#please know how beautiful the features you think are imperfections are

[lilreidgirl]

Perfect

Summary: You`re insecure and your boyfriend, Spencer, thinks the absolute world of you, he trys everything to make you see what he sees.

Warnings: fem!reader, insecure reader, bad body image, comparing to fictional charecters, kissing, hurt/comfort?, not proof read, if i forgot anything; let me know, English is not my first language

WC: ~1k

A/N: I won`t be posting for about the next two weeks cause i have three exams, once exam season finally ends, Ill be able to post my many ideas that just seem to keep on coming. Until then, here`s a short Spence hurt/comfort fic MWAH

Perfect.

A word that feels as foreign to me as an alien language. It’s something I’m definitely not. No one is perfect, of course. But I feel like I’m standing several miles farther from it than most.

Spencer calls me a lot of things: beautiful, pretty, cute, smart, hot, exquisite, funny, tantalizing, sexy, insatiable. The list is endless. If it’s complimentary, he’s said it at some point.

Except perfect.

Spencer is a man of science and logic, and logic dictates that perfection doesn’t exist. It’s an unattainable ideal, a concept too flawless to have a place in a messy world like ours. And yet, standing next to him—this near-perfect person—I feel the ache of falling so much shorter than the mark.

There are people, though, who seem to come dangerously close.

One of the many things I love about Spencer is his love for books. He reads endlessly, often with the same devotion he gives to solving puzzles or understanding the human mind. He’ll bury himself in stories until his eyes droop, refusing to let fatigue stop him from finishing just one more chapter. And I know the women in those books, how they’re described: Silky hair, impossibly soft skin, hypnotic eyes, lips meant to be kissed, figures sculpted to perfection, and smiles bright enough to light up the darkest corners.

That’s what perfection looks like, isn’t it?

It’s certainly not me.

I see myself every day in the mirror. No silky hair here—just strands that seem to have their own rebellious personality, refusing to fall in place no matter what I do. My skin? Far from flawless. My eyes? Ordinary, nothing mesmerizing about them. My lips are… lips. Not the kind poets write about. My body? Just a body. Functional. Unremarkable. My smile doesn’t light up rooms; at most, it’s enough to convey, Hi, I’m friendly, please don’t ask me for directions.

Yet somehow, here I am, dating Spencer Reid—a man who feels carved by the hands of something divine. It’s almost painful, how unfairly beautiful he is. I’ve searched for his flaws, scoured every inch of his personality, his quirks, his habits. Nothing. If they’re there, they’re too small for me to see. He’s just… him. Perfect in all the ways that I’m not.

Two soft knocks on the door break me out of my spiraling thoughts. They’re gentle yet deliberate, spaced so perfectly it feels like they were timed with precision. Of course, they were. This is Spencer we’re talking about. Even his knocks are perfect.

I drag myself toward the door, feeling the weight of my imperfections in every step. My fingers fidget with the hem of my sweater as I go. It’s oversized and rumpled, the fabric hanging well past my wrists. My sweatpants cling stubbornly to my thighs but sag around my ankles. I’m a mess, right down to the fluffy socks that glide across the floor I haven’t bothered to clean in three weeks.

When I open the door, the sight of him steals my breath as it always does. Spencer.

His hair is perfectly disheveled, a chaotic tumble of curls that somehow looks intentional. His features are sharp, striking, and utterly unfair. His eyes hold the kind of depth that makes you feel like he sees every part of you, even the parts you’d rather keep hidden.

“Hi,” he says, his voice soft and warm, and that smile—the one that makes me feel like I’m standing in the sun—graces his lips.

“Hey,” I manage, though my voice feels embarrassingly small in comparison.

“I missed you so much,” he says, stepping inside before I can respond. His arms wrap around my waist, pulling me into a hug that feels like home. He lifts me slightly, spinning us in a slow circle, and I can’t help but laugh softly at the gesture.

“Me too,” I whisper, the words barely audible as my lips brush against his neck. When he sets me down, I press a kiss to his lips. It’s brief but firm, enough to feel the spark between us ignite.

He pulls back just enough to look at me, his dark eyes roaming my face. His pupils are wide, the dim light of my apartment making them expand until they almost swallow the brown of his irises. He looks at me like I’m something precious, something worth studying and memorizing.

“God,” he breathes, his voice low and filled with something I can’t quite name. “You’re perfect.”

The air leaves my lungs. For a moment, it feels like the world has tilted on its axis. I open my mouth to respond, but the words won’t come. My thoughts are spinning, but all I can focus on is him, standing here, calling me perfect.

Could perfection exist after all? Maybe it does. Maybe it’s right here in front of me, holding me, looking at me like I’m something extraordinary.

Or maybe perfection isn’t about appearances. Maybe it’s about this feeling—this warmth that spreads through me whenever Spencer is near. Maybe it’s about the way he sees me, flaws and all, and still calls me something I never thought I could be.

Perfect. That’s him.

Perfect. The word he used to describe me.

Perfect. The way I feel, despite my imperfections, whenever I’m with him.

I blink back the tears threatening to spill, a soft laugh escaping my lips as I finally find my voice. “Mm… so are you,” I whisper, leaning into him as his arms tighten around me.

And in that moment, I believe it. I believe that maybe, just maybe, perfection isn’t about being flawless. Maybe it’s about being loved by someone who makes you feel like you are.

@emma-e-a

[buckyalpine]

Okay okay, that Wakanda Bucky imagine was soooooo hella cute 🥺❤️

Would you do a continuation of it where they live happily in the hut and maybe with some smuuuuut ? 🙊 The idea of him in that Hut, all cozy and romantic is not leaving my mind

WAKANDA BUCKY? YES, I will gladly give you more (this can be read as a standalone) There's something about Bucky in Wakanda that's just so soft and comforting to me. That sweet baby with his goats, just living in peace for the first time ever in a place where no one can hurt him. It's also the first place where he can just be himself without the pressure of worrying about anything else.

Just you and him.

He's just so in love with you; his words can only do so much. He wants to make you feel good in the most intimate way possible. He wants to physically give you what words won't translate.

He's nervous though.

He knows you love him for all of his imperfections; there's no doubt you adore every single bit of him. He has no reason to worry about what you'd think.

But this beautiful sweet boy is shy anyway.

Too shy to tell you he wants to make love. Too shy to slip his hands onto your bare skin even though he knows you wouldn't stop him. Too shy to even insinuate he wants more. Ever since you've moved into his hut, he'd wanted you closer. You cuddle every night and he loves the feel of your soft body nuzzled right by his side but its just not enough. He always tells you he loves you and how much you mean to him but it doesn't compare to the way he wants to just melt into you.

He manages to hold his tongue until one night when he just can't anymore. He's cuddled up on your chest while you both lay in his cot and he feels so safe and loved. He wants you now, more than ever. He doesn't even want to take you apart and wreck you; he just wants to love on you softly but he's not even sure if he can, I mean he only has one arm-

"What is it Buck" You whisper, carding your fingers softly through his locks, pushing back the few strands that fell from his half tied hair. "What you thinking about" you let your finger trace over his features, smoothing the crease between his brows that he makes when he's deep in thought. He blushes at you catching his mind in action, blinking with wide eyes before chewing his lip.

"I-

"What is it sweet boy" You continue to let your fingers gently dance over his face and the action makes him purr, leaning for more of your touch.

"I want you"

"You have me baby" You whisper, your heart beating a little faster wondering if he was implying what you were thinking, what you'd been wanting and craving for ages-

"No angel, I want you" He says in earnest hoping you'd understand, "I just-I'm not sure how" He looks down at himself, now afraid to meet your eyes. How could he make you feel good if he only had so much to work with. "I want to make you feel good"

He hesitantly lets his hand slide along your hip up to your waist and slipping under your shirt. The feeling of your bare skin is already so addicting, he starts to work at taking your clothes off as soon as you nod with a needy please. He finds you so unbearably gorgeous when you're naked on his bed and at one point he thinks that might be enough.

Your bare form is everything to him and he'd do anything to worship your more sacred places.

He'd be such a precious baby when it comes to you undressing him. The pink on his cheeks spreads to his ears and he can't help but gush at the way you kiss every scar and freckle on his skin when you let his robe drop to the floor.

"You're perfect" You whisper and he shakes his head because he's nothing in comparison to you. Not with all those angry red lines scattered across his chest, scars covering most of his skin.

"Not like you angel, I'm not-

"You are. Do you have any idea how beautiful you are soldier, how perfect and strong your body is" You don't let him argue, a gasp slipping past his lips when you wrap your hand around his length and start to pump. He's about to protest again because this is about you but he has no idea how long you've been waiting to do this for him.

"Please Bucky" You softly beg and he's an absolute goner when you wrap your hand around his aching length. Just when he thinks it couldn't get any better; your warm soft palm stroking him up and down, you tell him how beautiful and perfect he is and he swears he could cry.

"Look at how pretty you are baby" You coo, perched between his spread legs, leaning over to suckle the tip, humming at the taste, "Can't believe you hid this all from me for so long baby"

"Another-fuck sweets-another night, God I'll cum-you gotta stop" He whines as you release with a pop, your lips covered in his slick. He pulls you to lie down beside him, thinking about all the times he imagined making love to you. Looking into your eyes, letting his body cage you from the rest of the world, just you and him and nothing else.

But it wasn't easy with 1 arm.

"M'sorry baby, I-" Bucky stuttered, feeling unsteady as he hovered above you.

"Lay down for me" You cut off his rambling with a kiss to his lips before letting his head fall against the pillow. "Just wanna feel you Jamie, be close to you" You moan, rubbing your now dripping pussy all over his cock. "Want you inside me"

"Put my cock in you angel" Bucky's feral side made an appearance while he held his length letting you line up with the tip, the both of you gasping at the feeling of him finally pushing into you. "Fuck babydoll, wanted this so bad"

"oh fuck" You threw your head back at the feeling, all the pieces inside you coming together as you sank all the way down making you feel complete. "You feel so good inside me Bucky" You whined, grinding and rocking yourself on his thick length, feeling him in your belly.

"C'mere angel, please" He begged, reaching for you and pulling you causing you to fall onto his chest. He planted his feet and started to thrust up making you cry out. "Wanted to make love to you baby, I-fuck I love you so much, wanna make you feel so good"

"Feels-so-good-hng" You whimpered between thrusts, nipping and sucking bruises onto his neck while he held onto you tightly with his arm. "I'm-so close-

"I'll make you feel good" Bucky groaned, pushing you back up and slipping his hand between your bodies while you leaned back and held onto his thighs. You cried out as he found your clit, moaning louder with you and he toyed with your pussy.

"That feel good baby?" He panted, letting his thumb rub your clit in fast circles, your silky soft bud throbbing against the digit, "You look so pretty with my cock in you angel, cum for me, cum for me pretty girl"

It didn't take long for you to shatter around him, and Bucky followed right behind. He nearly sobbed as you collapse against his chest while he pumped you full of his load, not bothering to pull out long after his cock softened. Cuddling with you with his spent cock warm in your soaked pussy was his favorite part of the night. Nothing was more intimate than the both of you so closely connected, whispering sweet nothings while tangled under the soft sheets, the both of you falling asleep in the warm, cozy air of the hut.

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

(Un)disclosed

Based off this post I made yesterday about Hua Cheng collecting Xie Lian smut throughout the centuries. Enjoy!

Warnings: suggestive content, long post

...the ornate, white robe slid down the prince's shoulders like water, the gold embroidered silk pooling at his feet in a glittering heap. He looked up at the commoner, a coy look in his eyes as he gauged the other's reaction. His skin, perfectly stretched over his form, bore no markings or imperfections, flawless just like the other had expected it to be. His neck and the tops of his shoulders turned a very light pink, just like the apples of his cheeks.

It was a sight equal parts beautiful as it was arousing, so overwhelming that the commoner fell to their knees as if in worship. "Your Highness..." they spoke, voice reverent, eyes glinting with adoration as they stared up at their prince. "I don't deserve to look at you like this, you're-"

The prince's hand came to cup their face, looking down at them with gentleness and a subtle hint of something dark and hungry in his eyes. "Earn it then."

"How, Your Highness?"

The prince carded a hand through their hair and took one step closer. "You know how."

"I don't, my prince, I know nothing." The commoner whined, so willing to please their voice shook. "Please, won't Your Highness teach this lowly one?"

