from the top upside-down during the “Starring” slide, hop in during the “Animators” credits, then pop in from the right as the “Steve and Sally’s Friends” credits appear. After the credits finish, Blue’s ball bounces in from o.c. right as the camera zooms out of the book. Blue, Sally, Bill, and Parky enter as they wink to the camera]

Blue, Sally, Bill, and Parky: Bye! [they bounce the ball o.c. left and follow it as the book closes, revealing the “Blue’s Clues” logo on the back cover]

[Fade to black as the music ends. The Nelvana logo fades in, then fades out as the Nick Jr. logo appears, then fades out as the Paramount logo appears]

The End

#blues clues #blue's clues #nickelodeon #nick jr #steve blue's clues #alternate universe #something i came up with last year #fanfic

0 notes

blakeswritingimagines · 2 years ago

Text

Kink list with Solomon

Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

He wasn't use to it at all but after some time being with you he'll understand your needs and help the best he can (holding you, praising you, snacks or drinks) didn't like it at first but learned to care for you.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His fucking hands. holy SHIT like whenever you’re giving him head he pulls you away from his cock and he just sticks his fingers in your mouth, like he thinks you’re so fucking attractive sucking on his fingers, then he’ll let you go back to his dick.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Absolutely obsessed with cumming on your face and chest, something about it gets him going again.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He really wants to trying exhibition/voyeurism but with him only watching you and giving you orders he doesn't know if he wants anybody apart of it yet.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

A couple of one night stands but nothing ever actually serious until you do, Pretty much knows what he likes.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Likes to hit it from behind, likes how animalistic and primal it feels and just loves tightly holding your hips.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He's not really goofy per say but when he's trying to fuck you in public he chuckle with you or if your freaking out that someone could catch you he'll laugh.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Due to his own personal likes he's decently groomed and will do the up keep and yes it matches his hair color.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

If it's a special occasion or you ask it of him he'll head on deliver it to you on a sliver platter but on his own time once in a red moon he'll purposely choose a more easy-going time with you.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

When single every once in a while however upon meeting you he'll jerk it to the thought of something you did or wore and normally at his desk or on his bed.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Honestly I think he'd be super into shibari and learns how to make the prettiest ropes, loves seeing you tied up like that and at his mercy

Consensual voyeurism/mutual masturbation watching you get off if he's in the room or not he loves it.

Okay loves fucking you in public and covering your mouth to keep you quite while he absolutely destroys you.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

His room, empty class room, in public, somewhere in Lord Diavolo's castle.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Certain kinda touches he'll give you (his hand on your lower back, wiping off your lower lip).

Listening to you beg and nearly cry for him to touch you.

You trying to make him jealous just gives him all the more reason to go harder on you pretty baby.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Daddy kink, he personally doesn't like it he's more of a sir or master kinda man but if you really like it he'll let you moan it under him.

Scat and oddly enough food play.

Him being the sub or without power while yes you can be on top but you'll never be in charge of him.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Will go down on you and do A damn good job of course but mostly prefers you going down on him especially if your under his desk or under a table where nobody can see you.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He's very in the moment so typically fast and rough he can't help but love how you feel around him but of course if the moment calls for it he can be super sweet and slow.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

After a enough time in devildom and talking to Asmodeus he soon enough learns all the amazing options he has to fuck you in public not just your guys dorm room and will take every chance you give him.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

This is Solomon...of course he wants to take risks however the most risky thing so far was playing around with each other during a movie night with the demon bros.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

I'd like to think 5 rounds some up against the wall, the bed, his desk, in the shower.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Yes things much like rope, ribbons, candles, wands, vibes, everything and more under the non existing sun.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He's relentless on teasing you and gets a sick pleasure at reducing you to a whimpering and crying mess either with him doing too much or not enough.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He's not extremely loud or anything but he will groan, curse, and softly growl under his breath if he's not talking dirty in your ear.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

He wants to make a few sex tapes with you especially when you both have to go back home and don't live near each other but he's also thought about making a sex account with you.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

7 and a half inches no more no less and he knows what he's doing.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Pretty well controlled and will/has used his magic to make it lower considering he wasn't interested or with anyone before he didn't see a point for it.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Will take care of you but after that and if your good he'll hold you in his arms and close his eyes unless you tell him that you need something he's not moving.

#obey me shall we date #obey me #otome game #obey me solomon #kink list

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shadow--writer · 4 years ago

Note

Kind of hurt/comfort? Main 6 + artist MC who's frustrated about not being able to get something quite right. The classic, it's attempt number 17 and yet that hand still doesn't look like it should, so they end up glowering and cursing at the paper/canvas, doubting their abilities. (yes, yes this is a self-callout)

ugh this is a callout post to ME. And I am UPSET ABOUT IT.

