#probably jumped headfirst into something that if he actually thought things thru....he wouldn't have been nearly as injured fjsldfjslkd

[clemencetaught]

@jeoseungsaja sent in: things you said with blooming bruises and stinging cuts (for Black Knight verse...I feel I'm gonna regret this one due to endless tears and pain but 🙃) || when the unspoken is named ( things you said prompt. )

19. things you said with blooming bruises and stinging cuts

“KNOB.” It’s said so quietly, for a moment Myungdae doesn’t think that Hyuk picked up on it. Myungdae’s not supposed to be here, getting treatment once more for injuries that according to Alfred, could’ve easily been avoided. Maybe that’s why Hyuk’s shoebox office ended up being Myungdae’s hiding spot from the police once more- he tells himself it’s because he didn’t want to listen to Alfred’s tirade, even if it will be rooted from concern. Actually, there isn’t a point in trying to avoid it because sooner or later, Myungdae will have to return to the clocktower and inevitably bear the consequences of his actions. But for right now-

“I told you, I don’t need it.” Myungdae continues rather petulantly. “You’re wasting your resources on me.” And yet he stays rooted on the stool Hyuk opened for him. Stays still even when the saline pads come out and Hyuk gives him the expectant look to remove his jacket. That last part is always the worst- makes Myungdae want to bolt out the window right there and then. 

Myungdae doesn’t comply because he wants to. It’s because he knows the last time he tried to bolt, Hyuk trapped his arm in a vice grip, smacked him upside the head for being “irrationally stupid", and called him pabo. So what that cut nicked his artery- so what if he crashed into Hyuk’s office once more half way to death’s doorstep. He’s survived worse. He will survive worse. He always pulls through in the end. 

( He has to. )

Yes, Myungdae stays still because he doesn’t feel like getting into another scruffle when he’s only barely managed to scrape his way out of the previous one. It’s not because Hyuk will glare at him in a mixture of frustration, concern, and strangely enough, understanding. It’s not because that last part hurts the most. “At least when I get injured, it’s for a reason. I don’t go picking fights that don’t concern me. Unlike someone.”

The corner of the detective’s mouth twitches, which in a messed-up way, brings a sense of relief as the saline pads come out. One might consider it a maladaptive habit, a humorless play they repeat over and over- the one where the Black Knight prods at the detective to get a rise out of him and the detective, disgruntled, ignores him, plowing through the same business as gracelessly as he does with everything else he does when it comes to the Black Knight.

( “Neither of you would make it in the comedy scene.” Alfred said. And then Nell pointed out they were both, instead, masochists.

“What else would you be?” Nell said. “You’re both broody three-fourths of the time and you’re also like ‘grrr’ for years.” She even included the claw motions with her hands for emphasis. Myungdae decided to ignore both of them. Pointedly. )

“And considering how easily the police manage to catch you, I’m assuming you also keep A SIREN in your pocket at all times- argh!” The bandage is slapped over one of his bruises more roughly than the previous one. Myungdae hisses; out of the corner of his eye, he sees Hyuk snort. It must be his way of getting back at the Black Knight. He’s not the kind of person to simply take things lying down, anyways, not if there’s a chance to dish it back. 

And as for Myungdae? Well apparently, that slight of a reprimand is enough to make Myungdae scowl, greatly annoyed. “Knob.” He repeats once more, if not sullenly. 

It were coming from anyone else, he’d take it more solemnly, especially if it’s coming from either Nell or Alfred. It comes from a good place, he knows, and so the best way to show that he cares is by listening to it sincerely, even if it hurts. Their concern hurts often, in the worst ways because he knows ( and they too ) he won’t stop.

Someone once said that it’s not that the grief grows smaller over the years, it’s that a person’s life around it grows bigger. And sure, he’s made something of a life outside of five years ago, something like a life outside of the Black Knight. And yet, the horizon never appeared. Myungdae doesn’t think it ever will and that life he’s made for himself, going through the motions it demands, can only keep him grounded for so long. Little by little, that life he left behind pulls him back under, this time under the guise of a top hat, a sword, and the alias, the Black Knight. 

( For all the dangers it brings, sometimes being the Black Knight is the only time he can breathe easily. From swords clashing against one another, from sirens roaring in the background, the adrenaline that follows reminds him that he is still alive. Maybe that’s why Hyuk keeps diving head first into fights- it’s a reminder that he’s still alive, somehow, in spite of it all. )

Is this why a scolding from Hyuk inspires more…annoyance rather than grief then? Even when his cuts are getting cleaned out one by one? Because they’re more similar in that aspect: STAGNATING- unable to find healthy ways to move forward. It takes one to know one.

With a majority of the wounds and bruises cleaned and bandaged, the detective takes up a needle and thread and Myungdae feels the hairs on the back of his neck prickle. Stitches. That’s right- he forgot that he needed them for the last one as per Hyuk’s diagnosis. 

“I’m not doing this again.” He decides when the needle makes its first foray under his skin. Hyuk raises a brow. Oh wait- the Black Knight just said that aloud. Unfortunately, the Black Knight also isn’t allowed to take back his words. Myungdae bites the inside of his cheek. “This is the last time you’ll have to do this, you hear me?”

( They both know that’s a lie though. Maybe Alfred is right- they should never become comedians. )

Hyuk goes back to working. Brushes off the Black Knight’s words with a grunt. Myungdae grumbles.

“I’m SERIOUS.”

To which he gets a ( gentle ) smack upside the head. And a threat that he’ll get socked in the face if he keeps moving. Oh, if Alfred and Pawn saw him right now, they’d never let him live it down. The Black Knight…sitting in a shoebox office like a scolded puppy because the detective told him off. If only they knew, that the Black Knight’s kryptonite was, in fact, a person. 

Hyuk asks the Black Knight if he’s going to call him a knob again. Through the mask, Myungdae glares at him.

“You're a git.”