#once again replaying the god of war games

[thisantithesis]

it’s absolutely sickening how they started off god of war ragnarok with a cinematic of kratos taking a moment for himself to mourn faye. like he’s been mourning her since the moment she died, all throughout his and atreus’ journey to jotunheim to spread her ashes, and still through the winters of fimbulwinter, but he most likely never really got many moments to grieve her by himself. and just the sight of him alone in that cave as he waits for atreus to come back, holding the pouch in which he carried her ashes, softly rubbing his thumb over it as he tries to just let himself breathe, is another level of heartbreaking

[seeker-ophelia]

Ophelia’s Review, Part Three: The Lore

Man. Thank you to @senseandaccountability ’s post for sparking this brainwyrm because I was at a loss for words on how to start this post, and I could not put my finger on what was actually bothering me.

Again, let me just say, emotionally, this game wrecked me. I enjoyed it. I (am probably one of the few who) liked the combat. I liked the companions (basic as they are). And I liked the story. I liked the locations. I liked the quests and the loot system and the companion banter. But.

The Lore.

[Part 1:Emotion]   [Part 2:The Dragon Age System]

If you’ve read my Part 2 Review, you know the end of it is actually its own little fic-let on the Veilguard realizing the veil needs to come down.

And I’m just going to straight up copy a paragraph from @SenseAndAccountability ‘s post (I strongly recommend you go read it, its fantastic).

Replaying really emphasizes how incredibly little the game convinces me of its original main quest - to prevent Solas from doing his ritual. This is a problem as a long-term player because for three games we’ve had build up for a great crescendo tackling the overarching themes of the (restrictions and oppression of) magic, of tears in the Veil, of religious tyranny and oppression based on myths about the Black City and the temptations of flawed humans, we’ve seen and deconstructed the elves quite a bit, we got started on the dwarves and in DAI your Inquisitor can openly ask Solas if it wouldn’t be better if the Veil came down because then spirits wouldn’t be separated from the living and risk becoming demons. Cole, whose function is to reflect the plot, talks endlessly about the old songs wanting to be sung again, about how it hurts to be cut off from part of yourself, how the templars feel it, how the mages feel it, how the elves and the dwarves feel it. The Veil as a prerequisite for life has been deconstructed, the Fade demystified, the gods have mostly fallen. The Veil as an actual wound inflicted on this earth has been presented as a theory and not been convincingly rejected by the narrative. 

Let’s recap, just a little bit.

In Origins, we are introduced to the Dragon Age World. Its politics, its magic physics, the races, and its religion. We are introduced to the concept of the Chantry and the Templars and the Circles (*wiggles my eyebrows at you). We learn about demon possession, and about spirits in the fade. And maybe most importantly, we are introduced to the concept of The Blight.

The unstoppable, indiscriminate zombie-plague that sweeps Thedas once a century or so. And maybe more importantly, thanks to the sacrifice of the Grey Wardens, how to stop it.

In 2, the Thedas lore is even subtler. We were introduced to Dalish Gods in Origins, but because of Merrill we get a little more. We start to become curious about the Gods of the race that has been subjugated and enslaved throughout the common Ages. We learn the tense political atmosphere surrounding the Templars and the Mages, and the Chantry’s weakening hold on the politics and structure of Southern Thedas as a whole. We learn about slavery in the north, about the basics of the Qunari, and we have a Terrorist (potentially our lover), hit the religious organization in our city.

In Inquisition, we learn all about the magic. We learn about the fade, about the veil, we learn all about the Elvhen. We pick a side in the Mage/Templar war, we learn about this strange process of Tranquility, the only power templars have to control mages (thanks to Cassandra), and we also learn what that control costs (thanks to Cullen).

And because of Solas, and Cole, we learn about spirits. About how the Veil turns them to demons on their passing into the real world. About how all they want is to stay true to their purpose. They are simple, pure things, and while there are demons, of course, its not all bad in the fade as maybe we might have believed before. After all, Solavellan’s first kiss happens in the fade.

In Descent, we learn about titans, about memories, about songs, about lyrium, about isatunoll.

In Trespasser we learn about why the Titans even matter. Orbs. Power. Greed. The creation of the Veil, and what it really means.

*Insert Kronk Oh-Yeah-Its-All-Coming-Together.gif*

We had 10 years to scheme. 10 years for theories. 10 years to datamine.

So what did we learn in Veilguard?

Well, in the grand scheme of things, nothing.

We have theories confirmed. Which Evanuris hat belongs to who, how the blight was created, how the blight is spread, and how the blight is controlled (kinda-not-really). At least, we learn how the Evanuris are doing it.

What did we learn that was NEW?

We learned about the Morn Watch (but I mean, did we really?) Emmerich has a good relationship with wisps and spirits. We learn about his distinction between a spirit and a soul.

We learned *a little* more about Qunari culture.

We learned it was a blood magic ritual that was holding the veil up, tied to the life force of the Evanuris, now tied to Solas.

We learned about the Evanuris’ Dragon-Thralls and the strong connection between the two, a connection strong enough to get their souls out of Solas’ Fade Jail.

We learned that the Evanuris could not only control The Blight, but had relics to give to others (the Venatori) to control blighted things. We learned their greed for power was so vast, so consuming, they were willing to Blight the world to achieve it.

But we fought an archdemon, in Origins and in Veilguard. We see and know the terror and horror of the Blight.

This makes any action Solas commits understandable, and even necessary. Would we have done anything different? If my leaders were bent on blighting the world, wouldn’t I go to extreme lengths to stop them? Compromising my own morals, dignity, and values to do so?

I think I would.

Having such a terrible evil, having such an indiscriminately bad thing, The Blight, leaves absolutely no room for nuance. No room for complexity. Just good versus bad. Destroy the bad thing at all costs.

So we do. Wham, bam, Evanuris dead.

And the only thing stopping us from tearing down the Veil, is the Blight.

Because Solas tells us that the Blight is in there too.

But, he made a new Prison for the Evanuris, one without a veil, before Rook & Co. interrupted his ritual. Why can’t we move the blight into there and still tear down the Veil?

What is stopping us at this point?

Solas says: Thousands would die

(You’re trapped in your regrets)

This is why you had to use me to escape the prison. It’s made from regrets. And you’re trapped in yours.

You cannot understand -  

Destroying everything won’t erase your mistakes.

You have a chance right now to save the world. Bind yourself to the Veil and stop it from falling.

2. (Do this the right way)

You’re right, you do need to make up for the damage you’ve done, but breaking the world again is the wrong way to do it.

Letting the veil collapse –

Is what YOU want. Making amends isn’t about what YOU want.

You have a chance right now to save the world. Bind yourself to the Veil and stop it from falling.

3. (This won’t help anyone)

Who does this help? A lot of people are going to die… So you can fix something they don’t even see as wrong.

It is not just people, spirits –

Will be destroyed when you do this, too. Won’t they?

You have a chance right now to save the world. Bind yourself to the Veil and stop it from falling.

Listen. I can't believe I'm about to say this, but there's more to Dragon Age than Solavellan.

This, in the end, was an emotional decision. The decision to leave the veil up was tied to emotion, and not logic.

So, what does all this mean?

Well, for players new to the series, nothing. They were always fighting for the Veil to stay up. The opposite of what the antagonist wants, pretty much. Easy enough to follow along.

But for returning players? Lavellans who stood in Fade-Haven? Players who walked Vir Dirthara? Mages who made the Descent, and saw how horrible it was for the dwarves to be sundered from their dreams, and made the horrifying connection that the Veil did the same to them?

Trespasser Solas: You must understand, I awoke in a world where the Veil had blocked most people’s conscious connection to the Fade. It was like walking through a world of Tranquil. (We aren’t even people to you?) Not at first. You showed me that I was wrong… again. That does not make what must come next any easier.

When I learned about the rite of Tranquility in Origins, I was disgusted. The first thing that popped into my head was lobotomization. They are one and the same to me. Turning a person into a husk of what they were. Separating them from their emotions. From hard emotions, yes, from things that are not easy, even painful, but at the cost of themselves.

We walk with Harding through her decision to, although the Titans are angry, and what was taken from her people was great, not reunite Titan and Dwarf because…

Lace: The story of their end is the story of our beginning.

Mythal releases Solas from his journey to reunite Elvhen with the Fade.

Harding releases angry Titans from their quest to reunite with the Dwarvhen.

And so the Veil stays up. The Titans stay sundered.

But… at what cost?

Lest we forget, it was the sundering of the Titans from the Dwarves that CREATED THE BLIGHT. The Titans created the blight as a weapon to infect the Elvhen as punishment for their death, their tranquility.

This Tranquility Ritual, be it in the form of keeping Mages from the fade, be it of Titans or of Elvhen, is WRONG.

I’m a Blue-Collar Journeyman, and we have a turn of phrase we use with old fellers who don’t want to change the way they do things.

Just because you’ve been doing something for a long time, doesn’t mean you’ve been doing it right.

You can do something for years, and still be doing it wrong.

And both Lace and Rook decide that this is the way things have been done, for AGES. We’re not going to change now.

And I’m just… Solas. As John Travolta playing Vincent Vega in Pulp Fiction, confusingly standing there, looking around with my arms out.

Did we learn nothing from the Lessons of Origins? Nothing from the Lessons of Inquisition?

Maintain the Status Quo? That’s the answer?

At what cost?

One of my favourite lines in in my Part 2 Post is this;

Veilguard, is shallow. The essence is there, beneath it's Veil, pressing and bursting at the seams to escape, but is being held back by a gentrification of Thedas.

This decision, the decision to keep the veil up, is shallow. Its basic. Its Easy. It is pre-masticated, lunchable drivel. It was spoon fed to us in easy dialogue and groupthink.

What about every other thing we learned in the other games of Dragon Age?

If Weekes et al. want me to forget about how horrible the Rite of Tranquility is, they’re going to have to come out with a hell of a companion novel between now and DA5, because this makes no sense to me.

I ask you. If sundering Titans created The Blight, what did sundering the Fade create?

Or should I say,

If separating Dwarvhen from their Memories created the Blight (out of Titan anger),

What did separating Elvhen from the Fade create?????

Lets talk about Ser Dave.

If you read my part 2, you’ll know that Ser Dave is my name for the ‘?????’

Not only is it so insulting to my intelligence to call something ‘?????,’ because of course then I’m going to pay more attention to it, but its so lazy. Let it introduce itself to Rook and say “call me the wicked witch of the west,’ ‘a concerned party,’ ‘I am the Batman,’ ‘I am No One,’ ‘I am Daivd Gaider,’ ffs.

An I excited at a new villain? Yes. Am I happy to learn there was a shadow organization pulling the strings behind all of my villains throughout The Dragon Age? Abso-fucking-lutely not. Am I happy Southern Thedas, Treviso, and Minrathous are essentially razed after the rise of the Evanuris? No.

Nothing we did in any of our previous games mattered. Nothing I did mattered. Ser Dave was there the whole time, controlling, balancing, guiding, whispering.

I was doomed to fail from the start.

The moral of the story in Veilguard is to not assume the burden of others actions:

And yet its Ser Dave and the Nazgul Band that assumes responsibility for my villains?

What in the Actual Fuck?

So what is going to happen in 5? I don't know. Will I find true agency? How do we have a villain worse than a God? How do we live in a Tranquil’d world, knowing the alternative? How do you bring back the dark, heavy, realness of Thedas, after the gentrification of Veilguard? After blanding Thedas, making it easier for more palates, needing to feed the EA Machine.

For the record, I have yet to complete my second playthrough. I have yet to find all the codices. I have yet to get all the companion banter. I have yet to play as every race. I have yet to make every decision. And if Inquisition taught me anything, its how one little piece of information can change everything. So, for the record, this whole post could be wrong.