smfh

Main six x MC not quite right

~~~~

Julian

Ah this lad. This lad has no idea what tf you’re doing. I’m sorry but when it comes to the art process he’s left in the dark

But he gets upsetti when you get upset at your art because it’s BEAUTIFUL TO HIM DON’T BE ANGY :((

Drags you away with a kiss to the tip of your nose (“you need cuddles and to talk this out on the couch, scat. Doctor’s orders”)

If you whine he’ll kiss you softly to get you to hush a little. You have been working on that piece for HOURS now and you need a break >:C

Will cuddle you, play with your hair, and listen to you rant because LAWD KNOWS YOU NEED IT

Not great on the art side of things, but he feels the struggle of not getting something right. Gives pretty decent advice ngl

When you get back to work he’ll pop in from time to time with something to drink or snack on and a kiss

Will sit and tell stories as you work to keep you laughing and not caring about if it’s wrong. Even if it doesn’t turn out the best he’ll love it

Asra

Would laugh at you affectionately. Ruffles your hair with a kiss, tugging whatever you’re drawing with out of your hand (getting whatever’s on it on him)

Spins you around slowly, leading you into a dance. It quickly gets heated with your anger and him helping you get it out

Would sing to you as they waltz you out of the kitchen to get some snacks

Faust would wiggle along with the two of you :D

Amazing listener with the BEST advice. Will listen to you stew about your latest piece over a nice cup of tea

Comes with you to see what’s wrong, hugging you from behind as you erase your latest attempt

He (if you ask) helps you fix it. Usually by holding your hand and guiding it. Soft kisses to the back of your ear bc u gave them access to the area >:3

If needed he’ll angry nap with you, helping you get back to it later. Sometimes it’s good to step away, or get someone else’s help (IF YOU ASK)

Nadia

GOOD LAWD SHE FEELS THAT STRUGGLE SO MUCH

Would massage your shoulders as you rant about why the other hand is bugging you so freaking much

Always there for you when you need it for this STRUGGLE BUS OF A PROJECT

Gives great advice on the subject. Always mentions to take a break and come back to it later with fresh eyes (taking a bath, sleeping, or getting something to eat are great tips)

Will wrap her arms around your waist and watch you get back to work on it. If you like, she’ll rock the two of you back and forth with a low hum

Doubt your abilities and she gets a little annoyed. You are GREAT but sometimes stuff doesn’t turn out amazing and that is OKAY

If you finish it and it still doesn’t look right she’ll drag you away for angry snuggles. It’s okay it didn’t go well, you can try again later

For now she’s gonna reward you for giving it your best shot and seeing it through :)

Muriel

I HAVE SOME SOFT HEADCANONS FOR THIS MANS BECAUSE I LOVE HIM SO STRAP IN

He would gently take your hands in his, not caring if you have paint, ink or charcoal on them

Just take you away from whatever you’re doing for some time to calm down and think things over

He makes you a nice cup of tea :], something to eat, and will just sit and listen to you complain and talk about what you’re working on

He doesn’t try to offer up stuff like “oh I’m sure it’s fine” because that’s not what you want to hear. So he suggests you take a short break for a little while

He’ll let you paint on his back, just random doodles :)

He’ll wear the doodles with pride as well. Generally he wants you away from what you’re doing to give you a bit of a break.

And don’t doubt your abilities. Even if this doesn’t turn out how you want, he’ll still think it’s beautiful

Portia

DRAGS UR ASS AWAY FROM WHAT YOU’RE DOING

You need a break. If you are cursing at the canvas her instincts kick in and she’s dragging you away

Will set up something in the garden for you to attack your frustrations on. Generally it’s a canvas and paint for you to splatter on it. It gets MESSY

She gets MESSY

And it’s CUTE

Will listen to you yell and scream about how you can’t get the other eye while you WRECK a canvas with colour and get it all over the two of you

It always ends with the two of you covered in paint and her chasing you around the garden until you’re laughing so hard you can’t breathe

And with your anger and frustration out, she’ll come join you as you get back to your piece. She’s your cheerleader!

Always there with a canvas to wreck and paint to splatter everywhere :D

Lucio

He would make something MUCH WORSE to make you feel better. A shitty drawing of him flexing? Y’all have like 80 of those now

Blocks what you’re working on with his body when he sees you frustrated (“Don’t you want to see something else artistic~?”)

Will take you to go steal treats from the kitchen as a distraction to calm you down

You’ll snack on cookies and he’ll listen to you rant :]. Ur very cute when ur frustrated. He doesn’t offer advice because he uh can’t but he’ll listen and admire you

Will doodle funny things on your arms so when you get back to drawing you have something to look at and giggle about

Loves doodling on u btw. Loves being doodled on as well

Really good at distracting you so you can get away from what you’re doing so when you come back you can see what you can do to fix it

If it still ends up poorly and you hate it....if you want a good scream he has some nice pillows to scream into

And he’ll be there for you when you try again

#the arcana #the arcana game #muriel #muriel of the kokhuri #julian devorak #asra alnazar #nadia satrinava #lucio morgasson #portia devorak #arcana headcanons #main six x mc #artist mc #my writing #headcanons #fluff

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steve0discusses · 4 years ago

Text

S5 Ep 15 Pt 2: Don’t Trust Anyone Who Wears a Floor Length Robe Over Their Casuals in Yugioh

Hey, it’s my birthday, so I’m gonna release this early because the rest of today I just have to work like an adult and that’s no fun.

In the first half of this episode we dunked the worlds smallest plane into a lake and so this second half of the episode involved the kids running as far away from their only responsible adults as they could.

Which like...took whole of less than a second for them to peace out and enter mortal danger.

...I’ve never been in a jungle in India but...I have seen the Jungle book many times...and there’s like tigers and stuff in there, right? and tons of monkeys that are hella mean? And freakin snakes? They sing jazz and scat? That’s some terrifying stuff.

Like these city kids have to learn at some point to fear the woods. But they just freakin don’t. And strangely, the most dangerous thing in these woods isn’t even a snake or something, but a human man just being as suspicious as possible lying prone on the ground.

(read more under the cut)

The card cultist happens to have a British accent, because this voice acting team freakin loves to pull out their British accents. It’s not as lowbrow as Valon, but it’s not as...well whatever Bakura is supposed to be. He’s a lot more tame than Bakura’s, but still very British.

I don’t know if this is because British English tends to be taught instead of American sounding English in many parts of India, but, most likely they just wanted to do an accent. And like...he’s an archeologist...and so the stereotype is there...but honestly, the decision of making this guy British gets weirder and weirder as this episode goes on, get ready for it. None of you are ready for what I assume is the very obvious plot twist of this freakin guy.

Catfish of the century, this freakin guy, I’m pretty sure.

Yugi immediately believes this completely out of place white British stranger in the Indian backwoods next to this inaccessible lake and immediately thinks “yes, my Grandfather crash landed in India EXACTLY where I’m standing right now, and now I must save him.”

Thankfully, Yami exists to gently and politely tell Yugi to hella stop.

Also, I like that Yugi has finally stopped wearing his school outfit out of school. But, he is instead wearing a jacket that is so close to his school outfit I honestly couldn’t tell until the end of this episode. It’s like...I think one shade more purple, it has white piping, and his undershirt has a center seam. It’s nice Yugi has 3 versions of the same black sleeveless undershirt, and this show cares enough to show that tiny factoid about Yugi’s closet.

So, because Yugi is a dumbass and Pharaoh has to just sit back and watch this happen so he can say “told you so” later, they follow this random cultist they found in the woods. Much like Hansel and Gretel, we snack on cake crumbs all the way to the witches house, which in this case, is an undiscovered monolith you would have easily seen from outer space.

HMMMMMMMMMM.

And so get ready for this:

Hey guys.

Remember how Alexander the great was buried in a pyramid?

Now because they’re name dropping Alexander, that’s actually kind of helpful, because Alexander the Great’s favorite damn horse in the entire world died while he was at war with India so he named a city after it. It’s believed to be in Punjab, which is in the Northern part of India

