#over the last like 5 years i've analyzed that and hmmm might be onto something there lmao | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tomandgeriatric · 2 years

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I didn't really sleep much at alllll last night....like...i "went to bed" finally at like 6:30 am....i have to work at 8 am. I can't tell if its the medication, or just my own dumb brain keeping me up at night. I've always had problems falling asleep, not staying asleep, but falling asleep.

#personal #i am so tired #it could be the meds? they are a stimulant #but it could just be my own dumb insomnia brain #brain won't shut up the most at night time.#like #i couldn't sleep at 6:30am because my brain wanted me to know what 300 divided by 8 was and would not let me rest til i whipped out my calc #and it's always shit like this.#maybe i do have OCD lmao looping repeating thoughts in my head that i cannot contril #*control #thats actually what landed me in therapy when i was a teen.#couldn't sleep because my brain was telling me that i was gonna kill myself in my sleep??? I was not necessarily suicidal but i was scared #and like #so my whole 4 years of therapy i was concerned about being bipolar because my mom and her father are and its genetic #and on the fuckin LAST session ever my therapist was like 'yeah i don't think you are bipolar as much as i think you have OCD'#AND THEN NO MORE THERAPY EVER AGAIN AFTER THAT CUZ I WAS 18 AND KICKED OFF MOM'S INSURANCE LOL #over the last like 5 years i've analyzed that and hmmm might be onto something there lmao

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