#pls also lmk if i should change anything as well :'D

[exorcqism]

❛ THE DESIRE DISEASE — 欲望

choso x f!reader ﾉ MDNI

𑂻𑂴 summary. ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ𓂃ㅤ choso finally has a feeling of want, need, and deep desire..

𑂻𑂴 tags. ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ𓂃ㅤ choso (still a cursed spirit), modern AU, nsfw, female anatomy, mentions of abuse, smoking, possible sexual content, mentions of murder/suicide, canon/modern lore mixes, obsession, etc.

𑂻𑂴 a/n. ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ𓂃ㅤ new layoutttt :) but this story MIGHT be a series. if ya like it i’ll keep going. reblog to support meeee and enjoy :D (if i decide that this should be a series, pls lmk if you wanna be tagged) (and don’t steal this plot or i’ll find you.)

𑂻𑂴 misc. ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ𓂃ㅤ masterlist ,, AO3 — dark mode recommended. WC — 2.23K

humans have a complex mind. they can never make up their minds about anything. their wants and needs consistently change periodically and they go with whatever suits them. they may need food, a drink, new clothes or shoes just to be stylish for the occasion.

they also crave attention, drugs, money, and sex. this is what we would call the desire disease. a compelling disease that plunges you into the dark depths of life, pushing you to do the unimaginable but most important thing in your personal perspective at that moment. your impulses. those odd and horrible thoughts that cross your mind in the middle of the night, suddenly being acted on in broad daylight.

such disease develops in all living beings fairly quickly. they see what they want, they have fantasies of having such thing, they act, and receive. if one does not receive their desire, they will push extremities to have what they desire. there are four stages of this disease.

exposure, isolation, consumption, obsession.

one can jump immediately from stage one to stage four in the matter of months…days…hours…minutes….seconds.

giving in to your desires leads to infection. turning away from your desires means you have been cured. no one is ever cured, unfortunately.

choso never had a want for anything. as long as he was treated well, he didn’t mind the horrors of being so-called human and being accustomed to their ways of life. the boy could never hate anyone, for he feared being hated by everyone.

there was only one person that he had a deep hatred for. the one responsible for giving him such a terrible life. the one that took his mother from him, who he barely knew. no memories existed of this woman…but he loved her.

he’d make a vow to himself to kill his father when he was able to find him after he was left behind to live on his own. his father’s death was brutal…but it was hard to fight against the man that cared nothing for him and his brothers. it drove choso to insanity when he figured out that a young boy named yuji itadori was his brother…and his father tricked him into killing him. the male was lucky to realize this before yuji died.

bloody clothes, bloody shoes, and an apathetic expression. each step he took, there was an unsettling squelching noise while his father lied on the hardwood floor, dead.

but he left a message…signed in his own crimson fluid.

“i’ve made many mistakes growing into this body i was given. though, my words cannot express how grateful i am to be in a vessel like this…my words also cannot express how much hatred i feel for you. i’ve bent to your will before many times, unknowing of who you truly were…then i figured you out. you’ve ruined my life…so i took yours. you’ve made me capable of such power—that is what i am thankful for. but i will never forgive you for the hell i’ve been forced to endure because of your actions. if i should meet you again, i hope you die rougher than you had when i killed you. if i should cry, i cry for my mother. not you. i cannot form an apology or sympathy for you but i shall give you a goodbye and give you the gift of exposure. you wanted the attention, right?”

not that he ever craved the idea of murder, he seemed somewhat relaxed that day when he believed that he was free from the prison he called home once before. it would be considered odd behavior among humans and he’d be accused for the death of someone…but he knew he’d be full on guilty. he should’ve made it look like a suicide. he’s seen murders look like that in movies.

he’d travel to the bathroom, cleaning himself off and changing into some new clothes and shoes to avoid being found out. he’d remove the ponytails from his head, leaving his hair to hang down over his shoulders and reaching the trapezius of his back.

he would wipe the purple eyeshadow from eyes as he stared at the dark purple irises in the mirror, revealing how dead and tired he truly was. it was like his body could shut down at any moment.

now, choso had been wearing a black hoodie and a pair of pants. something so simple. it would last him a while until he would have to steal some clothes or wash them at a laundromat that he could just barely afford.

he sighed, planning his next move as he’d drag the corpse into the backyard and bury it deep down into the soil before walking back inside.

this was where he would remain…and he’d start a new life without the monster that concealed him from the world…from his own life.

