#reblogging again because it's mocks and exams season

[keijikunn]

Yellow

pairing: bokuto koutarou x neutral!reader genre: overall fluffy, there’s this tiny bit of angst but nothing too hurtful  summary: the yellow things in love that reminds you of bokuto koutarou word count: ~2.5k author’s note: happy birthday to my favourite loud boy! i know i’m a bit late, but here it is my special fic to our owl

WARNINGS: mentions of car crash

If you enjoy it please leave a comment or a reblog!!

               a life with bokuto koutarou is painted with yellow. like the sunshine on your skin, a cold lemonade on a hot day, or a smile face on every text exchanged. a life him his was never dull, he just… brings color into it. in all honesty, you were nothing but blessed to have such a great man on your side through the ups and downs of life.

              waking up next to him – with his arms securely wrapped around your waist, his soft breathes hitting your neck and his head on your chest – always filled you utter joy and warmth. even when his lips let snores escape or how his hair would tickle your face, the peace on his features was enough to melt your heart. and when the rays of sunshine illuminated both of you? that was the moment koutarou looked absolutely like an angel – and perhaps he is.

              “good morning, love” his raspy voice has never failed to pull the strings of your heart, the same ones bokuto knew all too well – after all, years of relationship taught him enough about you.

              “good morning, kou” you replied with a quick peck on his forehead, letting a hand run through the locks of gray and black hair. the man let out a content hum as he pulled you even closer, that way he could kiss the soft skin of your neck just the way he knew you liked.

              as odd as it might be, mornings were the only moment bokuto would be the calmest he could. the aura around him would be a pastel yellow. soft, discreet, but lovely. the most tender and loving gestures are exchanged in a half-sleep conscience – but still the purest actions. your own world is filled with such color, your bedroom – despite the blue grey-ish shades on the walls – was a safe haven illuminated with it.

              koutarou, however, wasn’t a simple man. therefore, he hadn’t in himself only one variation.

              bokuto was also as yellow as your highlighters: bright, flashy, but helpful with sort of a guidance within it – just like the actual object. he reminded you of it because of the many sleepless nights both of you spent during your exam’s seasons in college, even though he was not much of a help and his schedule required him to wake up early.

              “I might not be a college student, but I need to hype my significant other” he commented on the first time he stayed up until 3 in the morning with you, sitting on the kitchen table scanning with his eyes through the many pages scattered around. “it’s hard, but I believe in you. and I can’t let you pull an all nighter, you’ll be absolutely shit on your afternoon classes”

              just like that, koutarou would make you company in silence. sometimes he’d fall asleep resting his head on his folded arms over the table, in others he’d try to help you organize what you’ve already been through. and on the top of all of that, bokuto koutarou would ground you whilst your mind you’d be drowning in anxiety and self-doubt.

              the same way you’d highlight important things on your books and notes, bokuto would highlight the best qualities of you. pointing your smartness, beautifulness, gentleness and loving personality. this man would not let you forget how far you’ve come, all hardships you’ve won against and how your future is going to be as bright the yellow pen that you constantly use.

              by himself, kou would be under the spotlight as the great athlete he is. you, however, couldn’t help but give him the focus he deserved. he was inspiring to you, always trying to do better, to be the best version of yourself. in your life, bokuto koutarou was a highlighter, but also something highlighted so you can – and will always – remember his importance and meaning to you.

              there are these certain shades of colors that just don’t look as pretty as others, but are as just important to compose the whole one. like any other people in the world, bokuto also had the slightest ugly tones of yellow.

              the sunset and sunrise can be both renewing and melancholic. the hue that transitions to orange has two different meaning when you’re talking about your boyfriend: can be both the argument and the reconciliation. the contraposition between these two is essential to understand why one color brings two types of feelings.

              “koutarou, you aren’t being reasonable” you argued certain night, it was after a msby game – which his team won. it was a hazy memory to you, everything passed by in a blur. at one time you remembered hugging bokuto as the two of you celebrated the end of the game, then all you could see and hear was him dragging you out of the commemoratory party.

              “how not, y/n?! that guy was fucking touching you” kou’s voice was loud, as he always is, but that volume wasn’t filled with love or excitement; no, all you could hear was angriness and jealousy. “and you weren’t doing a thing to stop him! you acted like your boyfriend wasn’t there”

              “it wasn’t like that, kou!” the scream match wasn’t going anywhere with both of you stressed, with a deep breathe, you held eye contact with him. “I tried to stop him! tetsu saw me pushing his hands from me, but he ignored whatever I did! he still touched me and all I could do is act as if nothing was wrong, or else I’d be the hysterical significant other”

              “c’mon, y/n, you’ve never really cared about what the media would say about you” bokuto mocked as he rolled his eyes, your heart clenched at those words. they weren’t true, how could you tell him about how you felt reading mean comments online? you treasured the bright smile he had, it was enough for you to keep going while receiving those kinds of insults.

