#says no most of the time and never asks me. like i don't know what else i can do.
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toothfa-1-ry · 3 days ago
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WON'T YOU HOLD ME, CONSOLE ME ?
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You don't expect your boyfriend to hold you or console you when you find out your pregnant, but you also didnt expect him to leave you without a trace either
Has no correlation to the other preg!reader fic i posted !!
GENRE: angst
PAIRING: Choi su-bong x preg!reader
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"Fuck" thanos groans with his head thrown back, his hands covering his face while he steps away from you
Your hold around your stomach tightens as you don't look up, keeping your gaze at the ground
"I thought you were on that shitty pill?" Thanos glanced at you before letting out a prolonged sigh
"You know that it doesn't mean a hundred percent protection" you argue, eyebrows furrowing slightly "it's not my fault! You were the one who-"
"I know geez!"
"Then why are you getting so agitated!"
"Because" thanos spluttered "because this is a kid we're talking about"
You pause, not being able to think of anything to say back, instead retreating your eyes back at your stomach
"And it's my fucking kid. Mine" thanos points at himself in the chest
"Is that why your mad?" You hate the way your voice trembles "because it's your kid and not some random bastards on the street?"
"Watch your mouth" thanos snarls "you know it's not like that, do you want me to say that it is?"
"Ah fuck" your voice a few ratios higher than it usually was, you could feel the lump in your throat forming
Thanos sighs again, his eyes softening as he glances your face and your stomach
"Aish your fucking kidding me man, your the one who started arguing first" he grumbles annoyed, but approaches you with his arms open anyways
You push against his hold at first, anger still flaring inside of you but you end up giving in pretty fast, so desperately wanting to be held
"Are the pregnancy symptoms already kicking in?" Thanos asked while pulling your head to rest in his shoulders "what a pain" muttering under his breath
"You asshole" you sob while your hands ball into a fist
"Hey your carrying the asshole's kid, i don't think your one to speak" thanos adds in quickly, frowning "Don't make this harder than it already is"
Despite Thanos holding you in his arms, you hit him with your balled fist, your face streaming with tears
"Hey stop" thanos frowns "stop before I seriously get mad" he grips your hand "im not mad right now, but if you don't stop i will"
You sniffle softly, your head laying on his chest as his eyebrows are still furrowed with concern over the recent news of your pregnancy
"What are we gonna do?" You ask amidst sniffles
Thanos allows you to lean against him, staring at the wall of the cramped room the both of you lived in
"I dont know" he mutters "we could go to the hospital? Try for a..." his voice trails off. You knew what he was referring to
This just makes your sniffles louden even more causing him to inwardly groan, he never knew how to handle emotions as such, most of the time just shutting up and holding you or something along that line but that didn't seem to be the brightest thing to do and even Thanos knew that
"Su-bong" you whisper, your hands snaking around his waist, pressing yourself closer towards him as if to shield yourself
Thanos winces softly when he hears you call his real name, he always winces when he hears his real name.
He let's out a rough grunt of acknowledgement "What?"
"I don't think I want a abortion"
"Well fuck baby, we can't afford it either way. It was stupid of me to suggest" he lazily responds, while resting his face above your head
"We can't afford to raise it too" you murmer causing Thanos to shift uncomfortably
"I know" he snorts "fuck"
"So what will we do?"
Thanos hears the imploring tone of your voice. Most of the time he was the one asking you that question. In your relationship you were the one who took on the role of the logical one, but here you were, asking Thanos something that you both didn't know the answer to
"I'll-" thanos breathed "I'll figure something out"
You look up at him, moving your face away from his chest, your eyes pleading
"You sure you want the kid?" You ask him
"Your already pregnant anyways, i can't do anything about it"
"This isn't a joke" you retort loudly
"Your the one who said you don't want an abortion!" Thanos also raises his voice
"We can't afford it anyways you idiot!"
"Well damn, it's like i didn't just fucking say that like 5 seconds ago" he thundered which immediately cause you to tear up again
Thanos tilts his head down, pressing his lips into a tight straight line, regretting his actions almost immediately
"Hey" his voice rough and deep as he called out to you "look at me"
He purses his lips when he sees you still refusing to face him, your hands hiding your face
"Hey" he says more softly as he moves your hand away from your face "im sorry okay, cmon just look at me"
Thanos leans his head against yours while he clasps his hand around yours
"I'll figure something out" he raspily breathed out "I'll get a day job, fuck it baby, I'll get 2 day jobs"
You had no strength to talk back, choosing to silently nod
Thanos kisses your forehead while he wipes your tears away
"I said I'll figure something out, so stop your damn crying okay?" He says playfully, in an attempt to stop you from crying
You nodd slowly, causing him to smile tightly
he kneels down, facing your stomach "im sure the baby wouldn't want to hear his mom cry huh?" He announces as if though he was talking to the baby
He looks up to your face to see your face, trying to make you laugh or smile or anything at all
"You better not be a shit ass kid" thanos pokes your stomach softly "cause of you, your mom's hormones are going wild already"
"Asshole" you breathed with a laugh "im crying cause of you, fucking prick"
Thanos grins as he looks up to you, standing up he grabs your hand
"I swear" he picks your hands up, placing a soft kiss "ill figure something out for the three of us"
₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊
Finding a job was hard
Especially as a retired rapper who basically got fucking conned by some asshole on the internet
Fucking bitch
Thanos stays up awake, leaning against the wall of the trashy one room so called apartment that you both lived in.
He inhales his cyan blue vape while eyeing the cigarette burn marks that painted the wall
His head thuds against the dirty peeling wallpaper, while you layed asleep on the floor across him, only a thin blanket covering your body
A soft smile graces his features when he notices the slight swell of your stomach
That's his kid right there, that's the mother of his child right there
Thanos couldn't afford to marry your right now, he wishes he could.
Fucking hell, he couldn't even afford a shitty ring let alone a ring that you actually deserved, he'd marry you with a plastic bottle seal if he could but he knew that you deserved more,
Damn, you deserve so much better than him, so much more than what he could give you
The kid in your stomach deserved better too. His kid
Thanos's smile fades away, leaving behind a grimace when he notices that the blanket doesn't fully cover your body, noticing the colour far beyond faded and the material already thinning out
He immediately unzips his jacket, going forward to place it above your body. It was the least that he could do
Suddenly, a piece of paper falls out of the pocket, he notices it as the card from the strange man earlier
Just thinking about it pissed him off, he recieved more slaps than money
Holding the card in his hand, he turns it over, mouthing the number behind the card, he swallows nervously unlike him while contemplating whether it was worth calling
Slowly typing in the digits in his phone he places his device on his ear, holding his breath as the phone rings
Once, twice, the phone continues to ring, thrice, now going four times
Thanos sighs, bringing the phone down, ready to press cancel when suddenly
"In order to sign up to play the game, please submit your name and date of birth"
Thanos breathes sharply, his finger wavering above the cancel button while your sleeping figure which remained unaware of what raced through your boyfriend's head
"Fuck" thanos curses, he glances at you
Thanos's hands trembled as he filled in his details, his pupils dilated, his mouth dried.
He knew what you'd say if you were awake, scolding him for being so naive and believing but you didn't meet that strange man in the grey suit did you?
He bites his lips when he reads the address and time of where he was suppose to go, noticing that the last date of entering the so called games was the current date
"I wont be gone for long" he mutters softly as he stands up, placing a kiss on your cheek before heading towards the door
He puts his old shoes on, the only branded ones he had left from back in his rapper days, the one who had picked for him, the only pair he didn't sell
He slips outside quietly, before sparring you one last glance
"Wait for me, just for a little bit" he whispered with a faint smile though it didnt quite didn't reach his eyes
He glances from your face to your stomach "your dad will be back with shit ton of money, i'll make sure you both live well"
He pauses before closing the door, contemplating for a minute, it felt so wrong to leave just like that,
He didn't want to go, it felt like the wrong thing to do but he steps out of the house anyway
"Take care of your mom when I'm gone"
₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊
The next morning, you wake up warmer than you usually do, but you can't ignore the ever so persistent pounding of your heart
Your heart feels heavier than usual too
Noticing your boyfriend's jacket wrapped around you, you slowly wake up, looking for him
You look for him for the entire day,
it soon turns into 2 days and 2 days soon turn into 2 weeks
The bruise you recieved earlier that day after being chased down the street by some debt collectors begun to sting.
They didn't care whether you were pregnant or not, they just wanted the money you had borrowed from them back
And then that's when it hits you
When your standing on top cold floor of, with only your boyfriend's jacket left as a reminder of him,
He left.
He left without saying anything, without leaving even a single trace, he left not even with a single goodbye
He left you.
Your hand trails to your stomach.
He left the both of you
You sink down, legs giving out as your body trembles, you lie on the wilting cot that served as a place of comfort, sobbing, shrieking, crying his name out
Screaming anything that would have send him running towards you,
But no one comes.
Unbeknownst to you, at the very same time you fall on the ground, thanos's cold body is lifted up from the cold bathroom floor and packed into black coloured coffin
His eyes still wide open, his entire body covered in his own blood
When the guards strip his clothes away, they find something in his pocket
A plastic ring
it couldn't have been worth much, maybe from a kids toy, it left the guards puzzled
What would a person like Thanos be doing with a plastic ring in his pocket?
Perhaps you would understand it better
After all, he held you, consoled you. That prick even left you without a single trace
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dollishmehrayan · 2 days ago
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# “THE WOMAN WAS TOO STUNNED TO SPEAK…” ── .✦ ( batboys w an unhinged!reader and blunt!reader )
a/n: this is from my little brain of mine , and I like to honor it for @kyriakis anywhoo I’m back and omg 1k?! Alsoo guys dw! I’m gonna do the event tomorrow && I’m gonna pick out some prompts I have organized, so i didn't forget okay but i just got a lot of DMs asking when I’m gonna do it for you guyss so yeah it’s gonna be tomorrow since I’m gonna re-edit + add some ideas of your guys votes!! Tags: (batboys x unhinged!reader)
© dollishmehrayan — ( all rights reserved to me. These works cannot be reposted, translated, or modified. Thank you for understanding dollies! )
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DICK GRAYSON ── .✦
He’s always caught off guard but loves it. Your bluntness is a breath of fresh air for Dick, who’s so used to diplomatic conversations. You say whatever’s on your mind with zero filter, and he’s like, “Oh, wow. Okay. I respect it.”
Hates it when you don’t hold back with him. He’s used to being the charming, funny guy who makes everyone laugh, but you hit him with a “That was dumb, don’t do that again” and his brain short circuits for a second. “You can’t just say that!” “Why not?”
Finds it hilarious when you wreck other people’s egos. You have zero time for anyone’s nonsense, and when someone messes up, you let them know. Dick’s in the background, trying not to laugh. “Do you not think before you speak?!…” He’s always acts so shocked but hey, he’s kinda enjoying it unless it’s aimed at him. (He can’t fight verbally for the life of him without saying some cringe shit)
Doesn’t even try to change you. Dick knows what he’s getting into, and he loves you for it. He’s never going to ask you to ‘tone it down.’ He actually finds your unapologetic attitude pretty hot.
He’s 50% worried you’ll get into trouble, 50% impressed. But in the end, he’ll always back you up, saying, “She’s just honest. Get used to it.”
JASON TODD ── .✦
Finally, someone who speaks his language. Jason lives for the fact that you don’t care what people think. He loves how blunt you are, especially when you cut through the BS with the precision of a sharp knife.
Gets protective when people try to push your boundaries. If someone dares disrespect you, Jason’s the first one to step in. “You’ve got a problem with her? You’ve got a problem with me.”, “Jason that was so fucking cringey..”
Appreciates that you don't sugarcoat things for him. You’ll tell him exactly how it is, whether it’s about his attitude or a bad decision he made, and he respects it, it’s like the tt sound where “that’s when it hit me, it was the best idea I ever had..” but like this: “Not gonna lie, that was a terrible plan, Jay,” and he’ll just nod. “Fair.”
You guys have the most chaotic, weirdest conversations. It’s a mix of witty banter, ridiculous one-liners, and deadpan sarcasm. Other people can’t even keep up with the energy.
The idea of dating a ‘good girl’ never appealed to him anyway. He thrives off your unhinged energy. You’re unpredictable, and it keeps him on his toes, which he loves. “Yeah, you’re definitely not boring.” (Although the thing is he does love innocent people, like if you’re like gen clueless he wants preserve your innocence.)
TIM DRAKE ── .✦
Tim’s brain can’t keep up with you. Your blunt, no-nonsense attitude constantly makes him blink in confusion. One minute you’re casually roasting someone, and the next, you’re giving a straight-up critique of his latest plan. He’s learning that he can’t outthink you.
He admires your unapologetic honesty. Tim has a lot of internalized doubts, so watching you casually reject anyone’s judgment is a nice contrast. You don’t apologize for your thoughts, and it’s something he secretly admires.
Constantly second-guesses himself around you. Your sharp tongue makes him want to be as confident as you. He gets nervous about saying anything that might sound soft, so when he stumbles, you’re like, “What was that? I swear you just whispered something.” And he’ll blush hard, muttering an apology.
You both have a sarcastic sense of humor that others don’t quite get. You say something outrageous, and Tim will respond with the driest remark possible. People in the room often wonder if you two are joking or just genuinely a bit rude.
Not scared to call him out. When Tim’s too nice, you’ll be like, “You need to stop letting people walk all over you. Grow some teeth.” Tim won’t admit it, but that does motivate him to be a little bolder.
DAMIAN WAYNE ── .✦
Damian is a bit taken aback at first. He’s used to people being respectful or like seeing him as kinda a role model, so when you come out with a “That’s dumb, don’t even talk to me right now,” he’s not sure how to handle it. He will stand there, blinking, while processing your bluntness. (He’s too stunned to speak 😞)
Genuinely respects your forthrightness, though. “I’ll admit, I have never met someone so… honest.” He starts respecting you even more, thinking you’re someone he can’t manipulate or charm easily.
Loves that you’re as stubborn as he is. If you’re determined about something, there’s no changing your mind. You’ll fight for your opinions even if it gets you into a heated debate. And Damian’s right there with you, arguing like it’s the most fun thing in the world.
Tries to match your bluntness. “You talk too much,” he says one day, and you immediately reply, “And yet, here you are, listening to every word I say.” Damian actually pauses for a second, impressed. “Right..”
Loves how you’ll shut down his critics with zero hesitation. Someone says something disrespectful to him, and you’ll be the first to shoot back, “He doesn’t need your advice, trust me.” He’ll give you a proud little smirk. “I like the way you handle things.”
BRUCE WAYNE ── .✦
At first, Bruce is a bit disconcerted by your bluntness. Bruce’s the kind of guy who expects people to be formal and classy, and you just come in with “This entire meeting is a waste of my time. I don’t care about any of this.” He blinks, then quietly admires your bravery.
Totally respects your unfiltered honesty. Bruce has had enough of the world’s games, so when you don’t bother to pretend or hold anything back, it’s like a breath of fresh air for him.
Secretly loves when you don’t play nice." He knows you're not afraid of saying what you think, and when you call him out on his brooding or overly protective behavior, he listens. “You’re right. I’m sorry for not trusting you more.” (He totally doesn’t have a tracker on your hair clip..🥰)
You both have moments of pure savage honesty that no one else gets. There’s no need for filters, and you’ll both exchange one-liners so dry that it leaves everyone else in the room confused.
Finds it endearing when you make his plans more interesting. “This is ridiculous. Why are we doing this again?” You snap at him in a room full of his board members, and he just gives you a look that says, “I’m never apologizing for you.”
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bubblingbowie · 3 days ago
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just read your little logan smut with flower mutant!reader. ugh!! it was literally so sweet !! all the little nicknames for her “his flustered girl?” “the sweetest thing.” UGH i’m clawing my hair out it’s so good.
it made me think like what happens if he were to like overstimulate her or something. or maybe she’s had a bad day, or logan had been out on a mission and she misses him. and so when he gets back and pounds her into the mattress, bc duh obviously he missed his girl, little vines of some climbing flower wrap around his arms where he holds her, and eventually up his biceps, around his waist where they can sprawl over his abs, all of her favorite places of logan. and obviously she doesn’t realize it bc she’s too lost in how logan makes her feel and how much she missed him.
oh and maybe when she realizes, they start to retract because she’s so embarrassed !! and logan’s all like “hey, now don’t pull away from me, pretty girl,” and just kisses every inch of her and holds her close. please i’m obsessed. logan and his pretty flower girl are all i need !!!
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a/n: YALLLL she's back. i literally had a whole other fic i was writing but this ask shot me and i just had to so thank u anon :) i will post the other fic soon but for now! be kind to me work has been busy i love uuuu enjoy!
