#say what I said about how he's been doing with the tyre prep

[charles-leclerc-official]

It does feel pretty good that Charles has just been confirming everything I have been saying about the SF-24 and his specific tyre management and warming issue improvement across the season so far.

Charles I am so glad I can read you through your car and driving.

[callmewrinkles3]

Phone Call

Summary: While sitting waiting for their hotel room to be available the day after Silverstone, Em gets a phone call that changes the rest of her year.

July 2023

It was supposed to just be an easy day, relaxing in the hotel while Blake and Dan had their meetings in Red Bull to prep for the tyre test and what Dan needed to do to be in contention for next year. A couple of hours later her phone rang, Em going out to the lobby to take the call.

“Hey Baby, what’s happening?”

“I know we said next year. I know. But how do you feel about finding somewhere to live in Faenza for the rest of the year?”

Her heart felt like it had stopped. This year. She couldn’t believe it.

“Seriously? I’m in public I can’t really talk. But what’s the details?”

“Helmut gave Nyck till Silverstone to get on Yuki’s level, he hasn’t done it. If the tyre test goes well tomorrow then it’s mine if I want it. But I promised you this year. And you’re pregnant. You won’t be able to go to the last races. I just..fuck.”

“Will you regret it if you say no?” It was quiet between them for a moment, the ease between them simple.

“Yeah. I will.”

Em took a deep breath before looking around the hotel, spotting people in team gear. She’d said yes already, but this felt different. “Then you do it .”

“You sure you’re ok with me taking it?”

“Yeah. It’s not going to be easy, but we did it before. We can do it again. I can’t totally talk, but do it. It’ll be fine.”

“Thank you Emmy.”

“Go prove you deserve it. I’ll see you soon. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Em stared at her tablet as she went back into the bar, staring at the mock up for the baby’s nursery that she’d been working on. Instead she pulled up one of her old travel spreadsheets and made a copy, getting to work with planning. This was going to be insane.

“What’s going on?” Charlie asked, Em shaking her head.

“It’s about what we talked about last night, Dan had to tell me something, I’ll tell you when we’re in one of the rooms?” Her words were clear enough that Charlie knew it was serious but didn’t reply, working out what she was doing for the week. It was working remote and running her sessions remotely where possible, but with the kids that wasn’t always a thing.

Finally Dan and Blake got back as their hotel rooms were ready, the four going up and piling into Dan and Em’s room. He’d organised a room with a balcony that looked over Silverstone for Em to watch the tyre test as he drove. When everyone was sitting down Dan spoke.

“If my times tomorrow are representative of the times I’ve been doing in the sim, I’ll be announced as an Alpha Tauri driver on Friday morning.”

The shock fully hit Em, staring at him as she felt the baby move. This is real. It’s happening. Oh god.

“Nyck’s seat?” Charlie asked and Dan nodded. “Does he know?”

“Marko gave him till Silverstone but he hasn’t improved. The gap with Yuki hasn’t changed at all. I think he thinks he’ll have till the summer but that won’t happen. Christian told me this is an audition for the big one. I heard some of the mechanics talking. Checo and Carola had a fight after the race on Sunday.”

“Poor girl.” Em was quiet for a moment. “So Friday? That’s soon. How does it feel?”

“Terrifying. But I’ll get there. You ready to be a wag again? Charlie are you ok with this? I know it wasn’t what you planned.”

“We’ll make it work. I…you belong in a car, Dan. You do. Blake and I can work out, right?”

“Yeah we will.” Em watched Blake take her hand and squeeze, holding onto her tightly. “Chuck comes first, if I need to go I’m going.”

“If you need to go I’m booking your flight myself. You made sure Dan and I made things work, it’s our turn now. But this is happening? We’re all good with it?”

“Yeah. It is. Fuck. I’m driving in a race in two weeks.”

After the four of them ate a late lunch they agreed to chill out in their own hotel rooms for the night. Dan pulled Em into his side as she ran her fingers through his curls.

“Have you told your parents yet?” Em asked quietly.

“Not yet. Not till it’s official? I don’t want them to think it’ll happen till it does. Plus they’ll ask about Mike and that…yeah. Fuck.”

“Oh Baby, I know. I know.” It still hurt that they didn’t speak anymore, that the hug she’d given him at Silverstone was the only time she’d seen him since her wedding. But she’d come home to see him leave the house in anger, Dan unwilling to talk about everything in their fight. She still missed her big brother so much, and spending weekends in the same hotel and garage would be surreal.

“Fuck. It’s just shit. He was my best man and two days later. It’s shit.”

“I know. And I can’t say anything else. But you won’t be working closely with him. And maybe it’ll thaw things.”

“Yeah, maybe.”

Em kept running her fingers through his hair, kissing Dan’s forehead. It had to be ok. It had to be.

[leqclerc]

Is Fred becoming binotto 2.0? He's completely incapable of taking accountability for any errors from the team. He'd prefer making his driver look like a liar. In one interview he says that we must check what happened, maybe it's the tyre blanket, maybe we got stuck in the pit lane too long. The next interview he's saying I don't know what charles is talking about, the tyres were in the right temperature window. We all heard the team radio of charles being told his fronts are cold, so I don't get why he does theses media games when all it does is show that he's disengenious. Taking accountability shows so much more leadership abilities than this tactic of burying his head in the sand binotto style. My god, when will charles get a tp who will fully back him and not shelter the team at his expense. All the other top drivers have had that at some point in their career besides charles. I hate this

Coming back to this ask now that the weekend's done and we got more info on this.

So as it stands, Charles went back on what he said after qualifying and stated that regardless of the tyre temps he should've done a better job as a driver, which. Wasn't there a video going around from like Charles's side of the garage that shows one of the mechanics struggling with the tyre blankets on the front left, I believe? Something about wires having to be replaced pretty last-minute.Seems like a bigger issue than just driver error or poor prep. I know Charles is a perfectionist and he's the first to point the blame in his own direction but how can a driver perform to the best of their ability if he can't trust the tools at their disposal in the garage? And iirc Carlos also suggested his Q3 crash was down to cold tyres, which again, indicates there's something going on on the technical side in the garage.

As for Fred himself... I've got personal beef with him ngl 🧍🏻I still think the Xavi situation was handled extremely poorly on his side and I will die on that hill. I would be lying if I said that didn't sour me on him. I get wanting to try something different, but then have a staff reshuffle during the off-season, instead of confirming he's continuing with the driver and then changing your mind, what, five races into the season? And then Charles having to clarify that not only was it not his decision, it was also taken quite suddenly and without his knowledge. No reason why they couldn't have waited it out until the summer break or, hell, at the very very least made the situation clear to Charles ahead of time so he could have proper closure after the race instead of being blindsided and finding out between races that the race engineer he's worked with for the past five seasons is just????? Not only being replaced by someone else but apparently being removed from his side of the garage altogether. What little acknowledgement Fred/Ferrari gave him afterwards heavily implied they were the ones to pull the trigger because Fred thought "if they can have something better why not go for it." One day someone will say the same about him when he's on the way out. That's not to say Bryan is doing a bad job, but yeah, it still doesn't sit right with me, how everything went down and how Fred handled it.

From what I see across social media the fans kind of flip flop on him, depending on the results. One week he's being criticized for his vague statements and giving explanations incongruous with what Charles has been saying, and the next he's being touted as everyone's favourite bald guy because Charles won Monaco and they held hands and jumped into the water together. The way he's been fraternizing with Zak Brown and McLaren is also A Choice and he's been getting heat for it from some in the Lecfosi circle online, who think it's a bad look for him to be goofing around with the TP of a rival team that outdeveloped Ferrari and is now running away with the constructors' championship, and that he should put more effort into protesting their latest inventions.

So I'm definitely side-eyeing him but objectively it's probably too early to definitively say he's heading for a Binotto-style downfall, at least for the time being. The team has generally cleaned up their act in terms of strategy, making sensible tyre choices, pretty smooth pitstops—eliminating or at least mitigating all of those gremlins that consistently tripped up the drivers, and Charles particularly bore the brunt of, under Binotto. Under his leadership Charles and Ferrari delivered that long-awaited Monaco win and a second Monza victory, which I think will placate most fans at least until the end of the season. It's like, they're not having their best ever season and they're not really in the mix in terms of the championship crown, but they've had memorable performances and depending on the weekend can solidly be second-best so in that sense I think he's still got more of a grace period going for him compared to Binotto. And, much like with Binotto, I think the first big indicator of him being on thin ice will be a very visible disconnect between him and Charles. Monaco 2022 was a warning sign but Silverstone was the final nail in the proverbial coffin of Binotto's career as Ferrari TP.

I do wonder how much of the "sheltering the team at Charles's expense" is just in the job description of a Ferrari TP. Historically Ferrari has placed a lot of emphasis on optics and protecting the good name of the team.

At any rate it'll be interesting to see how Fred handles the situation next year and beyond, with Charles and Lewis at the team, particularly if there's more to play for and more at stake.

[landinoandco]

|Shutter speed|

Chapter two : A New Beginning

{Lando Norris x Reader}

Summary: A photographer. A pair of F1 drivers. Triangles. A sticky situation of morals and fighting fate. What could go wrong?

Warnings: none :) apart from a mention of grief and passing of a loved one

Rating: teen and up

Word count: 2.9 k 

A/n: welcome to the second chapter of 'Shutter speed.'

I'm going to start a taglist so comment on this post or message me if you would like to be added :)

Previous chapters: Chapter one

Chapter two: A new beginning

By the time Georgie had raced home, it had stopped raining and the sun was beginning to fight its way through the mass of clouds that had filled the sky. The journey home had given Georgie plenty of time to think - to mull everything over about the crazy afternoon she had just endured. They had finally booked their first event since lockdown, the insanely attractive stranger she had met in the coffee shop but somehow it all ended back to a person she thought she had finished thinking about - not that you ever could. Her Theo. Her lovely Theo. 

Theodore was her childhood sweetheart. Theo was everything to her, llike Georgie was everything to him. They had their whole future planned out: travelling around the world and experiencing different cultures, photographing their entire experience and showcasing the beginning of their journey through life on an Instagram they had set up. Before settling down and starting a family of their own. Together. It was going to finish like all the fairy tales did...

And everybody lived happily ever after.

In hindsight, they had jinxed themselves before they had even started, not long after they had finished their A - levels and about to start their next chapter at Uni - Theo had fallen ill. Georgie refuses to acknowledge the illness for she believes it shouldn’t be the way he is remembered, instead reminiscing on the short but meaningful life he lived. Theo died not long after he was diagnosed, leaving Georgie behind with a new and tainted meaning to happily ever after because if it wasn’t with him then what did it truly mean? 

As they say hindsight is a wonderful thing.

Even now, 5 years on, 23 years of age, she is still plagued with the memories and the thoughts of everything they could have had but for some reason the universe was against it all. She hated to think of herself as unlucky because she was blessed to have met Theo in the first place. 

Shaking the memories from her head, she unlocked the apartment door and trudged through - hanging her coat and bag on the hooks then making her way over to the breakfast bar. On top was a fluorescent post-it note that read: “Popped into the city to pick up some new lenses for the cameras. Fill you in when I get back. Fancy getting a takeaway tonight to celebrate? Love you lots ~ Maisie.” 

A takeaway was exactly what was needed. She thought. And a nice warm shower. 

The thing Georgie loves about showers is that they give her the ability to find an answer and solution to pretty much everything and anything. She spent a lot of time in the shower after Theo passed, it was the only thing she could justify enjoying. Striping her clothes off and chucking them into a pile on the floor, she reached into the shower to turn it on - the water immediately rushing out and crashing loudly onto the floor. As soon as she was happy with the temperature, she stepped in - letting the warm water droplets wash all of her worries away. It was the only thing that she felt helped her relax; come to terms with everything she was feeling. 

Her first and main worry was what they were going to do after Goodwood. If they didn’t find consistent work soon they were going to run out of money - they were lucky to have made some good investments and savings leading up to this point to have coped through lockdown. 

Georgie grabbed the shampoo and rubbed it thoroughly through her long waves. She had been to Goodwood a few years back -  Theo had taken her. It was the best date she had ever been on - she remembered it as clear as day. They had found an empty bench to sit on next to the hill the cars climbed in the ever popular annual hill climb - it was there and then they had decided they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together and travel the world. 

Stepping back under the water, she let the water take the shampoo away, watching as the bubbles slipped through the drain. Theo had been a massive formula one fan - dragging Georgie into the sport as well. Jenson Button had been his favourite driver and McLaren his favourite team so naturally that was hers as well. As soon as he passed Georgie had nothing to do with the sport - she refused to watch it and stopped keeping up with the teams. 

She reached for the conditioner bottle, pressing her lips together in a tight line. All of this thought about Theo and the racing world she turned her back on - a slight regret forming in the pit of her stomach, was she ready to go back to it? She remembered the atmosphere of Goodwood when she had been, people from all over the world gathered to celebrate the one thing they had in common: their love for cars. She was slightly envious of the people who got to travel the world, following in the car's tyre tracks and capturing the moments you only get to experience once in a lifetime. 

Georgie paused and furrowed her eyebrows, she was struck with an idea. Whether it was absolutely brilliant or outright stupid and unrealistic, she was yet to find out. Hoping out of the shower and grabbing her towel, she made her way to her room. It was worth a look, she supposed, there was no harm in that. Once she was dressed, she sat at her desk and turned on her laptop; begging fate to be on her side today. 

“Honey, I’m home.” Called a voice from the kitchen. 

“Hey sweetie.” Georgie shouted back, “I’ll be with you in just a moment.” 

She pulled up the McLaren careers page, her mouse hovering over the view jobs link. Georgie was ready to travel the world. She was ready to experience life again - after all it was Theo’s dying wish that she completed everything they were setting out to do. Perhaps she was selfish for not coming to this conclusion sooner. 

She clicked. 

Taking one last deep breath, Georgie placed her hands to her forehead and moved her face closer to the screen as she read through the roles. Tyre performance engineer. No. Finance analyst - production. Definitely not. Hope was diminishing rapidly even though it was as she had expected. The chances of finding anything suitable were low. She was coming to the bottom of the list when a role jumped out at her. But not impossible apparently. 

Lead photographer - team. 

And the deadline was Tuesday at 11.59 pm. They had the best part of 6 hours to complete this application. It was going to be tight but possible. 

She jumped up and rubbed her hands over her face in disbelief. Running her hands through her hair, she sat back down - hardly being able to keep still. It was only an application advert - many people were going to be applying. She thought as she exhaled loudly. More experienced people. Skimming through the description and requirements, she almost felt like she was dreaming. It was perfect. The role was to travel with the whole team and capture every moment to later be used on social media and advertising. 

“Everything alright in here?” Maisie poked her head around the door. She was faced with an almost tearful Georige. Her words almost trailed off.

“Do you want to travel the world?” Georgie asked her, her voice wavering slightly.  Maisie seemed taken aback as she moved into the room and sat on Georgie’s bed. “I’m sorry - what? Have you forgotten what’s been going on recently?”

“With a formula one team, Mclaren to be precise.” Georgie corrected and moved aside so Maisie could see the screen. Silence fell between the pair as Maisie read on, Georgie’s leg had started bouncing in anticipation. Minutes later she was met with a frown. “That’s not quite how I had imagined you would react.” Georgia mumbled, sighing. She mirrored her friend's expression, chewing on her bottom lip. 

“Before we start fantasizing, I just want to make sure you’re ok with this.” Maisie said softly, taking one of Georgia’s hand in hers. Georgia nodded slowly, rubbing her thumb over her friend’s hand. “This would be his dream. I know he’s watching us - he really is looking out for us, Maise. I want to do it for him.”  

Maisie’s smile grew, “As long as you’re sure. Come, let’s discuss it over take away and I will explain how this weekend is going to work.” Georgie stood up, grabbing her laptop and a notebook, “One thing is for sure. We are going to need one hell of a portfolio.” 

It was now Sunday - the final day at Goodwood. 

To say the rest of their week leading up to this point went smoothly would be a lie. In the end it all got a bit complicated. They submitted their application at 10:58 pm that Tuesday evening - due to it only being a singular role they applied as their business in hope that the combined experience would set them apart from other candidates. Wednesday they spent the day prepping for Goodwood - trying out the new lenses and practising photographing cars they found around London. They were going to watch the Goodwood livestream on Youtube Thursday and Friday to see what they were going to be faced with that Saturday. Until Maisie received a call. It was Mclaren and they had gotten through to the interviews - all taking place that Thursday afternoon on teams. As it turns out, they wanted to have hired someone for the role by Friday in order to be ready for the British Grand Prix the following weekend. 

“I mean it makes sense,” Maisie said, blowing her coffee to cool it down before taking a long sip. “It is their home grand prix after all.” 

