#poor Florida Man

[deadheaddaisy]

If you see that face coming at you? Don't roll into a ball. Throw the slowest person behind you and run for your life.

All too often, when I read lists of “species I wouldn’t fuck with in Australia under any circumstances” this living dinosaur that can kill you with one kick does not get enough credit.

[trektown]

Using my photo editing skills for evil to make Florida man DS9 memes

[subbanator]

Panthers v Oilers ... SCF game 4 ... 15.06.2024

[witchofthesouls]

I really want to see a fic where a Cybertronian is having a Primus save me moment over their human (spouse, lover, friend, child, I don't care).

Maybe they're smoking, trying to mull over their dear human's troubles and shenanigans, and another human working at the base rolls up to be like, "What's wrong?"

Cybertronian is explaining all the crazy things, just for the new guy to be like, "Buddy, you got yourself an American, and they're fucking out there!"

[ratatatastic]

Guess Who? Global Series Panthers edition.

my favourite dynamic for dumb games that don't particularly matter is sore loser who's trying not to be a sore loser and man who acts like winning means he gets the keys to the city rather than just a participation sticker

[formulahuh]

being a logan sargeant fan means hoping every weekend he’ll make it out of q1 and every weekend experiencing heartbreak :/

[dougielombax]

*Ron DeSantis disappears into the void while shrieking in terror on rollerskates*

A minor inconvenience.

He will NOT be missed.

Anyway.

[luckkems]

Some old doodles bc I haven't posted in a while (I'm on vacation 🤩)

Okay bye for a few more days ✌️

CW GUN!!!!!

[markymarkstrom]

Can we also get a mental welfare check and an IV for Bob?

[jpriest85-blog]

I've come up with another Scarlet Hollow MC, the infamous Florida Man ™️ cousin Jackson Scarlet. He started out as a joke playthrough, but then I got emotionally attached to the weirdo. I mean, the dude offers everyone that bag of boiled peanuts in greeting, and ironically enough, it is one of the few Scarlets to ever go to prison for a crime he was innocent of. I've included some concept art of Jackson, his roommate Truck the cat.

Name: Jackson Darwin Scarlet 

Gender: male 

Sexuality: Pansexual

Age: 25

Height: 5ft10"/177.8cms

Eye color: gray

Hair: Dark brown, straight, and cut short and messy

Face claim: Tom Hardy 

Home city: Tampa

Notable features: the characteristic Scarlet ™️ cheekbones and deep set eyes. As well as a scar on his right eyebrow, stubble, a slightly crooked nose due to a break that didn't set right, and a few faded stab wounds on his lower abdomen beneath his belly button. Jackson also has several tattoos; a Raven on the right side of his chest, a prison tattoo of barbed wire and pocket watch with no hands on his right bicep, and a Madonna and child tattoo on his left bicep. Almost always seen wearing denim pants or shorts, a white tank top, and tacky tropical shirts in eye searing colors, no matter the weather.

Traits:

Gator wrestler Talks to animals/Powerful

Eloquent Ex-con Powerful/Book smart

Dr. Doolittle Talks to animals/ Book smart

The Birdman of Hardee Correctional Talks to Animals/Street smart

Occupation: student trying to get a degree in Biology

Living situation: shares an apartment with an asshole roommate, Truck the cat.

Romance: has a serious crush on Kaneeka.

Personality: The infamous Florida man™️ cousin. Jackson can be impulsive and reckless to the point most of Peralanne's rumors about him aren't that far from the truth like dragging an alligator out of a neighbor's pool, or getting banned from a local pet store for trying to free the animal when he was a kid, ect. Though he knows it wasn't easy for Vivian to raise him, especially with some of the crazy stuff he put her through, Jackson adored his mother dearly to the point he had a reputation for being a giant Mama's Boy. He was also raised to be a gentleman so Jackson is always very respectful of women and always addresses ladies he meets as ma'am and tips his hat, even if the lady in question is an elderly pug dog.

While he does come across as a reckless dumbass Jackson is actually pretty smart. Since he can talk to animals he developed a fascination with Biology from an early age and takes a huge interest in protecting endangered species. He's also surprisingly well read and is fond of the writings of very diverse authors from William Shakespeare to Toni Morrison. 

