#posting on twitter and ig feels embarrassing so i guess I'll post here where it's chill

[jessdrawz]

still wandering, still processing

[cardiamachina]

my god is this thing even on???

hello, you, who's still hanging around in this almost defunct page! sometimes i come around here after sighting a poem of mine out in the wild of twitter or facebook to see how my little poetry children are doing and i realize i never really expounded on where i went, which is my bad, lmao

well, to start, i am now a nurse in the intensive care unit! i looked back into my archives and realized that when i started writing poetry in this account, i was a NURSING STUDENT eleven years ago! life had expectedly lifed very hard, nursing as a baby nurse was hard, i took the icu course, and then we had that cursed thing happen 2020 ish. my brain chemistry changed a lot, and honestly so did the things i've been writing.

during the time i was away from this account, i was quite focused on long form fanfics. i wrote poetry here and there, but as you guys know with me, i write for people i love. i wrote space-related poetry for deancas, and wrote seventy years of sleep for stevebucky. which still blows my mind what kind of journey soft epilogue ended up embarking???? i leave and then i come back to all that - it was unreal, and thanks for that!

if you're wondering where i am nowadays, i'm kind of all over. i'm on twitter (@NikkaUrsula) and IG (@nikkaursula) for poetry stuff and my fandom twitter i'm gonna hide because i will simply embarrass myself lmao! yes, i am still writing poetry, and it's again about characters i love and people that make me feel things, so i guess i'm no different that where you found me eleven years ago.

i'll be in and out of this page cleaning some stuff up, and maybe updating the format so it's easier for you to read things when you find yourself wandering around my poetry tag. i may post some of my new stuff here too, if anyone's interested in all that.

before i go, i just want to say thanks for listening to what i have to say not only today, but yesterday, a month, a year, a decade ago. i have been writing for a long time, these little feelings that cocoon themselves into little words that escape me. they've traveled a long way to perch on your shoulder, my little monarch butterflies. now they're yours, too.

see you around,

nhixxie/nikka ursula

[kmp78]

TO ALL YOU READERS OUT THERE.

As we all know, on Dec 17 aka tomorrow new über-sensitive rules on tumblr kick in, which means all content their bots/algoritms regard as "unsuitable" will be banished from the platform. 😒

Seeing as I have almost 4 years worth of posts in my archives amounting to a grand total of tens of thousands of posts overall, there is no way for me to go over all of them and remove potentially forbidden ones.

And frankly I wouldn't even know where to start, since we have not been given any concrete guidelines regarding words/pics which "might" need to be deleted, and even if I did have guidelines to work with, the task would be too huge to undertake.

I can find over 1000 posts with the search word "P * r n" and that's just a fraction of the kinds of contents I imagine might need to be removed (one by one, of course), so that gives you an idea of the scale for that task... 😶

Yeah, there's just no possibility for me to do that.

Therefore there is a very good chance that when I wake up tomorrow morning, this blog will no longer exist.

It won't be by my choice, as I don't have any desire to retire from this project, but I can't fight against the powers of the admins on this one. 😔

So, in case that happens, I just want to say a few things while I still can.

First, a MASSIVE thank you to all who have read this blog (just on/off or regularly) and especially to those who have contributed to the making of this blog via asks, submits, reblogs and private chats. Without your contributions this blog would not be what it is (in good and in bad...), and I have no doubt that without your assistance in providing content, I would have left a long time ago.

Altho, in a cruel twist of fate, many of those provided contents will no doubt now be the reason for this blog's demise... 😂🙊

But tbh I'm not even upset about it, because the amount of entertaiment and laughs we have shared over here over the past 4 years could never be measured in money or any other form of currency.

Same of course goes for the amount of tears and aggro shared here... 😝

And speaking of which: let me just give a big ol' "F U C K Y O U and I wish nothing but the absolute worst in life for you and yours and if I saw you on fire on the street I'd struggle to even piss on you to put out the flames, you useless blob of floating diarrhea" shoutout to each and every disgusting c u n t out there who I have had the misfortune of sparring with over the years.

