#same with people who hate van and lottie and tai and shauna and misty and ben and whoever the fuck else for being 'bad people'

[sheryl-lee]

yellowjackets rant time :)

people whining that natalie’s death was “shitty writing” makes me want to bang my head against the wall. like are you seriously shocked that the show about tragedy and murder has tragedy and murder in it. are you seriously shocked that the show about fucked up people has fucked up people in it.

[bloodhivelottie]

yellowjackets headcanons dump!!!!!🐝

cuz these mfs are always buzzing around in my brain like the little bees that they are

• the yjs who got into the most shoving matches on the field are tai and shauna but nat talks the most shit just to rile the other team up lol. lottie also talks shit but in a real sassy way🙄

• jackie loves sweet foods but her mom never lets her eat them so whenever her and shauna go to the mall they sneak to get the biggest ice cream sundae known to man and share it :]

• van used to hold movie nights (at tai’s house) for the team and misty came once but she ate way too many skittles and threw up on the carpet and she wasn’t invited again after that😭

• lottie was a school transfer and didn’t have many friends at first which is why she joined the yellowjackets. the coach was crazy impressed with her skill and jackie started out really jealous and everyone was like ohhh we have a rivalry brewing!!! but jackie quickly came around and she was actually the one who started calling her lottie instead of charlotte

• van & nat were best friends as kids and lived in the same trailer park but when they were 14 vans mom moved to an apt and the two of them stopped hanging out and talking as much but they still have a bond with each other

• van and nat love the movie my cousin vinny and they still quote it all the time

• jackie was a HUGE fan of mia hamm and used to have a poster of her in her room but her mom got mad at her saying it wasn’t ladylike so jackie gave it to shauna but it’s been lying around shauna’s room ever since :[

• misty’s parents are rich doctors or something who are never home so she spends all her time either making super over the top collages of celebrity men or making a diary where she writes about literally everything and cuts out her yearbook and draws hearts around the boy she has a crush on. OR she’s up to some heinous shit researching crazy stuff. i just know she’s wayyyy too into serial killer info. and she’s prob dissected a frog or two in her time

• tai was the only one who was still able to enjoy soccer after the rescue. but i think van would’ve tried and maybe she still casually watched the uswnt until the 99’ers retired but after that she stopped watching.

• a lot of them turned vegetarian after they got rescued. i feel like nat’s vegetarian which is why she reacts like REALLY🙄 to misty when she eats beef jerky in s1 lol. lottie is absolutely vegan

• i like the hc people have that shauna’s jewish. jackie’s christian and she tries her best to celebrate shauna’s religious holidays w her but she always gets shit wrong but it’s the thought that counts right? nats definitely catholic but doesnt gaf

• lottie has a pet cat that she literally adores because it’s all she has to keep her company in her giant house cause her dad tells her not to talk to the maids :/

• nat can’t afford to buy her own guitar but kevyn lets her borrow his and he’s in the middle of teaching her how to play during the time she qualifies for nationals so the only song she knows how to play is come as you are by nirvana

• opposing teams HATE yj set pieces cause nat takes corners for the right side and tai and lottie are tall as fuck so they convert from corners a lottt >:)

• when shit got bad with nat or van’s family when they were younger they’d sneak out of their trailer windows and meet at a specific spot just to hang out and they’d talk all night or nat listens to her walkman and watches van practice tricks on her shitty beat up skateboard

• one time in the locker room nat’s putting a tape into her walkman and shauna notices and brings it up and they start chatting a little about their similar music taste for a minute until jackie appears and sweeps shauna away and nat’s just left there with her eyebrows raised cause she didn’t realize shauna was actually cool like that. LOL

• one day it was raining like crazy during practice and the field was muddy as fuck and tai accidentally slipped and got covered in mud. van’s crying laughing cause tai’s pissed about it until she slips and falls into the mud too. she ends up throwing some at the other girls for laughing at her and jackie gets hit and she’s like “oh so that’s how it’s gonna be huh?” and the next second everyone’s soaked and muddy and laughing and they all have to trudge back to the locker room afterwards and when they walk past coach scott he’s just shaking his head smiling