PRESENT DAY — AUGUST 13TH

“see ya, kid.” the tattoo artist called after choso. the male silently lifted his hand before exiting the shop. he had gotten a new piercing just above his left eyebrow. the man that done this body art for him was his favorite and probably someone he could consider a friend.

choso had a few piercings now. a tongue piercing that nearly reached the tip of it, two cartilage piercings in his left ear with two regular earrings to accompany them, a side lip piercing, which was a simple silver ring and a nose piercing. he was torn between a septum and a simple diamond stud but he got the stud anyway. he didn’t wanna be too extra.

the male was influenced by what people would call “emo” style. he loves rock music and wearing rings on his fingers. even his clothing style stands out a lot. the band tees that blow lightly in the wind and large combat boots that slam against the floor each time he walked.

choso even cut his hair into a wolf cut. a style that he had been interested in for a while. his hair was fluffy and dyed black. different from his original brown hair. the male would also paint his nails black but the polish was a bit cheap so he was always painting over them.

he looked like the epitome of an emo boy.

knowing that he was a bit ashamed of existence, he would cover his blood mark with a bandage when he went out in public, which raised a lot of questions.

“ah, it’s just a scratch i got. it’s just healing.” he’d say simply.

pulling his hood over his head, he’d make his way to the liquor store, buying himself a pack of cigarettes, a few tv dinners, and a new lighter. the second he left, he’d immediately open the pack and take out a cigarette, the chain jingling from his jeans as he walked.

the male didn’t have any source of income at the moment, so finding money was crucial. even if it meant stealing it. inside, he usually felt bad but he would remind himself that he needed it more than the entitled humans that walked with their chins up and their chests out while he stood on the sidelines. silent and slumped over.

he knew stealing was morally wrong but something in his mind just told him to take what he needed and to never hesitate…but he always hesitated.

back at home, he would clean each of his piercings, playing with the one above his eyebrow and wincing a bit, followed by a couple of swears.

the house was quite peaceful now that there wasn’t anyone nagging at him or telling him that he was a waste of time. he was happy that he wasn’t being attacked all the time, having to physically fight back in order to avoid being seriously hurt.

this kind of behavior sent him into a state of emptiness rather than trauma or fear. it explains his dull expression. the bandages that covered his bloodied and bruised skin only reminded him of how bad he wanted to get away.

choso made his way to the backyard. it was a serene area with a tiny stony waterfall, which pooled into a small body of water. there was a large japanese maple tree in the middle of the yard…this was where he buried his father. but he entirely ignored that aspect.

instead of being locked away in his room, like he had been for most of his existence, he would come outside and sit near the miniature waterfall to find peace.

on his phone, scrolling through instagram is where he would find a beautiful picture of a girl taking a simple photo of her in her room. that girl was you. choso was instantly captivated by your soft smile and the shape and color of your eyes.

he was about to like the photo but he decided that he’d look on your account some more. you had an interesting style that heavily matched you. something that would stand out among others. if there was a large crowd in public, he’d probably notice you first.

bookmarking a few of your photos, he decided that he would save them for later to admire the new love of his life. there was one thing that held him back a bit…you were human. he was terrified, thinking that you wouldn’t like him.