"Open your mouth."

Xie Lian shut the small book with such a powerful thud that the brittle pages nearly clapped between the old, hard covers. His face burned with shame, fingers trembling as he placed the offending item back on the shelf he had taken it from, all but shoving it into position.

Xie Lian had never read such a shameful text before - granted, erotic art and writing never interested him and so he never looked at any of it, especially considering the requirements of his cultivation path - but to think the first ever he would lay eyes upon would be one of himself was far too ironic!

He should have known not to snoop around Paradise Manor when Hua Cheng was not there - but he became antsy in the ghost king's absence and even a little lonely, so what was he to do but try to explore the nooks and crannies of his husband's abode?

But though he had started off thinking he might find peculiar items, explicit stories of himself definitely exceeded all of his expectations.

It was likely Hua Cheng had stored that book away to ensure no such inappropriate and perverse stories circulated to soil Xie Lian's reputation further - of course whoever had to have written such things did it to make fun of Xie Lian, most likely after his fall, turning his image into one of a salacious lover rather than an ascetic god for the sake of mockery.

With a sigh, Xie Lian calmed hid shaking hands and reached for a second book, hoping to find solace in another story that would be as fascinating and enrapturing as the many pieces of literature Hua Cheng kept in the Manor's main library.

Opening another small book, this time a red one, Xie Lian flipped through the pages until he reached tge one where the book's spine had broken. That page must have been read often!

"Your Highness, this humble one is-"

"Silence." The prince's authoritative voice rang through the main hall of the palace. "Have I allowed you to speak at all?"

Their eyes widened and they swallowed dryly, looking up at Xie Lian with tearful eyes. The kind, gentle smile and soft gaze had been replaced with a sharp, cold look, the very picture of authority and respect a crown prince should be. His features did not look any less regal, though, even anger and disdain fitting his handsome face.

"N-no, Your Highness..." they replied at last, voice quivering with fear. "Please punish me... I've wronged you too much, my prince, I've been disobedient and audacious..."

A small, barely there smile pulled at the prince's lips, a dangerous look in his eyes.

"What punishment would be fit for the likes of you, then?" He asked, voice almost playful had it not been so dark.

"Kill me, Your Highness..." their voice came, small and fearful. "I deserve to die..."

"It would be a waste, though." The prince quickly intervened, taking slow, small strides around the other. "A waste of a good servant, and a waste of a good body."

Their eyes widened, following the young royal's movements until they could no longer turn their head, Xie Lian now standing behind them.

"I have decided on your punishment." He spoke, tone low, so close that his lips nearly touched the other's ear. "And you will take it - and like it."

Xie Lian dropped the red book to the floor with a small yelp, so embarrassed he felt like he could have burst in flames. Had his people truly seen him in such a shameful way?! Had it been lust and desire that he instilled in their hearts rather than righteousness and grace?!

Xie Lian couldn't possibly remember of any instance where he had behaved suggestively as a young crown prince, not to mention he had never shared a bed with anybody until he married his now husband, Hua Cheng. Why would people come up with such terrible stories about him if they had no root in reality? And to think they could be so vastly different... he had been portrayed as wanton but gentle in the first one, only to be turned into a depraved royal in the second! Had he truly instilled such fantasies?

With a defeated sigh, Xie Lian sat on the small chair beside the reading table in the corner of the room, folding his arms on it to lay his head down and hide his burning cheeks. Could he be considering himself grateful that Hua Cheng had locked all of these away or even more ashamed thinking perhaps Hua Cheng had read them?

Xie Lian hoped the ghost king hadn't... he did respect Xie Lian greatly, but Xie Lian knew what kind of perversions his beloved could conjure in their bed (and other places, some more creative than others!)... could he have read all of these terrible stories himself?

Xie Lian felt even more flustered at that thought, and lifted his head from the table, trying to stir his attention elsewhere. His eyes fell upon another small book, an incospicuous black one with a red tassel bookmark halfway in it.

Hua Cheng had definitely begun reading that one, so Xie Lian hoped it was a normal book this time and not another pornographic depiction of the crown prince of Xianle taking someone to bed more or less gently.

The creature had to have been some kind of ghost, a powerful thing wielding a sort of dark energy that acted as both its limbs and life force. Whatever had willed it into existence must have been angry and resentful, the dark forest reverberating with growls and haunting moans as it skittered among the trees like a feral beast.

The young prince did not have the time to react this time, though, and he failed to dodge the many winding limbs stretching towards him - and so, despite his valiant efforts, his arms were bound above his head, pulled taught, and his legs, though kicking, had been spread apart and held in place by the creature's tentacles. This way, his spine bowed forward, arching against the merciless ghost's hold, writhing incessantly in an attempt to escape.

He put his whole strength into every attempt to free his limbs, thrashing like a fly caught in a spider's web, but all he managed to do was tire himself out, breathing heavily as sweat glistened down his body, soaking the remaining tatters of his clothes and making them stick slightily to his skin.

His guan had long been lost in the fight, and so his long hair flowed down his back nearly to his knees, further sticking to the sweat dripping down his back and making him overheat even more.

When it had become apparent to him that struggling was futile, Xie Lian tried calling out for help - but the beast had lured him too deep into the forest for anybody to hear, and so he had given that up quickly as well.

There was no more time to think, his heartbeat picking up as he felt two of those ghostly limbs suddenly caress his neck, one wrapping around it whilst the other slid up and down his chest, tearing the material of his robe.

But when Xie Lian tried to struggle, the limb around his neck tightened until breath could no longer fill his lungs, so he stilled, watching with wide eyes as the tentacle tore at his clothing, leaving him bare.

It wasn't until two other limbs slid up his thighs that the prince realized what was going to happen to him, one of them wrapping around his-

"Gege?"

Hua Cheng's soft voice tore Xie Lian's attention from the story and he immediately fumbled to close the book, his shaking fingers barely managing not to drop it.

"S-S-San Lang!" He shakily replied, feeling as if he had been caught doing something unmentionable. "What are you..." he cleared his throat, realizing he sounded high-pitched, "What are you doing here? You're back early!"

"I am not...?" The ghost king spoke, a controlled expression on his face as he continued, "It is past midnight."

"Ah. I must've not noticed..." came the sheepish response. "I've been...uh...reading..."

"I see..."

A long stretch of silence followed, neither of the two daring to say anything or even gaze at one another for more than a few seconds. It seemed that they both shared an understanding of what they should have been addressing but neither had the courage to speak up.

It was Hua Cheng that did, though, when the quiet became unbearable.

"Gege, I'm sorry..." his expression became ashamed, saddened even. "I understand if you find me repulsive now-"

"San Lang, did I not tell you I could never find you repulsive?" Xie Lian spoke, his voice soft, "I just wish to understand. What are these books? Why have you been collecting them?"

Hua Cheng swallowed, feeling every bit as mortified as Xie Lian did, even though his demeanour didn't betray much.

"Gege knows I have loved him for over eight centuries but I have not had the honor to stand by his side until recently. Despite this, my love for you never faltered - it grew and developed to what you know it to be today. This also means I have lusted after you as well."

Which, in truth, Xie Lian was not exactly surprised about. It was a given, after all, and it wasn't as though they didn't have sex nearly every night - all that desire had to have come from the same place the love did.

"So... I have found a...niche of writers that created these... erotic stories about his highness, the crown prince of Xianle, and...I have kept them for my own...use."

"Use?" Xie Lian quickly parroted, feeling a strange heat pool in his stomach.

"Yes. I am sure gege knows what I mean..."

Xie Lian's eyes drifted towards the black book and the red tassel that lay in it. "Is that one your favorite?"

"One of them." Came the strained reply, Hua Cheng's voice betraying a feeling of both vulnerability and excitement.

"I see." Xie Lian looked up the tall shelf, stretching nearly to the ceiling, and he couldn't suppress a small, muschevous smile as he leaned against the table on his palm, toying with the ring on his necklace with the other. "Then, would San Lang wish to share his other favorites with me, then?"

"Yes, Your Highness."

[lightningant]

I've never seen characterizations of Tom and Harry the way yours is. I love how neurotic and messed up they both are -- they're *SO CUTE* too. <3 <3 <3

Tom is just so exhausted and cynical and Harry is a manic catastrophe with sooo many crossed wires and they're HILARIOUS. XD

And just so well written, I cannot tell you how distracted I was for at least a week after I read what you had for your fic -- I truly, truly admire your narration and dialogue and characterizations (I already said that but PLEASE I LOVE THEM SO **BAD** >O< ) Soooo funny and well made.

They're realistic! Tom and Harry are so messy and also normal people at the end of the day who make mistakes and aren't super cool all the time (really, they're utter dorks, and you TOTALLY show thatt) but also they're competent and scary and stubborn and you just have suchh a nice blend of their facets and I JUST....aghhh, I love itt.

Also I ADORE your designs -- I love how Tom is so sickly and neat (you said it best "Victorian child with tuberculosis" LMAO), and Harry is so IDK, he's just a Guy but in the most wonderful way -- I'm not actually good with words :,))))

I just love your art style in general, it's like, realistic yknow. You don't get rid of normal people "imperfections", they're a part of the design or enhance them -- I don't think the word imperfections is right, I just mean like, you don't exclude non-conventionally attractive aspects of bodies or facial expressions??? Idk, I'm trying here, I really am. Just, just, just I like it a lot and I wanna be like that toooooo >.<

IIIIIIII dunno if I have accurately gotten anything across or even given an actual good compliment in this entire thing but anyways you're very cool and awesome and also PLEASE forget that I said they were Babygirl I've never used that word before in my LIFEE and don't know if that was right at all -- if it was nevermind I meant it all and am so cool -- ANYWAYS bye :,)

I don't think I've succeeded in lessening my embarrassment but uhhhhh, I hope I've at least articulated myself better :,)))

Askbomb swag. Thank you, this message was so sweet :) I shall try to match energies.

One of the things I love most is that the kind of person who puts up pretensions is, innately, trying to hide something about themselves they find sub-par. Tom isn't just a scary and incredibly powerful domineering sigma male who is a master manipulator, he is a person who is actively attempting to turn himself into that man, and in my fic he is still a teenager and still tripping his way through that mental image he has of himself. The two worst ages to ever be are 15 and 20; fifteen, when you are ready to shed childhood but don't know what maturity looks like just yet, and 20, when you are ready to become your own person and achieve adulthood, picking your way across existence-defining beliefs. And his only friend for the past like, 7 months? has been his 16-year-old self who has the single-minded objective of looking cool and mature to his adult self. A hell of his own making.

Harry is also 20. He is one of those 'unusually mature for his age' kids and he has an inflated sense of his own righteousness and capability, despite being the actual one with the emotional range of a teaspoon (he just knows to keep it himself). There is no way Harry would detect he is having a manic fit, especially if he is having one that is triggered by his arrested feelings on Sirius. It's incredibly fun writing him perform this extremely risky and reality-altering plan and his plan was "idk, kill him?" and picking shit up off the ground whenever he sees it, the DADA position included. our hero.

Beautiful tragic terminally ill gothic prince / fit jock is really a match made in heaven aesthetically. Cannot get enough of it

Thank you for art compliment too ^_^ I used to lean more to anime fandoms so Harry Potter really let me stretch my legs on more 'normal people' facial features like big noses and soft chins and I'm glad it's clear how much fun I'm having doing that. Yay! Though one of the compliments I've always gotten that I've always been proud of is how distinct the way I draw expressions is.