[disregardcanon]

yellowjackets disney's descendants au

okay so a quick run down of basic roles. these will not directly correspond to everything but it's a basic framework

how the roles line up

VKs

natalie as mal

jackie as evie

shauna as carlos

van as jay

crystal as dizzy tremaine

AKs

lottie as ben

tai as audrey

jeff as chad charming

misty as jane

laura lee as rapunzel and eugene's daughter <3

akilah as tai's best friend in auradon tiana and naveen's daughter. if she has a corresponding role it's probably lonnie?

mari is a madrigal who hates singing. absolutely ABHORS IT

coach martinez as the tourney coach who is also the coach from airbud because i think that's HILARIOUS.

airbud as dude the dog

travis and javi don't really have corresponding canon roles but they're here and i love them

okay so. here is The Vision

lottie has recently been given the crown of auradon. this is due to absentee parenting from king malcolm and his wife, who are off doing vacations because they had so much fairy tale bullshit over the course of their lives. queen charlotte the first decides that it's unfair for the children of the isle of the lost to suffer for the actions of their parents and does some research about who would be the best to invite to move to auradon to test out a relocation program.

tai is the daughter of sleeping beauty who has issues with supernatural sleepwalking, presumably a strange holdover from her mother's curse. she's not entirely sold on lottie's idea, but she tries to give it a chance, at least. if there's anyone who feels stifled by every bit of auradon's pomp and circumstance and Why Don't You Find a Nice Prince or Nobleman to Settle Down With? it's tai.

lottie, tai, akilah, laura lee, and mari are The Tourney Girls. there are some other extras out there but they are the main ones. airbud is the next most important player. he doesn't talk he's just there barking and being Amazing At The Game. travis is there but he hates it. like, absolutely HATES IT. he is so bad at tourney but there aren't enough good players for his dad not to have an excuse to make him play. tai akilah and mari really resent him for Being There, Sucking, laura lee is kind because she feels like she has to be, but lottie actually really likes him. she doesn't talk shit so travis talks nothing but shit. For Her

javi is always around just chilling in the stands and drawing. he goes to the attached auradon middle school.

misty wants to be the equipment manager and do lots of Cool Things TM for Cool People TM but her mom wants her to do certain fairy things. and she HATES IT.

okay so our VKs

natalie- okay so natalie is mal but she has a different backstory. maleficent did not want to deal with raising a kid, but since abortion does not exist in descendants, she dropped the kid off with her dad and peaced out. the dad was clayton from tarzan and natalie never knows who her biological mom is because her canon mom is around and married to clayton. things go basically the same as yellowjackets canon where a year before the events of descendants clayton is beating her step mom and nat gets the gun and he accidentally puts a bullet through his own head. her "step mom" that she never knew wasn't her bio mom throws her out on the streets with nothing but the name of her bio mom and nat, angry and hurting, goes directly to maleficent's lair. maleficent, who never wanted to have a child, is more than happy to have an angry, powerful teenager who presumably killed her shitty ex.

jackie is evie and mrs. taylor is the evil queen. she grows up with all of evie's Must Be Perfect Wonderful Wife conditioning, the knack for poisoning and subtle manipulation, and the love of fashion, but she has source of solace in-

shauna, from a narrative standpoint, is carlos. she's not cruella's daughter, though. shauna is the daughter of one of cruella's goons (take your pick). on the isle there is a very strong expectation that henchkids become henchmen, and this, of course, does NOT work for shauna shipman and her sixteen different complexes. her dad tries to conscript her into following around and doing cruella's kid's bidding at a young age, and it... does not work for her. she has a violent little outburst and then runs away, living on the street and killing animals to eat for a while. she finds jackie instead. perfect, wonderful, Almost Fit for Auradon princess jackie. they clump together and shauna moves into their castle, under the pretense that she's become jackie's handmaiden. (a princess needs a handmaiden, darling). this chafes too, but with jackie's insistence that it's not true, not their real relationship, not anything tangible, it's a lot easier to ignore. they go to school together everyday at the weird little isle school, and shauna is the top of their class. it's hard for that to feel like it matters, though, when the biggest currency in the outside world is fear and the biggest currency inside is Being Jackie. the resentment still happens and chafes, but it's just simmering. it won't boil over until auradon.