‘you’d probably hate me..’ he thought. ‘i’m not like you.’

then again, how would you know? he looks just like everyone else. how would you be able to tell that he was a cursed spirit until he told you so or if he revealed his abilities to you? you won’t know. you’ll never know.

a faint smile appeared on his face as he would type a comment on your recent photo, simply complimenting you then quickly turning his phone off, worrying about how you’d react. the adrenaline was speeding through his veins.

his phone vibrates and he quickly drops it, now going into a panic about what the alert might’ve been. having a phone was always scary to him because it was always making noise.

slowly, he’d reach for the phone and turn it over, frowning a bit when he saw the small crack on the screen protector. that frown quickly turned into a smile when he seen the notification from you, replying to his comment and liking it. he also noticed that it was a pinned comment.

he didn’t know if he should be excited or horrified that he was noticed by you so quickly. he was tempted to text you now but again, he was scared…but he fell in love so quickly.

he spent his next few days on a burner account, watching your story and screenshotting the photos on you posted, smiling excitedly each time he would randomly check your account just to see that you posted a new picture or a video.

he swore up and down that you were simply a crush and that he’d move on fairly quickly once he loses interest. but deep down, he could never get rid of you. you were always on his mind. he wanted you. he needed you. he craved you.

this is the first stage of the desire disease—exposure.

it was an amazing coincidence when he saw you in public in the store he went to consistently for cigarettes. a blush settled across his cheeks as he noticed you with your friend buying some snacks for yourselves.

listening to your voice was like a song that he couldn’t get out of his head. it was memorable. but the second he realized that he was staring, he would blink and try to focus on what he was originally trying to do.

“you know her?” he heard yuji ask, making him jump.

“oh…no. she just looks familiar, that’s it.” he lied. the pink haired boy smirked before throwing his arm around choso. he was up to something.

“why don’t you go say something to her? i mean, that’s how you make friends,” yuji said. “maybe you’ll even get a partner out of it.”

“oh..uh, i don’t really want that. i don’t even like how it sounds.” choso mumbled. even though he was lying straight in yuji’s face about wanting a partner, he wasn’t completely lying.

“you obviously do, man. look, you fit most girls type. you’re tall, got cool hair, and you got a good personality. you can figure out the rest. and if they don’t like your style, they could definitely get used to you.”

‘i look too depressed to even be likable..’

“nope. i highly doubt it.” he replied. “i like being alone anyway. what’s the point of being with someone that’ll eventually leave you?”

“hey, good question.” yuji put his finger on his chin. “listen, it doesn’t hurt to try. unless you like window shopping.”

“do i look like the kind of guy to talk to women?”

yuji waved his hand, “you’ll get used to it. hey let’s go outside, i wanna show you something.”

this is how choso was introduced to porn. yuji would tell him how it was a way to ‘relieve himself’. the male was clearly confused and he didn’t understand the excitement of watching others perform such activities.

that same evening he spent watching in his room, just to see why yuji wanted to expose him to this footage so badly.

and that’s when he felt a tightness in his sweats.

© EXORSIIAN | © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

[ofgentleresolve-a]

hahaha, lying?? whatever made u think that ( ft. @theimpalpable​ )

   THE REQUEST SOUNDS A LITTLE strange since the beginning, but shouldn’t she be used to that by now, coming from the always so eloquent Myungdae? Whenever he steps into her office, it seems like he’s ready to offer a more bizarre petition than the last one; his tales being quite...well, doubtful. Like the one at hand, for example. Most parents worried about their children’s diet tend to read labels when shopping; scan nutritional facts, even download those apps where you can take a picture of the product and it tells you if it’s healthy or not. But to bring a sample of an ingredient upon the hands of a biochemist? It’s a bit radical, isn’t it?

  Well, that if she pretends to think he’s telling the truth and nothing but the truth. However, it’s difficult to fully believe him when he hands her not a package of the ingredient, or at least some sort of container normally used within the kitchen, but a syringe. If he’d told her that he’s trying to stuff a turkey with this, that’d be more believable than the whole soup spiel.

 Dainty fingers hold the syringe. She looks at Myungdae and gives him a smile that probably expresses more than what she’ll say about this. He’s a nice one, he is...but he’s...not exactly the best at lying.

  “Why is it in a syringe?” She dares to softly ask; careful hand lifting item up to take a look at it against the light. “Interesting color, too. Is this a different kind of broth that the cool kids use these days?” She amusingly frowns, before giving a small sigh. “So...you want to know what it contains and where...it’s being made? I think that, uhm, can be done. The latter might...might take longer, depending on whether I’m able to find, uhm, unique elements in it or not. I must ask, though, out of...curiosity...”  