              “you know what, koutarou? I’m going to my friend’s house tonight. we are not going anywhere right now” with that, you left your shared apartment with the jacket you were wearing and the cellphone on your pocket.

              leaving bokuto for the night was awfully painful. each day, before you fall asleep, the man’s embrace was like a sunset, a way to conclude your day. the explosion of orange, red and yellow as the sky grows darker was a signal that another milestone was completed with koutarou by your side.

              arguments between you two were exactly like watching, by yourself, the sun hiding under the horizon after having company for so long. it felt wrong, but sometimes it would unfortunately happen, because no couple was perfect. but, what made bokuto and you different from others was the way that always the sunrise would come with closure of whatever hurtful feelings were reminiscent.

              later on the next day, you’ve returned to your home. bokuto’s shoes were organized by the entrance of your apartment – contrary to the other night, when he just took them off and kicked aimlessly. the rice cooker was on, you could even smell the cleaning products you use around the house: an indication that kou did some of the chores you had to delay to attend his game.

              “I’m home” you announced rather quietly, eyes scanning around in order to find your boyfriend. he emerged from the kitchen, a basket full of clean clothes on his grip and a tired expression on his beautiful face. “what… are you doing?”

              “I know you use Friday evenings to do some chores, and since I’ve dragged you to my game you couldn’t do them, so I decided to be helpful at least once” he answered with a small smile. you could tell koutarou was tired – maybe feeling his muscles ache after such an intense game or just because he couldn’t sleep without you. “akaashi gave me the biggest lecture ever to knock some sense into my head, I wasn’t being fair with you”

              “neither was I” the aftermath of every argument between you two would be like this: silently, spoken in whispers and reluctant touches. “I should’ve told you how I truly felt about those online comments… we’re supposed to share our worries, right?”

              “yeah… and I should be more understanding about your fears and insecurities” koutarou placed the basket on the floor and stepped closer to you, a timid hand reaching out for you own, which you obliged quickly. “sorry, love. i had no right in yelling at you”

              “it’s okay, baby” a smile crept on your face, your other hand brushes aside the tip of his hair over his forehead (being at home with kou meant seeing him with his hair down, it was a beautiful sight). “I’m sorry too”

              as your lips touched once again, your own little world, where only you and bokuto were allowed to, was painted with the most beautiful sunrise. because that was what a relationship is: every disagreement ends with a reconciliation, a new day would begin from that. you two learned with a few painful sunsets that, after a fight, the way the sun would come up would be even prettier than the day before.

              the most unusual shade of yellow in bokuto koutarou would probably be the same one as from warning signs. this simple association emanates all worry and fear that lays on the deepest part of koutarou – and you thanked god you don’t usually see it. his emo modes back in high school managed to hide the feelings behind his lack of motivation after many failures in a row; now, he shone bright yellow warning signs every time his heart wasn’t at ease.

              despite of that, no emo mode would have prepared you to see the restless and worried features on bokuto’s face when you opened your eyes on a cold day. all your body hurt as your chest raised and fell from your breathing patter, the lights above you weren’t making the pounding headache of yours any better.

              “y/n, love, how are you feeling?” koutarou asked frantically, needy for answers so his brain could finally calm down.

              “where… am i?” you uttered, the words almost getting stuck on your dry throat.

              “you’re at the hospital, babe” with that information, numerous scenes rushed back to your mind. how you were on the bus on your way home, the way it drifted on the street covered with a thin layer of snow and the side you were sat colliding against a lamp post. “you were on a car crash, do you remember?”

              “yes, sort of…” still a bit confused, you turned your head to completely face your boyfriend. you could tell by the reddish skin around his eyes that he had cried and judging by his clothes – the msby track attire – that he was on a match before rushing to the hospital. “did you finish the game?”

              “are you insane, y/n?” bokuto whined shaking his head, the grip on your heads tightening a bit. “how could I play volleyball knowing that the love of my life was hurt and on their way to the hospital? my coach allowed to leave as soon as the first set was over. when- when he told me you were involved in a car crash, I was so worried that you’d leave me- and seeing you laying on this bed makes everything so much more intense that-”

              “hey, kou” you raised your hand to cup his wet cheeks, the tears once again started to stream from his eyes and that was one of the worst views you’ve had: his yellow eyes dull and watery. that sight would never match the ball of sunshine bokuto truly is. “I’m here, right? I woke up, see? I’m here, holding your face as we speak. the worst have already passed”

              “I was so afraid, y/n…” he confessed quietly, leaning into your touch to ground himself. “I love you lots, babe, I am so damn glad you’re alive”

              “I wouldn’t go anywhere without you, bo… you don’t have to worry”

              bokuto was shining a bright yellow, indicating his wariness and worry, for the rest of the time you spent at the hospital. the big warning sign on his mind was put aside as soon as all doctors assured him you were fine, completely healed after almost a month after the incident.

              even if that shade wasn’t a pretty one that bokuto has in himself, that makes him exactly the man you are head over heels with. he cares for you, he worries for you, he would do anything in a heartbeat just to make dure you were fine. koutarou gave all of him to you when you started dating, just the same way you did to him.