No no...you're right. Tom is absolutely a babygirl. And Harry...well he was certainly Ginny's babygirl, and I'm sure a part of him is really itching to have someone put their hand on the small of his back 😔

[sixlane]

lane u can't just say "pandoralecto" and leave it at that i need to know more please

it seems i’m incapable of talking about pairings without making a moodboard recently… but anyways YES let me tell you about them.

alecto is our resident radfem man-hating lesbian who can’t help but conform to patriarchal ideals in her quest to redeem herself and her family in the eyes of the rich elite. she’s mean and selfish and brutal yet she still cares what others think of her. pandora on the other hand could not give less of a fuck what anyone is saying about her, yet she just happens to be this (on the outside) “perfect woman.” she’s blonde and beautiful with delicate features and she’s rich and she throws elaborate parties that everyone who’s anyone is invited to. and she does it just because she wants to. pandora has never done a single thing she didnt want to do, and she’s praised for it. people don’t seem to care that she’s blunt and apathetic because she’s beautiful and alecto hates her for this. but she also wants to be her. she becomes jealously obsessed with pandora and somewhere along the way that blurs into lust. and it’s so ugly and gross but she wants to literally cut pandora open and wear her skin. she can’t help it.

then we have pandora, who is just living her life carefree exactly the way she wants to and there’s alecto standing in the corner of her party with an untouched martini just glaring at everyone. and pandora is like. what is her problem? alecto is so full of rage and pandora cannot understand how a person can hold so much inside of them and she doesn’t like it. she thinks alecto has the most massive stick up her ass and her failure to understand this woman bleeds into disdain for her. but it also means pandora cannot get alecto out of her head. she’s a natural observer and she finds herself to be so fascinated by other people because she’s so different from them. she’s low empathy like her brother but entranced by the way people interact with each other in a normative context. she cannot for the life of her understand why alecto cares so much about anything but for some reason she can’t get herself to leave alecto alone. their whole relationship is pandora doing things to get reactions out of alecto. good or bad. seeing what will make her tick. constantly antagonizing her. she’s obsessed with alecto just as much as alecto is obsessed with her. she wants to break her so bad.

their fighting turns into violent make outs which lead to creepy power-play sex. who will get the upper hand. it’s a fight to the death. they’re both trying to rip the other open.

also i thought it would be interesting to explore their relationship in the context of both of them being in some type of weird codependent twincest relationship. they don’t hinge on this but like pandoras relationship with evan is about belonging and alecto’s relationship with amycus is about dominating. so i think the pandoralecto sexual dynamic would be flipped. alecto finds their violent sex dynamic surprisingly fulfilling because it’s equal. they’re both women!! she’s not performing. she’s at her most feral and imperfect and pandora still wants her in some weird way. she feels more comfortable taking on a submissive role because she doesn’t have to uphold this power over pandora that she feels she has to uphold when she has sex with men. for pandora sex with her brother is not about sex. it’s very intimate and like. idk something otherworldly. but sex with alecto is about sex. it’s lust and obsession. i think she realizes that alecto has never not been in control and she wants to flip that. she wants to get on top of alecto and see what happens. she takes the reins because alecto has always had an iron grip on them.

tl;dr: they’re feral and they hate each other and they’re obsessed with each other at the same time. they both have an inability to let things go once they’ve zeroed in and that’s what drives this dynamic. they just can’t stop!

[sporesgalaxy]

I know this is something u were probably asked before but as the guy that has a good relationship with art....how do you do that??? I mean I get that this question is vague but how do you not care if it looks bad? Do you just?? Keep on going till it looks like you want it to look? Despite the agonies? You seem like you enjoy talking abt this thats why im asking, dont feel the need to answer if u dont wanna

hmmmm. You know, I don't think about the agonies much these days. But it's not that I don't care. I guess I've become a freak who sees beauty in the agonies, sorta? It's kind of complicated! I will do my best to explain!

First of all, I know that I have the unfair advantage of having no ambition. I don't have a goal for my art besides making art when I feel like it. That makes it easy to be less judgemental-- I remember having a rockier relationship to my own art during the time when I thought I would make it my career.

This is why I like talking about my perspective, though!! I think it's important to try not to let yourself be consumed by self-criticism as an artist, even if self-criticism is necessary for you, and hopefully my carefree way of looking at things can help balance things out haha.

Anyways, ambition or not-- and I know how this sounds but bear with me-- art doesn't ever look bad.

(Barring ethically harmful art, ugh, I don't want to get into ethics so just-- surely you know what I mean!!!)

Art gets a lot less stressful if you can tell yourself that no art is bad, and remember the reasoning behind that until you really believe it. It isn't a fast process, but it's very worth the work.

The truth is that art either looks how you want it to look, or it looks different from the way you want it to look, but both are ultimately neutral. You CAN make art that looks different from what you wanted, that you still feel pleased with.

When art looks different from how you wanted, the gut reaction you have is often to call it bad or get frustrated. And of course it's frustrating! Maybe you feel it's not as effective at communicating something as you'd hoped, or you feel it's not as visually impactful as you imagined...but it's important to remember those things are only your perception. Not an objective fact. And art is a two-way street! A communication between creator and observer! And communication is really weird and complicated.

•••

Other people's perception of your work won't ever be exactly the same as yours. Sometimes this is desireable and sometimes it isn't! Maybe your art will communicate the thing better to someone than anything they've ever seen-- even if a more effective version could theoretically exist, the "imperfect" version that actually exists and communicates is all that matters to the observer. Or, maybe a feature that turned out exactly how you wanted it to will fly completely over an observer's head, and not have the effect you wanted at all. A lot of the time, you'll never even know.

An artist can NEVER fully control an observer's perspective, so at a certain point you have to live with what you have. You already do this, to some degree, if you have ever EVER decided to stop working on a piece of art and share it. You can always keep adding to something. You can always keep editing. But sometimes, you stop. And perfection doesn't exist, so when you stop it must be because the art is good enough for now. And nothing about "good enough" is objective!

And is that really so bad? Surely people who grow fruit understand that a fruit which is smaller than they imagined can still feed somebody-- that at the very least it will feed bugs and microorganisms and be useful as fertilizer to grow more apples. Your art still means something, still accomplishes something, is still worth making whether it turns out how you imagined or not.

A lot of art is learning when to quit and move on. As a habitual perfectionist, this was something I had to learn early, to stop myself from erasing holes into every piece of paper I drew on.

There's this rule I was taught in middle school drama class: if you fuck up, act like you didn't fuck up. The audience doesn't have your script memorized, so odds are they won't have any idea you fucked up unless you tell them. Other art works the same way. No one knows what you wanted to make but you. And more importantly, a "perfect" version of your art doesn't exist (no "perfect" version of anyone's art exists, or ever will).

The version you made exists, so you have to find what's worth loving about that version. You have found what's worth loving in the imperfect art of others many times. Many observers will treat your art the same way you treat others' art. Why not treat your own art that way, too?

It sounds really REALLY corny, but I try not to think of this as embracing "mistakes." I think of it as celebrating coincidences.

I really really like coincidences. I like that every circumstance wasn't guaranteed to happen, that everything comes down to chance. I think all the little random things are beautiful because they turned out however they did, and not any of the millions of other ways things might have turned out. It's a coincidence that my genes expressed the way they did. It's a coincidence that my parents met in college. It's a coincidence that my oldest friend and I both got to middle school early every day, and stayed close even when we didn't share any classes.

Art is full of coincidences! I try to draw a straight line. The line does not turn out straight, because of the way my hand is shaped and the way my muscles contracted, because my body is not exactly like anyone else's in the world. No one else would have drawn that slightly not-straight line just exactly how I did. It's mine, and it's crookedness is what makes my art mine. Okay, maybe it's a little too crooked for what I want this time-- I'll erase it and draw a new crooked line at a bit of a different angle. There we go, I like that! Now it's my beautiful, irreplaceable crooked line! And the ghost of its predecessor guides the eye just so, and no one else's two crooked lines would guide your eye the same way, only mine! Isn't that nice on its own? Just to have made something that can't ever be replicated? To have made something no one else has ever made before?

You can also apply this in a bit less dreamy and more practical ways, I promise haha.

For example...I've never been a canvas flipper, as a digital character artist. I don't mirror my canvases to see if they still look preportional to me from either direction. I also don't usually draw visual novel character sprites that need to look good mirrored in either direction to serve their function, so it's never been a practical concern of mine.

I consider many kinds of distortion on a character I've drawn to be a good part of the visual flow of the image. Like a smear frame in animation, distoriton in the right places can make character art look dynamic and energized because it can lead the eye through a certain visual flow over the form of the character. If I were to flip the canvas, that eye-leading effect might hit differently because my American eye is used to reading from left to right-- perhaps it doesn't feel as "smooth" going in the opposite direction. This doesn't mean I need to change the distortion necessarily, it just means I prefer not to flip the canvas.

Often, these distortions aren't intentional. They're a coincidence of how my muscles move as I draw, and the areas my left-to-right American eyeballs instinctively pay more attention to. But the effect is still desireable to me. So, happy coincidence!

I think...that's the best I've got for now? Feel free to ask for clarification. I hope it's not total nonsense!

[mchlgayser]

Please can you do a : Chubby! Reader x Jude Bellingham

Fluff or smut or both no matter :)

Like I really need it

𝐂𝐔𝐃𝐃𝐋𝐘 ft jude bellingham

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Just Jude being extra cuddly with you.

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff / ✮

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: none

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: Thank you for this one special request anon! I'll try my best and fulfill this to the fullest (even though it is short). I wanna thank you all that's been requesting from one shot to another, I appreciate it a lot! I hope you have fun reading this and have a great day/night ahead! xoxo

You were cooking in the kitchen with your apron on when a hand suddenly snaked around your form, you chuckle and swiftly turn your head around 'Morning, Judy!' You shafts, turning around, and went to peck his lip 'Morning, Godhead!' He caressed your hand before he left your figure to the fridge and grab a bottle of juice 'You want some?' You hum ushering him to ready plates on the island's top 'Yes please, the food is almost ready as well!' You topped two pancakes on his plates and did the same to yours 'What toppings would you like?' You asked referring to the maple syrup and the chocolate one.

He points towards the chocolate syrup and you pour some on him and put the maple syrup on yours. You two settles down and chucked in to the breakfast 'You got practice today?' You asked cutting on your pancake as you bit it down.

'No, I asked for a day off. Want to spend time with my favorite' He playfully bops your chin using his fingers and you blush 'Yes, thanks. I needed that.' He laughs before continue consuming.

It is now three in the afternoon, you and Jude are in bed cuddling with each other, a laptop on his lap as you two focused on the movie ahead.

'Jude, I need to get up. I got to do my assignments!' He whines tightening his grasp around you 'No! I want to stay like this longer! You are so nice to hold!' He commented, tightening even impossibly closer to you, his chest on your side as he wiggle around like a youngster. You huff at him, pouting a little 'But you said that on our second movie. This movie is our third and almost ended!' His frown deepens 'Do you not love me anymore, Y/n?' He asked like a pretend broken child making you awed 'Of course, I do. But I got works--'

'Then stay.' He ordered wrapping an arm around your neck and bringing your head to his chest in an attempt to joke around but you wheeze 'I can't breathe!' He immediately lets go and you laugh 'That hurts, Jude idiot!' You bashed joining him in a small laugh.

You two indeed stay around for another three to four movies after that with Jude being extra cuddly than usual.

'Why're you so unusually cuddly today?' You asked letting him lay down on your belly 'Just because.' You look at him with a knowing look making him exasperatedly sigh

'I love you, you know that?' Your eyes widen at the sudden outburst but you chuckle either way 'Of course I do, why are you asking such a foolish question, Jude?'

'Then stop bashing your form and look so much. You are my baby girl because I love you for who you are. Never get insecure about what other people say. I don't want to see you go downhill because of how you look. I think...No I know, you are perfect like this, just the way you are. You are the most beautiful woman I've met in my entire life after my mom. Your kind heart, your pure soul, your striking feature, and your glowing skin. I love everything about you. I mean, everything. If you dare hate any of your imperfections it means you dare to hate me. Your one and only. Understood? I love you...' He singsongs the last sentence and pounces you to the bed giving you kisses all over your face and hugging you hiding in the crook of your neck

'I'm the luckiest man alive!'

[keepthyfaithandthylight]

Dear friends,

Once again I feel moved to speak on something. I am coming from a place, now, of a wilderness. Of screaming and tearing out your hair and clawing at your skin till your throat is raw and you’re bleeding, blood under your nails and in the sand. There is no season of life I’ve ever seen in my short time here on this side of eternity, no period of life where I’ve known such pain. Such desperation.

And yes, in all truth, such fear and terror.

So forgive me if this post is coming off as blunt, as vulnerable and raw. Because I am. I despise getting like this anywhere.

Please, dear friends, though you’ve read that part of the post, I wish for you to pay the most attention to this portion. No matter who you are, what you’ve done, where you’ve been, all of these things are trivial in comparison to the mercy of God. I’ve experienced it firsthand. While Saint-Just wrote of knowing God by His miracles, I know God by His mercy. His relentless and unending love, provision, strength and kindness. All of this, along with His miracles. There have been times when I have not known how I would eat that day, unsure of when a paycheck would arrive, and miraculously I managed to find enough money to but a small dinner, or a paycheck would arrive and I could eat.

