#only asking because i thought i might've had a single game on my phone but i just checked and i don't. celibacy gif

[loserfae]

ok but for real

[marshmallowprotection]

How do you think the twins feel about having fans in rae? I'm sure they appreciate the public support, but going from no one knowing about you to everyone having that much information about you and your family history must be so uncomfortable

Everything there is to know about the twins is known. People think of them as celebrities by the time we return to Saeran's After Ending. As of the start of that event, it's been almost two months since the first reveal was brought to light, give or take a few days, and in that time, a lot of people have made a spectacle out of them. I mean, look at all of the buzz that happened around SevenStar drink!

Yoosung was one of the ones promoting the soda online in support of Saeyoung! People weren't buying it because they wanted to support the orphanages that the money was supposed to be going to. They were buying everything because they wanted to have a piece of the spectacle. Sure, some of them might've done that, had they known it was the deal between Saeyoung and Chairman Han... but.

I mean, the money was going to the best place it could go to, but make no mistake, I have not a single doubt in my mind that most people wanted to pick up the drink because it had to do with the publicity of all of this. the publicity of all of this. As far as I can tell, people aren't thinking about the humanity in the situation, they're thinking about everything else. 

Imagine what would happen in this universe we live in right now if the leader of a country had illegitimate children revealed, alongside the fact that he apparently kidnapped one of those kids? That's national news, if not worldwide because that kind of event is not something that you can sweep under the rug. Even if everybody thought it was hearsay or some kind of ruse from the get-go, everybody would be talking about it nonetheless.

How could you simply let it slide that a leader you voted for is implied to have done something horrible?

It's just not plausible to avoid it!

Look at this conversation you can have with Yoosung's friend from college who is a "fan" of the twins. Everyone thinks the boys are very handsome and I can't blame them for that, because it is true. But, people are interested in them because of their looks and because of the outright celebrity of the situation.

Everybody wants to be seen with them because it'll boost anything and everything on their social media. Do I think that there are people out there who heard the story that the boys went through and are sympathetic and want to support them for the right reasons?

Oh, yes, I do believe that, but in reality, I know that a lot of people are very shallow.

Unfortunately, there's only so much we hear about public opinion so I can only draw speculation from the people that we are allowed to hear from and interact with in the game when it comes to what all of these people think about the boys.

We even get a lot of support from Yoosung’s mother when we get the chance to speak to her! Her comments are the ones that remind me that not everybody is interested in the boys just because of how pretty they think they are, there are people who genuinely do not like the prime minister and always assumed something underhanded was going on, and now they only have confirmation. 

Another example is the outgoing message on Jaehee’s phone. Out of all of the questions that you could decidedly ask somebody about the boys, why are all of you calling about his hair color? 

More than anything, I know that Saeran doesn't know how to react to any of this.

All he wants to do is live an ordinary life, as an ordinary man, and now he's never going to be able to do that. People are constantly going to think about him even if the news of what he went through fades and calms down eventually, Everyone is always going to know his name and his story. It'll get easier as everything goes by and there's more time to think about the way the world is moving, but I do know one thing, from how he reacted on that phone call with Yoosung’s friend?

He's easily flustered and he doesn't know how to respond to people that supposedly support him and like him because he's not used to that. 

I think he's the kind of person who would be too nice to tell anybody no if they wanted to take a picture with him, or if they wanted to share conversation with him.

Because he is the kind of person that would like to sit down with other people and talk to them, and as long as it doesn't eat too much into his day, I feel like he wouldn't mind the celebrity too much, but if it gets in the way of him being able to have a normal life, then there would have to be a conversation about doing something or changing something to be able to get the piece of privacy he deserves. 

The only thing I'm really worried about are people who aren't going to be considered of his boundaries in the future, you know the people I'm talking about, people who will hit on or make him uncomfortable. That is something that a lot of celebrities have to go through, and we see it with Jumin and Zen, especially. I don't want to think about those details but I know it's something that could happen regardless of how many boundaries he puts up. I know him well enough to say that he would tell people like it is, but he shouldn't have to do that in the first place. 

More likely than not, he's going to be able to survive that situation through the support of everyone around him, and as long as the people around him who consider themselves his fans learn how to interact with him, it won't be a problem. Just let the man enjoy a grocery trip with his partner, please.

He's not asking much. 

God. I don't even know where to start on Saeyoung.

He has been suffering through this Non-Stop and when he is spit out on the other side, he has to learn that the entire world knows about him and there's nothing he can do about it. He is the kind of person who has lived in paranoia his entire life. He is still a paranoid man to this day.

He can't trust anybody and he doesn't want to trust anybody. The only people he can sincerely trust are those he knew before this all went wrong. He doesn't want to be a celebrity, he doesn't want people to know about him, but if it kept his brother from dying, he'll accept it as a necessary evil. 

