#our crew isn't ready but this cannot be ignored

[academyz-coolezt-crew]

SEE????????????????????

Hi Freddie! I believe you said you were having a rough time hacking, or rather, uh, journalistically accessing, the information from Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham’s internet devices…. Well, I happen to be fairly good at things like that. Here are the wedding photos… I have reason to believe they cooked the photographer afterwards instead of hiring catering service… regardless, here’s your scoop!

THANK YOU SO MUCH, TATTLER! Your devotion to MAKING TATTLECRIME THRIVE is ASTOUNDING! These two OLD MEN look SURPRISINGLY CUTE TOGETHER. I'm surprised that there isn't any BLOODY CARNAGE hiding in the background! After all, they are MURDER HUSBANDS! I have to ask -- how did you manage to GET A HOLD of these DIAMONDS? Don't worry -- YOUR SECRETS ARE SAFE WITH MS. LOUNDS!

[limenysnocket]

Japanese Denim

Summary: You're free to travel with Taika again. Where to go? Think about it. For the past year, Taika has been bingeing anime non-stop, and his closet is full of the Japanese culture. What better place... Japan.

Pairing: Taika Waititi x Reader

Warnings: Baecation- fluff, swearing.

Words: 2.1k

A/N: This is for @fineanddandy 's lovely little challenge, and I've always wanted to go to Okinawa so this is an opportunity to do some research for fun and for my amusement.

@olyvoyl @honorarytenenbaum @dandywaititi @mrtommyshelby @whatwememeintheshadows​

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"Thank you! And enjoy your stay at the Henn na Hotel!"

"How many times a day do you get served by a fucking dinosaur? Are you kidding me?" Taika was bouncing all the way to your room. His hand gestures only got wider by the second. "And this place is desolate. I'm starting to think the robots killed everyone for fuel."

"This isn't a Y2K situation, dumbass. It's like... the aftermath of that. And if robots actually needed to travel places," you shrugged, rolling your suitcase away from divots in the carpet.

This is where you chose to stay in Nagasaki. They called it the Henn na Hotel, where everything (absolutely everything) was ran by robots. No living staff, except for the maintenance crew. Nothing. They even gave you a little robot companion in your room that was like a moving Alexa with glowing eyes and an eerie, childish voice. It would even sing nursery rhymes if you asked it politely. But as Taika had exclaimed about when he was first booking his stay at the hotel, you had the choice to check in with a robotic raptor at the front desk. Of course, there were perfectly normal human robots, but those didn’t excite him as much.

And what could make this better? It was in the middle of a makeshift Dutch theme park called Huis Ten Bosch with nightly live performances and a walk of lights that would make you think you're on some sort of drug trip.

A lot of this was weird to you. Immediately, as soon as you got off the plane, both you and Taika had to take a safety course with a few other men and women. From earthquakes, to fires, to emergency evacuations. You were thinking your jet lag was going to be the worst part of your trip. You didn't get to go to sleep until you reached your hotel room. Which was hours later.

You woke back up at seven o'clock at night with Taika passed out right beside you. Dusk was just beginning to creep along the horizon. You walked to your window and pulled open the curtains. The sight amazed you. You gathered yourself up, throwing on some clothes, then tossing a pair at your sleeping boyfriend.

Taika woke up, completely disgruntled and still very sleepy. "Babe, what the fuck," he murmured, rubbing his eyes with a palm and clearly not ready to get up yet.

“Just shut up and get your clothes on. We’re going to have fun,” you whispered through the thin air of your hotel room. Begrudgingly, he got up and started to get dressed. Just a pair of shorts, his chucks, and a plain t-shirt. Nothing too eccentric since you did not want to draw in attention. Once he was ready, you were dragging him downstairs. Outside of your building, there was a slew of people walking around. Not too much to suffocate, but enough to know that humanity was thriving outside of your little robot-ran hotel room.

Passed all the people, Taika saw what excited you. It was dark now, and the throngs of lights coating each building you saw, were now on. The virtual reality merry-go-round was up and running, and live performances went on the little stage. People were gathered around every attraction, but Taika went to the performance first.

It was all bright dancing and wild colors. People were in front of the stage, doing the dances too with some kind of glee on their faces. It really was bizarre, since you and Taika seemed to be the only ones without eye masks on.

Taika tried his best to join in with the dancing, but really couldn’t catch on. Unless it was Michael Jackson’s, “Thriller,” or something he made up on the spot, the man cannot dance in sync. But, it was still fun to watch him try, so, you kept encouraging him, even though he was a mess. It was payback for all the times he messed with you. Like stealing your favorite hoodie.

He was ready for more of the tour when he was finished, and what you figured might be your night of taking him around, turned into his. You didn’t mind. He was taking you to the places you wanted to go anyway. Through the forest of lights, down the glowing river, and you enjoyed the night water shows that were also lit up with bright techno colors. As a treat... you even let him have a look at the One Piece ship they have floating in the harbor.

Finishing up your night, you decided to take a stroll on Umbrella street. They were lit up in a lovely blue and pink color. All the stores that lounged on the sides were closing up, and there weren’t many people left lingering around the lights. Eventually, you and Taika were the only ones left. Your arm was wrapped around Taika’s, and all you could stare at was the lights. He had one hand in his pocket, and he let you lean most of your weight on him. It had only been a couple of hours since you started to take a look around, but you were tired again. The jet lag still hadn’t completely wore off, you supposed, and it showed.