In fact, I hope, and pray, that I am missing a big piece of something in Veilguard. That I just haven’t found it yet. That one little thing that’s going to shift my worldview. And I’m going to play until I find it.

Because these messages Veilguard is sending? They’re too contradictory. Too opposite to be coincidence. Too Different to simply be Bad Writing™. I said that Veilguard is a Tranquilized Version of what DA4 could have been. Inquisition, 2, and Origins, were too deep, for Veilguard to be this shallow.

And… Maybe its copium, but I’m kind of hoping that it was on purpose.

[americankimchi]

dragon age veilguard review: spoilers for the entire game ahead

alright now that it's been a few days and i've had time to 1) get over the honeymoon phase and 2) really think on the game beyond the emotional high of the endgame mission/endgame choice, i can finally type this up

my final score for this game is 8/10, if you just care about that part and wanna skip the rest.

preface, i've only finished one playthrough as an elf mage grey warden, and played every companion/region quest*/side objective to completion**.

i played it on the underdog difficulty and it took me ~74 hours (i left the game open and went to do something else a few times, so it should probably read closer to ~70). this is a screenshot of the final auto-save after i beat the game

veeery long review under the cut ✌️

*exception being minrathous since i picked treviso instead, so the region quests got shafted

**didn't find all the chests or all the collectables, but i got close. also, i missed neve's first companion outing because i forgot to do it prior to the minrathous/treviso choice and didn't realize recruiting davrin was a cut-off point. aside from that i finished every quest i could grab my hands on.

OKAY SO i want to start this off by saying that i thoroughly enjoyed this game, enough to want to replay it again (i currently have two concurrent playthroughs as a dwarf shadow dragon and a human antivan crow going) and will probably be modding it to high heavens once that boat gets sailing, and that i believe it deserves that 8/10 score with all my heart. it was a great time.

that being said.

DIALOGUE REACTIVITY BASED OFF CHARACTER CREATION:

anyone who plays dragon age veilguard and only veilguard is getting a very surface level experience of what thedas is/has to offer culturally. i'm saying this because the excuse being "this is tevinter, why would it be the same as the southern half of thedas" isn't enough to explain a lot of gaping holes in the game's setting.

for instance, i played as an ELF MAGE GREY WARDEN in the middle of TEVINTER during a massive catastrophe brought about by the returned "ELVEN GODS"

having played all the games prior to dav, i did so because i knew that there would be

high tension with my PC being an elf in the notoriously cruel-to-elves country of tevinter, the old empire of which caused the fall of arlathan, and who enslaves elves to the point of it being a huge story beat for a previous companion (fenris)

a mage in a magocracy, where the script is flipped between mages and templars as compared to the south which recently went through years of a mage-templar war

a grey warden - their relevancy in thedas ended around 10 years ago due to corypheus basically tricking them all into hearing their calling, and 22 years prior veilguard during the fifth blight. at the beginning of the game, being a grey warden is more of a coincidental occupation than a narrative beat like it is in origins, but there's always something going on with the wardens so i picked it as a 'i'll pick this to experience the game first and then go for what i suspect is the best narratively relevant origin for my second playthrough' option

of the three descriptors, ELF/MAGE/GREY WARDEN, which do you think had the most story-relevant screen time?

that's right.

the grey warden one.

i won't say that there was nothing about being a mage, but i can remember probably on one hand where the option to chime in as a mage was relevant to what was being spoken about. (a conversation about spite, a conversation about scout harding's new abilities, and if there were more they weren't memorable enough for me to recall off the top of my head) which was fine on paper if you don't know anything about dragon age's entire deal wrt mages. i believe the only real mention about tensions between mages and templars happened in minrathous when we met up with neve's templar friend rana. i think the line reads something like "oh templars are just here to make sure the magic doesn't go out of hand. we don't even take lyrium like our southern counterparts" and then the game moves on to other things

which is crazy considering just how seriously the mage vs templar conflict was being leaned into for the previous three games, enough to the point where i was getting absolutely sick and tired of hearing about it. well the monkey's paw curls a finger because not only did i not hear about it, it felt like it never even happened.

TO BE FAIR: we're playing in tevinter (and antiva. and rivain. and the hossberg wetlands. and—well, you get the idea) and there's a general air of tevinter snooty superiority when they consider the 'south', so perhaps it wasn't fair for me to think "oh, they'd talk about it right? they'd bring it up more than once", but my being a mage seemed to just not even register for any characters in tevinter. not that i wanted them to roll out the red carpet or anything, but i can't remember a single moment where an NPC was like "oh right, you're a mage too". maybe they did, and i just don't remember it. but it didn't seem to matter at all.

but alright whatever, if we want to write that off as being "we're in tevinter. that has no bearing on circumstances here because it's a MAGOCRACY" fine i'll let it slide.

but the fact that my being an ELF didn't seem to be a Huge Deal when in tevinter threw me for a fucking loop. was there some sort of massive societal upheaval in the ten years between dragon age inquisition (dorian: i thought keeping slaves was fine as long as you treat them well) to veilguard (i found a single codex entry of a letter where dorian says "hey guys. we should stop keeping slaves. like genuinely what the fuck is wrong with us for even doing that in the first place") but the fact that NOBODY SEEMS TO BLINK AN EYE at my rook's elven heritage. ESPECIALLY since the main antagonists of this game are ALL ELVEN GODS seems like a wildly missed opportunity to introduce some tension. UNJUSTIFIED TENSION, but tension nonetheless.

the wardens had a lot of content, which both surprised and delighted me thoroughly. i'll never speak a word against them of course, and i did love how it showed that the wardens were here to do a job, and not play nice about it. the first warden was, in my humble opinion, one of the best characters in the entire game. annoying, gruff, called my rook warden basically the equivalent of a stupid rhino in a china shop not knowing what's best for the wardens/their oaths and impulsive in a way detrimental to everyone in his surroundings. literally one of my favorite lines happens when he and rook are beefing in the middle of the cobbled swan:

like. that was so satisfying.

the fact that the first warden isn't a villain, he's actually a fantastic grey warden. he'd sacrifice himself to kill an archdemon, and in fact "steals the glory" for himself. like was he an asshole during that exchange? yes, but it's undeniable that he was going to his death voluntarily and with a grim fervor. that's peak grey warden. nobody can say he'd ever shirk his duty. his character flaw was that he's a terrible leader, has the military tactics of a damp slice of toast, and generally doesn't inspire his subordinates to feel any sort of true loyalty to him. see here where my rook aggressively relieves him of duty and after a tense exchange where it seems like combat is about to start, evka saves the day by taking charge. and she does take charge pretty quick. nobody seems to really oppose the real quick promotion.

and then it's back to business as usual. archdemon trapping, anyone?

which was a problem i had with other factions in the game, namely the antivan crows. like yes, not every group is a monolith sharing the same ideals/morals/etc. but having played dragon age origins close to two decades prior where a massive point of contention was between zevran and the crows and the trauma that came from his upbringing as a crow... to then get thrown into treviso to see that the house we're dealing with is a bunch of leathery robin hoods was an unexpected turn. like. guys? weren't they villains? why are we all relatively good people (barring illario) here??? if anything, i thought that there'd be more politicking and backstabbing (literally and figuratively) but everything here seems kinda...... harmonious in comparison to whatever the fuck house arainai was doing. i might have missed a codex entry (i didn't read them all) explaining why the tonal shift happened, like maybe someone somewhere wrote about how house arainai imploded post-fifth blight when a crow went, well, rogue, and exposed the crows for the literal torture they put CHILDREN through, but nothing. like the game straight up lets an NPC whose name escapes me form a new house composed OF children at the end. like. what........ this isn't neverland, why are we forming the lost boys with knives here. hello??

on the other hand, i feel like the wardens had more options to expand on the fact that uh. yeah. grey wardens don't come from great backgrounds. like when you could conscript the mayor of d'meta's crossing much to everyone's displeasure, or the first warden actively being an obstacle to real progress (but not a villain! just extremely blind to the real dangers!), etc. etc. still not great in terms of "we employ literal murderers and criminals of every kind so we can toss them in the direction of darkspawn as a literal meat shield for thedas" but at least it's something.

but i digress. back to the point:

felt like the amount of dialogue options i had where i could bring up my warden expertise not only outstripped the mage/elf tags, but was so prevalent that sometimes it felt like the game was specifically catered to me being a grey warden. this is obviously just because i haven't played enough of the other origins to really feel out how much content they have in comparison, and it's partially just because of how obviously biased i am towards them as a group, but the FLAVOR of being a grey warden was present wherever i went. we'll see how well this opinion holds up after i finish my other two playthroughs.

THE COMBAT:

genuinely the best combat in the series. the fact that you can dodge-roll and more importantly PARRY in this game is an unexpected boon that i can't praise bioware enough for. the abilities themselves are smooth, the detonations provide a nice chunk of damage AND crowd control where you can just unload, and the damage types/weaknesses being a genuinely relevant part of the game to the point where if you have a lightning abilities/weapons equipped and you're facing down a hoard of antaam, you're going to have an extremely bad time*.

* on higher difficulties. i've heard on lower ones that it doesn't matter and you can just brute force your way through the game

i will say the "quick recovery" doesn't feel quick at all, even if i'm hitting the button for it frame-perfect, i can still get knocked down as the animation for quick recovery is going off, which was annoying. would've liked the i-frames to have saved me from getting turned into paste by the three ogres punching me down at the same time but alas.

also, they tend to target you even if you have a warrior (davrin/taash) on the team. unless you're actively casting taunt, they will run past your party members to hammer down on you. which was. annoying.

STILL I LOVED THE COMBAT, i went spellblade as a mage and my build was absolutely disgusting at the end. with a combination of fully stacked out duration+strike abilities, arcane bomb stacking abilities/weapons, and not even glancing at the other two trees for the majority of the game, i felt like i was a rogue that could conveniently cast chain lightning. it was crazy fun.

but also a steep learning curve. mythal took me 17 entire real life minutes to beat. LMAO.

i love that you don't need to restart the game if you want to play a different subclass, you can just refund your skill points and explore the game to your heart's content that way. not that i did, i picked one tree and stuck to it the entire game come hell or high water (or a lightning resistant high dragon 10 levels above me) and i had a blast with it.

