#petition for murph to stop making 'conventionally attractive' every npcs defining characteristic

[ruby-red-inky-blue]

random notes on naddpod c1 ep 46-69

another confused jumble of personal highlighs, shared here in lieu of chewing my very indifferent friends’ ears off irl. For whom it may concern.

spoiler warning! you will get no context but still

Okay they’re in the feywild and somehow the players manage to get even hornier. I guess I’m impressed?

That libertarian fairy tho. Why are little pixie jerks with trash politics always so funny

(Emily catches on to their opponent being a woman because Murph made a point of referring to the knight with they/them pronouns) “Interesting. My subtle sexism gave me away. I’m a bad guy.”

This lady spent a year with her frozen children in a chest in her living room?! Okay. Sure. Uh huh. Cool story bro 😬

Five Guys Burgers and... Flies

Ngl a little shocked at how decent Murph’s elf voice is

“I know a game! It’s called ‘don’t stab me!’ I give the gnome a knife.” “He magically produces some bread, spreads some butter on it, and casts produce flame. Look! Magical toast!” “NOBODY EAT THAT!!”

“You two haven’t seen each other in a while, and the kids are indisposed, so -“ “Okay. Jesus Christ. I was down for kind of a spicy joke there, but let’s not… the kids aren’t indisposed because they went bowling with their aunt, the kids are frozen with a curse.”

Murph, as a gnome, but barely keeping it together: “In actual recorded episodes, have you guys met any gnomes that are murderers? Really, did they murder someone? Like… what did they do and then what did you do to them…?”

"There's a war coming, and everyone needs to fight. Even old men who don't know how." First of all, this is a banger of a line

but also my degree has officially ruined me for stories because I was immediately and ominously reminded of the last months of WWII on the Axis side what with all the apocalypse rhetoric and poorly armed children and old men sent out to probably die in war. like this is 100 percent unintentional and I realise that but my reaction to this line was "holy shit" and then immediately "... has Alanis also gone fascist"

Murph usually: Oh you want something? You want something to help you out here? Okay how are you gonna pay for that? What are you gonna give up to get that? Murph with Emily: Oh you got attached to your purely decorative fictional earrings? … I would never take those away from you keep them :) have a magical gun on the house :)

“Cool it with the fucking drugs!” “Hardwon, you’re one to talk!!”

Love it when Murph sets up a high DC on something and they get it and all immediately vigorously come for his ass, there is truly nothing funnier than people pretending to take something so personally

Murph keeps saying “she shakes her head yes” which is either an established bit of world building or an odd Murphism they’ve all collectively decided to accept? Both are very endearing but also I was so confused the first five times he did it

Local catholic desperately trying to get his friends to have the biblically correct response to angels (fear)

“Twenty-three damage with an axe???!” in the squeakiest voice possible, and then in the same voice: “What lands first, his body or his head?” “His head!!!!”

Finally someone makes the “Janie’s got a gun” joke, I have no idea why but I’ve waited this entire fight for someone to do that! Thank you Caldwell!

“Can I do a dog whistle?” “You’re gonna say something racist and see if they follow it?”

“Brothers! The Goddess has blessed us! There is milk in this casket!”

Also somehow every joke gets 100 percent funnier once it has managed to break the DM

“I summon Pellor’s four Lieutenants, the Beach Boys.”

Pawpaw as the BOB's legal council is the gift that keeps on giving. I don't even remember how it started but every time Jake goes "a brilliant legal mind" in that reverent voice I lose my shit. Also I adore how at the beginning it was all 'oh it's funny because Hardwon thinks this possum is actually good at law stuff and meanwhile Pawpaw can't fucking read' and now Pawpaw is just. legitimately functioning as their lawyer.

“Balnor, what’s your favourite food?” *audible fuckfuckfuckfuck silence from Murph* “…Chicken.”

So anticlimactic. Holy shit. Murph literally rigging the game so none of the others would give it away only to have that immediately blow up in his face

“Oh, the Goblinity!”

Hardwon getting really into "Chasing Cars"

Murph's cultural knowledge is such a fucking enigma to me every time I'm like "oh that guy wouldn't know anything ab-" and then he just. knows the first song on Snow Patrol's "Eyes Open" off the top of his head. I spent a whole vacation listening exclusively to that CD as a teen and I had to look it up. He was right. He wasn’t even the one who started the Snow Patrol bit.

Anyway thank you everyone that song will be permanently stuck in my head for the next five to eight business days

“You deserve a little emo phase”

“Pawpaw is giving you a pedicure. Meanwhile the king is suffocating in the bag.” “Oh shit!”

“So one thing you know about me is that everything I love dies so, stay away, haha!”

“I have enough queens.”

There have been a bunch of uncomfortable descriptors in this campaign but “like an exotic sunkissed lover” is definitely the worst one so far. Murph. Sir. No.

-

Just Murph's weak "okay..." as Emily decides to sniff the two Hardwons' necks to suss out the doppelganger

The verve of Murph’s Moonshine impression compared to his barely-there attempt to do a Jake voice for Hardwon

That one incredibly dumb dude in Shadowfell. Oh my GOD. Like in so many stories there is a “dumb” character, you know, one who will be described with the one brain cell meme but this dude. This dude literally only has the one brain cell. Just enough to be standing, breathing and talking at the same time. Fucking incredible. Murph continues to be way too good at making characters so deeply pathetic

“Go drink too much cough syrup!” “I can’t!” “Why?” “‘cause it tastes bad, man!”