van, from a narrative standpoint, is jay, but she's the daughter of madam medusa from rescuers rather than jafar because. van is so white it could blind you. madam medusa has a junk shop just like she did in the world before the isle, and van spends a lot of her time super athletically stealing for it with a lot of parkour. her mother spends all the time she isn't running the shop collapsed on the couch, just like in van's canon. she doesn't really have anyone her own age until natalie, daughter of maleficent, starts upending the power structures on the island and she decides she wants in. they become fast friends, but it's always "second" and "commander", because van never met a power dynamic that she didn't jump on. they also try their hardest to make things as good as possible for the isle kids in their area, but they refuse to admit that. come on, and look weak? dumb

jackie and shauna end up with nat and van pretty soon after they become a They. natalie wrests control of the taylor castle from jackie's mother and the evil queen refuses to surrender, leading to a bitter siege. jackie and shauna finally come out to try to broker a surrender, but natalie steps on jackie's toes and then jackie turns from Perfect Princess to Top Tier Bitch. and then she's like oh shit oh shit oh sHIT i pissed off maleficent's daughter this is going to be-

and shauna's back here getting her hunting knife out like sure, maleficent's daughter might have magic but if she DIES first then she can't use it- and nat just laughs. boisterous, delighted laughter.

"i think this castle's already got a queen." then she glances over to shauna's no longer concealed knife. "maybe two?" they both blush.

natalie, feared daughter of maleficent, setting the isle into a chaos it hasn't known in more than a decade, holds out a hand.

"Truce?" she asks. then suddenly natandvan becomes natandvanandjackieandshauna and they have half the isle under their collective thumb.

but then the invitation comes from queen charlotte for four children to move to auradon, and suddenly maleficent, who is still the most powerful person on the isle, has a single, itsy bitsy favor to demand from the daughter she so kindly took in after her father's death. who she taught to wield the magic she barely knew existed, who she loved and cherished and fed and clothed-

and a plot to steal the blue fairy's wand and dismantle the barrier is born.

how things go in auradon

natalie is torn between what she feels she owes to her mother and the other denizens of the isle, her friends (who are the most important in this equation), and then her emerging feelings for lottie. lottie who is so kind and who trusts her and is trying so hard for her and her friends, who she's so attracted to but is just using (right, that's all this is? right????) who is trying to make her own shitty society better too.

jackie is finally in the land of the royals and is trying to put all that life training to good use, but it's not... really working. we have something resembling the chad plot with jeff and something resembling the doug plot with laura lee, who thinks that jackie is very kind and deserves to be treated better (though their relationship isn't romantic). shauna is standing at the sidelines and crossing her arms and pouting. fine! if jackie wants to get her heart broken by this dumb auradon boy be my guest! i'll just. go do something else. fuck you

shauna and van both join the tourney team, because it's part of their collective How to Infiltrate Auradon Society and Get Lottie's Good Graces plan. also because shauna is very angry right now and needs a physical outlet and van has been cooped up for too long and is gonna go crazy. they're both good enough to make it and travis is like FUCK YEAH I'M FREEEEEEEE

his dad is very upset about this but shauna and van are way better than him already and it's hard to justify making his son do something the kid doesn't want to when there are better options and the nepotism isn't even wanted.

shauna and javi become friends and she encourages his interest in art like. huh. wouldn't it have been nice to have one singular adult who was nice to me? and then does not examine it beyond that. shauna also befriends tai, who tries to show her all of the things auradon has to offer because shauna is the most obviously Intelligent TM of the isle kids.