Which means we first of all, definitely crossed the tallest mountain range in the world to get here, and also means that we are like...in some really disputed territory of India right now, and it is crazy that these kids went here for a vacation completely unsupervised.

Another fun fact about Alexander is that when he died, it took 6 days for his body to decompose. At the time, they thought it was because he was a God (or in Yugioh’s case, Extremely Cursed) but nowadays historians think it’s because it took him 6 days to fully die. He just wasn’t dead yet. Had to give it a minute and the ancient Babylonians just got way too excited.

Anyway, Alexander super died in Babylon so I don’t know what the hell he’s doing in India. There is a fun spot in History where his body did get dragged to a couple different places, meaning we probably did lose the original Alexander and there’s a lot of people just guessing at where he ended up...but putting him clear up in India sure was a choice when one of his assumed burial sites was literally Egypt, which would be a more fitting location for a Pyramid and a more fitting location for this show.

Especially since Alexander was trying to invent a new race and culture...it seems a little strange he’d be buried in such a massive pyramid, but maybe he got a really, really good pyramid deal from the funeral home when he was like 28 and just figured he’d change it before the time he died at 32.

Which...now that I’m older than 32, how crazy is it that Alexander the Great died at freakin 32? You blink twice and you’re 32. Is history seriously trying to tell me this guy wasn’t like secretly 62? That maybe he just celebrated his 20th for like 20 years in a row as a royal mandate? I just feel like history is playing pranks on me with Alexander.

Anyway, our weird shady new archeologist guy is named Alex and so take that as you will.

I sure hope Alexander the Great was revived to wear khakis and bother children. Guy conquered the world once and was one of history’s Freakin Worst so he does deserve it, but also...it would explain why he thinks it’s normal to wear a Darth Maul robe over your business casual.

Anyway, lets enter the obvious trap pyramid.

Joey just wanted a nice time running around Northern India. He just wanted to eat some yummy chaat and look at some tourist destinations and maybe glance at a Bollywood star or two. But instead he’s gotta deal with spike floors because Yugi couldn’t say no to a cultist.

Also...one of those spikes clearly went through Tea’s feet, right? And she is absolutely fine? Just checking on Tea’s godlike strength and clearly it is still godlike.

Alex gives us a very long explanation of how he went upstairs and Grandpa went downstairs, and there was a door or something so Alex turned back around and Grandpa was gone.

All of those steps were probably plot relevant and I’ll probably forget all about it in 2 episodes.

The thing is Alex...literally thinks he evaporated. Literally thinks that. But how do you disprove it to this freakin guy who like...might have named a city after his horse once and thinks that’s a normal and acceptable thing to do?

and so Joey immediately leaps onto the haunted playing floor.

the way Yugi said this line was sort of hilarious to me so I may cap it. If I remember to do it (I’ve been a little busier lately, with things opening up, as you can tell because my update schedule is in the toilet.)

So, if Joey jumps in...everyone else has to, also.

And we say good bye to Alex and enter the new forest zone, which looks a LOT like the other forest we were just in.

Nice Protoss armor.

We get some hijinks from the local wildlife, which are all cards but real (but not real because we’re in a board game...don’t think about it) and the off brand Sheikah tablets have helpful monsters in them if you touch em.

This season may have been better off as a video game, being honest.

Joey has gone somewhere else, despite going onto the same game tile, and he’s too busy on a mountain range to really help anyone out. So he’s just gonna vibe up here for a bit.

Tea got up after this point and said along the lines of “k, what’s next?” Because mortal danger does not affect her and she fears nothing.

At a beach somewhere, Tea and Tristan spend some quality time together forming a new family with whatever these creatures are.

And Tea’s love of her winged angel comes full circle and now I will suffer this winged orb for the rest of this arc, pretty sure.

Please admire the number of belts on Tea. Her outfit is like max 00′s and I appreciate that. We’ve had a lot of questionable fashion on Yugioh, but they actually dressed Tea pretty on point this arc. Like I often feel like 00′s fashion is hard to define or describe, but it’s Tea right now. That’s it. She did it, it’s right there.

Yugi gets a new flagship card for this arc, and this time it’s Celtic Guardian. Hell why? I feel like his defining card changes every single arc, and they need to like focus and just give him one. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’s still Dark Magician...and maybe the show forgot?

Anyway, if you just got here, this is a link to read the rest:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

I think I forgot that link in the last recap because yo it’s kind of been a while since I’ve updated, I feel. (well I had a graveyard post and those don’t count really) But, we’re back, we’re still going, slowly but surely.

#YGO #yugioh #Yu gi oh #episode recap #photo recap #S5 #Ep16 #yugi muto #yami #capsule monsters #tea gardner #tristan taylor #Joey Wheeler #Alex Brisbane #Alexander the freakin great #and a pyramid in the middle of Northern India #And lets just make it an isekai for kicks

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azuls-octobussy · 3 years ago

Note

If the shipping game is still open, I'd love to participate!

(No-no characters: the freshmen lol. They're too baby for me)

I'm 5'4 and genderfluid, but I'm AFAB. I love dying my hair bright colors, and no one (including me) knows which color is next. My thighs could crush a man's head, and I'm far more heavy and muscular than my soft, smooth skin would tell you.

Personality wise, I'm an INTJ-T, meaning I love to hyper analyze things, but in social situations I'm happy to go with the flow. If I'm with people I like, I'm happy to do just about anything just about anywhere. I love people who go out of their way to spend time with me. My partners have told me "when I first met you, I thought you were weird. I still think you're weird, but that's one of the things I love about you." I also tend to give random fun facts about niche things with no prompting and no connection to the conversation we were having. I'm also quite protective over my loved ones and if they need something or are having a bad day, I will do everything in my power to make them feel more comfortable and better, and no one can stop me when I'm like this.

I love to make things, be it art, music, sculptures, or writing. I'm always making something new and I love to share it with people. I also love playing videogames, especially next to/with someone. There are actually some games I can't play alone, like Minecraft. I love to consentually fight/spar as well, but no one ever wants to with me because of how small I am, they don't believe me when I say that they won't hurt me. I also love listening to music, and I listen to all types of music.

I hate it when people wake me up without me asking them to, and I also hate it when people tell me to do something that I was already going to go do.

I'm autistic with tactile, vestibular, and proprioceptive hyposensitivity, which usually manifests in me forgetting to eat, walking into walls, LOVING my weighted blanket, spinning around in circles, almost always craving physical affection, and doing ballet in the kitchen.

As far as sexuality, I'm cool with pretty much anything. You want vanilla? Cool. You want to tie me up and fuck me until I can't walk straight? Cool. You wanna do it in a public place while you're holding my hands and soft domming me? Please do. My only big nos in the bedroom are anything unsanitary (ass to mouth, scat, things like that) and hard degradation. Beyond that I'm fine with about anything.

So *grabby hands* who do I get?

Yeah, I don’t see why not.

Hmmm. I’m feeling Lilia Vanrouge for you. World’s best bat dad is down for the hair colors! I mean have you seen his?

Swapping fun facts, holding hands, just sitting together doing your own things. You know he’s hella supportive of all your interests!

As for naughty things, Lilia isn’t a vanilla guy, but he’s down for some tender love-making. And lots of cuddly aftercare with snacks!

I hope you want a loving, supporting relationship with an adorable little imp, cause that’s who I ship you with lol

#disney's twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland #twst #shipping game #Lilia Vanrouge #twst lilia

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xxkinkyskunkxx · 4 years ago

Note

Do you have any gas/scat/stomach ache headcanons for Bruno, by chance?

Hiiii! First of all, thanks for sending this my way. I love getting asks sm! I apologize that it took a while though. Second of all, of course I do!🖤🤍

I’m going to do this in the order you said! There’ll be a blocker between each prompt in case anyone reading would like to skip over one and just to organize hehe.