Georgie chuckled, “It’s just, I feel like if we were to explain to anyone they would think we were making this up. It’s all happening so quickly.” 

That Friday, ahead of their debut at Goodwood on the Saturday, they got the call. According to the lady Maisie spoke to, it was very close between them and another candidate but the fact they were working at Goodwood tipped the scales in their favour. 

“And.” Maisie started. “We are going to meet with a man called Zac Brown on Sunday, he is the CEO of McLaren Racing-” Georgie was very lucky to have Maisie as she was the businessman - or women in this case - out of the pair. Her people skills were unmatched, how she did it Georgie would never understand. 

Now on Sunday, Georgie was quite sad to see it coming to an end. The atmosphere was one that she had never quite experienced before - it was one that filled her with pride and adoration; something she hadn’t felt in a long time, not to this extent anyway. The whole weekend, a beaming smile had been plastered onto her face - so much so that her facial muscles were beginning to ache. The whole community of people were ecstatic to be there, watching on in excitement as a sport that had missed the company of their crowds opened its doors once again. It wasn’t long before she had agreed to meet with Maisie ahead of their meeting with Zac Brown that she found herself walking up the infamous hill. The loud buzz of conversation seemed to fade, instead the only sound she could hear was the rumble of engines as they came cruising by. She stopped at a clearing where a bench stood proudly, smiling softly to herself as she slung her camera strap over her shoulder, stuffing her hands into her trouser pockets. It hadn’t aged a day. 

Lando Norris had decided to take a break from the main McLaren marquee - he had just finished his final drive of the day and was looking for some time to reflect on the weekend he had just had after having the honour of driving the three cars that Aryton Senna won McLaren their championship titles. It had been a tough season leading up to this point - after Carlos left to join Ferrari he felt this year all eyes would be on him. Many expected Lando to fall into the shadow of his new teammate Daniel Ricciardo, everybody expected him to fade back into the background. Perhaps that was why he trained so hard during the winter break - he had pushed himself right up to the limit. Lando wanted to prove to himself more than anyone else that he was a good driver and he did have potential to fight those at the top, after the taste of a podium in Austria - he was hungry for more. Even as a young boy during his karting career, Lando put pressure on himself - to strive to be the best on the grid - sometimes it meant he forgot to enjoy himself because he was so worried about what other people thought about him. 

He had reached a clearing past the trees. All weekend he had kept half an eye out for the girl at the coffee shop. Part of him was disappointed not to have seen her, he really wanted that second chance. He came to a stop and checked his watch - it wasn’t long until Zac wanted him back; he mentioned briefly about a pair of photographers joining the team. They would be replacing his friend Jason after he decided that travelling just wasn’t practical anymore, who could blame him, his first child was on the way and he wanted to be there with his wife every step of the way. 

Lando brushed a hand through his curls, casting his gaze around before he would make his way back. When a bench caught his eye or more specifically the girl sitting on the bench. She sat with a content smile dancing on her lips, a reminiscent glaze coated her eyes. He took a step towards her, there was something familiar about her. It was like his feet were frozen in place - his brain was telling him to go back but his gut told him to stay put. He stood for a minute or two before it hit him - square in the face and quite frankly he couldn’t believe his luck. It was the girl from the coffee shop. Right in front of him. It was now or never. Lando took a calming breath before going and sitting next to her. 

Georgie was rudely pulled from her thoughts when a person sat down on the bench next to her. She moved her head slightly to see who the intruder was when her heart stopped. Recognition dawned on her face. Georgie knew instantly he had recognised her as the corners of his mouth twitched into a shy smile. “Hi.” His tone silvery and almost breathy. 

“Hey.” She beamed back, “I’m Georgie.” She said, gazing up at him, admiring the way the sun caught around his halo of curls giving them an almost angelic glow.

“Lando.” He told to her, the corners of his eyes crinkled slightly. Neither of them could quite believe that they were sitting with each other. 

“I - uh - It’s a wonderful day for it, isn’t it.” Georgie had panicked. She didn’t know what else to say and her mother used to always say:  ‘if in doubt talk about the weather.’ It was something along those lines anyway.  Silently cursing herself, she cringed at her awkwardness only to hear him chuckle at her comment. 

“It’s much better now the rain has cleared off.” Lando instantly felt relaxed around her, he didn’t know what it was. Perhaps it was that she seemed just as socially inadequate as he was. “So Georgie.” He savoured the way her name rolled off his tongue. “What brings you to Goodwood? I hope you don’t mind me saying this but I heard you talking about it before you rushed off the other day.” 

Georgie inched closer, almost leaning into the comfort and warmth he seemed to provide. “My friend and I are photographers and she somehow got us into working for the Goodwood Festival of Speed brand. I still don’t quite know how she did it, for some reason she didn’t want to talk about it.” She trailed off, a pink tinge creeping onto her cheeks as she had come to a rather astonishing conclusion. The corner of Lando’s mouth lifted at her innocence. “Anyway.” She moved on quickly. “As it turns out I am also here to meet my new boss.” 

“It’s almost like it was meant to be.” Lando quirked. “Who are you working for now?” 

“I’m the new photographer for the McLaren formula one team.” She explained, pride laced in her tone. Lando’s eyes widened, his mouth fell open in disbelief before he caught himself. Composed his expressions and stated very plainly...

“I’m Lando Norris. I drive for the McLaren formula one team. As it turns out you and I are about to attend the same meeting.” 

Taglist: (please message me or leave a comment if you would like to be added :))

@mjuikoli​ @httplayer​ @phatyak​

[one-boring-person]

Hi! I was wondering if you could write more for Dutch from Predator? Lol it's me btw! I was wondering if it could be a hate to love relationship, where Dutch, being the hardass he is, can't live down his pride, and the reader (preferably female), is a strong independent woman who is actually Poncho's little sister, learning from the best. To add on, can the reader be short as Arnie is so tall, and because I am only 5'2" irl?

I kind of combined this with the enemies-to-lovers prompt request, I hope that's ok! I hope you like this!😊💛

Old Habits Die Hard.

Alan "Dutch" Schaefer (Predator 1987) x reader

Warnings: NSFW, smut, swearing, mention of violence, alcohol consumption

Masterlist

"This round's on me, what does everyone want?" Mac announces as we go to sit down at the table, the mercenary remaining standing.

"A beer sounds good." Poncho says, looking at the rest of us.

We give words of agreement, taking our respective places at the table as Mac goes to leave the room and go to the bar.

"Don't forget a soda, I don't think they sell alcohol to underage people here." Dutch chips in, flashing a pointed look in my direction.

"Very funny." I roll my eyes, forcing a smile as the others chuckle, "A beer is fine, Mac. Thanks."

He nods, ducking from the room we rented out for the evening, leaving the five of us alone.

"So what's all this about, Dutch? Got us another job?" Blain questions, the gruff man leaning back in his chair, jaw working languidly at the gunk in his mouth.

"Yeah, but this one's a bit different." The major replies, taking a cigar from his pocket and lighting it.

"Different? How?" Hawkins frowns, cokcing his head to the side.

Dutch takes a deep breath of smoke from the cigar, sitting back in his seat.

"An old friend from the army got in touch. Says he needs us for a rescue op."

"Friend from the army? Who?" I inquire, lifting an eyebrow.

"Old commander of mine." Dutch replies dismissively, barely sparing me a glance.

"Ok, where is the job?" Poncho asks, my brother shooting me a knowing look, his eyes flicking up as Mac walks in again, seven beers cradled in his arms.

"What job?" He asks as he places the bottles down on the table, looking round at us all.

"Dutch got us another op." Blain grunts, reaching out to take his beer, spitting the contents of his mouth out into the ashtray on the table. Hawkins, Poncho and I pull faces at that, but don't say anything.

"Another one? We only just got back!" Mac exclaims, taking a seat across from Hawkins, taking a sip from his beer.

"Perks of the job." Dutch shrugs, exhaling a cloud of smoke.

"Will you at least tell us what it is?" I can't keep the impatience from my voice, finding his vagueness irritating.

"I'm getting to it, (Y/n), calm down." He rolls his eyes, "It's in central America, somewhere in the jungle. Phillips was cagey about where exactly, but he said it's got something to do with guerrillas and hostages. We're supposed to get the hostages out of there."

"Sounds simple enough." Billy muses, rubbing his chin.

"When is it?" Poncho chips in, watching the major closely.

Dutch is quiet for a minute, his eyes flicking over us all, before he finally responds.

"It's tomorrow."

I nearly choke on my beer, spluttering as I sit upright in my chair.

"Tomorrow? Are you insane?!" I burst out, annoyed, "We got back from Afghanistan at the ass-crack of dawn today, and you want us to fly off to the jungle at the same time tomorrow? You trying to kill us or what?"

The others nod in agreement, murmuring their own complaints, only to shut up when Dutch turns a venomous glare on me.

"You know, if you spent half the energy you do on complaining on growing, you wouldn't look like a damn child anymore, (Y/n). Would make taking jobs a lot easier - means I don't have to explain why we've only got six and half mercs with us." He snaps, voice laced with anger, "I'm not insane, just practical. We all need more money, and the work is low at the moment. You'd know that if you weren't off lounging at home all day, letting us do the hard planning and prep work."

Silence descends on us all, my jaw dropping at the vehemence behind his words. No one speaks, letting the two of us stare at each other in hatred, my expression swiftly creasing into fury, every muscle in my body going tense.

Another moment passes, before I suddenly stand from the table, slamming my bottle on the table as I stalk past, heading straight out the door. Poncho tries to stop me, calling out to me, but I ignore him, practically seething as I leave the bar and stride to the car my brother and I came in. Unlocking it, I climb in and slam the door, buckling myself into the driver's seat as I throw the car into drive, pulling out onto the road. 

Furious, I drive way over the speed limit, weaving in and out of the traffic with no regard for my own safety as I careen down the highway. Screeching horns and tyres follow me as I go, but I ignore them, focusing instead on getting home, filled with anger now as Dutch's words play over and over in my head. 

It doesn't take long for me to pull up in the drive of my house, the car skidding on the loose gravel as I harshly jerk the handbrake into place, unbuckling myself before I climb out, making my way over to the door. Opening it, I go in and head straight to the bathroom, intending to take a shower to cool me down, knowing I need to calm down. I strip down quickly, quickly getting under the cold water with my fists clenched at my sides for a while, until I start to massage myself with my fingers, working out the knots in my muscles. It's pleasant, but I can still feel the anger burning in my system, so I swiftly leave again, wrapping myself in a towel. 

As I leave the bathroom, I hear a car pull up in the drive, the tyres crunching loudly on the gravel, announcing the newcomer's arrival. I dismiss it, chalking it up to it being Poncho, come to check up on me as the door downstairs opens, then closes, footsteps sounding in the hall as the person checks for me. The sounds are heavier than I thought they would be, and the identity of the person soon dawns on me.

Immediately, I feel the anger start racing through me again, my face creasing into a scowl until I force myself to calm down, at which point I turn and storm up to my bedroom. Going in, I start to rummage through my wardrobe, looking for some new clothes, trying to bite back the irritation rising in me as I hear the footsteps getting closer, the heavy boots not even halting as they reach the door. Within seconds, the wooden structure has been flung open, an angry mercenary standing in the space behind it.

"Ever learn to knock?" I snap at him as soon as I turn around, glaring at Dutch as he looms in the doorway, "Nevermind, you never learned manners period."

"Says the person who just stormed out of a bar." He scoffs, sneering at me as he steps into the room, "Talk about table manners."

"And whose fault is it I stormed out in the first place?" I glower at him, holding my towel in place as he continues forward, the glint in his eyes sparking a blazing heat inside me.

"Oh, so now it's my fault you can't take a joke?" Dutch jabs his finger at his chest before pointing it at me, brow furrowed in anger.

"You have a pretty poor idea of a joke, asshole." I spit back, lifting my finger up in his face as we step closer together, less than a foot away from each other now.

"You're the only one who thinks so, short-ass." He glares down at me, making me all too aware of how he towers over me.

Swallowing tightly, I shift uncomfortably.

"Sure about that? I can't be the only one who thinks your height jokes are getting old." I reply venomously, jabbing my finger at his chest.

He laughs humorlessly.

"Oh, but we both remember a time when you used to love playing into your shortness." His voice drops an octave, eyes boring into me, "I had you on your knees more than once with only standing over you. Remember?"

A flare of lust goes through me at the reminder, flashes of him looming over me as he pounded his cock harder and harder into my waiting mouth coming, unbidden, to mind. I'd always liked the sight of his muscular body above mine, as well as the feelings of his large hands wrapped around me, even if it was simply to hold my head still whilst he fucked it. 

"That was months ago." I hiss back at him, barely able to look up at him - if I do, it'll be too much like the memories in my head and I'll give in to the urges of my body. Already I can feel arousal pooling in my panties, my cheeks flushing as I realise this.

"Old habits die hard." Dutch growls, before swiftly reaching out to tear the towel away, exposing me to him. Before I can protest, however, he's taken hold of me and lifted me against the wall, pinning me roughly in place with his body, my legs wrapping instinctively around his waist. His lips crash into mine, a mess of teeth and tongues ensuing as we kiss like we used to, wet sounds filling the air as we press closer and closer together. Soft sounds of need escape me, but they're swallowed by the ravenous major above me, who licks and nips at my lips, a few grunts leaving him as he does so. 

Moving to pull him closer, I moan loudly as Dutch jerks his hips into mine, using them to hold me in place, his arousal pressing at my clit through his trousers. I have to bite back whines at the feeling of the rough fabric against my unprotected clit, my slick soon covering the crotch of his jeans as he rolls his hips into me. One of his hands moves to palm roughly at my breast, pinching and rolling the nipple between two calloused fingers, his other hand grasping my ass, which he squeezes tightly. Whimpering into his mouth, I take my nails down his back, grinding my sensitive clit down onto him, enjoying the waves of pleasure emanating from the stimulation. 

Months and months of pent up lust pour through the kiss, only breaking as Dutch pulls back to yank his shirt off, revealing his muscular yet scarred torso to me. Instantly, I go to lick and kiss at the toned muscles, only to yelp indignantly as he takes hold of my hair and jerks my head back, growling as he fastens our lips together again. He presses closer, crushing me against the wall with his huge body, grinding his arousal into me with vigour, only to suddenly pull away, keeping me in his arms. In seconds, Dutch has thrown me on the bed, standing at the end with his hands on his belt. 

Biting my lip, I eagerly move to help him, but he pushes me back down roughly, wasting no time in pulling his trousers and underwear down, revealing his leaking cock to the air. I moan at the familiar sight of it, eyeing up the veined length keenly, following it from the base to the reddened tip, watching as precum beads there. 

Dutch doesn't give me long to admire him, climbing over me and pressing himself against me as soon as he's exposed, his lips moving to my neck. He leaves wet, open-mouthed kisses in his wake, biting at sensitive points as he goes, licking over them briefly each time to soothe them, every movement extracting a needy whine from me. One of his hands moves down to his cock, which he takes hold of and runs through my slick folds, coating the tip generously as he supplies pleasure to me. With every pass over my clit, I moan and rock up into him, clutching at his back. 

"Fuck me, Dutch. Show me how much bigger you are." I moan out, wrapping my legs around his waist.

As he hears my words, however, Dutch growls, leaning back, making my legs fall from where they were. I whine at the lack of contact until he rolls me onto my front, grabbing hold of my ass to knead and grope. 

"I'll show you alright." He practically snarls in my ear as he bends back over me, moulding his huge body to my smaller frame, hands jerking my ass into his hips. He grinds himself into me for a moment, building my pleasure further as he bites at the back of my neck, sending bolts of electricity through me, which I respond to by rocking back onto him. 

With a final grunt, Dutch lines himself up with my hole, surging forwards into me in one stroke, stretching me out as he goes. A half-scream leaves my throat as I feel his cock slide over every sensitive spot inside me, my walls clenching deliciously around him, every vein rubbing against me. He gives me no time to adjust, pulling out entirely before slamming back into me, setting a hard, fast pace that has me seeing stars in no time. Ecstasy races through me, a knot tightening swiftly in my abdomen at the feeling of his thick cock pounding into me. 

Dutch straightens after a moment, taking my hip in one hand whilst he presses my face into the bed with the other, using me as leverage to shove his cock as far into me as he can go, grunting and groaning behind me in pleasure and need. Under his grip, I feel totally immobile, but the thought of him using me to work out his anger sends me reeling, my walls clenching tightly around him, tearing a moan from his lips. His name falls from my own, almost like a mantra as he slams into me, sending bolts of pleasure through me, bringing me closer and closer to what I really want. 