Logan Howlett x f!reader | 18+ i'll bop you between ya eyes | flower!mutant :)
you all but jump into Logan's arms. 19 hours away; of silence. it was necessary for his stupid mission but agony for his darling love back at their cabin in the woods. he couldn't even make it inside, you ran out so he wouldn't have to find you in the house. "hey, sweet-pea." he gruffs, your eyes just beaming. he sure doesn't miss the dandelions that you leave behind with each step.
"about time! you said you'd be home by ten! god i was worried sick, i-i didn't know if i should cook dinner or not so there's nothing to eat." you babble, worried and running up the wall with meaningless stress. he just watches with a keen eye.
his hand ushers to your head, petting so sweetly to calm you down. "hey. hey. 'm alright, dolly. don't even care about dinner." and then the softest kiss to your forehead. "just happy you're here." like you'd be gone when he came back.
you're relaxed in his palm, eyes glued up to him. it's like he never left you. "bought some whiskey for you though." oh he's dating an angel, he knows it. and your proud smile just sends him in a frenzy of wanting to sip and stay with you in the living room or carry you over his shoulder to your bed. he wants the latter so badly.
he chuckles lowly and wraps his big burly arms wrap around your waist, his nose nudging under your ear. "too kind to me, baby." he murmurs. your all too familiar scent envelopes him and the switch is flipped. he has you to himself again. and Logan is just sooo greedy for his girl.
greedy and impatient. he all but shoves his large backpack into the corner of your shared room before you're thrown on the gentle plushness of the comforter. and you even made the bed for him, his sweetest girl. he's panting, eyes blown while your sweater rises up on your skin. the most he can do while he's crawling towards you is press the softest pecks on your knees and the front of your calves.
"missed you so bad." you're heart flips in its place, the sight of big bad Wolverine slinking slowly up your legs worshipping every inch he saw just too much.
"it was only a day." you chuckle, a hazy grin on your lips. your hands trail down to his hair, running through it with a smile. its fuel to the fire.
there's a small nip onto your thigh from the comment. "you say that like i don't need you every fucking minute of the it." he's quick to peel off pesky clothing in the way of the grand prize. both your tops and your own shorts were laid lazily on the floor. Logan nearly ripped it all off, his teeth baring a few times with how wanton he seemed. it's just you in your cute cotton panties and he aches all over for you. "can i? christ- lemme have you dolly, please?" you gulp, cheeks red and knees weak.
"please. yes please, need you so bad" oh how you're eyes go wide when you're desperate. Logan's hand gliding up and up your abdomen, a soft gleam shown with how smooth you've stayed. fingers run over the breasts he's worshipped so many times. after all that's been done, you've stayed his sweetest girl. so sweet you'd let him fuck you silly so quickly!
🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻
"i know sweetie, so deep, ain't i? jus' feel good, petal" he cooed so sweetly with your legs on his shoulders, pressed so lean against the silk pillowcases (bought by you but loved the most by Logan).
"oh fuck! 's so good, god-!" your eyes were screwed shut. you couldn't keep up, it always happens. senses get clogged up with how his dick stretches you so nice. all you hear is the quickness of skin on skin, his movement so unforgiving. you see Logan with a slacked jaw from how sloppy he's gotten you even within the few moments he's had you back in his arms.
but what you feel? you feel heaven and light all at once. you feel loved and loving, your skin melting into his. wanting him closer. to stay. on Logan's end, he's relishing in your sweet noises. just working along to keep your legs shaking, keep those warm tears falling down your cheeks, keep those vines growing your skin onto his hands rested on your waist. Logan does a double take.
the vines. oh shit. gardening again! just like those weeks ago with the wisteria. he remembers how red you were when your eyes laid upon those flowers. poor thing, your first thought was you hurt him. sure, like your mind would ever let yourself harm him. he prays it's a normal occurrence now, maybe he's a good man after all if you're so willing. a beautiful creation he has laid out so beautifully and for him?
yeah, you're growing more for him. "thas' it dolly, just feel good. you like my cock so bad? hm?" in your head, he's just talking about how you've gone limb from how the head of his cock rams deep into what feels like your gut. makes you so dumb you nod eagerly. he grins. the vines grow and grow to where they keep his hands attached to curve of your lower back. he can't loose you in all this now, can he?
Logan's just happy you've had your eyes welted shut focused on the bliss he's giving you, moaning like it's second nature. you were a vision beyond anything he'd seen with your charming trailing plants making him keep fucking into you. even the most darling buds pop next to the leaves.
"some pretty flowers for me too, huh?" Logan curses himself for saying that when your eyes meekly open, the words unfamiliar from his lips when it came to being fucked into a mattress. and then they're quarters from there. wide and beady while watching the fruits of your labor spinning and twisting up your lovers arms while he fucks you so good.
"oh...L-Lo, ah! i'm sorry i'll stop- fuck!" you really wanted to be sorry and pitying, to cry more than you were but from sheer humiliation. not from blinding pleasure. but maybe the vines had the good idea. they're not constricting yet not too different from your clawing hands onto his back.
he simply shakes his head. "nah. nah, keep em. lemme see it all, petal, please." embarrassment subsides. it's your Logan! there's no need for it. your shoulders relax with your head lulling back into the pillow, too cock drunk to think of ever letting this stop. more vines blossom onto his broad shoulders now. he'd be covered by the end of the night at this rate. "good girl, there we go..." the vines were kind enough to let his arm bend down to your cheeks pressing haste kisses on your flushed skin, peppering and spoiling you for you compliance. always so eager to please. his filthy girl.
he's insatiable, eager for more. his hips buck into you with more intent. to push you over, to have you more intimately. or to put it plainly, to feel you cum hard on his cock. and with how you clench around him with your little noises of "ah! ah! ah!" his lips capture yours in a sloppy kiss. all teeth while he drinks in every muffled moan. you just taste like fucking candy everywhere he puts his mouth, you're magic incarnate. in all his blistering years barely alive he's never known a feeling like having you below him so desperate to have his cock.
he doesn't know it but his stroke are getting messy. he's getting close and you're right behind him, your back arching into the sheets. he has to move his hands. his knuckles feel raw where those three shiny blades seep out. Logan's all too familiar with it. though he didn't think moving your flora would be so easy when detaching his hands to avoid an accidental injury to his lady.
fingers wrap around the bed frame with another large palm cradling your head to face him. you face the foliage you've made on his shoulders, and now, his chest. what a sight. seeing the ivy leaves decorate him and his specially carved abs.
oh you were a weak woman. "fuck, 'm gonna cum! more, please gimme more-" you cry out, now pulling him in by those strong stems able to carry while buildings. no longer auto pilot. you're all too aware. he groans, eyes nearly rolling in the back of his head.
"doin' that on purpose now, bub" oh you were. you simply wanted his fat cock deeper for when he unloads inside your poor pussy. you smile with mischief. his brows furrow. his pace picks up once more, groans turning to growls while the bed shakes with the direction force from his hands. beastly man he was . "cum with me, baby. cum on this cock and i'll fill ya up. i'll get y'so full, whatever you want"
and that's was all you needed for you're poor hole to clench violently while you drip down his thighs with a broken cry out. the vines tighten then expand, crawling out onto the bed with a poof. even cuter, the flowers bloom. he relishes in seeing his girls pretty pussy make a mess on him he just needs to return the favor. feeling the subtle clenching from your orgasm, he's cumming with one last mean buck of the hips.
"fucking christ-!" his claws unsheathe into the wall, his other set of knuckles driving into the mattress next to you while he grinds slowly to dump every drop into you. his veins on his forehead nearly pop, his eyes only watching your glossy pupils zeroed on abs. so shameless you were. he pants out with his entire body breathing with him.
he settles slowly, his claws reeling back from exhaustion. your plants remain however. yet he's only settled on you. his hands begin their soothing, his thumbs caressing your cheeks while you catch your breathe. "easy now. you okay? did i hurt you at all?" your head shakes in his grasp, eyes lazily opening to meet his eyes. your poor guy, he thinks anytime those knives come out around you he'll dice you on accident.
"spooked me." you mumble, but half heartedly. the smile on your lips shows it's a joke. Logan only huffs.
"it's only hot when you loose control." you gasp, a hand playfully patting his arm clad with your leaves. he chuckles while pressing a kiss to your forehead.
his sweetest flower, back in his arms again.
🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻🪻
dt: @nervous-person @clownprinzzzz
ask for a dt ! ! ! !
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dirtylittlesecre7 · 1 day ago
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Oh my gosh— someone who writes for nam-gyu? Am I dreaming?! I CANNOT find any fics of him!! Need headcannons about him rn😩 I feel like that man would enjoy making you cry and upset, like he would grin and laugh while doing so. (Cough— Hatefuck—cough..) Just need headcannons about that man so bad😩🫣
This is actually my first time asking, so I really don't know what to say🥲 but I hope you consider this🫶🫶🫶
-🌟anon
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warning | nsfw content
word count | 0,6k
a/n | thank you so much for your request luv! I hope I could write something as you wanted
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!he's had mixed feelings from the moment he first saw you. hate? anger? like?
oh no, not like. he just hates you so much that he wants to fuck you until you know your place.
"fucking bitch."
"huh?" thanos looked at him incomprehensibly, about to turn his head to you, but nam-gyu quickly changed the subject "nothing."
!he's insanely jealous of thanos👀 even if you don't respond to his flirting, seeing a man next to you makes him angry enough. at least it gives him a reason to make you cry more.
!he should be the only one who annoys you. if he sees someone picking on you, he'll quickly intervene, at first he'll protect you from that person, but then...
"are you too stupid to not protect yourself? no. don't even think about crying." his emotionless voice makes you tremble as he watches you quickly wipe your tears away "good. don't you dare unless I make those tears flow."
!he likes to tease you until you cry because he thinks you look so beautiful with tears in your eyes. If you turn your head and try to hide your face from him, he will forcefully grab your chin and make you look at him with your eyes full of tears. you will see that he is trying to calm down by taking a deep breath because oh...you have no idea how horny he is.
!If he can't sleep at night, he will come to your bed and bother you. If he can't sleep, you can't sleep either. but strangely, talking at night is when you get along the most. guess you are both too tired to argue, but that doesn't mean he won't say a few things about you.
okay, now please hear me out..
!this man is completely clingy when he loves you, but he is also hard when he fucks you, I can't say he doesn't like slow sex, but when he can fuck you like crazy, he doesn't really think about the other option.
!I say clingy because he can never be comfortable if his hand is not on your body in some way. he has to touch you in some way so that he feels better. when you least expect it, you may find his hands on your waist pulling you closer to him "mm...look who's here?"
!If we talk about life outside of the game, you can become his only world. yes, he likes to make you cry and upset. but only you. the others have never caught his attention and they don't. he still thinks you have the most beautiful tears.
!I can't say he's very loud in bed. he'll mostly let out short gasps and short moans. he likes listening to you more, whine for him and he'll make you see stars.
!he likes to tease you and make you cum so much that you cry from sensitivity. when you beg him to stop, he just puckers his lower lip in a mocking tone.
"aw.. does it hurt? what should I do?" he leans into your ear while his fingers, which don't stop, hit the inside of your pussy hard while you just had your 3rd orgasm "Is that all you can take? c'mon.. you can give me more, hm? ah..yes don't hide your voice from me, fuck-"
!he'll run his hand over you while you're sleeping at night, sorry not sorry. when you open your eyes and notices how his fingers are expertly tangled in your wetness, he'll smirk and say "you awake? good. now you better spread your legs for me and be loud as possible."
he's obsessed with you in some way, romantic or not, and he has no plans to leave your side.
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accio-victuuri · 1 day ago
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Xiao Zhan Portrait Magazine Interview 📝
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🎤: xiao zhan, we actually filmed a cover back then in 2019, and then in interview video, we also filmed a five year video. the last sentence in that video is what do you expect xiao zhan to look like in the next five years. five years have passed now, i want to know what kind of person xiao zhan has become.
XZ: just now, during the filming process they showed me an interview from five years ago and then when i saw the ending — i think it's amazing. at that time five years felt like a long time, at that time i thought i didn't know where i would be in five years, and then what i will become. now five years have passed in the blink of an eye, i feel like something has changed but it also feel like nothing has changed. it seems like everything has undergone an subtle changes but in reality it seems that nothing has changed. it's a wonderful feeling. i can't use words nor statements such as "change" and "unchanged" and then describe it.
🎤: in those five years there will be a lot of growth. i actually want to know what do you think is your biggest growth.
XZ: i feel calm and composed. i feel like i have became a little more self-reflective.
🎤: compared to oneself — what does this self refer to?
XZ: because i have always believed in the words "self" and "freedom" i think those are very neutral word. my former self words is that we will consider all aspects to visual. as i mentioned in my previous interview — i am very concerned about how other perceive me, i care a lot about others' opinions about me. but perhaps over the past five years we have walked slowly along the way so now i think it's more about asking oneself, and then based on one's own opinions
🎤: you will have a persistence, so to be honest whether it's five years or something else do you think you have something firm that it won't change from you?
XZ: of course there will be.
🎤: what is it?
XZ: i remember i said this before — i remember a friend of mine told me "you may not know what you want, but you must know what you don't want" i think this has never changed.
🎤: what do you not want?
XZ: there are many things i don't want.
🎤: can you share with me an example?
XZ: for example — something that is luxurious but uncomfortable, or something that i feel not suitable for me.
🎤: i see, because i actually meet you now there are also quite a few changes. one of them is starting to exercise now right
XZ: yes!
🎤: and over the five years i actually want to know if have there been any changes in the control of your own body or some changes perception of body?
XZ: actually i have been working out all along. for the past exercise i may have been more pursuit to be a little thinner so there are used to be a lot of aerobic work done before, but now it's actually more about stability, to be more calm, so more importantly i did some strength training.
🎤: i feel that sometimes the passage of time also means that we grow up or even get older, so sometimes you may suddenly realize that your control over your body or your own experiences are little different from before.
XZ: just like when i just watched the interview video from five years ago then in the middle of conversation i just saw myself in the mirror i feel like it's an improved version from the past then now. is it a widened version or narrowed version. i can't say for sure. i don't know where are the subtle changes have occurred — maybe it's about appearance, then it could be the body shape or it may be a state. in every aspect i feel the person in the mirror is a plus version of myself that i just saw in the video. then if we talk about mentality, i think there have been many changes.
🎤:what you say — maybe five years about the body you just mentioned. i want to know if you have had a moment of spiritual freedom in the past five years.
XZ: the most spiritual freedom moment?
🎤: yes, the most spiritual freedom moment.
XZ: actually i feel that i have been relatively free and relaxed for a period of time. it was during joining the filming crew. on the contrary when i was on the set. i don't think it's like a job but more like creating a work — creating a character, the process of creating a character so i am actually very invested.
🎤: so you may feel that speaking of a relative freedom it's when you completely immersed yourself in this character. is it to some extent of isolation from real life. let's said like that?
XZ: it can be said like that.
🎤: i actually remember the reason why you referred to five years as it back then it's because from an ordinary person no matter what or rather entering the entertainment industry as a non actor and then during 2015 and now 5 years have passed. you have actually been in the entertainment industry for 10 years. will there be any changes in the perception of the entertainment industry.
XZ: woah it's been 10 years?
🎤: we can have a 5 years term of 15 days which is 10 years.
XZ: what changes have occurred? — i don't think there has been any change. there hasn't been any change. i think it's relatively achievable, their scope is relatively simple…yes relative simple.
🎤: do you remember the last time i asked you a question? if you are not an actor what would you do. do you remember your answer?
XZ: it's to open a bakery.
🎤: yes. be a baker. i also want to ask this question now. if one day you don't work as an actor anymore what could be your next career? or what do you want to do?
XZ: perhaps…there will still be to opening a bakery. although there may be many practical problems encountered but i still really want to (open a bakery) because i think it's a very happy thing.
🎤: and if we talk about now. does 33 years old xiao zhan have something special? for example the so-called moment of collapse? or it could be a regretful breakdown of the realm.
XZ: i think it might be when acting there are really…i don't think it can be considered a breakdown but i think it's the hurdle. you may not be able to step over but you and i will try every possible way.
🎤: you want to do it better.
XZ: yes, when encountering some obstacles during acting it may make me feel a bit overwhelmed at the moment like — "why can't i do it…" when that hurdle remained insurmountable, it's something that makes me feel a little overwhelmed.
🎤: is there a so-called moment of compromise.
XZ: i don't think it can be considered a compromise right? but i'll do as much as possible. probably the final result may not have been achieved by you today. perhaps it will be resolved by looking back at the present after a few days.