van flirts with tai a lot, but neither of them make a lot of progress with that because tai is pretty closeted and van is. not trying as desperately as shauna to try to be acceptable TM here.

by the end of the movie, they all decide that they don't want to use the wand to burst the barrier and talk with lottie about ways to help the other kids integrate over here in auradon instead. lottienat happens first, taivan happens second after van starts to commit to being in auradon and tai starts to commit to Going Against Dumb Auradon Rules like Homophobia (I'M A PRINCESS DAMN IT) and learn more about what's up with her sleepwalking with van and also nat. it takes a really long time for jackie and shauna to work things out because jackie keeps trying to force things with prince jeff and shauna finds better uses of her time and energy than worrying about it, but eventually they come together too. and crystal comes too! and she and misty become besties. and misty does not do any insane things, thnx

[kimwexlers-brownhair]

modern game of thrones/yellowjackets crossover where sansa, arya, and daenerys all go to the same high school. dany is a senior, sansa is a junior, and arya is a freshman. they’re all on the soccer team together and they end up on the plane. how do you think the three girls would cope in the wilderness? how do they get along with the other Yellowjackets girls?

Yay, I'm sober enough to tackle this!

Like Shauna, Sansa doesn't like soccer or really any sports. She joins the Yellowjackets because most of her friends like Jackie, Shauna, Jeyne, Beth, and Mari are on the team and are giving her shit for being such a girly girl. As much as she never learns to love the sport, she gets very efficient at it -- which secretly pisses off Arya, who was on the team first and used it as an outlet for some of her frustrations as an outsider punk Nat type. She's the youngest player.

At first I saw Dany as the team captain, because of course in canon she develops Tai's leadership flair and Jackie's ability to bring people together. But she didn't start that way. She was a shy, miserable girl at the start of AGOT. So I see her as someone who earns the girls' respect because she, like, Arya, uses the soccer field as an outlet and becomes their star player. But nobody actually warms up to her, as she's this ethereal, weird, skittish girl sitting on the fringe of social events, a bit like Misty.

But then the crash!

Sansa, predictably, has a hard time adjusting, just like Jackie. It really takes her awhile to find her place in the group. But like Shauna, Arya gives her a reality check and helps her find things she's good at that are actually crucial to their survival: sewing, picking berries, and rallying the girls with singalongs and stories. Arya helping out her sister improves their relationship, once big sis gets over the shock of her annoying little sis being so mature. She frets every time Arya goes out hunting and prays with Laura Lee.

Jackie starts resenting her for slowly but surely adapting. She'd bonded with Sansa over not being the survivalist type in the beginning of their ordeal, and now here's Stark sewing together blankets and clothes out of the dead bear's fur while singing Alannis Morisette with the group. Prissy little Sansa is better at surviving the wilderness than Jackie, and Jackie can't stand that. It's not long before she starts her passive aggressive routine, and Sansa is pretty crushed. She always looked up to Jackie, similar to how she looked up to Margaery in the show and in the books. That makes Arya really start to hate Jackie's guts, and the two get increasingly nasty with each other.

But the fights never go too far because Dany always steps in. Out in the wilderness she blossoms from a Misty into a Lottie (that sounds denigrating to Misty, and I certainly don't mean to do that. But let's face it, she doesn't quite have the knack of bringing people together. At least not against their will).

Dany's dreams in AGOT are similar in nature to Lottie's visions, so this trajectory makes sense to me. She becomes a spiritual leader as well as a practical one. She kills the bear, she comforts those breaking down, and she inspires people. She makes hard decisions. I don't think she'd go as far as Lottie with the blood rituals and whatnot, as she's also got her eye on the prize like Taissa (the prize being surviving and getting the hell out of there). So I don't see Tai and Nat having as much of a problem with her as they do Lottie, and they're more concerned than upset for her when she starts talking about her visions.

Still, relationships begin fracturing all around them. Sensing the pressing danger, Dany, Sansa, and Arya join up and become the closest team working together, probably along with Tai, Van, and Shauna. It will take a little time for Arya to feel comfortable throwing in her lot with the weird girl who talks about visions of dragons, but she respects her hussle. Romantic, traumatized Sansa goes the Van route of trusting in what Dany sees, although still managing to remain grounded in reality.