"So close, Dutch...keep going, oh fuck, you're so good…" I moan out, my words muffled slightly by the bed, though they are audible enough for him.

A whine of displeasure echoes from my chest as he suddenly pulls out, my pussy throbbing at the loss. He doesn't wait long, though, rolling me back onto my back before he hikes my legs up onto his shoulders, thrusting roughly back into me. With the new angle, whole other waves of pleasure ripple through me, his cock hitting the very spot that brings me crashing towards an orgasm. The sound of skin slapping together fills the room, along with obscenely wet noises and moans from the two of us, both too caught up in the moment to care about what comes after.

"You're getting tighter, (Y/n)...gonna cum for me, are you?" Dutch groans, his thrusts becoming erratic as my pleasure rapidly builds, "Come on, (Y/n), cum for me!"

With a final scream of ecstasy, the tension inside me snaps and I cum, hard, my walls clenching like a vice around him. White light blinds me, everything disappearing around me as the pleasure floods through me in a great torrent, rendering me incapable of moving momentarily. 

Vaguely, I feel Dutch pound into me a few more times before he pulls out and cums over my stomach, letting out a roar of satisfaction at the sensation, his hand wrapped around himself, jerking his cock desperately. Breathing heavily, he milks himself dry before he slumps over me, smearing the sticky substance between us, the two of us left breathless in the throes of our pleasure. 

"Still as good as I remember." He hums, rolling off of me to lie beside me.

"Could say the same thing." I sigh, trailing a finger through his cooling cum, grimacing at the sight of it.

Groaning, I heave myself up, taking the towel up from the floor.

"Where are you going?" Dutch asks, still lounging on the bed.

"Shower. You should, too." I inform him, moving to leave, only to stop still as the door swings open.

"(Y/n)? Who are you- oh." Poncho blushes a deep red, grimacing as he swiftly ducks back out of the room. 

"Oh shit…" I groan, putting my head in my hands, unable to bite back a small smile.

With just grins, leaning back on his hands.

"Oops."

-

Tag list: @nightime-luna-fairy

[potionsprefect]

Blinding Lights (Ethan x F!MC)

Pairings: Ethan Ramsey x Victoria Clarke

Summary: A night out suddenly takes a terrifying turn

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: slight angst, fluff (especially at the end)

A/N: I posted this on A03 about a month ago and have decided to put it on here as well.

“One more round?”

“Definitely not Jackie, I can barely stand up.”

“Oh come on! Don’t tell me you’re going soft on me Lahela.”

“Okay fine one more, I’m just glad I’m not driving.”

“Yeah you left that to me and Sienna.” Rafael laughed.

“I’m a very safe driver. I passed first time.” Sienna shrugged.

“Nah the best drivers are those who pass third time.” Bryce said.

“Remind me to never get in a car with you.” Aurora looked at Bryce with concern.

“Sure thing Emery.” Bryce patted her on the shoulder.

Victoria and her roommates along with Bryce and Rafael were out for a few drinks at a restaurant across town. The night was slowly wrapping up and they’d be leaving soon, well, as soon as Jackie and Bryce had finished their last drink. Victoria had been staring at her phone for the past 10 minutes, texting Ethan who was at his apartment, waiting for her to come back.

Ethan: Am I going to have to help you through your hangover when you get home?

Victoria: Don’t worry I’m not too drunk. Although there is enough alcohol in me that hugs and kisses will definitely help sober me up.

Ethan: I’ll be waiting for you

Victoria smiled down at her phone. Her and Ethan had been dating for a few weeks and Victoria felt like she was living in a fairytale. She was the happiest she had ever been.

“Victoria are you coming?” Sienna’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts.

“Yeah, and I call shotgun.” Victoria said.

“No way.” Elijah laughed.

“Least drunk gets to sit in the front. And that would be me.” Victoria smirked.

“Just because you can handle your alcohol better than the rest of us.” Jackie stuck her tongue out.

Everyone laughed as they settled into the cars. Victoria put on her seatbelt and Sienna pulled the car out of the car park and onto the main road.

“So how are things between you and Doctor Ramsey?” Sienna asked as they waited at a traffic light.

“Sienna you can call him Ethan outside the hospital.” Jackie laughed.

“Yeah I’m sure he has a life outside Edenbrook, especially now he has Victoria in his life.” Elijah grinned.

“I’m just trying to stay professional.” Sienna shrugged.

“Oh trust me, he’s professional in some aspects.” Victoria winked.

“Okay that’s too much information.” Aurora shuddered.

“You know I didn’t mean intimate details.” Sienna laughed.

“I know you didn’t. Things are really good.” Victoria smiled.

“Do you think he’ll ask you to move in with him?” Jackie asked.

“I don’t know. We’re happy with our current living situations at the moment but who knows what the future holds.” Victoria replied shrugging.

“How many times are we gonna see him in our flat?” Elijah laughed.

“Knowing Victoria, loads.” Jackie laughed.

The traffic light turned green and Sienna pulled the car out further into the road. What she didn’t notice was a truck heading straight into their direction at a terrifying pace.

“LOOK OUT!”

A terrifying scream, the blinding lights from the car, the sound of metal hitting metal, the car being broken up into pieces, the tyres skidding along the road and suddenly, everything went black.

— — — — — — — — — —

Edenbrook was unusually quiet at night. Night shifts usually filled with people who had sustained injuries whilst out at night. However, no traumas had come in and the evening was spent mainly filling out charts from previous patients. That was all about to change.

“We’ve got a double MVA rolling up.” One of the nurses shouted to the group of doctors and nurses around her.

“Okay prep the trauma rooms and make sure the OR’s are free.” Ines said, doctors and nurses hurried to complete the tasks as Ines and Zaid headed out to meet the ambulances, Harper joining them soon after.

“What have we got?”

“Double MVA rolling up.” Ines said.

“And here’s me thinking this Saturday night shift would be peaceful.” Harper sighed.

“This is why we should never jinx it.” Zaid said.

The ambulances rolled up and the doors flung open.

“Doctor Lahela?” Harper said stunned as she watched Bryce jump out of the ambulance alongside Rafael.

“We were in one of the restaurants across town, a car came out of nowhere and crashed right into Sienna’s car. Raf and I were in the car right behind them.” Bryce said.

“Doctor Trinh?” Zaid eyes grew wide as he looked at Sienna who was lying on the gurney, her face covered in blood.

“Getting… harder… to… breathe.” Sienna wheezed.

“She was crushed between the wreckage, we managed to get her out. Victoria, Jackie, Aurora and Elijah are all ok, just minor injuries. They were put into other ambulances.” Rafael explained.

Other doctors and interns wheeled Sienna into the hospital whilst the ambulances carrying Victoria, Jackie, Aurora and Elijah pulled into the bay.

“Are you guys alright?” Ines asked rushing to help the young doctors out of the ambulances.

“We’re fine, Victoria’s got glass in her leg but the rest of us just have minor injuries.” Jackie replied.

“Okay grab a wheelchair for Victoria.”

“No I’m ok, I can walk to the beds.” Victoria said wincing as a wave of pain washed through her.

“Doctor Clarke you’re a patient now not a doctor, let us help you.” Zaid said. Victoria felt now wasn’t the time to argue with the senior doctor so she did as she was told. She got settled into the bed as she got inside the hospital, her other friends taking the beds surrounding them.

“Is it just your leg?” Ines asked examine Victoria’s leg.

“Yeah.” Victoria replied looking towards the room where Sienna was being treated.

“I need a doctor here.” A paramedic yelled from the entrance.

“I’ll go, I’m not badly injured.” Aurora said getting up and heading over to the gurney. “Oh my god, it’s the guy who hit us.”

“What?” Elijah said, wheeling over to help Aurora treat the guy.

“Doctor Mirani, Sienna’s pressure’s dropping.” Danny ran out of the trauma room. Zaid rushed into the trauma room. Before any of the other doctors could look to see what was happening, one of the nurses pulled the blinds shut.

“Oh come on!” Jackie huffed.

“I’m gonna clean the wound and stitch it up. You’re going to be ok.” Ines turned to Victoria.

“Can I still walk on it?” Victoria asked.

“You should do but I advise plenty of rest. I think you know that.” Ines said. “Is there anyone you’d like me to call?”

Victoria hesitated for a moment. Even though everyone at the hospital knew they were an item, it didn’t stop them from gossiping about them behind their backs, despite the majority of it being positive. “Can you call Ethan?”

“Sure no problem.” Ines smiled. Jackie offered to make the call and so Ines got to work on Victoria’s leg. She cleaned the area and then delicately, removed the pieces of glass before stitching up the area. “You’ll be fine walking on it. Come by in three days to have the stitches removed and you’ll be as good as new!”

“Will it leave a scar?” Victoria asked.

“It might do but I wouldn’t worry about it, it’ll be minimal.”

“Can you check on Sienna? I want to know how she’s doing.”

“Sure, they might need my help anyway.” Ines retreated from the room and headed into the trauma room.

“What an evening huh.” Jackie said sitting back down on the bed.

“How did this even happen? Sienna didn’t jump through a red light.” Victoria sighed.

“No but the guy who hit us did. Rafael just told me he was seven times over the limit. He was travelling way faster than the limit.” Jackie said.

“Did he survive?”

“No, he was in v-fib and they couldn’t get him back.” Jackie replied.

“How are you doing?” Bryce and Rafael came and stood by Victoria’s bed.

“Just a couple of stitches, nothing too serious, do you know how Sienna is?”

“She’s stable but she’s going to need surgery. She said she couldn’t feel her legs.” Rafael said.

“Don’t worry I’m going to assist, we’re taking her up now, she’s in capable hands and she’ll be back on her feet in no time.” Bryce laid a comforting hand on Victoria’s shoulder before heading down the corridor to follow the doctors who were wheeling Sienna into the lift.

“Doctors would it be possible for you to answer a few questions for us?” A police detective walked over to them.

“Of course detective.” Victoria said sitting up.

“I’m guessing your Victoria Clarke and Jackie Varma?” The Detective looked at Jackie and Victoria.

“Yes that’s right.” Jackie replied.

“And you are?”

“I’m Rafael Aveiro. I was in the car behind them.”

“Ok Mr Aveiro can you describe what happened?”

“We’d all been out for a few drinks. Sienna and I decided we would drive home so we didn’t have anything to drink. At the end of the night we got into our cars and Sienna pulled out of the car park first, I followed shortly behind her. We were sat at a red light for a couple of minutes before Sienna pulled away and then all of a sudden, a car came out of nowhere and went straight into them.” Rafael explained.

“And Sienna is known as Doctor Trinh to your colleagues?”

“Yes that’s correct.”

“Ok that’s plenty of information. Several witness have also said similar things. I’ll need to speak to Doctor Trinh. Do you know where she is?”

“She’s having surgery at the minute.” Victoria replied.

“Ok, one of our officers will come by in a few days to see how she is. I have to say you were very lucky doctors, very lucky indeed.” The detective bid goodnight and left the hospital.

“Was that a detective?” Aurora and Elijah came over.

“Yeah he was just asking questions about what happened.” Rafael replied.

“Ok well Ines wants us to stay in hospital overnight just as a precaution and we can all be discharged tomorrow morning.” Aurora said.

“I’m staying in the on-call room tonight.” Rafael said.

“Rafael you should go home.” Victoria sighed.

“No I want to be here when Sienna wakes up.”

“If you say so.”

The nurses came in and wheeled Victoria to a private room and lead the others to their separate rooms. Victoria gazed out the window, the city lit bright by the building lights and the moon was shining down on them.

“Victoria?” A voice broke Victoria’s daydream. She turned around to see Ethan rushing into the room and pulling her into his arms. “Thank God you’re alright, I got here as fast as I could. What happened?” He said kissing her forehead.

“A car hit us. It was going really fast. Apparently the driver was drunk. He just came out of nowhere.” Victoria sighed in Ethan’s embrace.

“Were you badly hurt?”

“No just some glass in my leg, I’ll be fine. Sienna came off worst. She’s in surgery right now, she couldn’t move her legs. What if she-“

“No don’t think like that. She’ll be ok. Stay positive.” Ethan said pulling her in for a kiss.

“But none of this would’ve happened if we hadn’t stayed for one more drink. We would’ve avoided him.” Victoria said. She could feel her eyes stinging with tears.

“Hey, hey.” Ethan climbed onto the bed and wrapped his arms around her. He gently stroked her back. “You can’t dwell on what would’ve happened. That guy would’ve hit someone anyway. He shouldn’t have been over the limit and he sure as hell shouldn’t have been driving.”

“I guess you’re right.” Victoria laid her head on his shoulder.

“I’m always right. Now lie down. You need to get some sleep.” Ethan said preparing to get off the bed.

“Ethan?” Victoria lightly grabbed his hand. “Will you stay here tonight? I’d rather not be alone.”

Ethan took his shoes off swung his legs on the bed, he laid down next to Victoria wrapping his arms around he pulling her closer. He gave her a light kiss on the forehead and murmured into her hair.

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

— — — — — — — — — —

Dark grey clouds covered the Boston sky, threatening to spill rain. Victoria woke up and felt the space next to her, remembering where she was and who should be beside her. But there was no one there. As she sat up, the person she was looking for strolled into the room.

“Glad to see you awake. I brought you some breakfast and I’ve got your discharge paperwork. The others have already left.” Ethan smiled sitting on the bed.

“Is Sienna ok?” Victoria asked.

“She came out of surgery well and is in recovery. Bryce says there’s no evidence of paralysis so far.”

“That’s great.”

“Naveen says don’t worry about your shift tomorrow, he’s got it all covered. I’m free to take you home.”

"Does that mean you get to look after me?” Victoria grinned.

“For as long as you need.” Ethan grinned back.

Ethan wheeled Victoria out of her room and helped her get into his car. His hand not leaving hers once he drove to his apartment and got her settled on his couch before he made her a cup of coffee and joined her, wrapping a blanket around her.

“Aren’t you supposed to be working later tonight?” Victoria asked.

“I swapped shifts so I could be with you. Naveen didn’t mind.” Ethan replied.

“I bet he had the biggest grin on his face.” Victoria laughed a little.

“He did. You know he’s one for hospital gossip. He saw the two of us asleep last night. Now the whole hospital knows just how much Doctor Ramsey is in love with Doctor Clarke.”

Victoria sat up a little straighter. “Did you say love?”

Ethan froze. Whatever he meant to say was sure as hell not meant to come out like that. “Oh uh… I hope that wasn’t too sudden. But it may be the truth. I love you Victoria.” Before he could say anything else, Victoria pulled him closer and attached her lips to his.

“I love you too Ethan. Kinda thought it was obvious.” Victoria smirked.

“Well I’d hate to presume anything.” Ethan grinned.

“So you kept it to yourself? Smart.” Victoria smiled. “Now that we’ve confessed our love to each other I think we should do something to celebrate.”

“Oh really? And what exactly did you have in mind?” Ethan said lowering Victoria further onto the sofa, mindful of her leg.

“Well for starters it requires much less clothing.”

Ethan grinned. “What about your leg?”

“Are you going all Doctor on me outside the hospital? I’m not completely crippled. I’ve still got one good leg that can give you a good time. So what do you say?” Victoria whispered into his ear.

Ethan just grinned and pulled her in for a kiss. As he looked down at the woman he loved so much in his arms, he knew that there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her. Absolutely nothing.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed reading it! :) I don’t know why I’m so nervous to post this maybe because it’s my first time.

[prettywordsyouleft]

Breaking Free

Summary: Your whole life had led up to this point, marrying Prince Minhyun had been every girl’s dream. Except yours.

Pairing: Hwang Minhyun x reader

Genre: Royal AU, angst, romance, fluff

Warnings: unhappiness within arranged marriage

Word count: 4416 

You stared into the mirror in front of you, wearing the finest gown you had ever put on. Lush fabric adorned with jewels and intricate embroidery floated around you and you felt exactly like a princess.

A princess.

An audible sigh left and deflated your chest, your best friend Anne coming up to your side. “What’s wrong? I thought you really liked the dress!”

“I do,” you started, your hands gently running over the large skirt and you admired it again in the mirror, despite the sadness within your eyes. “But I didn’t want this either.”

“Oh Y/N, don’t be silly, isn’t it every girl’s dream to grow up and marry a prince?”

Not mine.

Your family had been delighted when two months ago your name had been chosen as the suitable bride for Prince Minhyun. It had been a dream come true for all those around you, after decades of loyal, endless support to the royal family, you were the first descendant to finally propel your family forward.

Any girl would be excited to get this opportunity. But you weren’t.

Ever since you were born into this world, you had been prepped for this moment in time. But you had dreamed of another lifestyle, where you chose the boy you would marry, and further, it would be out of love.

