#saw a friend rb an adhd post w tags abt their psychiatrist saying they ''talk w scattered thoughts & only sometimes circle back'' | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

serialreblogger · 3 years ago

Text

i don't want medication to make me less loud and annoying i want medication so i can get work done without an anxiety disorder and make breakfast before 12:30

#adhd #adhd things #hyperempathy tw #linden's originals #saw a friend rb an adhd post w tags abt their psychiatrist saying they ''talk w scattered thoughts & only sometimes circle back''#and adding that the psychiatrist wants to ''medicate that out of'' them #like GOD i am. so goddamn sick of the psychiatric industry. so fuckin tired of neuroableism at EVERY FUCKIN TURN #i don't WANT them to change who i am! i don't want my adhd to be Fixed! i LIKE the way my brain works!#it makes me smarter! the ability to see and hold together dozens and dozens of connections at once & grasp the innate interconnectedness of #of - EVERYTHING of society and oppression and individual personalities and - english literature and symbolism and art -#i may be intellectually disabled in that i can't conceptualize spatial or temporal things and cannot do simple addition easily #but that's part of me too. i don't Want you to make me Normal i've never been normal and these things DON'T BOTHER ME #what bothers me is that i'm slowly starving because i can't make my own meals with any consistency & have at least 1 chronic illness from #the severe anxiety disorder i developed just to avoid failing out of school (or 'failing' at meeting expectations re: standardized testing)#i want medication that will stimulate my brain the way it is CONSTANTLY trying to do on its own with just my environment & imagination #and i still can't get the stimulation i need! like the more i learn about adhd (from other people With adhd not fuckin dsm research)#the more obvious it is to me Why i'm so prone to depression. like the trauma doesn't help but i also just Am Not (EVER) getting enough #of the right kinds of stimulation/of basic dopamine levels. my neurotransmitters are fucked y'all #my brain is structured differently and that makes me Better Than Normal at some things and Worse Than Normal at others #and i'm fuckin okay with that. i like it. i love my weird brain in all its strengths and weaknesses #i don't want my brain's *shape* to be ''fixed.'' i just want to give it what it Needs - what i need -#and am not fucking able to get from the world around me. fuck i'm tired #fuck it y'all one of these days i'm gonna write a ground-up biopsychological explanation of adhd and the dsm can fuckin bite me #anyway #that's all #linden in the tags

248 notes · View notes