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#punyeta ka
fishareglorious · 2 months
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WHAT HE FUCK DO YOU MEAN SHE''S THIRTY EIGHT. GRETA HOFMANN SHOULD NOT YOUNGER THAN FUCKING SHAMANE I WILL END IT ALL TONIGHT
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themagical1sa · 1 year
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babygirl nakakapagod maging pilipino sa administrasyong 'to
kingina niyong lahat
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claviclez · 2 years
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Ooohhhh nothing grates my cheese more than a filipino-american who identifies as conservative commenting on local politics with the tact and grace of a fucking stereotypical white man. I know it may be hard to believe these days due to the global recession but it is literally STILL free to shut the fuck up.
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fr0stbearer · 2 months
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wtfnari · 2 years
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what did i do and why isnt he reading it yet it's been almost 4 hrs (paalala ko lamang sayo self, wlang kayo kaya wla kang karapatan magtanong kung bakit siya ganto sayo)
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agendabymooner · 1 year
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pag-ibig, traducido (love, translated) || cs55 fic
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carlos sainz x ofc (filipino!content creator!ofc)
EXTENSION TO RIDE HOME
Summary: Magdalena ‘Magda’ and Carlos Sainz can bring the two worlds together through words and actions. OR, moments in which the Filipino woman and her Spanish husband learned to love each other while learning more about what they know about themselves. 
Content warning: Use of explicit language, shitty Tagalog/Filipino and Spanish translations, a lot of Spanish colonial and Filipino history jokes, parental abandonment, brief reference to religious and cultural practice (weddings), mentions elopement, secret marriage, briefly mentions PR relationships/girlfriends, time skipping, what is beta reading lol
Note: The last part of this story is loosely based on the idea given to me by @clairalle and the song 'Paninindigan Kita' by Ben&Ben so thank you so much! ❤️
Letting you all know that some Filipino dialogue here are translated based on how I know it in both English and Tagalog language??? And also, there are some words in here that are the same in context BUT written in two different spellings - some of the words are spelled based on phonics or how it sounds. Enjoy xx
masterlist
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i. 2016 — shit, ayos ka lang?
Ramona Magdalena normally had the patience for Tesco. She wasn’t sure what it was, but everything had her seething with no apparent reason. She tried to figure out what went wrong. 
It was only 3 p.m., for goodness sake! 
Her third year at the university was supposed to make things easier, but the way she clenched at the handle of her shopping cart as she sped through the aisles of Tesco showed nothing of the sort. 
She was so tense, her jaw clenching as she asked herself repeatedly if there was an actual reason for her getting worked up over something. 
Her mother, Alma, was being herself; she was merely calling to see how the university was for Magda. Alma only told Magda about her cousins in the Philippines and how they were looking forward to getting the “balikbayan” box in August, only for the younger woman to respond grumpily. Alma was a dear— so clearly Magda’s grumpiness had nothing to do with her mother’s daily check-in. 
She appreciated her mother’s efforts to keep up with Magda’s well-being; after all, Alma did everything she could as a single parent who immigrated to the UK long before she took Magda. 
So no. She loved her mother so much that she wouldn’t get unreasonably cranky towards her. Not easily, at least. 
But her questions withered away when her speed walking was interrupted by her shopping cart crashing into a figure. Her eyes widened, and she shook herself out of her thoughts. 
“Mierda!” Shit! An accent escaped out of the man’s mouth. 
Now, Magda had been a citizen of the UK for a while now— she knew when to speak English and how to utilize her vocabulary in a reasonable manner. But everything seemed to be in panic mode as she exclaimed, “Shit! Ayos ka lang?” Are you okay?
The man was still groaning, bent over as he clutched to his stomach. He glared at her for a moment as he asked, “¿Por qué no observas a dónde vas?” Why can’t you watch where you are going?
“Hah?” She cocked her head slightly. She only picked up on the first two words. Por qué? Why? 
He’s Spanish, Magda deduced. She stepped away from the cart and walked towards him, “I’m so, so, so sorry! I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going—“
“Obviously—“ he muttered hastily, still touching his aching side. 