He won't say anything at all if his brother doesn't mind. He will always put the needs of his brother before himself. If I can say anything, it's that he's not going to want to talk to anybody or give information to anyone else. I mean, think about it, he has had to live in hiding his entire life, constantly changing his name and persona to be able to survive, and now there is a speeding bullet on his back.

The agency that hired him can't destroy him and his father can't destroy him, but you know who can come after him? The countless people he pissed off when he was doing his job. There are people who know his face even if they never knew his name, and that could always be a problem for him. 

His name, his age, his face, and everything you can think of is just out there. When he subjected himself to going on video after the initial sacrifice on the second day, he knew what was going to happen to him. He knew what was going to happen to everyone else. He only did that because he thought it was the only thing that would be able to get his brother to go far, far, far away.

He sacrificed everything willingly in the name of love. He doesn't want his name and face to be out there. 

He wants to have a private life and I can see him going out of his way to wear disguises and avoid people like wildfire if humanly possible. He will spend a lot of time doing everything he can to make sure that he and his brother cannot be followed or tracked because that's just how his paranoia manifests. Until things get settled, I imagine he would spend a lot of time playing bodyguard if only because it helps him feel more in control of his situation. 

He's never going to adjust to people knowing who he is. He went from one extreme to another and there's no words to describe what that must be like. The price of freedom came at a major cost and the twins have to learn how to live with that.

[wonglix]

➺ sᴡᴇᴇᴛ ᴀs sᴜɢᴀʀ

⤷ baker!y/n x mingi

⤷ mingi was known for being somewhat of an outcast, not letting anyone get close to him. he also appears to have a particularly sweet tooth for your pastries (and you)

⤷ fluff

⤷ 3.5k words

mingi silently watches you pack up another customer's order, his eyes focusing on the warm smile on your face. the sweet smell that is prominent in the bakery is almost overshadowed by the sweetness in your voice and mingi has to blink a few times to snap out of his trance. once it was his turn, he quietly points to the strawberry-lime cupcakes. he skilfully avoids your eyes when you look up at him to ask how many; "six," his voice was calm, contrary to the excessive hammering of his heart in his chest. he doesn't know how it happened, how he became this infatuated with you. there is one thing he does know, though: he absolutely loves the sweets you make. the first time he got to eat one of your deliciously sweet treats was when you brought raspberry crumble bars to school after you made too many the previous day.

"mingi?" the sweet call of his name made him lift his head from his arms, surprise taking over his features when he realised that it was you standing in front of his desk. he stared up at you silently, making you awkwardly clear your throat, "i just wanted to ask you if you'd like some of the raspberry crumble bars i made?". he kept silent, staring at the small piece of dessert you were holding out to him. his silence began to make you nervous, anxiously pulling back, "i-it's fine if you don't want one, i'll just-"he stops your rambling by taking the crumble bar from you, making you look down at him in surprise, "thank you.". nodding enthusiastically you sent him a small, nervous smile.

you hurried back to your own desk, sitting down and eyeing mingi curiously. mingi had placed the crumble bar on his desk instead of eating immediately which, quite frankly, disappointed you a bit. you were excited to see his reaction, to see if he enjoyed it. you never got to witness it though, since mingi never ate it. that what you thought, at least. mingi had saved the treat for later and, unbeknownst to you, ate it on his bus ride home. mingi enjoyed it a lot, the sweet treat filling him with joy and excitement. he always had quite the sweet tooth, but he was convinced that he never had anything as sweet as that raspberry crumble bar from you.

mingi was just about to turn and leave the bakery when you suddenly called out to him, "uhm, mingi? could i talk to you for a second, please?" he's stunned and looks at you, merely nodding silently. a bright smile appears on your face, and you lean over the counter a bit, looking directly into his eyes. "my shift ends in 20 minutes, could you wait until then? just take a seat over there, and i'll come to you as soon as i can, yeah?". mingi didn't know what made him say yes, maybe it was the adorable smile on your face or the excited sparkle in your eyes. he went to sit down at the table you had pointed out previously. he was sitting there, occasionally letting his gazer avert from his phone to you, your eyes meeting more than once. every time your eyes met, you smiled at him, and mingi silently cursed himself for physically feeling his heart speed up every single time. he doesn't know what you want to talk to him about, but it reminds him of one of the few times you've spoken to him, a memory he holds dear to his heart.

he was sitting in the empty classroom, playing some games on his phone waiting for the lunch break to be over. he never really ate lunch, and even if he would, the atmosphere in the cafeteria was overwhelming and too much for him anyway. so he usually spent his lunch break in the classroom on his own, killing time by playing games, listening to music or sometimes even taking a little nap. mingi was so focused on his game that he didn't hear the classroom door opening and closing. neither did he notice the sound of the steps getting closer to him. it's no surprise that he let out a screech once he felt someone tap his shoulder, whipping his head around with a scared look on his face. he was met with your startled eyes, a guilty look on your face. "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to startle you.." you seemed to be legitimately sorry, a small pout forming on your face. mingi cleared his throat and adjusted his posture a bit, "it's... it's fine, don't worry about it." you smile and sit down at the desk next to him. he shifts his gaze from you back to his phone, only to return his eyes to you, growing shy when your eyes meet. "why are you sitting here all on your own?" you break the silence. he looks at you, trying to determine whether your question was serious or not. "i don't eat lunch. i also don't really have friends, so sitting in the cafeteria would be quite sad.". you let out a small giggle, mingi turning to look at you with raised eyebrows. "i'm sorry, it's just...i relate. it's weird sitting in the cafeteria on your own, so i get why you rather spend your time here.". mingi was quite surprised, he always thought that you got along quite well with your classmates.

