#saying 'fuck' instead of the actual lines in the song 'Interjections' is still the funniest thing no matter how many times we do it

[2nerd4this]

Theatre Shenanigans

I'm stage managing for my college's production of SchoolHouse Rock Live!, and just in the first few rehearsals we've made a wonderful collection of quotes. (italicized is actual scripted lines)

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Cast: *singing* Mother Necessity, where would we be?

Music Director: On measure 25, that's where we'd be

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Dina, (about Lolly, Lolly Lolly): This seems a lot like child exploitation, where are the labor laws?

Stage Manager: It also seems like a terrible business strategy. How do they make money if all the adverbs are free?

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Tom: George? What are we waiting for?

George: The President

Tom: You mean Joe?

George: No, Joe is backstage. I mean Bill

Tom: Bill?

George: That's me!

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Tom: Listen to all those congressmen arguing. Is all that discussion and debate about you?

George: Lol no. They still can't decide which Republican they hate the least

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Dina: Do you realize how many pronouns you just used?

Dori: Enough to put a conservative into a coma!

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Music Director: So, there's a note in the script that we can change the lyrics about Pluto, since it's not actually-

Dina: Hold the fuck up!

Joe: Oh, absolutely not. I don't care what the astronomers or whoever the hell say

Assistant Stage Manager: I took an astronomy class, I know why its not considered a planet, and I still think they're dumb

Music Director: ...okay. Got it. Not changing the lyrics

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George: Darn! You just lost the game!

Tom: Aw god damn, now you made me lose the game

Everyone: Noooo please, now we've all lost the game!

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Dina *singing*: He worked hard and pulled the switch, he was smart...

Shulie *yelling*: And a bitch!

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(and now for my personal favorite)

Dina *singing*: So when you're happy-

All (including the directors) *shouting*: Fuck!

Dina: Or sad...

All: Fuck!

Dina: Or frightened...

All: Fuck!

Dina: Or mad...

All: Fuck!

Dina: Or excited...

All: Fuck!

Dina: Or glad...

All: Fuck!