Sadly, Jackson had a very difficult time making friends with other children his age. Animals he's fine with, but other kids don't really want to play with the boy who claims he can understand what the class hamster is saying. So when he finally did make friends, he was desperate to keep them, even if they were bad influences. Sadly, Jackson's blind loyalty got him into trouble when he took the blame for his best friend on drug charges. Since the Scarlet family name doesn't have much pull in Florida, Jackson wound up spending 4 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit. Thankfully, he did eventually get his name cleared and was on his way to getting his life together, going back to school, attending AA. Things were looking up…until Vivian was diagnosed with cancer. 

Miscellaneous info & Headcanons

Jackson's father was a miner named Teague O'Byrne who came looking for work after fleeing Northern Ireland during The Troubles. Vivian never shared much about Jackson's father other than he loved to share stories with her about all the folklore they both grew up with.

In addition to the Talipo story, Vivian sometimes shared Irish folktales with Jackson she heard from his father. Jackson's favorite was the story about Selkies.

Jackson's middle name, Darwin, is a reference to the famous naturalist and his interests in biology. Also, for the infamous Darwin awards where people wind up dying in very stupid ways, which so far, Jackson has only gotten honorable mentions.

In addition to being able to speak with animals, Jackson is fluent in Spanish.

As a child, he always wanted to be a pirate or sailor so he could marry a mermaid and live out in the ocean with their part fish kids.

Jackson likely has undiagnosed ADD/ADHD, but considering his trouble finding health insurance, it's going to be a while until he can get it treated.

Due to his excessive energy, Vivian tried to get Jackson involved in sports to help him focus. He did pretty well on the high school wrestling team and was eligible for some college scholarships…until his best friend got into trouble with drug possession, and Jackson took the wrap for him.

Due to being able to communicate with animals and how much the Talipo story frightened him as a child, Jackson decided early on he'd become a vegetarian.

Jackson attended Braulio Alonso High School, which had a Raven mascot. He still owns the Navy and gold varsity jacket.

Despite all the unscrupulous and illegal things the Scarlet family has done over the years, Jackson is the only family member to have on record gone to prison, and ironically, it was for a crime he was innocent of.

Growing up, one of Jackson's few friends was a kid named Benny Johnson, who moved to Tampa from Miami in the 3rd grade after his parents divorced. Jackson bonded with him over the fact they're both being raised by single moms, but that's where the similarities end. Benny's mother was a bitter ex-trophy wife that never seemed happy with anything even though she made good money off the alimony from her plastic surgeon ex, and often spoiled her son while being condescending to the people around her.

During his trial, Jackson's best friend, Benny, did testify, but instead of returning the favor for Jackson taking the blame for the drug possession charges, he threw him under the bus.

While Jackson harbor some resentment for Benny betraying him, he didn't try to hurt him or plot to destroy his life. Instead, Jackson convinced a family of skunks to move into his ex-friend's house and taught them how to safely hide and escape from an eventual visit from pest control.

Due to spending 4 years in prison, Jackson missed out on a lot of pop culture references and jokes. Like when Kaneeka's brother Miles compared him to a character from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure because he's into marine biology and spent time in prison, and the reference went completely over his head.

Jackson's favorite TV shows are pro-wrestling programs, The Golden Girls and Magnum PI. He also starts getting into Murder She Wrote when he befriends Stella and Gretchen.

Truck the cat is a main coon cat with a gray striped coat pattern, which is why Jackson's old room gave the cat the name Truck because he's so fucking huge.

I headcanon Truck's first owner was a chef and Jackson's ex-boyfriend. Part of the reason Truck is such a brat to Jackson is because he doesn't spoil him with treats like his "real dad" used to, since Jackson is a vegetarian and worries about Truck's health.

I headcanon Truck the cat was a rescue part of the reason Jackson keeps him after his roommate/ex-boyfriend moves out is he can relate to how hard it is to build a life after being locked up for so long.

