#okay it's not really an episode per se but just for tagging purposes

[ridiasfangirlings]

So I've seen all the LSW movie now and I have Thoughts and it's been a while since I did any kind of anime review so I just had to type this up.

(Note 1: No, I'm not sharing any links to where to find it. I know there's a less-than-legal link floating around that you can find on Tumblr in the tag if you look around. I actually used Google Chrome and a VPN to rent LSW for 500 yen for two days from the official Bandai Channel site linked here.)

(Note 2: The entire thing has not been subbed yet as far as I know. My knowledge of Japanese is spotty at best especially when it comes to listening rather than reading, but I've read the novel translations and the manga enough that even without subs I have a pretty good idea of what's going on.)

-We open on Fushimi's rainy Scepter 4 induction ceremony that was shown in the trailer. I suddenly remember how in the novel it's mentioned that the raindrops don't hit Munakata because of his King powers and it makes the part in MK where he has Awashima holding an umbrella for him while everyone else gets soaked that much more peak troll.

-There's this weird computer-y thing as Fushimi closes his eyes and I don't know if it quite works for me? This isn't jungle guys, the Blues can just be fancy in the rain, it's cool.

-Fushimi takes the sword and they totally cut out Saru snarking back at Munakata about the whole 'pride and pledge and such isn't really necessary.' I wanted to see Fushimi being a little shit why do you deny me.

-They also cut out Fushimi seeing Yata's hand reaching for the sword, instead we only have Fushimi taking it as he voiceovers the whole 'The first King said take this hand. The second King said take this sword.' The background also gets all computer-y again and it looks a little cheap and weird? This is not the first strange decision this movie will be making.

-Then that weird kid from the sixth movie promo material who looks like he escaped from Handshakers and has pokeballs for eyes says something profound-ish, etc etc TIME FOR MIDDLE SCHOOL BABIES.

-We cut to Yata on the toilet. Not what it sounds like I swear.

-Middle school Misaki so cute and dissatisfied as he hides in the bathroom. He spots something in the next stall and climbs up to look, like Romeo ascending Juliet's toilet balcony or somesuch.

-Fushimi is also on the toilet. Also not what it sounds like.

-Flirting ensues, with Yata being cute and enthusiastic and Fushimi playing hard to get by yelling at him to go away. Ah, young love.

-Yata mentions his phone has been getting weird messages due to jungle. That's called spam, Yata-chan, and you're probably too young to be reading anything that has a lot of xs in the subject line.

-Triumphant video game music plays as Fushimi's voice gets all excited and he lets Yata come over to watch him, which is when we see poor baby has a bruise from being beaten up by upperclassmen. (I'd say that's what happens without Yata there to save him but he probably ended up getting beaten less in the movie than the novel precisely because of that XD)

-They've known each other for like two minutes and already Yata wants to beat people up to defend Fushimi's honor.

-Fushimi proceeds to beat his opponent in jcube while Yata yells about how amazing it is and we get that 'this guy is scary...but amazing' moment, aka the actual exact moment where Yata falls totally in love.

-Fushimi's triumphant smile gives me life.

-Cue Yata walking to school. We don't really get any exact passage of time indications here but I like to assume this was at least a few days later – Fushimi's still a bit standoffish but Yata has clearly already officially adopted him as New Best Friend.

-Yata gets Aya's letter in his locker and proceeds to show us all that yes, he can get even cuter than he already was.

-He goes running after Fushimi and there's this weird slo-mo thing for a moment? I feel like if we're going for that there should be like romantic music playing or something.

-Other students stare at them, wondering if these two are really going continue to be this gay in public. (Spoiler alert: yes. Yes they are.)

-And then Aya tackle-hugs Yata. I really like her voice, it sounds super cutesy in just the right affected way, and even the big anime eyes work well for her character (since I get the impression from the novel she's supposed to look young). Also that 'Mi-sa-ki-pyuun!' is so cute.

-'You know what would be completely gratuitous?' 'What?' 'If instead of Aya wearing pumpkin pants like she explicitly says she is in the novel, we put in a middle schooler pantyshot.' 'Great idea!' -Gora, probably.

-Yata hides behind Fushimi because he too has had enough of this fanservice.

-Yata tries to use Fushimi as his totally heterosexual excuse to get away from the scary girl and Aya's voice becomes noticeably less high pitched and cutesy as she talks to Fushimi. I think they did a good job with showing the shift in the way she talks to Fushimi versus how she speaks to Yata.

-Aya tells Yata about the jungle mission and then shows him all the hateful messages she received. Yata looks away and we see his own phone, with the mean chat messages his 'friends' exchanged about him. The former Yata team still sucks and are not even worthy of showing up in this movie.

-Yata adorably clings to Fushimi and have I mentioned he is adorable because I'm dying here.

-So our trio heads out to summon the airship. Aya shows Yata the program she created to decode jungle's hints and Fushimi noticeably sighs and walks away when Yata calls it 'cool.' Someone's jealous~

-Aya's mom calls and Yata takes the opportunity to go talk with Fushimi. This part is really abbreviated from the novel, with Fushimi only confirming that Aya's his cousin before Aya breaks in to ask Yata to talk to her mom, so we don't get any of the family talk between them. I get that there was no way the movie could fit everything in but I think it's an unfortunate loss that will pretty much continue throughout the movie – Yata's backstory gets really shafted here, continuing the trend of LSW tending to be more about Fushimi than about both Fushimi and Yata as it should be.

-Yata's face as he starts his girl impersonation, I can't. Fukujun's female voice sounds like an old woman, Aya is cracking up and so am I, this is beautiful.

-And Fushimi laughs. I think I like how the manga did this one better, in the movie it seems more like mocking laughter than real happy laughter that I think it's supposed to be, and it felt more like he was trying to suppress it. Basically even though Aya's like 'Fushimi's laughing?' I don't get the impression that this is supposed to be a rare event, which I think the novel was intending and which for me the manga managed to convey.

-They spot the airship in the distance and Fushimi starts recalculating the position as Yata stares in awe and Aya gets annoyed. No smiley face like in the novel though, alas.

-Fushimi's ready to give up on chasing the airship but of course Yata's fired up now, and the bicycle built for three kicks off in hot pursuit. Yata strains to peddle even though you know Aya and Fushimi combined probably weigh like barely anything.

-Of course they still can't catch up and we get that 'If we'd gotten on...would anything change?' I feel like the visuals let this moment down a little – the manga was more dynamic here – but Mamoru Miyano's voice acting almost makes up for it, with just a slight undercurrent of longing underneath the tone.

-'A different world?' Yes Yata, you would have seen a different world where an immortal man has an airship complete with its own Real Doll or whatever that thing Colorless was dancing with in S1 was. Maybe it's better they missed the airship.

-Another cut straight to Yata in front of Fushimi's house. Again this makes sense to cut everything before it to streamline things, but I'm sad to lose Aya's comments on Fushimi's family and the mention of him being home when the house got robbed.

-Precious sick baby Saru coughing as he works on what is clearly meant to be Yata's watch. Someone's already got a crush.

-We get the whole 'Yata taking care of sick Fushimi' part and I love everything this scene chooses to be, Fushimi is just so precious and confused as to why Yata's there taking care of him. Also huge props to Mamoru Miyano because the voice acting in this scene is adorable, every little 'Yataaa' makes my heart go doki doki.

-The last time Yata goes back to check on him and Fushimi is sitting up and looking so shocked and amazed because Yata came when he called and he's being loved and taken care of and no one has ever done that before someone hold me my heart can't take this.