This was far from that fantasy.

It wasn’t that Minhyun was a bad match. From the very small amount of time you had been in his company, he seemed polite and kind. But this wasn’t enough for you to build anything on before accepting marriage. Even with his handsome appearance, good credentials within education, leisure activities and socially, you were unsure if you would have even chosen him to date.

But you didn’t have a choice anyway.

This thought alone darkened your mood and a single tear slipped down your perfectly made complexion at the thought of what was to come.

Today you would be married.

It felt as if it were a blur, the ceremony had been over two hours long, but you were sure you simply blinked and it was over, moving onto an intimate luncheon served by the King and Queen, before another reception holding further guests.

Night time had cascaded down and although you stood at the side of your new husband, you had said less than five words to him since leaving the chapel. It was exhausting, greeting guests, entertaining them, standing for so long in your heels. Although you had been allowed to change into another gown for the reception, you were still unable to feel comfortable, though you wondered if that was down to the situation and not what your body was wearing.

You had taken glances at Minhyun several times throughout the night; his smile never seemed to become jaded. You wondered how he could still appear so genuine, when you were sure everyone would be able to tell neither of you were a true couple. You felt like you were an actress in a lavish show, your smile coming out as part of the role. You stood close but not as close as lovers would, and affection was lost on you both. All the same, well wishes and “you both look like a match made from above” were constantly hitting your ears throughout the evening.

Mocking you.

You had no appetite for dinner and yet you still sat and played out your part, raising your champagne flute for several toasts, laughing at the dry jokes by the jolly cousin of the queen across the table, and answering questions from family relatives that you had practiced as if lines in a play for the past month.

Eventually the appropriate time for you both to leave for your new home within the palace grounds arrived, and you hugged your parents goodbye, a sudden ache growing in your chest as you departed from their sides. The show was over now, and real life was settling in, the grief you felt from now being a daughter to another family hitting you in that moment.

“Let’s go.” The voice near your ear was deep and quiet, causing you to flinch. You glanced up at the tall boy, his hand rising in a wave to those behind you as he gently guided you into his car.

Once enclosed, the atmosphere was thick with distance. The smile had faded completely from Minhyun’s face, and instead his eyes were steely, the only emotion that you could read upon his face. The purr of the classic jaguar and the crunch of the gravel under the tyres were the only sounds for the short drive to your new home. It made you awkward, not knowing how to act around him.

Before when you were both fulfilling your roles, you knew what was expected of you. Now you were not so sure. Should you talk to him? Ask him about himself? What the rules of your new home would be? Of your own chambers? So many questions were rushing around inside you, and yet the aloof demeanour of Minhyun had you hesitating.

The car rolled to a stop and Minhyun hopped out of it, not even glancing back to see if you were following him inside. Dejected, you pulled yourself out of the car and stared up at the manor that would now become the setting for your impending loneliness.

A month went by and you had no time to become accustomed to your life at the castle grounds. It was still quite the upheaval, with no real sign of settling soon. Each day was a bustle, new outfits, new appointments, more interviews. You had spoken so much of your family and marriage that you no longer had to rehearse anything, it was second nature.

It was at night time though that you struggled.

Minhyun was obviously used to his own company, and routine. After dinner he would retire to his study for several hours, and then at precisely ten each night, he would come to find you. At first when he had appeared, you had been hopeful of some kind of bonding to begin.

“Goodnight,” he swiftly greeted, walking back out and leaving you sitting there, perplexed.

Now you were used to smiling lightly and repeating the same word, heading into your own bedroom not long after.

This wasn’t the marriage you had dreamed for.

“So what’s he like?!” Anne leaned forward in the plush armchair in the parlour room, bringing you out of your thoughts. You blinked and noted her eagerness. “He’s so freaking handsome!”

“Looks might be all he has,” you replied with a sigh, glancing out the window and finding the subject of your topic in the yard, talking to one of the gardeners. “I’m not sure what he’s really like.”

“What do you mean?”

“We barely speak, unless we are in an appointment where it’s expected of us. There’s nothing to enjoy about living here with him. He’s cold, and hard to read.”

Anne stared outside at the Prince and then looked back at you. “Really? But he’s so kind and forthcoming to everyone else.”

You nodded, feeling a hint of jealousy at the natural way he was interacting with the old man outdoors. Even though you hadn’t wanted to marry him, you had hoped to somehow make the best of your situation. Your resolve was slowly breaking though, and watching what you wanted occurring around you was difficult to bear.

“Maybe you should start proactively make his life more interesting?” Anne suggested, a sly smile crossing her lips.

You were intrigued, leaning forward to hear of her idea.

“You are simply beautiful, you’re glowing, Y/N!”

You smiled politely, bowing your head a little in gratitude at the woman. “Thank you, Senator Blight.”

“Together you look like such a powerful couple; you will truly bring a new element to the royal family with your youth and modern mindsets.”

Minhyun glanced down at you with his wide smile and then grabbed at the hand of the older woman in front of you. “It’s an honour to be able to have you and your husband attend our dinner tonight.”

“When will you make the announcement?” she asked and you looked at her with a hint of confusion. She laughed and placed a hand over top of Minhyun’s. “Oh we all know she cannot be glowing simply because!”

“Actually I can be,” you blurted out, stunned at her assumption. “Make up artists are extremely talented.”

Minhyun and the woman stared at you for a moment and you continued to smile, whilst inside you raged. You were unsure why it affected you so much, when your marriage hadn’t even been your choice. All the same, the insinuation of you being pregnant made you extremely frustrated; you hadn’t so much as kissed your husband yet.

Senator Blight clapped her hands together in a forced laugh and Minhyun awkwardly chuckled with her. “You are too funny, Princess. I cannot wait until you announce it though, until then I will make sure not to say anything funny.”

“To announce anything, wouldn’t-”

A hand covered your mouth then, Minhyun laughing loudly. “She’s nervous.”

“Oh but of course, I’ll see you inside then.”

Once she was gone, you wrestled out of his grip, glaring up at him. “What? I was telling the truth!”

“You have to remember your place here, Y/N,” he warned, his eyes darting around you at all the guests. “Rumours are easily started.”

“It isn’t a rumour if it’s a fact. We have no reason at all for me to be suggested as glowing. Surely she knows what highlighter is, she was wearing enough of it herself!”

He regarded you for a moment, his eyes dark and searching yours. “We can discuss this later.”

“We can actually talk to one another? More than goodnight?” you shot back, and Minhyun’s mouth dropped at your statement. You smiled up at him, albeit with some tension. “Do you actually have words you would even say to me?”

“Not now, Y/N.” He almost growled and you bit your lip, blinking a couple of times. Had you pushed him too hard? He however had no respect for how it made you feel to be in this situation. You pressed on.

“Why not now? Ah, because we’re here to act together, right?”

His eyes were becoming as sharp as daggers.

“Your Highness, Princess, the dinner is now ready to be served.”

Neither of you looked away from each other at the butler’s announcement, and for a moment you could see Minhyun wrestling with something you had never seen reside in his umber eyes.

And then he turned to the man waiting on you, smiling graciously. “Thank you, shall we?”

His elbow was hooked out for you to grasp onto and you sighed inwardly, slipping your hands around the arm and followed him into the dinner with your smile placed upon your face.

However as the meal progressed, you could tell the tension was still simmering between you both. Minhyun’s attention was on you more than usual, and you wondered if he was monitoring your behaviour. Many times throughout the meal, you had found him staring at you, unwavering. It made you feel anxious, and also a little encouraged to continue frustrating him. You were finally seeing more reaction out of him than you had known so far into your marriage. Even if you were uncomfortable, it was worth it. The distance was becoming too much for you.

“Y/N?” You blinked rapidly, only realising you had been ignoring the older man beside you. As you turned to look at him, you noticed the sly smile briefly cross Minhyun’s lips over the table from you. It threw you off. “Are you feeling alright?”

“Yes,” you managed, smiling at him and he took your hand gently. You clasped your hands over his. “What were you saying?”

“I asked you what you like about your husband the most,” he mentioned, his deep seated eyes piercing yours. “None of the generic stuff either that I’ve read in your interviews, something real.”

You were stumped; there was nothing you had yet to like about him. Glancing over at the boy, you were surprised to see him gazing back at you, his head tilted to the side ever so slightly, an expectant expression settled on his face. Narrowing your own eyes and scrunching your face up for a fleeting second, you then returned to your conversation.

“What do you think I should like about him?”

He chuckled. “I’m asking for your opinion. Do you like him so much you don’t know where to begin?”

“Uncle, I believe she might not like me at all, fancy that.”

Minhyun’s eyes were now challenging you, his sweet smile sickening you. Smiling back at his relative, you nodded. “There’s very little to like.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes. But he does have one attribute I can attest for.”

“Which is?”

You sighed, remembering the many occasions you had felt jealousy rear of late. “He treats those who work for and with him with the utmost regard. He listens to their concerns, wisdom and joy and treats them all as people he treasures greatly. It’s admirable.”

Minhyun’s smile faded as the older man chortled. “That’s right; he’s a very soft person at heart. You have paid attention to him well. I’m relieved. I was worried there would be no love between you both since neither of you appeared to want this marriage initially.”

You were acutely aware of the eyes fixated on you, but you chose to avoid them, swallowing roughly and then smiling at the old man again. “Time will tell.”

“Dear Princess,” the man then pulled you closer, words only for you to hear. “He’s a hard person to grow accustomed to, I know. But trust in this, he is very much so interested in you.”

He moved back then with a knowing smile, and you shook your head immediately. “I believe you’re wrong.”

You were pulled closer again and the words he uttered this time shocked you to the core. “It wasn’t the King who chose you but Minhyun. He was adamant it had to be you.”

The party was over and your head hurt, the constant buzzing of thoughts since gaining knowledge from Minhyun’s Uncle giving you a headache. You barely were aware of climbing into the car to go back to the manor, hands fumbling over you to place your seat belt on. You only realised this after the fact and suddenly pressed yourself into the leather upholstery, eyes wide with shock.

“What has made you like this?” Minhyun asked quietly as he started the car up, and you merely stared out your window.

Why had he chosen you? It wasn’t as if he knew you well enough to be so certain you were the right pick. Thinking on the four other girls you knew that had potential to be in your spot, all were more beautiful, successful and powerful.

Had he chosen you because you were the plainest of the bunch? Or more importantly, because you wouldn’t be someone to threaten the balance of control within your household? You were known to be pleasing to all around you, your inner thoughts being held in; even if you disagreed, you were trained to be compliant. Except for tonight, you had never challenged anything in public before. Your hands clenched up as you realised how quickly you had become a choice because of living trapped as a marionette doll, and now Minhyun held your strings.

“Stop the car.”

“What?” Minhyun glanced over at you and then back at the gravel track. “We’re almost there.”

“I don’t care, stop it.” He obliged, and as soon as it was stationary, you threw the belt off of you, ripping the door open and taking off into the field adjacent to the car. Stopping momentarily, you removed your heels and threw them, allowing your sore feet to embrace the soft grass as you ran as fast as you could take yourself.

You heard movement rushing after you, and it only angered you more, coming to a complete stop and turning to face Minhyun, the taller boy rocking back on his heels to prevent crashing into you. He panted once and ran a hand through his dark hair. “What on earth was that?!”

“Why did you have to choose me?!” Your hands were balled at your sides and your chest rose and fell with the exertion of running and your emotions. “Why did you have to ruin my life?!”

His eyes were wide, and for the first time since you’d met him, he looked crestfallen by your accusation. You glared at him, searching for a reason for this situation. Finally he seemed to be able to breathe again. “I ruined your life?”

“I never wanted to marry you, not once!” Heaving in a deep breath, you pointed at his chest, Minhyun flinching at your touch. “But since I did, I thought I would make the best of it. Surely we could at least find companionship in time. Instead you barely acknowledge my existence. I’m sick of playing the role of the perfect Princess and wife. I’m done!”

You spun around and stalked off again, the moon lighting your path through the grass. He stopped you though, moving so fast in front of you that you almost tripped over and fell onto him. Minhyun held you up, but you snapped away from his grip, shaking your head. “Don’t touch me!”

“Should I have let you fall then?”

“Maybe! Then we’d be on the right playing field with each other. You don’t care about this relationship at all!”

“And you do?” he challenged, his mood darkening like it had earlier. He was exasperated, shaking his hand in your direction. “Have you ever once thought of what I wanted?”

“No!”

“Exactly.” He scoffed loudly, and you bit your lip. “Don’t point the fing-”

“Because you’ve not given me a single chance to even know what you want, Your Highness.”

“Don’t speak to me like that,” he growled, stepping closer. “Don’t place me higher than you.”

“Aren’t you though? Didn’t you pick me because I would be the person to keep out of your affairs? The type of wife who was well trained for this role, and would just comply with all my marital duties, with no opposition?”

He laughed bitterly. “Is this what you call no opposition?!”

“No, this is the real me. The one who is screaming at you to regard me as… as-”

“As what?” he asked, moving even closer to you. The intimate proximity and your heightened emotions were playing tricks on your mind, and you watched as he pursed his lips together, his eyes glued to yours. “What do you want to be to me?”

“Nothing.”

“Liar.” He covered the remaining space between you, his shallow breathing hitting your face as you looked up at him. “Tell the truth, you were so ready to at dinner.”

“Why did you pick me, Minhyun?”

He stared at you for what felt like an eternal moment, and then a quick smile crossed his lips. “Because I like you.”

His words knocked the breath out of you, but your brow furrowed, and you came back to your senses. “Don’t lie, yourself. If you liked me, wouldn’t you pay more attention to me?”

“All I do is pay attention to you, Y/N. You just don’t seem to recognise it at all.”

“We barely speak!” You shook your head, not believing anything he was saying. His features had softened though, embarrassment evident in his eyes. “How would you like someone you don’t even know?”

“I related to you,” he said, gently shifting a tendril of your hair away from your face. You were surprised, you hadn’t even realised your hair had been there. “The others all knew what they wanted, why they were pursuing me with advances that I didn’t ask for. You simply completed what was asked of you, respecting the others and my family. You appeared sincere, but really, you looked frustrated, wanting nothing more than to break free.”

You nodded slowly, he had been more observant that you expected.

“My whole life, I never wanted anything that I’ve done. Do I look like I even would enjoy tennis? Yet, I trained to the point that I hated that court more than anything else. Why? Because it was expected of me.”

“Because your parents wanted you to,” you surmised and he nodded.

“My parents didn’t want to choose you,” he admitted and he smiled, taking off his blazer and then sitting down. He laid the garment out beside him and looked up at you and then at the jacket. For some reason you accepted his offer, thankful for getting off your sore feet. You glanced down at them and realised how painful they looked.

“Why did you then?”

Minhyun’s smile grew. “Because I thought if I chose you, we could be free.”

“This is your definition of free?” you reproached, shaking your head.

“Our parents will always expect things of us. But between us, couldn’t we expect nothing like that? You could do whatever you want to. I’ll support it.”

“Why would you do that for me?”

“Because I like you,” he repeated, looking ahead. “Because I understood your cry for help back then. If you didn’t marry me, wouldn’t you be auctioned off to the next family in line? Like me, you never had a choice to marry for love in your cards, right?”

“Mm.” You sighed, pulling your legs up around yourself and resting your head on your knees. You were growing tired now that the anger was seeping out of you. “Why didn’t you just talk to me, get to know me, spend more time with me, if you liked me though?”

Minhyun didn’t answer right away, and you glanced over at him then, his eyes staring off into the distance. He took a deep breath and then turned to look at you. “Because I liked you too much.”

“That makes no sense,” you laughed but he grew thoughtful.

“I didn’t want to say anything that would make you uncomfortable, or make you angry with your situation anymore than you had been. And I was worried, always.”

“Why?”

“That I wouldn’t be enough for you. That you would end up hating me because you never chose me.”

Your eyes fell down to your knees, shocked by his vulnerability. And then you looked at his own lap, his hand clenching and then loosening off against his pants. You reached over without much thought, slipping your fingers inside his palm and holding his hand, feeling it settle against yours. Looking up, you were surprised by how close his face now appeared, and took a shaky breath. It was enough for the prince to lean over and kiss you gently, hesitantly.

Emotion came from someplace you never knew existed within you, and you closed your eyes, kissing him back. Your free hands both moved to each other, yours to his neck, slipping around to support yourself on him, and Minhyun’s to your waist, drawing you in closer as your embrace deepened. An urgency between you grew, and soon you were both breathless, your lips separating only for a deep breath before you let go of his hand, slinging your other arm around his neck, Minhyun gently laying you down beside him, your kiss not breaking at all.

And then he finally pulled away, your eyes attached to his now swollen lips. He glanced around you both and laughed. “Imagine if we were caught out here like this. How impractical of us.”