Truck the cat has an ongoing rivalry with an alligator that likes to sneak into the neighbor's pool that Jackson affectionately addresses as, Big Edie.

Jackson often used to get into arguments with Truck when the cat would steal his food. They usually devolved into yelling at each other in Cuban Spanish.

In addition to arguments about stealing food and bathroom etiquette, Jackson doesn't like that Truck tends to monopolize the TV. The cat will scream at Jackson for hours if he doesn't get to watch his telenovelas.

Before leaving for Scarlet Hollow Jackson left Truck in the care of an elderly neighbor who he affectionately calls Abi (granny) Marisol.

Jackson often jokes that his cousin Tabitha is like his grumpy parole officer.

In a strange way, Jackson's dynamic with Tabitha mirrors his relationship with Truck the cat but reversed. Jackson would often get into arguments with Truck just for trying to keep the cat alive; like keeping Truck from eating foods that'll make him sick, or trying to stop him from trying to constantly fight Big Edie, the alligator that keeps sneaking into the neighbor's pool. Likewise Tabitha and Jackson often argue about Jackson constantly winding up in dangerous situations, and it's only a matter of time before he comes to the hilarious realization he's basically become the jackass cat to his cousin.

[pleckthaniel]

Omg my jet has a screen on the back of the seat? What is this the future

[ratatatastic]

happy our defence is terribly dumb and stupid and mikksy suplexed a guy onto knighter (he clearly meant to knock him down in the open space between knighters legs but just miscalculated) while he was down trying to trap the puck

rip knighter who just looked at him and went ??? while mikksy quickly tried to fix his mistake by ragdolling sillinger to a much safer space farther away from the crease like he wasnt the one who put him on top of knighter in the first place

may he not earn the ire of his goalie amen

florida panthers @ columbus blue jackets | 10.15.24

[mbenguin]

Where were you when PragerU started dropping videos about historical figures and how did your sanity do upon viewing

[formulahuh]

i know logan broke the rules and everything but like way to kick a guy when he’s already down

[yamimichi]

[sharlsworld]

⋆⭒˚.⋆ thirsty boy - ʟɴ4 ☆

✿ lando norris x influencer!reader

✿ lando norris is always thirsting for his girlfriend any chance he can get

ᵃᵘᵗʰᵒʳˢ ⁿᵒᵗᵉ ୨୧ i don’t know what this is

🝮

yn

📍miami

liked by pierregasly and 3,935,017 others

yn we in this bitch

francisca.cgomes finna get crunk

⤷ lillymhe eyebrows on fleek

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux da fuq

⤷ yn MY GIRLS 💓💞💖💕💝💗

landonorris early…..not first 😞

⤷ francisca.cgomes HA

⤷ lilymhe HA

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux HA

landonorris your so aesthetic i love you

landonorris your so bhad 🤤🍆🍌🍒🍑😫

⤷ yn woah there buddy slow your roll

⤷ landonorris i thought you liked when i went fast?

⤷ carlossainz55 Mate…why do you always do this?

georgerussell63 Slay queen! You’re serving cunty fierce independent girl boss! 😘💖

⤷ yn i’ve created a monster

landonorris HEY! WHOS IN THE 3RD SLDIE?

⤷ yn my girl alex durrrr

⤷ charles_leclerc I miss my girlfriend

⤷ lovely_leclerc AWHHH HOW CUTE

🝮

landonorris

📍 miami beach, florida

liked by lahjay10_ and 925,055 others

landonorris miami w this absolute bhaddie

yn freaky boy

⤷ landonorris yk it baby 😉 all for u

♥︎ by yn

francisca.cgomes bhaddie indeed 😍

alex_albon will we ever get a post not including y/n? even on race post’s you manage to get her in there

⤷ landonorris never this is actually a y/n fanpage if you haven’t noticed

⤷ mclaren Oh we’ve noticed 😅

landolovesyn mclaren is fed up of lando clinging to y/n all day

♥︎ by mclaren

estiebestie there so goals i cannot i am manifesting a relationship like this 😫😫

oscarpiastri I have to deal with these all weekend

hoeforsainzzz he’s so obsessed with her i need that

🝮

who_tf.is_yn

liked by sydney_sweeney and 102 others

who_tf.is_yn erm what the sigma

landonorris first

landonorris don’t act like i didn’t get you all hot and bothered 😘

⤷ who_tf.is_yn cringe ball 🤢

⤷ landonorris that’s not what you were saying last night

⤷ oscarpiastri I know. I hate you both. I will be sending my therapy bill to you two.