  She places the syringe inside a box nearby; neatly so. Preferable to keep it away from the view of others than dealing with questions about why is there something like that peacefully resting on her desk. “Where do you buy your stuff to cook, Professor? Did this come in another mystery bundle?”

Now that she mentions it, it is a good question: why is it in a syringe? Myungdae didn’t think too much about that when he had stolen it. All he knew was that an ANACHRON agent had in a briefcase and therefore it was something worth stealing. Any information from ANACHRON is worth the gamble, even if Myungdae got a nice bullet graze on his shoulder in return. Said shoulder aching, he looks up at the ceiling and considers his options. And then: “I ran out of THERMOS CONTAINERS.”

 Well. That might be the most ridiculous excuse he’s come up with yet. He can only imagine the eye rolls Rook and Pawn would give him for his subpar on-the-fly thinking ( so he is a fool; so he intentionally makes up bad lies. It just makes hiding the important secrets easier if they think he’s irreverent ). Tilting his head, Myungdae beams at her and lets a shallow smile tug on his mouth. Does he know Miss Logan most definitely doesn’t believe him? Why, yes, he does. Is he going to keep up the facade? Absolutely! “I suppose wouldn’t know much about the...food trends young people follow these days. All the more reason to be cautious, no?”

Although ‘young people’ might apply more to his son than his daughter- she’s only a little older than a toddler at this point. Hiro, on the other hand, well, it’s safe to say the former has decided he doesn’t have the patience to teach. “Just your typical supermarket, Miss Logan. And one of new food delivery services. You’d be surprised with what items they tend to add as bonuses.“

Myungdae does have to wonder though- why does Miss Logan keep humoring him? It’s not like she reaps any benefits from abetting him and even getting him the information fast, cheap, and accurate. If anything, she could easily report him to her supervisor or even the police. It wouldn’t matter who. His smile turns a little more solemn, a little more GENUINE. “If you could get the results to me as soon as possible, I would truly appreciate it, Miss Logan.” A pause. Should he ask now or the next time he inevitably sees her? “I suppose it would be imprudent of me to ask for one more favor? I’ll understand if you refuse; I wouldn’t want to take up more of your time.”

[ofgentleresolve]

a long awaited reunion! ( @jeoseungsaja​ )

The truth on the matter is that for all the insouciance he might exude, Yoojin is almost never late for his appointments. Sure, he might have all the time in the world, but the same cannot be said for his fellow…humans. Creatures, clinging to the wheel of life itself. And as such, time is a precious commodity that Yoojin imagines they would not want to waste.

That and Yoojin is not one to break promises. He’s good at waiting and seeing them through, he likes to think.

But in this particular case, he holds himself back initially from greeting the detective who has asked to meet with him. Is it disbelief that makes him hesitate? Or it is the need to hold his joy back that finally, he gets to see an OLD FRIEND again, however much the latter has changed?

( And just from observing from afar, it seems that Wang Yeo- no, Saja, has changed a lot, despite keeping his penchant for dark colors. Suits. Gone is the timid demeanor reluctant to stray from the straight and narrow path his job as a grim reaper dictated for him. It’s been replaced by what seems to be a dour expression, Like a sour lemon combined with the attitude of a stallion. Undaunted, unbridled.

At least he got rid of the hat.  

Yoojin laughs, scratching the back of his head. Yes, his body did, in fact, ache for a long moment, the trauma of a fall from a high place tremoring through his bones, leaving cracks in a few too. And then like the tide, the pain receded, blood vessels stitching themselves back together as the bones welded themselves back into their proper pieces in their proper spots. But more importantly, where has he heard that phrase before? Ah, well, it doesn’t look like Saja- no the detective is generous with his time.

“There was? Oh, I didn’t notice- I figured since I was late, it’d be faster to get down this way. Saves you time, right Mister?” He tilts his head. A napkin? “Oh, thank you, Mister; I see you’re still prepared as ever!”