“You just kissed me like that, and then that’s all you can think to say?” you asked, your arms untangling from around his neck. He stopped you from moving away and you looked up at him.

“I didn’t say it because I didn’t like it.”

“Then why did you stop?” You reached to touch his face tenderly. “I’m worried that when the sun rises tomorrow, you’ll be back to your old self.”

He shook his head, turning to kiss your hand gently. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this.”

“So why did you stop?” you repeated, and he scooped you back in his arms, feeling like a completely different person. Minhyun wasn’t cold at all like you knew him to be; in fact his warmth was the only thing keeping you from shivering in your slip dress.

“I left the car running,” he admitted sheepishly, and you both laughed, getting up to your feet.

“Couldn’t you just let the battery die?”

He leaned down to place a chaste kiss on your lips and then smiled. “Let’s go home. Let’s do all the things we’ve wanted to all this time.”

“I’m sure it’s past ten now,” you teased and nudged him playfully. “Isn’t that when you need to retreat to your bedroom?”

“What do you think of making it our bedroom?” he asked, his eyes diverting away from yours after a quick glance to see your reaction. He cleared his throat awkwardly. “Only if you want to that is, after all I did ruin your life, as you said.”

“You did,” you agreed readily and the taller boy snapped his eyes back to yours. You smirked. “But I think you might have a way of making my life better now too.”

You stretched up to kiss him briefly again before running off, Minhyun chasing you all the way back to the car. As he sped down the drive and you both jumped out of the car, you laughed earnestly, feeling like the field had been a place where you both left your burdens behind. You hadn’t felt this free before.

Opening the door to the manor, the mood changed again, Minhyun’s hand slipping into yours and leading you up the staircase, his eyes constantly soaking you in. He then let your hand go, moving over to his bedroom door and opening it. Standing there, he tilted his head to the side and waited.

It didn’t take you long to rush towards him, your lips entangled in each other as you moved over the threshold and into your new relationship with your husband.

Minhyun hadn’t ruined your life after all. He had opened a new world for you instead.

And you couldn’t wait to experience all of it with him.

_________________

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[lifeasabashly]

Berwick

So I’ve been applying for this camp, through work for the last four years or so, and this year, after almost deciding that I didn’t need it anymore, I got picked to go. It is based in the Berwick Forest, 40km out of Dunedin in May which usually would sound like a whole lot of miserable to me (as I am a sad sack throughout most of Winter) but for some reason I was keen to go. 

Arriving at an empty airport in Dunedin and realising I had been left behind was a shit start that really made me question if I had made the right choice. But that was the last time I had that thought. I got picked up by one of the Lions Club members eventually and dropped at the camp where everyone was already sitting in their ‘watches’ with their GP lines and beanies. I was in Green watch which suited me fab, my fav colour. I immediately was thrown into the team building exercise where we were writing a story about a hole in a balloon. It’s interesting thinking back now to those people I met, and how those relationships changed and grew over the 8 days I was there. 

My watch was made up of Moe (said Moy) (60s), Mark (60s), Julie (50s), Myself (26), Max (24), Erin (21), Kohan (19), William (18), Mikayla (18) & Harry (18). Such a range of people from all walks of life. 

I’d miss the orientation session, along with Charlie and Morgan from Trustpower so we briefly sat down and went through this before heading to our bunks. Being last meant I got a top bunk - which I was fine with as it meant I was closer to the warmth (and farts I guess). 

We woke EARLY the next morning, about 5.40am to bagpipes blasting outside our room. I freaking love bagpipes so this actually put me in such a good mood. We got dressed and headed to our first activity which was like a brain teaser type activity in the common room. It was far too early for me to be able to contribute anything useful  and I’m pretty shit at these types of things anyway so was happy to let the team lead us to success! Finally at 7 we got breakfast, typical camp style lining up for cereals, toasts, porridge the works. I went hard out of fear of not eating again for a long time and a huge day ahead. Before I knew it we were kitted up in our wetsuits heading to our first big activity - Kayaking. Now I’m not really for or against Kayaking. Can be fun, sometimes it’s just boring so I was keen to see what they had planned. We started in a pool, the tiny, local community pool that used to be used by a school that was now shut down. The water was ice. I wore my socks in. They made us do flips in the kayaks and taught us how to safely exit if we did flip on the river. 

Then we were in the river. I had chosen my paddle and kayak that I felt would suit me best, plus they were perfectly colour coordinated so thought I was away for the win. We had barely disembarked before one of our watch Will, had fallen out of his kayak. He was complaining it was too small and hard to maneuver. Me being the good Samaritan *coughs* offered him mine. This was my first mistake and lesson learnt. Never be nice. His kayak was tiny, it took me 3 goes to get in the damn thing without falling out. I was wearing my sneakers (as the river was colder than the pool) and I was incredibly cramped and uncomfortable the whole river journey. To my dismay when I fell out on a turn, I was trapped by my sneaker and spent a good 3 minutes flailing about until Will caught up and was able to help me out. Overall it was still fun though. When I had to get out of the kayak at one point to - kiss the front (the things these instructors made you do) I bruised both legs and by the end of the float (due to falling out so much) I was a freezing, shivering mess. But I DID IT. I think they were worried about hypothermia though as they sent me straight to the van where the heater was blasting. 

We headed back to lunch which was sandwiches and hot pies. God I love a good pie. So delightful. Then we had tea prep so I spent the next hour peeling & chopping carrots with Mikayla. 

Straight into Knots & the Confidence course after lunch. I gotta say, I am possibly the worst knot tier in the history of the planet. I had to be shown about 300 times before it stuck and then the next day I still couldn’t tell you what the damn knots were called. Lucky I had a watch full of able humans who had done guides and were just onto it to help me through the rest of the week where knots were ESSENTIAL to survival! The confidence course was fun. The very first part was a tyre wall which I felt very prepared for after spending Intermediate sitting on the tyre wall at lunch times. I must admit, once I was at the top I was still abit shaky/nervous going over the top. Even more so when we had to carry a bucket full of water over too! Erin struggled with this one, she just would not budge at one point, saying her arms/legs were giving up, bawling her eyes out and Leanne (one of our instructors) would not let her give up. She made it over and I’m glad, but I definitely had a moment of - this feels like bullying. It just shows you though, some people need it. The rest of the course was pretty tame, tarzan ropes onto walls, that sort of jam. It wasn’t until the last bit - a firemans pole that I got a bit nervous again. I don’t know what it is about them but they freak me out. This one was exceptionally high too! Leanne was there giving me technique and before I knew it I was at the bottom. Embarrassed at how easy it was! Unfortunately Moe, was close on my tail and did it straight after me without any technique and sped to the bottom where she snapped her ankle in three places. I got to do First Aid, but poor Moe was gutted. Her ankle did the floppy thing like Harry’s arm in Harry Potter. It was pretty gross but intriguing. She was in no pain! Just shock I guess. Ironically that night after dinner, we had our First Aid training. I was in bed by 9 and asleep by 9.01 for sure. Absolutely shattered.

Day two! We had games first thing from 6am-7am. Again, puzzles in the morning, not my forte. Esp not before kai. After breakfast we had toilet duties which is always a barrel of laughs right? Then on to abseiling. This was based at camp. The hill to the top was a bit of a bitch to get to but abseiling was fun! We did it three times, the third time blind folded. Beef was our instructor. He was a spunk. After lunch we were back on to knots and bush craft which I don’t overly remember doing but again I think this is because I was hopeless at it and all the knots seemed the same to me. Looking at the schedule it’s hard to believe that this took up most of the afternoon. I remember we had to pull a pole somewhere and tow a truck though. Then Dinner, then night exercise. This one was us carrying a massive heavy pole from one side of the camp to the other as a team. It wasn’t awesome. The walk back under the stars was lovely though.

Monday was our first sports session - Netball. I loved it. It made me think how some days I would just play netball and that’s all the exercise I would do.... this was just the first thing for the day! Our team lost, JUST. But our commitment and passion was 10/10! Next was mountain biking which I was super excited for but MAN it was hard. We got kitted up with bikes/helmets and then did some practice stuff on the icy grass/mud. We then headed up the hill. I could bike up all of 2 minutes as it was steep AF. Everyone had to get off and walk most of it. We learnt how to jump logs and break/maneuver down steep hills. I came off the bike twice, one time landing on another stationary bike but it was so awesome! Then we got to boost down the hill. It was SO fast. I felt alive. I loved it. 100% Mountain biker for life.

After lunch we were back into it with a ‘Bridge Exercise’ - they gave us tiny hints to what we were doing throughout the course - but they never really helped. This was intense. When we realized what we had to do, get from one side of the bridge, underneath it and come up on the other side - there was a lot of planning involved. And actually doing it, (and trusting your teams knots) was pretty crazy! We aren’t allowed to share photos of this and I didn’t get any, any way but this was such a cool challenge. After dinner our night exercise this night was hilarious. We were all blindfolded and either had to lead or direct our watch around camp. It was pretty freaky putting your trust in strangers this way, especially at night. I DID end up in a swamp. But it was so fun. Making the most of our other senses and what not. Pretty cool. And just when we thought we were finally done for the night, blindfolds off. I hear this blood-curdling scream and Leanne comes racing up to us in full diva/drunk actor mode yelling about how she pushed her brother ‘Eric’ off a cliff and he’s dying at the bottom. So off we trot following her to save Eric. I got the fun task of taking care of drunk Leanne who was going on about popping cherries, working her ‘night job’ and the likes. Much to Harry’s disgust as Leanne is his mums best friend. So entertaining. Finally with Eric stretchered back to camp and bandaged we were allowed to go to bed. 

Tuesday Tramp Day! This was what I was most nervous about, a 15km tramp through the wilderness. Seemed like not far but boy was it ever. It took us 12 hours. We went the wrong way twice and not just a few steps like probably 2-3kms each time. No instructors, reception, just a map (that wasn’t the best if I may add!) The majority of the tramp was up hill and it was hard. Erin couldn’t hack it. She got blisters day one and the whole tramp (before she got taken out) she was moaning about them and stopping every 20 steps. It meant we moved incredibly slow - I didn’t really get a chance to get tired. She was though. I felt sad for her because everyone was tired/sore in some way and she couldn’t just push herself. Anyway, she got taken out with Max, who was borderline collapsing at every turn and then we could pick up the pace. By 7.30pm it was dark, cold and we were so over it. By 8.30 we were finally at The Hilton, exhausted and starving. I ate mince boiled with instant mash potato and peas. It looked like spew but I devoured it. Then I went to bed, it’s possibly one of the worst huts I’ve stayed in. Made New Beers look like a resort. But I slept solidly. 

Wednesday we were up early to make our way to the Mahinerangi Dam. Damn son. It was huge. We had lunch first - chicken AND ham luncheon sandwiches - just bread and butter no shit, dried apricots and a cup-a-soup. Gourmet I tell you. We set up our tents, wet and dirty from the previous 2 watches and then got set up for our dam abseil. First one, no biggy, no dramas for me. Second one... I’m not quite sure what happened but I was afraid. I didn’t realise I wasn’t going to be able to use my feet and would just have to lower myself down. I think the shock of that suddenly happening just set me off and I burst into tears. Sobbed the whole dam way down. Need any more damn puns? Damn. Others didn’t do the second one, but Harry and Max went all profesh on us, bouncing off the walls like Spiderman. Show offs.

After the dam activities, we were off for another wetties exercise. Raft building. Each team member had to sail out to the island and back without getting our lines wet or drownies. It was actually a really easy task and we finished it so early we had heaps of free time. FREE TIME!? At Berwick? NEVER. I went and set up my tent, I got nominated to tent with the boys as we only had 3 person tents plus we wanted to avoid the snorers (Mark, Will, Max, Erin...) Kohan, in my tent didn’t bring a bed roll, so Harry and I ended up putting our two together and sharing. We played some president which I was excellent at for once. We had some snacks, then went and made dinner. Pasta packets - Mac & Cheese. This was actually pretty tasty. I ate heaps! After dinner we had another activity. Learning to use a GPS. They are super legit - who knew!? And Geo-caching is a thing. I’m 26 and I’d never heard of this, but people leave notes for other people around the world to find. It’s like a world-wide treasure hunt! So cool! Thankfully we got to have an early night and headed back to the tent. I slept in full gear - beanie, puffer jacket, merinos, socks - the works and was still shivering. I’m actually so glad there was no way of knowing how cold it was that night but there was ice on our tent in the morning. 

Thursday was another 4 hour tramp back to camp. We got lost... again and were late getting back. We went straight into lunch then an Initiative course. This was probably the best ever. Or maybe it was just I remember it so well as it was near the end of the week. It was loads of team-based activities that weren’t physically demanding but just hilarious and you had to use your brain and trust your homies to succeed. I got heaved over walls, thrown through ‘spider webs’, held my fingers against holes in a giant drum while the team filled it with water #frozenfingers. I had to sit on Harrys shoudlers  so we could all fit onto this platform after swinging across a mudpit. We then had to dive into another mudpit/lake, do a massive flying fox, ropes again and more. Dinner, then more sport afterwards. Cricket, which would have been amazing except it was inside and you couldn’t smash it so I got out pretty quickly. Had a few successful bowls however. 

Friday morning we had more sport - football (lame but fun for others) then breakfast and cleaning. Everyone was back from the tramps Friday and we were on dinner so had to prepare a shit tonne for the ‘’roast meal’ (8 Roast Beefs!). It was a huge job. Then we were off for our ‘river exercise’ which we were told - all being well you shouldn’t get wet. I have to admit by this point, I had very little clothing left and reaaaallly didn’t want to get wet if I could avoid it. So when our first team mate came across the river and dropped to the side, a sodden mess- I was hugely disappointed. I think this was the only task we actually had to ask an instructor for help. We had to be split into two groups on each side of the river and using our ropes (not getting them wet) we had to get each team member to the other side of the river and back. Thankfully, by the time I had to go across, not only was I being pulled back and forth #noeffortrequired but I did not touch the river with any part of my body! Great success! Harry got dunked which was sad for him but hilarious for everyone else. Back to camp for a quick lunch then we had another group activity (bridge building) and then orienteering. Both were fun, but orienteering took us ages! Makayla, Harry and I were in a team and these two just spent the time waffling. I had to be mother hen quite frequently to keep them on the job at hand! We played some truth or dare which was great on my part because I am an excellent question master and kept orienteering fun, but it was cool because you got to explore the whole camp. I saw a baby wild pig! And there was probably 3 times total I said over the course - surely they wouldn’t make us go up/down/through there.... alas, it was the right way. When we finally got back, Kev the instructor was on his way out to us to check we weren’t dead. Dinner was a bit emotional as it was our last night... then we had to go do our performance ‘Welcome to Berwick’. It was in the tune to ‘My House’ by Flo Rida and our watches show was definitely the best. We even had backing music... just saying. After that we all headed back to the rooms to spend time together before lights off as I knew I had an earlier flight Sat morning and wouldn’t get to do the last relay or wind down drinks/BBQ. Harry was quite distraught. He was crying and saying he didn’t want to leave and that Makayla and I were his best friends and I was just amazing. It was all quite overwhelming for me. I loved these two, so easily and quickly in this weird environment we’d been thrust in - but I guess for me I had a lot of friends, Chris and life to go back to and neither of them didn’t have quite that. So I will try be good friends to them both, because I think they need that. I know they’re gonna do great things. It’s exciting to watch.

Saturday morning was spent cleaning, trying to find all my shit and then a few tears saying goodbyes (even from me! Shock Horror!) Kev drove me away in the van and it was hard leaving. I really could have stayed there another week or more I think. I just loved it.The truth is I really didn’t miss home that much, I was too tired or busy... I didn’t think I had missed Chris even until I saw him and burst into tears. Now being back, it’s hard to explain how life-changing and inspirational it was. I feel like a dick talking to people about it and saying that that’s exactly what it was for me but people don’t really get it unless they’ve been. I LOVED not using my phone or having it anywhere near me, I LOVED the people I met and stories we shared, I LOVED being outside, being dirty and being completely me without anyone's expectations. I loved learning all these new skills and really pushing myself and then finding out how awesome I could be!

Finally, I must admit though, I LOVED coming home to an ice cold bourbon with Chris too. #OGhobby

[general-du-vallon]

So aaages ago @canadiangarrison sent me a prompt from one of the many lists I reblooped i think it might even have been on a previous incarnation of this tumblr, I can’t find the list or anything but the prompt was ‘you’ll have to limp faster than that’ and here is a fill. I got a bunch of this stuff from Leverage which is a great TV show. 

