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#random but oh my on words i realize i'm often like this HSKFJSJFJS
noxtivagus
ยท
2 years
Text
INTERPRETATION YES THATS THE WORD I KEEP ON FORGETTING
#๐.rambles
#that is so random but
#ok honestly i've been feeling rather empty n apathetic ever since last night but
#thinking abt creative stuff helps n
#random but oh my on words i realize i'm often like this HSKFJSJFJS
#when i was like. i can't rmb what grade but before i was 7 or smth i rmb
#one of my fav words was 'silence' IDK WHY IT WAS RLLY COOL FOR ME AS A KID N
#one memory i have v clearly is in the bathroom of that school bcs
#that was the only time i celebrated my bday at school omg so
#anyways i'll keep this bit short but hi random story i remember just shouting 'silence' when i remembered the word all of a sudden
#idk why.. im like that with words... >_<
#thinking abt that makes me remember the times i wld just search for hours for words n skim through dictionaries n stuff like that n
#names! yes names i wld search for names for my ocs for hours oh my god
#i'm very dedicated to. my passions like that. in a way aaaa
#i rmb searching names w meanings of 'dark' 'night' 'sky' blah blah mythology too n angel names
#i also remember often getting distracted n reading myths n wikis n searching of so much other info too
#anyways i was just listening to music n i have these images in my head
#i wld very much like to draw them :< but as much as i loved painting as a kid i never rlly had the chance to properly cultivate that
#into a skill ig. but thinking about it i loved painting so so very much i've always loved colors
#speaking of colors this is very random but today i'm wearing a top that is not black! wow! (it is white)
#i've been feeling kinda dead lately but my. mind. my creativity n my analysis n wtvr that keeps me so so alive
#thinking abt sciences n stories n uhh knowledge in general n expressing myself through different forms of art
#I REALLY WNA LEARN HOW TO DRAW T_T & i shld rlly play the piano again
#i shld probably learn the guitar first bcs we have one here too but goddamn i want to learn the violin so bad
#i have a certain fondness n affection for elegance. goddamn i wish i at least tried out ballet as a kid aww
#hmm another random thought but ig one reason why im so disappointed in myself is bcs ik i can do so so much better
#& i used to be so much better as a kid yk i used to be the type that you'd probably brag abt. maybe say things like oh what a waste that
#she's so shy or smth. idk. anyways i have regrets but i try so hard to just be enough for myself
#THAT SAID HOLD UP I RAMBLE SO MUCH AAAAA
#wait i will continue this in another post bcs i have sm i want to talk abt
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