(the yellow warning signs would only appear years later when your first kid got sick for the first time)

              and last, but no least, the most beautiful, breathtaking hue of yellow was the exact one he always shows you: his eyes. the way they’d look at you with such adoration and fondness, like he was screaming with his sight “this person next to me is the love of my life”, “I love you”, “you’re everything to me”.

              this kind of shining yellow summarized koutarou perfectly: the excitement when he’s playing the sport he absolutely loves, the happiness whenever he is around his friends. but, on the top of everything else, the state of being completely – both mentally and sentimentally wise – filled with the purest emotions he could gather. that only happened with you by his side.

              through the ups and downs of adulthood, you and bokuto faced them together as a couple, as best friends, as growing people. as every single day passed by, both of you were completely sure that this situation – you and him against the world – needed to last forever. you two needed to wake up illuminated by rays of sunshine cracking through the curtains of your bedroom; have in each other’s embrace every sunset and sunrise, eve the ugly ones; put every single yellow sign up whenever the other was in danger.

              and the newest thing you added on your mental list like a masterpiece painted by your love was the way koutarou’s eyes shined so bright while kneeling on your knee. you saved in your heart the image of him holding out a black velvet box with the most beautiful ring inside, his hair down – the same way you love – and wearing his pajamas.

              “will you marry me?” that sentence came in a blow, your knees buckling as your arms found their way around his broad shoulders. the tears of joy stained his shirt as you exchanged words of ‘I love you’ and ‘yes’ between sobs and fits of laughter.

              your world was already full of color, but bokuto koutarou happened to make everything brighter and, at last, complete.

[foolishlovebugbaby]

untitled

Summary: when it comes to you, seo changbin will say everything else but those three little words to get his message across- but you’re not complaining.

warnings: kissing

word count: 3.5k

note: it’s 4am, im sick and disoriented from all the paracetamol running through my veins, and I managed to conjure up this very spontaneous and soft and delirious piece because thinking about whipped!changbin makes me all fuzzy. the goal is to get you all fuzzy too- enjoy :) leave a like/reblog/comment so i know whether yall like these kinds of pieces <3

Changbin loves spontaneous food rendezvous at ungodly hours of the night (or, to be precise, morning), which is exactly why you try to remember to keep your phone off whenever you sleep, otherwise you’d be woken from your slumber by a persistent and whiny voice begging you to get tteokbokki and mango juice from the 7-eleven on the other side of town.

That was, in fact, your current predicament because unfortunately for you, Changbin remembers the number to your landline to a T. “Pleasssseee? My treat, and I promise to help you with mechanics afterwards.” He can practically see your annoyed expression behind his eyelids as he peeks at your window from his parked car in front of your driveway. He knows that you desperately need help in mechanics, a subject he prides himself on being unexpectedly good at, and that you won’t be able to resist a tutoring session right before mid-terms. Manipulative, but in an I-just-want-to-see-you-when-are-you-going-to-take-the-hint way.

“I’m suing 7-eleven for their 24/7 policy on the grounds of sleep disruption,” Your sleepy voice softly seethes on the other end and he smiles. “So is that a yes?” He hears shuffling and quiet groans and a fuck, that hurt, before he sees the curtains to your windows open and a very sleepy, angry and disheveled you throwing the middle finger at him. “It’s a fuck you.” He grins. “Take your time, I’ll be here patiently waiting.” He teases and he sees you hang up the phone and stick your tongue out. 

He smiles to himself, already turning the heater on in his car because he knows you’ll complain about it being too cold. He’s done this thousands of times, yet each time you protest he can’t help but find it more and more endearing- your cute whine and messy bed hair and the way you snuggle up in his car seat when you ultimately decide to just come down and get it over with warms his heart like no other. 

Thousands of years from now, when social scientists research teen slang from the 2010’s and they stumble upon the word whipped, Seo Changbin would be the prime study example because dear lord is that boy whipped for you. 