"you said you don't eat lunch, right?" you sounded curious and genuinely interested in him. it was confusing for him. "um, yeah. i just don't really want to, that's all." you nodded quietly, brows furrowed a bit and thoughts obviously running wild. suddenly you got up and went to your own desk, rummaging through your bag. pulling out a lunchbox you walk back to mingi, sitting down again and looking at him with a smile, "i know you said you don't like to eat lunch, but could you try some of these chocolate brownies? it's a new recipe, and i don't really have anyone that could try them for me, so...". mingi stares at you in disbelief, letting out an airy chuckle, "are you serious?". the second those words left his lips he already knew the answer, your doe eyes looking at him with so much sincerity in them that it made him want to cry. or maybe kiss you, he wasn't sure at the time yet.

"sorry that i kept you waiting, here's chocolate milk for you," you panted out, obviously exhausted from hurrying to keep mingi from waiting any longer. he just shrugged it off, taking a small sip from the chocolate milk, watching you with expecting eyes. "the reason i asked you to stay is that i wanted you to try something for me.". mingi furrows his brows, "try something for you?" you nodded, placing a small box with the bakery's logo on it on the table. mingi reaches out to open it, but he stops in his tracks when you place your hand on top of his, his breath slightly hitching in his throat and he prays that you didn't notice. "there are a few new recipes i tried out and i want to show them to my boss, but i'm not confident enough. so i thought that i'd ask you to try them and if you like them, i'll introduce them to my boss," you muttered softly, your thumb unconsciously drawing circles onto mingi's hand. he can feel his palms getting sweaty again, his heart pounding in his ears and his throat getting dry. it's ridiculous how weak he got at every single small thing you did, but he just couldn't help himself; he was in love.

an hour and plenty of sweets later the two of you still sat at the table, small giggles and brave flirty comments being thrown around. mingi has no idea how this happens, how the two of you fell into such a comfortable conversation. still, he was more than happy that it happened. he knew that his cheeks were probably bright red and that you most likely caught onto his stuttering, but he honestly doesn't care anymore. he has been pining for you for so long, daydreaming about your pretty face and hoping that one day, he'll build up enough courage to finally ask you out. you smile, taking his hand in yours, "thank you for trying them, mingi. i'm glad you liked them, i was a bit worried, to be honest," you giggle a bit, a lovestruck smile creeping its way onto mingi's face at the sound. "they were all delicious. i wasn't expecting anything else though, your treats are always delicious," his voice was soft. because he felt confidence rush through him for a split second he softly intertwines your fingers, a blush dusting his cheeks. the way you smile at him, the blush that spreads from your cheeks to your neck makes him want to kiss you so bad it makes his head spin. "thank you.." your voice was quiet and soft, eyes sparkling and he doesn't know what to do with himself. now would be the perfect time to ask you out, you're so close, you're literally holding hands, and there's no way you'd say no right now, right?

his mind is racing and before he can even begin to think about all the possible ways to ask you out you speak up, "uhm, mingi? would you...would you like to come over to my place? we could make some sweets together since you like them so much..." your voice got quieter with every word, and it made his heart clench. if he wasn't so busy with trying to calm his pounding heart down mingi might've felt proud at the effect he had on you. he speaks up almost too quickly and too enthusiastically. he'll probably beat himself up over it later. still, right now there is nothing he wants more than for you to understand how desperately he wants to go on a date with you. "yeah, yeah, of course. i'd like that, a lot actually.." you smile, a breathy chuckle escaping you at the excitement in his voice, "i'm glad... i'll text you when okay? you remember where i live, right?" he wants the earth to open up and swallow him at the mention of the first and only time mingi has been at your house so far.

the very first time mingi ever set foot in your house was thanks to a project. when the teacher had mentioned that it would be a group project mingi had let out a sigh. it's no wonder that he was somewhat surprised when you called out to him, asking him if he'd like to work with you. how could he possibly say no to that? you smiled and went back to taking notes, leaving mingi to stare at you for a bit longer before he snapped back into reality. you slipped a small piece of paper on his desk, "here's my address and my number. just text me when you're free, alright?". you smiled and waved at him, leaving the classroom. he stared at the folded piece of paper for a while.