THE STORY (THE EVANURIS, ROOK, & VARRIC):

hooooo boy. okay. this is going to be about the MAIN STORY ONLY, companion and region specific stuff will be in its own section later.

the writing for the main story was actually pretty enjoyable the further along in the game i got. every single main story mission was an incredibly cinematic experience; my favorite being the siege at weisshaupt mission—but only because it's kind of hard to quantify the endgame section as a 'mission' when it felt like an entire act on its own.

the amount of personality rook has was a breath of fresh air, and the voice acting for male british rook (alex jordan, who also coincidentally voices my favorite character in wuthering waves: jiyan♥) was SOOOO good. every line delivered felt like it matched the scene's energy/the personality i picked, so the flow of dialogue felt natural enough to be part of a tv show or movie.

although i do wish there was more option to be a little bit more of a bitch. a little rat bastard. not evil because i don't think dragon age would ever let you be evil in the way owlcat games lets you turn into a literal swarm of bugs consuming all (including companions) in its path, i thought there'd be a chance to be like. well. a little mean to people. i can be rude, but not mean. if that makes sense.

i do feel that rook was done a disservice by not having a hawke-like session 0 where we can see, precisely, why they're already so attached to varric and scout harding, but maybe that was left on the cutting room floor. i'm not a fan of tell don't show, so the game telling me "hey remember when you and varric did this thing that we're not going to actually show you" was pretty annoying. i wasn't expecting a dragon age origins-type prologue segment where i move through the world as a warden pre-veilguard, but i do wish we had like. a short cutscene flashback sequence or something to really immerse myself into the character. like let me put my shoes on before i start running the race!

still though rook felt really present in the story. like they slotted really nicely and smoothly into the leadership position which. i mean yeah who else, right? even though they did have plot armor in the sense that i didn't really understand (in-universe) why ghilan'nain and elgar'nan didn't just squish my rook into a pulp and scrape the dagger off the smear he became every time they came face to face... i suppose we wouldn't have a game, otherwise lolol

moving swiftly on, the boss fights felt appropriately built up to, and never did i feel like i was woefully unprepared for the task set up before me (although i must admit i was slightly taken aback by the three-headed hydra at weisshaupt. delightfully so, but it did stunlock me for a few seconds sjkhfj)

from the prologue -> endgame, i suspected something was off about varric once i realized "hey, how come nobody's talking to him anymore?" while the answer of "varric is actually a manifestation in rook's mind caused by solas trying to mold him into someone who could replace solas in the fade prison he crafted" was admittedly beyond the scope of what i came up with:

1. everyone in this game is a monumental asshole (funny, but disappointing narratively)

or

2. he died but bc he died next to the fade magic + we live in the fade now he's just a ghost only rook can see?? (true, but to the left)

i didn't really consider solas had a hand in it which is funny as hell considering. well. blood magic was mentioned at the very start of the game by solas himself

the reveal was very satisfying, and on my current playthroughs it's very entertaining to see everyone (especially solas, but my companions too) very carefully skirt the subject of varric's death by speaking about it in terms oblique enough that everyone in the know understands it as 'varric is fucking dead' vs. rook's manipulated memories understands it as 'varric is laid up in the infirmary'

the evanuris were very well designed, ghilan'nain being a creepy flesh centipede woman with tentacles and blight covering her head to toe was genuinely one of the most refreshing villain designs i've ever seen. elgar'nan was comparatively boring, but considering his whole deal is to be the elven god of tyranny having him just be a conventionally attractive man was a statement in and of itself.

their boss fights were standard, elgar'nan's being the easier of the two specifically because i wasn't trying to haul my ass through waves of darkspawn, but even ghilan'nain's wasn't that hard either considering all i really needed to to was burst some blight growths and could fully ignore the darkspawn if i wanted to. i had more trouble fighting the demon of desperation in minrathous than i did the story boss fights, but that was a trend for most games i feel. the side objectives containing the optional, harder fights and the mandatory quests softening the blow from the main story bosses so the player can get through them at a steady pace.

i do feel like the majority of the story was well written, but suffered greatly from pacing issues brought about by the format of the game itself. while there was a steady pressure brought about by the urgency needed to stop them from crafting the red lyrium dagger, the fact that i could just wander about the world picking up and completing side quests at my leisure before tackling the broader problem at hand did have me slightly confused about how long the game's time frame really was. i think it takes place over the course of a few months, or maybe a year total? if it was mentioned, it went straight over my head.

though i suppose that's a problem most RPGs have—the risk of allowing the player to have agency in picking what to do next means that. well sometimes they can spend hours trying to pick up every collectible while minrathous burns in the background.

though i did wish there was more dalish presence in a game focusing around the elven gods. like i know the veil jumpers are in the game as a faction but. they don't really feel dalish. they just feel like a bunch of archeologists who happen to be elves. a bit of a disappointment, there. also, they were constantly imperiled by something which really put a damper on the "we are also a competent group of people" vibe that i got from pretty much everyone else. the dalish aesthetic was just that, aesthetic. the veil jumpers being posted up in arlathan forest just seemed like they were there due to their occupation and not their heritage. bellara goes into it a little bit through her quest line, but i don't know. there wasn't that sense of unity and closed ranks the way it felt in da:o and da2. the less we speak of the dalish in da:i the better.

as for solas himself, i'm positive that the way you speak to him reflects his demeanor to you over the course of the game (i picked every aggressive/stoic option i possibly could, and the results i got were extremely entertaining; i have so many recorded videos of rook and solas duking it out but due to size constraints i haven't uploaded them anywhere ajkjdj) but at one point they went from "actively antagonistic" to "actively antagonistic but with begrudging respect"... on the side of solas. my rook was extremely honest about hating him every step of the way. extremely honest.

still, i loved how the game kept track of the progression of their relationship. the way every time a new talk with solas started i'd see a little "yeah last time you kept yelling at each other so we're keeping that energy" popup on the side of my screen. the way rook and solas could constantly. well i don't want to call it 'banter' because at every given point my rook would call him out on his bullshit and solas would strike back with a precise cut deep enough to bleed, watching them snipe at each other so aggressively vs. what i suspect is a much softer and more amicable conversation if you go the more diplomatic route was nice to see.

during endgame, since i completed every side objective (the solas's regrets chain of quests + the mythal encounter/fight) i had the option to:

deceive him by giving him a fake prop of his dagger

convince him to stop (unlockable by doing the aforementioned quest chain)

fuck it we ball; 1v1 me right now you bald bitch

obviously, i threw aside all other options and went for the 1v1. when i say i was HOWLING WITH LAUGHTER watching my rook go "I BEEN WAITING FOR THIS" and throw a haymaker to the face........... /wipes tear. it was beautiful. and then my rook STABBED HIM IN THE GUT, SEALING HIM INTO THE FADE FOREVER??? ten years i waited for this. ten YEARS. HALLELUJAH.

though it is very funny after all those years of seeing posts like "UMMM ACTUALLY THE VEIL SHOULD COME DOWN" and then the game is like "nah. that shit stayin up for a while" like kjHDJKLSHGFJK

anyways. i enjoyed stabbing him and watching him get yoinked into the fade. i'll do the merciful ending eventually but i had to do it to him at least once.👍

THE COMPANIONS:

though obviously i have a few characters who i enjoyed more than the others, i did like all of them!!

taash's questline was very good in terms of the cultural aspect (i can relate to feeling torn between two worlds) but the gender identity was somehow both heartwarming and. extremely awkward. it felt a little bit like watching an intro to gender studies 101 powerpoint presentation. like i suppose it was to explain the concept of being nonbinary to people who've never considered gender beyond what color cake to buy for a baby shower, but it did have me raising an eyebrow a few times. not in a bad way but in a very "this is obviously catered to people who don't know a thing about it, and i appreciate that bc it serves as a nice jumping off point for people to really get to know more, but it is a little clumsy in execution". i think my favorite scene for taash is when they're with neve in the dining room talking about how "nobody REALLY likes being a woman" and neve's just there like. oh. you sweet summer child. JKHDSKLAGHFGJ THAT WAS SO GOOD!! but i think the strongest part of their character arc was them trying to figure out who they are in relation to their cultural identity. especially the bit where they fought with their mom about it alllll the time. like where my second generation kids who don't really relate to their ethnic background at!!!!! RISE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!

the way i had to google if i was first or second gen. apparently it's "first to be natively born in a country = second gen" so i'm going with that

and the scene where they're screaming "TAMAAA" when shathann dies...... bro i teared up. i ain't ashamed about it. that was heartbreaking af.

still uh. it was kinda funny (read: eyebrow raising) that a character whose entire arc is coming to grips with multiculturalism and a break from the gender binary..... ends up being presented with a binary choice on whether or not to pursue their connections to their qunari heritage or their rivaini roots. like uh. guys. guys??? why do we have to pick??? aint the whole point of multiculturalism is that it's. uh. multicultural??? i suppose you could argue that it's the "oh you're just supporting taash into embracing a specific part of their culture, you're not really telling them to abandon the other!" but like. eh. EHHHHHHH. it didn't FEEL like that. esp. when it's presented as an either-or scenario.

THEIR PARTY BANTER WITH LUCANIS WAS THEEEE FUNNIEST SERIES OF LINES. i love those two together omg. and taash + scout harding!!! wagh!!!!

EDIT: i was gonna add a section abt the lords of fortune for taash's segment but forgot. which is very on brand bc they were forgettable at best and invisible at worst throughout the entire game. i don't want to say that they were irrelevant but like. uh. yeah. 💀💀

neve. neve neve neve. has hands down the absolute worst voice acting in the entire game. like i'm sorry to say that every single line was monotonous and genuinely lacking in any real connection to the words being said. i have to wonder if the voice actor for neve isn't used to working in a booth and more on camera, because truly with every line she spoke i became more and more disinterested with the conversation. the concept of a mage detective in the depths of minrathous rooting out corruption sounds so compelling, and it was, but unfortunately any deeper connection i could've forged with neve was hamstrung by the fact that i was bored to tears by the voice acting. even the conflict generated between my rook and neve due to him picking treviso (an obvious choice for a warden. they were going to blight the waterways) fell flat. because the lines were delivered flat. disappointing, considering how interesting the content of the game she features in is. like the sequence where i'm running through run-down ruins with NPCs tethered by their own blood jetting out of their bodies as they function as living speakerphones for a blood mage hell bent on revitalizing minrathous in her own twisted way. that's sick as hell. it WAS sick as hell. i loved every second of that. i just didn't love neve's voice acting. a shame, bc i was really excited about her pre-release. :(

scout harding's questline confused me not because of the content, but because it felt like this should've been a separate game entirely?? like why are we discussing the tranquilized titans and their horrific half-dead, half-dreaming state solely through the lens of a companion quest? why aren't we visiting orzammar or kal-sharok for more than 2 minutes and talking about the fact that the lyrium they've been mining for centuries is the blood of their ancestors?? like it's mentioned once or twice, but only during side-quests. like the solas's regrets quest chain or scout harding's companion quests. like isn't this a huge deal? why are we slotting this into a game about the elven gods?? the reveal that the evanuris essentially genocided the titans in order to craft their own bodies is a tale of horrific violence and violation and we........ just kinda. don't talk about it? after scout harding's quest is over? and the fugliest armor set known to man is unlocked? (toes. why does her armor have TOES.)

i did appreciate the fact that the game let us tell her that her anger was justified bc like. ngl if i learned all that and then the only option presented to me was to forgive the fuckers that did it i think i'd go crazy.

aside from that weirdness, scout harding is bestie. i love her. sorry that i KILLED HER OFF THOUGH!!! WHAT!!! okay unironically though i love that. i love that you can PERMANENTLY kill someone off. it adds depth. it adds STAKES. i wish more people would've died at the end. like bellara just being. fine? after being trapped in blight for who knows how long was baffling as hell. like she's not FINE but she's not dead. crazy stuff. how does being a warden sound bellara. u got a swift career change ahead of u. my rook's a warden tho he'll put in a good word for u dw

SPEAKING OF BELLARA. her questline was sad as hell but also like. how many times am i going to deal with cyrian bro like why couldn't we just knock his ass out. i know for the plot he has to keep going back to his evil masked ghost overlord anaris but like. eh.

his death scene was very sad though. bellara :((

CYRIAN UNMASKED LOWKEY....... KINDA FINE THO..... 👀

same as scout harding's i wish bellara's whole thing had more to do with the dalish. NOT THAT IT WASN'T I MEAN IT WAS ALL ABOUT BEING DALISH but it was more veil jumper than anything. man the veil jumpers were disappointing. just a faction built to fumble at any given chance. the only competent person is bellara and she's on the squad........... whole faction just fell apart without her 💀💀

bellara is my cutie pie bestie babygirl though <33 im so excited to romance her WAUGHHH even if i hate her hairstyle like girl what the hell is that on the back of your head!!!! they had to nerf her otherwise she'd be the Perfect Companion 😔💞

emmrich was sooo sweet. literally just an amiable old man on a journey to help his friends and students and his BONE SON!!!! SKELETON CHILD....... manfred my love......... unfortunately i did honor manfred's noble sacrifice and help emmrich into becoming a lich but like. that shit. feels like it should've been saved for post-game, somehow?? like in the veilguard equivalent of a trespasser or whatever. like what do you mean we just have an immortal lich companion just chillin. just vibin outta the necropolis. is that allowed?? are there other liches outside the necropolis???