While I have not known much trouble, or many tribulations, I have still weathered a storm or two. My only reason for survival was the Lord.

If there is one thing I desperately hope for you to glean from this post, it’s this: Do not ever doubt God’s love for you, do not ever doubt that you are valued and needed. The same God who created the trees, the oceans, mountains and skies thought that the world should have you, too. You are not here by accident, planned or unplanned. You were made intentionally.

Never doubt your beauty, in all of its uniqueness. Your features were handcrafted by the One who made the stars. They suit you beautifully, both He and I think so. Nothing about you is a mistake, not your nose, your teeth, your eyes, your hair, your height. You were expertly made by the world’s greatest artist and craftsman.

While some people may close their hearts and minds to you in the church, for whatever reason, Jesus does not. Neither will I. Both He and I love you immensely (though, there is no way I could ever hope to love you with as much intensity as the Lord, though I love you all with all of my heart. It is still a fallen world from an imperfect heart on my part). My arms are open to you, and my heart, and it is only a shadow of that of the Lord Jesus. Jesus endured the pain of the cross because He saw you on the other side. He was thinking of you and thought that yes, you are worth it.

So no matter what this world tells you, always remember. The One who is above all things thinks you are fearfully and wonderfully made, and that you are valuable. That you are worth enduring the pain of the cross. He thinks that you are not a mistake, that you are a wonderful creation, and His love will never end towards you. He sincerely wishes for you to be in paradise with Him for all eternity, no matter who you are or what you’ve done. You just have to trust Him and take Him up on His offer (psst, it’s free. The price has already been paid). He loves you beyond measure.

And I love you with all of the capability that my flawed, mortal and fractured heart can.

[girlwithwolftatoo]

hc of the moon boys with an s/o that feels self conscious during sex, how would they help them relax and get off?

Moon boys + wholesome stuff gives me life.

Steven Grant:

*He adores showing you love and praise, so he may trigger your self consciousness without knowing. But Steven is a good observer, and as soon as he notices something's not quite right, he'll ask you about it.

*Soft smooches on your face is his main attack to help you relax, while reminding you how lovely and great you are.

*Praise, praise, praise. He'll talk wonders about your appearence and how perfect you're for him while going slow and nice. Remember, Steven isn't well aware of his body and how it actually looks (all those remarkings about Marc's good looks can give you a clue for this), so he perceives you as "too much beautiful to be with him" and he feels like blessed with your presence.

*Steven does this so well you quickly forget about your "flaws" and lack of self confidence. He can make you feel loved and adored, the way he sees you and kisses you and holds you just confirms his thoughts and feelings towards you, and it helps to brush the stress away and make you wrog comfy with yourself with every new encounter.

Marc Spector:

*As usually, Marc doesn't like to emphasize in physical features on you or himself. He's aware of how he looks, but the least thing he wants to do is giving you extra pressure for fitting in a unnecesary beauty standard, he loves you just like you are.

*But being naked makes people feel vulnerable in any situation, and when you curl and try to hide from him using your hands or nearby pillows and blankets, he can either imagine you're scared (if it's your first time together) or you are embarrased of yourself -which for Marc, has no reason to.

*"Baby, look at me" he asks, cupping your face and deep staring at your eyes "We can stop whenever you need, but please... could you give me a chance to show you something?" He'll kiss you from the tip of your fingers to the back of your hand, holding it against his cheek as his free hand travels through your arm, gently caressing your skin. "I'd wish you could see what I see" he mutters under his breath, eyes bright like filled with stars "That you could see how perfect you are"

*Marc doesn't talk as much as Steven, he rather leaves his actions speak his mind out. He even allows you to cover a little if you don't feel specially comfy showing some things and he'll simply touch you under the blanket. But when you grow more confident, he'll ask you to see you.

Jake Lockley:

*This man has a thing for everything about you, including your body. Are you thin and slim? Great. Are you curvy and chubby? Magnificent. You have marks on your skin? Well, who doesn't? You forgot to shave? How could he care about it when he's about to grab your waist and sit you on his dick to pound into you like you deserve to?

*His action plan is making something different to Marc or Steven. He knows it's hard to not be so aware of someone's looks, so he rather points them when you do it (not before) and say something positive or even funny about it. "Wait, Jake-" you shut, using your hand to cover something. "What is it?" he wants to know, and gently makes you lift your hand. He simply smiles and plants a kiss on that weird-looking mole. "You know how these are named in Spanish?" you shook your head. "Lunares" he answers "Because people think these are related to the Moon"

*Because Jake loves having his hands on you at any chance, it slowly helps you to feel less stressed during sexy time. Like in a daily basis, he'll grab your legs and hips and feet and whatever he can lay his hands on, along with nice, reassuring words. He doesn't want you to be oblivious of your appearence, he wants you to love it just as he does.

*If things get complicated, he'll hapily show you his own scars and physical imperfections, asking you if you love him less because of them. "You see, mi amor? How could I stop loving you when you're sl gorgeous?"

[narumika]

hi hi!! can I request hcs of arashi with a s/o thats insecure abt their body ? dont forget to take care of yourself and drink water !!! thank u ^^

୨୧ tags : @nnatsume @yumetokashite

୨୧ cw insecurities, self depreciation. tooth rotting fluff, got a little personal damn

it was right before a date with you and your girlfriend, arashi. you prodding and poking at yourself in the mirror while looking over every blemish and imperfect feature. you tried to avoid this, avoid feeling yourself break at the seams, try to listen to past reassurances from your partner, but your mirror was something that was needed to finish putting on the last pieces of your outfit.

your eyes blurring from the tears and feeling sore from the grip you had on certain parts, specifically your thigh. a mole that seemed placed incorrectly was picking and eating away at you, thoughts jumping from "why does it look like that?" to "why am i worrying? it's not like anyone will see. stop overreacting you dramatic baby." neither of these thoughts helping to calm you though.

after the long time of examining yourself in the mirror you sat on your bed, feeling exhausted and drained after all of the self hatred you thought of, not even noticing how late it had gotten. arashi, after about 5 minutes, burst through your door sweating, panting, and worried. "{NAME}! oh my god you're alright." she pulled you in, not yet noticing your tear stained face and red eyes. lifting your head up, she finally got a good look at your face as a look of pity painted her features.

"{NAME}.. you've been getting into your head again, that's why you were late." she pulled away to shrug off her jacket, then pulling you in again. her hands took yours and started rubbing your knuckles, as she asked "what spiked the thoughts this time, if you don't mind me asking?" you told her about the mole, then about more and more things about your appearance that has been bothering you. "the mole on my thigh doesn't look right, the way my clothes fit isn't right, the way my hair is done doesn't match my outfit, i look ugly. i'm not fit to be dating someone as beautiful-" she put a finger to your lips before starting up again. "you're just as perfect as i am, dearest. please don't put yourself down just to lift me up, all of the things you're saying about yourself or what you're thinking are farther than the truth. you're the most lovely person i've ever met and you've got an amazing personality to go with it. you're prettier than anybody i've ever seen darling and i want you to remember that. just because some people point out certain parts, or some parts don't look perfect, doesn't mean you as a whole is an ugly person. nobody is perfect, but i think you'd make an exception. you're beautiful, smart, kind, and are stronger than most people i know."

you felt your cheeks sting with every tear that fell, squeezing arashi in a hug after and muttering a small "thank you." she separated you two and peppered your face in kisses before standing up and helping you up as well. "do you wanna go watch {your favorite movie} and cuddle?" you nodded and squeezed her hand, she squeezed back as she got your softest blanket off your bed and led you to the living room.

[sugarsweb]

Tatsumi Kazehaya x Fem!Reader

LET ME SHOW YOU. You're feeling insecure, and Tatsumi knows just the trick to make you feel better. (Originally posted Sep 23rd)

Contains : Very light NSFW, groping, body worship, Fem!Reader, not proofread

Word Count : <1000

18+ content underneath the cut. By clicking 'Keep Reading' you are knowingly reading content made for people over the age of 18. Read at your own discretion.

You wipe your makeup off, sighing as your day is finally over. The city is quiet, the moon has risen and the stars twinkle in the sky - it feels like you can get a breath of fresh air. You look at yourself in the mirror, looking at your features; your beauty marks feel like they’re almost highlighted, as you’ve finally removed the rest of the foundation from your face and you can finally scrutinise every imperfect spot on your body.  

Your insecurities scream back at you as you stare at yourself - why can’t you just have a smooth, clear skin like the others? You’d give just about anything not to feel self-conscious about your marks as they litter over various spots on your skin. 

Just when you feel the back of your eyes pricking with tears, your boyfriend’s voice sounds out from the other side of the closed bathroom door. 

“Darling?” He says. “Are you alright?” 

You wipe any remnants of your negative feelings off from your face, opening the door and peeking to see Tatsumi smiling down at you. 

“There you are, I was getting worried. You didn’t really talk during dinner, so I assumed…” 

“No, don’t worry,” You give him a small smile in return, “I’m fine. Just a little nausea, is all.” 

You feel bad about lying, but you think to yourself that your lover wouldn’t understand your feelings about your insecurities. Not like it’s his problem, anyway. 

Tatsumi nods to your answer, albeit hesitantly. You know he doesn’t fully believe you, but he drops the topic for now, getting ready for his nightly routine as you walk out of your shared bathroom. You decide to change while he’s not looking, taking your work shirt off to exchange it with one of his old t-shirts that you use to sleep in. As you take your pants off and prepare to switch into your sleeping shorts, your eye catches one of your beauty marks on your leg, and you feel your stomach twist. 

Your moving pauses, and you just stare at it, your mind running wild once more. Tatsumi walks back out of the bathroom, but you don’t notice how he catches you staring at yourself. As he watches you inspecting your skin, he finally understands what’s going on. 

He makes his way onto the bed, where you’re sitting with your back facing him as you sit on your side of the bed, still lost in your thoughts. You nearly jump out of your skin at your boyfriend’s gentle touch, his hands rubbing your shoulders in a weak massage. His head rests in between the crook of your neck, and he leaves a kiss right where one of your beauty marks resides. His warm lips against your skin makes a pleasant shiver run down your spine. Tatsumi hums, his hands moving to where your own rest in between your thighs.

“Please, tell me what’s wrong.” He speaks gently into your ear, kissing the shell of it as he lets you speak. 

You don’t even know where to start. 

“Why can’t I just… have perfect skin like the rest of them?” You say. “Without these marks all over me - they’re just stupid spots all over me, and I know it sounds dumb when I say it out loud, but…” 

You trail off, trying to stop yourself from crying as the tears once again prick at the back of your eyes. You turn to your boyfriend, your hand coming up to stroke his face. The two moles underneath his left eye are somehow still visible in the moonlight pouring into your room, and you assume your marks are just as visible as well. 

“Yours are perfectly placed, like some kind of painting. But mine… they’re just spotty.” You finish your rant, your hand falling back into your lap, turning your head away from him once more. 

Tatsumi is oddly quiet, and you’re about to check to see if he’s fallen asleep (god knows he needs it), but then he starts sucking at your neck, right below the beauty mark he had previously kissed. You gasp at the sudden action, and his hands start delicately trailing your body, as if he’s trying to memorise it by touch alone. 

He pulls away after leaving a mark on your neck, and his voice leaves goosebumps along your skin. 

“You’re beautiful, darling.” He says ever-so-sweetly. He moves to make room for you on the bed, gently lowering you onto your back and taking your (or his, really) t-shirt off. 

Once your skin is exposed, he kisses a beauty mark right on your collarbone as his left hand gently trails along your neck, leaving feather-light touches in its wake. The sensation is soft, yet truly intimate, as it continues down further to cup your breast. 

“I want to kiss every beauty spot on your skin,” He says after pulling away from another gentle kiss on your chest. “I want you to feel good about yourself, because these marks are a part of you, and they’re gorgeous - just like the rest of you is.” 

Your face heats up at his words, and it’s hard not to smile. Tatsumi gives you one as well, going back to leaving short and light kisses to every mark that’s exposed to him. His hands continue groping at your body, and you sigh out in bliss. 