-Yata makes Fushimi food and then falls asleep and it's all so wonderful and sweet gosh I hope a raging asshole doesn't show up to ruin it all.

-'Who are you?' One raging asshole, right on time.

-Niki's voice...isn't really what I was expecting? It's a bit deep in a way that I'm not sure works for me... I mean, he does sound like he needs to be punched in the face so that's spot on. As far as Nikis go though I think I give stage play Niki the edge as far as how I imagined him sounding.

-Niki threatens to stuff a mantis in Yata's mouth and we hear the sounds of poor sick baby Fushimi stumbling his way through the giant house as fast as he can go, likely falling over things and breathing hard and just terrified because he needs to get Yata away from his asshole trash king father now.

-And Fushimi absolutely screams at Niki to shut up and it's beautiful and painful and this entire scene just makes me want to kidnap him and save him from his terrible dad.

-Niki's laugh is just kinda there too, like anime!Niki doesn't quite manage that distinctive 'gyahaha' that stage play Niki did so well.

-Fushimi outside with Yata and again the voice acting is so good, that desperate little 'Yata!' and then the hesitant, stumbling attempts at thanking Yata when Fushimi's never thanked anyone before. My heart.

-Yata says he'll see Fushimi at school and Fushimi smiles and I just...precious baby. Must protect.

-Of course this beauty couldn't last forever and Fushimi's face falls as he has to go back inside to face the piece of unburnable trash sitting on the stairs. This is the one place Niki's voice 100% worked for me – that 'Saruhiko! Asoboze~' was just chilling.

-And we begin part two, with Yata and Fushimi hanging out on the street where they'll shortly meet Mikoto. Yata mom gets cheated out of not just a name but a cameo animated appearance too, why this Gora.

-They use a mix of old and new animation for this part – Yata drinking and then throwing the drink is clearly the exact animation from S1 but Mikoto catching it has been newly animated. That's probably for the best – the bigger eyes work well enough with Fushimi and Yata, since they're supposed to be kids, but there would be a pretty obvious difference between the old and new styles with Mikoto. (I think Mikoto looking back at them might be from S1 though...honestly this just makes me miss the S1 animation style again.)

-Cut to Fushimi getting yelled at for having his phone out in class. Fushimi of course gives no fucks and walks right out, and Yata runs after him while their teacher is completely done with this level of gay.

-I don't really like how those last two scenes went flow-wise, it feels kinda abrupt? The scene with Sarumi meeting Homra continues to feel shoved in and awkwardly out of place even in its own movie, and having nothing to really indicate the passing of time between Yata visiting Fushimi at his home to the two of them on the street and then back to class makes things feel choppy to me here. I assume they rearranged things from the novel for time reasons but it definitely feels shuffled around.

-Yata asks if Fushimi's going home and says he'll go too, and Fushimi has this little '...sorry' moment that's adorable, especially when Yata proceeds to put a hand on his shoulder and smiles and I think this movie is as in love with Yata as Fushimi is, every scene of him smiling is so bright.

-Yata mentions that they're third years already, finally giving some indication of how time moves in this movie thank you Yata.

-Fushimi pulls up jungle, showing Yata pictures that jungle's managed to take of various Homra members as part of a mission. I'm just concerned that someone is stalking Kusanagi.

-They discuss the rumors of the 'Red Monster' as images of Mikoto looking scary cross the screen. My favorite part of this is when they show Mikoto and the Homra members in silhouette with glowing red eyes looking all ominous, except one of the silhouettes is clearly Totsuka and I'm pretty sure the worst he's gonna do to you guys is ask if you want to help him with a hobby.

-We also get a close up of glowing eyes Fujishima. Did someone kick a dog in his presence, or...?

-Yata proposes to Fushimi talks about how they should get a place together and we get a quick flash of Niki looking like an asshole, which is his specialty. 'You don't need a home like that.'

-Yata says their place should have a helicopter pad and suddenly we're in Yata vision with an adorable cartoony plane rising up from a hidden door and just when you thought Yata couldn't be cuter.

-...Followed by Fushimi vision which is basically a mad science lab featuring human-like organisms in glowing pods. The chuunibyou is strong.

-The two of them walk off discussing plans and being in love as Aya stares down from the window, wondering why she's even in this movie again.

-Back to the Fushimi House of Shitty Parents, with Kisa making her cameo. Her character design is just way too....soft, I think, for my tastes. I feel like the manga did the better job of portraying a beautiful but cold and professional woman. Also she's got a hedgehog on her shoulder (or it's some kind of fluffy necklace thing, idk, it's weird why is it there why isn't she in her party dress like she should be).

-Her voice feels a little too pleasant for me too, though it does shift slightly colder when she gets off the phone and starts talking to Fushimi.

-Also while on the one hand the front of the house being wide and empty fits, since we know they don't keep anything valuable where people can see, the background here feels a bit...off? Like at one point we see these huge open doorways behind Fushimi and Kisa and it looks like they live in a fucking museum or something, like there's 'rich person's house' and 'no one actually has a house that looks like this.'

-Kisa tells Fushimi his dad is in the hospital and leaves, her cameo appearance over for the day. She still got more screentime than Yata's mom.

-Fushimi thinks about Niki's illness and then smiles and laughs, as we all should.

-Back to school, and Aya is pissed at Fushimi only being in 45th place in exams and that he isn't competing with her, because once again Fushimi gives no fucks he's moving in with his boyfriend and doesn't need no education.

-Aya mentions getting into Tsubakigahara high school and Fushimi cleans his glasses, reminding me that I wish we'd gotten to see Aya in her glasses animated.

-'Have you ever listened to me with your eyes sparkling and saying 'amazing'?' And Fushimi walks right past her because he doesn't want a rival, he wants someone who will look at him as he is and think that he's worth something, that he's amazing from the point of view beyond just what society expects.

-And Aya scores a direct hit with her backpack! Throwing things at people must run in the Fushimi family.

-Fushimi says he doesn't hate Aya and for a moment she stares at him with romance in her eyes....and then he kicks her backpack right back in her face. Such a smooth talker. At least they resisted the urge to put in another pantyshot there.

-Cut to the Sarumi Apartment of Love. The quick pan up the building makes it feel like they should be on the top floor even though we know from the novel it's a first floor apartment. Also the building looks a bit too fancy for me, considering their apartment's supposed to be cheap and purchased via an underworld-type realtor.

-Yata shows off his skateboard tricks and Fushimi is not interested. He's just playing hard to get again.

-Yata and Fushimi plan their attack on the surprise party and are so cute and hopeful and it's depressing knowing this is really the beginning of the end of their sense of invincibility.

-KNUCKLE BUMP!

-Also please note Fushimi's loft is big enough that Yata can like climb right up there with him and there's plenty of room for things like for example making out if the two of them wanted to do such things you know just saying.

-The night of the surprise party. Dewa and Chitose get to make appearances trying to disperse the crowd as Yata waits on top of the roof and Fushimi runs the computers while wearing a cute stripey blanket.

-They discuss the plan as tiny CGI people hang out around Homra. It looks like the bar is being attacked by rogue escapees from a Sims game (new plan: Yata leads them to the nearest pool and Fushimi removes the ladder).

-Fushimi is still wearing a stripey blanket on his head, and he is adorable. Just to make note of the important things.

-Fushimi begins the hacking mission as everyone puts on freaky-ass masks. Did Hisui have a coupon for the local freaky mask shop or something? Was this a wholesale deal?

-The jungle kids start shooting off party poppers. Sensing a threat to his bar counter, Kusanagi finally makes an appearance.