“You’re going to have to limp faster than that,” Athos warns, watching Porthos on the video screens from the security office. The security guards are on the floor with duct tape over their mouths and around their wrists, Constance’s heel in one of their back’s, d’Artagnan sat on the other checking weapons and passing them up to Aramis.

Porthos gives the camera the finger but takes hold of Samara’s shoulder, keeping just in front of her still but using her to steady himself so they can move faster. Porthos’s breathing is a desperate rasp in their earpieces. Athos, keeping an eye on where the rest of the building security is, winces as a door opens and Balthazar comes striding out, wiping blood off his hands. Alaman.

“Bugger,” Aramis says, leaning over Athos’s shoulder. “You want me to …?”

Athos shakes his head. They get Samara to safety and then they go in. Alaman’s only here to distract, he’s playing his part. Athos holds onto that, hoping he’s right. He does not want to have to tell Treville that they accidentally got his partner killed. Or tortured.

“Porthos, Balthazar is on the move,” Athos says. “Corridor on the second floor, heading for the stairs.”

Porthos doesn’t answer but he pushes Samara in front of him, shoving until she breaks into a run, leaving him limping at her back. They’re close, just a bit further. Porthos is between Balthazar’s position and Samara. Athos pretends not to care a bit about that but still sighs in relief as Balthazar goes up to the next floor and into a bathroom. The security on the second floor is still pretty static and on the first floor they’re out the front having a smoke.

“I’ve got Samara,” Sylvie says into the ear piece. “Porthos?”

“Go,” Athos says.

Sylvie pauses and Porthos looks up at the camera and nods. Athos repeats his instruction more firmly and Sylvie, a moment later, confirms that she and Samara are away and heading for Constance’s house. Constance’s giant empty house in the middle of nowhere that no one knew she had until they needed a safe house. A proper safe house that had no connection to any of them and that Rochefort won’t find. Athos turns his attention back to Porthos.

“Aramis, get Alaman,” Athos says.

Aramis nods, secreting a last few weapons about himself, and heads out with Constance. She’ll do distraction, exits, and will watch his back. Not that Aramis usually lets anything through. He’s the best hitter Athos has worked with in ten years pulling cons .This time it’s not much or a con, more tidying up a mess. Where Rochefort dug Balthazar up Athos can’t begin to imagine, they’ll have to find that out later, but letting one of Alaman’s enemies know where to find his daughter was certainly effective. Now Treville’s keeping Rochefort distracted while they do this quick and dirty extraction. Athos watches Aramis pass Porthos, touching his shoulder and taking a brief moment to check him before heading stealthily up the stairs, Constance at his back.

“We’ve got four minutes before the door alarms come back on,” d’Artagnan says. “Ten before the internal sensors are back.”

“Let’s move out,” Athos says, gathering his things and setting the room to rights. They take the security guards with them. Athos takes a last look at Porthos, moving slowly now with his hand against the wall. Athos can’t help clocking that Porthos has gloves on and isn’t leaving fingerprints, that he’s not leaking blood or other DNA either. It’s habit to check they’re not leaving traces of themselves. He leaves the small room, following d’Artagnan, letting the door snk behind him and lock. “Limp faster.”

Porthos huffs a laugh but he must speed up because when they reach the hallway, to Athos’s relief, Porthos has made it and is coming up on them. There’s a yell from upstairs. Athos shifts the guard he’s dragging and offers Porthos his shoulders, wincing as Porthos’s weight settles, big arm around Athos, sweat and desperation, pained gasps.

“Two minutes,” d’Artagnan says.

They go out the side door, half-running, half-dragging Porthos and the guards. They make it - as the door closes the alarm light blinks back on.

“Perimeter?” Porthos asks.

“Um, two minutes,” d’Artagnan says.

“Van,” Porthos says. Then he closes his eyes and presses against Athos. “And slower.”

d’Artagnan takes the other side and he and Athos make good time dragging Porthos and the guards, ignoring Porthos’s soft grunts and curses and demands they slow down. The guards they duct tape to the legs of the counter in there, all Porthos’s tech set up, the counter built in like a desk. Porthos they lower carefully into the seat, Athos giving Porthos’s neck a comforting and encouraging squeeze: they still need him. He pulls the mouse and keyboards to him and starts pressing buttons, waking things up, screens scrolling through information. He blinks sweat out of his eyes and Athos gets him a bunch of tissues.

“Athos, can we leave?” Aramis asks, breathless.

“Hang on,” Porthos growls.

“What Porthos said,” Athos says. “Any info?”

“Window with the balcony,” Constance says.

d’Artagnan climbs through to the front and starts the engine. Athos leans by Porthos and watches his fingers move, more sluggish than usual but still fast as lightning, across the keyboards, playing with strings of numbers and code, pulling the security system apart. A three-dimensional floor-plan of the house comes up on the screen and Porthos clicks, highlighting a window, typing… the window frame goes green.

“Now,” Porthos says. “Quick. Let me know when you’re out.”

There’s rough breathing, Alaman curses in Spanish echoed by Aramis, a thump, and Constance laughing. Then she confirms they’re out and Athos goes to open the back. Porthos is still working, trying to extend their window so they can leave the grounds without setting off alarms. Athos spots three figures running towards them and calls softly to d’Artagnan. They’re already moving when Constance arrives, leaping on board, Alaman and then Aramis on her heels.

“Ok,” Porthos says. “Go.”

Athos yanks the doors shut as d’Artagnan accelerates. Porthos is pulling information around his screens again, hanging onto the desk as d’Artagnan drives a bit erratically toward the front. They hit the road too fast and there’s a squeal of the tyres and a bang as they hit a pothole. It won’t take long for Alaman to be noticed missing, or the guards, or Samara. Athos grins a little thinking about the amount they’ve just taken from Balthazar. Athos checks Alaman over quickly (just a split lip and some bruises) before kneeling by Aramis and helping him pull Porthos out of the seat and onto the floor of the van.

“How is he?” Constance asks, also coming over.

“I’ll live,” Porthos says. “Oww! Aramis!”

“Shut up,” Aramis says, yanking off the half-hearted bandage Porthos managed, dried blood pulling at skin and the wound. Aramis winces and touches the swollen mark gently, sucking air between his teeth. “Ouch.”

“Yeah, ouch!” Porthos yells, shoving Aramis away, sitting up and pressing a hand above his wound.

“Stop pissing about,” Aramis says, pushing Porthos.

Athos is used to their tussle over Porthos’s injuries so he ignores it, taking the hand Porthos isn’t using to whack at Aramis and sitting quietly, waiting for Porthos to give in. He does eventually, subsiding and turning his head to watch Athos, eyes heavy with pain and blood-loss.

“Sorry we didn’t get you sooner,” Athos says.

“No worries,” Porthos says. “Thanks for the earpiece and the phone. Could’ve done more with that security if you’d given me a better phone than Constance’s. Next time get me Treville’s..”

“Hey,” Constance says. “Where is it, anyway?”

“The phone?” Porthos says.

“Yes, my phone,” Constance says. Porthos hums. “No. No no no! You fucker, this is the third of my phones you’ve lost!”

“I didn’t lose it,” Porthos says, smiling. “Just left it somewhere for Balthazar to find. Samara and I left him a little gift.”

“What did you do?” Aramis asks. “This is infected. I’m going to clean it. Don’t scream.”

Porthos screams.

“Is Samara ok?” Alaman asks.

“She seemed fine,” Athos says. “No injuries, quite well. Sylvie took her.”

“Good,” Alaman says. “And Treville?”

“Hasn’t checked in,” Athos says.

“Just left him a reminder not to come back,” Porthos says, breath coming fast. Athos realises he means Balthazar, the gift he left, and smooths that hair away from his face, wiping away sweat and grime with his t-shirt. “Left him a little folder of what we now know about him and some reminders about British laws he’s broken.”

“Good,” Alaman says. “He won’t be back then: he likes to be under the radar.”

Porthos nods, closing his eyes. Aramis gives him a poke to keep him awake, head bent over Porthos’s thigh. He looks up at Athos but Athos shakes his head so Constance helps instead, helps get Porthos’s trousers the rest of the way off, preps a needle and thread, helps Aramis check for damage. Aramis puts a single stitch in and bandages Porthos clean and tight.

“Bullet’s still in there?” Porthos asks, muzzy.

“Yep,” Aramis says. “I’ll remove it when we’re not rocketing about like mad.”

“When d’Artagnan’s not driving, then,” Porthos says.

d’Artagnan laughs wildly from the front seat and drives a little more smoothly. For three seconds. Constance climbs through to ride in the front with him. Athos stays quiet, holding Porthos’s hand and stroking his cheek, cleaning away sweat now and then. Aramis puts a blanket over Porthos then sits with Alaman. All of them are tense, waiting to hear from Treville. Rochefort was at an event so Treville had got an invite from Anne, drinking cocktails and schmoozing with Louis de Bourbon’s rich and powerful network of friends and business people. All Treville had to do was keep Rochefort there and keep him from checking in with Balthazar. Athos has sent the text with the all clear so they should have heard.

“You think he’s ok?” Porthos murmurs, holding Athos’s knee at the moment while Athos needs both hands to get the blood off from Porthos’s hairline where he got hit.

“He’s fine,” Athos says, as casually and certain as he can be.

“He is indeed,” Treville’s voice comes, finally, over their earpieces, all of them keeping theirs in to hear. Athos breathes out, relieved. “Sorry, Louis wanted to swim. I persuaded him Rochefort was perfect for that and we’ve been out in the lake ever since. Rochefort was mostly naked with no phone or electronic communications but so was I. It was all a Louis thing so he doesn’t even suspect me.”

“Perfect,” Athos says.

“He will when he hears from Balthazar,” Alaman says.

“Tariq,” Treville says, sounding relieved in his turn. “Oh, thank god. Samara?”

“Away and safe,” Alaman says.

“Thank god. We are moving to France,” Treville says.

“Morocco, we can stay with Samara then,” Alaman says.

“You can negotiate where you run away and retire to late,” Porthos breathes. “Are we rendezvousing somewhere?”

“No,” Athos says.

They drop d’Artagnan at the police station with the two guards to do his thing and pretend that he doesn’t associate with a highly illegal group of criminals and to process them like he’s arrested them in a normal manner. They might give him something that he can legally use to at least start digging into Balthazar who so far, as an ambassador, has been untouchable even though he’s not very legal. Then they drop Aramis off at their offices to do clear up and make sure they’ve not left signs anywhere. Then Athos drive Alaman to the safe house and dump the van, leaving Constance to provide security,  transferring Porthos to Athos’s car. Finally he, Sylvie and Porthos head home, Sylvie and Athos half-carrying a sleepy, exhausted Porthos to his bedroom.

“I’ll get painkillers,” Sylvie says. “Are you sleeping with him?”

“Nooo, it hurts,” Porthos whines, smushed into his pillows.

“Yeah,” Athos says. “He’ll only complain if I don’t, even if it does hurt.”

“I’m not complaining,” Sylvie says, kissing Athos’s forehead. He tips his head so she gets his lips and she laughs. “Sneaky. Ok, painkillers and water.”

“Food,” Porthos suggests, hopefully.

Sylvie brings him a sandwich as well but he doesn’t eat it. Athos does, him and Sylvie sitting on the bed and talking quietly while the painkiller kicks in. When it does Sylvie leaves and Athos strips before helping Porthos out of what clothes he’s still wearing. Athos puts a pillow under Porthos’s thigh and then curls against him, kissing his shoulder and neck and cheek. Porthos turns his head so Athos can kiss him properly, warmth curling between them then settling quietly.

“Thanks for getting me,” Porthos whispers.

“I’m glad you’re ok,” Athos whispers back, able to relax and admit it now. “I was worried. I was so worried. Alaman said they had Samara and I knew you’d gone to meet her at the airport and they hadn’t even bothered to mention you, I thought they might’ve just…”

“I’m fine,” Porthos says. “It bloody hurts, they bloody shot me! But I’m fine.”

“Aramis will come tomorrow and take that bullet out,” Athos says.

“Mm,” Porthos agrees, scowling. “Sadist.”

Athos laughs, rubbing soothingly over Porthos’s stomach and chest. Porthos sighs, finding Athos’s hand and holding it, knitting their fingers together.

“Now we just have to work out what to do about Rochefort,” Porthos murmurs, half asleep.

Athos nods grimly. Rochefort has it in for them for some reason. He’s not even a policeman or MI6, he’s just a rich prick. Maybe they should target him, con him and take him down. Probably not. They’ll have to do something, though. This is the third time he’s fucked with them this year. Athos vows it’ll be the last.

[numberplates4u-blog]

2016 was ….