“At this rate i’m convinced you just want to fatten me up and pull some Hansel and Gretel shit come winter,” You get into the passenger seat and put on your seatbelt in all your oversized sweater and sweatpants glory, and Changbin can’t help but wish he was the one keeping you warm. But he supposes his varsity sweatshirt that you wear over your tiny frame would suffice for now. 

“You and your irresponsible ass has barely been eating for the entirety of this exam season,” He pulls out of your driveway and heads towards the main road. “If anything, you should be thanking me for looking after you.” He smiles teasingly at your displeased, sulking face, and he wants to stare longer to admire your cute sleepy features and small frame curled up in his passenger seat but he’d rather not get into a car accident because he knows you’d kill him if the two of you died in a car crash. 

“You’re also the root cause of my sleep irregularities, so thank you very much.” You smile sarcastically at him, and he’d return one right back if it weren’t for the fact that he felt bad about waking you up in the middle of the night. “Is it my fault that I just want to see more of you since school’s been holding you hostage and away from me?” He pouts and sends a puppy eyed look your way, and you huff. “You know you can come over anytime during the week,” You mumble, even though you understand his sentiment. 

It was your last year of highschool and soon enough, the both of you would be whisked away into completely different lives. Time was withering away right before you- heck, you swore you just blinked and autumn was already all around you. It didn’t help that your senior year schedule was practically designed by satan to keep the two of you away from each other. But, as the saying goes, if there’s a will there’s a way, and Changbin’s got the will of a thousand spartans.

“Yeah, but I don’t want to distract you from your study time or steal you away from your family during weekends. So now my nights are reserved for you and only you.” He says pointedly as the car nears the 7-eleven too well-lit for its own good. He doesn’t notice the fact that you bite your lip bashfully at his words. 

“You? Distract me? In your wildest dreams.” You huff, lying through your teeth, and he immediately thinks In my wildest dreams indeed. The amount of times he’s daydreamed about kissing up your neck as you whined about needing to solve a Chemistry question before ultimately being unable to resist the urge to sit on his lap and kiss the life out of him is too many to count, and he coughs the thought away as soon as it comes. “We’re here.”

He pulls up in front of the store, turning the engine off and taking his keys out of the ignition. “Do I have to go inside?” You whine, reclining further into his red pleather seats and snuggling into the Totoro pillow you purposely left in his car for nights like this. He wants to say no, that you and your adorable ass can stay in the car so long as you’re snuggled up next to him while the radio sings in the background, but he’s a coward that’s not ready to have that conversation.

“Yes, now get out of my car before I lock you inside.” You pout and force yourself out of his car.

“So, is it a tteokbokki or steamed buns kind of night?” He quips from beside you as you two walk towards the doors. It’s bloody freezing outside, and Changbin notices you shoving your hands deep into your pockets as you walk a little closer too him. He wants to hold your hands, but his own reroute themselves and open the doors for you instead. “M’lady,” He says and flashes a smile. You roll your eyes at his cheekiness.

Your eyes sparkle under the bright fluorescent white lights inside the store, “It’s a hot chocolate kinda night,” You rush over to the hot drink dispenser and he chuckles at your sheer cuteness. The cashier is half asleep when he greets Changbin, eyes half-lidded and barely standing up behind the counter, and Changbin sends him a small wave.

“Someone’s tired,” He says, pointing out the obvious. “No kidding. You kids are my only customers at this hour.” The cashier manages to get out as he yawns. “Knock yourself out,” He waves sleepily. 

Changbin makes his way for the ‘instant’ aisle, trying to find his beloved spicy tteokbokki pack and some string cheese to satiate his cravings. He crouches down when he spots his favorite brand, ‘Hm, do I want it more saucy or more dry tonight? Decisions decisions…” He thinks to himself. When he finally settles on the less saucy version (of course, because practicality, duh), he sees you emerge from his peripheral vision.

“Got what I need,” You say, left hand carrying your hot chocolate while your arms hold a bag of gummy bears, a carton of mango juice, and a bottle of water while you smile sheepishly at him. His heart is screaming at how cute you look, but his face is mocking you. 

“What was that again about not wanting anything from the store?” He says smugly, and you make a face at him. “Oh hush, you’re paying for it so I thought, why not?” You defend and he laughs, making his way towards you. “Sure.” He teases.

 You stick his tongue out at him and he puts a hand on your shoulder, turning you towards the cashier. “C’mon, let’s get out of here.” 

You two pay for your late-night grabs- well, he pays for everything and you pay with a bright grin and a side hug and a pat on his back (but he’s not complaining)- and he makes his tteokbokki bowl at the designated station before you two walk towards the street bench on the other side of the road. 