🎤: actually i think something speaking of adults is actually a process of constantly recognizing boundaries as you just said, actually sometimes the so-called compromise is also a process of recognizing the boundaries. do you have that feeling of like you suddenly realized that in all aspects you actually has boundaries there?
XZ: of course i think this can be considered a rule. you can understand it this way.
🎤: if we actually said that five years have passed what will the next xiao zhan look like? have you ever thought about what kind of xiao zhan you hope to be in five years? at that time you will be 38 years old.
XZ: what do i hope xiao zhan looks like? i hope he can have a great time.
🎤: that’s all? is there or what kind of actor will he become?
XZ: no no no…i don't hope much…i just want him to be happy, to have a very happy life.
🎤: do you still dream frequently now? what was your most recent dream?
XZ: i haven’t had a dream for a long time.
🎤: do you often suffer from insomnia?
XZ:: there might be just a little time to sleep, there is bit of difficulty.
🎤: because we often say everyone actually has their own memory building i want to know in your memory — is there a moment that leave you with a recurring memory or could it been repeatedly reminded to you.
XZ:: the last time i dreamed was probably about the place where i used to live when i was a child. it's an old residential building and then our house is on the fifth floor. i remember what the aisle looked like.
🎤: seems to have gone back again
XZ: yes, and then it's really amazing, the structure of the room, and then the people. my parents and grandparents both. everyone is still stuck in that time because it was when i was still a child.
🎤: have you ever wondered why you keep dreaming about that repeatedly?
XZ: this might feel strange but maybe to me it's bit like a safe house. yes, a safe house. this kind of existence may occur when i feel tired or unhappy. maybe, i just want to go back.
🎤: your case reminds me of my previous interview with zhu deyong. he is a taiwanese cartoonist — he said that every time he felt unsafe he will go back to his childhood house in his mind, and he will go patrol room by room then use his memory to build the entire house. he can even see the most delicate table, the chair, and all the vivid memories.
XZ: i was like this in my dream. the kitchen at home, then the restroom, the living room, the two bedrooms, the structural cabinets of the balcony, at the time even the exhaust fan that never replaced. it's either a range hood or a wonderful one — all the details are clear and precise.
🎤: will that make you feel at ease?
XZ: i don't know either but instead of getting up…after waking up there will be a little feeling of loss and melancholy.
🎤: your childhood was particularly happy.
XZ:: my childhood…it's very happy.
🎤: so to some extent that’s also a way for you to nourish yourself.
XZ: yes
🎤: because i know you were actually a designer before and then you can also draw. so do you sometimes draw things about it? for example are you still drawing now? can you draw your childhood house?
XZ: no..but you reminded me. i can give it a try
🎤: it's because i feel like you will rebuilding your memories, some kind of similarity. it is also a very good feedback for yourself.
XZ: it's very good.
🎤: actually it's been five years to some extent…family members also aging. do you have this feeling? like i feel like my parents are getting older?
XZ: i do. but every time i try to stir up emotions then do it with them and message them they will immediately jump out and say "i'm playing ball now" so i don't have time to tell them otherwise my mom and i are out on a road trip again. she will says just be good to yourself, you will feel better okay? they are…very happy.
🎤: they are doing well, so they actually don't have the anxiety of aging at all.
XZ: they are full of power. so i think they are the object of my learning.
🎤: have you asked them why do you think they have no such anxiety at all? like they should think of it.
XZ: i have no idea. so i envy them very much. i really envy them. i learn from them this mentality.
🎤: we just asked our photographer. he has had a lot of contact with you in the five past years he says he will feel your current sense of security or rather your sense of relaxation is gradually increasing especially this year. so i don't know yet if it's a cue do you think there will be something this year that will make you suddenly feel this kind of openness or relaxation?
XZ: i think it’s very subtle because i believe life is not a novel not a movie, not a script. i didn't have a suddenly awakening point right? i think it't a long process, it’s a gradual accumulation then slowly and slowly some changes occurred. so you are asked me when it all started at which moment which i don't really know. but i can only feel like i'm here right now, i don't care that much, maybe it will be better.
🎤: i remember asking you back then 'are you smiling when you're happy' you said "i can't say i'm happy but i'm lucky”
XZ: i also feel very happy now, i am very lucky now
🎤: if you say so then i was also very happy it was a perfect five years. i think if you say so are lucky and happy in five years this show you have actually gone very far in the past five years. how to say this..you may not always gone so smoothly but you really is. so it's better to it to go smoothly. i hope the next five years will be smoother.
XZ: yes, just like what i do every year. people will ask me what kind of blessings do you have for yourself in the new year or give it to someone who likes you? i will says "safe and smooth" people may think that being smooth and healthy is so simple but let's think of it carefully it's not that simple at all. it's again a wish, a blessings.
🎤: so if you want to say something to everyone in 2025…
XZ: it still the same sentence "safe and smooth" i think it's safe and smooth for now then other will come follow naturally.
🎤: alright that's all for now. i have no other questions left. i am looking forward to the next five years with you.
XZ: thank you
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estranhossonhos · 21 hours ago
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It's obviously not a requirement I look for, whenever I meet someone (friends, bf/gf, doesn't matter - I mean people I want to keep around and nourish a relationship with); but I would love to have a significant other with this kind of mindset. That cooks with joy, plans every mealtime with ease, and feeds on other people's reactions to their food. In fact, whenever I get invited to eat at someone's house, and they complain that the food didn't turn up how they envisioned, or state that «it's nothing fancy» - oh, you have no idea how moments like this warm my body, heart and soul. And I wish I was writing all of this out of nostalgia, with that magical, slow-motion like remembrance about everyone gathered around a table, enjoying themselves, talking, laughing, ... but for me, it goes beyond that.
tw: mental health + unhealthy eating patterns
I try not to feel ashamed by confessing this, but I can't help but notice how people look at me weird. It's such an automated/basic thing everyone does, and I can't do it? «What do you mean? You need food to live, yet you can't cook nor do the groceries? ». Not quite, but I do need a whole day to do it, and a few days in advance to get myself ready for this mundane task. You see, my brain shuts off whenever I look at what's inside my fridge or pantry - if there's even anything in there to begin. I simply cannot put combine ingredients like you do (and it's not due to lack of knowledge). And whenever I can, it will most likely become my go-to meal for the next few weeks. It's a logistical nightmare to even consider going out to the supermarket. Yes, I could order online - but that's another task on itself. 80% of the times this gets me so overstimulated that, I've ended up (discreetly, I hope) crying in public, on a few occasions.
Don't worry, it's not an everyday occurrence. And for better or for worse, I am too self-conscious and pragmatic for this bad habit to take over. But whenever my neurodivergent brain is going through the slumps (you know: those occasional rough patches that resurface every once in a while, sprinkled with anxiety and depression), I prefer to stay in bed, disassociate and lose track of time, with an empty stomach. Even though I merely switched that moment with another filled with more guilt and shame towards myself. And yes, that also includes going out to eat. That's why I (while trying to play it cool) usually choose what somebody else ordered, or what the waiter recommended. This way nobody suspects anything is wrong with me, right?
Now, if this all seems childish and overly dramatic, congratulations: you are a typical functioning human-being. Believe me when I say this: I feel the same way you do, whenever I hear myself complaining about this «first world problem». But unfortunately, this drains the little energy we have to navigate our daily lives as neurodivergent individuals in a neurotypical world. Especially for those with a very tight monthly budget, who live alone or share a place with people they are not close with. Just like you, I used to find unnecessary and environmentally unfriendly all of those pre-packed, peeled and/or frozen meals, veggies and fruits. Nowadays I am thankful whenever I find them, since they quite literally have saved my life multiple times. Chemicals? Not healthy? Never heard of them. I need fuel to get out of bed and to not rot away. And if that fuel is a frozen lasagne with a weird ingredient list, so be it. I promise I'll compensate in a near future, when I am mentally and physically out of the slump, and I feel capable of asking for help (if needed) or to mask myself again as a typical functioning human-being 💪 So, next time you catch yourself complaining about those «unhealthy and ready to eat meals» or any other «unnacessary invention» that promises to make someone's life easier: take a deep breath, question everything but always try to do it out of pure curiosity. This way you're always reach the correct answer, be apart of less judgemental world, with more acessibility, compassion and solidarity towards one another.
Cooking for you is my love language.
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xxmooxmooxx · 2 days ago
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irritable. ~ s.r. x fem reader.
MDNI 18+ ONLY
- told from spencer’s pov
prompt: Spencer accidentally sees y/n secret nsfw twt account and is struggling dealing with working along side her now.
warnings: angry Spence, nsfwtwt, mentions of sex, sex toys, perv! Spencer if you squint your eyes, age gap, lmk if im missing anything :)
a/n: BLURB! not a v long story. my first Spencer fic AND my first time writing smut. NOW reader and Spencer don’t hookup in this but it’s talked about quite a bit so proceed with caution loves. gimme feed back pls!!!! Lmk if you’d want a pt 2!!!
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“i can't fucking do this, y/n. We have a lot of work left to do on this case.” I say getting out of my seat and walking towards the office door. It’s just too much right now. We’ve gotten nowhere close to finding this god awful unsub. Then here is y/n smelling like cocoanut and vanilla. Looking at me… no searching my eyes for answers I don’t have. And her hair? God. It’s down. Unlike most days where she wears it pulled back.
“Spencer! What the fuck? You told me if i needed to confied or talk to someone to go to you? If thats no longer okay then just tell me. You don’t have to talk to me like this.” She says getting out of their chair and stepping in my path to the door.
Shes right. I am being a complete an total ass right now. It’s not her fault. When she started last year I did tell her to come to me and she has taken me up on that offer lots of times and I've never minded it. I don't mind it. At Least I didn’t before… I look down defeated and sigh before looking at her. “You’re right. I apologize. Please, excuse me.” I take a step to the door.
“Reid…” She grabbed my arm looking up at me. “Please. What’s going on?”
I jerked off and came multiple times to your secret twitter account, y/n. I have your body engraved into my brain. I know exactly what i’d have to do, where to touch, how to touch, where to lick and suck now from watching the videos of you playing with yourself. I cant look at you let alone work with you, without wanting to take you into an empty office and showing you all the many things about your perfect fucking body I have learned and memorize. God even now during this stressful case all I can think of is fucking you so hard over this table that you cant remember what you came in here to ask for in the first place. But I can’t say that.
“I’m… fine. Okay? Many daily things in our lives especially in this field can cause irritability, for example: we’ve been on this case for 48 hours, we’ve gotten nowhere close to a profile, no idea how to stop this unsub, exactly how many victims he has so far, which means there's gonna be more innocent people dying. So, if I'm irritable that may be the reason. Now if you excuse me i need to go look the files we found on Amy Cassandra and Olivia Hidmen.” And with that, she let me go and I made my way out.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After a long week we are finally back home. I avoided y/n as much as I could which is the only way to deal with this until I can figure out how to move on. Then of course… once we get home going out to “split” the teams favorite local bar was suggested. We all agreed to meet up in an hour, giving ourselves time to go home and get ready.
I was sitting at our usual table with Derek and Emily when y/n walked in talking with Hotch. Fuck. me. She was wearing a short, silk, black dress that was hugging her body perfectly. Her hair was down framing her face perfectly and she was wearing her glasses. Last time i saw her glasses, they were on her bed side table in the background of the video she posted, showing off her new toys a sex toy company sent her. My thoughts are interrupted by her looking at me. I can't. I turn to Emily and Derek asking to be excused before walking past y/n and out the bars glass doors.
She’s your coworker, spencer. Not only is she a coworker, shes damn near 10 years younger than you, sees you as a mentor, and trusts you. What the fuck have I done.
“Reid!” i hear yelled from behind me.
No no no no… I turn to see her jogging towards me.
“y/n please go back inside.”
“No.”
“y/n…”
“Spencer, please stop.”
“No. y/n. You. please stop. Leave me alone and go back inside with the others…” I turn to walk away. After a few paces I hear:
“I saw.”
I pause in my tracks. Looking down at my feet. I’m fucked. I take a deep breath before turning and walking back to her. “You saw what?” I say looking down at her. My voice coming out deeper than intended.
“You liking and unliking one of my post on twitter.” She says softly and almost unsure.
I dont break eye contact. I’m frozen. What am i suppose to say to that?
“Spencer, please don’t tell anyone. I’m-”
I shake my head. “I wasn’t planning on talking to anyone about this.”
“Oh… okay…” A few more moments of silence. “I’m really really fucking sorry you saw that, no one i know in person was ever meant to see it. I just do it for fun and…”
‘I cant be having this conversation right now.’ i think to myself as she continues to ramble. “y/n. Stop.”
“... i know youre probably mortified…” she continues.
“Stop.”
“... I just dont wanna lose you-”
“y/n!’ I say louder than intended as i grab her shoulders trying to get her to listen to me. Shes staring wide eyed at me, silent. I losen my grip and lead her to a near by empty stairwell. I let her go and brush her hair off her shoulders and try to straighten the straps of her dress that was underneath my hands.
“Now…” i start calmly. I see her relax more and start looking at me with curiosity. “y/n, you have no reason to be apologoizing to me. You-” i stop myself to think before i let more rambling come out of my mouth. “I should be the one apologizing to you.” I say taking a step back attempting to give her some space.
“For what?” She asked genuinely.
“For invading your privacy. I saw your account and I was intrigued then after a few moments of analizing i realized it was you. I shouldve clicked away immediately but I didn’t, I kept scrolling and looking and I’m so sorry, y/n. You’re an amazing person, agent, and friend and I’m someone you trusted and i-”
“Did you like them?” she asked bluntly looking up at me.
Spencer. Stop. you cannot entertain this.
“Yes.” I answered searching her eyes for any signs of regret or disgust.
None to be found.
She takes a step closer to me making our hight difference extremely noticeable. “Spencer,” she started softly. The sound of my name on her lips going straight to my cock. “Did you touch yourself to me?”
“I did.”
She searches my face almost the same way i did hers moments ago before she yanks me into her by my tie our lips meeting and her pulling away before I could even register what happened. I look at her as if asking if she's sure she wants this before we quickly grab each other crashing our lips together again. Our bodies moving together and our mouths hungry.
“Fuck, I need you closer.” I moan into our kiss before softly pushing her against the wall of the stairwell. My hands roaming her body until they find their way to her beautiful thighs. I yank one of her legs up by her knee taking the opportunity to get my body closer to her. I can feel her hot core against my aching cock. My hands now resting on her ass and I leave kisses along her neck.
“Fuck, I’ve wanted you to touch me like this for so long, Spencer.” She moans softly into my hair.
“Is that so?” I ask, looking up at her as I slowly drop down to my knees.
“Oh my god.” She whispers as she realizes my intentions for getting down here.
‘She’s definitely gonna believe in a god when i'm done with her.’ I think to myself as I start leaving kisses along her thighs.
“Y/n??”
We jump at Penelope’s voice we hear from around the corner. FUCK.
I immediately get back up and look at her attempting to straighten her dress and hair up. “We’re just having a conversation. Okay?” I whisper to her searching her eyes trying to keep her calm
“Okay.” She whispers back.
I nod as I take a seat on the steps crossing my arms over my knees in an attempt to hide my boner from Penelope.
“Oh my god! There you two are!” Penelope said relieved once she saw us. “Is everything okay with my two favorite nerds?”
“Yeah, just kinda debriefing the past week. It was a lot for me.” Y/n spoke up.
“Awwww okay pumpkin. If you need to take time to yourself it’s okay, everyone would understand.” She said as she pulled y/n into a hug.
“Yeah that’s probably what i'm gonna do. I need to decompress.” Y/n says in response, hugging our friend back.
“Okay baby cakes.” Garcia responded by pulling away. “What about you, my handsome wonder boy? You okay?”
“Yeah i'm good. Just got a bit overwhelmed. I’ll probably head home as well.” I say in response looking up at her from my seat on the stairs.
“Okay then my loves. I’ll go let them know.” She says as she starts to back up. “Reid, be a gentleman and make sure our sweet y/n gets home safe.” She turns and sends a winks to y/n before turning and making her way back to the bar.
“You um… maybe wanna come over and talk about everything?” I ask looking back to the beautiful woman I had in my arms moments ago.
“I would like that.”
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t-a-a-1 · 2 days ago
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More Than Meets The Eye
TFA Optimus! X F!Reader
6k
Summary: Being a rising journalist is difficult. Especially when you have to live a secret criminal life. Things get worst when you start to fall in love with your enemy, Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots and hero of Detroit City.
You believe the feelings can't be mutual. Yet, he slowly starts to notice that you are more than meets the eye.
A/N: Lots of yearning. Jealously. Enemies to lovers?? You are a journalist who is also a criminal. Idk. Takes place between Season 1 and 2 of TFA.