Taking the offered napkin, he wipes his cheek, watching the detective. Lee Hyuk- so this is the person his old friend has reincarnated into. The guilt that was once etched into his soul has been washed away, now replaced with a dose of…vitality- energy that only life itself could exude. A far cry from death itself.

Hanunim works in mysterious ways.

Yoojin shakes his head, offering his hand. “Nice to meet you then, Detective Lee! Let’s see, you said Namusario Coffee three days ago, right? I believe I was there- what can I tell you then?”

[hellroots]

『 MOBILE FRIENDLY RULES 』

— here you will find my rules or can also find them on my gdocs as well once i’m done with it. please like this if you read it, but otherwise don’t interact with this post, thank you. rest assured that i always read my moots rules before following and that i fully expect the same courtesy. i tried not to let them get too long but feel free to ask me anything you wanna know about them if it’s not clear ok?

 『 THE MUN』

NOXTROMUN, THEY/THEM, 21+, BRAZILIAN

shy but friendly ! i don't follow for follow, if i follow you that means i've read your rules and want to write with you. i have no triggers nor squicks of my own except drama in the dash, for that reason i do not engage in callouts/witch hunts and if you do it on a constant basis i might have to hard block you for my own peace of mind. although i may come off too strong/harsh, i am always up to talking things out privately. as long as you are civil, so am i. any form of hate will be deleted and blocked -  sometimes mocked, if i’m feeling cocky…

『 THE BLOG』

HELLROOTS, INDIE ( POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING AND NOT MINOR FRIENDLY ), HIGHLY SELECTIVE & PRIVATE MULTIFANDOM MULTIMUSE

primarily run on a low activity \ effort and with a slow speed.. my muselist changes a lot, depends a lot on what i’m watching lately so bear with me please. this is a drama free zone, therefore do realise that mun ≠ muses and (obviously) writing ≠ condoning !! as a quick note, do keep in mind that my blog is my safe space, just as your blog is yours - you are responsible for your own internet experience just as i am responsible for mine. should anything in my blog annoy/trigger/squick you, i strongly encourage you to block me & not write with me - your mental health is far more important ( for me, and hopefully for you as well ) than rp. on that note, please do not softblock me - that’s annoying, just hardblock please.

『 THE TRIGGERS』

TRIGGER HEAVY, PROPERLY TAGGED AND TAKING NO CRAP

i  usually  tend to write for trigger heavy fandoms (such as asoiaf, kingdom and others) and may incorporate some of it into my writing, muses' backgrounds and overall characterization. if you're bothered \ squicked \ triggered by that, i kindly encourage you to reconsider and not follow me. no amount of rp fun is worth your mental health.  i try to tag everything accordingly and i fully expect the same courtesy for our followers' sakes. be aware that there may be mentions of death, gore, violence, consanguinamory \ endogamy (especially when it comes to the lannisters and kekkei genkai clans), rape ( kingdom, though it will only be mentioned on the character’s backstory ) and cannibalism ( hannibal and kingdom ) , as well as unhealthy relationships and dynamics alongside with powerplay, and otherwise bad behaviours.  for all that is sacred, please, do note that i, the mun, do not approve, support or condone any of these actions or behaviours !!  i simply am capable of separating fiction from reality. as long as everything is properly tagged, with mutual consent and there are no minors involved (muse and especially not muns), . i support the right of a consenting adult to explore these awful dark topics in a safe fictional environment with other like minded consenting adults, people shouldn’t have to share their traumas to strangers on the internet to explain why they write what they write, be considerate. if that notion bothers you perhaps you might not want to interact with me, for both of ours sakes. fair warning, most of my graphics and aesthetics might trigger those who have xylophobia/hylophobia (phobia of trees or wooded areas), and considering it is a main theme here i will not be tagging it, i'm sorry. but its too many. however, if you want me to create a special tag for you, there's no issue! it will be either "[your mun name] don't look!" or "[your url] don't look!", whichever you prefer. QUICK EDIT/ADDITION: i do not believe that aging up fictional characters is inherently a bad thing - from what i understand, the whole appeal of aging up a character is that while you like their personality but you do not want them to be kids (for whatever reason) but insteasd adults. if you are one of those who think that aging up a character is automatically something bad (without even knowing why it was done in the first place) don’t bother following me because i do think that opinion is quite silly.

