#roadkill oh my god i'm holding him so gently

[blistering-typhoons]

did- did, my, baby boy pat butcher accidentally assist in a murder?

[ask-thedepressedkidatthetable]

“You have no business looking into my family!” [ alex // casper ]

Angry/Irritated Sentences, Vol. 2

"Okay. I'm sorry." Alex said, his hands gently gesturing downward. "I'm sorry." Had he fucked everything up? He hoped not, but he could see it now: Casper avoiding him, driving wedges everywhere, the whole nine yards of distance. Alex couldn't really blame him either. He'd done the same for so much less and for what? His own mistakes. Whatever Casper was dealing with was serious and completely outside of his experience!

What was he supposed to do? Casper hadn't come back after break, it'd been nearly a month and it scared Alex to no end! He'd learned too much to take the possibility of Casper being killed off the table. 'Ran away,' they said. 'Disturbed.' 'Quiet.' God, he worried about Casper. Justin too. The whole lot of them. The world just wasn't made for people like them. It had been the perfect opportunity too, he'd seen Saffron turn the corner and she hadn't even noticed him! So he followed her as far as he could, and drew up maps and wrote out the huge list of addresses that could possibly be Casper's and it was a gigantic pain in the ass! Oh sure, Mr. Barnes and the buss driver were more than willing to write down his address and hand it off to everyone on a silver platter, but the second he wanted to know anything it became a huge fight!

So he did it himself. He wandered neighborhoods, caught up with the drug dealers on the bus, and one day he got lucky! "Cas, Cas please!" No! He wasn't going to watch them become strangers again! Alex pulled on Casper's hand- hard keeping him from walking back into that house. They were going to settle this now! In the driveway. "Just come back to school! Please?" Whatever was going on, Alex could figure it out! He'd become a different person, he'd take another shape and it wouldn't disturb the delicate balance of their lives. "I miss you! Mr. Barnes misses you. He- he keeps checking behind the door like he's expecting you to pop out at any moment." Did- did Casper get it? It was like a ghost joke! But it was also true.

Casper hadn't returned any of his calls. Was this all too much? Alex stared at Cas's hand. He wasn't sure he wanted to live in a world where he couldn't admit he actually cared about people but . . . .

Alex sighed, letting go of his hand. "I worry about you. It's who I am." Did Casper remember when he offered to listen if he ever wanted to talk? One day, if they had the time, he'd repay the debt he was creating here and tell him what was really going on. But right now it was too hard to say. Roadkill wrapped in plastic. Pathetic nights spent holding the same mug he'd handed Casper the night they met. Jumps- cracks in the night, he thought he had a duty to make sure Casper was alive! To keep him that way if he could.

"I'm sorry. I never meant any harm."