#people are free to disagree with this but it's just how i feel about the topic

[beemovieerotica]

warning for talking about OCD related paranoia, please don't feel pressured to respond to or even read this if that might bother you.

I just rly want an opinion on this from someone else who has ocd, and I literally dont know anyone who might understand and wouldn't treat me like I'm crazy. The new administration has affected my ocd so badly. I'm so stressed every day about the possibility of any information that I've put online, publically or "privately," over the course of my whole life being dug up and used to incriminate me somehow. Such as anything expressing views the administration disagrees with. Which has been a worry of mine for a while but it has ramped up with all that's going on recently. And the thing is I know that that's not entirely outside of the realm of possibility, but I dont know how likely it is. I dont know where reasonable concern starts and ocd begins. And I get like literally paralyzed with stress over this. Have you experienced anything like this and if so what did you do about it? Thank you if you read this.

yes 100%, I think a lot of fear of what's going on can be compounded by OCD beyond what is helpful to protect one's self.

I'm not going to provide reassurances here because that's one of the big no-no's of talking to someone with OCD: it turns into a cycle of us seeking reassurance from others in a way that can escalate our behavior and place an undue burden on others. And it ultimately doesn't work.

on my own end, I need to put hard limits on how much reading the news I do, otherwise it can literally go on for hours as I keep searching out tiny bits of new information that will supposedly help calm me down. but the relief doesn't ever happen. I just get mentally fatigued and shut down, and that's not the same thing as relief. at a certain point I have to just do a hard pivot. completely change scenery, change tasks, do something new to get my brain off that path.

I think limiting fear spirals related to current events would be the first step in reducing overall anxiety, since that goes hand in hand with upticks in OCD behavior.

I've been able to exposure-therapy myself slowly on this blog, but I can't say that will work with everyone. I show my face, people know my first name, etc - it's something I'm able to afford to do as an adult and it's helped me overcome some of the fears of ever being known, and of having my political stances be connected to me.

there are other more tangible ways to dip into free and open expression - consider writing a letter to a public official, getting out and supporting queer events in-person, or even just dropping a $10 donation for a cause - something that puts you in a community or attaches your name to a community that needs help, little by little.

I think there may be a pivot point where that fear can be channeled into action, like a "fuck it, I'm doing this" attitude. and you can feel *good* defying your OCD when it comes with that realization of, "hey, I like these people. I like being in this space." some of the wildest things I ever did in my life were a "fuck you" to OCD, powering through the warning sirens in my head and I ended up with experiences and friends I never thought I'd ever have. I think this is one of those times where really crucial communities are being born out of this intense hardship and stress, and we all need each other. OCD thrives in isolation, and you've gotta have a support network to help you live your best life despite it.