Team Bill Rawles Classic Cars Ltd – Everybody has a story – What was your 2016 like? Can you believe it is 2017? The end of a year is a time to reflect, take stock of the year past and plan for the year ahead. How would you describe your year just gone, 2016 was……… Another year has passed and we are all guilty of saying “where did that year go?” Time does seem to go exceptionally fast. It’s not surprising when our lives are crammed full with work, family, friends, socialising, messaging, communicating, events, chores, jobs, projects, travelling, business and pleasure. Our lives, work and society does move at an unprecedented pace. 2016 has seen the rise of Donald Trump to the fall of Cameron’s Britain, a vote to leave the European Union, troubles in the Middle East, devastating acts of terrorism and the loss of a number of high profile celebrities. Can you believe it was a year ago that David Bowie died? Where did 2016 go? We saw good and bad, happiness and sadness. A great deal happens in any one year on a global scale and a lot happens for us individually too. Not the best start for Bill Rawles Classic Cars So how did 2016 start for Bill Rawles Classic Cars? The year started off the same as any new year, full of hopes, excitement, plans and dreams, tinged with anticipation and uncertainty as you can never be complacent. Anyone who knows Bill Rawles knows that he was born with more than his fair share of positivity, get up and go, motivation and a switch that is rarely off! The 24th January 2016 was just like any other Sunday morning. Bill had a full day of jobs planned, ranging from decorating, wood chopping, bonfire burning and any general fixing and fiddling that he thought was required. This was all put on hold when job number one, the decorating, went wrong. Overstretching on a ladder, rubbing down some plaster in the stairwell, ready for a splash of paint, did not go as planned. This school boy error led to Bill taking a high speed ride down the ladder and smashing his foot on a wooden stair. This seemingly insignificant accident, that required a 999 call out, turned out to be a complete life changing episode.       Bill had smashed his calcaneous. A bone we knew nothing about until this day but we have since become well educated and experts on the heel bone or “ducks bill”. It turns out to be known as the lovers fracture because it is classically caused in a cheating wife’s male lover who jumps from the bedroom window to escape the enraged spouse. Ironically it is also a common injury sustained in high impact motoring accidents. All those years worrying about Bills Healey racing and it should have been his DIY exploits that we lost sleep about!   This small mistake led to Bill being in hospital for over 4 weeks, non-weight bearing for 4 months and not really working to full capacity for 5 months.  During this time he developed a bone and flesh infection that initially threatened a loss of limb. Recovery has been slow, with the injury still noticeable as we come up to its anniversary.  Our life revolved around plaster casts, crutches, zimmer frames, mobility scooters, wheel chairs, surgeons, specialists, hospital appointments, endless tablets and physiotherapy. We had an abundance of visitors and well-wishers. These men only coffee mornings required a continuous supply of hot drinks and biscuits.   We survived Bills grumpiness, frustration and demands. It was hard to see such an active person become so incapacitated. We can’t wash over this episode without mentioning that Bill and sons did enjoy racing and competing in time trials around the house driving the mobility scooter to its full potential. Making the best out of a bad situation – Mobility Time Trials After all this 2016 only got better. Did I mention Bills positivity, drive and determination? What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger During Bills long recovery time and inactivity it left him with a lot of time to think. With a fantastic team behind him, they faultlessly kept the business running. It gave Bill minimum stress and maximum time to get back on his feet (literally). Bill Rawles established Rawles Motorsport of Upper Froyle, Hampshire in 1987 and sold it to Andrew Cluett in 2007 (to avoid any confusion, after selling this business, Bill Rawles Classic Cars Ltd has NO association with Andrew Cluett and Rawles Motorsport). Bill subsequently started Bill Rawles Classic Cars Ltd, a small venture working from Home. With the expiration of the five year non- compete contract with Rawles Motorsport, Bill Rawles Classic Cars has grown year on year. Bill used his down time to plan a new step for the business. In July 2016 Bill Rawles Classic Cars moved from his purpose built home premises to a new spacious workshop, only a stone’s throw away. Paul Hardiman, of Classic and Sports Car Magazine came to visit the new workshop and wrote a full page feature which was published in the November 2016 edition of the magazine. Paul said “Since selling up a decade ago, Rawles worked as ‘a man in a shed’ until gathering momentum forced expansion. The theme is still Big Healeys, but this time Rawles v3 – if you will – is more organised, more streamlined, thanks to experience learned over three decades” Click on this link to read the full version Focus on The Big Picture, by Paul Hardiman, Classic & Sports Car Magazine, November 2016, Page 209 Bill Rawles Classic Cars Ltd new workshop – Unit 2, Dukes Mill, Station Approach, Medstead, Alton, Hants, GU34 5EN The workshop comprises new ramps, a four post inspection ramp, three 2 post ramps plus 2 scissor lifts for bodywork, a new tyre fitting machine, lathes, a Bridgeport Mill, a jig borer, an English Wheel, state of the art tig, mig and spot welders. The facilities and strong skill set team caters for all your classic car needs. We have the ability to create bespoke parts and carryout many one off individual requests as well as everyday restorations, servicing, maintenance, paintwork, motorsport prep and engine and gearbox work, trimming, storage and transportation. The team keeps getting better We think that we have got the winning team at Bill Rawles Classic Cars We have the most fantastic, friendly, helpful, dedicated, skilled staff. We are so lucky to have a great bunch of guys, girls and animals who get on so well together. A happy work place is a productive work place. 2016 would not have been such a memorable year without the contribution of each and every team member – THANK YOU – Bill, Rose, Charlie, Will, Adrian, Greg, Tom, Dave, Rob and sometimes Roger, Ollie, Jack, Eleanor, Harriet & Beth At the end of 2015 we welcomed Adrian and Will. Another father and son team within our team. They barely had time to settle in, when Adrian was thrown in at the deep end and found himself in January 2016 taking on the responsibility of running the workshop with limited contact or direction from Bill in his hospital bed. Adrian, an Austin Healey owner himself, heads up the mechanical shop and nothing ever fazes him. It can be heard whispered around the workshop “Adrian is amazing” It doesn’t seem like you are at work when everyone gets on so well In 2016 we also welcomed Dave Thomas, formerly of XRN Engineering Ltd. Dave heads up our dedicated engine building room, coupled with the expertise of Bill Rawles and his race winning engines. When the workshop is running dry you can rely on Dave to make a brew. 2016 saw a good supply of tea. We also welcomed Tom Hayward. Tom is currently doing a motorsport degree and joins us 3 days a week. Tom also had a new born son in December and named him…..Austin. Congratulations from Team Bill Rawles In April 2016 the workshop had the addition of another dog. Alfie had been top dog for nearly 10 years and he had to make way for the very cute Ted. Ted belongs to Charlie Rawles, who heads up our bodyshop and restoration projects. Ted is probably more of an office dog. Alfie’s skill sets are more in barking, licking and looking for treats. Wedding Bells Saturday 23rd July 2016 – Mr & Mrs Rogers One of the highlights of 2016 must be the wedding of Greg and Laura. Greg Rogers works with Charlie Rawles on bodywork and restoration. Greg is our early bird and must be thanked for opening the workshop every work day at 8am, before Bill has even opened his eyes. Greg survived the Stag night, organised by best man Charlie Rawles. The stag was treated to a weekend of mayhem, accompanied by team Bill Rawles (minus Bill because he had a bad foot). The climax of their exploits must have been to watch Greg undertaking his surprise skydiving experience. Ice cool Greg said “yeh it was alright, I loved it” However, we are not sure that Laura approved. Greg and Laura tied the knot on Saturday 23rd July 2016. It was a beautiful day, the sun shone, the laughter flowed and the happiness could be felt. A truly fantastic day organised by two inspirational youngsters. In keeping with his classic car passion, the wedding took on a car theme. Greg had exclusive use of our Jaguar E Type for the weekend and his father in law to be organised a line-up of Renault Alpines. The table settings also had a car theme. We wish you both a long and happy married life. Greg and Laura are off to New Zealand on their honeymoon in February 2017.     Two Austin Healey 100 S sold in 2016 The first Austin Healey 100 S sold at Bill Rawles Classic Cars Ltd in 2016   In 2016 we saw a record number of classic car sales for Bill Rawles Classic Cars Ltd. This included selling two of the most sought after Austin Healey model, The Austin Healey 100 S (Sebring). It is thought that the whereabouts of only about 35 of the 50 cars built is known today, so it is not often that they become available for sale on the open market. Not One but Two Austin Healey 100 S sold at Bill Rawles Classic Cars Ltd in 2016 Many published reports and articles, detailing 2016 classic car sales and predicting the 2017 trend generally lean towards discussions that the classic car market is still strong and growing, with popular marques still holding value or slightly increasing. Hagerty Classic Car Insurance reports “the UK Classic Car Market is still growing. Big Healeys have risen quite significantly in value in the last few years and values have now stabilised. Good examples are still in demand, especially cars with racing history or some kind of provenance” New Happy Healey owner driving off in Roy Jackson-Moores Healey 100 M Spec BN2 Whatever the global pattern maybe, we are not seeing any waning enthusiasm or decreased desire for classic car ownership. Interest and inquiries remain high. People are either adding to collections, making an investment or realizing hard earned cash into an interest and hobby that can provide enjoyment, excitement, adventure and new friendships as well as hopefully increasing in value too. We think that our honest approach, realistic rather than over inflated sales prices and fixed price sales commission are a strong determining factor as to why we sold 30 classic cars in 2016. Sold in 2016 and exported to Japan – Austin Healey 100 M spec BN1 In 2016 we sold the following vehicles:- 1x TR4 1x TR6 1x MG TF 1500 1x MG Ashley Sprite 1x E Type Series 2 2x Austin Healey 100 S (Sebring) 3x Austin Healey Frogeye Sprites 3x Austin Healey 100-6 7x Austin Healey 100 including M spec Marques 10x Austin Healey 3000 Austin Healey 3000 MK I BN7 commission built and sold by Bill Rawles Classic Cars in 2016   The first car that we sold in January 2016 was a commission built Austin Healey 3000 MK I BN7, which a year later has been resold by Graeme Hunt Car Sales of Kensington – The sales spec is extremely complimentary “A remarkable Healey, built literally no expense spared. Over 2000 man hours were lavished producing what must be, if not the best, then certainly one of the very best examples anywhere in the world” The Graeme Hunt sales spec goes on to say “We simply cannot express how wonderful this big Healey really is and to see it is to behold the wondrous works completed by the very well renowned Bill Rawles and his team” Classic Car owner? Bored? Classic Car owner and the word bored can surely never be used in the same sentence. 2016 was just like any other year with a full calendar of places to go, people to see and things to do in a classic car. We never seem to have enough time to do all the events, shows and gatherings that we are invited to. Bill tried not to let the chronic pain and disability of his injury get in the way. The Austin Healey Club New Forest Austin Healey Club, Chairman, Jim Finch takes his first selfie at the Annual Dinner Dance at The Hotel Miramar, Bournemouth As members of The Austin Healey Club and in particular as supporters and committee members of The New Forest Austin Healey Club, we try to support as many of their organised events as possible. We attempt to attend the monthly pub meets and a few of the jollies. In 2016 we joined the annual Dinner Dance in Bournemouth, Drive it Day and the skittles night. White Dove Collectors’ Transport Show Proud to support The White Dove Collectors’ Transport Show For a number of years we have sponsored The White Dove Collectors’ Transport Show. The classic car show has become an annual event not to be missed in our Bill Rawles Classic Cars calendar. Year on year this classic car show has grown and flourished. Every year this event achieves a staggering gathering of vintage and classic cars, bikes, military and commercial vehicles. Once a year a quiet field in Kingsley, near Bordon, Hampshire, is transformed by the dedicated hard working White Dove committee, to a delightful day for socialising, chilling, relaxing, eating, drinking and tapping your toes to live music. All this is done with the sole aim of raising money for The Phyllis Tuckwell Hospice in Farnham. In 2016 we were again blessed with beautiful sunshine and a day full of laughter, happiness and good memories. Team Rawles all pitch in to help at The White Dove Collectors’ Transport Show – raising money for The Phyllis Tuckwell Hospice The White Dove committee said “We would like to thank the Bill Rawles Classic Car team for their support, commitment and dedication to help us to be able to carry out all the events and the work that we achieve. Thank you for sharing our vision. Also thank you to The New Forest Austin Healey Club for supporting the show for the second year running” 2016 saw £12,263.79 raised for the Hospice. Bill Rawles Classic Cars and The New Forest Austin Healey Club at The White Dove   Healey Drivers Club – International weekend 2016 Healey Drivers Club – International Weekend 2016 – 13th – 15th May – Arundel   Healey Drivers Club – International Weekend 2016 – 13th – 15th May – Arundel This year’s International Meeting was quite a significant gathering as it recognised and celebrated the 70 years since the fledgling Donald Healey Motor Company produced its first car, which was the 4-seater Westland, capable of over 100 mph and the 60th Anniversary of the Donald Healey Motor Company achieving 201.10 mph in the Austin Healey Streamliner at Bonneville Salt Flats. Bill Rawles Classic Cars were very happy to be invited to be part of this gathering, we were on hand to provide any assistance with the cars should it be needed. The Bill Rawles Classic Car Team were on hand, smiling as always and ready to sort out any misbehaving Healeys The weekend started on Friday afternoon with over 60 Healeys and their owners arriving at The Hilton Avisford Park Hotel, Arundel. Saturday consisted of a 35 mile planned drive, taking the cars through the beautiful countryside of the South Downs National Park and arriving at Amberley Museum & Heritage Centre.   Saturday evening the guest speaker at the Gala Dinner was Ian Northeast from the Bloodhound SSC project who gave an inspirational presentation about the Supersonic land-speed car which is a new high technology project aiming to break 1,000 mph barrier and set a new world land speed record. Sunday consisted of another planned drive to Arundel Castle, followed by lunch back at The Hilton Avisford Park Hotel and Prize giving before everyone said their goodbyes and departed probably feeling a bit tired but very happy after such a lovely weekend. Who misbehaved the most – the cars or their owners? Somebody used the wrong fuel! Natters and Nibbles 2016 saw a record number of visitors enjoying our Saturday Morning Natters & Nibbles   In 2012 we had the idea of running a monthly classic car meet at our workshop. 2016 was our fifth year of Natters & Nibbles and collecting for The Alton & Petersfield Multiple Sclerosis Society and The Phyllis Tuckwell Hospice. We were blessed with amazing weather and a record number of people and classic cars attending. We make the coffee and cakes, cut the grass and put up the bunting. The rest is over to our visitors to socialise, chat and have a good morning out. In August one of our Healey customers rushed home and fired up his aeroplane. Before we knew it we had an unscheduled air display of a Yak over our coffee morning. How cool is that?   We have not yet counted the amounts collected but we are confident that you have collected well over £500.00 for our charities – Thank you Raising money for The Alton & Petersfield and District Multiple Sclerosis Society & The Phyllis Tuckwell Hospice    Thames Valley Austin Healey Club Technical Morning   There must be a collective name for a group of men around an engine?   The Thames Valley Austin Healey Club approached Bill Rawles and asked if he would hold a technical morning. Way, way back many years ago Bill held a similar event and apparently it was so much enjoyed that it is still talked about today. So on Saturday 05th November 2016 we welcomed over 25 Healey owners into the workshop. All best laid plans usually go awry. We had a quick planning meeting where it was decided Rose & the girls were on refreshments, Dave was ready for engine building questions, Charlie & Greg were prepared for restoration and bodywork demonstrations, Adrian was all geared up for the mechanical issues, Will was on crowd control and Bill was on tuning and engine set up. This structured format went out the window. The attendees made their own agenda, stayed more than a morning and seemed to thoroughly enjoy themselves. We are not sure what information they gleamed, if any but it was a good social gathering. In fact they enjoyed themselves so much we have been asked to host again in 2017 The Thames Valley Technical Morning was a success and they have asked to repeat a visit in 2017   Anything else? As well as all of the above we managed to fit in the classic car shows that our local Herald Group Newspapers organise in the surrounding towns of Alton, Farnham and Petersfield. We appeared at a local pub,Classic & Vintage car show, held at The Hinton Arms. We went on a few lunches and pub meets with another small classic car club and we even managed a few trips in the E Type to the coast and National Trust properties. Classic Car owner? Bored? I don’t think so The Mac 4×4 Challenge The “Mac 4×4” is intended to be a fun “challenge” over 3 or 4 days for 4×4 enthusiasts raising money for Macmillan Cancer In March 2016 Greg Rogers asked if he could take a few days off work to take part in the Mac 4×4 Challenge. The 2016 event marked the 15th annual run. The weekend consists of a test of navigational skills, observation, on and off road driving ability and endurance; by day and night. Each team consists of only two people and one vehicle. The main aim is to raise money for The Macmillan Cancer Support. The Macmillan Cancer Support is the UKs major charity devoted to the support, treatment and care of people living with cancer and their families. The Mac 4×4 Challenge supports Macmillan’s continuing efforts to provide better support for everyone affected through Macmillan nurses, doctors, buildings, patient grants and information services.   It is intended to be a long weekend of fun covering between 400 and 1000 miles with various “tests” along the way. Initially teams only know where they are starting from; the route develops with the issue of road books as the event unfolds until the finish. Night stops mean sleeping rough, in the vehicle or a tent. We are proud to say that Greg survived the 4 days with his future father in law and went on to marry Laura later in the year. They also raised a substantial amount for the charity. We are pleased to say Greg survived 4 days on the challenge with his future father in law and raised over £3600.00 for the Macmillan Cancer Support   A Bus man’s Holiday – The North Coast 500   A bus man’s holiday is defined as a holiday where you do something similar to your usual work instead of having a rest from it… Well in October 2016 that is exactly what we did. We (Bill and Rose) combined delivering a sales car to Aberdeen and picking up a restoration job in Inverness with a short break. We did a whistle stop tour of The North Coast 500. The North Coast 500 is described as Scotland’s answer to Route 66. The North Coast 500 is a 516 mile scenic route around the north coast of Scotland, starting and ending at Inverness Castle. The circular route skirts the very top of the United Kingdom and consists of an open road taking in beautiful scenery, mainly shared with sheep, deer, wildlife and a few other people. From East to West you get to see fairy-tale castles, architectural wonders, ruins, lochs, beaches, towering Munroe’s and mountains. These northern climes are remote, challenging and beautiful, offering unparalleled views of the dreamy highlands. This corner of Scotland also has plenty of mouth-watering food and drink to delight your taste buds. With a bit of planning you can find some great accommodation, tea rooms and restaurants. In 7 days we managed 3000 miles and nearly 1000 photos later we can say we would recommend this trip to anyone, especially in a classic car. Will we definitely be returning to do trip again, but in a classic car not a mini bus.    Did anyone mention motorsport in 2016? Rounding up our summary of 2016 would not be complete if we didn’t mention the little bit of motorsport that we also seem to cram into the year. Motorsport in 2016 was not an option for Bill with his injury. Stepping up to the mark, to fill that vacant race car, was youngest son, Jack Rawles. Could we have a prime suspect from the accident scene? Some even say that Jack Rawles shook that ladder!!! Jack Rawles had a very successful year racing his Dad’s Healey at Silverstone, Brands Hatch and Thruxton in the Classic Sports Car championship. Jack Rawles achieved class positions at all three rounds. He was invited to share two drivers with David Grace in his Austin Healey 3000 at the Spa Six Hour and The Algarve Classic Festival. Again he achieved success at both these over-seas events.   The two highlights of Jacks 2016 racing year must be winning both Healey races at The Castle Combe Autumn Classic and becoming the 2016 Healey Driver International Champion and setting the fastest lap record in a Healey at Portimao, during the Algarve Classic Festival. Jack was also presented with an award, by David Brabham at the Classic and Sports Car award presentation and Dinner evening. Further reading of some of these events can be found by following these links:- Jack Rawles & Jake Hill race at Silverstone Jack Rawles & Hugo Holland Bosworth race at Brands Hatch A double win for Jack Rawles at Castle Comb Lap Record created by Jack Rawles at Algarve Classic Festival As a business we also sponsor the Jensen Healey and Big Healey categories of the Healey Sport Hill Climb Championship. In November we went along to the Healey Sport Hop at the Village Hotel, Swindon. “We” comprising the whole family and the Healey. The Healey Sport elite gathered for their annual nosh, knees-up and prize giving. Rose Rawles was there and ready to present the prizes for the Big Healey category of the Hill Climb Championship. The evening also remembered Allan Cameron, who lost his battle with cancer in January. Allan was the technical support behind Healey Driver International, as well as its General Manager.   Allan’s family, Carol, Neil and Drew very graciously made three magnificent trophies available to commemorate the 2016 race events. The winners are able to keep the trophies in perpetuity to remember the very special contribution Allan made to the Healey competition movement over the years as organiser, driver, participant, car preparer and an encouraging parent behind the racing efforts of both sons, Neil and Drew. Jack Rawles was honoured to be presented with one of these trophies for winning both HDI races at The Castle Combe Autumn Classic. During the evening, Jack Rawles was also asked to team up with June Stokes to reward retiring Chairman Derek Ross with a fine Whiskey Decanter for his many years of dedicated support to Healey Sport. We – The Healey and all the family – went to The Healey Sport Annual Prize Giving and Dinner   So, where did 2016 go?   You blink and before you know it, Christmas has come around again. Summing up 2016; from adversity came opportunity. The year definitely started on a negative note but ended on a positive one. We achieved far more than we set out to do at the end of 2015. We crammed a lot into 365 days and in our small way we have carried on with creating our legacy. There is something that this Blog has failed to mention and that is all the different jobs that were in the workshop. 2016 was a very busy year in the workshop. A big thank you to all our customers too. We left the title of this Blog unfinished; Are we now in a better position to fill in the blank? 2016 was…. a potential disaster sad scary frightening unpredictable a wakeup call busy buzzing exciting eventful memorable full of change fantastic not boring happy good On reflection it was all of the above and probably a great many things more.   What words would finish your same sentence? 2016 was……….. Happy New Year from Bill & Rose Rawles and all our team. Onward and upwards into 2017                                   The post 2016 was …. appeared first on Bill Rawles Classic Cars.

https://www.rawlesclassiccars.co.uk/blog/2016-was/

[aubreyhans-days]

24 going on 25

As I start the countdown, I decided to do something that I have not been doing for years: writing a birthday reflection. Now I think ever since Mummy passed away I have not been doing my reflections because I begin to view time as something precious, and to maximize it, I believe we have to look forward instead of looking back. Plus the working world does not give you time to do so: it’s aways learning through doing; correcting mistakes as you go through the notion…so on and so forth. Hence like our students, reflection becomes something “useless and a waste of time.”(I wonder what counts as not wasting their time sometimes, given how they waste their time every day)

But for some reason I am still awake at this hour and it has become a habit that I do not do any work at home, so here I am sitting on a tin can far above the world…OK sorry I am just lazing on my bed balancing my phone precariously, preventing it from slamming flat on my face while typing a post on my tumblr.