Dany will give the go-ahead for eating the dead when the time comes.

All the while, Coach Renly disappears into daydreams about the future he might have had with Loras.

[jollyreginaldrancher]

Yellowjackets S2 e5

Why are they talking about the baby in the recap? Is Shauna gonna give birth soon? Or miscarry? Something is gonna happen with the baby for sure.

The vibes in Van's place are immaculate.

Excuse me, you mean to tell me there were other people in the room while they were having their moment? Like were they unaware that queer history was happening right in front of them, or?

TAI REALLY FELL FOR HER 😅

I could go on about how Van's place/shop indicate she is also stuck in time or regressing like the others but I feel like I've been ranting too long in these posts. It is weird she just threw her bills away though. Almost like she was not planning on staying there long enough for the consequences to reach her. Was she living a nomadic life or was she just about to pack up and move? Or were her problems so bad she was just giving up on them? I dont know. I could analyse that in a million different ways but ultimately I just need more info really.

Speaking of which, I hope the scene continues after the credits. If we have to wait all episode for an update again I don't know what I am gonna do.

Oh we're back to the friggin cabin.

I'm gonna set it in fire 😤

Van's not sleeping with Taissa anymore? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

She woke up unattached to her. Is this her way of breaking things off? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Please tell me she just got up to pee.

Oh thank god they're still together 😅

They're giving me life at the moment so I'm just happy to see them together.

Shauna's belly looks massive for someone who's stranded in the woods with nothing to eat. I feel like there's no way the baby and stomach would get that big.

Honestly let's take a moment to think about how much it would have sucked for Shauna being not only pregnant as a teen in that situation but also her best friend dying and losing any sort of comfort she had from that relationship on top of everything else. Like I can close my eyes and imagine Jackie helping her or snuggling up to her or giving her a massage or whatever cause she was that kind of friend. And now that's gone.

I completely understand why she would go into that shed to talk to her and Tai is fooling herself if she thinks she'd be any better if Van really did die when she got mauled to death.

"happy wife happy life" now you're getting it 😘

Honestly glad Trevor is at the cult therapy session. He needed some anger management and this is the closest thing to that in this scenario.

Did nobody tell Callie that her new friend is a cop or is this a scheme of some sort?

Would it be bad if I just skipped all these filler scenes and just watched the bits that I cared about? This is honestly starting to resemble pretty little liars in a bad way with all the random filler comphet relationships. Like I had to wait through so many Ezra and Aria scenes just to get to the good stuff (Paige and Emily) and it feels like this show is kind of turning into the same thing at this point.

Every interesting scene is intercut with random shit of straight people screwing or married couples fighting and crap like that. We get like one gay scene but we have to sit through 45 minutes of other crap to get to it and it's not fair.

I don't hate any of these characters, they're just spreading the runtime time too thin between too many characters. Cut Callie out completely. Take out a chunk of Shauna and Jeff's stuff, they haven't really been interesting since Adam's death. Even Misty is suffering due to her forced collaboration with that shitty stalker of hers. Nat and Lottie and Tai and Van is where the present day story is at but their scenes are moving along at a snail's pace because they just spend way too much time trying to showcase other characters. Especially when things are really picking up in these other stories. I'm getting whiplash with the way the focus is constantly changing between all these groups of characters.

And I know other shows do it too (Game of thrones, bold and the beautiful, etc) but it's still really frustrating that it's happening here.

At least we're learning a bit about the cards. Though we already heard about them, we never really saw how they used them to divide tasks.

Not Randy 😅 why is he always the go-to for these lies? 🤣

If he hadn't been to taco bell how would he know the beans upset his stomach? He's clearly lying there. Also I still think he is shifty as fuck.

Oh my god we're FINALLY gonna see Van and Taissa interact as adults 🥹

I just know Van is looking at that wedding tape and wishing that was her and Tai 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Van is sharp as a whistle. She immediately hit the nail on the head.