-Fushimi sends out a fake mail to indicate jungle's having server issues and we see Aya in the crowd, which makes you think her presence here is going to be important. Spoiler alert: unlike in the novel, her presence has no payoff and means nothing.

-Yata dons his own freaky mask and skateboards into the fray. His acting is slightly less bad than I expected it to be but Fushimi still facepalms over it.

-Fushimi's terminal sparks green and a tiny avatar appears in the corner. I think I liked the manga interpretation of Hisui's avatar guy better, there he was just a faceless completely unassuming avatar and here it's a little guy in a suit and glasses who looks more distinctive. I do like the way his voice is computerized but still obviously Hisui under it, which gets more pronounced the more he talks.

-At the end when the avatar goes all demony, I think this is another point for the manga which actually looked scary, businessman-avatar looks a bit more on the silly side. Though for Fushimi it was probably creepy either way (also it makes me wonder about Hisui on the other end of that transmission turning his avatar into a scary demon while his parrot eats his hair).

-Fushimi pulls the plug on his computer and then is off and running, yelling Yata's name over and over again, just so desperate to be sure Yata's all right.

-”Saruhiko!” “Misaki!” My heart.

-Yata drags Fushimi into a corner and Fushimi has that 'it's our—my loss' moment before they suddenly get attacked by party poppers again. One hits close to Fushimi's eye but it's just a random hit, which makes me wonder why they bothered even showing Aya before.

-I love Fushimi dragging Yata away here – he sounds just so harried, like here he's lost and he wasn't superior at all, and even worse he's put Misaki in danger and he just has no idea what to do.

-More fireworks come flying at them as Mikoto makes his grand appearance at last, in a giant ball of flame.

-I feel like the blocking of this scene was really weird, it seems like Fushimi and Yata should have been being swarmed by masked people but in order to save animation budget they just had random firecrackers flying around and then all of a sudden Saru's being dragged off by fangirls enemies. I wish it had been a little more frantic.

-Yata running towards Mikoto while yelling at him to save Saruhiko was perfect though, he's just so terrified for Fushimi's sake.

-I really loved the whole scene of Mikoto saving Fushimi, the way Fushimi looks up as the fire rains down and then Totsuka coming up behind him and holding him as lovely music plays, the atmosphere was so lovely (….though it kinda made me suddenly want some TotsuFushi. Just a little).

-Totsuka keeps hugging Fushimi, doing what we all wish we could.

-And we finally get a proper Sarumi hug! If nothing else at least the anime didn't punk out with a leg hug, we got a real hug this time.

-Fushimi and Yata head home in failure. Fushimi clenches his fist and you can see bruises on his fingers, my poor child.

-Back to the hospital where ding dong the dick is dead. The manga only implied that Kisa was a terrible mother who made her middle school age son collect his dead dad's body, the anime nicely confirms it by having her call Fushimi and tell him to do it.

-The manga was a little more abrupt and creepy with this scene, where Fushimi briefly sees Niki sitting up and mocking him. Even dead Niki is punchable.

-Also I like how even dead Niki's hair is perfectly styled. Are those bangs natural or what?

-Fushimi loses it and starts yelling at a corpse. It's almost like making your traumatized and abused middle schooler son retrieve his dad's dead body was a bad idea or something.

-A rubix cube falls from Niki's hand and--

-And--

-H E L P M E

-HE'S SO CUTE

-L O O K A T H I M

-HE HAS A TINY BOWTIE AND LITTLE NERD GLASSES LOOK AT HIS SMOL HANDS I LOVE HIM

-Only a true piece of utter trash could upset such a pure baby

-D I E

-Okay, things that aren't baby Saru, right, there's still movie left.

-Yata and Aya talk in the rain, I'm mostly distracted by how cute Yata looks in a poncho.

-It feels a little depressing that the last we see of Aya is her sobbing in the rain. I don't think the novel's resolution for her was the best either but at least there was something like closure.

-'The first King said take this hand. The second King said take this sword.' Fushimi voiceovers once again as Yata and Fushimi stand side by side in front of Mikoto at Bar Homra. They reach for Mikoto's flaming hands and...roll credits. Wait, roll credits?

-So yeah the entire back half of the novel isn't in the movie, it ends with Sarumi joining Homra. I wonder how this plays to people who haven't read the novel, because to me it very much feels like this is a narrative without an actual ending. I think they tried to make a parallel with the 'take this hand/take this sword' part but without the latter half of the novel the opening scene actually feels somewhat out of place to me, like it has no real relation to the rest of the movie (I almost feel like since they were messing with the novel anyway they should have started the movie with Yata and Fushimi reaching for Mikoto's hand, then backtracking to how we got to this point and finally jumping forward just as Fushimi's hand is about to take Mikoto's and suddenly have him reaching for the sword instead, looking to the side as Yata's phantom hand next to him fades away).

-I think they were in somewhat of a difficult position with LSW because the novel's too long for the movie they were making so some things had to be cut – and to be fair I have no idea how I would get the whole novel into a movie of this length either – but I can't deny it doesn't suffer for losing that back half. LSW is the story of how Yata and Fushimi met and then how they broke apart, and the movie to me feels like it's building towards a resolution that doesn't happen. In that sense starting the movie with the Homra installation rather than S4 might have worked better, restructuring the source material so it's more focused around how the two of them became friends and joined Homra with only the hovering specter of future betrayal at the end.

-Similarly, as far as dropped plot threads go, I liked seeing Aya animated but she feels somewhat... extraneous in the movie as it is. Her presence is mainly necessary for kickstarting the airship plot but as the movie stands that's it, and her arc feels rushed with a lot of pointless moments – having her be at the surprise party, for example, but not having her attack Fushimi and then cutting out the two of them speaking at Niki's funeral and Aya talking about being Fushimi's enemy, all of which ultimately makes her appearance there in the movie be without any real payoff. It also means her final interaction in the movie is with Yata rather than Fushimi, even though her character is more of a foil for Fushimi than Yata and her relationship with him more complex.

-Other things they cut I didn't like: no anthill? Seeing babu Saru with the rubix cube was fine enough and I do think the movie made it pretty clear that Fushimi was being abused, but the anthill is so essential to Fushimi's worldview that I feel losing it downplays some of his trauma a bit. As sad as poor upset Fushimi's face was when Niki destroyed the rubix cube it really doesn't carry the punch that this image does:

-Also this was a weakness in the novel too but once again, Yata gets really shafted by LSW. In the novel he at least has some presence in the first part of the novel but the movie completely removes everything about feeling left out of his family and even the part where he finds out his 'friends' hate him is a lot more downplayed than in the novel. A lot of what we see of Yata feels like it's from Fushimi's view, all those dazzling smiles, and it's wonderful from that perspective but I wish we'd gotten a little more of Yata's inner life here.

-On the good end, I am glad we at least got what we did of animated LSW. Middle school Yata is an utter gem of adorableness and I am so thankful to have him. The voice acting was also really great, Fukujun and Mamo knocked it out of the part (best in show probably goes to Mamo's 'Yataaa' during the scene where he's sick in bed, that was absolutely precious). Niki was complete trash in just the right way and I think the movie did a good job in conveying the dread and fear Fushimi feels towards him. If I had to rank adaptations I would probably put the anime last after the manga and the stage play but it's still a good watch and I'm looking forward to actually being able to, y'know, watch a nice legal stream with subs and then actually be able to buy it on disc some time in the next decade whenever Viz finally stops being jerks and give people who can't go running across the country to random cons on half a week's notice a chance to watch.

[justanalto]

quarantine tag game

i was tagged by @crazyrichfilipinos (hi and ty!) 