OK moving forth to my reflection. 24 was a rather interesting year, going back to school and being a student with the mentality of an adult(tendency to chao Gen is super high) hurhurhurhur and living in hall for one last time. Then fast forward to this Feb, when I almost have the biggest breakdown in my life because of a rough practicum, and then bamp you get thrown back into the workforce. Countless lesson prep, 273736635 conflicts that could have been solved if teachers can give one big slap to students or use super glue to glue their mouths shut or flush them down the toilet bowl for every curse word. Not forgetting the 183736 arrows shot at you plus countless taichi sessions so that you can leave the office in the evening with minimal injuries. So yeah, I can feel the tough reality grinding me pretty much every day. So much for smirking at the presenter who said the first year of BT-ship will make you doubt yourself and burn you out.

On a bright note, I begin to understand the job of a teacher better and see for myself that some of the things that I was so adamant on seems to not work for the 00s kiddos. I still have a lot to come to terms with but it is good that my first school is doing a very excellent job bursting bubbles of my dreams. The days when I am disappointed with my darlings taught me how to lower my expectations so that my health does not take the brunt; the days when I was shocked by how lax I was with them taught me that I must stick to my principles and not lose myself to the easy way out. So yeah, kudos to myself for being able to see learning points from every experience.(now I sound like Raju from “the guide” because his words were shit with bits of gems inside) In essence, 24 is a year of getting jolted up from my dreams and facing the harsh reality and working world.

Next 24 is also a year of crisis. Bad skin with frequent outbreaks, tyres round my tummy, recovery rate slower than before…things you took for granted because you are young COMES TO A HALT AT 24. Never have I thought I will live long to see myself go swimming on a regular basis, or getting a gym membership because I need to stay healthy. In the past I was a heck care fatso who believes that being a healthy fatso is all that matters. NO. Being a fatso makes it easier for guys you like to be taken by other girls. Being a fatso means that your are that 1 in a million unsuccessful cases that can’t get a match on dating apps.(pretty much like that 0.1% germ that couldn’t give Dettol a perfect 10) But being a fatso cost you more money and also makes you recover slower, because your demand for the repair mechanics in your body starts to increase compared to the supply. Which makes you feel tired easily, and makes you feel awful for yourself(so much that you enter the vicious cycle of feeling awful then you comfort yourself with ice cream and wine, only to eel even more awful) Then you realise train tracks are appearing everywhere, even on your hands which were FREAKING SMOOTH THANKS TO NATURAL FILLERS CALLED FATS. So you started using a part of your money to buy better skincare and makeup, so that you feel better for trying. While you are still healthy, you realised your body may soon be showing obvious signs of aging, hence you decide to be a exercising fatso that takes care of your skin, so that the future you will be better. So yeah, 24th crisis also makes it a year of self-discovery(the innocent kind) and then trying to make yourself prettier and healthier, all for the sake of your future. So kudos for finally being able to become a better you just for yourself and no one else!

Lastly, 24 is a year of being comfortable with yourself. I hated that part of me that wants to be lazy on some days, and that part of me that loves being alone. It seems so quiet and still that the part of you that was conditioned to be a group dweller wants to silence this ‘loner’ you. But at 24, I learn that while some people might point fingers at you and whisper behind your back, you just…learn to say “no” or tell them your actual desires at times. Because you need that me-time to stay in your man cave. The tension and stress at work is so high these days, so yeah it’s OK to leave some time to be lazy, and maybe throw in another few mins/hours, BECAUSE YOU AIN’T A FREAKING MACHINE. Come on, even machines need downtime and maintenance. So kudos, for finding that part of you that was stifled by the judgements of others.

So marching into 25, I hope that I can learn more on how to improve on my time management, especially at work so I don’t make the same mistake like now where I have to think hard about how to finish my SOW. I hope that my relationship with others can improve, so maybe I won’t be Dwight from “The Office” and hopefully not be the last one left on the shelves. Next I hope that I can watch my spendings so I can afford to live a wonderful spinster life if it is so. Lastly I hope that my friends know how much I live them and that I am always thankful and grateful that they decided to stick to me like how Doraemon sticks to Nobita even though he suck big time.

It was a great 24, so let’s rock it, 25!!!

[3ennyj]

Road race on a fixie?

It’s been a while since I’ve written something. I prefer the visual media, probably because it’s easier or that I’m lazy. Also Akul I know you’re reading this and wondering where the fuck is part three, it’s coming maccha.

2017 has been a great year so far, in a nutshell, spent the NY’s with my best mate Sid, made radical changes to my lifestyle by staying clean (drug and smoke free), continued to eat clean (plant based food), committed myself to make it into the final bunch of the Red Hook Crit 2018 at London, started the store (LBB cycles) with my dope ass partner Shariq and started dating the coolest gal ever, Steffi.

Just two days back I participated and completed my first road race and the longest race ever on my fixed gear bike. Honestly I was nervous, like really fucking nervous. Had these various thoughts lingering in my head, will I hang on with the main group?, am I on the right gear ratio?, will I cramp up?, will I manage with two bottles of water and the ride food or will I bonk like a boss?, the one thing I knew for sure though, was I’ve been consistent with my training, my recovery and with the food that I’ve been eating, and the faith people near and dear had in me.

Lets zoom out to the week that was leading up to the BBCh Bangalore Classic. I was into week 18 of structured training that I developed for myself based on research and mostly based on talking to mates like Francis and Naveen who were and are elite national racers respectively, and getting feedback from online acquaintances who’ve ridden the Red Hook. I decided to do one day of mid week training on the rollers working on my lactate tolerance efforts or pyramid intervals and skipping my strength session at the gym. After all you don’t want to stress your legs out too much on race week, rather keep them fresh though I commute to the store. What I did keep keen attention to was my food and hydration. Eight weeks back I did my first elite criterium with the roadies and put out an OK-OK performance, I mean I was under-geared (48x15:”84.16GI), for the non trackies, that means at 90rpm my speed would be 36km/h, which is not that great for a flat, and fast circuit, also I was just 10 weeks into my training with no strength training and my legs weren’t ready for more gnarlier ratio, back to the point I was making, I did not keep a check on my hydration, salt intake and the finer details such as are the right minerals getting into my system, and I cramped like a mother fucking goat! I couldn't ride for the next five days, I literally thought my cycling days are over, and the doctor who I’d not like to mention, told me I had a lack of B12 and Vitamin D, since I’m on a vegan/plant based lifestyle. Turns out I had a lack of salt and essential minerals that come from green leafy veggies in my food, and the absence of using an ORS post hard training rides. Since then I’ve been best friends with methi (fenugreek) and palak (spinach). Also I stopped using all forms of processed junk that includes alternate protein, I now use a bunch of superfoods such as spirulina, amla, moringa, chia seeds just to name a few as a part of my recovery meals and shakes that I source from, I must mention them, Happy Health Me. Must I say, I am getting stronger. Not bragging but, I ride 300+ kms a week, work out, work six days a week, prepare my food and manage my house, to be able to this day after day, and still stay fresh as fuck, I blame it on the plant based diet. If you need to know more, talk to me.

That being said, three day to go and I was still nervous, they say the best way to make sure you’re going to do something, is to announce it on social media. That’s what I did. I announced that I’d be doing the 132km elite road race on the fixed gear. You know that made no difference. I was still nervous as fuck. Speaking to Steffi, she reassured me that I’d do well, rather I’d send it, and that really helped. I made sure I loaded up on the carbs “ethically”, stuck to eating a higher potion of Matta Kerala rice than normal with my usual array of mains such as rajma, channa and black eyed  peas. The only thing different about race prep, was eating little more rice than usual. Another saying, a clean bike is a fast bike, not only did I clean the bike but I spring cleaned my house, I don’t know if that made a difference but it’s a superstition now. Cleaning the bike involved transforming this bike into a race machine. Out goes the tyre liners and bike lights, after all every gram counts, throwing out the tyre liner turned out to be a big mistake though, you’ll know more.

I usually do all my rides fasted, and again after much research I figured that having a good healthy meal, two to four hours before a road race is essential. I made my usual power porridge potion though half in size two point five hours before the race. The slow digesting oats along with the fresh fruits, nuts and superfoods makes for an explosive pre race meal. I pre packed six pieces of my brownies which I happily forgot to carry in my tote. Shariq picked me up and we were running late thanks to a flat car tyre, these were signs that I should have seen, and we made it just 20 minutes before the race kicked off. I’ll be honest with you, I was so nervous, I did not realise when the started, next thing you know we’re rolling down NH7 and I’m asking Vivek, has the race started!

The next 72kms was one of the best rides I’ve ridden so far. Averaging close to 38km/h, with a bunch of highly energised individuals from the likes of national, state, category champions, and  my friends who I’ve made thanks to cycling. It felt like we were on a happy go lucky Sunday group ride. My plan for the race was very simple, ride hard, have fun, stay safe and finish. I was staying true to the first three parts for sure and that made sure that the fourth part was easily achievable. Since we had a good tail wind on the way out, I decided to do my bit by heading up front and working to pull the group. The feeling is amazing. I was out in front with Venky, Aman, Tarun and a couple of solo pulls, until we reached this flyover may be 25kms out, unlike the roadies I cannot coast, so I continued to churn down the flyover at a high pace, I did my usual check glance to see no one’s on my wheel, and what looked like a solo breakaway that I did not ask for. I kept checking as I descended at about 45km/h to see that the peloton was taking it real easy for some reason, except for Vinesh and Tarun who decided to chase me. Why did they do it, no one knows, not even them. Then next thing you know we’ve officially formed the first break away of the race with an ever increasing gap. 

I mean we were like three little children laughing and chatting, having the most jolliest of time thinking why the fuck did we do what we just fucking did, this was an epic uncalled for photo-op, with Krishna pulling up near us and Shariq and the photographer having a  field day capturing us. Everyone loved it! Vinesh suddenly calls out, man it’s 10kms and these guys have still not caught up, well that’s because I was setting a decent pace of 39km/h through our breakaway. After much discussion, actually none, we decided to slow ourselves down and join in with the peloton as it made no sense to breakaway so early and waste our energy, Good call. Our pace was now down to 32km/h and the next thing you know we’re back with the peleton. Honestly we could have pulled it off. Vinesh and Tarun, I know you’ll are reading this, we should do it, for the Nandi Epic may be? Back in the peloton life is good now. We came up on this really awesome descent which of course had a speed breaker and for some reason I really slowed down on this, the next thing you know I got dropped like a fucking hot iron, I was over revving at 155rpm doing 67km/h and still couldn’t catch up with the bunch, which then led us into a gradual climb, this was my place to attack to catch up, with my heart rate reaching the lower end of my zone 5, I finally did catchup with the peloton, cause’ I knew if I got dropped here it was going to be a lonely ride back to the finish, I knew things would change at the U-turn, just that I didn’t want it to happen this early. The feeling of catching up to the peloton can be compared to getting lost in a crowd as a kid and then finally seeing your parents, I swear that’s how happy I was to catch up and join the peleton. As we approached the U-turn I could see the positioning get into place, and riding brakeless in a group of roadies, it’s situations like these that you have to be the most careful, I almost touched Maninders wheel as we took the turn because he jammed his brakes, thankfully I weaved around and took the patli galli out. As soon as you exit the turn the pace was full gas. I held on for about 5 kilometres before being dropped on one of the descents yet again. This time a catch up was not happening, with an insane headwind and a gnarly climb I eased off and worked on bringing the heart rate down, that's when Shariq and Krishna pulled up next to me, motivating me to go on and kill it. They said the guy in front of you is Nagraj Harsha, the ironman, bridge the gap and work with him. He was probably around 300m ahead of me when I started to bridge the gap and finally caught upto him. I’ve never met the guy and we didn’t speak, all we did was work in a pair and work hard we did to fight the headwind and the climbs. While I did most of the pulling, I was more than happy too, we slowly started caching up with the other dropped riders. I wanted to build a group of the stronger riders like Vinesh, Tarun and Rajat, but that didn’t work too well. Oh and special mention to Riyaz for tanking my bottle up when I went dry, it was my first bottle refill/transfer on the road while moving, it felt very pro for some reason! So Nagraj pulled away and went on ahead and it was just Rajat, Tarun and myself that remained. Then Tarun and me, the next thing you know we see Rajat flying past us, I have no idea where did the lad create that energy, but he was flying, since Tarun was cramping out already, I told him I was gonna chase him and stick with him. I clung onto him for dear life literally and we covered a solid distance. We were now 20kms from the finish when I decided to ease it out. I could feel the bonking’ness feeling set in, and that’s when I had the Lärabars, that Tarun saved my life with, remember I forgot to pack my brownies. Big thanks to you man. 13kms from the finish, 119kms down averaging 34km/h, I was switching bottles, both hands of the handlebar replacing the water bottle that was now empty with my ORS bottle in my jersey when I almost felt my front wheel sweep under me. I quickly got a grip on my handle bar and countered the fall. As I settled into finishing mode I could feel the loss of traction from my front wheel, what do you know I have a puncture! The kind of cuss words that came out of my mouth would have made the devil happy. I couldn't believe it. I was fighting fit, ready for a spectacular finish, by the looks of it was going to make it to the top 15 at least. I pulled up on the side and looked out for help. I wasn’t carrying any spares on me as everything was in my tote that I though Shariq was carrying. The Spectrum Racing team car pulled up and Vivek, Shankar and their other team mate who I didn’t know were super helpful. They gave me a tube, a CO2 cylinder and a phone to call Shariq. I told Shariq my location and was waiting on him as I needed a 15mm wrench to unscrew the bolts of the front wheel. Almost 20 minutes passed and I did not see him any where, that’s when I decided to walk and find a wrench. Tried my luck at a petrol bunk, and finally after a kilometre of walking I found a bike puncture shop and started working on the bike. Of course I was surrounded by 30 odd villagers all interested to find out what a fellow in his undies is going to do with a bike tube. The thing is when Shankar gave me the cylinder I asked him how to use it, which he didn’t know, so when I attached the cylinder and did some twists and turns it worked and the tube was filled with this cold gas, the villagers were so amazed by this process I told them this was magic which broke the ice and got them laughing. After a quick 20 second breakdown of what I was doing with my broken Kannada I was back on the road. I lost 45 minutes to this fucking puncture. Though disappointed that I could have finished better, I DID FINISH. I’m happy. I’m looking forward to my rest week starting next week and to my first fixed gear crit I’ll be doing in Dresden, Germany later in September. T-41.

Video: https://goo.gl/zhKjui

Strava: https://goo.gl/fU4dvX