“Come on,” Taika murmured into your ear, “Let’s get back to our room.”

It was another fifteen minutes before the park was totally shut down and was no longer accepting guests. You both drowsily made your way up to your hotel room, where your tiny robot friend was waiting for you, asking what time you were going to wake up. It was annoying, but the exhaustion made it easy to ignore. You got back into your pajamas, crawled into bed with Taika, and went to sleep.

The next morning, you were up bright ad early. The little robot friend on your desk still asked what time you were going to wake up. It would take care of itself, hopefully. The park was getting ready to open, by the time you left with Taika on your arm. From Nagasaki’s airport, you took a small plane over to Naha, Okinawa, where you would spend the rest of your day, walking about in your swimsuit, until the sun set.

White sand, beautiful beaches, exquisite sushi, and odd looking statues that you had to ask the locals about. From shrines, to snakes, to boardwalks, it was all here, and you were going to take in all of it. 

Instead of staying in a lavish resort for the day, you and Taika just walked, took the monorail, or took a bike cab everywhere. Most of the time you were there, however, you spent on the beach. The crystalline waters called to you from a distance, and it just looked so blue! You couldn’t help yourself.

Taika went searching for shellfish, but he liked to spend time with you in the water. It was about twenty or so minutes in when he splashed a large amount of water at you. You spluttered, since most of it landed in your face. You wiped your eyes and caught him, holding his hands behind his back and carelessly looking around as if he had done nothing wrong. You didn’t buy his act, obviously, and you splashed back at him. To him, you had just declared war, and things were going to get serious.

Waves and waves of water were sent flying through the air, and both of you were drenched in battle. With how much you were moving, you were sure you scared all the fish away from the water.

At the very end, neither of you were sure who won, but you were both happy and tired. You took the opportunity to rest on the beach, laying on your stomach on a towel and enjoying the warm sunlight while it lasted. Taika sat beside you once he was satisfied with his search for shells. You took your time to go through some of his little collection and ended up being thoroughly impressed with his find. You found a few conch shells, but your favorite by far had to be the spider conch that he found. It was small, and could fit in the palm of your hand, but you still enjoyed the shape and color. He let you keep it.

After a long day, you decided to stop in a restaurant to grab something to eat. It was a lovely mom and pop shop that was based on soba noodles and sea food. There was floor seating, or there were tables and chairs. Taika picked fast and it was right to the floor seating. Tatami matts and plush cushions provided a much cozier atmosphere than first suggested. When the time to order food came around, you both had a lot to cover. Playing at the beach worked up an appetite. The people working were more than happy to oblige to your needs and would feed you the best food anyone could make.

With your food came traditional Sake and two tiny teacups of herbal teas. With a table covered in food, and alcohol thrown into the mix, the night would last a very long time. Yet, you still had a plane to catch by the end of it. You stayed as long as possible, ate as much as you could stomach, and drank a lot more Sake than you would like to admit, but hey, you still had an amazing time. Not to mention how much attention Taika was getting from passers by. He could get quite loud, and those who could understand or speak English were drawn to his boisterous aura.

You left the restaurant, fat and happy, as well as Taika. After gathering up your shoes and changing out of your wet clothes, you took a plane to Osaka, then took the train the rest of the way to the small town of Karuizawa. Taika had booked a pension for the night, and it would be capping off your small vacation with him in Japan.

The pension was a small, red roofed building, just outside of the shopping district. Luckily, the lights were still on by the time you made it in. The buzz of the Sake still had quite the grip on you, so you let Taika do most of the talking. It took a minute, since the people running the place had to send out for someone who spoke English, but the waiting wasn’t all that bad. You got the chance to take a look at the beautiful stone garden outside of the window.

Again, the place you were staying wasn’t fancy or as nice as the robotic one you stayed in, but it was still comforting. They gave you a king-sized bed in a big bedroom with circular windows, a living room, large bathroom, and a mini kitchen. The remnants of the complimentary dinner they had served a few hours before you arrived still wafted through the air.

After long showers and setting out clothes for tomorrow (Taika insisted he wear his denim kimono), you both sat in the small living room for some time, trying to make sense of a random game show that played on the television. Taika had his arm wrapped around your shoulders, his body still pleasantly warm from his shower and the rose petal soap he used tickled your sense of smell. His hair was still dripping with water, and little beads of it would fall onto his broad shoulders. Your hands were fiddling with the spider shell he had given you earlier, and you just looked on at the television ahead, struggling to stay awake.

“Doing okay?” Taika muttered to you, sounding quite tired himself. You gave him a low hum in response and tucked your nose into his shirt. You wrapped your arms around him, and he didn’t seem to mind at all.

“Did you have a good time?” He always liked to reassure himself with you, to make sure you were always happy and satisfied with the things he picked out. You gave him another hum, but in a more approving tone than last time. He blew a laugh through his nose and leaned his head back, resting it on the couch and staring at the ceiling for a time.

“Good...” he said again softly, “I’m glad you did...”