1. Are you staying home from work/school?

yup. no school, no temp assignments...just a big ole unemployment void. so this is what it’ll be like when i’m older. 

2. If you’re staying at home, who’s there with you?

the other three members of my family and the voices of everyone my mom calls on the daily. 

3. Do you have pets to keep you company?

no, and i really wish i had at least a hamster. a dog would be preferable. i’d even take a cat.

4. What do you miss the most?

i miss a lot of things. i think mainly i just miss having a sense of purpose? i got caught in the unemployment crossfire (without actually being able to file for unemployment welp) and everyone else in my house is learning online/working while i’m just kinda...floating around doing nothing. 

5. When was the last time you left your home?

march 14. i went to the gym and picked up some picture frames from ikea, and the next day began the stay-at-home advisory. the last time i physically left the house was about two weeks ago, when i went photographing, touched the ground and subsequently panicked about getting sick for the next week. (this was fueled by my mom’s reaction and i know she’s right but also still it’s a Lot)

6. What was the last thing you brought?

overcooked and overcooked 2 for steam baby! they were both on sale and i’ve just been playing with my friends. about to buy jackbox 5 tho cause it’s also on sale and might debut it at my possible zoom grad party.

7. Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed?

i have never been less relaxed because literally every anxiety is in play every single moment of the day

8. Are you a homebody?

i used to be! then i went to college and all that stuff. home is a great base to touch in on every now and again, but being home requires me to take up a specific role that i’m not comfortable being in for the rest of my life. i also fell in love with travelling, so...no, I guess? i’m a homebody in the sense that I enjoy quiet nights in. but other than that let me out of here please i’m begging you

9. What are movies you have watched recently?

PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE. THE GAY. oh! and saving face, because bitches can’t WAIT for the half of it! it’s me. i’m bitches. 

my ultimate goal is to work through the list of movies i want to watch (snowpiercer, parasite, knives out, to all the boys 2, etc.) and then work my way back through the movies i haven’t seen in a long time (princess diaries 1 + 2, all three Lilo and Stitches, camp rock)

10. An event that you were looking forward to that got cancelled?

just...everything. commencement ball. commencements parts I-IV. the acapella concerts I was supposed to see my friends at because it was their last hurrah. the conference where I was supposed to present the thesis project that stripped me of my mental health during my last semester of college! my friend and I were supposed to go see AJR in may. we were all supposed to throw grad parties. class of 2020 really got gypped y’all. the start of a marketing position i’d just secured with a temp company. 

11. What’s the worst thing you’ve had to cancel?

probably commencement. it was supposed to be a last hurrah with my friends because I wouldn’t have hung out with them since i left uni the semester before. our crowning achievement, if you will. the defining moment that said yes, despite every piece of drama and every bit of trauma along the way, we made it and we’re ready to fuck up the world. the crowning glory. and now all of that’s been stripped away and instead, society’s just going to throw us into the dry pool called the job market. commencement was supposed to be the breath of air before we went back to trying to swim against a current. now it’s just a continuous struggle that won’t be made better because no one can retire. plus the market, which is normally fucked for creatives, is going to be extra fucked because no company has ‘money’.  

12. What’s the best thing you’ve had to cancel?

uhhhh...i mean i guess when you put it that way, it would be the research conference. i was not ready to turn my brain back into academic mode. 

13. Do you have any new hobbies?

not new hobbies per se...just re-picked up a lot of old ones? knitting, writing, photography. folding stars. all sort of muscle memory things you can do while binge-watching TV. i’m in the process of making jars of little stars for my senior friends because they’re ‘senior stars’! cue ‘we’re all in this together’. 

but in all seriousness (and cheesiness, sorry guys) i wanted to make them something that was decorative and cute and reminded them that they were important. like stars. and just as like. a present. ‘cause they deserve that. 

14. What are you out of?

serotonin, dopamine and a will to live, almost. i’m so tired y’all.

15. What music are you listening too?

mostly my current music playlist, but i’m trolling my friends’ playlists too. i am repeating “complicated” from sex&drugs&rock&roll, though, mainly because i’m resonating with it so deeply to the point where i want to cry. and am unable to. as one does.

16. What shows are you watching?

a lot of the shows i watch ended production early so that’s really no more for grey’s...ok basically just grey’s ended early but i’m still watching 9-1-1 because they’re still producing regularly. b99 is too but I think they’re just about to wrap up. i’ve been meaning to start the recent season of odaat but i’ve just been watching the old episodes on netflix because idt we can get poptv. 

i started rewatching victorious, i’m at a pause with dynasty and sex&drugs&rock&roll mainly because of formatting. does anyone have any tv recs? 

17. What are you reading?

i’ve been meaning to start into the interior by michelle cliff, and after that i’d really like to re-read ‘i hate everyone but you’ by gaby dunn and allison raskin. i’d like more gay books tho.

18. What are you doing for self care?

watching a lot of the try guys. in the middle of trying to reset my sleeping clock tho.

19. Are you exercising?

i....am. mainly because not exercising makes me feel worse about myself and i can already sense the hell i’m going to catch if I don’t look good for my cousin’s wedding. (we’re gonna assume it happens.) 

20. How’s your toilet paper supply?

when we first started this whole thing, i looked in the basement and uh...let’s just say we’re gonna be pretty okay for a while. still hasn’t stopped me from monitoring my sheet usage though.

21. Have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine?

i cut my hair short just before quarantine, actually! so i’ve sort of been revelling in that. if this goes on for a while longer i might trim it myself, just because i would rather stay short than go long again for the sake of my own sanity. 

tagging: @agentmmayy @peacequack @lalalyds2 @the-writer-girl-nerd and anyone else that feels like doing this lovely quarantine tag or is slowly trying not to go insane

[skammovistarplus]

Culture and Translation - S01 E02 C04-C07 and SKAM+ Clip 1

Hi hi! Okay, so I’ve both gotten a bunch of followers and the tag is a lot more poppin since the last time I posted one of these. Quick explanation: when I got into og Skam, I felt I had to piece together a lot of the cultural context behind it, such as, yes, Russetiden, but also stuff like the cost of a bunad or sex without protection. I’ve also read from multiple Norwegian people that the fansubs didn’t do justice to the slang Skam characters use. So these posts provide cultural context. They also provide explanations for the translation I went with in the subs and the best approximation to the slang the Skam España characters use on the show in the cases where I felt the translation didn’t fully do justice to the actual dialogue.

Note: these posts are based on my own subs/translations, so they might not make as much sense if you hadn’t watched those.

Note 2: You can check the culture and translation tag for the rest of the posts.

CLIP 4: In which I learn that a dj system is not a mixer.

This clip was shot in the Pinar de Chamartín subway station. It’s the only station that connects another line with lines 1 and 4, and the show thanks Metro Ligero in the credits. Pinar de Chamartín is a Metro Ligero subway station. (There are several kinds, depending on which company manages the station.) They probably used this station because it’s big and doesn’t get a lot of commuters. Otherwise, it’s completely out of the way of anything these characters would go to.

Hola acosadora! (“Hi creeper!”): would be closer in meaning to, “hi, harasser!” (which doesn’t flow well in English) or “hi, stalker!” (but Eva uses the word in English right after). So creeper it is.

Dale duro (Subs: Hit it hard): I don’t really have any comment about this, other than it seems to be Lucas’ signature phrase. He’s always saying it.