that evening he decided to text you, his palms sweaty and heart hammering against his chest. he had always envisioned it to be a nightmare even trying to get your number in the first place, and now that he had it, he didn't know what to do. what was he supposed to say? just a simple "hey"? should he be a little more serious, maybe a "hey. it's me, mingi."? he was overwhelmed, the fear of making a fool of himself nagging at him. gathering up all the courage he had left in that freakishly large body of his he grabs his phone and texts you a simple "hey". pacing around his room, anxiously waiting for an answer from you. and then you answered, making him almost jump out of his skin at the notification sound. it was only a mere "hey :)" from you, but he could've sworn that he felt his heart swell. he was definitely infatuated. you agreed that it would be best if he came over on the weekend and mingi couldn't be happier. perhaps it was wrong to feel like it could be a date, but he was just too excited and in love to think appropriately.

and then saturday came. mingi had changed his outfit several times, struggling with finding something that made him feel comfortable. at some point, he just gave up. he was anxiously playing with his fingers the whole way to your house while trying to come up with conversation starters and things to talk about. mingi stood in front of your home and took a deep breath before ringing the doorbell. not even a minute later you opened the door, greeting mingi with an excited smile on your face.

you worked on your project relentlessly, not much talking going on between the two of you. mingi kept glancing at you from time to time, panic settling within him when you looked up only to find him staring at you. you didn't really seem to mind though, kindly smiling at him each time and quietly going back to work.

"how about i get us some snacks?" you asked while putting down your pen, facing mingi. mingi nods, getting up with you to help when you suddenly turn and smile up at him, gesturing for him to sit back down, "you're my guest, mingi. sit back down, i'll go get it." a few minutes later you came back with a tray full of baked goods and drinks, mingi staring at you in awe. "i know you like sweets, so i made some yesterday. i hope you like them," your voice was so gentle it made mingi blush a bit. the two of you snacked on your treats in silence when mingi accidentally brushed against his cup, sending the drink flying all across the table - ruining your work. "oh..oh my god, i'm so sorry, i-," you interrupted mingi when you rushed to the kitchen, coming back into the living room with paper towels in hand. "y/n, i'm so sorry, i'll rewrite everything i promise, don't-," mingi abruptly stopped his rambling when he felt your hand on his shoulder, a kind smile on your face. "mingi, don't worry about it. it's no big deal, so don't beat yourself up about it, yeah?" how could you be so lovely? mingi didn't know if he should cry or laugh, your kindness catching him off guard once again. he just ruined hours of work, and you're as calm and gentle as ever.

mingi promised himself that he wouldn't make a fool of himself in front of you again. the memories of last time kept swirling around his mind while he was on his way to your house, making him cringe inside. while he was walking down the street, he noticed a small flower shop and stopped dead in his tracks. should he get you flowers? you didn't say that it was a date, but it really feels like one. what if you don't think of it as a date, though? he would look like a total creep turning up with flowers. mingi was unsure and kept going back and forth, settling for a small bouquet of flowers. incase you got weirded out he was absolutely prepared to backtrack and play the bouquet off as a late apology for the last time he came around.

when you opened the door for him, mingi had to keep himself from letting out a small gasp - you looked so pretty, heart melting at your excited smile. he just stared at you, only snapping out of his admiring state when you cleared your throat, looking at him with raised eyebrows and a small, confused smile playing on your lips. "oh! uhm, i-i brought you flowers," he held out the bouquet to you, your eyes sparking when you took them from him. "thank you mingi, so much," you said with excitement in your voice, looking at him with the prettiest smile he's ever seen. leading him inside you beeline for the kitchen, mingi following close behind you.

"i prepared a few different recipes, so i’ll just let you choose. we could make some apple pie bites, strawberry cheesecake, a peach crumble-" your rambling was incredibly endearing to him,  a content smile playing on his face. he wasn't really listening anymore, he'd be happy with anything if it was made by you. and making it with you together? there's nothing more he could ask for. "mingi?" he blinked a few times, looking at you. you were looking up at him with an expectant look on your face. "i'm fine with anything, really," he tried his best to make his voice sound confident. you smiled and went to the refrigerator to get the ingredients. "let's make some dark chocolate cookies with some orange then, alright?". mingi just nods, watching you place multiple different components on the counter. "y/n, i have to be honest...i can't really bake? or even cook, for that matter," his voice dragged a bit at the end. you turned to him, shrugging a bit, "it's fine, don't worry about it. im here to teach you, aren't i?" there was a certain playfulness in your voice made a small grin creep its way onto his face. he was enjoying this laid back atmosphere a lot, his earlier panic and anxiety forgotten entirely.

mingi doesn't really know how it happened. approximately one hour later you were both covered with flour from head to toe, chocolate splatters all over the kitchen and breathless giggles sounding throughout the room. it all started out normal with you explaining the different steps of the recipe to mingi while he was listening intently. at some point he accidentally knocked over the bag of flour, thoroughly dusting you in the white powder. he expected you to go and clean yourself, maybe even make his heart flutter by being an absolute angel again. what he didn't expect was for you to grab a handful of the flour that was spread on the counter, throwing it in his face with small giggles pouring out of you. he was dumbfounded and stared at you, letting out an airy chuckle in disbelief. using his stiffness to your advantage you scoop up some more flour, ruffling his hair. "oh, it's on!" he exclaimed eagerly, dipping his finger into the melted chocolate and smearing it over your cheek. you yelped and jumped back, trying to dodge his chocolate-covered fingers; to no avail. your small food fight lasts for all of 20 minutes, both of you giggling out of breath.