“I’m also in a rush, and I’m so frustrated and tired. Three years into adulthood and I can’t make shit right,” Magda hadn’t even realized that she was ranting to a stranger as she rambled, “GCSE clearly didn’t do shit to me because I’m still here bitching about what to cook— punyeta naman kasi, ‘di ba.” What the fuck, am I right?
He stared at her for a moment, not even interrupting her as she spoke. But the silence made Magda pause as her face flushed red, earning a soft smirk from the man. “Mama said I have a problem with speaking too much without thinking.” 
He chuckled at her rambling before sticking his hand out, “We can call it… truce— I think is the word?” 
“Yeah, okay, truce,” she reached out and introduced herself while shaking his hand, “I’m Magdalena.” 
“I’m Carlos.” 
“So, like… you’re Spanish, right? Or do you just speak Español? I’ve only picked up on some words because they’re quite similar— or I suppose I learned it through some song from years ago.” 
“I am actually Spanish; good guess. And you said puñeta— I can assume you also speak Español?” 
“Oh, hah, about that— no. That’s not spoken in Spanish. That’s— yeah, that’s something.” 
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ii. 2017 — irog means love
“Ate Magda! Totoo ba?” Is it true?
“Jowa mo galing Spain?” Your boyfriend is from Spain? 
Magda almost died laughing as she FaceTimed her cousins, who were certainly supposed to be asleep at this time. The Philippines was seven hours ahead, and with her cousins being awake at two in the morning, she could assume that they had a holiday. Everybody always sleeps in if it’s a long weekend or a national holiday. 
But she hadn’t expected their night to be spent gossiping about Magdalena’s boyfriend, Carlos. 
“Niño, bakit ‘di mo gamitin yang utak mo sa school kaysa sa jowa ko?” Why don’t you use your brain for school instead of my boyfriend? Magda huffed out her laugh, making her other cousin Paloma laugh next to Niño. Paloma’s laughter caught Magda off guard as she called out, “Oi, Lomi, don’t be laughing— ikaw ang nagpasimuno nito. Akala mo ‘di ko alam?” You started this. You think I didn’t know?
“Papa brought it up,” Paloma defended herself with a cry, “he kept calling you a national hero, and I had to ask why.” 
“Ano ba naman ‘yan,” what the hell. Magdalena cried out as her head slumped against the couch, raising it to look at her cousins on the screen, “Tell your papa to keep his mouth shut. I love Tito Gerry— I do, but he needs to stop making jokes about that.” 
“—About what?” Magda seemed to be more drawn towards her uncle’s joke that she hadn’t heard her boyfriend enter her flat with a curious look. He had just arrived from Milton Keynes, and this was a surprise as he normally arrived later than this. 
Carlos had taken off his shoes and placed his bag down, walking around the couch to sit next to Magda as he pecked her lips. “Hello, cariño. How was your day?” 
“Hm, good! I’ve finished my paper,” Magda grinned. 
They were so caught up with each other that the only thing they heard was gagging from the phone that the Filipino woman held. Magda and Carlos peered down on the screen as they watched the two teens exaggerate at the sight of the couple being too sweet for each other. 
“Reparations,” Paloma gagged jokingly, “but at what cost?” 
“Matulog na nga kayo!” Go to sleep! Magda exclaimed.
“Okay po, master,” Niño rolled his eyes before waving at the camera, “nice meeting you, Carlitos!” 
"You're Niño, right?" Carlos grinned as he kept his face in front of the camera before waving, "Nice meeting you too!"
“Yeah! Buenas noches, Don Carlos!” Good night, sir Carlos! Paloma giggled, the other side of the call abruptly ending before Magda could berate the pair even further.
She sighed heavily and tossed her phone aside, giving her boyfriend a look of despair as he giggled at her. 
“What did they mean by reparations?” He asked her, genuinely curious at what they were joking about. 
How was she going to explain it to him? Did they even teach at Spanish schools about their country’s history of colonialism? Magda didn’t have an answer to that. 