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Chapter 1: Ride or Die
....
Detroit City could be ugly, nasty, unhygienic, gentrified and many other things.
But never boring.
Especially with robotic aliens patrolling the streets.
    Bots that you didn't trust fully nor liked very much.
Even more, that Optimus Prime that everyone seemed to like so much.
With his red and blue colors, his helm that looks like he is always wearing a cap and straight posture that was too authoritative for your liking.
    While everyone was excited, taking pictures of the Autobots, you were there to ask the real questions. Your job as a reporter was to tell the truth and that's what you plan to do by exposing the leader of the Autobots.
"Mr. Prime, I have a question for you."
    You raised your hand, not really sure if that matters but you wanted to keep being respectful.
"Oh, yes, how can I help you, ma'am?"
    Optimus sees you walk through the crowd of people and paparazzi. Press conferences weren't unknown to him. The citizens, the reporters, the speechless mayor and his assistant that probably did everything for him.
"I've done some research and Detroit's oil supply has plummeted since your arrival to Earth. This has created a tax increase for all of Detroit's citizens. How do you respond to this?"
"Well, we do need to eat to keep helping the city," Optimus bends down to be able to speak on the mic. "But we apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused."
"If you were sorry you and your team would have already found all  the fragments of the AllSpark and departed Earth."
"How do you know about–?"
    You didn't let him finish his question as you striked with another statement.
"But no, you and the Autobots are too focused on wasting Earth's resources and playing heroes to even think of recovering your world's most powerful energy source."
"What? No, we–"
    He keeps getting interrupted by you. Although he tries to keep his cool, he wasn't in the best of moods either. Each statement you were making was ticking off his clock.
"Without mentioning that you have been spotted entering nearby natural reservation islands without the proper permissions or documentation."
"Well, yes but I thought it was fine–"
"Why would it be fine?" You look up at him. Even when you weren't very fond of the alien robots, you had to admit that they were a spectacle to look at. But you quickly shook the thought away.  "Just because you are big and dangerous you think you are entitled to cross human law?"
"Look missy, I don't know what's your problem but–"
"My problem is that you are not answering my questions."
    There's a bit of laughter coming from behind Optimus. If he had been smart enough, he could've said something along the lines of 'you aren't asking any questions, you are just saying statements.' Instead, he lashes out on you, giving you the exact reaction you wanted.
"If only you gave me time, I would respond to them!" Seeing his mistake, Optimus stands away from the pod, clearly frustrated at the situation.  "You know what, we don't have the time for this."
    Smiling Autobots was the first thing he saw as soon as he turned to look at them. He ex-vents, not wanting to deal with it.
"Autobots, transform and roll out."
.
.
.
    The abandoned building had become their home. It was big enough to have rooms for everyone. Each catering for every bot's needs. But not even the vastness of the building could sparse the leader's rising annoyance. Walking from side to side of the hangar, looking down and with a servo on his chin, he questioned the previous interaction.
    He doesn't remember seeing you before. Either that or your existence wasn't important enough for his processor to remember.
"How did that lady know about the AllSpark?" Optimus keeps walking as Bumblebee and Sari play video games on the sofa. "We haven't told anyone about the fragments."
    Hearing something being dropped, Optimus quickly turns to look at the little girl who has taken long-term residence at their base.
"Sari?" Optimus questions, getting closer to her. "Is there anything you want to say?"
"Sorry, I thought yall were going to release that information to the public soon," she plays with her thumbs, moving them in a circle in between her hands. "So, I thought, why not sell the information to a reporter? Save you guys the time!"
"Why would you do that?"
    Bumblebee questions her, he didn't know about her actions either.
"Because I need the money! If I don't have money, I can't afford food. If I don't eat, I'll die!" Sari feels threatened, especially when she sees the rest of the bots gathering around her. "And all my credit cards have been frozen ever since my dad disappeared."
    It was as if everyone had a spoken agreement. Her explanation was a very good one. Feeling shy and maybe like a burden to them, she did what any little girl would. As best as she could with the current circumstances. No one was angry at her, just worried for what this could bring to the team.
"What else have you told her?"
    Prowl asks this time, sounding as calm as ever.
"Nothing, I promise!" Sari exclaimed. "Actually, ever since I told her about my situation, she never fails to send me some money in the mail."
"Probably to gain your trust so you could later tell her more information about us," Ratchet always assumed the worst of people. A trait that no one could blame. Being a war-veteran, distrusting others was the best for survival.
"I don't think so, she just sends money. No notes, no letters, nothing."
"Whatever the situation is, we can't have her spreading misinformation about us," Bulkhead is the last to speak his mind.
"She wasn't lying, bulkhead," Optimus remembers your statements. Each of them had truth in them. "She was right. We did everything she said we did."
    As much as he wanted to reprimand the little girl, he couldn't do it. Instead he takes a few seconds to think.
"But we can't have her writing negative articles about us," he says as he takes a moment to look at his very little friend. "Especially if we plan to ask for some monetary compensation for Sari."
    He really didn't want to ask for any kind of payment from the humans. Everything he did, he did in the name of goodness and to further improve Cybertronian-Human diplomatic relationships. But Sari was part of the team and his duty as leader was to take care of everyone. And she was a helpless little girl. He needs to take care of her properly and for that he needs human currency. Not much, just whatever is needed for a human to survive. Food, maybe clothes? Water. Oxygen? Medication ... Education? Did she need that? He is not sure but maybe Sari could make him a list later.
For now, there is a reporter he needs to find.
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.
    You weren't new to doing undercover work. You enjoyed it, pretending to be someone else, getting the information you needed, then going home as if you had lived another life.
    Tonight, it was one of those nights. Where you wore heels, a skirt and a revealing top. Loose hair and lip gloss and a wing to cover your real hair color.
    During the day you were a reporter. Tonight you were a car enthusiast.
"So, would you take me?"
"A beautiful car needs a beautiful woman,"
    You had been talking with a man for fifteen minutes. It's stupid how easy it was to get a man. Just listening to them talk for ten minutes straight without talking usually does the trick.
"And you know, racing is not the only thing I am good at."
    Smiling, not because of his suggestive comment but because you were about to get what you wanted, you were about to make your way inside the car.
    Until bright lights pointing at you ruined the moment.
"What does that freak want?"
    There is a loud sound of engine coming from the large truck. Although the light was bright, you could see a few shades of blue and red.
"This is the police, stand down."
"Shit."
    The man who you were talking to didn't hesitate to turn on his car and speed up. Letting off a train of fumes and leaving you behind.
    Great, now you had to explain that you weren't a hooker but an undercover reporter to the officer.
    Except that this wasn't a cop. It wasn't even a person. But a driverless car. A bot you tragically knew too well.
"So you have come for your revenge after today's press conference?" you ask sarcastically as you begin to walk away. You raised your hand and waved from side to side."Well, you got it. Now leave me alone."
    You can hear the little 'click and clack' of your heels as they impact against the concrete ground. But close by you can still hear the roaring engines. Headlights were still pretty bright and you wondered if he understood human cues. Because this just looks like some guy harassing a woman.
"Not even a 'thank you' for saving you from that guy?" Optimus follows as he drives next to you. "I thought you would be more educated."
"Well, I didn't ask you to save me," you wanted to take bigger steps but you've been walking for so long with your heels that you can't do it anymore. "Is butting into other people's business an Autobot costume?"
"Look I am not going to fall into your tactics," he says. "I just came to say that I think we started off with the wrong pede."
"Oh? Really? Why do you think that?"
"Well, for starters, I think you have the wrong ideas about us," Optimus takes a closer look at you. Wearing a different style than what you wore this morning. "Yes you are right, sometimes we don't do the right thing. But we are new here and we don't know any better."
"So you should be excused for all actions just because of your ignorance?" you feel like you are being observed. Not in a desirable manner but rather a curious one. Optimus didn't have 'eyes' but optics. His vision is probably more enhanced, being a bot and all.  "Is that what you are saying?"
"No, I am saying that maybe you could try and understand us and be more ... lenient whenever you write about us."
"And why would I do that?" you began to feel self conscious. Miniskirts weren't your thing, you liked them but Optimus heavy optics on you wasn't the most comfortable. Maybe it was all your imagination. Besides, you doubted that Optimus could feel attraction towards a human. "Are you going to hurt me if I don't?"
"What? No!"
    You stop walking and suddenly turn to look at him.
"Then I won't change anything."
    He doesn't want to think about it too much but he feels his something inside him short-circuit. Now, he realized he had been staring at you for too long. Particularly interested in your skin. As far as he knows metal and skin don't react the same way to cold. Your material being more sensitive to climate change. He was studying you and all he concluded is that you were cold.
"Why do you care so much about what we do and don't? How does it even affect you?" his engines roar louder.  "We help the humans with crime, cleaning the streets, repairing buildings and other humiliating things without any type of compensation but I don't see you writing about that stuff!"
"Do you know what happens when you and your crew destroy a building?"
"The city repairs it."
"Yes, they do," you walk towards him, aggressively placing your hands on his door. His truck form was too large for you to reach his window. It's not like you were planning to punch him but rather make your point. "But who's money do they use to repair those damages?"
    He stays quiet and you proceed.
"The people's money," using your index finger, you keep poking at him each time you make a statement. "Ever since you and your Autobots got here, things have become way more expensive. Food, gas, bills. There are families who will be homeless because they can't afford to pay rent. All because the city is raising taxes to pay for all the damages you cause."
    His headlights blink every time you keep touching him, with every word that escapes your lips.
"It's already hard enough being a journalist in Detroit and now I have to focus on surviving too. I need to contribute good stories to the newsroom or I won't even have money to buy cigarettes."
    Then, you point off into the distance, the road is clear but dark. Only the city lights illuminated the path but everything had an eerie feel to it .
"And that guy you just scared off? He was my ticket to have a warm meal tonight and you ruined it for me."
    You take your hands off him. His headlights stop blinking.
"So, I am sorry. I am sorry I won't write about how the Autobots are Detroit's heroes and how good they are because they pick up some cans."
    You walk away. Now thinking of whether to spend your last $20 bucks on food or a taxi to take you home.
    At least you can't hear the roaring engine anymore.
As he sees you struggle to keep walking, Optimus notices your shivering. How you tried to cover your backside with your bag and how ever so often your stomach would quietly growl. Although he wasn't an expert on human biology, he knew that meant you were hungry.
    He remembers your words and then Sari's. Although you were struggling to survive, you still somehow managed to help out Sari. A job he is supposed to be doing but failing miserably.
"I– " he drives up to you again. For a second, he doesn't have anything to say. Apologizing won't help you in any way. "Is there any way I can help?"
"Well, unless you can transform into a racing car and take me to do some illegal car racing, I don't think so."
    Behind you, you hear metal shifting. Driving next to you is blue and red ... Corvette? Camaro? Ferrari? You didn't know a single thing about cars but the only thing you knew is that it was a nice looking car. Dynamic, elegant and shiny. Hot and sexy. And a beautiful car needs a beautiful girl.
"Anything else?"
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    It was 3 a.m.
A dark and isolated road on the outskirts of Detroit will be witness to your first car racing. You didn't know a single thing about cars and much less racing. But thankfully for you, your racer is a car. He should know better ... right?
    As a reporter you are supposed to blend in with the crow but with Optimus, you knew that was impossible. All eyes were on you as soon as you drove by the starting line. Wondering who had just joined the car racing scene.
"Everyone is here ... Can't we just arrest them?"
"No, I am not the police.  I am just here to report on things. To inform people this is happening."
You look around the vehicle, there was technology that Earth didn't have. There wasn't a single thing you could understand. Getting nervous, you tried to get some fresh air. Clicking a few random buttons, you hear Optimus make a few displeased growls.
"Would you stop that? You know you are touching my body, right?"
    You quickly stop, not knowing how to feel about being inside a mechanic alien.
"Can you lower the windows then? I am starting to feel a little claustrophobic."
    Optimus does as you told him and now you get a clearer view of your sides. To your right there is a white Camaro with black racing stripes. To your left, a red and white car. The fancy type which brand you didn't know nor care.
"Hey beautiful, when I win let's make out in the back of my car!"
    Hearing that comment, you tell Optimus to roll up the windows again. He quickly didn't hesitate to ask questions.
"What is make out?"
    You see another woman stand in front of the car. Holding a red handkerchief. Extremely beautiful and thin, she made walking in heels look easy. The cars start their engines and you start regretting this.
"If we win this, I'll show you."
"What do we get if we win anyway?"
    Looking at the steering wheel, you think about holding it but then again Optimus seems very decided for you not to touch him. Not wanting to make him uncomfortable, you shake the thought off your head.
"I get a good story and three thousand dollars."
"Can I have some of that money? For Sari, of course."
"Absolutely but," you look around the car, trying to look for the seatbelt. The race was about to start and you couldn't find it. "Where is the seat-"
    But the race had started, Optimus didn't listen as he sped though the road. You abruptly lay back on the seat. Making mental notes about the situation. The racers, the rules, the cars, the place.
You wished you could enjoy the excitement of the race ... if it only wasn't that your life was held by a threat.
As Optimus makes an abrupt turn, you move from one seat to the other. Almost doing a complete 360.    
"Would you care to drive more carefully?!"
    You rub your head. Feeling like a small bump on the back, you are thankful the windows are tinted dark. No one can see your humiliating falling and bumping into Optimus windows and door.
"Don't you want to win, missy?"
"I can only win if I get to the finishing line ALIVE!"
    As if he wasn't hearing you, he makes another aggressive movement. This time you end up side down, with your head on the feet rest and your legs on the passenger seat.
"THAT'S IT! I AM DRIVING!"
    You straighten up and quickly put your hands on the steering wheel, taking control of the alien mech.
"Hey, missy! Hands off the steering wheel!!"
"I'll do that when you learn how to drive!"
    You fought against his strength, as he moved himself to the opposite side. It wasn't often that you fought against an alien but if your life wasn't in danger you wouldn't do so. Watching all the cars passing by was also alarming, you weren't only going to die but also lose.
"I'll have you know my driving skills have been renowned by the Elite Guard!"
"I don't give a f–"
    He lost control, as you did. The screeching tires against the pavement could be heard as the rubber of them burned. You couldn't react as Optimus crashes against a pine tree. Hitting your head against the steering wheel, you thought you might get a concussion. However, you get enough strength to get out of the car and walk a few meters away from him. It wasn't until all the racing cars had passed you that Optimus transformed back to his robot form.
"I just got a new paint job and a polish!"
    He says as he sees some scratches on his body.
"And you almost killed me!" you put a hand on your head, it hurts as if your whole brain was pulsating. Your sight is dizzy and your body is weak. "I knew it, I knew this wouldn't work out and I still trusted you."
"We wouldn't be here if you had only kept your hands to yourself."
"No, we wouldn't be here if only you had a goddamn seatbelt?!"
    Optimus was also frustrated with the situation. Now he is too far behind to win the race and he needed the money to buy food for Sari. Not only that but after tonight he is going to have to give explanations to the rest of his team. He is probably gonna be made fun of for not having a 'leader-behavior' and they were right. Because why was he here? At first, he just wanted to help you. But it seems you don't want to nor appreciate his effort.
"And why would I? I don't let humans inside me," he points at you, unaware of your delicate state.  "Besides it's not my fault your body is so weak."
"Well, for someone who is supposed to protect life, you certainly do a great," there is clear sarcasm in your voice. You probably shouldn't be fighting against a giant robot but if he were to squish you right now, he would be doing you a favor.
"I don't even know why you are on Earth if you don't even like humans."
"Oh, I like humans, I just don't like you."
"Well, the feeling is mutual."
    You take off your heels and start walking back on the cold pavement. Feeling cold everywhere, you wonder what is going to kill you first. Hypothermia or brain damage.
"Where are you going?"
"Home."
"We are on the outskirts of the city, you'll get home by the next solar cycle if you walk."
    As much as Optimus dislikes you, he wouldn't let a lady walk alone at night.
"Let me take you home."
"No," now it hurts to breathe. You probably got a few injuries but you tried to hide the pain. The last thing you wanted was to confirm Prime's idea that you were weak. You were, but he didn't have to know. "Just leave me alone."
"Does your pride have no end?" Optimus' words weren't helping either. "Just come inside–"
    He was going to keep talking until he noticed that you had stopped walking. He sees you put a hand on your head and the other on your stomach.
    Suddenly, you lose balance and he quickly reaches a servo out to catch you. He had assumed that most humans should be warm. The coldness of your body was not common. Analyzing you, he sees that you are still breathing but unconscious. You are small on his servo and he feels as though he needs to cover you.
Maybe, you were right ... he should have let you drive.