They were together at Shauna's wedding? 🥹 Or at least they were talking and interacting back then 🥹🥹

Please, for the love of God, tell me they got that pretzel 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Just know I'm hanging onto every word Van and Taissa say.

A bunch of other scenes and things happened and I didn't really care because Van and Taissa weren't there and I'm lazer-focused on them at the moment.

Like I love Melanie Lynskey but I didn't even want to look at her straight shenanigans. Just show us the lesbians please and thank you 😭

Crystal and Misty are bonding though and it's cute but it's making me worry that Crystal is going to get killed off soon. They tend to not focus on anybody but the mains and the characters that get killed off and since Crystal only really started cropping up recently I feel it would be naive to assume they were just showing more of the other yellowjackets out of the goodness of their hearts and not just to make us sad when they eventually killed them off.

One thing I did not anticipate is how much I would end up loving these characters...specifically the yellowjacket girls, and even more specifically the lesbians (Shauna, Nat, Van, Misty, and Taissa). I am just so glad all my babies are all alive 😌 and now Van and Taissa can get back together and live happily ever after 🥰

Nothing against Simone but she doesn't get Tai like Van does. And while divorcing would be hard I think it's safe to say their marriage is beyond saving at this point. Not only did they lose love and trust but when your partner actively fears you then you NEED to step away.

Anyway Crystal and Misty are cute -though some of those stories they're sharing feel like something they should be unpacking with a psychiatrist and not a friend- but I am really worried about Crystal...wait, Kristen, apparently.

Oh no. Misty no, please tell me she's not going to tell her about the black box.

Misty nooooo 😭😩 why would you tell her that? Read the room!

I'm honestly getting autism vibes from Misty if I'm being honest. Mostly from the deodorant thing.

Yeah, Crystal is definitely gonna die.

See I don't even want to write RIP because of the obvious joke (rest in poop).

I'm guessing eating Crystal is out of the question. Cannibalizing a corpse is bad enough but cannibalizing a corpse that fell into the poop pit is just beyond the realm of acceptable.

Nat must be on some mission here because up til now she was desperate to escape and I don't think two therapy sessions would have really had that effect on her unless there's a lot more to their relationship in the past that we have yet to watch. Maybe related to that cult stuff. Though with the info we have now it seems more like a rivalry and like Nat is trying to break her cult up from the inside rather than trying to join it. Although cults do have more of an effect on people who fit Nat's circumstances, who are isolated and don't have much of anything going on for them.

I'm lowkey hoping Misty Crystals that William guy that's with her because I don't trust him and I can't stand him and historically her friends don't dare well.

Anyway I'm clueing onto the fact that Misty has some deep seated issues with self loathing and only pursues friendships with people like Nat, who hate her or otherwise look down on her because she can't accept being treated with love and respect as she doesn't feel like she deserves it.

Basically Misty is a masochist and turning away someone who looks up to her (or at least appears to worship her) because she hates herself and doesn't feel worthy of love and this is the way she's stagnated (like all the other girls have) and gotten stuck at age 16.

Honestly the vibe I'm getting is they're all punishing themselves. Nat through drugs, Shauna through sticking it out with Jeff because she feels like she HAS to make it worth basically killing Jackie, Misty through living a life of Loveless was and anonymity where she just cares for other people who would never care about her and Tai and Van by giving up the one thing that kept them while and sane; each other.

Everybody's making a sacrifice.

Shauna/Randy is cracking me up. I forgot he had some useful info he could share with her. Their scene was funny though at least and a break from the usual torture her scenes with her family are.

Is Tai really joining team Lottie or just playing peacekeeper?

Tell me that drug isn't a sign of bad times for Van. Like, I am sure it's a bad omen but just like to me.

I'm guessing painkiller or something like that. Lowkey hoping Van just had some bad injury and needed it, and not that she's addicted to it or needing it to survive.

