#people who sing james' praise and then put lily under a mircroscope

[thejilyship]

The way it's always only misogyny that people come out to defend whenever it's called out in fandoms, and with arguments that don't work in those specific cases. And as you said this goes for all fandoms, literally, every fandom I've ever been in over many, many years has the exact same problem and the exact same excuses to justify it when called out and those always fall apart when you see they don't use the same standards for male characters as they do for female characters.

I've even seen a big blog that answers asks about general fandom culture reply to someone complaining about misogyny with: "it's everywhere, get over it"

I don't think you should have to get over it.

Call it out, call it what it is, and try and do better.

I think people get defensive about this topic for the same reason they get defensive about other call outs in fandom, and that's because fandom is a precious space for a lot of people. They don't want there to be problems in the space where they feel safe, and so they would rather find alternative reasons for the problems. They would rather the problems be person specific, or problems that are my fault because I didn't block someone or I was looking in the wrong tag or I just misunderstood what the point of something is.

When I say 'the hp fandom has a lot of misogyny that it needs to work on,' that's not directed at any one person. That's not the start of an argument. That's just a statement of fact.