"guess we won't be making cookies today, huh?" mingi's voice was teasing, making you burst out in laughter. "yeah, seems like it. this was more fun than actually baking anyways," you chuckled while wiping some of the flour-chocolate mixture off your cheek. mingi stared at you with a radiant smile on his face, making a small blush creep onto your cheeks. "what is it?" you giggled a bit, looking at him with curious eyes. mingi knew that this was his chance.

"can i kiss you?" his voice was soft, barely above a whisper and it took you a second to confirm that you heard him right. your heart was pounding, and you couldn't keep the shy smile from forming on your lips. too shy to answer him verbally you just nodded, stepping a bit closer to him. delicately taking your face into his hands, he looks into your eyes, and he feels his heart swell at the adoration swimming in your pupils. he was such an idiot for waiting this long, but now he finally has you. your eyes flutter shut as he gets closer and you can feel your heart jump when his lips touch yours. his lips taste a bit of chocolate, making the kiss even sweeter than it already was. he looks at you with so much affection when he pulls back and smiles down at you. growing shy under his gaze, you lower your face, eyes set on the floor. his gentle fingers lift up your chin, and before you can react, his lips are on yours again. breaking the kiss, he slings his arms around your waist, noses touching when he gently whispers to you, "i like you, y/n. so much." you blush again, a shy smile on your face as you look up at him. wrapping your arms around his neck, you pull him a bit closer, lips almost touching, "i like you too, mingi.". you press another soft kiss to his lips, and you can feel him smiling, his arms wrapping themselves tighter around you to pull you even closer.

mingi loves sweets, but there is nothing as sweet as your love.

[rixxy8173571m3w1p3]

September Song (2/3)

I’m sorry @kitten-wrath that this took so long, but I do hope you like it. @hoodoo12 @xerxezra thanks for brainstorming with me. Also, Ice Cream Rick belongs @porkchop-ao3. References to the flowers can be found here (The Language Of Flowers) and pizza rolls here (Sick Day)

Also, special thanks go to @her-victori for reading a majority of my fics in a short span of time. You Rock! As well to random anons who leave me sweet words in my ask box.

If you haven't read the first part of this fic then here's the link. (Read Part1 Here)

In this fic the reader tries to be more reserved and mature for Rick, but what will he think?

______

Chapter 2: These Precious Days

The mom and pop ice cream parlor which could be found at the edge of town offered over twenty flavors and twice as many topping options. Rick thought you'd prefer this quiet atmosphere over the crowd that would've surrounded Ice Cream Ricks truck in the Citadel; he was right. Though it really was a shame since Ice Cream Rick was actually pretty nice. After ordering, you two sat by the window with the best view of a lonely backroad and a white GMC truck.

“I-I-I like that you went for the rainbow jimmies.” Rick commented as he popped a mini gummy bear into his mouth.

“Hmm? Yeah, I like the texture.”

Which was true, but it wasn't the whole truth. You loved sprinkles on just about any dessert they could be placed on. They were fun, colorful, and your dad's favorite topping. They reminded you of good times. You continued. “And they're a classic. Wouldn't you agree?”

“I-I do. Would you say that y-your favorite flavor?”

Savoring the flavor of your chocolate ice cream, you nodded. “Yeah.”

Smiling softly, he seemed to be ruminating on this information, before storing it away and eating a spoonful of his pistachio ice cream. After a little while, he managed to get a bit of it on the side of his mouth, which made you giggle. And because old habits die hard, you picked up a napkin and wiped his face clean. Under your fingertips, his skin had that masculine roughness that came from constant shaving. Of course, you were familiar with it, but these slight reminders that came about by chance never failed to amaze you.

However, you were quick to pull your hand back because he wasn't a fan of public displays of affection, though it seemed to have the opposite effect, with him reaching out and placing your hand back on his cheek, and leaning into it. “I'm glad y-you were able to come with me today.”

Seeing as the shop owner was in the back room, you relaxed a little. “I am too.”

Rick was always a little funny when he got sentimental, which was why it didn't surprise you too much when his eyes bore through you as he said. “Me encanta estar c-contigo.”

“Rick,” you began, wanting to let this facade go and declare every single word of affection your heart felt inclined to say, but just as soon as you thought you were going to crack, you restrained yourself, and simply said. “your ice cream is going to melt.”

Several beats of silence passed, and he acknowledged what you had said, but he went on. “You - I-I sometimes wish I could carry you in my pocket, and have you look after me all the time, but th-that's silly isn't it? It's not realistic, and that w-would be selfish.”