“Oh, just you know…” She mumbled, “Filipinos were originally Spanish people living in the Philippines. Apparently, dating you made us a deadly combination. Enemies to lovers, or whatever trope that is.”
“Reparations? Oh… OH!” Carlos exclaimed in realization, earning a nod from his girlfriend as he murmured, “Okay.” 
“Okay?” 
“Yeah, I understand now, mi corazon.” 
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“Irog,” Carlos said aloud, making Magda hum in a questioning tone. “Irog, bébé.”
“What’s that, bé?” Magda asked mindlessly as she stared at the screen of her computer. 
Carlos turned his head in her direction as he said, “I don’t know. You’re the one who speaks the language.” 
She paused from doing her work, looking up at him before she pondered the first word he brought up. Then she let out an ‘ah’ before nodding. 
“So…? What does that mean?” Carlos asked. One year of relationship and his thirst for knowledge was an obvious factor that came with it.
“It means mahal,” Magda answered, remembering the word. She continued to read Filipino literature as she grew, not wanting to stay away from it regardless of the fact that she spent her last school years in a British school. She asked her mother questions whenever she didn’t have a single clue what a word meant, so this was a helpful thing to do, especially now that Carlos continued to ask her to teach him how to speak her language. 
“Mahal, like expensive?” Carlos asked for clarification. 
Magda shook her head, “No, not that mahal. Like mahal— you, mahal.” 
“Oh,” Carlos let out before he reiterated what she said, “mahal, like love?” 
“Yes, mahal,” she snickered quietly, calling him by the term of endearment. “Like love.” 
“So irog means love?” 
“Yes, bébé. Irog means love.”
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iii. 2018 — patata, patatas. what’s the difference? 
“Oh! Hey, Mr. Alonso, you’re here just in time,” Magdalena grinned. The older man, who just arrived, shot her a confused look as she stood there with her lips spread out to a grin.
“Magda, hija, call me Fernando. It’s also nine in the morning,” Fernando Alonso sighed quietly, his hand running through his face as he looked back at the girl in the white McLaren shirt. “I think it’s too early for your optimism.” 
“You’re right,” Magda’s shoulders slumped, and her smile fell, her face showing nothing but defeat as she walked towards the Spaniard, “but don’t let my sadness get in the way of your duties today. My supervisor said that you have to do your filming for the next two videos of the channel— and you cannot, I mean CANNOT, back out this time.” 
“I can’t,” Fernando smirked playfully, “or can I?” 
“Mr. Alonso, with all due respect,” Magda sighed heavily, “I started this year. And if you continue to ditch your duties because I cannot convince you enough then I’m going to have to leave not of my own will. I did not last four years at the university just so I can have a manchild act so sassily at the person who’s merely trying her best, so please—“
“Calmaté, Magdalena. Are you okay?” Calm down. Fernando asked, reiterating his question and emphasizing the word you. 
Magda had anything but an answer; her lips pursed as she shook her head. “Can I… shit. Sorry, can I be excused for a moment? It's been a morning for me.” 
“Take all the time you need, querida,” Fernando told her with a smile, patting her on the shoulder as she gave him a grateful look before she walked out of the McLaren garage with a heave of sigh. 
Fernando Alonso pursed his lips as he caught sight of the young British reserved driver, calling him with a whistle as Lando Norris looked in his direction with a questioning expression.
“Norris, you know Carlos Sainz, yes?” Fernando asked.
“Uh, yeah,” Lando replied with a nod. “He’s a friend of mine.”
“Do me a favour, if you don’t mind,” Fernando requested, “will you please tell him Magdalena’s on break?” 
“Yeah, of course,” Lando obliged before his curiosity got the best of him as he asked, “Is she alright?” 
“I think McLaren broke her.”
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“Leche,” she swore quietly as she stood behind the McLaren motorhome. Thankfully, nobody else was there to witness her on the verge of breaking down. Otherwise, that would have been embarrassing. 