lilymhe divorce babe divorce

⤷ landonorris we’re not even married yet?

charles_leclerc That sick bastard

alexandrasaintmleux 🤢🤢🤢 how pervy

georgerussell63 Risky boy 😈

⤷ who_tf.is_yn what the fuck

🝮

yns.no1fan

liked by oscarpiastri and 46 others

yns.no1fan i’m having withdrawal symptoms guys i’m going crazy without y/n

yn girl…it’s been 6 hours

⤷ yns.no1fan that’s 6 hours to long i miss the comfort and warmth of your touch

⤷ yn awhhh that’s kinda sweet 🥹

⤷ yns.no1fan i miss your ass too

⤷ yn there it is

alexandrasaintmleux don’t worry me kika and lily are taking great care of her

⤷ yns.no1fan make sure she eats before 12 or she gets hangry 🥹

alex_albon the only time i ever see you guys away from each other is when your racing or doing interviews

carlossainz55 Let me cheer you up 😉

⤷ yn fuh nah stay away from my man

⤷ yns.no1fan 😈😈😏 oh your getting it tn

⤷ carlossainz55 OK! Gonna go bleach my eyes brb

🝮

yn

liked by leahhalton_ and 7,016,825 others

yn in my own world

landonorris first

♥︎ by author

landonorris can i join?

⤷ yn always

maxfewtrell get a rooooommmm

estiebestie why is lando always horny

charles_leclerc 🤢🤢

⤷ landonorris piss off

⤷ yn so british

lilymhe i can’t wait to see you my girl!!! 💗

⤷ yn i’ve been waiting for you 😇

smoothoperator55 i pray for a relationship like lando and y/n’s before i go to sleep

charles_leclerc Where the hell is my picture credit for the beach picture?

⤷ yn up your ass

⤷ charles_leclerc I don’t see it

danielricciardo Guy this is the it relationship I fear

georgerussell63 Cutie patootie goals I need, Carmen take notes

⤷ carmenmmundt 😐

oscarpiastri I’m tired of this grandpa 😖

⤷ landonorris that’s to damn bad

🝮

bobs.privy_priv

liked by charles_leclerc and 34 others

bobs.privy_priv mukbang out tonight stay tuned dropping at 9pm 😉😇

pierregasly SICK PLEASE NO

francisca.cgomes don’t do this lando.

alex_albon NO MY POOR EYES

carlossainz55 Yuck! 🤢🤮

danielricciardo Do it no balls 😈

⤷ maxverstappen1 Don’t tempt him idiot he might actually release a sex tape

lilymhe fuh nah fuh nah where is the bleach at

alexandrasaintmleux what have you done to my sweet innocent naïve baby girl

⤷ bobs.privy_priv there ain’t nothing sweet or innocent about that girl

georgerussell63 What in the bloody hell did I just witness mate

⤷ bobs.privy_priv greatness that’s what

⤷ georgerussell63 I don’t think that’s it

🝮

landonorris

liked by maxverstappen1 and 4,425,981 others

landonorris i can be sweet guys

yn once in a blue moon

⤷ landonorris what can i say, you unleash my inner dawg 😈😈

⤷ carlossainz55 Please no.

alexandrasaintmleux rarely

carlando there the cutest couple ever

estiebestie everyone shut up lando isn’t being a horny teenager for one

♥︎ by yn, lilymhe, francisca.cgomes, alexandrasaintmleux, and carmenmmundt

charles_leclerc NO PICTURE CREDIT??

⤷ landonorris no your mean to me

oscarpiastri Rare sighting of lando not trying to pull y/n away to the closest room

⤷ lewistearmeup thank you so much for this information oscar

⤷ yn i hate you oscar piastri

⤷ oscarpiastri Forgive me queen