“If it's you, then I don't think it is. While it wouldn't necessarily be practical to miniaturize me and carry me around, isn't the beauty of a relationship knowing that you're always on someone's mind and that they are out there somewhere caring and thinking about you?”

“Certainly, but what I-I meant to say is that it'd be nice if this was our life. If I could keep y-you and if you and me ugh - all th-the time…we - if we….” he faltered, fixing his eyes on something else in the room.

“You don't mean eating ice cream do you?”

With a sigh, he relinquished the hold he had on your hand, “N-no.” and continued to eat his ice cream; resigned, and slightly embarrassed. You couldn't help but feel a slight disappointment. It's not like he wanted to say the magic words. Right?

________

After ice cream, you two visited the bookstore on the corner of Kinder St and Lavue Ave; which had not only a coffee shop but a toy store connected to it. As soon as one entered into it, you were met with the latest best sellers, books on travel and wellness, as well as souvenirs; it was one of few places that didn't bother you if it was cramped. To your left next to the window were those mint boxes which said Adventure Awaits, and it filled you with gladness as picked one up; thinking of little things you'd put in it after all the mints were gone. For his part, Zeta-7 seemed to know exactly what he was going for, disappearing in the back where all the used books were. Not knowing whether to follow or look around, you just did as you pleased.

Past the Keychain holder, above the box of mini hands, you found a Mister Rogers mug. You loved that wholesome old man who used to teach lessons and play with puppets on PBS; Rick reminded you of him too. On the label, it said that when you added hot water to the mug, Mister Rogers would change from a suit jacket into his cardigan. Seeing as Zeta-7 hadn't returned yet, you decided to buy it and continued to look around until he soon returned with an older book in hand. “I-I-I hope I hadn't kept you waiting long.”

Facing the bookshelf, pulling out books that you were mildly interested in, you answered. “I knew you would show up eventually.”

Noticing the stack of books you had, he asked sweetly. “M-m-mi corazón, do you want me t-to hold those books for you? They look a-a little heavy.”

You weren't sure how long you could keep up this facade of being mature and not melting into a puddle everytime he said things like that, with him being as darling as he was. Nonetheless, you nodded and he lightened the burden on your arms.

“Wow,” he brightened. “I-I didn't know you liked Alexandre Dumas.” And picking out another book, he wondered. “Have y-you ever read this?”

“The Man In the Iron Mask? No,” you admitted sadly. “but when I was in high school I did read about a third of The Count of Monte Cristo. I even have a postcard that my old English teacher sent me from Europe that had a picture of one of the buildings that was used in the movie.”

“That's s-s-so cool. Do - do you enjoy classic literature?”

Wholeheartedly, you replied. “Isn't it the best kind?”

“I-I-I don't know,” he softened. “but I don't know what I'd do without them.”

You thought of his home library then, with its eclectic mixture of languages, colors, and topics, and it made you feel warm in your soul. “If your home library tells me anything, it's that you have a healthy appetite for books.”

He glanced at your lips after you said this, but made no attempt to follow whatever thought which might've come to mind. Instead, you two carried on a lengthy discussion on books, how many were a social commentary of the time period, and how they influenced the world you lived in. For once you didn't have to pretend you knew something you didn't, cause you did know. Quite intimately in fact. And within the small spaces between shelves and bodies, where you'd normally feel claustrophobic, you were safe amongst all the friends you had yet to meet amongst the pages, and with Zeta-7 whose warm words and tall body shielded you from the curious eyes of the cashier.

_______________

A stack of books sat quietly in the back seat of his car. Crickets chirped, and there were random feral cats here and there, but there was only you and him as far as you were concerned. September Song by Willie Nelson played on the car radio as he led you into a natural waltz next to the town lake, and moonlight reflected in his eyes. If you hadn't been so afraid of drowning, maybe you would've preferred to dance on the dock, but like this, it felt right.

Oh, it's a long long while

From May to December

But the days grow short

When you reach September

When the autumn weather

Turns leaves to flame

One hasn't got time

For the waiting game

With your head resting on his chest, he hummed along to the melody. More than once you heard a sniffle but assumed it was just Zeta-7 caught up in the moment again.

Oh the days dwindle down

To a precious few. ..

September, November. ..

And these few precious days

I'll spend with you.

These precious days

I'll spend with you.

You thought every day spent with him was precious, and you had to admit that you weren't sure at the beginning of your relationship if it would've worked out, but you were glad that the both of you took a chance, and had been pleasantly surprised ever since. And after all this time, now that it was the fall again, you wondered what the next year and the year after that would be like; the possibilities are endless. However, your train of thought was broken when Zeta-7 stopped dancing and stood there; covering his face, wanting to disappear.

“Rick?”

“I'm - I'm sorry, but I-I-I-I can't do this.”

“Can't do what?”

“I-I-I can't pretend that everything's o-okay. Something's th-the matter isn't it?”

“No there isn't.” you denied.