She had a bad habit of pleasing people. Living in the Philippines, with her mother working overseas and her biological father being a dickhead fuck knew where Magdalena grew up wanting to appease her friends and family. Her immediate family cared very little about the achievements she reached — they were proud, sure, but how she got there was beyond what they wanted for her.
Some kids who grew up in a Filipino household aimed to please, and Magda wasn’t an exception to that. She, however, did more than what she should have been doing. All thanks to the father she had never interacted with before or ever.
Much like now. She aimed to please. Maybe that was why she got to this predicament now; crouching with her head down as she tried to keep her composure. 
She knew that everyone would kill to be in her place— working for a racing team. But for some reason, her urge to please was replaced by her fear of discomfort and disappointment. Being in a relationship with a Formula One driver taught her a lot about the sport, and she landed herself a job in a team based in England.
Being able to travel with him was a plus, but she felt that she had disappointed him. She didn’t feel as good as he told her she would when she first announced McLaren’s offer to hire her for the season. 
Was this what most Formula One wives and partners felt? Or have they embraced that lifestyle long before the drivers became so popular? She wouldn’t make a good girlfriend for everyone should they find out that she had nothing but anxiety in her system as she graced the grid with her presence. 
She was a disappointment of a Carlos Sainz fan.
His cologne lingered in the air as she witnessed him crouch down in her level, his fingers pulling her hair tie off her head, letting her long dark brown hair fall as she smiled grimly. 
He was in his Renault fireproof, his race suit hanging off his waist. He made things more angelic than normal, and she loved him so much for it. His lips pursed as his fingers continued to massage her scalp. 
“Few more months, mi vida,” Carlos murmured, his soothing voice making her feel at home. “You’re doing so good for them. Don’t let them say otherwise.” 
Sure, she could be at the hotel with Ben&Ben blasting on her phone and her figure crying in the bathtub. She could be falling into the deepest depth of her sadness, but with Carlos ditching his team before the free practice — she would rather be here than be in their shared hotel room. 
“Now c’mon, mi corazon,” he pulled her up, “I’ve managed to get my manager to come drop off some pancit to the motorhome from the hospitality.”
“Pancit?” 
“Malabon,” Carlos beamed at her, pressing his lips to her forehead. “One of the caterers gladly took my request to have some pancit malabon at the menu. It took them a couple of weeks until they finally got tired of my constant asking.”
“Hm, you’re the best, my love,” Magda told him lovingly. “Though, I prefer palabok, remember?” 
“Eh,” Carlos paused, “patata, patatas. What’s the difference? Pancit is pancit, mi amor.”
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iv. 2019 — magda, maldita 
“Carlos, bebe, mahal kita. Mahal kita sobra.” I love you. I love you so much. Magda sighed as she glanced over the notepad that her fiancé left on the end table of the side of her bed— their brainstorming notepad. “But do you really want to get married in a church? In the Philippines while you’re at it?” 
“It’s an idea, mi amor,” Carlos said while he continued to do whatever he was doing in the bathroom, making her listen from the bed as he spoke, “Just how bad is it?” 
“It’s nothing bad,” Magda said quietly, “it’s just something that I wouldn’t personally do. There is a lot of paperwork to do when getting married in a church. Did you know that? Not only that, but we’d have to attend seminars about family planning— which is not right up my alley, seeing as my mother is an unmarried single mother.” 
“Paperwork is what you are worried about?” 
“Why can’t we just elope instead? My Lola grandmother and Lolo grandfather did that, and look— they have my mom, my tito uncle and tita aunt,” she suggested out of the blue. 
“And risk getting killed by either of our mothers?” Carlos scoffed, “I think we should stick to the church idea, yes, mi amor?” 
“Did you not hear the story of my grandparents, love?” Magda asked him, thankful that he couldn’t see the baffled look on her face. 
“More than I can count, mi corazon,” Carlos answered, “they ran away from home, didn’t they? Got married and had your Tia Maria, then your Mama after? They eloped because they weren’t close with their families— but we’re both very close to ours. We can’t do what your grandparents did.” 