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    There were many questions in Ratchet's processor. But seeing Optimus' worried face restrained his voice box from instigating the Prime.
"I am not an expert in human biology but my analysis says that she is dehydrated and malnourished. She probably hasn't eaten in days."
    Ratchet sees you in the medical berth. In a deep sleep and weakend, he doesn't know when you will wake up.
"Don't you think it would have been better to take her to a human medical center?"
"I thought about it but while I was driving, she woke up momentarily and asked me not to take her there."
    Optimus had assumed that the reason you didn't want to go to a 'hospital' was due that maybe you didn't have a means to pay for it. The thought alone made him spark ache, he didn't understand why humans would charge for a basic right.
"Well then, make yourself useful and bring her some warm human fuel," Ratchet says. "And maybe some human clothes with more fabric or a blanket."
    Optimus nods, but there is hesitancy. He doesn't move and Ratchet catches on this. His optics are on you as if studying you. Most obvious, there is guilt and worry. He takes a closer look at him. Some part of his paint was ripped off and his metal was scratched.
"Did anything of importance happen?"
"I tried to help her with something but things didn't occur as I planned them."
    There was something he was keeping to himself.
"Did anything else happen?"
"It's just ...," he pauses and the longer he looks at you, the more Ratchet wonders. He has known the boy for some time now. He has seen him at his best and at his worst but this is different. It's like he wants to say or do  something but he can't. Either because he is too timid or because he can't find the right words. But Optimus' eloquence was known through all of Cybertron.
"It's nothing."
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    The smell of chicken noodle soup wakes up. It is an unknown place but you feel warm. Much more than your cold, small apartment. It was a bright room, and underneath was a red, giant medical bed. A white blanket covers your body and the face of a little girl stares right at you.
"Hi!"
    You slowly stand up, your head still hurting but at least you were alive.
"Hey, kid."
    You take a better look at the place around you. At least it wasn't a hospital and for that you were thankful.
"I am Sari! And you must be (Y/N)? We exchanged Autobot information before?"
    The girl was smiling, excited to see you. By hearing her name, you immediately knew what she was referring to. A few weeks ago, you had received a letter from someone, you assumed that it was a kid due to the wacky handwriting and simple vocabulary. Nonetheless, this kid was selling Autobot information to you, some things valuable, others not so much. After learning the truth behind the kid, you decided to help her as much as you could.
"I am guessing this is the secret base of the Autobots?"
    You ask the obvious. You didn't find any other logical explanation as to why there would be such big beds and medical equipment.
"Yeah ... Please, don't tell anyone," Sari says. "Or Optimus is gonna have to threaten you."
"Well, I would like to see him try," you give the little girl a head pat. "But I promise I won't say a word, just because you ask me to."
    This would have been valuable information if it wasn't due that it didn't matter anymore. You were supposed to have a story by today and the only thing you have is a headache. Another day, another non-existent payment. You are gonna have to get used to eating air at this point.
"You should eat," Sari puts the bowl of soup closer to you. "Optimus made it for you and I helped, of course."
    After hearing his name, you quickly turn to look at the little girl. You could tell she was telling the truth but she also had a mischievous smile.
"Is there something you want to ask me?"   
    You weren't about to make a meal go to waste. Picking up the spoon, you start to dig in. It wasn't bad and you wonder if Optimus actually helped at all because you can't imagine someone who is unable to taste human food, being able to make something this good.
"Well, I was wondering ... Will you be staying with us from now on?"
"No," you simply say, too concentrated in eating to think properly. "Why are you asking that?"
"Well, do you want to?"
"Thanks for the offer but I don't think the Autobots would like me here."
"But I can get so lonely sometimes!" Sari puts puppy eyes on her face and you have to admit that it was slowly working. "I need a friend."
"You can still write to me if you would like."
"That's not enough ..."
    Suddenly, you heard loud and big steps approaching from behind you. You didn't want to think about it. If you don't see it, it's not real. But then you hear mechanics moving and you are sure that if you were to turn around, you'll find a very unpleasant faceplate.
"Sari, do not overwhelm our guests," Optimus says. "She's still recovering."
"Don't mind me, I was just leaving."
    Like an animal, you drink the last of your soup and put it next to you.
"Hey um ... About last night, I ..." He pauses and struggles with his words. "I wanted to apologize–"
"No need."
    You stand up and let the white blanket covering you slip off your body. It gets cold immediately and you are tempted to ask if you can stay with the blanket.
"Wait! If you really need to, you can stay here,"
"And become your charity project? No, thank you."
    His faceplate was still very close to yours. Now you can take a closer look at his optics.  You didn't want to admit it but they were quite beautiful. A type of blue not found on Earth. Maybe not even in the entire universe. It was unique to him and you were a bit jealous of his own individuality.
"I am just trying to help."
"I think you have helped enough," you weren't about to fall for his kindness. It was his own stubbornness that put you in this situation. That and that you haven't taken care of yourself properly but he doesn't have to know that. "If I let you help me again, then I'll for sure die."
"If only you would put your pride away, we could help each other–"
"You want to help me? Why? Because you like me? Or to subside your guilt?"
"Because it's the right thing to do."
"The right thing to do?"  You can't stand his righteousness. Pretending to be this all-good creature when you know that can't be. How good can he be when he is the cause of your misfortunes? Not only yours but to a lot of more people. The worst part of it all is that he doesn't seem to want to do anything about it. "Why don't you start by leaving my planet first then?"
    Optimus stares at you and you look back at him. It was a few seconds but to you it lasted minutes.
    He doesn't say anything but slowly moves apart from you and walks away.
You turn to look at Sari who was still sitting close by.
"Sorry you had to see that kid."
"It's alright, but can I tell you something?"
    You didn't want to be here. The sun was probably about to rise and you just wanted to go home. But you couldn't say no to the girl, she seemed too sweet and her situation was still lamentable. You nod, confirming for Sari to continue.
"I've known Optimus for a time now and I can tell you that he is not very well-versed with the ladies," she says.  "He rescued a woman once and she asked for his phone number."
    Tilting you heard, a lot of things crossed your mind. You have so many questions, especially about the kind of woman who would want a machine as something more than a friend.
"And what happened?"
"He gave it to her and she texted him," she raised a small hand, pointing up. "The text said 'Do you think I am pretty?"
"And Optimus texted back saying 'I think you look soft and squeezable. And she never texted back."
    You stopped yourself from laughing. Although a small smile left your lips. You look away for a second and then look back at the young girl.
"Optimus is good at hiding his feelings but you can tell he was sad she never texted him back."
"Why are you telling me this?"
    You finally ask, curious about the story but mostly about Sari's intentions.
"Just so you know that he can be an idiot sometimes but he has a good heart ... Well, spark," Sari's voice becomes more gentle and this caught your attention. This wasn't supposed to be a funny story and now you feel a bit shameful for laughing.
"And I think he just doesn't know how to tell you that."
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.
.
The sun was starting to come out.
You took off your heels for a little bit until the cold pavement was too much to handle for your skin.
    You weren't expecting for things to go this way. Wanting to start a new life, away from everything. It was all going smoothly until they arrived. Now you find yourself on a bench, cold and hungry. Waiting for the first bus to take you home.
How much longer did you have to endure?
    You cover your face, ashamed of yourself. Of every decision you have made in your life. This is your reality now. About to be kicked out of your apartment, without a stable job and nowhere to go. No one to talk to.
Your cellphone rings.
    Not recognizing the phone number on the screen, you were hesitant to answer but lastly, you picked it up, things can't get worse anyways.
"It was harder to get a hold of you than I thought."
You recognized that voice.
"But I am glad you are doing fine. How's the city life treating you?"
"How did you find me?"
    You ask as you look around you. No one was out yet. Just a few cars passed by and the tweets of birds could be heard.
"That doesn't matter. I called thinking you may be interested in a job."
"I am not. No matter what you say, I won't go back there."
"Are you sure? I can send you over the first half of the payment right now."
You were in desperate need. He knows that and is taking advantage of that. Your instincts  were begging you to say yes. To just do one more job, to get enough food to survive for a little while until you can get back on your feet. But ...
"I appreciate the offer. But I have to decline."
    There is a long pause.
"We'll keep in touch."
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.
.
"Still thinking about that woman?"
    When Ratchet says things like that, it's difficult not to notice the subtle hits in his voice box.
"Perhaps."
    Ratchet can tell many things from the Prime's actions. He wasn't drinking his fuel and in deep thought. At least he wasn't denying the question.
"I am sure you'll see her again," Ratchet says as he pat's Optimus' shoulder plate. "Next time ask for her number."
"It's not like that."
    His cheeks have a slight blue. Very minimal but Ratchet knows better than that.
It was a lively evening in the Autobot's base. With Bumblebee and Sari playing video games while Prowl and Bulkhead stand next to them. Optimus and Ratchet usually watch from the sidelines, never participating but just treasuring the tranquility of the moment.
"If it's not that then what is it?"
"I just ..."
    Optimus hesitates not because he didn't want to tell Ratchet but because he couldn't understand his own feelings. Was it guilt? Curiosity? It's strange and yet both emotions are something he wishes to not feel. He should be worrying about the things he can fix, people he can help.
He shouldn't think about you.
About yesterday night. About the drive back to the base. You laid on his seat, unconscious. Yet you mustered the strength to say three simple words.
"Don't leave me."
And just like that. His spark ached.
Damn you.
    He doesn't have time for this. For all he cares, he hopes to never see you again.
Because how dare you play with his feelings like that?
"I'm going for a drive."
    There was nothing else to do but ride or die.
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A/N: Here is a new story I am working on. It was really fun to write this. Thank you for all the support you have given me this far! I'll continue to write. For any ideas, comments, concerns, comments you can always message me/or inbox me here. Thank you. Also sorry for any mistakes I made. I don't proof read. Regardless, I hope you enjoy and I'll be answering comments soon!
See you in the next story!
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rowie264 · 3 days ago
Text
Jinx x jinxer!reader. First meeting
You don’t really know how you ended up like this.
Truth to be told... you never really believed in your “leader”, if Jinx could even be called that. You didn't even fully dye your hair blue like the others. Just a small strand. In your eyes, Jinx did nothing but blow up the Council and redirect the Grey to Piltover. But even then… it was enough for you to make you join “Jinxers”.
You knew her actions will cause problems to Zaun. But you were so fucking done. You were too tired of being a rug under pilties boots. And maybe that was what Zaun needed to finally reach point of no return and fight back. And you wanted things to change.
So one day your hopeless gray life turned blue.
And now you were here, using your artistic abilities to portray Jinx as a kind of savior and leader of the revolution, as you were asked to do. Only instead of flag and shit you drew her with bombs and explosions. It was more like the image of Jinx you had.
“My eyes and nose are not like that.” Someone’s raspy voice reaches your ears.
You turn to face the intruder and see a girl sitting on the beam above few meters away. Somehow you just knew it was Jinx. You felt it in your gut, even though it was the first time you had encountered her.
You couldn't see her face completely hidden by the shadows, but you could see the color of her eyes. Pink, like shimmer.
“It’s the closest description I’ve got.” You say, too calm for a person who’ve met a Loose Cannon. And before you can stop yourself you add: “Maybe you could pose me so I could do it right?”
After that, there was silence between the two of you. Jinx didn't seem to expect such a reaction from you. You were surprised by your carelessness as well. She was dangerous and insane after all.
“Why not?” she says after a couple of seconds, probably agreeing out of boredom, and jumps off, landing smoothly like a cat.
As she comes over, you finally see her face. It does differ a little from what you were drawing. You also notice how short she is. She wasn't as intimidating as some people described. Although, perhaps, it was such thoughts that led many to their deaths.
You start correcting your painting, glancing at her from time to time, trying to convey her features as accurately as possible. You could lose yourself in art, even standing next to the most wanted criminal. Maybe you were crazy too?
“I'm not a hero you make me out to be, ya know?” Jinx suddenly comments after some time, looking at portrait of herself. Judging by the way she was tapping her feet, it took a lot of effort for her to stand still.
“I am aware.” You respond distantly too focused on your task, barely paying attention to anything around you. You almost finished.
“Then why?��� She asks tilting her head and observing you like a hawk.
You take a step back, glancing at the wall to check everything one last time. “Why not?” you repeat her own words from earlier.
Jinx huffs, hiding that she's confused by your answer again. You're not like the other Jinxers she's met before. You treated her almost indifferently, like an ordinary stranger. Not like symbol of Zaun, not like Loose Cannon, but just… Jinx.
“So whatcha gonna do for me for posing to ya?” she casually changes the subject.
“You didn't mention that I have to pay you.” You frown at her, inwardly cursing yourself for being so carefree for not asking earlier.
“Don’t sweat it, toots, I don’t need money.” She waves her hand dismissively and you are not sure if paying with something else is any better.
“Then what?”
“Hmm… let's see…” Jinx walks around you, wondering what to ask you. “You drew me… so it would be fair if I drew on you back, don't you think?”
“Draw me, you mean?”
“I didn’t stutter, toots.” She scoffs pulling crayon out of her pocket.
“Don’t move.” Jinx orders and grabs your wrist. Without asking your permission, she starts drawing something right on your arm.
You didn’t protest – out of your safety and curiosity. Her grip was firm but surprisingly gentle. You couldn't help but look at her tattoos until your gaze landed on her face. This close, you could see her freckles. The word “cute" flashed through your mind as you stared at her in fascination.
“Here!” She suddenly announces with a beaming smile, pulling you out of your little bubble. You look down at your arm and see little pink clouds painted from wrist to elbow.
“Don't wash it off until I meet you again.” Jinx says and walks away, disappearing into the shadows without explaining anything, leaving you wondering when you'll be able to meet her once more. But to some extent… you want it to happen.
And until then, you would try to keep the clouds on your body.
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namism · 2 days ago
Note
Oooo maybe a fluff/unspoken feelings piece w Kid??
i love | eustass kid
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➳ categories: modern au, female reader whose stepbrother is killer
➳ warnings: lots of swearing
➳ word count: 1.5k
➳ summary: Something about your relationship with Eustass Kid is unexplainable, but it's the type of unexplainable that you're comfortable with, no matter how odd it may seem.
➳ notes: i'm sorry if this is too niche, i had a vision tho 😭 most of his personality is based on these headcanons. thanks for the request! ❤️
➳ cross-posted on ao3
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"Shit. Bad date again?"
You can't see his face, but Kid has a shit-eating grin spread across his lips as he emerges from the driver's seat of his run-down pickup truck, a hand-me-down from your and Killer's uncle that Kid and his crew of metalheads use to drive to showcases in the city. He bangs the door closed, pockets his keys, then walks over to your seated ass on the curb.
"Shut up," you mutter. Kid sits beside you, and that's when you notice that he's holding a bottle of beer. He pops the cap open with his teeth, but you snatch it from his hands before he could take a sip. "You can't drink. It's late, and you're driving me home."
"It's just beer," he deadpans. Even then, he doesn't try to wrest the bottle from your hands, instead choosing to watch you take a depressive swig. He chuckles. "How was your shitty date?"
You glare.
"You asshole— how many times do I have to tell you that it wasn't a date? The beer tastes awful, by the way."
Kid is taken aback by your statement more than your aggressive manner of shoving the bottle toward his chest. The liquid sloshes around the bottle upon impact, and at that moment, the smell of bitter hops reaches his nose. He places it down on the asphalt and clasps his hands together.
"I got it from your brother. Blame him," he says. Your expression turns sour at the mention of Killer. "I would never risk a DUI while driving you home."
"Prince Charming," you tease. Kid is your stepbrother Killer's best friend, who you happen to be close with after many tag-alongs to gigs and shows in your city. Killer is convinced that you're closer to Kid than him with the frequency of your meet-ups and last-minute pick-up requests, and at the rate you're going, he's kind of right.
Kid sneers.
"Let's talk about your shitty date."
You roll your eyes.
"It wasn't a date."
"It looked like it to me. You don't wanna give the dude a chance? He sounded like a nice guy."
"Never in a million years. Anyone within a ten-mile radius from him would know that you're lying through your teeth right now." Pulling your knees to your chest, you gently lay your head on top of them. "I rejected him. He ran out of the diner as fast as he could. Thought everybody was pitying him because his ego couldn't take a rejection."
Kid smiles again, but this time wider. You went out with a guy tonight because you were too kind to reject his past advances, which more often than not attracted public attention when you didn't want them to. You tried to turn him down a couple of times before, but he couldn't get the hint. When he asked you out yesterday to dinner, you decided to reject him once and for all, with Kid and Killer's support.
Now that you've rejected the guy, Kid feels fucking fantastic. He hated him with his guts because he wouldn't leave you alone. Still, he loves to tease the fuck out of you, loves to play dumb and provoke you further, just to spark your enraged reactions because you look like a cute barking puppy.