“Want some?” He offers cutely, cheeks filled with rice cakes as you swing your bag full of goodies back and forth. “I think I’ll pass,” You say with a smile, your eyes bashfully looking away at his sheer cuteness. You cover up your embarrassment with a sip of steaming chocolate.

“More for me,” He shrugs and you both plant yourselves on the bench. 

The trees shroud around above you both as you overlook the canal, the city completely dark before you. The street lamps are dim and no cars pass on the road behind you, but the pair of you wouldn’t have it any other way. It’s soothing and Changbin wouldn’t trade these moments with you for the world. 

In a flash, he finishes his tteokbokki. “You practically inhaled that.” You say amusedly as he chucks the bowl in the trashcan next to him. “I’m a growing boy, sue me.” He says as he grabs the water bottle in your bag. “May I?” 

“It’s yours, stupid. You always forget to buy one and I always have to pick it up for you,” He smiles at that. “Aw, how cute of you.” He takes a swig and notices your ears turn pink at his comment. “What would you do without me?” You say as a joke but he’s completely serious when he says “I have no idea.” 

You breathe out a chuckle. “Sometimes I wonder how different things will be once we both get out of this town.” Changbin sighs wistfully at that and reclines further into the bench, not liking the idea of leaving at all. 

“Well, I’d like to think that we’d still facetime 24/7, obviously, and I’ll take a drive to your dorm once a week at times like this for a local food trip around your campus town.” His says as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, though his mind runs a mile a minute at the thought of losing you because of distance. He looks into your puppy-dog eyes, and he swears the entire cosmos resides in them.

“Promise?” You stick out your pinky and he intertwines his. “Promise.” 

“Good, because I won’t be able to live without you,” His gut flips at your comment, and you chug down the rest of your hot coco. 

“God, it’s fucking freezing.” You shiver when a gust of wind blows past you. On a chilly November night with absolutely no one around to cringe at his actions, Changbin happily decides to prove to you that chivalry is, in fact, not dead. “You should’ve worn an extra layer, silly.” He takes off his black zip-up hoodie and places it over your shoulders, running his hands over your arms to warm you up. “Better?” He keeps his arm firmly planted around your shoulders, and his face is so close to yours that he can see all your tiny, minuscule freckles in dim lighting. Never mind the fact that he was lowkey freezing in his plain black long-sleeve; he figures holding you close to keep you warm was worth the hypothermia. 

He sees crimson spread across your cheeks like a wildfire, “M-much,” You mumble silently. Maybe it was the fact that your eyes twinkled up at him in the moonlight, or the fact that your face was so close to his he could almost kiss you, but Changbin’s heart starts palpitating and skipping beats all at once as he thinks to himself, god, i’m in love with you. Ofcourse, he doesn’t say this out loud. But in another world where he isn’t a coward and timing was on his side, he likes to think that he wouldn’t let you forget it. 

He doesn’t know that butterflies swarm your insides and that you think to yourself, I think I’m in love, and that the combination of his intoxicating scent and the way he looks at you as if you were his entire world makes you woozy and weak in the knees. It’s frustrating, really, how two people could be so silently in love with each other and not say a thing. 

But tonight was the Night of Nights, and before he knew it, Changbin began leaning closer to you. He doesn’t know what’s taken over him, but he doesn’t do anything to stop it. Because there you were, the girl of his dreams a mere inch away from his lips looking as beautiful as ever, about to be whisked away from him in a few months. Screw it. 

His eyes are half-lidded as they flicker between your eyes and lips, and yours mimic his. It’s so agonisingly slow, but the moment he feels your lips on his, all his worries melt away. Your lips are cold but impossibly soft against his own, and it makes his body erupt in tingles all around. Something cheesy like fireworks, but maybe a grenade going off would better describe how his insides feel.

He doesn’t want the moment to end, but you pull away slowly and rest your forehead on his, eyes shut and teeth clamped on your bottom lip. 

You don’t know why you pull back, and you immediately miss the feeling of his lips on your own, but Changbin assumes the worst. Fuck, maybe that was uncalled for, his heart sinks to the ground and he nervously chews down on his lip. “Let’s get you home,” He says dejectedly, pulling his forehead away from yours and your sorry eyes meet his. He retracts his arm around your shoulders and stands up, wanting nothing more than for the ground to swallow him whole, and you follow him silently to the car. 

The drive back is anything but comfortable- the air between the pair of you is stiff and and suffocating and every synonym for awkward and you wonder why the hell you pulled away because you know your heart wanted to remain on that roadside bench, kissing him until the sun rose. But you’re stupid, so instead you sit in his car while he silently drives you back home, and every passing minute is another minute away from his lips. 