[ CW for eproctophilia, coprophilia and stomach aches! ]

Bruno has a pretty basic diet, just eating what he pleases and not often worrying about repercussions. He doesn’t avoid things because he knows they’ll give him a bit of gas.

One thing that does give him trouble and he will actively however is tofu and imitation meats. (Canon? Maybe...this is on his character info card in the manga).

Growing up in a family that was farm to table style of cooking made him a bit sensitive to anything highly processed.

When he does get gas, it isn’t too awful in scent, but his farts are deep and rumbly. It’s mostly just air trapped in his gut, but boy they can be embarrassing.

Speaking of loud and embarrassing, his guts in general have a tendency of being very loud. If you have a meeting with Bruno, you will know if he had skipped breakfast beforehand or if he’s having tummy issues.

He’s fairly thin, so when he gets bloated, it is very much noticeable. It just slightly strains his suit and unzipping it at the end of the day when he’s having tummy troubles is so good.

When he needs to pass gas, Bruno tries to sit on soft cushions or pillows. The sound is the worst part of the ordeal, and soft things help muffle the brassy farts that come from him. With his gas trapped deep in the fabric, it makes the smell much stronger and very much noticeable.

Meetings with Polpo always result in a night of gas after joining the Capo in greasy pizza, snacks and wine. He always leaves the prison bloated and crop dusting on his way home to his Squad’s base.

After those meetings, Bruno is prone to needing to go ASAP. He always needs to go mid-meal when he’s had his meal, which usually results in some leg bouncing under the table. Desert is sometimes a dread.

His BMs are usually long, deep brown, soft snakes that are usually easy to pass.

He has some pretty loud farts between the different pieces, and it’s pretty embarrassing because he can’t hide them in a pillow like usual, and it’s instead amplified in the porcelain bowl.

Because of his mostly healthy diet, the smell is pretty vile, and you can definitely tell when he was in the bathroom last.

As much as he loves them, espressos go right through him! Coffee in general is a hit or miss for whether or not it will make his trip to the bathroom Hell or not.

Bruno is usually pretty quick using the restroom. He’s very busy with his duties and doesn’t have much time to spare. Plus, he gets a bit embarrassed knowing that people may be assuming he’s going number 2.

He grunts softly as he goes, shutting his eyes and relaxing. It’s a bit hard for a man in his power to relax, so that’s basically the toughest part of his BMs.

Bruno is not one to show discomfort (we watched him hide being a zombie after all).

As mentioned before, his tummy is not afraid to tell him and everyone around him when it’s upset with loud gurgles and rumbles.

Because he’s so good at hiding his tummy issues, you can basically tell he’s having an upset when he starts subtlety kneading his tummy.

Opening his suit when he’s bloated causes a big sigh of relief, he’ll sit back and just relax after a long day of being bloated once he gets to unwind and relax his suit.

Bruno is very sensitive to bad foods. If he gets food poisoning, it will never get past his stomach. It’s coming out the front end, not the back.

You know he’s struggling when he burps and belches, he literally never does this unless he’s having a real bad tummy ache.

His burps end in small groans of relief, and he usually sits back and relaxes after especially big ones.

He doesn’t usually let people cuddle up too close with him and show his vulnerable side, but he can really feel a lot of relief from a simple tummy rub.

Bruno is not one to seek comfort from others, but if you cuddle him and gently rub his taut belly, he will soon relax in your grasp and accept the love.

#epro #eproc #eproctophilia #jjba eproctophilia #fart kink #male farts #skunk headcanons #Bruno tag #corprophilia #jjba coprophillia #stomach problems #stomachaches #tummy ache #sick #sickies #burp kink #burping #burp

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queen--kenobi · 4 years ago

Text

NSFT Alphabet: Jed Olsen/Danny Johnson

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Ha! You’re probably not getting any aftercare unless he’s playing the sweet angle. If he is playing that angle, he’s going to go the whole nine yards. Bring you water and a towel and snacks. When he does that, you should be very suspicious because it means he’s absolutely up to something.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Honestly, his hands and eyes. He’s got to have a good eye to get the photographs he does, and he’s also got to have steady hands for photos. Having steady hands isn’t necessarily required for murder, but they do help. Honestly, as for you, probably legs? Idk I just can see him as a leg man

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Refuses to clean it off of you. Honestly would be the type to rub it into your skin

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Honestly would love to corrupt someone and get them to kill another person. The power trip he would get off of that would be massive.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Really experienced. He probably learned early on sex is an easy way to manipulate people and get what he wants from them, so he’s had a lot experience. He knows what he’s doing because of that

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Honestly, probably from behind with you pinned up against a mirror or a window. Window is preferable, but a mirror will do

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

For the most part serious since he usually uses sex as an ends to a means. But if it’s someone he’s less guarded around, he can be less serious but not goofy.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He’s a fucking narcissist. He’s well-groomed and looks impeccable and KNOWS it.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Intense. You are all that he is concentrating on because he knows that the better of a lay he is, the more he can manipulate someone. It can sometimes feel like you’re some sort of prey animal, which has nearly given him away a couple times.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Totally has gotten off while stalking his victims. Honestly, probably has gotten off during the actual act of killing several of them.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

*cracks knuckles*

Exhibitionism, voyeurisms, humiliation towards you, Master/slave dynamic, BDSM, blood play, biting, choking, marking, dirty talk... What am I missing?

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Anywhere the two of you could get caught. The more public the better in his eyes. Someplace a victim might see the two of you is high up there. The ideal for him is at one of his crime scenes? Honestly would love to fuck you in a puddle of blood from a slowly dying victim

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Anything that inflates his ego tbh, whether that’s verbally or a power dynamic. Seeing you fight and/or hurt someone else is a big turn on for him

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Scat and waterplay are the only two things that come to mind?

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Receiving for sure. Honestly would use the promise of giving to get you to jump through hoops for him Worse part is that he’s good at giving oral, so he knows he can get you to do almost anything if he promises it

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Again, this depends on if it’s more for fun or more for manipulation. If it’s for fun, hard and fast and rough. Expect to come out of it bleeding and sore. If it’s more manipulative, probably more slow and sensual. If it’s to manipulate you, and you know it is, it’ll be this weird mix of the two

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He’s down for it! Again, he’s into exhibitionism and understands that he’s not always going to have the time he wants in a lot of those cases.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Yes? He’s probably tried almost everything lbr And a lot of what he does he gets off on the risk of being caught, so.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

He can go for long extended round or multiple quick rounds.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Actually, yeah, he does. He prefers to use them on someone else especially the kind he can control remotely. Part of the fun is watching you jump and try to act discrete.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Oh my god???? He is the master of teasing jesus fucking christ. And he can outwait almost anyone. Trying to tease him is a losing game. And he’s a smug motherfucker about it

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He talks a lot but doesn’t get too loud? Like yeah, you can hear him and know what he’s up to, but you have to be decently close.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

He’s got cameras all around his apartment for the express purpose of having footage for “alone time”. And he’s also the type of bastard who would post revenge porn