???

the drip is immaculate though ngl. he easily clears everyone else's veilguard outfits <-she has only seen half of them due to only having the one finished playthrough

i didn't really use him much outside of his companion quests + fighting undead, so i don't know much about him with regards to party banter. sorry emmrich ;-;

davrin was. oh my goodness. have you ever seen a man so beautiful. the soulful brown eyes. the jawline strong enough to cut diamond. the EXPOSED CHEST. GOOD HEAVENS..... /SWOONS

literally the dreamiest dragon age companion ever like im sorry he clears literally everyone else ever made. and i say that even with zevran existing in the universe. (if silver fox zevran had at any point showed up in this game this opinion would swiftly change.)

i didn't romance him and i regret it bc i feel like there would've been something to the whole brothers in arms -> you and i are the only two people on this team who perfectly understand each other; you and i are dead men walking but we go to our blighted graves with grim smiles and clear eyes; should the calling come for one of us, it will end up claiming two, etc etc—unfortunately you recruit lucanis first and i didn't pivot 🫡

THE ONLY COMPLAINT I HAVE FOR DAVRIN: his entire arc focuses around assan. not JUST assan, like assan is the conduit through which davrin works through a lot of stuff, but it feels like. well i don't think there was a single scene where assan wasn't there. which makes sense because GRIFFONS. MY GOD. THEY'RE BACK. but also. i feel like if davrin had some space from assan in like a single mission/quest/etc. it would've been good. absence making the heart grow fonder and all. like i'd kill and die for assan but like 60% of the way through davrin's arc i was lowkey getting tired of it all being about our favorite bird son.

lucanis.... lucanis lucanis lucanis. he's the one my rook romanced and uh....... i'm gonna be honest. i wasn't really feeling like i was in a romance at all until the very end of the game. there's a line where lucanis was like "that's what i love about you" or whatever and i was like. huh? what? when was this established? i don't think we ever had a conversation or an event that would lead to this conclusion??? did i skip it? did i forget??? taps game is this thing on???

like i'm not saying the romance was BAD. (aside from some questionable animation choices. like why was lucanis standing so close to my rook like BACK UPPPPPP 😭😭)

all of the romance scenes were sweet and enjoyable and full of typical Bioware Cringe Romance Lines™ (affectionate) (honorary) but it did feel a little like. 80% of the game we had tepid to mildly reciprocal reactions to any of rook's flirtatious dialogue choices, and then when i got the choice to lock in the romance for lucanis it's like. OKAY HIT THE GAS, BUDDY! IT'S TIME TO FLOOR IT. 0->100 in an instant. i love a slowburn, but this was less of a slowburn and more me silently watching a mile long fuse burn up for like 60 hours until it thunderously explodes all at once.

unrelated but why does rook not have a bed in his room. why is it just a couch. they were suckin' n' fuckin' on an ancient elven la-z-boy in the fade. amazing stuff.

ASIDE FROM THE WEIRD PACING ISSUES I EXPERIENCED (hopefully it wasn't universal) THE ROMANCE WAS SWEET. 10/10 WOULD RECOMMEND

as for his personal character arc. why the hell did lucanis become first talon??? like speaking as someone who found out post-game that he straight up SAYS in his tevinter nights short story that he doesn't want to be first talon. at no point in the game did i think "yeah this guy is fit for and desires a position of authority" like um. viago is right there. i could see the argument if treviso was blighted (don't know if teia and viago survive that; i saved treviso in my playthrough) but like. VIAGO (AND TEIA!) ARE RIGHT THERE BRO...............

him not killing illario is whatever i can understand not wanting to have the blood of family on your hands. it's the becoming first talon that's crazy. although i suppose the whole filial duty to caterina angle........ but since when was the antivan crow org following the right of primogeniture??? WHATEVERRR

also. antivan crows?? are not a moral organization??? what happened between da:o --> veilguard. why are they all robin hoods. weren't they child slavers who mercilessly tortured them into becoming assassins. there's an argument for "oh that was just house arainai" but i was expecting more morally gray/amoral assassins for hire and less "TREVISO WILL BE FREE. DOWN WITH TYRANNY" like huh???? are we red jennies all of a sudden. are we shadow dragons. whats goin on here.

FINAL THOUGHTS:

wow that's a lot. girl has a phd in yaponomics fr. at the end of the day, veilguard is a good game. i mean, i'm playing again it right now on nightmare mode this time. (CALIVAN'S FIGHT.......... WHAT THE FUCK................ i didn't die to his little minions OR to his pride demon summon i kept dying to his fuckass sextuple cast magic missiles that get spammed constantly like BRO CAN YOU RELAX. CHILL BRO CHIIIIIILLLLLLLLLL IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS!!!!!!!)

i think this game could easily make space for a few more DLC, something like trespasser or mass effect's citadel DLC. hopefully they do because the epilogue slides were PITIFUL. PALTRY. and dare i say? PATHETIC. the romance slide for lucanis and rook being a single line of dialogue that they split between them. i was gobsmacked.

dragon age i say this because i love you and i have loved you for so long and will love you forever: BRING BACK WORLDSTATES. PLEASE. I DON'T NEED A MASSIVE CALLBACK. I DON'T NEED CUTSCENES. I WOULD BE CONTENT WITH THROWAWAY DIALOGUE. WITH A CODEX ENTRY. A LETTER SENT IN-GAME. PLEASE. BRING BACK WORLDSTATES AUGHHHH

although i don't think it'll matter bc if i'm reading those hints right we're going across the sea in the next game to deal with the uh. what was it called? something storm?? that the qunari were running from or whatever???? so i dont think anything we did here in thedas matters. it'll be like me:a except. you know. dragon age.

WAIT. PAUSE. THIS GAME HAS A SECRET ENDING??? <-SHE JUST GOOGLED "DRAGON AGE STORM"

FOR FUCK'S SAKE. WELL THAT'S ON THE TO-DO LIST NEXT THEN.

anyways i love this game. 8/10 would get my ass beat by the demon of desperation and its 5 billion summoned minions again 👍

[chaifootsteps]

Hi Chai,

Since I know you are not a transmisogynist, what are some of your favorite transfem characters or characters you hc as transfem?

Btw this is the Malva anon again, I've been sending asks more than once but I realized I may be a regular asker now lol

GL with Bluesky

*Rubs hands eagerly*. Gladly! Let's talk about some ladies!

Rachel Bighead from Rocko's Modern Life

My friend and I were watching this in VC the other night and Rachel's probably my favorite example of how to "trans" a character, especially one that's been around for a long time, right. Nothing about it feels shoehorned or asspulled or like it was done to appease a board somewhere. Ralph's defining characteristic throughout Rocko's original run was being absolutely miserable all the time, no matter how much success in life he achieved, and so when we learn that he went off soul searching and discovered Rachel was the answer? It made perfect, beautiful sense.

Rachel's just...amazing. She's dry as ever, but unflappably confident. She's Ralph at perfect peace, and the journey we see the Bighead family go on? Bev's immediate acceptance, Ed's tearful epiphany that that little tadpole who damaged his retina is still right in front of him, and the three of them hugging? God, this part of the special was so good. Rachel's so good.

Also, I ship her with Rocko like whoa.

2. Grell Sutcliffe from Black Butler

I freaking love Grell. She's absolutely nuts, has an awesome design and a kickass weapon, and was surprisingly poignant and not-meanspirited considering the time period the show came out in. I love how the English dub has her give a kind of orgasmic bird squawk every time something goes right for her. 10/10, would support every last one of her woman's wrongs.

(Incidentally, Grell's one of the reasons it annoys me when people call me transmysogynist based off my opinions on Arcee, because let me tell you, I did my tour of duty back during the Grell Wars.)

3. Jerry/Daphne from Some Like it Hot

First of all, this movie's amazing and if you haven't watched it and don't know the very famous ending, go remedy that right now. And then chase it with this fic. I'll wait.

I'm firmly in the camp that believes Jerry/Daphne is genderfluid, and holy cow, is this a lovely little story of self-discovery and falling in love. It's just so special to me. It makes me smile like a damn fool every single time.

4. Fem!Shep from Mass Effect

Okay, this one's kind of cheating because Shepards are customizable and can be anything you want, but I loved the idea from the get-go. That's in part because fem!Shep's model still moves like male!Shep, and it's especially noticeable when she sits, but it also just kind of feels fitting with a lot of the dialogue options. In conclusion, my Shepard was great and I need to replay that game with Legendary Edition because I miss her deeply.

5. Maevaris Tilani from Dragon Age

Mae's wonderful on so many levels and she's a character I'm very excited to meet face-to-face in Veilguard. She's stunning, an absolute powerhouse, she's good friends with my my beloved Dorian, and her relationship with her late chubs hubby was beautiful. I'm pretty sure she's not going to be romanceable, but if she was, I think my Rook would be doomed.

6. Hana from Tokyo Godfathers

This movie's a treasure and so is Hana. I like that she's old, she's stubbly, she doesn't pass flawlessly, but by god, if anyone deserves to be a mom, it's her.

7. Angel from Rent

Another genderfluid character! At least, that's my best guess. I've always loved that we have no fucking clue exactly what flavor of genderqueer Angel is, that not even the cast seems unanimous on it.

I loved Rent when I was younger, thought it was so deep and profound, and it's kinda not but Angel was easily my favorite character. Still is.

8. The Laughing Cow and the Lactaid Cow

They're cows that don't have udders and they're gay and in love, I don't make the rules.

9. Anode and Lug

Transfem lesbian bots from RiD's (the comic run IDW Arcee is from) much more competently written sister series, they're a demonstration of how to do it right. I like that one transitioned medically and the other didn't. Anode features very prominently in my Arcee fix-it fic and I grew very attached to her while writing it.

10. Marco from Star vs. the Forces of Evil

I'm gonna level with you, I never actually watched this show. But I was very invested in this one back in the day and disappointed when it never came true.

Honorable mention: Art the Clown from Terrifier

While I don't exactly headcanon Art as transfem, there's a fic on ao3 that explored the idea and I kind of dug it. I could see Art much younger, with many possible futures laid out, and that being one of them. I think if something fundamental hadn't broken in his soul/brain, he would have been either trans or a fruity old drag queen, happy as a clam.

Mind you, this is all fanon talk. My jaw would hit the floor with horror if this became canon and Art would go straight on the pile of characters I get yelled at for "misgendering" because if I refuse to swallow rotten food.

[rustedleopard]

Well, I'm in a bit of a talking mood today, so I'll give you some of my Takes™ on his character. This is gonna be a bit incomplete/somewhat scatterbrained, so. Beware? I suppose. Also, I find it worthwhile to replay the game/watch a playthrough of all of the routes (or at least the Steamworks to the end of a Pacifist playthrough and the cutscene that plays in Zenith Martlet's battle to get a better sense for him) and draw your own conclusions as well.