“You’re beyond perfect, my love.” He says, kissing a mark right on your chest. “Why don’t you let me show you how gorgeous you are?” 

Tatsumi looks up at you, awaiting your consent, and once you nod, he lowers himself even further. 

The next morning, you wake up to dozens of love bites across your body and you look at yourself in the mirror, smiling at the beauty marks on your face. 

You feel gorgeous.

[cocoa-goat]

hey! I was just wondering what your take is on albedo, kazuha and xiao’s ideal type/what they look for in a partner? no worries if this isn’t your kind of thing or if you’re busy :D sending love either way <3

What they look for in a partner || Genshin Impact

Quick notes: Hello thanks for the request, and it’s alright! I managed to write for all three of the boys, so I hope it’s up to your expectations! Also please keep in mind that these headcanons are all based on my personal opinion and are not meant to be taken seriously. Thanks for your understanding. ヽ(•ө•)♡

Featuring: Albedo, Kazuha, and Xiao

Warning/s: None

Albedo Kreideprinz

Albedo isn’t very strict when it comes to the standards of his significant other. He will love you just the way you are.

He will adore everything about you, including your imperfections; because to him, your flaws are what make you beautiful in his own point of view—just like his artwork which mostly consists of paintings of you.

But as for the personality, I think he will love it when you know how to respect his boundaries.

We all know that Albedo is mostly busy in Dragonspine working on his experiments and concoctions; and most of them have proven to be quite dangerous, so it’s best you step away when he warns you about a certain experiment and such.

He only does this because he doesn’t want to cause harm to you just because of an experiment that somehow went wrong, much less blew up.

If by any chance you do get hurt, his eyes will widden and he’ll immediately rush to your side to check if whether your injuries are major or not. Either way, he’s still pretty worried. And when he’s finished patching you up he’ll tell you to be more cautious while he’s working, so please be careful. (；´Д｀)

Adeptus Xiao

Considering his past, Xiao has a tendency to push people away and build a wall around his heart, blocking away any signs of attachment towards them.

It would take a lot of patience and understanding for you to break down his walls, and if by some chance you succeed in doing so, Xiao has already devoted himself to you before you even realize it.

Xiao may also have trouble attempting to open up about his feelings and emotions, but he’s trying his best—and he’s trying for you. So all he asks in return is for you to understand him and perhaps provide him even just a tiny bit of comfort. He’s more of an actions speak louder than words type of guy.

Xiao mostly runs his errands alone, without any companions; whether it be protecting Liyue or conquering demons. And since he’s been alone for such a long time, he has to admit that it does get quite lonely for him. So he’s thankful that he has you to keep him company every once in a while. Even though he doesn’t actually ask for it, just take the initiative to talk to him and he’ll eventually get comfortable around you.

He wants someone who he can trust to be with him throughout his highs and lows, but at the same time he’s also afraid that he might affect you with his karmic debt in any way.

Often times he will wonder if he really does deserve someone like you in his life to the point where he’s doubting it. He’s in constant need of validation from you so please reassure him, he really appreciates it. ☹️

Kazuha Kaedehara

Kazuha grows fond of people who are openminded, carefree, and accepts him for who he really is.

He also loves the type of person who’s compassionate about their goals and someone who’s determined to achieve them, just like him. That’s what he looks for in a partner because these qualities will automatically match his vibe; just like a perfect pair.

Kazuha doesn’t really mind your looks, instead he focuses more on your personality and your kindness of heart. Gentleness is also a trait that he looks for in his significant other, and it’s honestly what he loves the most about you.

One of Kazuha’s passions are writing poetry, and he’ll recite them to you once he thinks its worthy enough for you to hear about it. He will love it when you acknowledge his work and know how to give the right criticism in order for him to improve. :)

As we all know, Kazuha is a wanderer and there’s no permanent place for him to stay. And even if he did stay in certain areas, it would only be temporary. He’s mostly away from you, but he will always make sure that he can pay you a visit to spend time with you every once in a while. All he wants is for you to be patient and wait for his return.

If you ask him to let you travel with him, then he’ll happily oblige; unless he knows it’s dangerous and there’s a possibility for you to get hurt. This might cause him to make excuses in order to prevent you from traveling with him.

But don’t get me wrong, he does this because he cares for you, and he knows you care for him as well. He just doesn’t want you to get hurt so he’ll really appreciate it if you understand his true intentions.

My apologies if some of my points seem a little rushed, I’m still in the process of improving my writing. But thanks for reading, and have a great day! :D

[softlymellow]

flaws -- B.B

pairing: Bucky Barnes x ! insecure reader

word count: 1.8k

warnings: angst and talk about body image, insecurities and a persons flaws. 

summary: reader compares herself to Natasha as she see’s her and Bucky getting close. She think’s he doesn’t have feelings for her due to her not being perfect and because of her flaws but Bucky reassures her it’s not. 

note: i hope this imagine isn’t taken this wrong way as me trying to romanticise someones insecurities. if i did please dm me or let me know so i can help fix it!! i promise i wasn’t trying to make anyone feel bad or anything and EVERYONE IS SO BEAUTIFUL IN ALL SHAPES AND FORMS and everybody is insecure about something and that’s completely normal but you are loved and you are perfect and you don’t need a man ( or girl! ) to tell you that. hope you guys enjoyyy

You loved being the reason he smiled or laughed.

 Not that he would do it often, his face masked from the trauma he experienced. But when you were the reason he was happy, it gave you almost a sense of pride, but it was taken away from you.

There she was, Natasha Romanoff. 

Her incredible orange hair that sat on her shoulders was eye-catching, her glowing skin and her full scarlet lips complimented her appearance tremendously. 

You couldn't blame her. She was everything you couldn't be and everything you should be. Yet, the lump that rested in the back of your throat was difficult to ignore as you watched Bucky and Natasha interact with each other. A genuine laugh arose from the male, yet you could only wish you were the reason he laughed.

It wasn't as if you weren't friends with him. Hell, it seemed like a lot more to you. Maybe only to you.

You pulled your knees to your chest and hugged them tightly, watching the pair chatter among each other near the dining table as you reside in the comfort of the couch across from them.

Steve sat beside you, busy fixating himself on his new cellphone and playing around with the features.

You drew small circles on your knee to comfort yourself, ignoring the voice that was calling out to you.

"Y/n!" Your head snapped to your right, looking at a semi-concerned Steve. "Almost lost you there," He chuckled while you rubbed your eyes, gaining your full attention.

"How do you change the ringtone?" He innocently asked, poking his phone.

"Just go to settings and search it up." You told him, relocating your gaze to the pair. Steve hummed as he did what you instructed him. You sat quietly before you began to chew on your fingernails, thinking of every possible explanation on why Bucky would choose Natasha over you.

It almost felt as if you were being toyed with, one minute you'd be two peas in a pod, often being teased as one of the only people Bucky began to get close to other than Steve. On the other, he'd be flaunting off to every girl he would see.

"You know you should stop staring before you make it obvious," Steve whispered next to you,  jumping at the sudden break in thought and looking over to a smirking man.

"Steve," You hissed, glaring at him, "before making what obvious?" You innocently asked, attempting to cover up the embarrassment you felt.

Steve shot you a knowing look and you felt your cheeks flare-up, "Shut up."

"I didn't say anything," Steve responded with a smug expression. You rolled your eyes jokingly before turning your attention to Bucky.

"You should give it a shot, yknow," Steve whispered.

You shook your head 'no', snapping your gaze to Steve, "Trust me," He said in a hushed tone. Looking back to Natasha, you couldn't help the sickening feeling as you watched the pair flirt with each other.

"What would he see in me that he wouldn't in Nat," You mumbled under your breath, not intending for Steve to hear.

"You wouldn't know," Steve cleared his throat, poking at his phone with a pleased look on his face. You tilted your head as you narrowed your eyes at him. Getting up from the couch, you had decided to leave to wallow in your sadness.

You made your way past the pair and you heard the silence that fell among them, their gaze darting holes in your back as you walked away from the room.

Ignoring the distant mumbling behind you, you made your way towards your bedroom. Locking the door behind you, you hadn't bothered to turn the lights on. You dropped on your bed as you felt a swarm of emotions hit you. Once mostly consisting of jealousy.

You took out your phone and headed straight to Instagram. You scrolled through for what could only be interpreted as hours before you paused on a single post that lied on your feed.

It was a picture of Natasha that was posted only a few hours ago. It was taken during Tony's infamous parties last night, one that you had skipped out on due to feeling ill. She sat on a red velvet couch, and she wore a skin-tight black dress that sparkled in the light. She held a drink to her mouth as her red straightened hair fell over her eye. You had noticed that Bucky liked the picture, and you felt the tears brim your eyes. Your grip holding the phone as if your life depended on it suddenly faltered as it fell beside your head, briefly missing your face.

Getting up towards the large mirror that was framed on the closet door, you noticed every imperfection on your figure. Your hands travelled to your shirt as you pulled it off your body, leaving you only in your bra and your negative thoughts.

Your eyes wandered to every flaw, the extra fat and skin on your stomach. The way your body wasn't the perfect hourglass figure. Your fingers traced over your stretch marks that lied on your hips, feeling the slight dent in your skin. Tears began to fall down your face. Your flabby arms and that your breasts wasn't the ideal type.

Sitting on the ground in front of your mirror, you hugged your legs tightly against your chest as you sobbed.

You couldn't fit the standards that were made. The more you looked and the more you scrolled, just end up bringing newfound insecurities. That was a problem you had faced many times during your life and you began to doubt yourself. You would rather be anybody else, feeling unfit in your own body, one that was especially for you. All you saw was what you should be. A happier person, a prettier girl, and a stronger Avenger.

You threw your shirt back on, making your way towards your bed. Lying your head down, you allowed yourself to think about nothing. Empty thoughts. Thoughts that had no meaning and brought you no use.

A knock on the door brought you back to your reality. Getting up, you brushed away the tears that stained your cheeks as you sniffed. Suddenly feeling exposed, you pulled your sleeves down to hide your arms before opening the door.

Your eyes widened as you saw a concerned Bucky waiting outside. His eyebrows furrowed upon seeing your puffy eyes and your red cheeks.

"Can I come in?" He politely asked, his eyes watching every move you made. You nodded, not trusting your voice.

You stood aside, allowing Bucky to slip into your room as you shut the door behind him.

You leaned against the door, your arms crossed against your chest as you waited for him to say something.

He sighed, not knowing where to start, his hands ruffling his hair. "Are you avoiding me?" He obliviously asked. You could almost laugh at how stupid of a question it was.

Your lips could only quiver as you attempted to respond to him. "What?"

"Doll, I don't know if I did something wrong, but you seemed pretty upset back there." He tilted his head and pressed his lips together.

You shook your head as you bit the insides of your mouth, "No, no, it was nothing." You muttered as you sat on your bed, staring at your palms.

"Doll, I know you well enough to know when something is wrong." He shot you a small smile.

"Do you like her?" You instantly regretted saying that, your insecurities creeping in again.

Bucky was taken back by the sudden question, his eyebrows raised in confusion. "Who?"

"Natasha."

"What, no. Where'd you hear that from?" He enquired.

You looked up at Bucky, tears glossing over your vision. "I've seen the way you look at her, Buck."

"No, Y/n. I've never liked her."

"You don't have to lie for me. I mean, what's there not to like. She has the perfect body, face and hair and-" You were interrupted by his sudden grasp on your hands.  

"And you don't have those things?"

"I-I don't." You whispered.

"That's a lie, and you know it." His firm voice alarmed you as if you somehow offended him.

You got up and kept strong eye contact with him. "What are you trying to say, Bucky? Have you seen me?" You scoffed and started to point and poke around your flaws.

"There's nothing wrong with your body, doll." He said in a calmer tone, realising you were insecure about your body image.

"Bucky, you can just stop faking it. Go back to Natasha." You muttered, sniffing as you looked down at your feet.

"I don't love Natasha, Y/n! I love you, doll. I always have." He confessed, slightly panting as he raised his voice.

You stood still, finding it difficult to believe in his words.

"I love you and every part of you." He took your hands in his and planted a small kiss onto your knuckles.

"Then what about-"

"Forget about her, doll. I tried to forget about you through her. Steve told me." He looked up to your eyes, watching your reaction.

You felt the heat creep onto your face as you realised he knows your feelings towards himself.