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Long and somewhat thick

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Really high sdghfd I honestly see him as a sex fiend. He’s just got excellent control over it, so it’s kinda hard *badump tss* to tell that he’s Like That

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Oh, he doesn’t. He usually fakes sleep when he’s playing Jed and waits for the other person to fall asleep before snooping around. If he’s not playing Jed, he will just up and leave without a second thought

#jed olsen x reader #jed olsen/danny johnson x reader #danny johnson x reader #nsft #nsft alphabet #also if any of you would like some of these expanded on in terms of Triple Trouble... y'all know where to find me

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theabominableblogger · 6 years ago

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Rewatching “Gotham” S5E4

Not in chronological order, yaaaayyyy...

Also the other reaction posts for Episodes 8-10 are still a work in progress so hang on!

My sister watched it with me (as well as another episode in S5 and we both plan on watching the series finale together) so my comments will be in bold, and hers will be in regular font. Author’s notes courtesy of me will be bolded and italicized.

AN: I managed to record our reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

This is going to be fun.

“Shut up and die [Oswald].” *starts singing “Waking Up in Vegas” by Katy Perry*

You are really going to hell.

I am. It’s a curse.

*Recap shows Haven blowing up* Welp.

Ahhhh that freaking shot [of the burning teddy bear]

Hell of a shot to open with

MMMMM....

Also that one [of the people getting out]. That one’s good.

This whole opening just leaves you so numb.

Right? Holy shit.

And I do like that the other villains are so shocked and horrified at this.

Right, yeah.

Yeah, like you have Penguin and Ed and the other people are like “Oh my God...”

Yeah...

Oh you better not-

*Barbara points her gun at an unsuspecting Oswald* Oh come on, his back is turned!

Not right nooowww!

That’s bullshit!

*both look uncomfortable when we hear a baby crying in the background*

Everyone’s just kinda grabbing each other!

*grabs my sister and shakes her by the shoulders* It’s like “Jim!” “Harvey!” “Oswald!”

*one more time* “Bruce!” No, I’m kidding.

*laughs* Christ!

Yeah, whenever they use orange lighting in this show, it’s like “Ah yes, give me more!”

Except you know it means shit’s about to go down.

I know.

Or some shit has already gone down.

*Jim looks at the ruins of Haven* Shiiit...

*Harvey hands back the badge Jim gave to Will* Nooooooo....

*sighs*

Nooooo... come on. God dang it.

*Opening titles roll* So yeah, how’s that for an opening?

Noooo...

“As of now, death toll stands at 311.” Jesus!

“49 injured, more than 2 dozen left unaccounted for.” *very softly* Oh my God.

I swear to God she’s [Secretary Walker] an al Ghul somewhere.

AN: This was actually recorded a few weeks ago. Little did I know...

“But whoever destroyed that building can't destroy the hope we've built.” That’s not gonna do shit!

Yeah, that one lady in the crowd’s like “Oh my God...” SAAAME!

That’s not gonna do shit, Jim!

“How are you [Jim] gonna stop it from happening again?!?” Good question! Honestly right now, Jim, you’re not lookin’ so hot.

I know!

Luciusss!!

“Nothing makes sense anymore.” Someone say “It’s Gotham.” Please God!

“SELINA!” They just leave his [Bruce’s] ass there...

God... poor Bruce.

That’s gonna be nightmare inducing.

Yeahhh-

*Some of Ecco’s goons come in* OH NOOO COME ON!

Ohhh the Ecco goons!

Can I preemptively say “[expletive] that noise?”

*chuckles*

Also, I love this bit right here:

*laughs when Bruce tries throwing a wrench at a goon and missing him by a long shot* Worth the shot, buddy!

Ugghh, so close!

*Alfred comes to the rescue* AL-FRED!

YES!!

LET’S GO!

YESSS!

“I was afraid you didn’t get my signal. Lucius said the range was only a couple of miles.” Where’d he get that?!?

*at same time* What is that?!?

We already get that he’s Batman: he’s pulling solutions out of his ass.

It’s Lucius.

I guess.

“How did that happen?” “I [Bruce] let my guard down.” *aside* You do that a lot, buddy! You’ll do it more in the future!

“She’s [Selina] gone after Jeremiah, alone.” *silently hurrahs*

OK, why is she [Barbara] wearing like a dominatrix outfit?

I mean, her last outfit was covered in filth so... also she has Penguin’s hair.

Yeah but- the leather corset? Really? C’mon...

“We heard people talking about a shady guy working around Haven before it blew.” “This is Gotham. You’re [Barbara] gonna have to do better than ‘shady guy.’“ *both giggle*

“How about a location? A building in the northeast corner of Harlow Park. He says the guy's holed up there.” Also, they really need to release an official map for this because I have no idea where everything is.

They really need to.

Like I know that they use the actual No Man’s Land map

Right... but this continuity strays so much from regular DC continuity that not all of that might apply.

Yeah. It’s like “Oh the Soothsayers are in the Granton district in the Dark Zone” and I’m like “Well where is that?!?”

Yeah.

Amusement Mile?!? I know Ace Chemicals is in the Dark Zone.

Of course it is!

It’s near Crime Alley.

‘Course it damn well is!

But Crime Alley’s in Firefly’s zone. I think, yeah.

Que interesante...

Ohhh that lightinggg!

*Penguin and Co. wait for Jim in the precinct* Ohh c’mon... c’mon dude.

Digging the eyepatch on that guy [henchman] though

*mouths along with Oswald saying “woefully apparent”*

“…you [Jim] are outmanned, outgunned, and out of options.” *sings* OUTNUMBERED, OUTPLANNED!

Hey yo, I’m gonna need a right hand man!

*groans* I’m already dreading this.

“Take all you can carry.” Arm yourselves to the teeth. You’re gonna need it.

Also, they did not kill the dog.

Oh thank God.

Just to let you know!

“WE’RE NOT GONNA KILL THE DOG!”

TZE CHUN, THANK YOU!

“What do you [Jim] say, partner?” Don’t ever say that again.

Yee-haw.

You’ve yee-d your last haw.

*laughs*

*Ed wakes up* Nooo, who gives a shit about Ed? Who gives a shit? I don’t give a shit!

*aside* It’s gonna become a lot more important.

I like this music here [when Ed investigates the suitcase] actually

*both end up scatting it*

Just sounds like they’re banging a bunch of coconuts together.

*both sing* BIG ONES, SMALL ONES, SOME AS BIG AS YOUR HEAD!

*imitates Ed saying “I’ve been on a trip!” hand gesture included*

*both tilt our heads in unison to read the message on Ed’s hand*

“KNOWS WHAT?!?” Me.

Oh my God...

That’s the campaign poster [of Oswald] in S3!

Also I like how the cop cars have the grills and bars on the front and on the windshield.

Yeah... smart move!

“To hell with Penguin. Haven wasn't your fault.” “I [Jim] told the people it was safe. I made them into a target.” You know Penguin’s right there! He can hear you.

*One of the cop cars drive past Jim* Don’t park in the puddle! Noooo that’s what they diddd-

No they didn’t. Nevermind.

*giggles when Oswald pulls out a megaphone*

“There goes the element of surprise.” *both laugh*

Oh my God, he freaking winked at Jim! Oswald, you-

Oh noooo...

*Another shot at the group* Yep.

“We’re sitting ducks out here.” “And one Penguin. Hey Oswald, why don’t you crawl out there, grab that bullhorn, tell him to come out here quietly?” *both laugh*

*both imitate Oswald’s insulted “Yooouu…”*

“Pretty cozy up here. Thanks guys.” C’mon buddy! C’mon!

*claps hands* Give us him!

Give us the goods!

Give us!

“Zsasz?!?” Yassss....

“Oh hey guys, what’s up?” *both laugh*

Oh my God, I’ve missed him!

*Victor blows Oswald a kiss* YAASSSS!!

ZSAAAAAAAAAASZZZ...

ZSAAAAAAASZZZZ....

ZSAAAASSSZZZZ HONEY!

ZSAAAASSZZZZ!

*giggles* Yaaasss....

Oh my God what. Is that Selina?!?

No, that’s Ed.

Freakin- what is it with him and the bad disguises?!?

But like he got through the entire precinct like that!

Everyone wasn’t paying attention! If they were paying attention, they would’ve just ripped it [the blanket] off of him!

I know!

“I can still see your face.” “Not when I do this, you can’t.”

*laughs*

It’s literally that!

It is.

*Ed runs into Lucius* Ohhh yess! I really like these two interacting.

Lucius!

“I am given and I am taken. I was there from your first breath and I will follow you until your death.” Oh screw off!

Your name.

“Call it a personal matter.” I love that!

His little poses!

Yes yes!

“Well I'm [Ed] guessing you [Lucius] don't want money, because, uh, it's worthless. I don't tend to carry snacks on me. And if I had any bullets, I would just shoot you and take the folder.” I really want somebody to be like “I’ll give you a load of bullets for a box of Cheez-Its.” “DONE!”

*laughs* Would you like the other half of this cosmic brownie?

My God, THIS MAN GOES FREE!

You know who Chris Chalk kinda reminds me of? The ally guy from “Conquest of the Planet of the Apes?”

Yeah, it does...

Hari Rhodes! That’s the actor!

*giggles insanely when Ed tries to take the file from Lucius and utterly fails*

What the frick?

“I [Victor] did not make that building go boom, Jim.” *both laugh*

