#roommate gave me this look of horror 'how the fuck are you doing complex math and elden ring at the same time'

[vermillioncrown]

also the humor in the meta of this game is the best part since the world is such a shithole

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the template messages are a meme themselves

- everything is a "dog" - turtles are "champions" ("therefore don't you dare!") - "you don't have the right" for any entryway that cannot be passed through either bc of a lock or game boundaries ("You don't have the right, O, you don't have the right; therefore, you don't have the right!" "Why is it always you don't have the right?" *despair emote*)

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invasions. I fucking hate getting invaded bc i get sweaty during pvp, but it makes sense as a balancing mechanic for friendly summons so blegh

however there are some hilarious moments

1) my friend CC plays as the nastiest naked gremlin with double scythes and an imp head helmet. he needs to be naked bc he's barely spec'd to carry the weapons and still fast roll.

we were in my world and i get invaded, freak out and immediately back into a corner to protect my back, CC says "verm i'm gonna use the mimic to turn into a box and flank him"

the invader runs in and it's like looking at a mirror of CC, naked double scythe and all. he's gunning for me, and then CC pops out of hiding, invader takes one look at CC and bolts

"i can fight one coward - i can't fight myself" - invader's thoughts, prob

"GET HIM" we both start chasing, lose the invader in a hallway

CC ponders a bit "i know this guy. he thinks like me - HE'S PRETENDING TO BE A BOX THAT'S HIM" and we proceeded to kick the shit out of the fake box and booted the invader

2) normally i'm very shit at handling invaders, and verm bf isn't that great either (so we bolt towards the boss when we summon each other)

after the nth time being invaded i started throwing a tantrum

"fuck you, i'm not fighting" and used the 'spread out' emote to lie like a starfish on top of the grace point (respawn point)

verm bf is telling me to get up, don't give up "babe c'mon please", i've put my controller down and stay on the ground

the invader never manages to find me and ends up leaving after a few minutes

3) CC and i were back fighting this nighttime spawn boss, and bc it's in the open an invader is able to get to us WHILE we're fighting

invader comes in metaphorical guns blazing, sees us getting our shit wrecked -

and uses the 'kneel' emote to sit and watch. it was either a "i'll wait until you're done for an honorable duel" or "lmao the boss is doing my job for me"

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my cocky mouth

CC "man i wonder how that guy died? does someone get pissed at you for taking this item - AAH careful spongebob!" (both of us streaming to each other on discord so we can watch elden ring while we play elden ring)

(he always "careful spongebob"s me bc i just fall all over the place like i'm drunk)

me, riding my horse along a ledge and checking the bloodstain "lol nope he's an idiot that fell to his death, i'm not stupid like -" *immediately, accidentally presses L3 to fast-dismount and launches myself into a ravine*