She sighed. He wasn’t even wrong. 
The Spaniard walked out of the bathroom, his face now clean-shaven as he sat next to his fiancée. “Look, we don’t have to do the church thing. It was just an idea, hm? I know you don’t want to get married in the Philippines either, so that’s alright. We’ll just send your cousins, your aunt and uncle to wherever we’re going, then we’ll get married. Don’t worry too much.” 
“‘M sorry,” Magda murmured, her fingers fidgeting with the gold engagement ring as she continued, “I’m a killjoy.” 
“No, you’re not,” Carlos huffed out and clasped his hand with her left hand, “you’re the bride. The bride is more than permitted to weigh out the options. If you don’t want the Philippines, that’s okay.
“Truthfully, I just want to marry you,” Carlos murmured as he pulled her closer, “if we didn’t have such scary mothers, I would’ve already married you. You and your YouTube channel.” 
Magda’s chuckle vibrated in his chest as she perched on his lap, “I don’t even know if that will even work out.” 
“I am sure the wedding plans will. If it doesn’t, our marriage certainly will work out for you and your channel.”
“You are a dickhead, mahal.” “I can’t speak the truth now?” 
“There was no need to bring up the channel, dumbass.”
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“Mabuti nalang may passport yung mga pinsan mo,” It’s a good thing that your cousins have passports. Alma San Pedro, Magdalena’s mother, brought up as she sat across the aforementioned woman.
Magda skimmed through the spreadsheet laid out on her laptop’s screen, keeping her eyes on the things Carlos typed out on the guest list as he actively listed who’s responsible for the catering.
Alma continued to speak, “Why didn’t you want to get married in the Philippines? You’ve always wanted to get married in the Tayabas basilica— I could have had your Tita Marie look into it.”
“That was mainly because I thought you got married there,” Magda glanced at her mother before leaving a comment on the name that Carlos had just typed down on the guest list sheet.
“Lando Norris” — Magda San Pedro (monamagsp) commented: “He finally RSVP’d?”
Carlos Sainz (carlossz) replied: “Yes. He said he forgot to do it, but I managed to get him to fill it.”
He was still at Monaco for the race, but between the busy days of partying and racing he decided to abandon his friends and stayed at the hotel to plan his wedding with Magda instead. “Besides, Ma, the wedding’s in two months. Travelling is also time-consuming for most of us.”
“You’re so picky, anak,” child. Alma replied with a playful scoff.
“And you’re not married, Mama,” Magda shot back with the same amount of humour in her tone. “People complain about both, but we can’t find ourselves to care, hm?”
“Hay nako, Ramona Magdalena,” Alma rolled her eyes and sighed exasperatedly. A rhetorical question escaped her mouth, “Bakit ka kaya maldita?” Why are you so cheeky/sassy? 
Mona shrugged, “Tita Maria didn’t take any shit from my private school teachers, Ma. She’s the one who took care of me while you worked here, remember? Go figures.”
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“I can’t believe you’ve invited me to the wedding,” Lando’s eyes glimmered under the warm light of the ballroom hall as he excitedly spoke to Magda. “I know we didn’t speak as much last year, but the fact that you allowed Carlos to invite me? I’m so grateful, mate.”
Magdalena San Pedro— or wait, Magdalena Sainz stood across from the British man with a grin as she tucked her hands into her pockets (she had pockets on her wedding dress that she began to think that God was treating her right today).
The San Pedro-Sainz wedding ceremony took place in the Westin Palace of Madrid. With the hopes of celebrating the love that they shared for years, Carlos and Magdalena managed to get through the hour-long ceremony without a fuss. The romantic venue created an environment full of celebration while keeping it as intimate and private as it could be for their guests and themselves.
Carlos had already made his name known to the Formula One world, his talent being recognized by every fan as the season went on. But nobody knew who Magdalena was to him, and he intended to keep it that way — thus prompting him to keep his marriage a piece of confidential information. Everyone behind the scenes knew he was in a relationship, and with the hopes that he’d get even more popular, PR relationships were introduced and tossed in his way. 