No need to name names.

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND YOU MOST DEFINITELY KNOW WHY I DESPISE THE LIVING SH*T OUT OF YOU.

You folks, with your pathetic fanfics and truly insane "HE'S GAIIIIIIIIII, YANNO!!!!" desperado'ing etc. and especially that one Aussie psycho and the yankee-doodle liverspotty "My BFF Aka The Old Hag Tooootes Is Ferking JL" bulldog (seriously SEEK PSYCHIATRIC HELP IMMEDIATELY), are a true waste of oxygen and pathetic testament to what a sad conglomerate of mentally challenged retards aka SFGs this fandom is.

Whatever misfortunes life tosses your way, just know you've truly deserved it. This "snow N- word" girl from "a 3rd world country across the Atlantic" has enjoyed laughing at and ridiculing/exposing your embarrassing asses here (especially those of you who turned on me for whatever reason), and will continue to do so forever. Your hilarious insanity will never be forgotten. 😙😙😙✌

No kidding, folks: your mothers FOR REALS should have spat you out.

Or maybe swallowed... 🤔 I dunno what kind of sticky-bottom slaggies your mumzies are/were so yeah maybe a good gulp would've been more her MO. 🤷🏼‍♀️

A special shoutout indeed to all those who befriended me for years and know FULL WELL what bull manure this fandom and Leto are, but still woke up one morning and decided to start hating everything about me (for reasons which are still baffling for me): you disgust me and quite honestly make me a bit sad. You USED to be sane and sensible, until the kool-aid kicked in.

Perhaps one day the magic will wear off and you'll come back to your senses again, altho for most of you I don't hold out much hope... oh well, it's not like anyone's life would be worse off without you in it. Mine certainly hasn't been! 🤣

And to all those countless fools out there who wasted their time creating fake accts with my name and pics hoping I'd quit: 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂.

I hope at some point in life you look back on your actions and realize how insane you stalkers were to obsess (yes, obsess) over me.

Your efforts really got you nowhere... ⛔

Oh no wait I got major laughs and kicks from ridiculing you, so yeah you did get that far. 😂

You deserve to feel #proud . 🙏

If I'm worthy of THAT MUCH attention from you...

Damn, I must be quite awesome! 😎

(I am, actually. 🙃 Oh and I also like pizza, with pineapples and a slice of Leto... 🍕😂😎)

And then on the other side of the fence:

I could never fully express my gratitude and appreciation to the people who I have become friendly with over these years.

You also know who you are, and I will be reaching out to you via private chat later today! 😉

Honestly, you have been the absolute best thing about this entire experience and I'll value the times and experiences we have spent together for the rest of my life. 💓

The support I have received both publicly and especially privately from many out there (some I still have the pleasure of keeping in touch with, and some who have sadly faded into the distance) has been much appreciated and I hope you all realize it.

THIS community is leaps and bounds superior to the actual Mars one.

Thank you for the laughs, the freak-outs, the arguments, the secrets, for taking part in my competitions and puzzlers, for reading my Finland posts, for suggesting non-Mars topics, for sharing personal stories...

It has been one hell of a trip! 😂

I wish you folks nothing but the best and if this is the end, then perhaps at some point, somewhere out there, our paths shall cross again! 😉😘

My IG acct ( @kmp78 ) will remain (unless they too see it worthy of deleting...), so that's where you'll find me if all else fails! 😜

Also my secondary acct here ( @kmp78secondaryblog ) will remain UNLESS it's also taken down by the admins.

And of course my e-mail ( kmp78@yahoo.com ) also reaches me in the future, as well as my Twitter ( @kmp78obvs ).

And with that... well, there's not much else to say, I guess. The situation is what it is. 😞

Have a nice Sunday, everyone!

God willing we will meet again tomorrow. If not, then c'est la vie! 😘👋

With much ❤❤❤ (or perhaps🖕🖕🖕, depending on reader),

K