What a way to say that.

“You gave up any shred of honor long ago! Why should we believe a snake like you?!?” “Because I would never take credit for somebody’s else’s work?” *raises pen in air in agreement*

Well duh!”

“Is this about Sofia Falcone? You should really move past that. It’s not healthy.” *both giggle*

This man...

This man! He was probably raised in the South. He would probably go “Hey y’all! You’ve yee-d your last haw...”

Noooo noooo... he feels more like a California guy.

Yeah... *starts singing the theme song for “The OC”*

*Everyone starts firing at Zsasz* Zsasz is just like “Nope!’

“Nope!”

That’s the most casual duck. Just rolls out of the way!

Come on, Jim!

I’m kinda wondering why they never got “Um guys, there’s a freaking concrete wall between windows. He could just hide behind that!”

Or they could just like aim at an angle.

Yeah...

Get in the room!

This isn’t rocket science.

*both crack up when Zsasz goes for a drink break*

*still laughing* What an asshole!

*Jim body slams Zsasz to the ground* WHAA-

LET’S GO!

Right through the snack table!

And they destroyed his bowl of chips.

“[Victor] Glad to see you’re still with us.” This man has never given a shit in his entire life.

“Thank you, thank you. You were great. Glad there are no hard feelings.” I’ll be here all week. Try the veal!

*laughs* That was priceless.

“Allow me [Oswald] to deal with him [Victor].” No!

No!

“If he did this, I need to know if it was a part of something larger.” Jim, you’re always a part of something larger! READ THE SCENE!

Oh my God, they got Zsasz sitting in the back. Zsasz is probably gonna like try to strike up a conversation.

“So, how was life?” “Oh my God, shut up....”

It’s that bit in “Civil War:” “So you like cats.”

“Sam.”

This is Tony Stank!

*Selina follows Ecco and the new followers into the work site* Oh here we go, here we go. Here we go!

Oh Jesus... the belly of the beast.

Also, that place must smell like just terrible.

Right?!??! If this place doesn’t smell like an armpit, then...

*Sykes dies* ...oh God.

“Well, not with that attitude you’re not.” *leans far and away from screen*

Bitch.

“Everyone, let’s reach inside and dig a little deeper, shall we?” You prick.

*turns towards me* Don’t you dare [sing]

*leans away when Jeremiah licks blood off his knife* HI THANKS NO BYE!

*both groan in disgust*

YOU NASTY! YOU TWO [Jeremiah and Ecco] DESERVE EACH OTHER, ya- mmmmmm!

Honestly though, I am kink-shaming. I am kink-shaming so hard.

*chuckles* They’re carrying his [Sykes] body out in a wheelbarrow.

OK, but like the Tim Curry voice- that’s an affectation! He’s just putting that on to sound impressive.

*laughs when Jeremiah stops talking to himself and awkwardly clears his throat when Ecco walks in*

He’s like “Mm-mm! Sorry! Helloooo!”

*Jeremiah grabs Ecco by the neck to inspect her scar* Noooooo...

He’s lookin’ right at the bullet...

Eeuughh...

“Bruce Wayne, and his sidekick Curls? Or is he the sidekick?” That’s still such a great line.

“And Curls can walk. Really well. Especially… for a paraplegic.” *done*

*softly laughs in shock* Oh my God...

*Jeremiah purrs appreciatively at Ecco* How have these two not eaten each other alive at this point-

*sinks down in chair when Jeremiah dismisses Ecco* Oh my God, that was a ghost kiss! I HATE YOU!

“OK recruits, let’s do like my daddy did before my sixth birthday and move out!” *both laugh*

That is a hell of a line!

*Selina follows Ecco and her group* Yeah, you see him [Jeremiah] in the background just whip around!

Yeaahhh!

That was like a horror movie thing, where the monster just whips around. You can imagine a little scare chord in the background.

Right?!?

Also, I like how they establish that relationship in like under a minute.

Yeah...

Like yes, that is how you do it.

That was good.

Eat that, “Suicide Squad!”

“Evidence of deflagration would suggest something with a slower burn rate, like gunpowder or nitroglycerin.” “But for this level of destruction, that would require a bomb that's 20 cubic feet of explosive material.” Or a baZOOKA!

People just really love their RPGs in this show.

People just really love bazookas. Bane uses one in the Bane Red Trailer

“Man walks into a room, alone, and is later found murdered. There are no windows, and one door, which is locked from the inside.” *whispers* Toxic gas. No I’m kidding.

“The bomb was the building.” *imitates the way Ed says “the bomb”*

I love that.

*Ed and Lucius figure out how the building blew up* This makes the forensics class part of me just so happy.

“Ow! That’s a really nice table.” *both chuckle*

“We got a dozen witnesses that saw you [Victor] walk out of that building before it went kabooey.” *in unison* Kabooey.

“Hey, do you guys have any canned peaches? Man, I'd trade an arm and a leg for that right now. Not mine, somebody else's.” *both laugh*

Man, I missed him!

I know! I’m gonna miss him so much!

“And, guys, those were warning shots. I mean, if I really wanted to kill you you'd be dead.” If you guys could aim in this show.

Right?

I mean it’s not like the *pretends to shoot around something*

“If I blew up a building full of people, I would have covered every inch of my body in sweet, sweet scars.” Can we see them?

*gives me a weird look*

His scars! We only see them once [way back in S1].

I’d [Victor] let Alvarez do it. He’s handsome.” *both chuckle*

OK, but if the Gotham fandom isn’t already shipping them, I’m gonna be very disappointed.

*tries not to say anything without laughing*

Your stunned silence is very reassuring.

“Looks like you need a new suspect.” *in Southern drawl* Looks like it wasn’t Zsasz!

*Oswald arrives at the precinct* Go to hell!

I love that shot of him.

“I know the wheels of justice turn slowly, so I'm here to provide - a modicum of grease.” A what of what?

He said “grace” like “grease.”

What of what? I don’t know. I don’t know diction anymore.

“Oh, I did not expect you to go soft, Jim... Actually, I did, which is why I didn’t come alone.” OH COME ON!

*nods*

ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW?!?

“Torturing- torturing Zsasz into confessing won't give the people justice.” And it’s not a very effective way of getting answers either! Because they’re gonna say anything to make it stop.

Also, take a shot every time Oswald refers to Jim as “old friend.”

You’d be dead.

“There will be a trial!” I still really wanted an episode like the “Trial” episode from the animated series. That would have been so cool!

*waves at screen when Zsasz gets escorted out* Bye Zsasz... you’re gonna be high as a kite the next time we see you.

We see him more in this episode.

OK.

The last episode he’s in, he’s just like “Whaauggh!”

*laughs* What a way to go out though.

Harvey just tackles you?

I mean, if I’m gonna go out, I’m gonna go out high as a paper kite too.

*gives her the strangest look*

*laughs* You’re judging me so hard!

*shakes head* I can’t believe you.

I say that like I know what the hell getting high even feels like.

I love that this lazy ass [Haven bomber] just like leaves all the stuff there. He’s like “Oh, we gotta scatter it! Kick!”

“I truly hope you find whoever did this and make them pay.” So he [Ed] didn’t do it.

*shakes my head like the liar I am*

OK...

“I appreciate your help, Ed. Couldn’t have done it without you. If you tell anyone I said that, I will deny it.” *chuckles*

[Ed] You have one friend. Kind of.

He so badly wants to say “No, god dammit!” but he can’t!

Censorship!

This show isn’t rated high enough. Let Edward say [expletive]

*wheezes* He’s not that kind of person who would say that.

Oswald would!

He would. I made that meme thing!

Yeah that’s true.

Ed would catch himself and go “Oh... fart.”

“PENN, WHERE THE F-”

*both laugh*

Oh, that was brilliant*

*The crowd at the trial becomes unruly* Fight, fight, fight!

Oh God...

“Look at them, Harvey.” Not another speech!

Now see, that [mural behind the staircase in Oswald’s place] is like Bioshock! That big- isn’t there a big mural in the-

Yeahhh, in the church, yeah!

For the workforce?

I dunno, this is more like OG Bioshock instead of Bioshock Infinite.

Yeah.

Because we’re past the religious stuff.

Ohh the purple lighting behind him [Oswald].

“So, will I [Victor] be appointed a lawyer? I feel like my rights are being violated.” I mean, technically they are.

Wait, they actually have somewhere there like transcribing the whole thing [trial]!

I also like that he’s [Oswald] wearing the sash that the choir members wore.

Yep...

He [Oswald] paid off the witnesses though! This is-

No! Yeah, they said money is useless, so why would Oswald pay them off?

True... but this is obviously just a sham trial.

It is! It’s a kangaroo court. I love “The Dark Knight Rises.”

Also I like that goon in the background that looks like Neo from “The Matrix.” With the long coat- no, that’s Morpheus. Nevermind.

“It was a bomb.” *chuckles* It was a big one.

“For months now, you've been hearing me [Jim] say help is coming.” IT AIN’T!

“This is not justice.” This is where I pull out that quote from the first “Dark Phoenix” trailer and just insert it in here.

“I’ll [Oswald] consider that your [Jim’s] closing argument.” That was like his opening and closing argument!