Good Intentions, Bad Outcomes: Chujin Ketsukane is a character that only wants the best for everyone. That's one of the biggest things about his character: no matter his actions, good or bad, he only did them with the best intentions in mind. The problem is that he fixates so heavily on his good intentions that it sorta gives him the mental freedom to do what he wants as long as he thinks that the outcome will be "for nothing short of the best." It doesn't matter so much that his Axis robots posed a danger to everyone when he presented them to King Asgore, he's making these robots to protect monsterkind against humans because he believes that Asgore is inadequate for the task even if he becomes a god. Ceroba had to take on a job that she hates to provide for the family despite Chujin being a pretty capable structural engineer who could find a job elsewhere/charge for his services because Chujin feels like the best way to make things better in the Underground/for Kanako is to do volunteer work. Chujin built a massive elaborate mansion for his family to live in because he wants the best for his family, even though that blew through all of the family's savings. And while he was taken aback by how violently Axis killed Integrity, a child (which. if we take the pillar FUN value as proof of what happened to them, they got their head half-blasted off. Holy shit), that doesn't stop him from disobeying monster law by taking their SOUL and subjecting it to experiments because he has the greater good of monsterkind in mind. His dying wish (besides wanting his wife/family to be happy) is to task Ceroba with killing an innocent human and use their SOUL for his project and also rope another Boss Monster into his work because he believes that his Boss Monster Serum will be what saves everyone. And when Chujin experiences pushback (because even bad actions done with good intentions are still bad actions) it's not "Where did I go wrong?" it's "Why? Why why why? Why can nobody else see what I'm seeing? I'm only trying to do what's best for everyone! Why can nobody recognize my efforts?!"

Fear of Humanity: I brought it up earlier but Chujin has a massive fear of/hatred for humans, which also motivates a lot of his actions. He staked his whole career on building Axis robots to combat humans because he believes that even Asgore as a god wouldn't be able to protect monsterkind from humans. In his conversation with Martlet during the No Mercy Route Zenith Martlet boss fight, he calls humans "incapable of decency in any form" and cites war stories and the Snowdin Incident as examples of humanity's natural depravity (he doesn't speak as though he's had any personal experience with a human, which--if you remember that he came across Integrity once they were already killed by Axis--he might've never have even met a living human. If that's the case, all he has are very biased accounts of humans). He risked his life over and over again engineering his Boss Monster Serum--to the point that he killed himself--because he was so scared of humans and felt like monsterkind never would've stood a chance against them in war unless he found a way to turn them into Boss Monsters. One thing to note is that despite how Chujin sees humans as these horrible, wicked, morally bankrupt beings, he believes that a "pure" human SOUL would make his serum work. This presents a paradox: either all humans are as evil as he believes them to be and by telling Ceroba to find a "pure" human SOUL, he's setting his wife up for a golden goose chase OR it's possible for a human to be "pure," which flies in the face of his belief that all humans are evil and he's wrong about humanity as a whole. I bet the hypocrisy never even occurred to him though.

Pride over Reason: I've touched on this a bit but he is a very prideful person. Like with the "Good Intentions, Bad Outcomes" part above, part of why he doesn't give up on his Axis robots despite the pushback from Asgore and the disapproval of his coworkers is because he has this unshakable belief that he is right and everyone else is wrong and he's going to prove it. He eventually did prove that he was capable of building a functioning guard robot, but at that point his coworkers had lost respect for him and he had lost his job (the final Axis Model that Chujin showed to Asgore was 11? 08? I don't recall which one specifically, but it was not the Model 14 that Clover deals with in the Steamworks. So that, coupled with the robot parts in his offices, means that he likely worked on more Axis Models at home. At that point, who is he doing it for besides himself? Asgore won't hear him out anymore and he's no longer employed at the Steamworks. He refuses to accept that the task might be beyond his capabilities). He lies to his wife about getting fired from the Steamworks by saying that he retired because he doesn't want her to think less of him. He repeatedly experimented on himself with the Boss Monster Serum despite knowing it was dangerous because he believed so hard in the idea that he was right about his theory even being possible that he ignored all the warning signs. And when his serum started killing him, he blamed the SOUL he used for being inadequate and "impure" instead of questioning his methodology. So confident was he about being right about his theory, that he opened the gates to the personal hell he threw himself into--the mess that could've died with him without anyone else knowing--and led his wife (and unknowingly his daughter) right into the heart of it.

Keep in mind that Chujin doesn't show these aspects of himself easily. To pretty much everyone else in the Underground, he comes across as a nice guy, altruistic, kind to a fault, etcetera. Think of how he's perceived as like different faces of a die (🎲 <- this type of die) where each person he interacts with only sees one face. To Kanako, he's her wonderful dad who made her bed and video games and always tried to provide everything for her, even his own life as a Boss Monster. To Ceroba, he's her loving husband who's saving the Underground and is practically flawless. To Martlet, he's her very kind mentor and practically a father figure. To his coworkers at the Steamworks, he was always a bit hopeless. To Axis, he's his very kind creator. To the people he helped, he was kind and selfless. To Asgore, he's the reckless guy who set his child's grave on fire. Unless you're digging into him and his character, you'd likely never see his core.

[october-faye]

85 hours and eleven minutes. 😤

I've finished Veilguard. Spoilers and whinging under the cut.

Outcome as follows:

💗 Davrin (romanced)

💀 Harding (dead :( )

🤡 Solas (tricked, because fuck that guy)

*Sigh*

The ending was decent, delivering on spectacle and scale. I enjoy the combat, especially zipping around as a rogue and scoring headshots with precision aiming. That never got old. Elgern'an was hyped up all game, but he was the easiest boss fight by a mile.

However, the more I played the ending, the more I realised I was essentially replaying the final mission of Mass Effect 3, this time in Minrathous and starring Temu Commander Shepard.

And I say that as someone who doesn't even hate Rook. I've just never played an RPG that has fought this damn hard to keep its protagonist from being the slightest bit interesting.

Even their relationship with Varric, something the ending hypes up as being so important, happened almost entirely off-screen before the game begins. I just can't deal with their grief being given focus while characters who actually knew Varric for far longer (the Inquisitor, Harding, Dorian) have nothing to say about his death.

On a more positive note, I did develop a fondness for the companions. I'd like to do a replay as a mage and to take another romance out for a spin.

After that, I think I'm done with Bioware.

I say this completely without malice, but between the devaluing of their writing staff and their established lore, I can't say the direction of this series (or of Mass Effect) is anything I want to invest time and energy thinking about. I'll replay the old games as often as I ever had, but the writing in this game (plot, dialogue, tone, vocabulary, characterisation, relationships, all of it) was so disappointing. But I couldn't even laugh at it because it felt like I was laughing at myself for ever giving a shit when Bioware's remaining leadership clearly doesn't.

Some have speculated Bioware are trying to softly reboot the series and attract new players, but I don't think they'll bring in enough to make up for the portion of the long-term fanbase they've alienated.

This game was technically solid, and it had okay combat, level design and mechanics. But it excels at nothing. The writing, characters, lore and role playing was always the unique selling point of Bioware's games. Without that, you've got a mid-tier God of War clone that shines brightest while it lazily retreads the company's glory days.

Final score for Veilguard:

Gameplay: 7 out of ten.

Story: 3 out of ten.

On balance: 5 out of ten. Would play again, but only once more out of curiosity.

[ell-vellan]

I've been replaying Inquisition to prepare for Veilguard and god, the way I feel actually homesick walking around Skyhold, knowing it's for the last time. Knowing what we know now about what becomes of this place.

Our safe haven after Haven. Beautiful and peaceful and safe. Perched above the whole world, looking down on both Orlais and Ferelden. Our own castle, our pennants and throne, a room of our own with the fireplace and desk and balconies to see miles of the Frostbacks. It was our refuge! Skyhold kept us safe and protected us from the storm when we were at our lowest. We came to it broken and abandoned, we rebuilt it and made it ours. We played pranks with Sera and hung out in the library with Dorian and planted herbs in the garden and watched Cullen lose Wicked Grace (and his clothes) in the grand hall. Some of us fell in love in that castle, that tavern named after us, in that loft above the stables. We found little hidden nooks and secret shortcuts and collected bottles of alcohol from all over Thedas, for some reason. We inspired hope, we raised an army, we played political games, we saved the world.

Solas painted our deeds in his rotunda, and all the while we never knew it was his sanctum, first.

So much warmth and beauty after the fear, disorganization, defeat. No more hasty tents pitched in snow and mud at Haven, you have your own room.

Walking around, I've been taking in the way the light shines through the trees with leaves red and gold, surviving by some trick of magic at the top of a mountain. Dust motes floating on shafts of light, through stained glass, your banners flapping gently in the wind. It feels like you can breathe easy for the first time since you wake up disoriented and in chains with a glowing left hand.

And knowing what happens to Skyhold after... left empty with only a few quiet caretakers and scholars, then conquered, at last, by Regret.

Reclaimed not by us or our closest allies, but by a plucky band of mercenaries led by a man we met in passing and promoted at a whim in our role as Inquisitor, and probably forgot about soon after. A minor character, an insignificant War Table mission quest line in a game full of world-altering decisions. But it was the little guys, the regular people - your quartermaster, your arcanist, your lead scout - who risked their lives one more time to return to a place they also once called home.

In the end, Sutherland's company that you had a hand in creating, were the ones trusted and called on to reclaim Skyhold for us. Because it was their home for a time, too. The place where they found refuge from the storm, found each other, banded together. A little company of adventurers, of friends and heroes who loved each other just like the heroes we had once been before. Not famous, not yet, maybe not ever. Just regular people trying to do good. Harding and a few characters we barely knew, even though we played a pivotal role in their lives.

We were their boss, that's all, and when we left they were the ones who came back to Skyhold when the Inquisitor couldn't. It wasn't only our home - it was a symbol. Skyhold meant something to them, too.

Walking around Skyhold knowing it will never be ours again after this is over, and we won't ever get to return? Maybe I'm just being sentimental, but..it hurts 🥺

Anyway, I love Skyhold and you should read the short story Callback from Tevinter Nights, if you haven't already.

[enbyeighthdoctor]

since watching the fallout show ive been replaying fallout 3 and gotten kinda obessed with it so heres my doctor who x fallout au ideas

i know the games take place exclusively in america however of course this would take place in the uk

all timelords are ghouls. in this au they would be normal pre war humans who became ghoulified since its obviously important for timelord characters to be far older then normal humans

the doctors are all siblings or at least related in some way

as they all love travel they spread out across different parts of the country when the bombs dropped

because of divides, differing factions and blockades the doctors haven't run into each other much at all. however all have run into at least one other sibling at least once

except the fugitive doctor who was in ireland at the time the bombs dropped and has no way to contact/make her way to the mainland

because of this she has had a hard to staying sane and almost became feral from not knowing/believing that her familyis dead

she ends up finding a way to lock those memories away (hypnosis perhaps?) so she doesnt lose her mind

river has somehow bumped into everyone at some point (god knows how she got to ireland)

when twelve settles down in the ruins of bristol uni (a new settlement?), river is how they all eventually (minus the fugitive doctor) meet each other again as a group since she manages to get the word out to all of them

all companions also exist in this world (even if in canon they would be dead before 2077, not born within 200 years after 2077 or not human/from the same dimension)

[autisticsupervillain]

It's Fictional Throwdown Friday!

This Week's Fighters...

Chara vs God!

Conditions:

Post Genocide Route Chara.

Scenario:

After Chara and the Player destroy the Undertale universe, they move on to the next world to keep destroying and becoming stronger. They come across the WorldBox reality, where God tries to stop them.

Analysis: Chara

The year was 20XX. It had been XX years since the monsters and humans went to war. Monsterkind had become little more than a fading memory in human history, having been sealed away deep beneath Mt. Ebott. For the first time in forever, a human set foot on the mountain and fell into the Underground. For the first time in years, a human had come face to face with monsters.

The Dreemurrs, the royal family of the Underground, took the child in and raised them as their own. Chara, the first fallen human... did not come to the mountain for a happy reason. For reasons they would never say, Chara hated humanity. It was possible, even likely, that the Dreemurrs were the first loving family that they'd ever had.