Swirling his tongue in thought, Kid decides to pat your head with his big rough hand, ruffling your hair just a bit as he praises you.
"That's my girl. The next time he approaches you, try kicking his balls."
"Wouldn't that count as assault?"
"He harasses you, so what's the deal? Tomato, tomato; potato, potato. Defend yourself, please."
You laugh. "What the fuck?"
Grabbing the beer bottle, Kid rises from his seated position and offers you his hand. You stare at it, blankly.
"Come on, I'll take you somewhere you'll like."
You narrow your eyes at him.
"And where is that?"
"Answering would ruin the surprise. Just come with me, will ya?"
In the blink of an eye, you're Kid's passenger princess as he drives you to who-knows-where, an occurrence in your strange friendship that happens every so often when the both of you are left alone with a car full of gas. You roll down the window and make sure that no vehicle is passing by before sticking your hand out, feeling the wisps of cool air nip at your skin. When you move your head past the window, Kid hooks his fingers on your belt loops and pulls you back down.
"Fuck no, sit back down. No head-sticking, only your hands."
"But—"
"Your brother is gonna kill me if I bring you home headless. Hands. Only."
You stick your tongue out at him, but Kid only rolls his eyes. He lets you do whatever you want as long as you're not a second close to dying, often looking at you go wild in the passenger seat as he drives.
Minutes later, the truck slows down to a parking lot, a small rink built right in front of it.
You're the first to hop off, approaching the rink with blown irises as string lights scatter about to set a mood of warmth. It's not any other rink; it's a roller rink, perfect for rollerskating, perfect for two people to share a moment of intimacy.
"I'd much prefer iceskating, but this will do."
Kid holds up two skates in his hands, one of which seems to fit you nicely in a color you love.
You get on the rink as soon as you can, planting your feet on the ground as he hooks his fingers yet again on the loops of your belt. You sneer at him as he adds to your weight.
"Well, aren't you a big baby? Always leeching off me, never letting go," you say.
"Blah, blah, blah, it's a precautionary measure."
"You and precautionary measures don't go together."
Kid grabs you by the waist and turns you around, pushing you up against him. Your feet give up, but his hold on you is firm.
"Just like oil and water?"
You hit his chest.
"I hate you! Don't scare me like that!"
"That's what you get, brat." His lips morph into a grin while you hit him with weak punches. He laughs at your helplessness. "You get surprised by the simplest things. What I did right there was romantic for anyone but you."
"That was not romantic."
"What did I just say?"
"I hate you," you mutter. He laughs softly.
"Do me a favor and get yourself a guy who can treat you like that," he says. Your stomach turns, and your eyes fall to the ground. "You got a problem?"
"No, I don't."
You abruptly bump into him in an attempt to knock him over his feet, but he remains standing. At that moment, he traps you within his arms through a big embrace.
"So what's the hold up? Still stubborn?"
You punch his bicep as you squirm in the hug.
"You know why," you tell him.
"I do?"
"Ugh..."
You stop wriggling around. Kid feels something coming up.
You place your hands on his chest.
"You know why I don't want to date anyone else. You know."
"I know," he whispers. "So why can't you just say it out loud?"
"It's not that I can't say it— it's just..." You suck in a deep breath. "Is now the perfect time for it?"
"I don't know."
He guides your hands from his chest to his face, allowing you to cup his cheeks and touch them gently.
"But if you don't say it now, then when will you?"
A breathy laugh escapes your lips as you look at him. This isn't how you expected your day to turn out, but you aren't mad about it.
You like Kid.
You always have, and you know he likes you, too.
"I'll just show it to you."
You pull his face closer to yours and meet his lips. Kid leans further down to deepen your kiss, but he stays sweet and gentle, a complete 180 degrees from what people usually expect from him. The kiss is slow, like you've been meaning to do it for a long time and you don't want to rush the movement. Kid matches your pace perfectly, and he lasts longer than expected as he doesn't seem breathless when you pull away.
"Was that demonstration good enough?" you ask.
"No." He shakes his head. "I think I need another."
You hit his chest another time.
"Ouch, baby. You hurt my feelings."
As Kid feigns discomfort, you pull him close to your face again and peck his cheek.
"Do I have to say it?" you ask. "I love..."
He smiles.
"Nah, fuck that. Just show it to me. Took us long enough, honestly." He pinches your cheek. "I finally got you."
When he lets go of your waist, you race around the rink while he tries to catch you.
Something about your relationship with Eustass Kid is unexplainable, but it's the type of unexplainable that you're comfortable with, no matter how odd it may seem.
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thanosscross · 2 days ago
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Baby - Choi Seung- Hyun/ T.O.P x reader Part 4
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Summary: The next forty eight hours would be crazy for you, between going public with your relationship with Seung Hyun, to becoming a backup dancer for Bigbang out of the blue
Warnings: Details of the reader having a panic attack
Today was a big day for not only you and Seung Hyun, but for the rest of the band as well, you and your boyfriend were finally going public with your relationship, feeling as if you were stable enough after a full year together to let everybody know.
As you looked in the mirror one last time you took a deep breath, the next time you'd leave this house you wouldn't be known as the boys's new friend, you would be known as Seung Hyun's girlfriend, even if had been official for a year, you were still nervous about the millions of people who admired your boyfriend and how they'd feel. Opening the door you jumped yelping as you were met face to face with Dae-Sung "Are you okay, dear?" He asked softly resting a hand on your shoulder "Seung Hyun is with our boss..but he wanted someone to check on you" He explained, you offered him a smile trying to shake your nerves "I'm okay, just a little nervous" You whispered trying to shake the nerves out, literally, Dae-Sung giggled at your actions, before hugging you gently "it's okay, you're our girl, we're not going to let anybody say anything negative, especially Seung Hyun" He reassured, you nodded softly, returning the hug before looking at him "So..How do I do this?" You asked tilting his head, while you modeled occassionally, you had never done a whole announcement video before, but the boys swore that their video announcing their new tour dates would be an amazing time, that way you could go with them.
"Oh! It's gonna be so easy, dear! Just follow Seung Hyun's lead, we've got it all scripted out" He smiled, leading you to the living room excitedly "Baby" Seung Hyun's voice was like a warm hug to you as soon as he called you, you approached him quickly, hugging him as tightly as you could, it had been almost a week without him while they filmed music videos, and that was hell enough for you. "Ready?" He smiled placing his hands on your hips, you nodded, before tilting your head "I still don't know what I'm doing" You giggled, hoping he'd give you some direction, but instead he just chuckled "Just look pretty for me, baby" He whispered to you as their manager held the phone starting to record "Hello! It's BigBang! We're so excited to share with you that we'll be going on tour again!" Dae-Sung cheered, Ji-yong noticed his cue furrowing his eyebrows "Top! Get over here we're recording our tour video!" He shouted before their manager turned the camera towards the both of you, you sqeaked in shock as Seung Hyun held the back of your neck, pressing his lips against yours deeply causing your cheeks to heat up rather quickly, the camera turning back to the boys quickly as they stared in 'shock' "Y/n!" They shouted before their manager gave the go-ahead that they were done recording, Seung Hyun slowly pulled away, looking you in the eyes before smiling, your face was hot with a blush that you attempted to hide with your hands.
Nobody was expecting the video to blow up as much as it did, the more surprising part was you were getting more love than hate, most of the reactions you had were about how adorable it was how flustered you got with your boyfriend, or your height difference, or the face Top was gently with grabbing you, but not so gentle with his kiss. As you sat in the airport you scrolled through you phone watching the boys and their management team talk, not wanting to be nosey you looked down to your phone again, not noticing the four boys slowly making their way to you "Y/n" "Dear" "Darling" "Baby" You heard back to back, you sighed looking up at them, unable to hide your smile "Yes?" You asked giggling, starting to feel the effects of your medication take over, it wasn't that you were high, but the longer you fought off the sleep the pills induced, the more you'd feel high, aw, the joys that come with the fear of flying while dating a K-pop idol. "One of our back-up dancers isn't going to make her flight..and since you've already been our back up dancer before for videos...we were thinkingggg" They started before all of them started to talking together "I don't care" You shrugged, not realizing in the moment you'd be on stage, in front of hundreds of thousands of the people, the boys cheered loudly before being hushed by Seung Hyun "Shhhh, public place" He reminded, helping you out of your seat to start heading towards the plane.
You slept the entire plane ride, even needing Seung Hyun's help waking off of the plane due to not being fully awake, whenever you did finally wake up, you were standing against Seung Hyun's side, his arm wrapped around you as they waited for their bags to come around the baggage claim. As everybody grabbed their bags you took notice to everybody thanking you again, why were they thanking you so much? All you did was take an amazing nap? Getting to the hotel you slowly started to realize something was agreed upon at some point seeing two different sets of costumes in your room closet. "My love?" You called out, seeing your boyfriend emerge from the connecting room "Babyy" He smiled "Are you ready for tonight?" He asked grabbing your hands gently "About that...What am I doing?" You asked before pulling your medication out of your purse waving it at him "I can't remember" You offered, he looked at you almost like he was going to get in trouble as the words now echoed in Seung Hyun's brain 'Baby, I have to take these so don't ask me to do anything, or ask me anything important'
"So..I might've forgot...and We asked you if you'd be our back up dancer, because one of ours missed her flight" He shyly recalled, you groaned letting your hand fall against his chest "Do you know how many people will see if I ruin something!?" You shouted, starting to pace, you heart hammering in your chest, you breathing started to become erratic as you tried to wrap your arms around yourself as a self-soothe tactic. "Baby, you haven't ruined anything ever" He stated trying to grasp ahold of you, but you stepped out of reach last minute "Seung Hyun! This is your guys's career!" You shouted, not noticing the three other boys slowly making their way into the room hearing your panicked shouts, you were trying to hold back sobs as you also tried to catch your breath pacing. "I-I don't even look like your back up dancers!" You added on, wiping the tears that were sitting on the curve of your top lip "I can't do that, Seung Hyun!" You gasped a bit as you slammed into his body, now suddenly standing right in your path, Seung Hyun grabbed your face, not rough enough to hurt you, but not exactly gentle either. "Y/n. You're spiraling, take a moment" He demanded, his tone stern, you took a few shaky inhales before grabbing onto his wrist tightly, desperate to get an actual breath of air rather than what you've been doing. "Keep going, you're okay" He added on, his tone still stern, but the volume of his voice was a lot softer. You hiccupped sightly finally taking a deep breath, feeling the familiar light headed fuzzy feeling throughout your body.
Seung Hyun kept ahold of your face, repositioning it to look at him "I won't force you..but I will say, You haven't and won't ruin anything, and the fact you're so quick to insult the woman I love is starting to irritate me" He said, his tone becoming harsher, you nodded slightly feeling his touch become a little more gentle than before "I just...you guys have an image with everything..and...I don't want to mess that up" You muttered, Seung Hyun sighed "Our image is just that, ours, we do what we want with it, with management approval, we want you" He stated, You nodded before hugging him tightly "Promise you'll help?" You asked, only now noticing he had started to get ready "We all promise to help" He agreed motioning to the separating door, the boys leaving the minute Seung Hyun grabbed you, not wanting to see you two fuck if you did.
The start of the show was smooth, you were remembering everything that was shoved at you in such a short amount of time, until their song Bae Bae. Halfway through you noticed you had completely forgot, you knew you couldn't run off stage, almost as soon as you realized, so did your boyfriend, making his way over before grabbing your hand pulling you forward slightly, to stand in front of him. He kept moving to the music, slowly moving your hand to rest on his neck before raising his arms up bouncing to the beat. Seung Hyun kept close to you, making sure if he was rapping his verse and had to leave your side he held your hand before handing you over to one of the other boys.
The rest of the show you kept losing yourself in thought, going on auto pilot basically as you danced, not really realizing the show was over until you were back in the dressing room "Listen Y/n the fans loved you! And I swear! Your body language with everybody was hot! You have to preform with us more!" The boys cheered following behind you, you turned around raising your eyebrows towards them "Hey! She's still my girl even if she had to dance with you" Seung Hyun reminded pulling you close "We have a small interview after this, do you want to start a shower for us?" He asked softly, pressing his lips against yours for a moment before changing into something more comfortable.
You did choose to stay back, letting the boys do their thing a few rooms away, the boys laughed as the interviewer started her next question "So! Top, Fans have seen your spicy video of you showing you're a taken man now, tell us, how did you come into contact with Model Y/n l/n?" He asked, Seung Hyun blushed brightly, Dae-sung proudly standing up "I've got this!! I'll be y/n!" He cheered before starting to spin making his way over to Seung Hyun, falling into his arm, Seung Hyun a mixture of blushing and giggles, catching his friend quickly, not wanting him to fall. "ooo You're hot!" He cheered in a high pitched voice, Seung Hyun laughed loudly shaking his head "That is not! What happened! You be me! I'll be Y/n! I'm around her the most" Seung Hyun protested, Dae-sung just laughed agreeing, the other boys laughing louder as Seung Hyun smiled giving Dae-Sung a flirty look through his eyelashes "Hi baby, I'm t.o.p" Dae-sung said, trying to mock his friend's voice, failing miserably "I'm y/n..sorry my friends are crazy and pushed me over" Seung Hyun explained, twirling his hair in his finger before laughing "and that's basically it" Ji-Yong smiled, knowing the two would continue joking if he didn't stop them, which is exactly what they did until you walked out, Seung Hyun shaking his chest gently against Dae-sung's arm laughing before making eye contact with you behind the camera. You covered your mouth, desperate not to make a sound, but you couldn't help it, seeing your boyfriend act so feminine was adorable and funny.
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thekoalapastriesbakery · 12 hours ago
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BUZZED!
formula one x male!reader
request: Okay okay, here me out, Male!reader gets a buzzcut and the drivers find out via like instagram or something and they get really whiny abt it.
summary: you get a buzz cut without telling your boyfriend
warnings: initial instagram post is just for reference + reader only posts whichever one applies to you most!, swearing, playful arguing
contains: alex albon, lance stroll, + lewis hamilton
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youruser has added to their story!
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written: time for a change ✂️
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alex albon:
"WHAT DID YOU DOOOOOOOO?" alex yelped as soon as he walked through the door of your shared apartment.
you had just been lounging on the sofa, scrolling through social media to pass the time. you jumped slightly at your boyfriend's shouting. "what? what did i do?"
alex rounded the corner into the living room and pointed at your hair with a pout.
"that! what did you?!"
"alex, i just cut my hair." you chuckled, staying slumped on the sofa.
alex whined. "how could you do this to me???"
"you're so dramatic, oh my fucking god." you rolled your eyes lightheartedly. as much as you loved your boyfriend, he sure knew how to be dramatic. "it's not that bad?"
"yes it is!" alex insisted. "what am i supposed to do now when i want your attention?!"
"ask for it like a normal person?"
"it's like you don't even know me." alex huffed, flopping down on the sofa beside you.
you laughed quietly and put your phone away. "it will grow back, y'know?"
your boyfriend tilted his head to look at you with a a pout. "and what am i supposed to do until then?"
"cope?"
he whined again and poked you in the ribs, making you squirm slightly. "you're so mean."
"yeah, well, it's not getting reattached," you argued. alex ran his hand over the shaved hair with a sigh. "better get used to it, baby."
"fine ... but never again, okay?"
"no promises."
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lance stroll:
the second you walked into your boyfriend's hotel room, he was right in front of you. lance crossed his arms and pouted at you.
"uh-oh," you murmured.
a sheepish smile crossed your lips. you tentatively stepped forward until you were close enough to pull lance into a hug, which you were very pleased to say he didn't reject. hopefully that meant he wasn't too upset.
"why did you have to get a buzz cut?" lance whined, pushing your shoulder.
you hummed. the truth of it was that the haircut had been an impulsive action rather than a conscious decision, but ... well, it was done now. "it's just hair, baby."
"no, it's not," lance argued with a pout. "it's your hair. which you let me play with and wash and put bows in and stuff."
"yeah, i hope you understand i would literally never let anybody else touch my hair as much as you do," you pointed out. was a part of you hoping to distract lance with a sweet statement? perhaps. but he didn't need to know that.
lance paused for a moment. he seemed torn between being sad and whiny about your hair, and being happy about what you said. sue him. he liked to feel special. "... then why did you cut it?"
"because i wanted to?" you shrugged. your hands dropped to lance's waist and tugged him closer, making him squeak quietly. "it's summer and it's hot and i don't need a fur coat on my head?"