Though it did put me in mind of a much better speech from “Camelot”: “They have forgotten justice, they want revenge, revenge the most worthless of causes.”

*Crowd calls Zsasz guilty* What the hell were you [Jim] expecting?

Welp.

And Zsasz is like “Great...” Good job, Jim!

Thanks for that, Jim!

Great job!

There is a guillotineeee!

Oh come onnn!

They probably got it from like the natural history museum.

Sheesh...

Also, why would they have a guillotine in the natural history museum of Gotham?

Because this place is [expletive] up all the way up to the ears.

“Any last words?” [Oswald] YOU PUT TAPE ON HIS MOUTH, YOU ASSHOLE!

*laughs when Victor gives his muffled last words* He’s just stalling, I love it!

“Well said.” *laughs*

*Victor gets rescued at the last minute* Ohhh ho ho ho!

Shit, that was close!

*imitates Oswald yelling “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?”

I actually really hope we see Zsasz in the time jump.

I hope so.

I will be so happy.

*Jim shoves Oswald to the ground* MOM, HE PUSHED ME!

You self-serving asshole!

“What choice do I [Jim] have? Either I let him [Victor] go, or he's dead for something he didn't do.” Either that or it’s like the final scene from “Se7en.”

*very softly* Eesh...

WHAT’S IN THE BOX?!? No. Zsasz is not up for that.

No.

I think he begrudgingly gets along with Barbara so he wouldn’t do that.

“This city will never be what you it to be, Jim. It’s always gonna belong to the bad guys… like me.” Yes.

“What?” “Yeah, what?” *scoffs in hilarity*

“Give him your gun.” OK, I hate this because Jim wants him [Victor] to shoot him.

Come on...

He wants a shootout!

��Maybe I'm just tired of listening to you, Victor.” Jim, come on!

*groans in frustration*

I like that shot though [of Victor being offered Harvey’s gun]. It’s like one of the westerns, with the blurry background.

“Do it.” No...

Jim, what are you, stupid?

*sits back in relief when Victor turns him down* Oh thank God...

“So [Victor] get the hell out of my face.” So why did he [Jim] want a shoot out? He just wanted an excuse to arrest him again?

It’s guess it’s just kind of the built up anger. Plus the fact that everything Jim has tried to do has utterly failed.

Yeah...

So he’s at the end of his rope and given up everything.

That’s true, yeah.

Ooohh that’s [the lighting for that shot of the tunnel workers walking down the hall] cool.

Yeah, where the hell is this?

I don’t know... it looks like an old parking garage.

It does!

*All the tunnel workers get knocked out* Oh dear.

*claps when Bruce emerges from the shadows and catches up to Alfred* LET’S GOOOOO! Yess!

Alfred being a badass!

*laughs when Jeremiah starts fanning himself with his hat*

*done*

*mouths along with Jeremiah’s line about the river, with eyebrows and all*

“So what do we do when we feel like giving up?” “Dig a little deeper.” *has to sit forward in an attempt not to laugh/sing*

*still done*

*eyes widen when Selina walks up to Jeremiah and stabs him*

“Deep enough?” Let’s go.

Damn.

“Well Selina, I must say-“ Yeah, the Tim Curry voice is an affectation.

Yeah.

Stab number two. Stab number three.

*in unison* Four. Five! Six. Seven. Eight. Nine.

God...

Ho-ly shit!

*Jeremiah drops to the ground* And he’s alive after that.

*shakes head*

*Selina gets hit in the head with a tool* Ohhhhhh! That oughta hurttt!

Yeah.... Jesus.

Also, you noticed like that he [Jeremiah] immediately calmed down like “Oh, it’s not Ecco, oh thank God- oh it’s just Selina.”

*laughs*

*Last shot of Jeremiah in the episode* He looks dead.

Yeah. Like how the hell did you survive getting stabbed in the stomach nine times?

Plus, in the next episode, there’s a doctor there. I think it’s some sort of surgeon.

Still though... damn...

*Ed is exhausted after climbing stairs* Mood, Ed.

“I hate stairs.” *laughs*

What a mood!

*sings* What a mood, what a mood, what a mighty big mood!

[1215] Oh Jesus...

Oh my gosh, the amount of times I’ve seen a ceramic rooster thing, ugh... that brings me back.

This poor old lady!

“You were on the roof and you had some kind of a rocket.” *softly* Oh my God...

*The old woman hits Ed over the head* HA!

*Ed starts to remember* Oh my God! He did it after all! Oh, you- eat shit, Ed!

*points at screen* Yeah that’s [the long hair and bowler hat] not a look!

*Ed blow up Haven in a flashback* Why would he even do it though?

Also, I like these Windows screensaver effects. *laughs*

Also, I wanna know how he [Ed] got the room number.

“I promise, I won't tell anybody.” “I know you won't.” Oh, c’mon, Ed!

No, c’mon! Ed, no! No no no!

*Ed shoves the witness out the window to her death* Eat shit and dieeeee...

*tries not to laugh* That’s from “Batman Forever!” Because he pushes the guy out the window in the wheelchair!

Ohhhh, eat shit and dieee-

OK, OK, here’s the thing. You’re gonna hate this ending because I hate this ending-

Oh God...

Because Jim and Barbara and it’s like-

What...

Yeah...

*yowls in frustration*

*can’t help but laugh* Same.

“[Barbara] Your tip didn't pan out.” “Well, I've got another one.” Nooo.

Jim does not need this right now.

He does not need this right now.

You’ve made a lot of shitty decisions this episode, Jim.

Yeah, everyone has. And these two have [throughout the show].

“No one knows what it’s like to be him.” *to the tune of the opening of 2001* Shuuuutttt upppp! SHUT UP!

Is this really the time for freakin’ anger sex?

I know!

“I told you to leave.” No.

*shakes head*

*both say varying degrees of “No” when Barbara gets super close to Jim*

Jim, no. No.

No.

*Jim grabs Barbara’s arm to stop her* Jim, no.

MMMMMMM!!!

*bolts out of seat when Jim and Barbara start to make out*

JIIM, COME ONNN!!!

*in the background* I’m goin’ out the window, bye!

Jim...

*comes back to seat when end titles appear* AND THAT IS THE end of the episode!

Nooooo!! Jiimmm, come on! COME ON!

3 notes · View notes

ninnieartsies · 4 years ago

Note

hello, it's the fic anon again! do you have any hard limits on the ship in terms of kinks? i wouldn't want you to be uncomfortable when i write the fics in case it gets ns//fw... i certainly would also like a background on raimundo too please (as a whole character) cause i'd be ashamed if i write him too ooc! ♥️ thank you sm for giving me permission to write about your wonderful oc too! 😭💖

sdsfllkds I’m!! 💞 💞

Hard limits would be mainly piss/scat/vomit based stuff. Other than those, I’m pretty aight! So if you wanna go wild and explore some, feel free to! òvób Rai is good for that stuff!

Okay, so I’m putting the stuff about Raimundo under a read more since it gonna be long-ish. TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR CANNIBALISM, SADOMASOCHISM, MEDICAL/INJURY DESCRIPTIONS, bad renders of SCAR PLACEMENT ART, and other stuff!!

This bastard of a man is 190,5cm (6'3’’), and he weighs 74kg (163.14 lbs). His eyes are red, and his hair is black.

He has a habit of using endearments/petnames on everyone but especially his s/o. These typically are babe, sweetcheeks, darling, my love, love, snookums, snugglebutt, and so on.

SOMEWHAT OF A TL;DR: Think the trope Grumpy/dangerous one being soft for only One Person -ship trope.

Raimundo is a cannibal vampire, which means that he eats other vampires, but will also eat humans. Human blood is like a snack for him, so it doesn’t sustain him, while vampire blood will satisfy him for three days. If he eats human flesh, he’s alright for three days, while if he ate vampire flesh he’d be good for a week.

Rai’s blood is black and tarlike, and it stinks absolutely horrible. It is especially revolting to those with a sensitive nose.

Werewolf blood will make him high (think weed usage).

He’s a sadomasochist, who has a hard time creating emotional bonds with people. But with mutual trust and enough time, anything is possible. His sadomasochism makes it that he can’t get off unless pain and/or humiliation is involved; either him receiving or giving.

He likes cats and strawberries.

Strawberries are pretty much the only thing he can eat that’s not raw (human/vampire/other) flesh, without getting sick. Anything else will get him ill.

He can eat meat that is sort of similar to that of a human, be it raw or cooked.

He can’t read or write due to his brain damage.

Enjoys being read stories to.

Rai’s kinks are basically: anything goes.

Can both top or bottom, both are fine. Though I usually have him top or Katsuk be a power bottom. But you do you!

Rai likes to sit or lay on the floor. For some reason, he finds it comfortable.

He doesn’t understand technology at all. TV and phones are filled with demons. Automatic doors are hell, and escalators are the stairs of satan.

When he’s after affection, he may squish Bakug. Think big dog thinking its a lapdog.

Bakugou is someone Rai trusts and respects immensely, and the only one he can fully relax around. This is why he may nap laying on top of him.

When Katsuki’s busy, Rai may just lay close by to him, or curled around him, as long as he can have a little bit of physical contact, then he’s happy.

Since Rai can turn into a bat, he may also hide himself under the collar of Baku’s shirt and join him on little outings. (Katsuk’s emotional support bat, lmao).