None of the women he was put in the spotlight with ever lasted, and he was slowly earning the title of a Casanova. He didn’t care; he was just doing his duty and driving his car around the tracks while he worried about his partner, who now worked for a designing company based in London— where they both lived. Nobody else in the grid nor anyone in the motorsport community knew who he was romantically involved with. 
Magdalena was another story. She only began to record some videos about her lifestyle as she continued to work for some local designing firm, telling whoever was watching her videos about what she knew about this field of work or what kind of food she’d eat on certain occasions.
She wasn’t as popular as him, but she continued to keep his identity a secret. She lived an average life and she was quite content with it. She’d rather post a video of herself fucking around, but they’ve made a choice to stay private for as long as they could. 
Now Lando Norris was known to be a blabbermouth, but Magdalena had grown quite fond of him when he was still a reserved driver for McLaren as she worked as a PR coordinator for the team. They rarely spoke, sure, but she was certain that she could trust him with anything and he wouldn’t blab about it. Carlos was also friends with Lando, and they continued to be close friends, so Magda never protested against Carlos’ idea of inviting the younger man to the wedding. 
Lando then said, “I find it quite enjoyable— your wedding, I mean. It’s clearly not as big as I would have expected because well… Carlos told me that Filipino weddings are often big, but I love it! I’ve learned more about your wedding traditions than I have in sixth form about geography.”
“Gah, don’t even say that,” Magda rolled her eyes, earning a giggle from Lando as the woman continued, “It’s barely there, I think. We tried not to pour our hearts out into what they would normally practice in the Philippines or here in Spain. Some Filipino things are here — the food, my dress and my family — but it’s just something superficial, you know?” 
“It’s not even just the wedding that taught me a lot!” Lando exclaimed as he laughed, “Your cousins, Lomi, Niño and Lucia? Yeah, I sat with them during the whole ceremony so they kept telling me about wedding traditions and some superstitions: like how you shouldn’t have any relative marry at the same time as you because it’s cursed.” 
“Really? I’m surprised they haven’t said anything mundane,” Magda saw Lando nod at her statement.
“They also started to say that you took one for the team—“ Lando’s forehead creased as he said, “I asked them what they meant by that, then they only said you’re heroic.” 
“Diyos ko.” My god. Magda scoffed. Her cousins spelled nothing but trouble and god did she despise them at times. 
“What? What did that mean, Mags?” Lando asked.
Magda sighed exasperatedly, and with a defeated tone, she answered, “Making up for the challenge we’ve lost, apparently.” 
“Huh?” 
“It’s— just ask Carlitos,” Magda waved off, “I’ve had to explain the concept of colonialism to too many people before. I think it’s time Carlos did it for me.”
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v. 2024 — paninindigan kita (stand by you)
Mamahalin kita buong-buo. I will love you completely.
“So, tell us about yourself.”
“I’m Carlos Sainz— or wait, do you want me to speak Tagalog?” The Ferrari driver asked as he stood in front of the camera, his linen shirt in the view of the lens as he waited to be instructed.
“Directing this music video is the dumbest idea I could’ve ever made,” Magda deadpanned from behind the camera as the videography crew laughed alongside the band members, her voice being picked up by the microphone easily.
Their Philippines trip, which they should’ve made a while ago, was something of an experience for the couple.
It was the first time they’d been seen in public— with everyone finding out about their marriage after Carlos’ Instagram story slip-up when he accidentally posted a photo of Magdalena’s selfie that she sent when she travelled to the country long before this. 
It really was an accident if you were to ask him. But it was something inevitable, and all Magda could do was laugh and make her presence known not only to her fans but to those who were more than interested to know about her. His fans. 
Now, they were in an Airbnb somewhere in the Quezon Province as they filmed some form of documentary. It was meant to be a storytelling music video about their relationship and the romance that came with it, but after seeing Carlos’ script reading at the Shell commercial, Magda practically banned him from acting.