“Then why are y-y-you so quiet? Are w-we breaking up? Are you - are you leaving me?”

You literally wanted to smack yourself for being such an idiot. “No! Why would you think that?”

Using his phone, he paused the music and passed a hand through his hair in an attempt to calm himself. “Y-y-you haven't been yourself all evening. I thought for a moment that maybe th-things were alright back in the bookstore, but you - I know y-you were holding back. I know how much you love books, and writing is y-y-y-your passion, but you were hesitant in sharing your opinions on either subject. M-mi corazón,” he pleaded, the lines about his forehead and mouth deepening. “please b-be honest with me. Is this it?”

“No, it's not.”

Your plan, which you thought has been working went horribly wrong. So much for trying to act like an adult for once. Man, you only wanted to entice him, which you somewhat succeeded, but because of your stupid games, you'd led him to believe that you were unsatisfied with your relationship. If anything, you were unsatisfied with how you handled this. “Believe me Ricky, you haven't done anything wrong. In fact,” you sighed, your chest aching from the bloom of anxiety. “you've only been sweet and charming. But I….oh, I was only trying to impress you.”

“Huh? Wh-what?”

“Exactly. Whatever I thought I'd accomplish, it…..I only managed to mess it up. Again. You probably wouldn't get it,” Or maybe he would, but you weren't feeling like yourself. “but sometimes I feel like all you did was pull me out of my little bubble so I could wreak havoc. I'm not any different from hundreds of other versions of me, am I? Cause, if I'm like them, then how did I end up with you? How did I get so lucky to be with someone so wonderful? I hope they are happy because I am with you.”

With a hand pressed over his heart, a single tear made its way down his cheek. “M-me too. I'm so happy with you.”

“Somehow, despite all my inadequacies, you want me. I mean, is it stupid to believe that I just wanted to be different from all those other copies? That I just wanted you to think I was mature?”

Zeta-7 looked at you with a wistful hope in his eyes.“No, it's - it's not stupid. You - you did that f-for me?”

“Who else dear honey man of mine? Maybe it can't be helped and I'll just be what I am,” you confessed. “but for a moment I wanted to be different. So I gave myself the look and didn't overreact. And most of all, kept my mouth shut so you wouldn't get bored of my rambling. I know I talk too much.”

“N-no, that's not - have I led you t-to believe you weren't good enough?”

“Not on purpose, but I can't help but feel that way sometimes. We both know I'm not that special. I mean, the only impressive thing I've ever done is eat 37 pizza rolls, and not kill the flowers you gave me. I'm so sorry,” you cried, “I'm sorry you got stuck with an idiot.”

He pulled you in for a tight embrace, smoothing out your hair. “D-don't ever say that.” he cooed. “You're - you're clever, lovely, and always give me something t-t-to smile about.”

“Anyone can do that.”

Pulling back a little, he gave your shoulder a squeeze and softened. “N-no, not at all. Y-you give away dreams, smiles, and kindness. You're reliable, and I-I can trust you. And there is no one in the universe th-that could compare t-to you when it comes to being the perfect woman. If anything, I'm th-the defect here.”

“No, you're perfect Ricky.”

Placing a lock of hair behind your ear, he continued. “I'm glad y-you think so, but this isn't a-about me. You - you dressed up today, in a-a elegant dress that I'd n-never seen before,” and pressing a kiss behind your ear, he whispered with a little gleam of pride in his eyes.. “wearing the perfume I-I-I made you. Smelling like a-a dream.”

Again, how anyone considered this charmer a doofus you'd never know. “I had been saving it for a special occasion.”

“Everyday with you is - is special.”

“Oh Rick. That's…thank you.”

Pointing at your feet, “And I noticed that you're closer t-t-to my height today, but your feet must be hurting by now. Would y-you like to take them off?”

Oh, your feet were screaming. And now that you weren't pretending, you slipped out of your shoes which made you lose about four inches. Picking up your shoes and shoes and dusting them off, he continued. “That must feel better. I-I-I had to wear heels for a case once. It ugh - it's not practical when y-y-you have to run.”

“Right? I don't see how other women do it, cause I can't. I'm not even sure why I own them. I should just burn those things.”

You'd say it was half relief, half joy that made him laugh wholeheartedly at this, and you didn't see how it could be so funny. You poked him and pouted, and he delighted in this. “See?” he chuckled, looking at you in that funny way he did from time to time.

“See what?”

“This. This is th-the girl I fell in love with,” he stated matter of factly. “the one who likes t-to be comfortable, speaks her mind and prefers those jeans with th-the rip on the side. Not to mention those graphic t-shirts. Or cute pj's.”

Your breath caught a little at this confession. How could the smartest man in the universe adore an impertinent person like you? Maybe the same way you could love the smartest man; you just do. In your girlish voice, you said. “I only wanted you to be proud of me.”

Holding you a fraction tighter, he pressed a light kiss to your temple and chuckled sweetly. “Y-you already do princess. Today y-you made an effort for me, and that's impressive, but honestly, I want you t-t-to be comfortable and dress up how y-you like. You as yourself is what impresses me, because you have s-s-so much spirit, and I - that's what makes y-you gorgeous.”