The bat size is basically big ears and a body that’s the size of your hand/palm + wing span. Black bat.

Rai’s and Bakug’s relationship is first and foremost built on mutual respect: Both are aware that they can injure each other badly or even kill each other, if something goes wrong.

He’s got a bunch of scars littering his body, most noticeable being those on his throat and over his nose.

and a burn scar in the form of a cross on his back.

Now then his personality:

Raimundo’s sense of fear has dwindled to almost nonexistent since his brain damage got severe enough. He’s very street smart, and one for close combat, and will keep going, despite getting injured in the process… Now, despite him being what you’d call an apex predator, Raimundo is clumsy when he’s somewhere comfortable. He has a tendency to trip over carpets, and fall down stairs (be it him going up or down them). But once he is outside again, and this clumsy streak is nowhere to be seen. This is because he unconsciously switches on/off his survival instinct. Out in the wild/in the cities, he has to keep an eye on the surroundings and not get caught.

Raimundo is pretty violent by nature, in addition to being reckless. He has issues in showing his feelings in other ways than being a complete asshole, or through bursts of aggression. Raimundo is not someone who’d cry, he hasn’t cried since he was a kid. When he’s sad or upset, he tends to get violent. He also has a hard time trusting anyone enough to form a relationship with them. If anyone would be interested in him enough to suggest dating, they’d need to be patient. Very patient.

He CAN love if the stars align right, and everything clicks. Once he finds his ideal mate, Raimundo is surprisingly cuddly, and he quite enjoys close contact with his SO. He is also POSSESSIVE, and will mark his chosen one often with bites. These bites will be deep and may require stitches if he is not careful enough. Rai is also not shy to show affection through kisses, and/or other means. He may also get easily jealous and act out on it. In bed, he, by default, will be rough. There will be blood involved; it’s either he or his partner that is bleeding. His partners do not have to worry, though. He does not EAT them he views as his. But he may bite too hard since he can’t control himself always due to the brain damage.

Raimundo’s possessiveness can become an issue. He does not like others touching what is his, and even less if they upset his s/o even a little.

When you reach a friend status, or a trustworthy status in general, Raimundo will be sort of pleasant to be around. He will crack jokes and he’ll even be ready to help you with stuff, if he deems you worthy of his time, more or less. Rai can and will use bad pickup lines for the heck of it if it means he can make Katsuki laugh. For example: sit next to him on the couch, and put an arm around him and say “So. Ya c’mere of’en?”

Then for the fun part! Raimundo’s medical issues.

He has BRAIN DAMAGE called CHRONIC TRAUMATIC ENCEPHALOPATHY, that has altered his personality; affects his learning, memories, fine motor skills, and causes seizures.

These seizures can last from a few seconds to a few minutes. In his case, they are unpredictable and episodic. Having lived alone for so long, he doesn’t recognize symptoms, nor does he even understand that he has a brain injury, to begin with.

(Usually, he gets a seizure when he gets overwhelmed, when it’s TOO loud, or he’s idle for too long. Having all his senses stimulated heavily at the same time, may also result in a seizure. Hitting his head or getting a hard enough blow to his head can also cause seizures.)

He thinks it’s normal to black out, be disorientated, and to have gaps in his memory. Now, encephalopathy was also triggered by Rai’s habbit to CANNIBALISM, which he picked up from his step brother. Even Raimundo’s AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR is linked to CTE. As his aggressiveness took a more active part, it in turn dwindled his self-preservation to a bare minimum. Raimundo does understand danger, but MIGHT NOT ACT like someone would expect one to.

Other symptoms in addition to the seizures are his MEMORY LOSS and TROUBLE CONCENTRATING FOR LONG PERIODS of time. He needs to take breaks or he gets frustrated, which in turn can lead to an aggressive outburst. His ABILITY TO LEARN is also affected, it being much slower than that of an average human. He, however, is stubborn so he does not easily give up, but he gets very frustrated when something doesn’t go as he hoped.

Raimundo also has some trouble with his dexterity or fine motor skills. Grasping a pencil is very hard, for example. He can’t always control the strength of his grip either, it being too loose or too strong at times. His hands also shake.

Raimundo’s use of endearments/petnames really comes down to him not bothering to remember names, since he’d probably just forget them after a bad seizure episode.

Katsuki, however, has made a lasting impression, so his name is pretty much etched into Rai’s brain and the few brain cells he got working. Rai also calls Bakugou by his given name, Katsuki.

AFTER THE SEIZURES

he is disorientated, often scared, and confused. Then he becomes lethargic and very SLEEPY. He might think he’s moving, i.e. lifting a hand, but instead, he’s just laying still. Usually, something familiar will help him to GROUND himself. A FAMILIAR VOICE or SCENT calms him down and keeps him from spiraling down into, worst-case scenario, another seizure.

If he is with someone he trusts, he will be more than happy to cuddle/hold hands/anything that offers him some sort of comfort & allows him to calm down.

Rest is important. So don’t be too surprised if he spends hours sleeping after a seizure. Depending on how bad it was it can be a short-ish nap, or he sleeps practically the whole day away.

His speech will slur, he won’t make as much sense, and his reaction time is drastically reduced. He is at his most vulnerable after a seizure.

After a seizure he may also lose memories. Sometimes he can get a fuzzy version of a memory back, but mostly they’re gone forever.

HIS VOICE

Since an incident where he was attacked by a beast (chimera), that left the scars on his throat a century ago, Raimundo’s voice has been altered. IT’S HOARSE, a little bit strained as the vocal-cords in his throat are PERMANENTLY DAMAGED despite his healing and regenerating abilities.

(The incident almost killed him, so the healing process took more priority in keeping him alive than to worry about his vocal cords.)

In order to not irritate his throat, HE DOESN’T SPEAK THAT MUCH. If he does, he has to take breaks in order to let his voice and throat rest. It is inconvenient, but he’s learned to live with it.

Some days he may opt not to speak if his throat/voice is acting up.

Raimundo also purrs when he’s content or happy. He may also hiss, growl, snarl, shriek… All of the sounds he makes will still keep the same strain. Since Raimundo originally was a human, his growls/snarls will never sound as natural as they would if they came from a wolf, for example.

SKILLS

HE CAN TURN INTO A BAT; he might “hibernate” during the coldest months

EXTRAORDINARY CLIMBING SKILLS: Climbs vertical walls like it’s nothing, and might also crawl along the ceiling. That means, he has some killer gripping force. He can also climb walls while carrying someone.

REGENERATION/FAST HEALING: depending on wounds 2 days to 4 weeks+++

“MOVING” THROUGH SHADOWS; practically just got A game in hiding in shadows, in disappears into them. As long as light doesn’t touch him, he’s practically invisible.

HAS THE STRENGTH TO BREAK BONES, with his bare hands.

EXTRAORDINARY HEARING: can in a sense see even as blind, thanks to his hearing alone (think bats and echolocation, tho not as sharp). To navigate blind, he will need a noise source.

A GOOD SENSE OF SMELL.

SPEAKS ENGLISH, AND DEMONIC/BEASTIAL LANGUAGE (albeit broken, as he can’t reach the ranges a demon/beast could).

And broken heavily accented Japanese when with Bakug. Will also mess up meanings of words, or come up with new words.

ex. fries = elongated potatoes

WEAKNESSES

HOLY WATER: burns like acid. Digested he’d cough up blood and probably his intestines, and thus die.

HOLY ARTIFACTS; can kill him if used correctly (i.e. the artifacts are made into weapons). Mostly they just give him a migraine.

SUNLIGHT: The exposed skin starts to bubble and eventually bursts open. Depending on the severity and exposure, the spot can burst into flames. Throw him into a sun-exposed area and you will practically witness him be burned alive. A very painful death.

TRAUMA TO THE HEAD: can cause him to have a seizure at worst, but at the least it makes him disorientated.

WEREWOLF BLOOD will get him high as a kite.

If one was TO KILL RAIMUNDO, you just need to pierce his heart with a weapon of your choice, or alternatively, destroy his brain. He can also bleed to death if he is not careful. But for a quick death, the two other ways are more effective.

#raimundo #bakurai fic anon #ninnieatalk #i think that pretty much covers everything regarding my rairai #if there's something else you need to know just hmu for more rai facts lmao #anon

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