"but what about the bows?" lance pouted at you.
a little grin tugged at your lips. "well, i can put them in your hair?"
your boyfriend seemed to short circuit at the idea of you putting bows in his hair. his lips parted in surprise, before his expression morphed into a goofy grin. "okay."
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lewis hamilton:
the first reaction you got from lewis about your haircut was a text. he must've already been close to home, but apparently he felt the need to freak out about you getting a buzz cut as early as possible.
you cut your hair?
... yes?
it hadn't taken you long to reply. a minute at most. evidently, that was long enough for your boyfriend to get to your door. he flung it open, a dramatic frown on his face. "why?"
"hello to you too," you muttered, standing up to greet your boyfriend with a kiss. "because it was getting in my eyes, lew."
"so?" lewis raised an eyebrow at you.
you scoffed playfully, thinking he was just having a joke and not being serious. "so i couldn't see."
"so?" lewis repeated.
not joking, apparently.
"i can see?" he poked at the now-short strands with a wary expression. "i'd lead you places??"
"lewis."
your boyfriend pouted. he let out a dramatic sigh and turned away from you. "fine, i guess you like your vision more than you love me, then."
knowing he was just milking it, you wrapped your arms around lewis from behind and kissed his temple cheekily. "yes! glad you understand."
"... brat."
"love you too, lew."
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©thekoalapastriesbakery :: please do not copy or rewrite my work on any platform !!
author's note: anon i am SO hearing you out (can you guys tell i love whiny boys yet)
comments + reblogs appreciated!
taglist: @raizelchrysanderoctavius @crispysoup318 @op-81-lvr-reblogs @ncrsbrg @spoonfulofmilo @justaf1girl @widow-cevans
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charmed-asylum · 13 hours ago
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The award for god damn my mouth drop like a cartoon cat goes to SY but u know . I know he doesn’t beat around the bush. However, was I thinking he be like this . And shit I can say from experience and studies that a lot he doing goes right with it. I mean sad thing and it’s really not just one person to pin point who could of fix this besides Thor town folks and trailer trash mom ( now idk where she grew up but hey it’s not me but cliches) that could of help. It’s sad because for her case she probably isn’t a slut while Sy is crazy he just type that knows it but tries to be all wooo man I mean I’m not crazy I’m caring but if u ever mess with me then haha u be getting a dead cat in your mail box or a stalker for life but wooooooo I’m just caring and being a human . Shit pat on the back and you good is looking out a simple box of stuff is looking out non stop poof Sy there is not helping out it’s stalking but bc this town is so small folks won’t see it. Oh he lucky that town size of a city block.
“On pay day, you go down to cash your check then give most of it right back, parsing it out for your various expenses. At the end of it, you have even less than the month before. You don't get it. Thing's only seem to get worse; not just money, but your body” honey this statement so spot on huh one a check back in the day like your time period AU money u get paid can last a month or last time now it’s like a blink poof gone and your body lord I’m only in my 20s and the issues I’m having at my age blown minds.
Sy just always there and idk why but it’s big ( lord I’m drooling and have not finish this thought) well as a whole get always with the sneak attack shit I’m barley 5 foot and I still have issues . Bc I’m too short they turn around and still don’t see me I gotta jump be like Boo. Anyway still damn “. For a big man, he sure can sneak up on you. “ also going back to my girl you got yourself a lifetime 20/20 level stalker. Hahaha way you keep doing Thor I can’t “ It isn't his fault he reminds you of that spoiled deadbeat. “ I wonder still wonder because he hasn’t been front with her which I feel it coming feel it coming . ( still gonna be shock) but on the why he gave her a reason which I’m gonna point out in a second but can “ I don't like to carry 'round debts. Let me buy you one." be one I mean it be least crazy one . And if not does he pray on pregnant women because of well a lot tumblr taught me a lot about kinks but because how easy the target she or how her emotions not there or pregnancy brain. “ You really don't get this man. You're no longer so sure that Thor sent him to check up on you, not since your last interaction. In fact, the wingman seemed more spiteful of him than you” also that he was so close to Thor which questioned his character like so he mad bc what Thor did or he use Thor for some reason. Because in small time I can’t see some friends falling out so easy bc hello who else u got .
This again makes me feel bad for her because while Sy seems nice and it your name was the fluff you don’t ask for I be all aww so cute and romantic but no nothing ever good and sweet it’s an huh my leg said in a sponge bob character voice. Like never so simple and sweet but damn how bad I felt reading this “ You glance over and find Sy watching you as he stands in the queue. His gaze makes you want to wilt.. Not even Thor looked at you like that. Don't be silly. Sy is just being a dutiful guy, helping out the town slut in her time of need. You won't be duped. Not when you can hear your name being twisted on tongues at that very moment” and fact he open ( after 1st day seeing her) mention he read books about pregnancy. It makes her wall slowly start to crack. “ He suggested before he's been reading things about pregnancy. You just can't picture him with a copy of What To Expect When You're Expecting.”
HAAH I’m sure many mention this but lord can you imagine “ He returns with a black coffee and a rather colourful donut. They don't match. Bitter and sweet all at once. “ But no the way that he watches her even down to her fingers. Or what way her EYES 👀 may go. He’s watching her as if I only watching tho his pray but as if he I don’t know still in war zone, looking through his sniper or goggles, watching his enemy. But still huh I hate it the perfect crazy stalker but idk even talking to her not at her or down to her .
AND HE SO HONESTLY BLUNT like okay he playing a game of 1s and 00s and we doing tic tac toe. Still like , “ "Yes, I'd like to take care of you. And the little one, if you'll let me….. His eyes flick up to the ceiling and his cheek ticks as he gives the question genuine thought. When he looks at you again, his face is set, "because I want to." that to me feels ( because not 1st time) he thinking on how to say it like before with the honest but down play it. In away which is why I feel there more.
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Called to Duty 4
Warnings: non/dubcon, pregnancy, abandonment, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Characters: Captain Syverson
Summary: You struggle to move on from the biggest mistake of your life but find it hard to forget among the whispers of a small town.
Part of the Backwoods AU
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.
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The bank is as ever anxiety inducing. On pay day, you go down to cash your check then give most of it right back, parsing it out for your various expenses. At the end of it, you have even less than the month before. You don't get it. Thing's only seem to get worse; not just money, but your body. Every day you wake up, you feel even more crummy than the last. 
Your hopes of a treat at the cafe are dashed. You give a longing look as you walk by and peer through the window. You can smell cinnamon and coffee. You're strict non-caffeinated, doctor's orders, but a decaf would be amazing with one of those cinnamon buns. Ugh, damn, why are you torturing yourself? 
You turn to continue down the street but barely dodge out of the way of another pedestrian. He makes sure you can't pass as he mirrors you, sidestepping to block your way. You sigh as you step back and look Sy in the face. For a big man, he sure can sneak up on you. 
"Hey," he flips up his dark sunglasses, "how're you feeling?" 
You stare up at him defiantly, not quite bold enough to glare. He hasn't done anything wrong, he's just persistent. It isn't his fault he reminds you of that spoiled deadbeat. Or that your emotions are volatile, one moment teary eyed, the next blazing hot with rage. 
"Fine, thanks for asking," you shrug, "Sy, I gotta--" 
"I owe you a cookie," he points to the cafe window at his shoulder. 
You blink. You remember the cracked shortbread. You forgot about that. The mention of the sugary treat makes your stomach growl and your mouth water. 
"No, you don't--" 
"I do," he insists, "I don't like to carry 'round debts. Let me buy you one." 
"I got it free," you say, "it's not a big deal." 
"It is to me," he counters, "I was heading in anyway." 
You stare at him. You really don't get this man. You're no longer so sure that Thor sent him to check up on you, not since your last interaction. In fact, the wingman seemed more spiteful of him than you. You look across the steeet to the pharmacy then back at him. The aromas wafting out with each swing of the door have you ravenous.  
"I can't stay long, I gotta work," you say. 
His cheeks twitch, as if he tamps back a smile before it can bloom, "after you." 
He gesture behind you to the door. You turn and lead the way. He reaches past you to open the door before you can and you enter ahead of him. The din within is lively and the air is warm from the crowd and the employees steaming out orders behind the counter. 
"Wanna find a seat?" He suggests, "you should rest." 
You open your mouth to argue but think better of it. You'd rather not stand in the clustered line. You nod and head off to claim the table by the window. There isn't much left. 
You pull out the chair and brace your back as you sit with a sigh. You glance over and find Sy watching you as he stands in the queue. His gaze makes you want to wilt, instead you turn your attention out the window. 
Not even Thor looked at you like that. Don't be silly. Sy is just being a dutiful guy, helping out the town slut in her time of need. You won't be duped. Not when you can hear your name being twisted on tongues at that very moment. 
You sit and wait, wring the strap of your small purse. You watch the street. If it wasn't for the people, Hammer Ford would be serene. 
A plate clinks in front of you and a porcelain mug as well. It isn't a cookie and you can smell the herbal tea's rosy flavour. You peer up at Sy as he gives an apologetic look. 
"Cookies are still baking so I got you a cinnamon bun," he says. 
"And tea?" You add. 
"Can't have one without the other," he says, "no coffee for you." 
"Yeah, I... I know." 
You could laugh. He suggested before he's been reading things about pregnancy. You just can't picture him with a copy of What To Expect When You're Expecting.  
"Thank you," you smile as best you can. 
"Gotta get mine, be back," he excuses himself and marches back to the counter. 
You look down at the gooey iced draped spiral. You really shouldn't. Not only accept his misspent generosity but indulge in the excess sugar. Yet your hormones won't let you resist. You can at least wait until he's sitting down. 
He returns with a black coffee and a rather colourful donut. They don't match. Bitter and sweet all at once. He sits and takes off his hat and sunglasses. 
You put your purse to the edge of the table and rest your hand on your stomach, doing your best to resist the animalistic need to tear apart the dessert. His eyes follow the movement and you quickly drop your arm. You don't even think when you do it, it's just a habit. 
"You-" he begins. 
"Wh--" you find your voice at the same time. 
You both stop, hesitant. He nods and gestures to you, lifting his cup as he watches you intently. That's new too. Thor never listened much, only talked a lot. Besides, you weren't exactly together for the conversation. 
"Sy," you clear your throat and sit forward as much as you can, "why are you following me around?" 
His brows form a vee, "I'm... it's not... I'm tryna help." 
"Okay, but why?" 
His eyes flick up to the ceiling and his cheek ticks as he gives the question genuine thought. When he looks at you again, his face is set, "because I want to." 
"You want to?" 
"Yes, I'd like to take care of you. And the little one, if you'll let me." 
You can't help your snort, "we hardly know each other." 
"Isn't for lack of trying," he taps his fingers on his mug. "Aren't ya gonna try the bun?" 
"I will," you assure him. He's trying to distract you and it's close to working. The cinnamon is driving you mad. "A baby is a lot of work and... I'm not your responsibility. I know Thor is your friend." 
"Was," he interjects.  
"Sure," you accept his decisive declaration, "but that doesn't mean you have to worry about his mistakes." 
"Mistakes? I don't think so," he says. 
"Well, it's not exactly planned," you scoff, "Sy, really I don't feel right about you doing so much." 
"Wouldn't feel right not doing it," he shrugs his burly shoulders. 
“But why?” You nearly exclaim. You just want to know why he cares so much, about you? 
He leans forward, elbows on the table, “they talk about me too, ya know? Since I got back from... serving. They say I’m f—crazy, or whatever. It wasn’t easy or nothin’ over there but I’m not nuts. Not like they say. Just like you’re not some slut, forgive me for saying it out loud.” 
You look down at the table and exhale. So he hears as much as anyone else about you. At least he’s honest. At least he isn’t joining them. You purse your lips and reach for the cinnamon bun, unable to restrain yourself any longer. 
“For what it’s worth,” you raise your eyes to meet his, “I never thought you were... unwell, or whatever they say.” 
His cheeks pinch, another suppressed smile, and he tilts his head, “I’m only happy to hear you think of me.” 
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starfruitii · 1 day ago
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cws & notes. reader is kind of insecure. akaashi keiji x gn!reader. established relationship. slight angst. 600+ words. idk where this came from but enjoy?
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“Do you think you’ll get sick of me, one day?”
You regret the words as soon as they leave your lips. In your head, it sounded like a perfectly sound question, but with the way Keiji is looking at you, it’s clear he doesn’t agree. 
“I beg your pardon, dear?” His voice is painfully soft, brows furrowing in concern as he places his book down on the coffee table. Under his gentle gaze, you feel stripped bare, exposed in all your insecurity. You should have swallowed the question down, as sharp as it felt in your throat, anything to avoid the way he’s staring at you now.
“Nevermind,” You say quickly, snatching the TV remote from the table, and busying yourself with choosing a show. The screen flicks between channels, flashing brightly coloured lights across your faces. “That was a dumb question. I’m sorry, just forget it.”
“My love,” Keiji reached out a hand, lightly brushing the side of your face. With a gentle, but firm grip, he grasped your chin and tilted your head to the side to face him. “[Name]. Why are you asking me that?” 
“No reason. Don’t worry about it.” You try to laugh it off, but you can only choke out a quiet sob. Somehow, somewhere between asking the question and now, your eyes started burning, glazing over with unshed tears.
Damn. He’s looking even more concerned now. Why couldn’t you have just kept it to yourself, tucking those doubts far into the dusty corners of your head, where his ears would never reach them?
“Hey,” Keiji brushed his thumb under your eyes, wiping away a stray tear that falls. “You’re getting me worried now. Are you okay? What happened?”
There was a long pause, and something inside you cracks. You let out a sniffle, then a gasp, then the last piece of your self-control breaks, in a mess of tears and snot. Keiji’s face crumples, and he tugs you forward into his chest, rubbing your back soothingly as you continue to cry. 
“Did I do something?” He presses. “Am I not treating you the way you want to be treated? I’m sorry if I’ve hurt you, but please tell me what I did–”
“No!” You quickly say, regaining your composure slightly. He’s never done anything, never hurt you, intentionally, or unintentionally, never said the wrong words, never made you feel unloved. That was the problem. Because nothing gold shines forever, and every good thing comes to an end. You were just waiting for the end, the moment he decides he is done with your self-consciousness, your bad habits, your looks. 
There is always a reason for someone to leave; you’ve learnt that the hard way. 
“I-I don’t know,” You mumble, tracing your nail against the couch. “I just–I guess, most people do. Get sick of me, that is. And I d-don’t wanna lose you too.”
Keiji was silent for a moment, and for a moment you worry that you've ruined things. The thought lingers in your mind for only a second, because a second later there are half-a-dozen kisses being pressed to the top of your head.
“I love you,” Keiji whispers between each peck. “I love you, so, so much. I love you, and I love you, and I will say it as many times as it takes you to believe it.”
The feeling of his breath tickles your skin, making you laugh weakly.
“I'm never going to get sick of you,” He continues. “I adore you, and every part of you. No matter what happens, I'm never leaving. Okay?”
“Okay,” you whisper back.
Keiji kisses your cheek. “Good. Now, why don't you put on a movie for us to watch?”
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remedyturtles · 1 day ago
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for the writing ask meme: disaster twins bc i am nothing if not predictable aaaaand ur pick of 8, 22, 29 or 42 if u would like :3
thank you my dearest russothy @rbtlvr for the prompt! this got away from me and also went in so many different directions lmao... snugs hope you like it :D
wordcount 2.7k, pre-series
22. "...you knew?"  29. "Tell me the truth."
"I've definitely got a unicorn horn." Leo said, holding up the puzzle piece. 
"Which one?" Donnie propped up the box lid. 
The two inspected, comparing the angle with the reference, covered in a multitude of unicorns.
"Hard to tell." Leo set the piece aside, with his other collection of possible key points. They'd only just finished the border, spread out the bedroom floor. They were twelve years old. They were both grounded. They were absolutely and intolerably bored. 
No TV. No phones. No lab time for Donnie, no skateboarding time for Leo. No amount of pleading with Raph or Mikey to smuggle them entertainment worked because they weren't happy either.
So it was the unicorn puzzle. And any other way they could pass the time. 
"It's your turn." Donnie said, flipping over a few middle pieces and sorting them into piles by colour. 
"Sure. Truth or dare." Leo plucked another horn-like piece with a pleased noise and tried to slot it with his first. It didn't fit. 
"Truth." Donnie said, after a moment.
"Wimp."
"I stand by my answer."
"Fine." Leo sighed, annoyed. "You're no fun. What is the last thing you looked up on the internet?"
"Pssh. Something absolutely genius, I'm sure." Donnie said. "But alas, we will never know, as I do not have my phone on me." 
"Hogwash." Leo said, mimicking his voice, "As if your eidetic memory doesn't know. I'm insulted on your own behalf that you would insinuate such a thing."