Wordlessly, Changbin pulls into your driveway and his heart sinks down further to the earth’s core. “Sorry for tonight.” His voice is barely above a whisper and his eyes refuse to look at you, which breaks your heart. You want to ramble and say that it’s a misunderstanding, that you have so many bloody feelings for him, but the words get caught in your throat. 

“Changbin?” Is all you manage to get out. He still doesn’t look at you, not because he hates you but because he hates himself for acting on his feelings, and instead looks at his lap. Words weren’t going to get you anywhere, you decide, and you suck in a breath. You reach over and grab his face. Here goes nothing. 

You kiss him this time, a lot more harder than before, and Changbin swears he’s dreaming. Like, he’s waiting for pigs to fly around in the background and for The Walters to appear in your driveway singing ‘She’s Going to Leave You’ because he can’t fathom a world in which you like him back. But none of those things happen, and you’re still kissing him with so much passion and certainty that he figures even if it were a dream, he’ll take it. 

His lips move in sync against your own and makes sure that everything he’s ever held back is poured into this moment. The kiss earlier was in the spur of the moment, but this- this is completely intentional. Maybe that’s why you pulled away. The thought of a kiss between you both simply being just that- a kiss and nothing more. That in the morning neither of you would acknowledge it ever happening. You needed some type of confirmation that things were real; thank the stars you got what you were looking for. 

His hands rest on top of yours and he brings you closer, needing more of you and your touch. But the compartment in between you both is a literal cockblock and he wants to rip it out just so he take you into his arms completely. He’s delirious, and he blames you. 

“Want to come in? It’s a lot warmer in my room,” You say through soft breaths, the wind completely knocked out of your chest and Changbin places soft pecks from the corner of your mouth to your chin. “I don’t mind.” 

It doesn’t take much for either of you to get out of his car and for him to lock it behind you. His adrenaline is rushing and he just wants to hold you and kiss you again, but goddammit, you’re fumbling with your keys not knowing which one is which thanks to the absence of lighting on your front porch- it doesn’t help that he’s decided to plant his hands firmly on your waist as he lightly kisses down the nape of your neck. Fuck you, Seo Changbin. 

The door finally opens after what feels like an eternity, and you make it a point to turn around and shush him. “My parents are asleep,” You look at him with alarmed eyes and he raises his hands up. “I can be quiet, but no promises.” The nuance in his statement makes you blush and he sends a cheeky wink your way. You’re mid eye-roll when he grabs your wrist and heads towards your staircase. 

You’re both clumsy and haphazard as you walk up the stairs, almost tripping and Fuck, I stubbed my pinky toe, but you both fortunately make it up to your room in one piece. Changbin’s heart is beating so fast that he’s genuinely worried you’ll feel it against your palms when you place them over his chest- and you do, by the way- but you’re leaving sweet kisses against his neck that the prospect of dying from cardiac arrest doesn’t scare him because atleast he’ll die happy. 

“So, mechanics later?” He says panting, forehead against yours as he has you between him and your door, thumbs rubbing circles against your waist underneath his sweatshirt and jacket. “Totally,” You tiptoe and kiss him again. 

You taste so sweet against his lips, and at first he thinks it’s the lingering taste of hot chocolate, but he’s come to the conclusion that it’s just because it’s you. His adoring, sweet girl that he takes on midnight food runs because he’s afraid of missing her. The girl that can make his gut flip and mind scramble with a smile. It’s cheesy, and you’re slightly lactose intolerant, but it’s the entire goddamn truth. 

His jacket suddenly claims domain on your floor and you both kick off your sneakers, never pulling away from each other, and suddenly your bed feels a little warmer than last night. He kisses down your neck, something he’s always wanted to do, and you run your hands through his hair. Insane isn’t enough of a word to describe the way he’s feeling, but the search for a word that can encompass all his rampant thoughts would have to wait. 

“You’re the best part about my day,” He whispers into your neck, and you sigh with closed eyes at the feeling. You bite back a smile “I know,” 

“I know? I know-?” He pulls back, half-joking and half-serious, and you’re giggle while you run your hands over his torso. “Yes, I know,” You leave a kiss on his jaw, “And you’re my favorite part of the night,” He’s obviously the favorite part of your entire life, but that statement would have to do for now. He nods his head, “I’ll take it.” and goes back to kissing you. 

Those three daunting words stuck in his throat- and, frankly, yours- make themselves out of his mouth in different ways because perhaps saying them verbatim would shake his entire world, and he’s not sure why he’s scared because he knows you’d say them back. So instead, through voices barely above a whisper and warm hands running along your body, he tries to show you what those three words really mean to him. He’s sleepy and delirious and he’s honestly convinced he’s dreaming, but it’s the greatest thing to ever happen to him. You are the greatest thing to ever happen to him. You both could come up with a title some other time, he concludes, because kissing you is of the utmost priority to him at 2AM. 