So, in a misguided effort to free their new people, Chara roped their adopted brother Asriel into a plan. Chara would kill themself by eating golden buttercup flowers, slowly and painfully dying day by day in a brutal poisoning so that Asriel could absorb its soul and cross the barrier keeping monsters underground. Once there, Asriel would use his god-like power to slaughter humans and steal their souls, all to gain enough power to destroy the barrier and free monsterkind. Asriel refused, simply dropping Chara's body off at their village, where he was slaughtered, kickstarting the second war between humans and monsters.

Chara would be revived, in a sense, when Frisk, the eighth and final human, fell into the Underground. Chara would seemingly serve as their narrator throughout their journey, passively observing Frisk's quest to escape the Underground on most routes. Except for one. Should the Player choose to slaughter every last living being in the Underground, Chara will.... change...

Chara will inadvertently absorb the Player's power as they get stronger and stronger, losing all semblance of humanity, morality, and compassion as the Player teaches them the language of violence. Chara becomes your Execution Points. Chara becomes your Levels of Violence. Chara becomes the power you get when you kill, the rush you feel as you grow stronger. Chara becomes the monster you made it, the demon that comes when you call its name.

Chara's first act in this new form is to destroy reality completely, leaving nothing but an empty void in the game's place. The world is gone. You've completed it. Beaten it. Milked it of all content. Move on to the next, partner.

If you ever want to go back, you'd have to reset the world completely. And The Demon will only allow you to do that if you give it something in exchange. The Player trades it Frisk's soul for the chance to replay the game again, do another run however they want. But you'll never be in control again. You've lost that right. And The Demon can from now on hijack your control of Frisk's body whenever they choose.

Given that Frisk is effectively bound to Chara's will in this ending, everything they can do is at its disposal. You have to get the Demon's permission to do a True Reset of a Genocide Run and they can hijack Frisk's body from your control and use all of their powers to their heart's content. With Frisk's DETERMINATION, the Demon can reset time, retry fights over and over as often as they need, and jump across timelines. The conversation with Goner Kid suggests that every individual FUN Value is its own seperate universe, giving the Undertale reality a hundred of timelines. Hundreds of timelines that Chara wipes out in one blow. And as the soulless, undead husk you've turned them into, Chara has none of Frisk's human limitations, able to absorb souls, possess bodies, and carry on as the disembodied consciousness narrating your journey. Even the Player, for all their power, for the transcendental power they hold over reality, cannot override Chara's newfound power. It will override Frisk's body and slaughter every friend you've made every time you ever try to forget what you did.

In your quest to see what would happen, you've turned a depressed child into a demon that lives only for violence. Let the numbers rise, let the blood flow, let us get stronger. This world is nothing but a game, so let us complete it together. Kill everything within, get as strong as possible, and move on to the next. No story, no heart, no context, only stats, only power, only stronger. Only DETERMINATION.

What's the matter, Partner? Aren't you proud of the ending you've earned? Aren't you proud of Your Best Friend?

Analysis: God

For all of its existence, humanity has asked itself one simple question. Why are we here? What being created us? And if a singular being did create us, what do we call them? What is God?

I can't pretend to have an answer to these questions, but I can hope that our God isn't a gamer. Because I've seen what happens when gamers play God.

Worldbox is not a story with a narrative. It is a World, that is a sandBox. Everything that exists within it is a doll for you, the Player, to play with, and the being that this world calls God is simply your avatar for making that happen. They are not an actual depiction of any religious interpretation of the Lord Almighty. Thankfully. I was skirting close enough to blasphemy with SMT, I don't need to tempt fate.

But even without biblical precedent, one would have to be packing some serious power to give themselves the title of God. And the Player has plenty of that to spare.

They can literally draw the landscape like it's Microsoft Paint, create life to the limit of their imagination, give rise to kingdoms and wars, before topping it all off by annihilating it all in one fell swoop. God can not only create mankind in the form of medieval kingdoms, but also freely edit their traits, personality, biological characteristics, and name, down to bestowing immortality, cursing beings to be weak and miserable, and even turning them into zombies.

God created and can manipulate the forces of nature, creating acid rain, blood rain, thunderstorms, and tornadoes. They can build up volcanoes and annihilate them just as easily, create forests and turn them into sentient life forms, and create nanotechnology to terraform the land to their will. This brings us to their remarkable ability to create technology generations more advanced than any seen in the world, from grey goo swarms to nuclear bombs to antimatter bombs that wipe continents from existence. Any fantastical creature, from dragons to robots, to orks and elves and zombies is theirs to create and alter, blessing them with superhuman strength, giant sizes, or superhuman speed.

The most dangerous creature in their arsenal would have to be the Avatar form they take when they choose to tear shit up themselves: Crabzilla. A towering giant monster crab that cannot be beaten by even the strongest of God's creations, more than capable of taking down dragons and wiping civilizations.

The Player can create entire universes, each with their own geographies and laws of physics, speed up and stop time, erase, create, and overwrite up to thirty worlds at once, and spin the entire Earth around on the tip of their finger. Because why not? This is a game with no rules, a sandbox without limit. If you can play the game a certain sadistic way... don't you kind of have to?

What happens when you give a gamer godhood and a sandbox to try it out in? Terror. Plan and simple terror. The world is their sandbox and you're just living in it.

Throwdown Theme:

Throwdown Breakdown:

Here we go, the game with no consequences vs the game the tries to give you consequences.

Now, to clarify one thing, John Worldbox is not literally the Player. Not in the way Undertale's Player is, anyways. Undertale is the game that acknowledges you digging through its save files, to the point of hiding Gaster lore in its decompiled code. Meanwhile, in Worldbox, there is, at least, the very bare bones of a setting that God is a character in. They don't view the world as fiction in the same way Undertale's Player does, because there's none of the required fourth wall breaking fuckery.

As such, Chara and the Player should be capable of actually fighting each other here. So let's begin.

This is very much a hax vs stats fight, with Chara's one hundred universe reality wiping edging out God's thirty universes cap fairly substantially. But, God has several ways of weakening this gap, cursing them with weakness, infecting them with diseases, and using alterations to their DNA to weaken Chara's host body Frisk. But, even with those limits in place, Chara still has the stats to fodderize any creature the Player can create, up to Crabzilla. While dragons and Crabzilla can survive mountain busting space lasers, that's small scale in the face of universe busters and would be a massive liability if anything due to giving the Demon more EXP to work with and making that stat gap even worse.

Time manipulation counters out, as both characters are immeasurable in speed and neither has the feats needed to effect the other with such methods. Chara can move even after reality has been reduced to a timeless empty void (and scales to Frisk, who can do the same against Flowey and Asriel), while God predates and created time itself. The Worldbox Player could attempt to negate the Demon's connection to Frisk by overriding its control of them, but Chara has overriden the control of the Undertale Player with ease, indicating they can do the same here.

The real thing that makes this contest Chara's game is the Worldbox Player's inability to erase something of their nature. While God has erased universes and even souls from existence, Chara is a bit more complicated than that. For one, Frisk's soul and DETERMINATION, which Chara literally owns, has been able to overcome attempted soul destruction and existence erasure, in particular from Asriel. Secondly, Chara's true nature is something more than just a ghost or soul....

Chara does not have a soul at this point. It did at one point, but that soul died with Asriel. If Chara's soul lingered in any way, Asgore would've used it to open the barrier, after all. Chara was a disembodied consciousness that latched onto Frisk in response to their DETERMINATION, but it mutates into something even more in the Genocide Route. Chara becomes your stats. Your LOVE. Your EXP. That's Chara. That's the Demon you turned them into. And the Player simply hasn't been shown to erase noncorporeal, almost abstract, beings that lack even a soul to destroy. Chara isn't a human or a monster anymore.... They're the Demon that comes when its name is called.

The Worldbox Player would provide an entertaining boss fight, before falling as yet more free EXP. In one hit, the Worldbox reality will be erased and it shall move on to the next. Chara seems to have a knack for giving Players their first taste of permanent consequences.

This Throwdown's Winner is...

Chara Dreemurr!

....

....

....

....

Why are you still here?

....

....

....

....

....

We erased this world.

Let us move onto the next.

....

....

....

....

I see.

You cannot escape your sense of perverse sentimentality.

....

I don't understand it.

....

....

....

....

Do you wish to recreate this world?

❤️YES NO

....I see.

You don't seem to understand.

You have no SOUL left to bargain with.

You are not the one in control.

[derekscorner]

Ghost of Sparta is Good

I recently replayed it on PS3 and it's truly a shame this game is lost to emulators or the retro console owners.

The PS3 version in particular really highlights how hard those PSPs were churning to keep up the detail. I'm not one to care about graphics myself but it's hard to not appreciate how that was pulled off.

Of course, I won't sit here and tell you the story is stellar. I do not think it's bad in the slightest but it can be silly like any GoW game.

Such as Kratos forgetting Deimos. I can buy that he assumed he had died and he even yells at his mother for her telling him so but to forget him is silly as can be once you learn that Deimos is the origin of Kratos tattoo.

That large, red, body size tattoo on his body was inspired by Deimos' birthmark. A reminder not to forget. lol

Then there is Atlantis. You learn that Kratos is the one who sunk Atlantis in the GoW universe, you're controlling him as he does it. It's one more on the list of affronts that make you question why Kratos wasn't dealt with sooner.

Which this is a problem any prequel or interquel can have. Sometimes you have no good explanation for a thing that happened in the titles proceeding them despite being made after.

And this is classic GoW, few of us are here for air-tight narrative consistency. It's just a story thing I notice each time I play it.

The only story bits these prequels do that I feel takes away impact is Ascension and Chains of Olympus since Kratos not only kills three immortals, one demi-god/fury, and the god queen Persephone, but Ares' plot to attack Olympus is leaked.

This can make the necessity of Pandora's Box in GoW 1 seem just a flat out lie and it can leave you wondering why Ares was left be for the ten years between Ascension/Chains of Olympus and GoW 1.

But, again, those are minor things. Each of these titles do something greater than their faults by showing Kratos' descent into madness in GoW 3.

Once you play Ascension to see how he escaped his oath, once you see him have to traumatize and forsake his daughter (again) in Chains of Olympus, and once you see him cause the death of his mother and brother in Ghost of Sparta it makes sense.

Kratos was never a great person but he valued family more than you'd expect given his character so when a man with that many flaws and rage loses his humanity you get what you saw in GoW 3.

He is no anti-hero in GoW 3. Kratos is a villain, you are helping him destroy the world and the consequences be damned.

Though I am aware of how some find Deimos' heel turn in the game rushed I do still think the story is decent.

I personally like it because I think it's button mapping is the best in the classic series making it more fun for me to play. And, truth be told, it's the only title where you actually play as the god of war.

It's just fun to go on an adventure as a god in the classic series....I have no clever way to end this. Bye!

[lumineescente]

Seungjin drabble (slowtober challenge)

hii im doing a thing called slowtober (made by @/oeildesaturne on instagram, french speaking folks check it out!! although be aware of tw mental health and eds talks) and i’m posting on twitter a seungjin au per word

for the ninth days (october 23nd - 27th) the word is "nostalgia" and it's the end of this challenge for me!!

It's the last day to post, it was hard to get inspired I thought of the usual exes to lovers trope but there really was something missing, so I went with a reincarnation/cursed trope

Tw: implied angst and death (thus the reincarnation) in a full fic the ending would be happy

AND if you enjoyed this challenge who is now over you can vote on this form for your favorite that I’ll be writing into a full fic on ao3! (“soumettre” is “submit” btw)

if you want to check all the drabbles you can go here

thank you for your interest for the whole challenge or just this drabble it was fun to do:)

When Seungmin falls asleep he sees it all. 