"Do you really?" You asked, hope in your eyes.

He nodded, still holding your hand and planting small kisses. His kisses travelled up towards your arms as you felt a swarm of butterflies swarm your insides.

"I love your arms," he left a trail of kisses as he went further up.

"Your shoulders," he mumbled against your skin, a tingling sensation was left after every kiss as you felt yourself biting your lip in admiration.

He made his way towards your neck, loving the way you tensed under his touch. "Your neck," he kissed behind your ear as you bit back a moan.

You tilted your head, allowing him to move further, his lips moving alongside your jaw. He finally reached your lips and caught your gaze on his. His lips were mere inches apart from yours, you felt his breath fan over yours.

"Your lips," he whispered, his mouth slowly reaching yours as they gently kissed. Your lips dancing over his, enjoying the moment. His lips were soft against yours and he kissed you as if you were fragile, something to not be tampered with.

He slowly let go of you, his forehead against yours. "I love everything about you, doll. Don't doubt that and don't compare yourself to other women. You're equally if not more beautiful than them." He whispered, pecking you on the cheek.

"You'll realise your worth, Y/n." He kissed you on the forehead.

You felt better after Bucky had come found you that night. Your insecurities didn't go away, instead, you found them as someone else's treasure. And that made you feel better.

-----

a/n: man that last part has me embarrassed. 

[lumin3sc3]

Can i request an Albedo x reader, but their insecure?? So Albedo just comforting them? Sorry i just needed some comfort, not feeling the best rn ahah, if you do take this req, ty! Any gender is fine btw!

Note: Ty for the req anon, and I hope you're doing well rn! And I hope this fic brings a smile to your face :) and to everyone else reading rn! I hope I did well writing this fic ^^!

Warnings: Mentions of reader crying, and hints of suicidal thoughts, lmk if you need me to add more warnings.

As pretty as a Picture

It was dusk and the orange hues were fading into a night sky with blankets of stars that stretched into infinity.

It had been pretty late once Albedo had got home, so he assumed you were asleep; thus, not wanting to disturb your slumber, he decided to enter his abode quietly, making sure to minimize the amount of noise he made.

He put his coat on the hanger beside the door and let out a cold puff of air. The weather was extremely chilly, and Albedo wanted to get home as soon as possible, but his work kept him extremely busy. He hoped to come home to your warm embrace, but sadly, it had gotten too late.

He walked towards the door, and before he could open the door to his shared room with you, he heard distant sobs. He paused before opening the knob. He couldn't be mistaken; you were crying. Your muffled sniffling could be heard. Albedo's eyes widen slightly. He twists the doorknob with a soft click. Thankfully, you hadn't heard that. He continued walking towards you. The faint thudding of his boots on the wooden floor resonated through the room. You quickly shoot your head up, recognizing Albedo's figure, you try to get up, wiping your face hurriedly.

Albedo quickens his pace, and then bends to your eye level, holding your wrist, effectively stopping your actions. His turquoise eyes gaze into yours. He sighs before pulling you into him, 

"I'm not going to ask you what's wrong, but please let me know what's bothering you so you don't have to shoulder it alone."

And that made you completely break down. You felt your heart shattering as you clenched onto the fabric of his shirt tightly as you cried your heart out. He stroked your back rhythmically in a soothing manner, in efforts to calm down your frantic state. He tries to coax some words out of you, trying not to panic you further.

"Albedo I'm sorry…"

"For?"

"For being so stupid, I feel like I ruin everything and everyone I'm around, and I-I feel so unattractive and just so-"

But before you can continue, he pulls your face towards his, pressing a kiss on your lips, the lingering warmth of his lips still on yours.

He holds your hand in his as he continues, "(Y/n), don't say that about yourself, everything about you, whether it be your flaws or imperfections, I find everything about you perfect, you are everything I could've asked for and more. If only you could've seen yourself the way I saw you, you'd speak much more differently. "

He wished he could explain how much you meant to him. You were the perfect partner, regardless of your flaws, whatever they may be, he found everything about you mesmerizing and endearing. You were as pretty as a picture. Your warm embrace is what he hopes to come home to, and your beautiful smile and laugh are what he hopes to wake up to every day. Your eyes were deep and filled with loving gazes; your lips reminded him of an incarnadine rose; your fleeting touches were addictive; and your voice was more than endearing to him. To him, your features, flaws, imperfections, anything about you, was exquisite and ethereal. If only he could express it to you.

Soon, your sobbing had stopped, albeit some hushed sniffles. You had buried your face in his chest, but you were slightly embarrassed, considering you had done it so impulsively. You didn't think he minded it though.

The room was pitch dark, the sole source of light being the one from the pale crescent the night sky held. The gentle moonlit glow blanketed you and Albedo. The luminescent glow made his features look much more enchanting than they already were.

"You know, I feel kind of stupid for crying about something like this…" You laughed to yourself. You could feel more tears rolling down your cheeks, which were already stained from former tears. His cold fingertips came into contact with your burning cheek. The featherlight touch gave you a sense of comfort, though you could not put it into words.

"I don't think it's stupid at all. I completely understand; it's in human nature to feel such things, so please, if you ever feel such things again, which God forbid doesn't happen again, please do talk to me. You shouldn't carry it like this. I don't know what I'd do without you (y/n), so please.. " His voice was slightly cracked. If he were being honest, his greatest fear was losing you, and Klee, of course. You two would probably be the only things he'd die for. It just showed how much he loved you. The more he thought about it, the more anxiety welled up in the depths of his heart.

"Don't worry, Albedo, I won't do something like that. Besides, where would I go leaving someone as amazing as you behind? I don't think I can afford to lose that. " You giggle as you give his hand a gentle squeeze, entwining his fingers with yours. You could feel a slight warmth emanating from his palms.

He sighs contentedly, "You do realize how grateful I am to have you as a partner, right?"

You lean closer to him, giving him a loving kiss on the cheek, "Yes bedo, I love you too."

✧∘* ೃ ⋆｡˚

A/N: Hey..! So I wanted to say something, as someone who's dealing with a mountain ton of insecurities and not so positive mindset (but working on it tho !!), I'd like to say that, imo, only when we love ourselves completely, will we feel happy, self-love comes first ! So remember to take care of yourselves, talk to someone, whether it be your parents, guardians, friends, or anyone really! A friend can help ease the burden, trust me !

Please remember to take care of yourselves well, stay hydrated and eat healthy, just know I love you sm <3!

[writingtoforgetreality]

Sleep Paralysis (Helmut Zemo x Reader)

[Marvel-Masterlist]

Summary: You hated sharing a room with another person. Especially when it came to sleeping. Which usually resulted into you staying awake for the night if you were teamed up with someone. Sometimes you could not escape exhaustion, though.

Words: 2,381

Warnings: language, angst, fluff, insomnia, experiencing sleep paralysis, anxiety, TFATWS spoilers (I don’t think there are any but just to be sure I guess), Zemo awakens the poet in me idk, REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

The people you found yourself teamed up with gave you safety. Sam, Bucky & even Zemo. With the three of them on your side, you had nothing to fear. Missions with these guys were easy. If the two grown ass men children were not occupied with killing the other grown ass man child. Names were not needed here, that was explanation enough. You were surprised yourself when you started enjoying Zemo’s company. He was a criminal. He was supposed to be the bad guy. So why could you not view him as such? Was it the way he moved his body? Was it his hair which fell in place just perfectly imperfect? Was it his coat that accentuated the weight of the world he carried on his shoulders alone? Was it his smile that was just the tiniest bit bigger whenever he glanced at you? Was it that stupid head tilt thing that was everything but stupid to you? What the hell was it? And why the hell was resisting your urges so damn hard?

Maybe it was your mind playing tricks on you but you could have sworn that his eyes fell on you, no matter how big the crowd. You could have sworn that his body searched out your presence wherever you went. There was this unspoken thing between you guys. As much as you wanted to address the tension building up, you were apprehensive what your best friends would say about it. You were doubtful how he would receive the news. Your ever growing friendship was at risk. The mere thought of having to live your life without him was inconceivable. How did it work before he came along? It was like your brain erased those memories altogether. Truthfully, he changed your life around without having an idea of the effect he had on you. Or he did know but enjoyed messing with your feelings. Though he did not strike you as that type of man.

Countless nights were spent with you having deep, meaningful conversations. Thanks to those times, you perceived his side of the story. His motives & what drove him to the actions that brought him behind bars in the end. By no means were you trying to justify his crimes. There would have been multiple different ways. Back then, the only purpose for him was revenge. Apologies that came too late were given. Zemo truly was sorry. And while words & emotions could be faked easily, it was impossible to hide the deeper meaning that his eyes held. The softness, the wariness, he could not simulate this. Those beautiful brown orbs were withholding years worth of tears. It was not your position to force him to display his weakness in front of you. Sometimes, simply knowing that another person was available if needed, that was enough.

The same feeling of secureness was provided by him. Your past was not necessarily pleasant either. Innumerable regrets labeled your existence. You were not a good example of a hero. Every day, you contemplated the what-if’s. Overthinking was part of your diurnal routine. All the pondering was needless. The switch only shifted after the beginnings of Zemo’s nocturnal reassurances. Without him, you would still be stuck in that gloomy pit your body had constructed on its own. You two were reliant on each other. Not physically but mentally. Unpretentiously, small touches followed. Brushing his thumbs over your smooth skin on the back of your hand. Squeezing your shoulders gingerly. Goosebumps erupted each time his body warmth was transferred to yours. Whether he wore his leather gloves or not, your body responded with endless fireworks that launched from deep inside.

The hotel you entered radiated wealth. Zemo negotiated the reservations. Which was obvious by the mere impression of the lofty ceilings that were embellished with immense sparkling chandeliers. Your eyes overstrained from the extravagance, switching from one highlight to the next. As a regular citizen, your income denied you such a lifestyle. Avengers did not earn a fortune, this trait came with the job description. Meaning that you would savor every little ticking of your stay. The marvelous high of contentment ceased when the receptionist informed you of an immutable adjustment concerning your room situation. The only two vacant premises were a king size in one & two singles in the other. Apparently, the decision was resolved without you having a say in it. Your questions were answered with a definite proclamation. You were the only soul unable to kill the Baron. Your attempts to conceal your embarrassment were unsuccessful. The smirk adorning Zemo’s features was unhelpful in your current position. Sam & Bucky abandoned you in the entrance, heading off to their room to rest after a tiring mission.

Zemo demanded your luggage to be brought up to your chambers. One of his hands rested on your lower back. This motion warmed your body. It was so simple yet filled with extensive care. It should have been wrong but you have never felt more protected in your entire life. One thing worried you. Sharing a room with the man who brought out your true happiness. It was no secret that you suffered from insomnia. Usually, it vanished after indefinite missions. The interminable flight in Zemo’s private jet added up to your exhaustion. Under no circumstances would you sleep in a room with the Baron. The trust existed, that was not the issue. What happened during your slumber could not be controlled. The tossing, turning, screaming. Nightmares invaded your dreams every time you closed your eyes. Therefore, you obviated sleep as long as possible. Multiple cups of coffee, the heavy does of caffeine every day, aided your wish to stay up. If you narrated a good enough excuse, he would not inquire. At least, that was what you hoped.

Stepping through the tall door into the spacious room, you stopped dead in your tracks. You needed a second to take everything in. Never before had you occupied such a luxurious chamber. It resembled a suite. Different shades of warm colors complemented each other. The vast windows enabled your view of the city beneath. Colorful lights brought the dead of the dim night to life. Facing the stars aligning the somber night sky, Zemo arranged himself next to you. Minutes of silence enveloped you, filling the room to the brink. The man next to you fractured the quietness with whispers. He pointed out various constellations. Observantly, you absorbed his words. He was cultured but never bragged about it. His sentiment of deliberate timing was unique. One of his characteristics was fathoming when to quit talking. Or when it was suitable to speak. Zemo constantly knew how to ease the tension with his thoughtful comments.

“You take the bed. I am content with resting on the couch.” he proposed. As much as you appreciated his deliberation, you pronounced the contrary.

“No, Helmut. I won’t sleep anyway, you can have the bed.” your gentle smile underlined the tiredness emanating from your eyes. He tilted his head to one side, observing your body language.