Brennan’s and Murph’s genuine excitement to reverse their usual dynamic veering off into “we’re 69-ing now but he’s been going at me for a long time and I haven’t given him anything.” in less than thirty seconds

Seriously tho you can hear both Brennan and Murph buzzing with delight at a frequency that could shatter glass

“Brennan, you can say ‘my’. You’re playing, dude, you can say ‘my’.” “My hand, me, I’m playing, I’m a person! I’m only one person!” “You’re playing!” “You’re doing it!”

“What about Melv? Remember Melv? He’s dead.”

Brennan has so much knowledge of like historical customs and everyday items and their names and uses but rarely uses it, and meanwhile Murph is trying his damndest to sprinkle stuff in for medieval flavour but has a shaky grasp on what these things actually ARE. Case in point, Brennan immediately knowing how to explain a wimple vs. Murph claiming the peasant was wearing “suspenders over a dirty tunic”. Suspenders?? My guy. What are they holding up? The hem of the tunic? Tunics go OVER the leg garment how would this work. Are you using this as a fancy word for shirt. Also suspenders weren’t a thing until the 19th century. Not saying you can’t mix and match cowboy and medieval peasant aesthetic but it’s gotta logistically work, Murph! It's gotta make sense!

“You hear a woman screaming-“ “No, Murph, we were going shopping 😩” “You never let us do anything fun!”

Brennan’s little love language of absorbing every last bit of his friends’ worlds’ lore like a sponge so he can weave his narrative and/or character into the world like a perfect medieval tapestry!!!!

Every time Emily goes out of her way to back up her every move with rules as written not for the DM but for some idiot in the audience, my heart breaks a bit. Back the fuck off indeed.

That said, Brennan being extra meticulous about HIS finite resources is hilarious and good

“I would say he didn’t have to worry about it but then he was doing sixty points of damage per attack so he does have to worry about it I decided”

#wherewasbalnor

"It's a... I don't want to use the word 'wimple' again"

"Deadeye and Hardwon, you guys just hear this cacophony of idiocy..."

"So my little sister in there and slim with the gift of Pellor, they good at staying on task?" "Um...."

A Kiwi dwarf, fantastic choice. No notes.

“We can crawl through the small false wall?” English is so broken

Pawpaw as Deadeye’s literal right hand! Delightful. Murph’s D20 TA energy come to life in the coolest way

“You bloodsucking bourgeoise pig, you keep your dirty fangs off my sister!”

“You’re the best part of me” Brennan 😭 Emily 😭 brb dissolving into a puddle on the floor for a second

He’s back in the Crick UGH 💔 ah fuck Brennan and Murph tag-teaming on the heartbreak never fails to get me

It's so fascinating how much they play to each other's strengths whenever they're really going for the jugular: on D20, Brennan will hit Murph with just the most quietly awful version of "here's your character's worst (perceived) failure you can never fully make right, and you're faced with an opportunity to try but we both know you won't take it" (cf. Kug's interactions with David or "you can go to the castle where the dogs are or you can go back to your frog pond"), and in return Murph took Deadeye back to the home that was forever lost to him and that he'd missed so much and let him become everything he ever wanted to be. Forgiven despite his shortcomings. They're beating each other at their own game, Murph's stories are so much about consequences and guilt and responsibility and Brennan's are so much about hope and grace and second chances, and that is so present in the stories they tell for each other?? I am upset this is beautiful

The Wimple Warriors

So Murph knew enough about Snow Patrol to not only sing the refrain of You’re All I Have but to know where it was on the album… but not enough to remember the title of Chasing Cars?? How are you the way that you are

JV!! God that *was* a beautiful scene though, such immediate quiet kindness, what a way to go <3

“I went to the Red Fenn and all I got was unceremoniously murdered.”

“He’s saying yes too much, we’re making some kind of mistake…”

Moonshine: "The rapport spores got hacked, everyone! Don't say anything you wouldn't tell the world right now!" Emily, not five minutes before this, on a very popular podcast: "Out of character, [unlike Moonshine] I got some very recently, but..."

The fact that this moment got no audible reaction and is as easily removable as an audio clip can get (no crosstalk, a brief pause before and after it, no impact on what was said afterwards) but it's still left in is so funny knowing who does the editing

Murph introducing a skeletal kitty for thinly veiled emotional manipulation purposes

*delivers upsetting news to Moonshine* "Would it make you feel better if you borrowed my cat?" "...Moonshine bursts into tears."

"Pawpaw looks hurt and betrayed for a second, like he's gonna turn away, but then he can't help it." "Should we go, too, or do you think she needs a familiar touch tonight? Something only Pawpaw can give..." I reiterate, funniest. self-insert. character. ever. Also as ever excellent punnage from Caldwell.

“You are a freak but you’re pretending not to be, which makes you the most boring kind of person.”

“Pawpaw is the only one who has complete plot armour. I will kick him from time to time, but I won’t kill him.” It's so unlike Murph to declare plot armour on anyone, and also so like him to have it be Pawpaw.

Hardwon and Moonshine's relationship, regardless of where it's going, is just lovely. Zero judgement, no expectations, just so much affection and support. They're so corny (affectionate)