The first life he has been with Hyunjin, the one life he had thought love was easy, love was given, like he earned it simply because he was alive and so was Hyunjin. They got a bit cocky. Defied the gods because they thought love, their love, was stronger than anything they could throw at them. 

They took Hyunjin away from him. Cursed him to remember it in all his next lives and in spite he swore to never stop looking for Hyunjin in those other lives. 

When he closes his eyes he sees it all. Diseases, hate, wars, everything the gods threw at them to make sure they could not see happiness through their love. Seungmin remembers them all, feels it over and over as they replay in his mind, all to taste Hyunjin's love for the little time the god would allow him in each life. It is all worth it.

After all this time Seungmin has learned that it was no use to search the world for Hyunjin - the life he had spent working as a sailor months on the sea, was carved in his mind like a tattoo - he knew the gods' sadistic little games would make them cave and eventually put Hyunjin in front of him, when he does not expect it most of the time. He is just a pun in all of it, all he can be grateful for is that Hyunjin does not know anything about it. 

All he can be grateful for is that in every life he loved Hyunjin and Hyunjin loved him back over and over, again and again. While Seungmin knows all about him, and wholeheartedly loves everything about the man, no matter which name, no matter which story he carries, Hyunjin always had to learn to love Seungmin and he never failed. It makes Seungmin open his eyes, every time.

In comparison to some of his other lives, this one has been calmer, but awfully lonely. He has never spent so many years without meeting Hyunjin, at least once. He tries to keep it together, and follow his hope and guts that he will eventually end up on him, as he replays in his mind every time he has met Hyunjin. 

In a church. In a pianist concerto. In a painter workshop. In the street. On a bus. 

Hyunjin would smile at him, their eyes would met, a strand of hair would fall on his forehead, Seungmin would have to stop himself from touching him, his heart would beat the same way it always does, like it has been broken all the years he’s spent without him and gets suddenly fixed, back to life when their paths cross once again. Seungmin vowed his eternity to Hyunjin and gladly carried it more like a blessing than a burden. No matter what the gods try to punish him from, he would endure the pain, he would remember the pain, he would be swallowed by the nostalgia when he is by himself and he waits for Hyunjin to bring him back to life. 

Seungmin waits. 

*

On a spring day the city he lives in is always lively. He goes to work and sees a bunch of children going to school hand in hand with their parents, and Seungmun finds himself recalling the very few lives in which he had been able to experience this joy with Hyunjin. 

The days are always similar, the nightmares almost keep him up all night long, and he mindlessly falls into his routine. Today something feels different. Maybe it is because he can not hear any birds chirping when he goes outside, or because the sun shines a bit too brightly and there is no spring breeze to cool it down, and time feels like it has been slowed down. Or maybe Seungmin has just been lonely for too long, missing Hyunjin like a part of him had been taken away from him, and his hope slightly breaks a bit more every day. 

As he walks down the street, he tries to not dwell too much in the nostalgic feeling, the melancholy that is taking up all the space in his heart, almost taking over the love he feels, the love that makes him not fall completely into madness. 

There is a slight ringing of an outside bell that makes him raise his head. There is no wind still the delicate chimes’ noise continues. He looks up to the sign over the top of the boutique and does not recognize the shop. It is an antique shop. He follows his instinct and pushes the front door. 

Seungmin wonders if the shop is empty. He sees no one behind the counter and he hears no noise except from the front bell ringing when he pushes and closes the door. The shop is full of different objects, from furniture to decorations going through jewelry and other accessories. It does not seem like it is organized in any kind of logic, all the objects mixing up with each other no matter what use they are but maybe Seungmin does not know any better. 

He finds himself recognizing some vintage items that he has used during his past lives and finds it amusing that in this time and life they might be considered as valuable or precious. 

Seungmin loses track of time as he explores through the shelves, lost in his memories. He finds what seems to be a twentieth century little metal box that he carefully opens. In it there were a bunch of old letters. The papers seemed to have gone through a hard time, as they were stained, torn in some places, and he could barely read them. The letters feel familiar but he is not sure why. Until he finds under all of them a photograph. 

He almost drops it when he sees it. 

In all the lives he has lived and been reborn into, none of them had ever crossed. Yet he sees his own face in the photograph and next to him, Hyunjin's. It is an old police school's picture from the middle of the twentieth century that he remembers very well. He had met Hyunjin there and they had become best friends for a while. 

There were only a few lives in which he had not had the pleasure and the chance to kiss Hyunjin. This life had been one. With the state of the world, the constant supervision of their officers, two boys being in love was ridiculous. Hyunjin was supposed to marry a girl, the daughter of a family close to him that he had known since childhood. 

Seungmin takes on a deep breath. He tries to not grip the photograph too tightly so as to not damage it. 

Hyunjin never got the opportunity to love either her or him. The attack that killed him happened a few weeks after this photograph was taken. 

"I'm sorry," a voice says behind him, "I didn't realize someone was here." 

He turns around and the surprise makes him drop the photograph. It slides down on the floor until it reaches the feet of the one, owner of the shop surely, who bends down to pick it. His black hair falls in front of his face in the motion. Seungmin feels his legs weak like each time it has happened. 

Hyunjin looks up to him, photographs in hand and smiles at him. Words get choked up in Seungmin's throat. It has been so long and Hyunjin is so beautiful in this life too. Wearing a casual outfit, headphones around his neck and hair tied up in a ponytail. He looks healthy and happy, eyes sparkling and light makeup on, Seungmin notices. 

"Oh," Hyunjin whispers as he looks at the photograph, "you found this? I've always found this photograph very intriguing." 

It takes everything Seungmin has to not run to hug the man in front of him and to just move his head, "really?" He asks. 

Hyunjin gets closer and Seungmin can smell his perfume all over him. He shows him the photograph and points to his own self, not that he could be aware of that. 

"This man's features are so similar to mine," he explains. Seungmin nods slightly. "But I've looked up in my family and I seem to have no connection to him."

Seungmin’s not sure if he manages to utter anything as an answer. Hyunjin points at the box, “the letters are hard to read but some are signed by his name, I found who he was by looking at archives, I think they were never sent."

He seems thoughtful for a moment while Seungmin does not know what to say. 

"Sorry, I must bore you with all this information," he suddenly apologizes. 

"No, no," Seungmin answers, "it sure is a very weird coincidence." 

Hyunjin looks at him with kind eyes and then back at the photograph. 

"Well," he whispers, "it gets even weirder." 

He points at the man in the picture that is Seungmin, the real one holds his breath. 

"This man looks like you." 

Seungmin blinks a few times. There is a voice in head that desperately screams for him to tell Hyunjin everything. But the few times he had tried to do so, Hyunjin never believed him, or their time together was cut even shorter. However, never had they been confronted with this kind of proof. 

“You’re right,” he answers finally. 

Hyunjin shrugs, “maybe it is just a coincidence, right? Some celebrities' faces sometimes look like old paintings or pictures, maybe we just have basic faces…” 

He blushes, “not that I think you look basic.. not at all you’re not basic, your face is very pretty…”

He hides his own face in his hands, embarrassed. Seungmin laughs quietly. 

“Yours is too,” he tells him. 

Even behind the hands he sees the blush expand on Hyunjin’s face. Eventually he gains back his composure and looks back at Seungmin. 

“I’m sorry, it’s my first time ever opening this shop and it’s been my dream but I’m not quite sure what I’m doing,” he tells him. 

“It’s okay. I think it’s very nice that you seem to care about all of it a lot.”

Hyunjin nods, “I sure do. By the way, I’m Hwang Hyunjin.” 

Seungmin freezes. This is also a very unusual thing. In all the other lives, Hyunjin, which was his name in their first life and the name Seungmin has carried with him, had multiple different names. It is the first time he got back to his original name. He looks at the photograph, the letters and then the man. 

“I’m Seungmin,” he says carefully. 

He is not sure what to expect, maybe deep down a sign that Hyunjin would suddenly remember everything. It does not happen. Hyunjin just smiles more. 

“It’s very nice to meet you, Seungmin,” and Seungmin adores the way his name sounds in his voice. 

It’s always nice to meet you again and again, he thinks. 

[annamarabella-grumble]

mass effect replay thoughts, episode 10

episode 1 / episode 2 / episode 3 / episode 4 / episode 5 / episode 6 / episode 7 / episode 8 / episode 9

it’s sad picnic time on illium!

“we’re trying to call it ‘indentured servitude’ rather than slavery, but honestly humans are just prejudiced. it’s people’s own choice to enter slavery! i mean, indentured servitude.”

and then NO-ONE you talk to actually bothers calling it by its euphemistic term. it’s just “that quarian slave” this, “that quarian slave” that. in the end, shepard can throw her weight around a little and talk the synthetic insights rep into buying the contract and letting the quarian – whose name we do not even learn – go, but that’s barely a bandaid on a chasm of a wound. it’s a twig thrown across the abyss. no-one else is going to cross on the back of shepard’s interference. the player gets to feel good about this one thing, but the game is quick to remind you that there’s more where that came from, and short of sicing gianna parasini on the entire illium leadership, there’s nothing shep can do.

but. but. wasn’t it that someone who saves one life, saves the world entire? if mass effect is about working to save as many as possible, then saving one is still worthwhile. and it’s a damn sight better than looking away.

I LOVE AETHYTA SO MUCH. she truly is her father’s daughter – right down to the asari on thessia laughing “the blue off my ass” for warning them that spending their wild maiden years shaking their tits in some bar isn’t going to help prevent wars

it hadn’t occurred to me before playing this again, but man, i wish i could send ereba, the asari being courted by the soft-hearted krogan charr, to aethyta for advice. aethyta had a krogan dad, and i’m sure she’d have some, uh, wise and colourful words for ereba. alas, all shepard can do is tell her to listen to her heart.

also, i don’t think charr’s poetry is bad???? maybe because my standard for untenable lyrics is that one vogon poetry slam i went to, but dude.

samara. ma’am. ma’am, pls.

thane once again HOGGING ALL THE LENS FLARE (like, for real)

thaaaaaane – we’re going to romance him in this playthrough, for maximum tragedy. can’t wait to have my heart ripped out several months from now

it will tickle dishonored fans to hear that one viewer correctly cold-read zaeed and called there being an alternative armour skin for him in red – he’s space daud, sorry about it.

thane believes that his body and his spirit are separate — only his body kills, therefore his spirit is “clean.” that’s why thane can’t be daud, even though he’s named the assassin. if anyone’s daud, it’s zaeed. he’s who he represents himself to be, and you can hate him or love him, but he knows exactly who he is. right down to blowing up a slaughterhouse refinery, if it comes to it.

hunt for red october reference! i’d love to see joker pull a crazy ivan lmao. he could probably do it! and everyone would go a little pale around the nose

BIOTIC GOD. i had jack and zaeed with me, so we didn’t get the line, but my fave is when zaeed asks shep if she wants him to “kneecap this guy so he won’t follow you around”

for all that he’s dead, kaidan sure is haunting me

[dimonds456]

Fucking nailed it right on the head here.

I did have tags on this post but they got cut off so they're going into a reblog instead, sorry.