『 THE INTERACTIONS』

OC, DUPLICATE, MULTIMUSE AND CANON DIVERGENT FRIENDLY

my tagging system is simple, i tag triggers as "tw; x" and . images that may be sensitive or triggering as "cw; x". you can further see how my tags work by taking a look at my tag dump post, just search ‘tag dump’ on my blog and you will find the most recent one i’m using.    i shitpost and talk oocly on the dash constantly but you can easily blacklist my tag if it bothers you.  here's something you should know about me:  when i'm doing drafts i usually don't feel like chatting much, so please do not spam me because i won't be able to reply, i love to talk with my moots but sometimes it overwhelms me.  on that note, please don't pester me for replies ic or ooc, i am slow and chances are that if you try to guilt trip me or just nag me about it i'll leave as the ones i'll get to in the later end on purpose, just out of spite. yes, i be like that.   please be patient - i’ll never pressure you and expect the same in return.  plotting wise: i prefer to just wing it with just a faint idea of where to take the thread but honestly i'm cool with anything. please be considerate when formatting your replies, i have a bad eyesight & if i can't read it, i won't bother with it.   my own formatting is simple and clean.   on a smaller note, please bear with me and my muses as my muses ramble a lot but you don't have to match the length, just give me something to work with. if we write together, the chances of me making edits/tagging you in stuff are really big, just lmk if you don’t like that though !

『 THE FLEET』

MOSTLY BI/PAN MUSES, MULTISHIP AND MULTIVERSE, SMUT FRIENDLY

i love shipping but i like my ships to be devices to move the plot/dynamics/muses forward, every once in a while though i partake in some much loved self indulgent shipping. just because i ship a certain pairing don't presume that my characters are approaching yours with second intentions, please.   most of the time i like to reblog those relationship memes, so if you’re interested in a ship the best way (other than  sending me a message ofc) to let me know is by sending ones. there will be some triggering ships here ( like the lannisters, both cersei x jaime and joanna x tywin are my otps, and potential inter clan ships, like with the hyugas - i mean how the hell you think they keep the byakugan in their family?? ) that may either be played with trusted friends or be mentioned/reblogged sometimes, all properly tagged so you can easily blocklist/avoid it.  most of my muses are either bi or pan, those who are not will be specified. don't be afraid to reach out to me for shipping right off the bat - i'd rather have you to be open and honest with me about the interactions you want than lying to me, just know that there will be needed some plotting and threading first to see if your muses match. as an adult, my blog is smut friendly, i partake in sexual sunday a lot because some of my muses are very lewd in nature, you can blacklist my tag if that bothers you as well.

『 THE FINAL NOTES』

GENERAL RP ETIQUETTE APPLIES, CREDITS, THANK YOU FOR READING MY RULES

lastly but not least, general rp etiquette applies on my blog: no godmodding, forced ships, etc. there’s only ONE thing that truly makes me go apeshit crazy, and it’s when people don’t read my rules. i ALWAYS find out and it’s not pretty; i block it like it’s hot, ♪ ♫ ♬ block it like it’s hot ♪ ♫ ♬.   i strongly assure you that i always read your rules before both following you and also before sending memes, just in case. on a much smaller note, i’m not so hot on single shipping and i really feel weirded out about people forcing me to pic who i’m going to interact with due to theirs DNI’s. while i get DNI’s when it comes to actual predators, when it’s something seemingly random chances are that i’ll softblock you because it weirds me out how volatile some can be when it comes to a hobby. i have some trigger heavy hcs ( for example, the one about jiraiya’s hypersexuality being rooted in trauma that he suffered at a young age ) that i share with only a few muns that are closer with me, so i’ll be mentioning them every once in a while but won’t share them, please don’t insist.  i don’t really like most of the main characters of the franchises i write for, and when it comes to certain characters  i reserve the right to decline an rp for my own comfort. for further info on what i use to make my graphics please check my “CREDITS.” tag.  most of my stuff is made by me, i’ve got a lowkey rph in case you wanna check it out it’s @brazucahelps, however if you want a custom content i can see if i get a free time to come up with something :D

 IF YOU READ THIS FAR, THANK YOU SO MUCH — JUST ONE LAST THING, COULD YOU PLS LIKE THIS SO I KNOW YOU’VE READ IT? <3 THANKS!