Labels were overrated, anyway.

[astharoshebarvon]

Ship Game

I was tagged by  @eb-byestelle . Thank you dear !

First of all, why? I can’t just choose ten pairings. I feel as if I am betraying my other favourite pairings. I love them as much as the ones I’ve mentioned. But nothing I can do about it.

Well, here we go.

Shipping and Fandom Ask

Embrace your inner shipper! Answer questions about your favorite ships or fandoms. Reblog to participate and let your ship flag fly!

1.What are your top 10 manga/anime ships of all time?

Top 10 anime/manga:

1. Maria sama ga miteru / Marimite/ Maria watches over us : Shimako and Sei 

2. Inuyasha : Inuyasha and Kagome Higurashi

3. Tsubasa reservoir chronicles : Sakura and Syaoran Li /Clone Sakura and Syaoran

4. Tokyo Babylon, X   : Seishirou and Subaru

5. X : Kamui and Fuuma

6. Cardcaptor sakura / TRC : Yukito and Touya

7. Junjou romantica : Nowaki and Hiroki

8.  JR : Misaki and akihiko

9. Akatsuki no Yona : Yona and Hak

Vampire Knight : Kaname and Yuuki

3.What gif or screenshot most sums up your ship?

Well, I choose yume for this and the above two images represent their relationship pretty well. They are my favourite illustrations and one can actually see the love they both have for each other. It’s like no one else matters. You can actually see the tenderness in their eyes, how much they care for each other.

4. Describe your favorite ship in seven words or less. 

InuKag : they were born for each other.

Sei and Shimako : sensitive couple. Adorable and sweet.

Sakura and Syaoran : love that transcends time and space.

Touya and Yukito : meant to be together in every world.

Seishirou and Subaru : they are meant to fall for each other.

Kamui and fuuma : just admit you love each other.

Akihiko and Misaki : meant to be together.

Nowaki and Hiroki : sometimes second love is true love.

Yona and Hak : always there for each other.

Kaname and Yuuki : eternal lovers.

6.What’s your go-to episode or scene when you need ship feels?

Well, this one is difficult because there are tons of scenes which I love but I’ll do my best. 

Inuyasha and Kagome :

When Naraku reveals who he is for the first time in ep 21. Any episode with Koga, that really shows inuyasha’s jealousy. The movies…god. First and second movie. All scenes I guess.

Sei and Shimako :

Season two episode 6. Though there are scenes in many episodes of season 1 too.

Sakura and Syaoran :

When Yuuko gives them new bodies and real syaoran is born. In the beginning when sakura is planning to tell she loves him but in the end couldn’t. When syaoran fights kamui. When Syaoran is killed by his son and his greatest regret is that he couldn’t hear those words. I guess I should stop. At this rate I am going to end up with an essay.

Touya and Yukito/Yue :

When touya gives his power to yue. I ship yue and touya and yukito and touya. The last scene in original cardcaptor sakura manga where they are together in the kitchen. When touya corners yukito in school, he knows something is up.

Seishirou and Subaru :

Of course the scene in which seishirou dies. Goddammit. I can’ t think about it. Subaru loses his senses [ in Tokyo Babylon] when seishirou’s eye is gouged out. This is getting too painful for me. I’ll stop.

This pairing reduces me to tears. They belong together. They should’ve been together with hokuto and kakyou.

Kamui and Fuuma :

Little fuuma helping little kamui in one of the extras. Well, just read X. The whole thing is unresolved sexual tension between the two. The creators said it themselves they are soulmates, I mean even in TRC one can see there is something going on between them. Subaru and seishirou is blatantly obvious.

Misaki and Akihiko :

When haruhiko kidnaps misaki, when akihiko comes to pick up misaki from his brother’s house, the train scene. There are many scenes especially the ones with Ijuiin Kyou.

Nowaki and Hiroki :

Again, there are many scenes. The library scene. Goddammit. It reduces me to tears every time. When hiroki spies on nowaki, then sends him flowers. Aww. Just remembering them brings a stupid smile to my face.

Yona and Hak :

Episode 24 of the anime, in manga when that festival happened in one of the villages and yona danced in the village garb. There are many scenes throughout the manga.

Kaname and Yuuki :

Well, volume 11 and 12 scenes. Then the scenes after yuuki sees kaname’s past, end of volume 13 and beginning of volume 14, all the scenes in which yuuki says she needs to go to her kaname. When yuuki takes kaname’s blood after being awakened. There are many scenes.

7.What song or songs remind you of your favorite fandom, character or ship?

Hmm, as such no song in particular.