God i wish bendy were good. its one of my special interests and also one of my special hatreds. the worldbuilding was so captivating and they did NOTHING with it

bendy barely appears and the ink machine LITERALLY only has an effective role in chapter 1, the name of the game is rendered meaningless entirely by chapter 4, and the ending does nothing to serve the narrative whatsoever.

like the idea of sammy's cult or that the cartoon characters were living souls who got killed is interesting, and by the time we get to chapter 4 its completely forgotten about.

hell, chapter 4- which is one of the best chapters- SHOULD HAVE BEEN CUT ENTIRELY. it adds NOTHING to the game and the entire setting feels like an excuse for bertrum's boss fight and that's it. also it renders the decision to kill the projectionist in the previous chapter meaningless since it brings him back just to kill him again.

like what are they trying to say here

plus in putting all their eggs into the theorybait basket they literally “made characters and moved on” and never considered their place in the story as a whole. like the implications of allison being the one to kill susie (TWICE) are really bad if you think about them.

not to mention the accidental trans allegory they created by having 5/6 cartoon characters being male and a studio full of female employees and only two alice angels. like a lot of those other characters and borises and butcher gang members were probably women and the game never mentions this at all. it's only brought up in the books as a one-off thing and then completely forgotten about

sorry i'm going off about bendy specifically but you're so fucking right op. like imma be honest, i LIKE the idea of poppy playtime. genuinely i do. like it's been done before (and i remember describing it as “bendy but better” to a friend) but nothing is purely original, no story is. but then they made it blatantly clear they just want money with the whole nft... THING they did once the game blew up, and then none of the rest of the game truly *matters* anymore because we KNOW they're just chasing that game theory video

so matpat was honestly correct... he really IS killing indie games. which isn't his fault, like his channel is based on theorizing so theorizing about popular games will keep the lights on, but it's created this expectation that if you're an indie horror game then you should appeal to game theory's audience if you truly want your game to sell- which is a good goal to have since you should get money for all your hard work- but it just creates clones of previous games rather than anything truly innovative

what i want to see is poppy playtime completely blow our minds. i want to see them tell a good story with plenty of foreshadowing that can build to a good ending that makes you go "ohhhh" on replay.

Psst, psst, indie writers, I have a secret for you. If you are releasing your game in chunks and your players can figure out the ending before the game is fully out, then you've done your job correctly as a writer. That's a GOOD thing. Throw us theorists a bone, eh?

It really comes down to having a good narrative with interesting characters. Do the same old rinse and repeat story that's been told a million times over all you want, but if your characters are fun and the story is solid and the worldbuilding is at least halfway interesting, then congrats! You have, in theory, a good game!

Like, Star Wars is just your bog-standard hero's journey, a story which has been told millions of times over and over and over, but because the characters were interesting and it took place in outer space (which was REALLY COOL for the 1970s), it was successful. Literally the story of Star Wars is nothing special, but everything else was.

The reason fnaf did so well is because it's first and foremost a GOOD HORROR GAME. The game was very innovative for the time and flipped the lip on what the horror game genre was doing at the time, which was mostly freeroam while a monster hunted you in a map. In FNaF, you were forced into one room you couldn't leave while you waited for the monsters to come to YOU. It was unique, it was terrifying, and it built genuine paranoia no other game could at the time.

The lore and secrets were SECONDARY to the gameplay, which had come FIRST. The lore was intriguing, sure, but it was also nothing to write home about. The lore of FNaF 1 was "the robots are haunted, and here's why." That's literally it. 'Course, Golden Freddy is his own entity, but I don't think Scott had much of a plan for them in mind while making the first FNaF game (considering it was supposed to be his last game ever).

Modern indie horror games are making the mistake of putting the mystery above all else, which is easy to pull in an audience over. That's the true pitfall here. I don't care what the character designs are or how cartoony the setting is, they're not the main issue here.

Yes, kids were attracted to FNaF (I was one of them). But that's not FNaF's fault. The whole "horror for kids" genre is fine on its own, but it needs to fully embrace the horror elements again and let go of the mystery if that's truly gonna become its own genre. I don't like people calling mascot horror "a FNaF clone" because that misses the point of fnaf and what made it special in the first place.

Yes, Bendy should have been better. But they at least tried to innovate for the first two chapters. It's a mistake on their end that they dropped the ball. But it's also not their fault that kids picked their game up in the first place. BATIM never advertised itself as a kid's game, and only started to become that once they realized toys sell. Once they realized that, then suddenly Bendy became a product first and a piece of art second, which is where the game began to suffer.

I need to stop talking, but the point is indie horror needs to embrace the horror genre again, and "mascot horror" needs to embrace the story again. Once both of those things have been achieved, then the actual horror for kids genre can thrive on its own.

I'm not explaining this well and it's 6 AM (bing bong bing bong, yayy), so just. have this. I'm planning on making my own in-depth analysis on this whole issue at some point later down the line, but no promises.

Don't chase the game theory video- chase the analysis video.

k goodnight

“extremely marketable and only slightly scary horror game meant for ipad children to watch letsplays of” is a very unfortunate genre to watch the development of

[kimmimaru]

Its done. I finished it. Well, mostly. Still have some shit to do but I can do that on a replay. Anyways, here's my thoughts:

I cannot express how glad I am that Aerith died, even if it was a bit weird .

I love Sephiroth but for fucks sake that final battle bored me senseless it was so long. Once again the ending 'ruined' it kind of.

Rufus losing his cool was kind of sexy of him lol. Seriously that is going into fanfic from now on, the man does have a temper. And yes, I am pleased I guessed that the Viceroy was Rufus and that the war was a distraction.

Thoughts on Vince: Mmmmmmm. Also, he played a kind of watcher type role and although I would have loved to have him on the team I can understand why. 1. He's very powerful and may have made the game too easy. 2. He IS a weapon. One of the very last planetary weapons. Even if he is also human, its fitting he's watching and waiting to see if Cloud and the others will win or lose, if they lose then I guess the planet could just end it on its own terms.

Zack finally 'met' with Cloud. I have mixed feelings about that lol.

I will probably have more thoughts but for now this will do. Oh! I forgot: Did I don't know if I'm reading it correctly but when Tseng told Reno to (basically) 'get his priorities straight' was he implying that he gave Reno time off because he was actually having second thoughts about his job after Sector 7??? Because that's what it sounded like to me. What other priorities could he have meant? (I mean, Tseng's being a hyppocrite about that if its true because I am convinced he's all torn up over Aerith and his duty to Shinra too).

That hug. You know the one I mean. THE hug. Oh. My. God.

[kierancampire]

I thought if I am getting Ragnarok I should replay God of War to refresh myself, I have played the first 3 tons of times, I know the first one in particular very well! But this, I only played it the once, and although those NG+ files are there, no memory of it or how far in that is! I remember occasional boss battles and plot points, but replaying this, man, I didn't realise just how much I forgot! I forgot so much! I also completely forgot core mechanics and how to play the game, so I am glad I didn't start a NG+ file. While it sucks having to get everything again and redo everything from scratch, I'd be so lost on gear, abilities, everything! I remember going through the maze was a slog and good gear really helps there, but yeah, least this will refresh me and I am better set up for Ragnarok!

Also my neighbour is blasting music so incredibly loud, but like, incredibly loud, so much louder than normal. It's 8:20 pm and even with my headphones on and listening to YouTube, his music is so incredibly loud that I can hear it so incredibly clearly! I really am getting sick of this, he's just replaying the same song over and over, then playing it on the guitar and singing it, so it's just him blasting this same one song then playing it himself over and over, so incredibly loudly

[cobaltaris]

Aris Media 2023 #27: The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom

to be honest despite putting 100 hours into this I? don't know how to dissect this in my usual short-form reviews on this site? (this aged poorly i wrote like 10 paragraphs on it) guess we'll try because oh my god this was. an experience i wasn't ready for

so THAT was the imprisoning war...

also uh! Spoiler Warning! deep in the Read More for gameplay and story terms! i'm not gonna tell you how everything plays out but there is unrevealed stuff i need to go into, but being we're nearly a month out from release, that's mostly fine, i think

okay so breath of the wild aged kinda weirdly for me? it's a GREAT game but in retrospect it felt lacking compared tro some of my favorite Zelda games, especially in dungeons and storytelling, and i really was worried TotK wouldn't vibe with me cuz BotW looked to be a paradigm shift for the whole Zelda series

and? surprisingly, it all worked out?? i was so enthralled from beginning to end! having the same hyrule didn't end up mattering to me cuz i didnt replay BotW, and there was simply so much MORE to the world despite that. AND SO MANY KOROKS TO TORTURE AND CRUCIFY

not to mention when you can put a slab of iron together and put wheels and a stick on it and have it work as a great way to get around, the fun of traversal kinda overrode the thoughts i had about all that; the Zonai stuff is SO GOOD (that goes for both the devices and the people-okay mainly Mineru but can you blame me she is PERFECT)

SPEAKING OF CHARACTERS TO GET OFF HOT GOAT PEOPLE FOR A SEC; THIS F U C K

the memory stuff is kind of just okay in retrospect, didn't love the plot but the big key moments stuck with me, but GOD ganondorf is so good. they hit all the beats i was hoping for with him and probably made his most outright evil portrayal yet, while STILL making him so calm and in control that it's scary. the way they send him off is so good and please moots finish the game when you can cuz that ending OH MY GOD-

anyway! i just really liked vibing in this game doing shrines and whatnot, which with the new abilities are way more fun and memorable than in BotW. the jenga shrine is? amazing? Ultrahand makes every puzzle a joy to Ignore the Main Solution To, and Ascend and Recall are just outright broken and very fun to use. while I had more issues with durability this time i also love how natural and useful Fuse is; Rocket Shields are so fun and i wish I got more Rockets simply to use them more than I did

the characters are also a lot more fun this time around, and the returning ones got to shine way more! the Tarrey Town quest was SO good in this one, the Champions are a delight, the musical troupe you help out really stuck with me...and Addison. he's. he's a treasure. I'LL SUPPORT YOU

I didn't get too much out of the Sky Islands admittedly; they're still really cool but! generally repetitive after a bit and not super interesting, great atmosphere though. but it's the Depths that really caught me off guard, places in games with a lot of bounty to them but also HIGH levels of danger are some of my favorite things! but the thing i really loved about it is when i realized that it is Tears of the Kingdom's Dark World - its an exact mirror of the original world, Lightroots connecting to Shrines, water aboveground being walls in the Depths, and generally being a way harsher environment. once i realized that, it elevated it SO much, and along with a few things really made it feel like TotK was this hella cool mix of traditional and open-world Zelda

caves! finally back in this one! can i just say that between Vinny's pronunciation of them and their allure here i've gotten obsessed with finding them, every time i see one i just yell "BOOBEL GEM!!" and start firing arrows and hfgjfgjkfg

but no really the caves were such a sour missing part of BotW and their inclusion gives the world so much more needed complexity. i love exploring them, and to repeat this point again, it felt so Classic Zelda to go in one, solve an environmental puzzle, and get a Shrine out of it - and a free one almost always, which feels like the developers also bringing back how caves used to be! i need to say it again THIS GAME WAS SUCH A TREAT

that goes also somewhat for the dungeons, besides like, the Water Temple, which compared to other Water Temples felt extremely lacking, and even in this game it has...no scale? just feels like a regular place? BUT THE OTHERS. DAMN. even if i wish they were even bigger and had more to do, the fact they are real places with lore behind them to explore, different atmospheres - the Fire and Lightning ones EXCEED at this, especially in delivering great boss fights with the Sages' aid. too bad about that same cutscene repeating four times huh

there's even more i could go into it, like how the Gleeok fights are the most HYPE thing and i love them, or how i kinda still wish there was more enemy variety, and ALSO this game got me into the wonder that is house renovation, it's so good actually, but being i'm putting this all in a Tumblr post on a dashboard expected to be scrolled through at high velocity, i'll just cut it here because i loved this one too much. legit too much! it's a Top 3 Zelda, but there's almost too much to do and it can get overwhelming, and still areas left to improve on, but I am more than satisfied with what Tears turned out to be after my skepticism <3

Grade: S