“You have not rested after our mission yet. Not even during the flight where Sam, James & I slept.” he annotated, worry audible in his voice. Your shoulders lifted in a short shrug. Alleging that you were fine. Spending hours with you concluded to him comprehending your lies. Your features were different whenever you attempted feigning him. Approaching your figure in the barely illuminated room, he halted a few steps away from you. Movements of his hands caught your attention. The gloves were peeled off. Lifting one of his arms, you shivered when his skin touched your cheek affectionately. His fingers caressed your face so lovingly, your eyes closed instinctively. “You are exhausted, darling.” his words were soft, soothing your ears by the fragility of them. The space between you two was narrow. You breathed the same air. His body heat passed onto you. Your heart sped up, almost as if it could break out any second. Nobody had ever made you feel that way. Nodding obediently, Zemo dragged you closer to the soft mattress covered with silk sheets. It was a desired invitation. It did not last long before you gave in. The smooth material welcomed you. Realizing Zemo’s retreating steps, your hand reached for his wrist, freezing his tries. He glanced over his shoulder bewildered.

“Stay.” it was music to his ears, hearing your quiet proposition. Holding himself back, he shook his head briefly. A signal that he did not want to disturb you. “Please.” his face softened at your plea. How could he resist your sweet voice? How could he resist you when it was obvious that you wished for him to stay with you?

“Okay.” pulling back the blankets, he lied right behind you. Your back was facing him. The shock was only brief when your hand searched for his arm. Draping it over your waist, you sighed contently when he embraced you tighter. It was not just what you needed. This, it was required by him as well.

Peaceful hours of cuddling went by without disruption. The calm was interrupted by your eyes snapping open in fear. Your back was against the mattress. Staring at the tall ceiling, your breath quickened when you could not move. Could not talk. Could not scream. There was not a single thing that could be done but you awaited the bad that would arrive soon. It was not the first time you experienced such a situation. The pressure in your chest grew steadily, obstructing your breathing. Your muscles ached, your head pounded. Someone would murder you. If you did not rise soon, death would come knocking on your door. Your attempts to push away the sheets & your labored breath stirred the man next to you awake. His confusion ended when he noticed your struggles. Propping his head onto one of his arms, he scooted closer to your body. Zemo knew what you were going through at the moment. While he had never suffered from such a period himself, he had read about it. Your eyes widened when his locked onto yours. The fear was visible even without a light illuminating the room. His free hand moved to your cheek. In the process, he whispered sweet nothings to you in hopes that they would reach you. Irregular breaths were still very much present. Though you had him with you, your anxiety was acting up still. Your mind was determined that you would die in a few minutes.

“Hey, hey, hey. Darling, look at me.” your eyes slowly shifted from the ceiling to his dark, almost black ones. They were a beautiful shade of brown but it was too sinister to detect the different hues. “There you go.” his voice was steady, controlled. “What you are experiencing is called sleep paralysis. It means that you are awake but your body is asleep still. It will be over soon, I promise. This might feel life threatening to you but I’m here, okay? I am here with you & I will not let anything happen to you.” his eyebrows raised expectantly. The most you could give him was a useless attempt of a nod. His fingers stroked over your skin, bringing you comfort. You were not on your own. Zemo held you close to his body. Still unable to move, the one thing you could feel was his body heat. Minutes without change went by. Affirmations were whispered into the quiet of the ample room. Your leg shuffled the blankets. A small smile crept onto your face. Finally, you had control again. Your muscles were no longer frozen in place. Overwhelmed by the sudden liberty, you embraced Zemo into a tight hug. Reciprocating immediately, he held your head in place in the crook of his neck. His other arm raked around your waist, keeping you as close as possible. He assured you that you were alright. That nobody & nothing could hurt you. Not when he was around. The silent tears rolling down your cheeks were inevitable. They stained his shirt but he could not care less. All that mattered was you overcoming the feeling of uncontrollability. Maybe it was his explanation. Or his proximity. Or his sweet words calming you down. In the end, the cause was insignificant. Zemo helped you through this & there were no words to express your gratitude to him.

Pulling away slightly, he rested his forehead against yours. You mimicked his deep breaths, disposing of the last bits of worry. When you were in his presence, it was gratuitous to be fearful. Demons had no chance. Not when it came to Zemo. The next reaction came naturally. This time, you did not fight the urge to press your lips onto his. You took his breath away by the unexpected action. There were no complaints from his side. Both hands rested on your face, bringing you closer if it was even feasible. In your imagination, you recalled kissing Zemo to be heated. This right now was the exact opposite. No words could depict what emotions were rushing through your entire body. Descriptions were useless if you could demonstrate it with a simple kiss. After it ended, silence sheathed you two once again. It was everything but unpleasant. He kept holding onto you. Zemo would never judge you because of nightmares or similar occurrences. Your head rested on his chest, above his heart. The beat calming your nerves even further. Explaining that you had always suffered from the monsters of the night, he did not interrupt. You needed to confide & he was more than happy to be available. Another soft kiss was pressed on top of your head. A content sigh left your lips. Zemo assured you that he would stay, no matter what. He was in this for good. Whatever this was. Time would clarify the relationship between you two. All you knew was that it felt right. Having him close to you. Having him as your protector. Having him to brighten up your days. Simply having him. That was adequate. That was your unspoken wish. You expected a lot but you did not expect the fulfillment of a previous unknown dream. You were home.

Published (04/21/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @eristudytime, @hiraethmaximoff, @incansas, @fionanovasleftnut, @mundaytuesday, @ashamed23, @pedropascallovebot, @kpoptrash2000, @lulu-yuming, @bibliophilewednesday, @arctic--ash, @mischiefmanaged71, @yallgotkik, @noavengers, @lieutenantn, @birdieofloxley, @aisling1985, @tatooineisdry, @obsidian-queen, @h0ly-fire, @dxnxdjarxn (thanks for your support <3)

[myrulia]

"You Taste Sweeter" - Kokushibou x Self Conscious!Reader

.｡.:*✧Synopsis: You are rather self conscious of yourself and it becomes bothersome to your Upper Moon of a lover. How will you react to you being beneath him and having sweets drizzled all over you, all the while being treated like fragile candy?

.｡.:*✧Warnings: Food play, body worship, praising, dirty talk

.｡.:*✧Word count: 4225

`` Does this look decent? `` You asked whilst slowly turning around to meet the gaze of your one and only, Kokushibou. The Upper Moon One was simply sitting on your shared bed and eyeing your standing form that changed into the fifth outfit of the hour. Truth be told, he was annoyed with your constant switches and why you cared so deeply about others opinion. At the end of the day, if you are comfortable then why worry?

`` [Y/N], choose a kimono already. This is the 5th one and my statement still stands, choose the first one and get it over with, `` said Kokushibou with a harsh tone. You knew he leisurely became aggravated at your hesitancy to decide on an outfit. The process could have been done an hour ago - and yet here you are, standing in front of your mirror with furrowed eyebrows and glaring at your lover. `` Darling, it is not as easy as you make it seem- ``

`` Then what is stopping you? ``

His sudden interruption made you go as quiet as a field mouse. Your back stiffened and it was obvious your entire body became tense. As always, Kokushibou had read you like a book and there was nothing you could do to outsmart him. Sighing out, you allowed your shoulders to drop to relax your stiffened muscles, still standing before the Upper Moon in slight shame that you allowed yourself to hide the truth from him for so long. You did not wish to take so long with choosing a measly outfit - in fact it never took you this long before - but this night was different. It started a little after sundown when you first looked at yourself in nothing but basic lingerie to analyze yourself, and the more you looked, the more you found more imperfections about yourself. You thought to yourself that Kokushibou deserved better than less than perfect, and thinking of the many beautiful humans and demons you have seen in your lifetime, you have come to realize just how truly indifferent you are.

As you were lost in thought, your much taller lover stood up from your shared bed, now taking slow strides to you until he was directly in front of you, placing his much larger hands on your shoulders and heaving out a small breath before speaking - supposedly attempting to de-escalate his aggravation. `` [Y/N], what are you not telling me? ``

In that annoyingly husky voice, Kokushibou leant down to your left ear, speaking in such a deep tone that you had to readjust the clothes that suddenly became tight on your skin. The demon then stood straight with his hands still on your smaller form, all the while you had to recollect yourself in order to speak your truth to your lover. Inhaling and exhaling slowly, you look into the pair of eyes in the middle, finally speaking. `` I have felt uncomfortable in my own skin as of late. I feel like I am not good enough because there are many more beautiful women to choose from so I do not know why you would choose me. ``

This time he let you speak, processing what you said and scoffing in both disbelief and offense. His glare became more prominent on his features so suddenly you felt smaller than what he usually makes you feel. Removing your gaze from his golden irises, you look down at the tatami mat flooring to ignore the internal shame you felt for feeling such ways. It is not like you could control those emotions, you felt as though you could not be compared to any other women your eyes have fallen upon. They were beyond gorgeous and that was a fact you accepted the more you thought about your imperfections.

`` Look at me. ``

His demanding tone lead to your head to snap in the direction of his own, which caused your chin to naturally tilt up. Your lip was quivering - yet barely noticeable because you wanted to look strong for your even stronger lover. Of course, his supernatural vision allowed him to notice every single detail about you, and so he obviously saw the pained expression on your face that you were struggling to hide. Sighing and shaking his head, Kokushibou runs a thumb over your bottom, glossy lip before leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss onto your plump lips. You immediately let out a small whimper as your walls basically became crumbling down, allowing yourself to melt into his embrace.

Your lips practically lunged at his, tasting him for all he is worth while his did the same, indulging himself in your flavor until that is all he could detect on his taste receptors. A kiss that went from something so delicate and innocent now turned salacious and lust-filled. Your back was met with the hard surface of the wall from Kokushibou forcefully pushing you, and so you let out a small gasp that parted your lips yet they were quickly silenced with his landing on yours once more. You were trapped in his embrace in that moment with your small whimpers being hushed by his lips ravaging yours hungrily, obviously wanting something more out of the already heated kiss. Although oxygen was also needed so he withdrew himself from you, all the while you were left a mess and leaning against the wall for support. A hand of yours made its way onto the demon's hair, raking your fingers through the mess until you successfully pulled his ponytail out from its hold. 

While you both chased after your much needed breath, calloused hands moved from your shoulders to your waist, yet positioned themselves at your thighs and hoisted you up on the wall. Instinctively, you wrap your legs around his waist to keep yourself from falling onto the floor, but just as quickly as you also wrapped your arms around his neck, Kokushibou kept his hands firm on your thighs. He sauntered back to your shared bed and placed you gently on the mattress, standing in between your thighs that refused to let him go. The Upper Moon took note of your actions and let out a small chuckle, just before wiping away any stray hairs that had fallen on your face. `` Please wait for me, I need to grab something from the other room. ``

You pouted at his sudden announcement of leaving due to the fact that he already managed to get you this bothered in your own clothes, feeling as though you are suffocating in them. `` Fine, but do hurry, I need you. ``

He simply nodded before placing your legs back down and stepping out of the room quickly to grab who knows what. While your lover is unfortunately gone, your hands spring to strip your body of the overly smothering kimono on your body. You discarded the unnecessary clothing onto the floor, taking no note of the small noise you heard outside of the sliding door connecting to the hallway of your home. 

Whilst you were stuck in the bedroom being impatient as ever, Kokushibou who looked around for a certain something was having a hard time locating the item he acquired merely a few days ago. He let out a low grunt of dissatisfaction multiple times until he successfully located the one thing he desired.

Chocolate.

Not just any chocolate, chocolate syrup that he had many plans with. Having said substance in hand, he strolls back to your shared bedroom only to be met with the sight of your body in nothing but a simple underwear set, but the one thing that caught all six of his eyes was your fingers plunging in and out of your cunt whorishly. Your eyes were closed so you were not aware of his entrance, your cheeks being flushed from the feeling of your fingers - yet it was not enough to pleasure yourself. You twisted and writhed, your legs being clenched shut trying to feel more from yourself, yet you could not satisfy your own needs no matter how rigorously you moved your two digits.