She was a popular content creator in the Philippines regardless of her living situation; she lived in Madrid with her husband for almost five years. And with her popularity in the Philippines came acquaintances who were more than willing to collaborate with her. The folk-pop band called Ben&Ben asked if she was more than willing to shoot a music video with them. Direct it, even. 
The song they released practically spoke about her life with Carlos. At first, she didn’t think too much of the lyrics and just enjoyed the rhythm of the song, then she realized how similar it was to their relationship, from the courtship (and her outward refusal to continue this romance with him at the very beginning) to their vows to love each other as they grow old, and decided that perhaps it was time to show to the world how they truly love each other. 
Carlos agreed, knowing that outside of his life as a Ferrari driver and a Formula One figure, he had nothing else in life but her and her alone. He knew that she was the one thing that he kept from everyone to provide security for his wife. He waited patiently for her — and it was now paying off. Now, he was standing in front of a camera, waiting to be filmed for his interview. 
It was better than the countless documentaries and the Netflix series that he had to do interviews and filming duties for. Because this time, he got to discuss his wife, Magdalena Sainz, instead of his car. 
“Can I speak Tagalog?” Carlos repeated, his typical confused expression being displayed before the others.
Magda shook her head, “You’ll butcher it, Carlitos.”
“Excuse me, Ramona,” Carlos gasped in mock offence. “I can speak it!” 
“Clearly not good enough,” Magda shot back, making the others laugh at the banter between the pair. 
“Your Español isn’t any better then, mi vida,” Carlos scoffed, placing his hand on his chest. 
Magda said, “There’s a reason why I only listen to you and your family when you speak, honey.” 
“This is what I have to deal with every day, by the way,” Carlos pointed out to their audience, making the others burst out laughing as he offered his wife a playful glare. 
One of the videographers spoke before Magda could make a comeback, “Wait, the camera’s still on.”
“Oh shit,” Carlos and Magda both swore before they both laughed. Their banter was caught on camera and they were laughing about it.
It took them good ten seconds to return to their composure as the camera stopped recording. 
Magda cleared her throat, clapping her hands as the camera began recording, and she instructed her husband, “Carlos, we can both speak English— it’s fine. Just speak in English, alright?” 
“Okay, fine,” Carlos rolled his eyes and muttered, “mi esposa. Muy quisquilloso.” My wife. So picky. The microphone attached to his shirt picked up on his comment.
“This is so going to the music video,” one of the band members giggled. 
Magda then continued with the recording segment as she spoke to her husband while she stood behind the camera, “Alright, please state your name and how long you have been with your partner?” 
Carlos nodded and beamed slightly as he stared back at Magda, who was smiling as she expected his answer. With a cheerful tone, he said, “My name is Carlos Sainz. I have been with my wife, Magdalena San Pedro Sainz, for seven years and three months and have been married to her for four years and six months.” 
“What prompted you to stand by her?” Magda asked as she continued to beam at him, not even noticing the heart eyes of the other people in the room. 
Eight years and still extremely in love. 
He answered, “Her determination, wits and her ability to stand by me no matter what kind of disaster came and went made me realize that falling in love with her was worth the effort to make.”
It was no wonder people thought their relationship had nothing to do with two worlds colliding.
Even with their constant light bickering, Magdalena and Carlos Sainz learned how to love each other through words — whether it was their native languages or their secondary ones. What mattered was that they understood the meaning of their love, regardless of what kind of language they had to translate it to.
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fin.
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brainrotcharacters · 1 month
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"Too bad you don't, needle dick" was so random and unnecessary, not to mention untrue ☝️🤨‼️ but they were probably at the point where they both knew no matter what Wade said/did next, Logan would still lunge at him afterwards
"Oh, we're just gettin' started, bub 😈" ISA KA PA PUNYETA KA. Logan is getting excited, Wade knows he's getting excited, Logan knows Wade knows he's getting excited, so what's going on here if not flirting, hmm?