La gente se cree que hacen una movida los DJs que flipas (“People think DJs are some kind of crazy wizards”) Holy shit, I had so much trouble with this sentence. I wish I knew whether this line was on the original script or if Jorge’s actor reworded it. As per the FormulaTV article, the actors get to reword lines if they think it’d sound more natural some other way. Alas, I couldn’t think of how to translate “movida” in this context (it comes up again later), so I settled for the line in the subs. Let’s just say that the implication is that DJs are almost unknowable in their mad DJ skillz, what with the “movida” and the verb “flipar” that we’ve seen so often at this point. I find my translation much inferior to Jorge’s line, which provides such a vivid visual and is hilarious.

Hablando de punchi punchi (“Speaking of sick beats”): Jorge obviously doesn’t say sick beats, but he’s trying for an onomatopoeia for the beat in dance songs. There are a lot of variants in Spanish for this specific purpose of talking about the beat in a song. Another popular one is, “chunda chunda.”  I’m actually really proud of how I translated this line, lol. Too bad I can’t put it on a resume.

“¿Te renta?” is another idiom that often comes up on Skam España. I’ve been told it’s Madrileño slang, but I’ve personally never used it or heard it before the show. (Which doesn’t mean it’s not in use, lol, just that it hasn’t made its way to me yet.) A literal translation would be, “Is it worth it?” Jorge asks Lucas whether it’d be worth it to Lucas to do something this weekend, and Lucas responds going out for beers would be worth it to him. In this case, I didn’t go for the literal translation as this scene is already too long and involved to be throwing more idioms into the mix. Other times, I’ve translated it as is, because I do feel it sums Madrileños up well. Like, we can’t be bothered to do anything or go anywhere if we don’t feel it’s worth it.

Keli (“House”): This has been Madrileño slang for decades at this point. It just means house.

Sí, movidas, ya sabes (“Yeah, shit, you know”): “Movidas” comes up again, this time in the context of Lucas’ home life. Basically, there’s trouble, but the use of “movidas” implies movement, i.e. it’s an active, ongoing situation.

Tengo un programita (“I have some ‘wares”): The literal translation is, “I have a little software,” but I remembered downloading completely legal software from sketchy websites, which would call them ‘warez.’ I thought this phrasing would be more vivid for English speakers. Also, there’s really nothing about Jorge’s persona that suggests this software would’ve been obtained legally, so yeah.

It’s unclear what part of what Eva is saying Jorge reacts to when he says, “Fuck…” Personally, I think he’s impressed that Eva has scammed a rich dude out of an invite to that huge-ass house. But it could also be that he’s proud she’s making plans with the girl squad! Either way, he’s impressed!

Pico, pala, pico, pala (“Joke, flirt, joke, flirt”): OKAY. So, the literal translation of this is, “Pick, shovel, pick, shovel.” This is fairly common Spanish slang for the process of flirting with a girl until she is won over, or she is less reluctant to flirt back. Visually, it makes you think of a miner having to put in long hours of exhausting physical work in order to get results. It makes it sound like more scummy than it is, kind of? I translated it as “joke, flirt, joke, flirt,” because that’s what it usually amounts to. As we’ve seen from Jorge, he does voices, gives odd nicknames and generally aims to be cute in a cheesy way. That is the kind of techniques that are meant to win a girl over, or at least get her to joke along with you.

One more objectionable maneuver, which would still fall under the umbrella of pick and shovel, would be Cristian’s “my DMs aren’t working” move to get Eva to give him her cellphone number.

Final lines from the clip that didn’t make it to the episode:

Eva: But, okay, no. Save up or ask your parents to get it for your b-day, no?

Jorge: Nah, maybe I’ll just get one secondhand.

Lucas: And you lend it to me.

Jorge: Okay.

Lucas: But you can’t… [cuts off]

I love the way all the dj system talk ended up having no impact whatsoever on the plot. It’s not like I had to look specific terms or anything.

CLIP 5: The girl squad chooses an impractical, yet picturesque, meeting point

Eva is waiting right outside Tribunal subway station. I’ve met up with friends at this station probably since I was allowed to hang out on my own, lol.

You can barely make out a building behind the girls. It’s this one: Museum of History of Madrid. Entrance is free, and it has tons of cool stuff to check out.

The girls have a quick chat on how they’ve dressed up for Cristian’s party. Cris says it was about time they had a chance to dress up. Nora says she put on one of her daily outfits, but the girls don’t buy it and tease her over it. Honestly, she doesn’t look overdressed at all? She wore an actual dress for New Year’s Eve.

Maripili! (“Maripili!”): Maripili is a name, which Nora randomly uses to call Viri over. It doesn’t seem to be a meme, so I think Nora is just teasing Viri with a name that sounds dated and cutesy. It’s very gentle teasing though.

Al chino (“To the convenience store”): Eva instructs the girls to go to “el chino,”  which is slang for a type of convenience store owned by immigrants. These are usually Chinese immigrants, hence the name, but stores owned by Maghrebi and Latinx immigrants are also fairly common. The name “chino” has stuck regardless. These convenience stores sell a small range of foodstuffs, such as canned food, microwavable food, some fruit and vegetables, ice cream, bread, and, as the scene implies, booze. They also remain open longer than most grocery store chains, often until 23:30 on a weekday and way past midnight on Fridays and Saturdays. They’re not allowed to sell alcohol to minors, but I guess they don’t mind breaking the law? I don’t know, guys, we got older students to buy us booze lol.

Que me acaba de dar un cringe (“I just cringed a lot”): “Cringe” is an English loanword, which is obviously the word cringe.

Tú la que más, tú la que más (“You’re partying the hardest, you are”): The literal translation is: “You’re the most, you’re the most.” It’s implied that whichever girl is “you” (it’s the singular form, so Cris doesn’t mean all of the girls) is doing something the most, but the sentence doesn’t have a verb. Basically, it’s a way of hyping themselves up for the party. I assumed Cris meant “partying” from context, but it’s not explicit.

In the episode, clip 5 became two different clips to account for the train ride. That’s why there’s a timestamp in the middle of the clip when you watch the episode version.

Cristián lives in Pozuelo de Alarcón, an affluent Madrid suburb with its own city hall. At the time, twitter commentary from Spanish viewers was critical of the show choosing to make the girls meet in Tribunal, because public transit from Tribunal to Pozuelo takes too many connections and it’s not like Madrid isn’t rife with convenience stores. I included both the route the girls take, and an alternate for ur edification.

I just realized that when Viri goes over to greet Lara, you can clearly hear Lara saying, “what’s up, dude?” in response.

And also, when Eva begs Nora not to leave her alone, Nora teases Eva by saying the sentence back to her. That’s why Eva laughs and says Nora is being dumb.

A saco (“going all out”): “A saco” is that kind of slang that’s hard to translate, but Eva means that Viri is assertively taking the lead in pursuing (and making it clear she wants to make out with) ALEJANDRO, rather than waiting for him to notice her.

CLIP 6: Viri lost a battle, but she didn’t lose the war!  

Nora’s ringtone is so… She truly leaves me speechless sometimes.

No soy celoso (“I’m not possessive”): I translated “celoso” as possessive, because if I translated it as “jealous” it would mean that Cristian, right this moment, doesn’t feel jealous of Jorge. In fact, what Cristian is saying that this is a general personality trait of his, like being blond. He is totally chill with any and all girls he is interested in having boyfriends. That’s not at all an obstacle!

It’s also a very corny thing Spanish guys say all the time when a girl says she’s taken, hence Eva’s uncomfortable smile in response.

As Inés and Alicia greet ALEJANDRO, he seems pretty annoyed by Viri floating around him, clearly laying a claim on him. The three of them intentionally crowd Viri out.