I did read a fanfiction though which had, “I am watching you” for seishirou and Subaru and I couldn’t help but find it hilarious.

And I think, A Thousand Years by Christina Perri suits yume. It’s true after all.

  8. If the creators of your favorite fandom asked you to write the ship canon-confirmation episode, what will you write/how will it happen? 

Hmm. Well, I hope yuuki gets reincarnated somehow and she and kaname live a long happy life together. Maybe kaname is going somewhere and he bumps into a girl, who has long brown hair and when they look at each other he realizes it’s the girl from his memories. And that’s it. After that kaname never sees the butterfly familiar because yuuki is with him now.

X is never gonna end but I always had a feeling that both fuuma and kamui would die. Because fuuma said that only kamui can grant his wish. They both die.

Then they are shown together in another alternate universe.

I always thought fuuma and kamui suffered equally. You cannot weigh their suffering. Fuuma lost everything because kamui made one choice. Their story is too tragic. 

I’ll come back to this question later.

9.Do you prefer to indulge in (consume or create) fanart or fanfic of your favorite ship? 

Sometimes I sketch and I create edits for my favourite series. And I enjoy seeing fanarts and manga colourings. I write fanfictions too. I love reading fanfictions.

10.Smut or fluff? (VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION xD) 

Both. Both. I love both.

11.What ship are you embarrassed to admit you like? 

Not one. They are all great ships. Nothing to be embarrassed about. 

12.What task are you most likely to procrastinate so you can indulge in your ship or fandom? 

I sacrifice my sleep sometimes. That’s about it. 

13.How many hours of the day do you spend reading fanfic or looking at fanart or other media? 

When there is nothing to do, quite a lot of hours. But when exams are there, I see how the preparation is. But I usually spend quite a lot of time on it.

14.How many memorabilia’s do you own of your favorite fandom or ship (clothes, plushies, etc.)? 

Well, I’ve got lots of volumes of each series and artbooks too. And I’ve also got drama CD’s of some series and magazines. 

15.If you could own one authentic item from your favorite fandom world, what would it be? 

Hmm. Not anything in particular.

16.What fandom have you found to be too toxic to deal with?   

Ah. The best question. Well, I haven’t been in inuyasha fandom but I know it’s pretty weird because for some bullshit reason kagome is shipped with sesshoumaru and inuyasha is portrayed as a person who violates her. Yikes.

Now, I have got nothing against shipping characters who aren’t together. I do that a lot but when the same people come onto inuyasha/kagome and sesshoumaru/kikyo fanarts and spout shit, well I get angry then. Because I adore sesshoumaru and kikyo. It doesn’t happen but I still like it and it has the most gorgeous fanarts ever.

If sesskag and rinsess, which is weird no matter how it’s cut, shippers come and say this would’ve been better if it was sesshkag  fanart / fiction, well I get angry then. Sesshoumaru is my favourite character ever and I really don’t like seeing people think he only belongs with sesskag shippers. What the hell?

He is no one’s property. The only character he remotely showed something for was Kagura. And I am not gonna open Sesshoumaru and Rin thing. That is....well. Let’s just leave it.

Clamp fandom. I dunno…I am not particularly in it but I read some comments on some sites and it’s pretty annoying when some people say you must acknowledge kotori and kamui thing.

Sorry, there was no thing.

Kotori was obsessed with kamui. Did she deserve to die. Hell no. But kotori and kamui just doesn’t exist. I mean the creators themselves said : don’t call kamui and fuuma brothers. No. They are soulmates. Fuuma is all what kamui thinks about. Even in colour illustrations which shows the group, Kotori is always seen glomping kamui like some weird obsessed fangirl. It’s disconcerting. Kamui is always shocked or surprised. Well, whatever kamui and fuuma belong together.

And now the most toxic fandom. Vampire knight. I stopped posting in the tags quite a while back because I am just tired.  I’ve had enough.

Zeki shippers : unable to accept yuuki loved kaname way more than she loved zero. It’s blatantly obvious if you read the manga. But the shippers are not only rude but they also get personal and insult the blogger. They mock the other shippers and keep on ranting and raving about abuse and whatever nonsense that was prevalent in the forums between  2010-2014. Now the same thing happens here on tumblr.

Zeki shippers are unable to accept that not everyone worships zero’s character. Honestly, I never hated zero. I was always like, I want kaname and yuuki together, zero can be with someone else. But his fans and shippers are just nasty. I’ve never encountered a single decent member of this ship. They are rude and insulting and love to send anon messages.

18.Do you have or would you consider getting a tattoo depicting your favorite ship or fandom? 

Nope. Not fond of tattoos.

19.What is the strangest thing you’ve done to honor your favorite fandom, ship or character?

Nothing.