[ofgentleresolve-a]

@mythvoiced​ sent in: "Is that tea with a bit of Red Bull, or Red Bull with a bit of tea in it," there's a hint of a smile in their usual deadpan, as if the cause for which professor Grace seems to be on the verge of vibrating out of his skin is one noble enough to have them soften in their sympathising. "Once did a google search on the effects of Red Bull," because they truly sympathise, been there done that, "and well, for one, wish I hadn't, two, I also read that drinking water helps against caffeine jitters." And that's what the water bottle they're holding out to Patrick is for. "How about we go get some fresh air?" ((Eunjae mid-conversation with Elise: btw is your dad okay FKHL HELLO FERRE hope this is okay ;W; JUST!! felt like nyooming something in~ FEEL FREE TO IGNORE & have a lovely day ♥)) || apparently he has to get better at hiding jskdlf ( ft. unprompted )

As he’s heard his students say on more than one occasion around this time of year, desperate times call for desperate measures. Or perhaps he’s said it himself years ago back when he was a student. That seems to be a timeless experience, regardless of how the world has changed in these last twenty years. Even being on the other side of the classroom does little to ease this period of sheer panic and suffering.

A jitter runs through his spine when Mx. Eunjae addresses him. He looks up from his cup of Red Bull tea. It’s the Red Bull, definitely the caffeine along with the image of the stack of papers he’s dreading to meet again in his office. Years of knowing Mx. Eunjae has Patrick more than accustomed to the sharpness in their voice, how quickly they can switch their attention from Elise to him and vice versa. It must come with years of being a CPS worker too: observing without betraying their thoughts. After all, the best to truly know someone is to watch them in their natural state when they think no one is working. He gives them an apologetic smile. He didn’t realize they were watching him and his impatient foot tapping against the floor of the café. It’s been their meeting spot for years on end. The same spot at the same time of the month.

“You wouldn’t suppose it’d be a lie to say it’s a COMBINATION of both?” He muses, even though he knows his drink, a personal concoction he’s relied on for years to get through these three weeks of hell leans more towards the latter of Mx. Eunjae’s suggestions. They know that for a fact too, probably. After all, he’s known them for almost as long as he’s known Elise. They must have picked up on more than a few tidbits on him.

“I can’t say I have done the same, unfortunately.” He admits although he supposes he’s more than familiar, on a personal level, with the effects of a generous amount of caffeine in the system. If it’s not the jitters, it’s the parching in his throat, the inability to sleep at night, the occasional dizziness, or even the embarrassing need to use the bathroom more than once within the hour. That’s usually the worst of his symptoms although he can imagine there are worse symptoms to have. Like nausea, vomiting, irritability, an increased heart rate, or even seizures...

Patrick’s just lucky the worst of his symptoms is the occasional dizzy spell. Either that or a headache.

( Mx. Eunjae doesn’t need to know about that. Hyuk doesn’t either. )

Still, he takes the water bottle from them gratefully. His throat was getting parched despite having his thermos of tea Red Bull on hand. Twisting the cap off, he takes a sip as Mx. Eunjae begins to gather their belongings. Elise does the same, happily agreeing with her case manager’s suggestion. It’s almost amazing really, how free-spirited she’s become around Mx. Eunjae. It’s a stark contrast to the stilted conversations they shared during the early years. Still, there’s still the the rest of the hour to go before they go their separate ways only to meet back here again in the next month. Setting the water bottle on the table, he rests a hand on Elise’s shoulder before looking up at both his daughter and Mx. Eunjae.

“Why don’t you go on AHEAD with Mx. Eunjae? I still have to clean up so I’ll bring her bag out when I finish.”