CLIP 7: Hard work pays off

En doce siglos (“in twelve centuries”): This is Amira’s catchphrase for measuring time. She also uses it during the truth or dare game.

One of the season 1 mysteries: what did Alicia say to Inés to make her leave so quickly? In hindsight, it doesn’t seem to have anything to do with Jorge, but that was one of the popular theories at the time.

Another detail: Cristian is behind Inés, seemingly on her side of this girl fight. ALEJANDRO’s crew seems to be pretty friendly with Inés and Alicia. They celebrated Inés’ birthday together, and often post ig stories together.

Social media:

I already mentioned this in a post, but Cris’ instagram makes it very obvious that Cris is a stoner. Her rainbow tops are peak Spanish stoner girl fashion, the soap video she regrammed is the sort of thing a stoner would be fascinated by, she follows ifyouhigh and highpeopledoingstuff, and she’s holding a blunt for her first ever ig pic. So yeah. I also just realized the implications, seeing she’s the s2 main. I don’t think she’ll lose a bunch of weed, but she might smoke it with 🐸?

“Perezón,” i.e. the title of clip 4, would literally translate to sloth or laziness, but its actual meaning is “what a drag,” as in “that party/those people/going to that rally is such a drag.”

Viri’s house is pretty basic-looking. What we can see of it looks like a working class household, but it isn’t the borderline hoarder situation in Vilde’s clip.

Eva watches an 11-episode show, which may or may not be Skam s1. The fun thing is she promises she won’t watch episode 12. The NYE special is listed as episode12 on the Movistar site.

Jorge got ahold of a charger after midnight!  

SKAM+ #1:

This clip takes place between episode 2 clips 6 and 7. Specifically, 20 minutes before the last clip.

Aitana is a Spanish singer born in 1999. She became famous thanks to talent show Operación Triunfo, where she came in second. At the time season 1 aired, she had only dropped two songs, Lo Malo with Ana Guerra, and Teléfono. Both of these songs played a prominent role on the show.

Cristian’s dad works at a record label! Explains Cristian’s huge ass house and mixing room!

ALEJANDRO asks Aitana where she’d like to hang out with him at Retiro Park. Retiro Park is one of the largest parks in Madrid. The park belonged to the Spanish Monarchy until the late 19th century, when it became a public park. It’s one of the most picturesque sights in the city and it’s overrun by people. So I don’t think it’s the place you want to take a celeb on a low-key date, but otherwise, good choice! Almost makes it seem like ALEJANDRO isn’t after sex!

Hasta yo preferiría a Aitana (“Even I’d rather Aitana”): That is… so lesbian of Viri.

Speaking of lesbians, Cris is also absolutely overcome by Aitana’s beauty.

In case you weren’t aware, Spaniards greet each other with two cheek kisses when we meet someone. Touching people’s hair without their permission, though, is still a no-no.  

[velkynkarma]

End of Year Fic Meme

Better late than never, right? Keeping Parasite Knight posting on a daily basis was kind of exhausting so I didn’t have a chance to fill this out at the start of the year. Now I have time!

Thanks @maychorian for tagging me, sorry it took so long to get to it.

Stats:

List of Fics Posted:

Identity Crisis (38,460 words) (Young Justice, multi-chapter adventure team fic, complete) Routine Maintenance (50,777 words) (Voltron, multi-chapter, Shiro-centric with team features, complete) The Nature of Leadership (10,837 words) (Voltron, one-shot, Shiro-centric) Road Trip to End Times (12,649 words) (Voltron, multi-chapter, AU, paladin-centric, still ongoing)

Bonus: Parasite Knight (86,840 words) (Voltron, multi-chapter, Shiro-centric, complete) (was 100% written in 2016 but not posted until 2017)

Plus an assorted 5,636 words of notes for future stories

Total number: 4 (5 with Parasite Knight) Total Word count: 112,723 published in 2016 199,563 including Parasite Knight

Ship/Character Breakdown: No actual ships. All gen. Character focus: Robin/Dick Grayson 1, Shiro 2 (3 with Parasite Knight). But, RM, PK and Road Trip all have character focus on the whole Voltron team, so…not sure how to count that.

Do I favor Shiro? Yes, maybe a little bit, ahahaha.

Specifics:

Best/worst title?

Best title: I’m really partial to Routine Maintenance, even if the name doesn’t fit all the chapters particularly well. I also really like Parasite Knight because I struggled to come up with a title for that one, and that popped into my head. It was both fitting on multiple levels and it rhymed. ALSO it meant I got to call my writing file “Parasite Write” and I’m not gonna lie that really entertained me for stupid reasons. 

 Worst title: Road Trip to End Times. Titles are super hard for me to come up with and I was kind of in a rush to get the first of the prompts I’d written posted, so I just kinda took whatever first came to mind and slapped it in there. 


Best/worst first line?

 Best: “Shiro can’t put this off any longer.” ~The Nature of Leadership 
I kinda like that it immediately leaves you wondering, ‘wait, WHAT can’t he put off any longer?’ It’s a hook that means you gotta keep reading.

Worst: “It’s a miserable, exhausted, sweaty, mud-coated team of paladins that Shiro leads back to the Castle of Lions, after three days of trekking through the swamp-infested lands of the planet Ssagessh.” ~Routine Maintenance

This was my debut fic so I was still getting a feel for the fandom. I knew I had ideas that people would probably like, but I was a little worried that the first chapter I had chosen to start off with might not attract a lot of attention. It’s not a terrible opening but it had a kind of weak beginning.

Best/worst last line?

Best: “And, for the first time in a very long time, he feels surprisingly at peace.” ~Routine Maintenance Kind of funny that it gets the best last line but the worst first line. I really liked how the entire fic I was exploring Shiro’s difficulties and how frustrated he just was with his arm, and then finally I gave him a little peace at the end. It worked really well into the overall theme and I was really happy with the way this wrapped everything up, even if it was all individual scenarios and not one full fic. Worst: “He had a scientist to meet tonight, and it was an appointment he just couldn’t miss.” ~Identity Crisis I don’t really HATE this line per se, but it does require the context of the rest of the story to really make sense. Also, the entire last scene is completely unrelated to the main characters who had been the focus for the rest of the fic. I did it on purpose to replicate the way Young Justice episodes typically ended, but it also meant the character closure finished early, so this end didn’t have as much ZING as it probably could have.

General questions:

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted? Honestly I hadn’t expected to write much of anything this year. I did Identity Crisis right at the beginning for a fanfic contest a friend of mine was throwing, but after that I just hadn’t gotten much of a creative spark out of anything. Most of the fandoms I’d been in were pretty dead or getting there. Or, in the case of Batman, alive but not something I really felt like writing for. I am genuinely shocked that I managed to kick out 161,103 words in the span of 3 months. That’s insane. What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year? Voltron. Hands down. I watched Voltron on a whim when I needed something to motivate me through a massive art project. I used it just to give myself a goal after reaching a specific workload, since I’d run out of fic in my fandoms to use instead. I was not expecting it to be all that impressive, I just needed something to fill my breaktimes with. How impressive could a show based on a silly 80’s cartoon about combining five robot space cats into a giant robot guy be? I was not expecting to fall in love with it. After that I loved the show, and checked out the fandom. Again, this is often a killer for me as a fandom might not produce the stuff I’m interested in, or the writers just aren’t very good. Happily for me I stumbled across @maychorian ‘s Boom Crash almost immediately upon searching in the fandom and was like ‘shit, people in this fandom can WRITE’ and decided to stick around and lurk a little more. Honestly I only ever intended to lurk. I never intended to write for it. But then something just…happened and I thought of some ideas that eventually turned into Routine Maintenance, and then people really liked it and I felt like writing more, and…well. Here I am.