This time you didn't even try to hide your blush.

“Oh Rick, hearing you say that really does make me feel silly. Why did I do this to myself? What was I thinking?”

“I believe y-you're still trying to figure it all out like the rest of us, and I can't get mad at you for th-that because you're wonderfully human. You had good intentions, and th-that's what counts.”

“Can you forgive me?”

“I al-already have.”

TBC

[ilovekoalasforever20]

June 13, 2017 Boys?

Today i would like to talk about a few of my exes that meant the most to me and impacted my life greatly but i will be going over the amazing times and the not so great times. Since I only have one follower these are things I would like to express. Lets start with Josh my first love we met at camp when we were young and I thought at the time that he was attractive and I only saw him for a few weeks before he left for the summer. The following year I didn't see him at camp. Then I began 6th grade and he was in my health class but i no longer thought he was cute. We became really close friends and he began to have a crush on me and he would be adorable always running around to please me. But i went for the bad boys and didn't think about giving him a chance. The following year was one of those years where we all went through that suicidal phase and honestly i am a very drama filled person and well i might've taken the dramatic route. I was still looking for the bad boys and negative friends because they seemed like they were having fun and i loved feeling the thrill of doing dangerous things, but at the time those things didn't help. But eventually i dated him and it was the best we went for our first date which was the movies because it breaks the awkwardness. We went to see Ride Along and it was fun and from there we hung out so much and my mom absolutely loved him and then... it went down hill and one of my “friends” had a crush on him and he started being distant when i was going through my suicidal stage. And we broke up i was just getting out of the hospital when it happened and i was so utterly heart-broken. And let me tell you this relationship was before i was exposed to all this sexual stuff. 

        So i then passed time by “dating” other boys and did other sexual things it was a bad phase that i am still unfortunately going through but i will talk about that another day (don’t worry we will cover everything that goes on in my mind and life currently and in the past.) I had to move my school the following year due to being around negative people and failing in most of my subjects. Its a christian school with very few people, there are about  200 kinds from grades Preschool to 12th grade. Yeah i know small but  have adapted to it somewhat as much as i can i guess. My first year was kind of scar because everyone had there clique and i didn't want to disrupted that. But i wasn't fully “over “ josh until my freshmen year because i met someone new His name was Axel and he was so kind . He had the biggest heart well up to an extent. We used to go to church and i would do many tings but since being a good girl didn't work out with josh i guess i wanted to try a different style and get a little slutty so i did and we lasted almost a year and it was a crazy fucking year filled with crazy amounts of ups and downs. At my school there is a six inch rule but does anyone actually follow that rule? Not really and so we were part of that percent that didn't and we ended up getting talked to multiple times. One day i was worried because he didn't sow up for school and he always did and if by any chance he didn't he would inform me. I ended up getting a hold of him through my friends phone. My school also doesn't allow phones at school because of possible cheating. I snuck it though and i did a great job until gym when a little girl told on me about it and trust me i will never forgive that. Shortly after that we started to have complications with everything and we finally ended it. And even after we ended it we always came back to each other but not that time. I was yet again heart broken and it only got worse because we went from talking everyday about everything to talking to each other casually. Months later i heard that he was talking shit behind my back and making up some of t as well and i thought to myself after all the times crying over him that it was time to stop being a pussy and grow up. SO i did i went to school everyday with a (fake) smile on my face and acted like i was okay until i finally was and the whole time i did that i always caught him staring at me and with such a sorrow face. Funny i know. Now we are causal and we look at each other once and a while but definitely nothing further. 

          About two moths after that his best friend Enrique came out of nowhere and texted me asking if i am okay. We just started talking and started to like each other. We went on a date to the mall and we just hit it off. Axel was unaware of it at first until we ran into a few of kids from his church and we knew it was time to tell him and we did. He had no problem at first until i went to school and started getting picked on even more then before getting called a whore and all this shit came crumbling on me. And i don’t like dealing with this bullshit so i didn't i put whatever i was feeling away and moved on. And i was grateful at the time because i just had fun going to Enrique’s house and playing games cuddling. It was amazing. What people don’t know at least i hope not its that me and Enrique got involved deeply which only made it better. He made me feel happy like everything was worth living. And that lasted about two months. Because tings went bad again and i made a poor decision and went to my exes Josh's house party and ended up not only kissing him but sleeping over and almost sleeping together. But i was smart and didn't take it that far. What god thing happened was josh confessed that he never fully got over me and he likes me again and mind you we ended things 3 years ago and that’s why i did what i did and kissed him because he was my first love and i couldn't miss a chance again with loosing him. I feel like complete shit because i wanted things to work between me and Enrique. But it just doesn't work that way i guess. And that’s where i stand with boys single alone and  a whore. I blame myself completely and wish i could go back and fix all of this with the knowledge  know now...