Donnie mentally ran back through his most recent searches and struggled not to cringe. A victorious smile spread over Leo's face, before he'd even said a word. 
"How'd you know it was going to be something stupid?" Donnie complained, ducking his head to pretend to sort his pieces more intently. 
Leo tapped his lip, milking his success. "Come on. You've got a thousand bookmarks on your computer for all your nerd stuff and overflowing shelves of paper books and manuals. If you need to Google something, then it's the bottom of the barrel questions." 
Donnie mumbled under his breath.
"What's that?" Leo leaned forward over the puzzle, grin growing to shit-eating.
"You heard me." Donnie's face flushed. 
"I'm not sure I did, because I'm pretty sure my genius prodigy Donatello knows exactly how many millimetres are in a centimetre." 
"I was just making sure!" Donnie complained loudly, snapping a hand out to push at Leo's face and shove him back to his side of the puzzle. "It's my turn now, shut up. Truth or dare?"
"Dare." Leo answered, because he always said dare. 
"Shocker." Donnie deadpanned. "Fine. Eat a puzzle piece."
"Okay." Leo picked up the unicorn horn. Before Donnie could stop him, he placed the piece on his tongue, swallowed, and showed a decidedly empty mouth.
"Oh my stars, Leon, I didn't think you'd actually do it." Donnie said, stunned with the heights of his idiocy. 
"You dared me." Leo shrugged. "What did you expect?"
"We needed that!" 
"You cannot pretend this is my fault. You literally just told me to eat it." 
"I hate you. Alright, Curious George, it's your turn." 
Leo barked a laugh. He rearranged his collection of unicorn horn pieces, forever missing one now, and said, "Truth or dare?"
"Dare." Donnie wasn't a wimp. 
"Bet." Leo hopped up and immediately began digging in a drawer. "Close your eyes. Don't open them until I say so."
Instant regret. So much instant regret. Donnie didn't obey, tense all over, watching Leo with wariness. 
Leo found whatever he was looking for, keeping it behind his back when he turned around, and said, challenging, "Are you switching?"
If Donnie switched to truth, Leo would ask something really awful, and he'd have no choice but to answer as penalty. So Donnie scoffed, like that was a ridiculous question, and shut his eyes. 
Leo’s footsteps got closer and he sat in front of Donnie. He said, calm and mischievous, “I’m going to touch your face.”
With the warning, he didn’t flinch when Leo carefully removed his mask, placing it in Donnie’s hand. Then there was the sound of an uncapped pen, and a whiff of marker. 
“Hold still.” Leo said, fingers bracing Donnie’s head and setting the marker tip to his face, waiting a moment for him to adjust, then began to draw.
“Urgh.” Donnie said, holding still beyond his fingers fidgeting in his lap with the mask, eyes closed but recognizing the movement of the pen in two arcs over either eye. 
“There.” Leo said, removing the pen. “We match.”
Donnie opened his eyes to see Leo directly in front of him, something warm and fond before it eased back into gremlin mischief. “Feel beautiful?”
Donnie got up and looked at himself in the mirror. Dark red marker stripes were drawn carefully over his eyes, matching at the face grinning behind him. 
He rolled his eyes. He stomped over to the same drawer and said, “Truth or dare?”
“Dare.” Leo said, already taking off his mask. 
Donnie found the black marker. “Close your eyes.”
Obediently, Leo shut his eyes, grinning too hard that it caused his forehead to wrinkle while Donnie moved his head around to get the perfect sharp and thick eyebrows. He put genuine effort into making them look good, because Leo had too. 
“Done.” Donnie said, releasing his hostage of Leo’s head.
Leo leapt up to the mirror and gave a wolf whistle. “Damn! That’s not bad.”
“I didn’t come here to fuck around.” Donnie replied. Looking at both of them in the mirror he wished he had his phone so he could get a picture. He flashed a peace sign anyway, like they were taking a selfie, and Leo automatically mimicked it. For a moment, he forgot the situation and grinned back at his twin through the mirror. 
Then he remembered why they were stuck in a room doing puzzles and dropped the peace sign, shuffling down to sort through the stacks. Leo watched him, the small frown made quite more serious by his impressive brows, then hopped over the half assembled puzzle to his side. “My turn?”
It was an invitation to stop, if Donnie wasn’t feeling it anymore. But it wasn’t like they had anything better to do. “Truth.”
"Do you regret it?" 
Donnie glared at him. 
Leo stared back at him, completely serious. 
"I'm switching. Dare." Donnie said. Whatever horrible thing Leo could concoct would be better than answering that. Even if it meant he had to do it, no matter what. 
"Fine." Leo shrugged. "I dare you to tell me the truth."
"That's cheating." Donnie lifted his lip in a sneer.
"Is it?" Leo challenged. There wasn't a specific rule against it. 
Donnie didn't answer him, turning to try and poke his various pieces together. Neither of them spoke for a while. The tense atmosphere reigned. 
"I regret that I got caught." Donnie said, eventually. "Which probably isn't what I'm supposed to feel." 
"So you'd do it again, if you felt you couldn't get caught?" Leo prompted, knuckles white in his lap. 
"Only one question. Your turn. Truth or dare." 
"Dare."
"I dare you to answer a truth." Donnie said, sharp. 
Leo's eyes narrowed. He couldn't claim it was cheating without being a hypocrite and he knew it. He rolled out a slow, "Fine. Ask."
"Why'd you take the fall with me?" Donnie was been dying to ask. Leo hadn't even known what Donnie was up to, and yet he stood in front of Dad and swore he'd been helping. 
Leo said, "Pssh, I thought you were gonna ask something hard. So you weren't grounded alone, obviously. And it'd be so boring if I couldn't hang out with you anyway. And so I could bug you about what the hell you were thinking. So. Truth or dare?"
Donnie would eat every piece of this puzzle if he didn't have to answer another truth. "Dare." 
"Wimp." Leo said, shark-grin. 
"Your standards for cowardice seem to change from moment to moment." Donnie said, mouth dry. 
Leo could easily pull the same move and insist he answer a truth, but with the tit-for-tat complete, to abuse the power would break the game. "It's fine. This one'll be real easy," his gaze hardened, "especially since it's what you should've been doing all along. I dare you to take me with you next time."
Donnie exhaled slowly through his nose, swallowing. He avoided Leo's eye, pretending he was super interested in placing his puzzle pieces. "Fine." 
"Promise?"
"Yeah, whatever."
He could feel Leo staring at the top of his head. He irritatedly poked a piece in place, the leg of a unicorn, and asked, "Truth or dare?"
"I'll do truth if you do." Leo bargained. 
A rare offer. Despite his annoyance, he couldn't help but take the bait. "Deal."
"Perfect. Hit me." 
Donnie could tell Leo was already formulating his next question. Unfortunately for him, Donnie got to ask first. "Tell me something you've never told anyone."
Leo grimaced. He didn’t answer for a long minute, eyes visibly ticking back and forth as he thought.  Then laughed, a little nervous, and said, "Alright. Okay." 
The nerves were interesting. Donnie poked, almost fascinated, "Scared?"
"No, I just –" Leo bit his lip and glanced up, fidgeting with a bunch of sky pieces. He was definitely nervous, breath quickening. "I've wanted to say, actually. So this seems as good a moment as any."
Oh, this was actually serious. Weird. Made weirder by the drawn-on brows. Donnie waited for more information before assuming anything. Leo delayed longer, killing time, and only to falter at Donnie's expression. 
"It's uh, not a big deal, but. I figured I should … tell you. That. I'm gay." Leo held his breath at the end of the sentence.
"Right." Donnie nodded. 
Leo blinked at him like an owl. "... you knew?"
"I… figured." Donnie evaluated the situation and determined a different reaction was needed, judging by the clear anxiety of Leo's face. This hadn't been what Donnie was expecting, because why would Leo be nervous about his reaction. "I did not consider it worth a second thought. You are my twin. There is nothing about you that I wouldn't accept without question."
"Oh. Okay." Leo inhaled shakily then let it out slowly. "Cool. That's cool. Don't tell anyone else yet, okay?"
"Like you even have to ask." Donnie scoffed. There was a code about these sorts of things, after all, twelve years in the making. He wasn't about to break their sacred bond now. "Do you need a hug?"
Leo crawled directly over the puzzle to climb into Donnie's arms. He squeezed so hard it squashed the air out of his lungs. He mumbled in Donnie's ear, "Thanks."
"I love you. If anyone has a problem with it, send them directly to me." Donnie's grip tightened to the point of Leo letting out an 'oof' too. 
"Love you too." Leo gave another squish then pulled back, a puzzle piece stuck to his bare leg. "Your turn."
"Now?" Donnie complained. "After we just had a moment?"
"And we're about to have another moment, bucko." Leo was close enough to poke Donnie directly in the plastron, pretending to be stern even as he was still a little shaky. "Your turn."
"Truth." Donnie sighed, fulfilling his end of the bargain. 
"Why'd you do it?" Leo asked, immediate. All young indignation, eyes shining with left-behind hurt, and a more incandescent worry that was mirrored in all the annoyed glares outside their door. 
“Scoff.” Donnie avoided his eye. “Surely you do not need to hold me at metaphorical gunpoint to ask that question when you already know the answer. I wanted uranium.”
"That's not why you did it." Leo said, expression all the more severe by the painted brows. He insistently poked Donnie in the middle of his plastron again. "I know you didn't want uranium just to have. There's always a purpose, a plan. Why?" 
"Multiple uses." Donnie said, tightly, through clenched teeth. "It doesn't matter. No one wants me to have it because they think I'll give myself radiation poisoning. Because it'll put me on a watch list. Because when I tried to sneak out and meet up with a seller I got caught. So it doesn't matter, because obviously no one here is going to let me."
"You're right about that, because you will give yourself radiation poisoning and sneaking off when you're a twelve-year-old mutant to meet up with some sketchy seller was a terrible idea. That's still not what I'm asking. Why?" Leo said, because despite pretending for everyone else that he was in on it the whole time, he was actually just as opposed as the rest of them at his failed scheme.
Donnie physically pushed Leo away, since he was still so close. "It doesn't matter! Okay! I can't do it, so it doesn't matter!"
"It matters to me. Because I'm asking." Leo insisted, hands braced backwards onto the puzzle and separating out the few pieces they'd gotten together. "It's truth, you have to answer."
"I could switch to dare." Donnie said, annoyed.
"Then I'd dare you to tell me the truth."
"That's cheap and you know it."
Leo just stared at him, still leaning back and waiting. Completely dead set and expectant that Donnie would crack. 
"There's nothing more to say." Donnie said, swallowing and feeling how his throat was sore. "I have projects that only a radioactive isotope can satisfy."
"Okay?" Leo prompted. Waiting for the expected info-dump. 
"Why do you care?" Donnie snapped. "Weapons. Big, powerful weapons, that would obliterate anyone who dared mess with our family. And – a-and unlimited power. And heat. For our home. Okay? Are you happy? Because we don't to have those things anyway, so it doesn't matter."
Grim triumph washed over Leo's expression, and he leaned forward to ask, "Do you think we'd want that at the expense of your life?"
"I wasn't going to die!" Donnie exclaimed. "And if I have the power to make our lives better, safer, more efficient, shouldn't I take it? Shouldn't I push the laws of the universe to give us everything we deserve when we're trapped underground like rats?"
"That stuff is pretty important, but it's not more important than you." Leo said, slowly. 
Donnie smacked his hand against the floor and blurted, "That's what I'm good for, so yeah, it is!"
Leo's expression flashed and he gave a low growl. He lunged forward and caught Donnie in a roll, sending the two of them tussling into the dresser. A loud thud made the wall shake. Donnie kicked Leo in the shins. Leo elbowed Donnie in the solar plexus. 
"Boys!" Splinter knocked loudly on the door. "No killing each other!"
"Yes Dad!" Donnie and Leo recited together, stalled mid-fight, waiting for the footsteps to disappear before struggling apart.
"What was that for?" Donnie rubbed his plastron, scowling.
"For basing your self worth on what you provide for this family." Leo straight up threw puzzle pieces at him, scattering unicorn bits all over the carpet. "Don't be ridiculous. You're so much smarter than that. If we only let people in because they're useful then I woulda been kicked out years ago."
"That's not true." Donnie protested. 
"That's not the point." Leo rolled his eyes. "It doesn't matter who's useful or not. You're one of us forever. No take backs. You don't have to superfit the lair with big weapons and make us completely self-sustaining or whatever. Dad only let you start doing upgrades because you were having fun. If you're doing it to earn your place here then I'll burn your lab down."
"It's fun." Donnie said, quickly, because Leo had an affection for fire that should not be tempted. "Fine. I hear you. I will be satisfied with projects that bring me joy and not radiation poisoning. Can we finish this puzzle or did you actually swallow that piece?"
Leo's severe expression melted, and he reached behind Donnie's non-existent ear and revealed the unicorn horn piece flipping over his knuckles. "Looks like you had it rattling around in your big head this whole time."
"Hah. Caught you." Donnie grinned. "If you cheated on that dare now you gotta do one that's twice as bad." 
Leo swore.
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catboybiologist · 2 days ago
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Wanted to ask about this for a while but you had asks off, you mentioned having experienced hetero(ish) relationships from "both sides", so like, do you have any interesting observations or perspectives you think most people don't know about?
Ah yes, the bisexual transgender eye. There's lots to say here, and I don't think much of it hasn't been said before. I don't think my observations are limited to what I'm rambling about here, but here's some surface level ones.
Btw, this is probably going to be my post with the most weirdly gendered thing of anything I've posted here. I hope its abundantly clear that I don't think any of this intrinsic or morally good, its just my observation on how heterosexuals act towards each other while dating. This isn't about the boxes men and women should be in, its about the boxes that society has put them in.
I think that dating apps are intensifying stereotypical "masculine" and "feminine" dating roles in heterosexual relationships. Eg, encouraging men to "take the intitiative", oftentimes enabling harassing behavior in the process. This, in turn, forces women to screen and shut down men extremely harshly. Except, because of the entire dynamic that's being set up now, this makes a lot of men think women are "playing the game", and again, enables harassment from them.
I recently deleted all my dating apps, but even before then, I had them set to women and enbies/other only for a long time. Her was my primary app, but it has a very small userbase where I live.
Irl, men absolutely take the initiative more than women, but less aggressively than online. There's a huge added element of fear because of the in person aspect, however, and when meeting up, men can be extremely pushy.
The "toxic girlboss" angle of this is that this is often fun to play with. If you're clearly communicating in a serious context, and have established systems of consent that extend to communication as well as the bedroom, playing with "the chase" is... intoxicating. Having a man wrapped around your finger is really fucking fun. It has to feel safe and fun for both parties involved, though. You need to be able to "break character" at any point and have direct conversations, either about boundaries or directly communicating a want or need.
Obviously I haven't publicly been a woman for very long, so my experience isn't vast and limitless or anything. But I've had a few wonderful romantic entanglements with men already. Luckily for me, one of these is ongoing 😘
As for some of the people I've talked to, but never gotten far with.... cishet men are really stupid. I'm sorry but like. Y'all are. There's a lot to be said about how society normalizes male incompetence in heterosexual relationships (eg, the dopey husband stereotype) but I think this also extends to the early stages of a relationship. Men very frequently bitch and moan about "games" while not realizing that they play just as many "games" themselves. Oftentimes, those games involve being overly pushy with everything, and then not communicating their own limits and what they want out of a situation, expecting women to figure it all out for them. Eg, they want to bring forward unlimited energy and pushiness, but expect women to be the ones that whittle them down to what they actually want. This applies both romantically and sexually. Men have a lot of emotional needs, of course, and yes its a problem that they're often not met. But a huge part of that is society discouraging them from openly communicating what they want.
I guess to summarize all of this, I feel like so much of modern dating is essentially a process of elimination, where men are constantly encouraged to push and say yes, and women are constantly encouraged to shut them down for their own safety, and if they're lucky, they eventually reach a healthy dynamic by sheer process of elimination. Which... really isn't fun, and leaves a lot of room open for frustration.
Queer relationships and flirting provide a lot of open communication that hetero dynamics don't. I've had the most luck in "heterosexual" dynamics with queer or queer adjacent people, and literally everyone I've ever gotten past the initial stages of "talking" with has been at least a little bi, by their own admission. It's not that straight men aren't interested in me, or that straight women weren't interested in me before, its just that these are the people who will understand my existence as a queer woman the best and communicate with me the most openly.
I probably could say more, but that's a summary, I guess. I know its weird and stereotypical, but unfortunately, heterosexual dating is pretty much the most gendered possible environment you could be in. I feel like Jane Goodall in there sometimes, but hey. Ya gotta do what you gotta do.
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