What’s your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.

I am really really REALLY fond of Parasite Knight and I was long before it was posted, so I’m gonna count it here, since it had 0 feedback/kudos/comments/reviews/etc in 2016. It was difficult to write in some cases, partly because it’s so intense a lot and that’s hard to keep up sometimes, and partly because it got WAY longer than it was ever intended to be. Originally it was conceived as a (fairly large) oneshot, but I kept coming up with more and more ideas and details that I liked too much to get rid of, and then it turned into an 86K monstrosity. Also this one was a little therapeutic in some areas (particularly at the end), since it dug into some less than comfortable areas of my own head-space. It was a bit uncomfortable to write some of the later chapters at first, but once they were finished I felt a lot better for it. So yeah. PK is kind of special to me.

Okay, NOW your most popular story. It’s a little hard to judge but I think this one is Routine Maintenance. It definitely has the most kudos, and has the highest comments-to-chapter ratio. Story most underappreciated by the universe? Road Trip to End Times has comparatively little focus compared to the rest of my stuff. I don’t really find it surprising though since it’s a zombie AU and that’s not everyone’s cup of tea. Story that could have been better? Honestly I was pretty satisfied with everything I wrote this year. Some parts of some stories could have been tweaked a little but I didn’t think any one fic had an overall major failing.

Sexiest story? lol sexiness in my stories that’s a good joke Saddest story? Nature of Leadership does pull at the heartstrings a little. Parasite Knight is also pretty agonizing through a lot of parts. Most fun? Routine Maintenance! It was really relaxing to just do individual pieces without having to sew a whole plot together. There was definitely a theme through the whole fic, but it was really nice to not have to worry about plot-holes and things. I was able to just write and I kicked out like a chapter a day because it was all self-contained. Plus I got to play with all kinds of different scenarios. It was fun. Story with single sweetest moment? There was some H/C in Parasite Knight that I really enjoyed writing, but I’m not sure if it’s sweet exactly since Shiro was still suffering (or only partly aware) through a lot of it. I guess if I had to pick something sweeter, either Ghost or Weight from Routine Maintenance. Both center around Shiro getting relief from his prosthetic-induced pain and he’s so genuinely shocked about it but so grateful. Hardest story to write? Parasite Knight. As stated above, it was hella long, it really got away from me, and there were some gritty parts that were difficult to write for personal reasons. Don’t regret it for a second though. Easiest/most fun story to write? Routine Maintenance. See above. Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters? Parasite Knight helped me get into all of the paladins’ heads better since I had to write out their core traits in quintessence form. That was an interesting character study that made me really pull apart what their defining traits were, versus their extraneous traits (ex. Hunk’s reliability/kindness being a core trait, while his goofiness or love of food are extra traits that are a part of him but don’t define his soul). It was a challenge but fun. Most overdue story? None, really. I don’t post anything until it’s fully written, so nothing can really be overdue since half the time nobody knows it’s due. Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? Kinda! Half writing risk, half social risk. After Routine Maintenance finished posting I hadn’t really intended to write more, but then @bosstoaster  commented on it. I was at work when I got the notification and had to literally leave my desk to keep from screaming in delight around all my coworkers, haha. Since I was a veritable Voltron n00b to the fandom I was blown away that one of the gen bigshots even noticed me. But I knew BT also did prompts, and I was like, “Okay, but I know BT also enjoyed my writing, so…maybe I could propose a fic trade?” So I offered to do a fic trade with BT, because I kinda also wanted to write more but didn’t have any ideas at the time, and also wanted to try prompts, which I needed more practice on. I think it turned out really well in the end and The Nature of Leadership was written. It was also a challenge for me because I had to take a prompt I hadn’t decided on and make it work, but I like that it made me think outside the box a little. What are your fic writing goals for next year?

Let’s see…


Just keep writing. Focus more on steady writing and not burst writing.


Try not to get hung up on details as much. I know this is a thing I’m most known for, but it’s also responsible for slowing me down or killing ideas/writing momentum completely, because I have to come up with a reason for everything even if it’s never shown. Have to learn to just loosen up and write sometimes, I don’t have to justify every detail.

Maybe try more prompts? Might help with the above goal.

Try to write shorter stuff. (HAH. Operative word here being ‘try’)

That was fun! Eeeeven if it was me basically talking about the same 4 fics over and over again lol.

[skammovistarplus]

Culture and Translation - S01E09

SKAM+ Clip 4 will get its own post because it’s a fairly long clip and also really dense in terms of content. For now, let’s all marvel as Eva’s life goes fantastically off the rails. 

CLIP 1: “Now I have really shit the bed,” Eva says. But that bed will be further soiled soon.

Yo soy Lara y le parto la cara, pero mucho más. Se ha quedado corta (“If I was Lara I’d smash her face harder. I mean, that wasn’t enough”): “Partir la cara” literally means to “break Eva’s face in half,” like you would with a cinder block if you were a martial artist. “Quedarse corta” means that, in the speaker’s opinion, Lara didn’t go far enough and further violence would’ve been socially appropriate in order to make things even between Lara and Eva.

La sueltita (“the trollop”): “Sueltita” literally means “loose,” but the suffix “-ita” makes it a diminutive. So the speaker is calling Eva “loosey,” if that were something you’d say in English.

Ahora sí que la he cagado bien (“now I have really shit the bed”): The literal translation would be something like, “Now I have really shat it out but good.” Don’t mind me, I just enjoy every instance of poop-related language.

El mierda seca que lo ha soltado todo (“the shitstain who ran their mouth”): “Mierdaseca” is literally dry turd, lol. So the literal translation is, “The dry turd who let it all out.”

CLIP 2: Shitting the bed, pt. II

It’s really hard to make out what the boys are saying in this scene. Lucas does say that they (presumably his parents) “están hasta los cojones.” As I’ve mentioned before, “cojones” is the rudest way you could talk about somebody’s balls. It is a lot ruder than saying “balls” in English, but there’s no real good equivalent in American English.

¿Te crees que soy gilipollas? (“Do you think I’m a moron?”): “Gilipollas” is a dual purpose swear word in Spanish. It can either mean “asshole” or someone so dumb that it’s a wonder they can walk and breathe at the same time. It is not ableist language, it has never been a scientific term for people with intellectual disabilities.  

¡Yo no he dicho una puta mierda! (“I haven’t said shit!”): More specifically, Lucas says he hasn’t said “fucking shit.” 😂

Es que me parece flipante (“I’m tweaking out”): Again, Eva uses “flipante,” which is the adjective form of “flipar” (to trip, in a drug sense). Since Eva is having all these (completely wrong) epiphanies right now, I thought I’d do her one better and phrased it as “tweaking out.”

¡Es que me la suda! (“I don’t give a shit!”): Okay, so when Spaniards really, really don’t care about something, we say that whatever it is we don’t care about “me suda la polla” or “me suda el coño.” This literally means that thing you don’t care about is… sweat dripping down your dick, or your pussy, depending. So. Yeah. That’s how little Lucas now cares about Eva’s opinion of him. Sweat off his dick. For the record, yes, this is a fairly rude thing to say, but as you might’ve gathered from these posts, and just from watching Skam España… We use this idiom on the daily. It’s shocking coming from Lucas, but only because he uses it as a Precision F-Strike, not because it’s any stronger than the way the characters usually speak.