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mayadoesfandomstuff · 5 months
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Akechi's Traitor Speech Translated to Filipino:
Pure Translation:
Mga ka-koponan!? Mga kaibigan!? Punyeta kayong lahat!(1) Paano ako naging masmababa sa 'yo!? Ako'y naging maselan sa aking buhay, sa aking mga marka, sa aking imaheng pampubliko! Para lang may makagusto na makasama ako! Ako ay isang henyong detektibo! Isang tanyag na tao!(2) Pero ikaw… Ikaw ay wala lang kundi isang basurang kriminal na nakitira sa kisame!?(3) Kaya paano!? Paano nagkaroon ng isang tulad mo ng mga bagay na wala ako!? Paano naging mas espesyal ang isang walang kwentang piraso ng basura kaysa sa akin!?
Teleserye Version(4):
Teammates!? Friends!? To hell with that! Bakit ako inferior sa 'yo!? I was extremely particular sa aking buhay, sa aking grades, sa aking public image! So someone would want me around! Ako ay isang ace detective! Isang celebrity! But you… You're just some criminal trash living in an attic!? So how!? How does someone na tulad mo have things na I don't!? How can such a worthless piece of trash be more special than me!?
Translation notes under the cut
There's no specific equivalent I could find for "To hell with that!" so I instead opted for him to call everyone "Punyeta" instead since that feels appropriate for the situation.
I could've used celebrity here too because that is a word used here but I wanted to try my hand in at least finding a somewhat equivalent thing before resorting to just an actual English word so I used "tanyag na tao" or literally "famous person"
There's no exact word that translates to "attic" in Filipino so I instead opted to use "kisame" or ceiling which is honestly a funnier visual.
The Teleserye version is how I would imagine the speech if it was said in a typical teleserye which would mean a lot, and I mean A LOT of English and dramatic pauses. This was actually the first translation I did because I thought it would sound funny.
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ubelaces · 2 months
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tagalog practice!
putanginamo gago punyeta mo maliit ng titi sina @pinkidol at @grdener galit ako ka
die pakiusap
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friedbroth · 3 months
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SHET ANG POGIIIIII PUNYETA KA CYBIRD ARGH ARGH ARGH WOOF WOOF WOOOF GRRRRRR RAWRRRRR AHU AHU AHU AHU YIIPPPIEEEEEE😘😘😘😘😘😘
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bookishtheaterlover7 · 9 months
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To any effort to alba (pun intnded)
Punyeta kang babae ka walang talena na actress di tas maka malaswa online sa lahat na para ma kita sa buong mundo nag pa kasal sa actor na may telento! Siya walang kwenta!!!
Well said, Te! (Ate = big sister in Tagalog, one of the MANY Filipino languages)
GO OFF!!!
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Rough Translation:
You're a beautiful woman, however you're talentless. And have the audacity to be obscene online, where people can see your bare body, around the world. You married an actor with talent, but you're a worthless girl, who's not worthy of womanhood.
Proud to give y'all a sample of how harsh us Filipinos can be 😁 it's mostly the tone, and maybe the facial expressions. But we're mostly nice 😅 just frank, and have harsh wording. But don't give us reasons to hate you, you won't like it.
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themagical1sa · 2 years
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nawawala nanaman ang aming putanginang presidente punyetang bwisit na iyan. God help this country, the death count from the recent typhoon is already rising
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Huwag kang mag inarte, laban lang sa buhay. Mapili ka panaman sa ulam punyeta ka.
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fr0stbearer · 6 months
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do NOT work on your homework for five hours straight‼️‼️
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blurblueturtle · 6 months
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alam mo talagang napapatawa mo yung mga tao pag yung tawa nila may kasamang "tang ina mo talaga", "punyeta ka", "hayop ka", etc.
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getlostsquidward · 2 years
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i don't have time to deal with this it's too early in the morning. kagigising ko lang, lunes na lunes ha ayoko pinapainit ang dugo ko punyeta ka.
you could have said this in a constructive manner but well, thanks for letting me know that it wasn't abo at all. it was my first time writing that stuff and while i did my research, it seems that it wasn't enough. so sorry i offended the omegaverse community
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