There's a lot of other similar looking bottles in that shelf though 😭

Like she was watching that wedding video and it looked like she was longing for something. I don't want to jinx it, I'll shut up now 😭😭😭😭😭

When she said the V is for Vicky I thought she married someone named Vicky 😅 but no that's her mom's name. It's horrible she got cancer and died. Isn't it generic though? Van might not be out of the woods 🥺

If she survived all that just to get cancer and die I will kill myself 🙃

Anyway Van is right and has every right to be upset probably. It looks like Taissa was the first one to walk away. I don't know if we'll get more details but that's the vibe that we're getting here. Like it seems like Taissa left her behind and Van has been waiting for her all this time 🥹

TAISSA LOVES VAN CONFIRMED!

THIS IS NOT A DRILL! GRAB YOUR U-HAULS AND YOUR SLEEPING BAGS BECAUSE VANTAI IS A GO!!!!!!!🥹🎉🎊

The gals are holding each other and crying, that's second base in lesbian.

The downside is we have to look at the other characters now. On the plus side I was right about Nat staying behind because she doesn't trust Lottie.

The wild thing is that Lottie did all that and Nat is the one looking insane in that scene. Like, read the room hon, this is a cult, they are self aware enough to know they're in a cult, they just don't care that it's a cult.

Honestly not surprised Shauna is terrified. Who wouldn't be in that scenario? But i feel like the subplot with Misty's friend dying should sort of take precedence over a simple fight. Unless it's not just a fight. I mean it's not like the baby's coming, they can wait a little

I just had to jinx it, didn't I?

Misty trying to save Crystal though was pretty heartbreaking. I thought she would run back to camp and play innocent. She really went all the way around to the bottom of the cliff just to try and save her immediately after threatening to kill her. Like I feel that shows she doesn't really mean to hurt people,

He really sniffed the splooge sponge?!

Misty: I lost Crystal in the storm

Van *is already out the door screaming Tai's name*

Is Shauna gonna give birth in the woods?

Are Van and Taissas's lesbian powers going to help the girlies get back to camp?

Speaking of Tai and Van we're back to the gals being pals. They fell asleep on the couch and Van covered Taissa with a blankie because she's in love with her 😌

There's no other explanation

And then Van painfully took her meds pretty much confirming she's the one that's sick.

You know what, I have decided to stop being a sceptic and lean into the cult stuff. If it cures whatever Vanessa has going on I'd be willing to convert 🥹

The girls are kissing 🥰🥰🥰

It was the other girl and Van but still.

I'm starting to think evil Tai has a widdle cwush on Van because that's twice now she took the chance to kiss her unprompted. 🫢

I want to believe in that "drunk words are sober thoughts" but instead of drunk words it's possessed smooching. I've decided that these two are getting back together and that they will get married and live happily ever after and buy a dog. Specifically a border Collie. They will have a yard and a VHS store and will live to be old. They will sip iced tea on the front porch and Van will be wearing jeans into her 80s. And when they do go it will be peacefully, in bed with each other, holding hands, in their sleep, together 🥹

That's canon now.

Anyway the show is trying to bait me into shipping Lottie with Nat but I've already decided that Nat is secretly in love with Misty so that's not gonna happen.

Maybe there's an AU where they all died. Maybe that universe is the good one.

Is it hunting at multiple universes? Or is the vision hinting at them being dead all along and being in limbo or hell? If Van dies we'll know it's hell.

Or maybe there really was something in the woods and they did bring it with them. Maybe that's why they refused to grow up and why they kept punishing themselves.

Then again maybe that something isn't an evil spirit but mental thing. That's what the sceptic in me would say if I hadn't drowned her when it became obvious that Van is dying.

The lesbian powers DID work! I knew they had some sort of telepathic connection. How else do you explain them constantly finding one another and so on.

Oh Shauna is giving birth to that baby like right now. Fuck the next episode is gonna be spectacular. I'm surprised they didn't hold out til the finale. They must have something bigger up their sleeve for that then. If they fucking kill Van I will be destroyed so hopefully not that though.