CLIP 3: Squad no longer

¿Esto no sera verdad? (“This can’t be true?”): So, right away, Viri has a belligerent tone, and also asks Eva this question. The literal translation is, “This isn’t going to be true?” As in, “this had better not be true, sis.” So Viri puts Eva on the spot with her opening line.

I think the Skam España crew should’ve waited a little longer before shooting this scene, lol. Unless Viri was tagged on one of the pics, there is no fucking way she’d have seen the hate ig unless she was present when it was created. It’s only been three minutes since the pictures were posted.

Ya son ganas de meter mierda (“You really have to be a shit stirrer to pull this”): A more literal translation would be, “You gotta be eager to shit stir.” I reworked it so the meaning came across more clearly.

So I guess a good question is, is what the girls did and said in this clip true to Spanish teens? I think that’s a very complicated question, but worth asking. Obviously, it depends on the person. Viri has her own character arc that we’ll deal with through subsequent posts. When it comes to Amira and Cris, though, my take is this. Spaniards will go hard for a friend. Amira and Cris have needed to be held back from telling Inés what’s what, if not outright fighting her. But, if you go so hard for a friend, you expect reciprocity. You don’t expect to have the rug pulled from under your feet, which is the way Amira and Cris feel. If Eva had told them about her history with Inés beforehand, there’s a chance they’d have told Inés to get over it and fuck off. Eva just didn’t give them the chance to process the info and then make the choice to defend her.

CLIP 4: We’ve reached peak Youth’s Daughter

It took me a while to decide whether I wanted to use “copying” or “cheating,” and it was a total waste of time, because I clearly should��ve gone for “cheating” and not “copying.”

How many remakes have used Youth’s Daughter at this point? It’s even on the soundtrack of the movie Lisa Teige starred in, Battle. Hopefully the remakes avoid song fatigue in the future, although some artists, such as Billie Eilish, Troye Sivan or Mona Haydar, seem almost compulsory.

CLIP 5: Puns are a translator’s nightmare

After squinting at Eva’s exam for a good while, I feel pretty confident about saying that the high school is named after Margarita Manso. Margarita Manso was a painter and general eschewer of rules. It’s worth noting that she was close friends with Federico García Lorca, who was killed by fascists during the Spanish civil war. García Lorca stood accused of being a socialist, a freemason and a homosexual, and was executed. His body has never been found. However, Margarita Manso also married a fascist, Alfonso Ponce de León, who was himself executed by the faction supporting the government. Here’s a pic of Margarita:

No, that’s not the actual name of the high school where they shoot the show. As mentioned elsewhere, Spanish fans can be very intense and it’s in the cast’s best interests to avoid a Nissen situation.

Lucas was not done with that exam, lol. And Eva wasn’t even close to finished, yikes.

Nora sings Lo Malo to Eva. Lo Malo was written by Brisa Fenoy and performed by Aitana (again!) and Ana Guerra. Since the lyrics are a key element of the scene, they’re included in the subs. I just want to explain some of the puns in the lyrics.

Tira porque te toca a ti perder (“Roll because it’s your turn to lose”): “Tira,” in this context, would mean “get out of my face,” but also, “roll the dice.” So, roll the dice because now it’s your turn to lose, but also, get out of my face, I’m over your shit. I hope “roll” helped convey both meanings.

Tiro porque me toca a mí otra vez (“I roll because it’s my turn again”): Another pun about rolling dice. I’m rolling the dice, because I got a second roll of the dice, but also, I’m leaving because I got rid of you, and this time it’s about me.

Pero si me toca, toca, tócame (“But if it’s my turn, touch-a, touch me”): “Toca” can also have several meanings. In this case, it can either mean that it’s my turn (“me toca”) or begging to be touched/stroked/caressed (“tócame”).

As for whether Lo Malo fits the role Baby played in the original… First off, I have to say that William, in that scene, is styled to look like Baby-era Justin Bieber, what with the hood pulled up. Julie Andem is making a connection between the music Noora is embarrassed to listen to, and the boy Noora is ashamed to find hot. There’s nothing embarrassing about liking Aitana and Ana Guerra as artists, per se, other than they got their start at a talent show and dueted on this song because they were contractually obligated to do so. That said, the lyrics fit Nora and Alejandro thematically and, on top of that, the song was really. Seriously. Incredibly. Overplayed in Spain in the summer of 2018, much like Baby was in its time.

Lo llevo muy jodido (“I have a fucking F in it”): I fought with this line so hard, and even as the episode was rendering, I knew I would regret my choice. Alejandro is also making a pun. He says he’s been consistently getting bad grades in English, but he also means that all his efforts to hook up with Nora have failed. There isn’t really a good translation for his line, but if we ever fix our subs, I’d go with, “I’m fucked, if I keep this up.” Or something akin to that!

CLIP 6: Queen Lara

“Hey, dude, give me a sip.” Why did I sub this line? Because it was oddly clear, and it just… seemed like I should… 😬

Tú sabrás el rollo que te llevas con tu novio (“Whatever deal you have with your boyfriend, that’s up to you”): This is one of those lines that took me a while to settle on a translation for. I’m happy with the line, but I’ll expand on what Lara means. She means to say that Eva’s relationship with Jorge is not Lara’s business. When it comes to the part that affects Lara, she doesn’t blame Eva, and fully blames Cristian. Whatever led Eva to kiss Cristian, and whether that’s something Jorge is cool with or isn’t, Lara thinks it’s not her place to judge or speak about.

I think it’s kinda funny that the fandom is chill with Lara reading Cristian’s texts and not regretting doing so, despite the show making it clear that’s not kosher, but thinks Viri is an asshole for posting the Cristian/rando pic (which the show also looked down on when it was the hate ig doing it, to be clear).

CLIP 7: Kicking Eva when she’s down

You don’t know how much I want to know where those stairs are.

Y habíamos quedado (“And you were supposed to come to the party”): Eva says she and Jorge “habían quedado,” which as I explained last post, means they had arranged to meet. In this case, they had arranged that both Eva and Jorge would party at Nora’s. So, not the exact translation, but the best option, given how vague the original sentence is.

Si Quieres Volver by El Imperio del Perro is the song which closes the clip and plays over the credits. I translated the lyrics that are used on the show:

You should understand That I’m in deep shit Any decision Smells bad where I stand

And now I’ll carry The shame on my back And I’ll be yet another person Who’ll apologize wordlessly

Tell me if you want to get back together (5x)

It’s so simple To ruin everything And watch as it burns

Something forces me to go on and Enjoy when it leaves I felt the need To jump in the well There was something else, I couldn’t see it

Tell me if you want to get back together (10x)

Social media:

Some people watch Skam and the remakes without keeping up with the social media aspect of the show. In general, I feel like you can watch Skam without the social media, and not miss anything of importance. But if you watch Skam España season 1 without the social media, you’ll miss a couple important details.

First, while the show was airing, the hate account felt inescapable. It updated very often and at random times, so that the real-time viewer first felt shocked, then tired, then massively over it. Someone who comes into the show late, needs to know that we would sometimes get excited because there was an update, but oh. It was yet more abuse.

Second, a viewer who watches the season without the social media, misses the actual chain of events, which is as follows:

Viri shares the following pic with Inés privately at some point during the week:

Clip 7 drops at 20:40.

Inés uploads the pic to her insta stories at 20:43.

By 20:45, the instagram profile @eva_la_z0rra or @eva_the s1ut, has taken the picture from Inés’ ig stories and cropped it, so that Eva and Cristian are the focus of the pic.

As a sidenote, Inés captions the pic like so: “wow, alex and alba came out cute… 🙊” Álex and Alba are Lucas’ and Eva’s actors’ real names.