Kokushibou, who continued to move undetected, placed the chocolate onto the bedside table, moving to stand in front of you once completed with the simple task. He could not lie, he was enjoying the sight of you not being able to get yourself off without the help of himself, yet despite enjoying the small little show you were not aware of giving him, his hand finds your wrist, grabbing you gently to stop your movements. You peel your eyes open to meet his gaze, your faces being inches from each other. `` I- I am so sorry- ``

`` There is nothing to apologize for, but my star, let me make you feel how beautiful you are instead. ``

Your cheeks flushed even more once Kokushibou began crawling onto the bed, pulling down your panties by the hem, slowly gliding them down your legs until they were completely off and throwing them to the side as well. His other hand trailing up your thigh and spreading your legs to reveal the delicious sight of your dripping pussy pulsating in such desire for him. You crawled backwards until your back hit the wall once more, meaning you were trapped and at his disposal as always. The male kept his eyes fixated on you and your flustered state that was so easy to cause. You turned your head away feeling flushed and heated in your lower reigns, but you refused to admit to such things. `` [Y/N] I want you to look at me as I pleasure you. ``

His voice returned to the same husky tone he used earlier to seduce you into doing such naughty things, so you found yourself staring into his golden irises again and longing for his touch, his scent to overwhelm your nose, his cock bending your mind to pleasure. You desired him and it was no point in hiding such a fact. There were no words that needed to be uttered in order for Kokushibou to understand just exactly what you needed - but that does not mean he is not going to be a tease about it. 

Laying you down gently, he now has both hands interlocked with yours, hovering above your almost entirely exposed body while the only thing exposed of his was his chest and abdomen. It was a habit of his to wander around your shared living space in nothing but a measly hakama that teased the living hell out of you, and even now, it seemed like the fabric was mocking you again, blocking your view of his muscular body above yours. `` My love, I never want you to feel like you are anything less than utterly beautiful. You will forever be the brightest star in my life and nothing can change that. Please do not feel those things about yourself ever again, otherwise the punishment will be far worse than this. ``

`` What do you mean punishme- oh, `` you managed to let out a small gasp at the end of your questioning sentence in view of the fact that your lover grabbed something you never would have even guessed he owned, drizzling the light brown substance all over your lower abdomen. The cold feeling being left on your exposed skin caused you to squirm - just a bit - so you could adjust yourself to the temperature, and seeing you struggle was amusing to the demon before you. A large hand glides up your arms, stopping just in front of your still covered chest by that accursed bra of yours, so in one swift movement, it is ripped from your body and in shreds on the floor. You let out a miniscule whimper at your nipples now being exposed to the cold air around you.

Kokushibou's hands then trailed to your cold, erected nipples, fondling with the two sensitive buds while watching your face scrunch at the tease of pleasure he was giving you. Bucking your hips up, you whine much more audibly this time, making your needs and wants known to the Upper Moon because the teasing was driving you mad. A deep chuckle escaped his lips. Now leaning his head forward, his tongue probes out from his mouth and landing on your skin, coaxing the wet muscle with the chocolate he drizzled all over your stomach without shame. He continued to eye your expression, only to see that your eyes were closed and your head was now tilted back. He figured your nipples got the teasing they deserved so he pressed the pad of his thumb on the buds before gripping your breasts entirely, kneading the two globes while his tongue explored your body.

You writhed beneath him each time his fangs would brush against your skin, multiple shivers emitting from your spine that caused you to shiver. The feeling of his tongue on your body trailing up in between the valley of your breast was mind numbing and your toes curled at this. Kokushibou knew what he was doing as he got closer and closer to his face, his tongue being lathered in chocolate and saliva, the two substances that made a dangerous combination on your skin. You refused to open your eyes because now your cheeks were crimson all over again. You never would have expected such acts from a demon like the Upper Moon, and yet here you are underneath him being treated like royalty almost. 

`` I will not ask this again [Y/N], open your eyes and look at me. ``

You followed his orders - slowly. It was on purpose just to see how far he is willing to go to get his point across. Yes you were going to be a brat about it, but gradually become worse over time.

Once your eyes were fixated on him, his hand that was on your left breast gripped your cheeks, which caused your lips to be puckered open and you looked in shock as the demon spat in your mouth before exerting his lips onto yours. His tongue forcibly entered your mouth, allowing you to taste the sweet chocolate on his taste buds that was being transferred to yours, saliva getting in the mix until you could not tell who's was who's. Your hands that were originally gripped the bedsheets now wrapped themselves around his neck, pulling him closer until your chest was pressed against his. Soon you pulled away for oxygen, and it took one glance in each other's eyes to know what the latter wanted. `` Kokushibou I am sorry for wasting o-our time. Please do not tease for long. I need you to fulfill my needs. ``

`` Do not worry, your needs will be fulfilled when I say so, my star, `` Kokushibou said in a lower tone, letting go of your face and breast to finally rid of the difficult hakama covering his own erection. He quickly discarded the fabric and threw it onto the floor beside the bed, looking down at you with a fire ablaze in his eyes, peering at your body having chocolate smeared all over, but he is not done with the sweet treat just yet. `` It does not seem like you are doing much about my needs darling. ``

`` Do not worry, they will soon enough, just be patient, `` he reassured while caressing your face ever so gently with his fingers. The gesture was gentle and loving in a sense, yet you felt his girthy length invaded your already flexing pussy. Your eyes fluttered back as you do nothing but surrender yourself to complete bliss. `` Kokushibou! Warn m-me..! ``

`` You do not deserve a warning, this is a punishment..- after all, `` he snarled in response. His calloused hands found yours, taking the chance to interlock your fingers and stare down at your beautiful irises. `` You deserve to feel what it is like to be loved, and so I will not stop until you know just how beautiful you are. ``

You simply nodded, not really knowing what else to do in that moment since you felt so full because of his cock alone. You tried to adjust yourself, yet your walls continued to contract and clench on his length, and that was all it took for the male to start his slow, yet hard thrusts. He pulled out slowly, barely to the tip, before slamming himself back inside you. You inhaled sharply before letting out a loud, breathy moan, rolling your hips so you can ease the fiery pain and pleasure that overflooded your senses throughout your entire body.  Kokushibou let out a deep groan before it quickly changed into an also breathy moan, tilting his head back whilst his hands started to grip yours. He was losing control and it was obvious with how every vein pulsed on his body and became more prominent.

Moan after moan escaped your lips each time he continuously rammed his length deep inside you, reaching every goddamn spot inside of your silky insides covered in your delectable juices that made it much more easier for Kokushibou to slide in and out of your hole effortlessly. The hard rutting of his hips against yours became bruising due to the fact that his thrusts were roughly inflicting pleasure to your pussy and your skin would meet with his every time. It was too much and he barely did anything.

Your hands wormed out of his to get a better grip of something, anything, just to calm the electrifying waves of pleasure taking over your nervous system as a whole, so you moved your hands to his back and clawed at his skin for dear life. The action earned you a low growl from Kokushibou who had to grip onto the bedsheets for dear life just to hold himself up. Your nails digging into his back was painful - but enjoyable to know that he is pleasuring you this well - yet very far from done.

`` Enjoying yourself? `` He mocked whilst finally looking down at whatever ruined state you were already in. Your eyes had managed to roll back fully, your tongue being partially lolled out of your gaping mouth. Sweat droplets managed to form on your face due to the sheer amount of force his thrusts had. You nodded your head quickly in response, not being able to let out anything else except for moans of his name and moans in general, which was such a radiant sight to see for Kokushibou who knew just what to do to have you seeing stars. He himself was becoming pleasure blinded, for his slow yet rough paced was slowly becoming more rapid as more perspiration formed on his chest, forehead, arms, and lower abdomen. It was a sexy sight to say the least as groan after breathy groan came from his lips, but that quickly latched onto the side of your throat, biting the flesh - yet not enough to actually tear skin. `` Do..- Do you think I am done with you? This was just the start [Y/N]. ``

You could not conjure up a proper response, just a loud moan as you felt a hardened tip kiss against the entrance of your cervix. The feeling sent more shocks of pleasure throughout your nervous system, your breath hitching and your face scrunching up once more. `` I believe you will.. try your best!- Ngh- But what will you do.. if you do n-not succeed? ``

`` That will not happen.. rest assured. You will not know anything else but just how much of a beautiful person you are, o-okay? `` You could have sworn you heard Kokushibou out of all demons stutter on his own words. Your walls began clamping down on his cock that continued to fill your insides with each rough movement, so you felt yourself becoming closer to your climax than you had hoped.

Your chests were practically glued together from the combined sweat of your bodies as his pace never faltered, only continuing to further quicken and add on to your mind going foggy. `` I cannot have you going blank just yet, stay with me, my love. ``

His words went in one ear and out the other, but as soon as you felt the cold substance be drizzled on your chest, you gasped out his name audibly whilst having your mouth set agape even more. You tried to process one thing at a time yet before you knew it his vein covered hands gripped your breasts with such force that you arched your back into his chest even more, your breath hitching at the suddenness. `` Y-Yes I promise..! ``

Kokushibou's tongue darted to your chocolate-covered nipple first, bathing his taste receptors in the sweet substance all the while sucking greedily on the erected bud. Your moans came out more shaky each time a groan emitted from his esophagus, the vibrations transferring to your own body that just made your pleasure enhanced senses skyrocket. `` The chocolate may be sweet..- `` Kokushibou paused. `` ..But you taste sweeter. ``

His mouth moved from one nipple to the other, repeating the action of licking your chest clean that had you seeing stars at that point. The roughness of his thrusts still kissing just against your cervix sending constant tsunamis of intense pleasure throughout your entire being was starting to become mind numbing as your climax was slowly approaching. 

`` Ko-Kokushibou- ah! I'm going to.. cum-! `` You shouted out above your moans, your mouth being left agape due to the sudden pace change of force being put into the plunging of his cock going deeper and deeper inside you with each loud mewl of his name. It was driving him crazy having your nails dig further into his back that was bound to leave marks clear as day, yet he did not mind because the pain was one of the only things keeping him from losing himself in the pleasure your slick-covered walls were giving him. He merely groaned in response, nodding rapidly, not wanting to answer in coherent words in view of the fact that his tongue was still gathering any remaining chocolate on your chest, trailing the wet muscle up your neck and leaving yet another bite mark next to the one he left earlier.

`` I want you- fuck- I want you to know how beautiful you are.. inside and out..-`` Kokushibou said, his tone being more rugged than before feeling his own climax approach ever so slowly, building up to release his load within your depths. The swelling within your core would not stop growing until eventually your mind was painted white, releasing on your lover's cock and squeezing your eyes shut to truly savor the feeling of your walls being coated with your cum that continued to spasm around his cock.

Just as you were still lost in a shocked state of your orgasm, your face was suddenly gripped by two masculine hands, being forced to look at the owner in his eyes that read "Upper Moon One." `` I'm going to cum inside you, and you better be appreciative of every single drop, otherwise there will be consequences.``

You simply nodded as quickly as you could, his thrusts still not faltering. Although with one slam of his hips against yours, his seed is suddenly erupting inside you, your eyes now rolling back once more at the feeling of being filled to the brim. You felt full to say the least, since your cum was mixed with his, swelling your tummy even. A deep and breathy groan escaped Kokushibou's lips as he continued to release his cum within your aching cunt that seemed to milk him dry with each throb. 

The demon had finally stilled once his peak of pleasure had finally settled down, his body still hovering above yours as his 3 pairs of eyes could not tear themselves from your whorish expression. Your cheeks had a few tear stains, as well as your eyes being bloodshot and rolled into the back of your head, your mouth being left hanging open that had saliva dripping from your twitching lips. It was an amusing sight to say the least to Kokushibou, for seeing you in such a ruined state could instantly get his cock hard again at the thought of him being able to make you see other worlds with his length alone. His calloused hand caressed your face, a gentle action that brought you back to your senses, being able to focus on his handsome face again. 

There was a loving smile on your face that was small - but there, even though your face was practically ruined. You leaned into his hand and closed your eyes, allowing yourself to melt into the warmth of his palm that you craved to feel in a gentle manner. You both had heavy breathes, trying to desperately regain oxygen after using your energy for such a scandalous act, yet the male before you used his energy to lay beside you, now turning you around so that your back is pressed against his chest and your leg raised by his other free hand. `` If you think I was done with you [Y/N], then you are sadly mistaken. I want you to remember that you are beautiful whether you think so or not. So answer me, do you believe you are beautiful? ``

`` Yes of course I do..!- ``

`` That did not sound so convincing my love, I suggest you need to be reminded again. ``

◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