#p'aof please never leave gmmtv because you literally never fail us

[nong-nao]

I am so overwhelmed from this episode, literally the most conflicted this show has ever left me in emotions and I think it has a lot to do with the fact that it is mostly in Pat’s pov this episode.

The show up until this point has been mostly in Pran’s pov and we all know how he feels, it’s been clear from the beginning. Nanon does such a great job at portraying all of the emotions that Pran would be feeling, really bringing to life the whole phrase "showing not telling." Ohm has also done well portraying Pat because this whole time he'd been acting “normal” since he didn't feel anything to his knowledge romantically for Pran.

This episode, you could feel the aloofness and confusion Pat has in the beginning where he’s almost trying to push all of his feelings in Ink’s direction but that’s not where they are and deep down he knows it. When he coincidentally [probably not since we saw that Pran had has Pat and Ink together] meets Pran at the music shop, he starts thinking about his interaction with him with Pa's hints of romantic interest. It's so brilliantly directed too because it's not Pat thinking about how Pran sees him [like what he was doing with Ink in the cafe?] but it's him taking an introspective approach of this what he is feeling. The idea of him liking Pran in that way scares him; thinking back on the Just Friends? lyrics, he’s probably feeling insecure and hesitant about it because Pran is important to him and they really are in such a confusing place.

Wai acts as a catalyst almost for Pat to realize his emotions because he can sense that there’s something more between Wai and Pran or at least he’s filling in dots with them because he’s consumed by his own jealousy, not only romantically but in a friendship way that almost says how can you be so close to someone else and hide me? lf we really think about it, Pat’s closest friend or confidante is Pa i mean if i had friends like his, I also wouldn’t confide in them with my deepest thoughts, Pat has probably also felt so guilty about being seen as Pran's bad luck that he never really got close to other people so they wouldn't get hurt and neither would he. I also could just be thinking to much about it. The song was just the tipping point for Pat since the song symbolized their cursed relationship even if at the time he said it in a joking manner and Pran chose to play it with Wai, someone who can easily be in Pran’s life. Pran’s mom likes him and invites him into the house for dinner, even lets him spend the night, not to mention that they are protective of each other as well. For pat to see them together and then celebrating as if nothing special had happened, it’s a huge slap in the face. On a regular day if Pran had won the contest, Pat would have teasingly congratulated him and said some sny remark, but so much has happened that it just can’t be the case for them. Pran pushing him away and putting distance between the two, trying so hard to hide their secret relationship, whatever it may be, from Wai just makes Pat angrier at the circumstances. After all he was waiting for Pran to come home and it ended in something much bigger than he would have wanted.

All of these events build up so much tension for the final scene, which left me shocked going to through a whirlwind of emotions. Pat ,when he finally finds Pran, breaks down in such a calm but hurt way all about how their relationship is so confusing. That it's so tiring being the sons of families who put them against each other, always having to be aware of the other, but that he wouldn't have wanted it another way because it was lonely not having him in his life even if he could breathe better. Pran, obviously the audience knowing his own side, cries hearing this because he also feels and knows the conflict of their relationship all too well. They're not enemies, but they can't be friends, what can they be really when they both want to be more than that? The first kiss, I can only imagine how conflicted they would both be feeling. Pran, probably confused by how this whole night went down, still trying to calm down and then be met with the lips of the man that he has loved on his own for years. He has wanted this moment for so long that he brought Pat back in for another kiss, which only eased Pat's worries going into the kiss in the first place because he didn't know the other's emotions or rather he never accepted them to be real before that night. Their whole relationship over their lives, every possible emotion was in that kiss, and that is what made it so overwhelming. So when it finally came to an end, Pran was met with the reality of this kiss and what can't be or what shouldn't be, maybe also how they were in a fight just minutes before. Pat just being crushed after being relieved that this kiss was mutual, meaning the feels were mutual as well, but watching Pran walk away leaving him feel that it was a mistake. Just so powerful, seriously major kudos to everyone that went into the production of this show.