#oh what i would give to be a digital animal who doesn't have to pay taxes or go to college

[pikatie]

slow evenings in the city <3

[bonnymori]

01 | 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫... 𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭?!

chapter 01 / chapter 02 / chapter 03

Word count: 1250+

Synopsis: During a particularly boring afternoon, a muscly man with a purple worm around his shoulders has made his way onto your house- literally, smashing through your window- and, subconciously, onto your life.

Contents/Warnings: (1) Fushiguro Toji x gn!Reader, theres also Gojo cat as your cat!! (2) Reader finds Toji's worm cute; i'm sorry if you don't just skip that part (3) There's some cursing but I promise next chapter won't

A/N: I have a lot of drafts and this is the most normal looking I've got... so let's post it first ehehehhsjhd- Also, I'm remaking the structure of the posts (Megumi's one-shot is updated with the very same visual as this!), hope it looks less unorganized! Thank you for reading <3

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To think you'd let such a stranger barge into your apartment- actually, you would never imagine such a comeup. But here are we.

Right in front of you there is a man. Raven locks, black shirt, white baggy pants - is that a purple... gut, intestine thing around his chest? - and a pair of imacculate ballet shoes on his feet. The dude is knocked out cold, it seems that he barely made it through your window, only to come head first against your floor tiles. Now you have drops of blood all over the floor and counter- and, a bleeding man.

You can't tell which task will be more grueling to solve.

Because you have a working brain, of course the man comes first. No matter if your window is broken, and a handfull of glass shards adorn your countertops. And now you've accidentally stepped upon one- just then you realise the man's back must be feeling like a bed of thors- or shards, over being dragged through the floor.

So you throw his arms - which you notice, has a few cuts here and there - over your shoulders, and picks him up in a one-person carry; barely, his torso is against yours and legs are dangling on the floor, this guy must weigh the double you do. It feels like you're carrying a fridge.

From your peripheral, you can see Satoru paddle to the kitchen's doorframe, probably wondering if you were preparing a meal for him or whatever.

"I'll be back in a moment, Ru." He meows a reply, dragging his mountain of fluff back to your couch- you're certain he's taking your spot, while it's still warm.

Thankfully, it doesn't take long for you to reach the bathroom, dropping the man leisurely upon your fluffy mat. Beside all the cuts, the man has already a plentiful share of permanent scars, and none are of your business, you don't care. It's like cleaning and stitching up a old doll full of tears, by the way you're able to maneuver his limbs; you're glad he's still unconscious.

But the thing around his shoulders is not.

In a blink of eye, it jumps from his shoulder to yours, attaching itself to your back and nestling upon your shoulder. When you glance down at it, it feels like a weird looking parrot.

"Hi?" You ask, it looks back at you. "Are you like, his pet or something?" It doesn't talk, just gazes at you through half lidded eyes; so you give up on short talking it, not knowing what you expected yourself. "Let's go finish my movie then!"

You join Satoru on the couch, the cat rapidly making room on your comfortable lap; and the man forgotten, snoring soundly on your bathroom.

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A sequel and half movie later, you hear a loud thud coming from the kitchen. Even though you're aware there's a strange in your house- the sudden sound still naturaly jolts you out of your seat.

"UGH- Goddamn it-" Next comes a colorful list of slurs; a sigh makes way out of your mouth.

You round the corner, pointing a accusing finger to the strange man, who's laying on your floor again. "No cussing on my house."

"Why didn't you even clean this floor, it's loaded with glass shards."

"I wanted to finish my movie afternoon before doing so. Besides, what made you smash through there," You point to the ruined window. "to here." Then, to the kitchen floor. And finally, motioning to your whole apartment.

That was a interesting question, he expected a "Who are you?" or "I'm calling the cops!" call.

"I don't need to explain you shit."

"Think of it as an retribution, since I patched you up, answer my question."

"No."

"That, or you'll pay for my window."

A sigh. "Fine. I was being chased."

"You're a criminal, then?" You questioned.

"Yes." A devilish grin made its way to his face, showing canines and stretching the small scar on the corner of his mouth.

"Alright, just don't get me involved then."

Toji is familiar to that sort of outcome. Sometimes people man up, people weaker than him. But he knows he's intimidating, and he absolutely loves to play with the attitude of those who challenge him.

Forgetting the shart carving on the sole of his feet, he walks up to you efortlessly, towering over your frame.

"Well, are you not scared to have a criminal inside your house?"

"No, I'm not defenseless. And, you're bleeding. Again."

"Shit." Toji sits down close to the wall where it's safe, twisting his leg to bring the injured foot up to his face. He easily plucks the reddened shart between thick digits, and throws it far away from him.

Meanwhile, you bring your first-aid kit up to him, setting it down near.

"Here, use this."

"..."

"I'll do it for you then." You wasted no time, reaching for the line and thread. Once everything was stitched, you wrap a bandage around his foot, then pats it finished. "What's your name?"

"Fushiguro Toji."

"I'm L/N Y/N, lost all your bite huh?" You tease.

Casually ignored. "Why do you have a first-aid kit? Most people don't have it on their houses."

"I practice muay thai, it's useful both for me and you."

"Right. Have you seen my worm?"

"Well, make yourself at home, until your feet gets better. And yeah, your worm jumped at me like those surprise music boxes, and now it's on the couch with my cat. It's been watching movies with us."

He was beyond curious, because the worm didn't have a thinking mind nor knew what even meant to watch something. Toji limped to the doorframe, eyes widening once he spotted the worm wrapped snuggly around your very fluffy cat.

"That's some cute shit."

"The worm is gross."

"I think it looks cute."

"You're batshit crazy."

You stretched your limbs. "Whatever, let's waste some more time watching TV."

Toji sat down - mind you, taking a handful of space you were not content with - once you picked up "both" animals to make room. He thinks you're weird, seeing the fact you didn't question what the hell was that giant-purple-moving worm, and for letting in a random guy inside your house. You do fight a martial art, though, but most people wouldn't have such confidence on him - a dude build like a truck.

There's some survival show playing in the background, yet he's beyond bored watching it, so he settles in questioning your questionable manners.

"How are you so chill about everything?"

"Oh well," You seemed focused on the show, surprisement showing itself once you turn to him. "I see these things in a daily basis, so it's really no big deal after a while."

"Curses?"

"Yep."

"You-"

"I'm going to clean the kitchen. Also, I ask you once the skies darken, to leave my house."

"..."

"Is there a problem?"

"I got no hideout out there."

"Suuure you don't." You sighed. "Alright, the couch is your best option; if I hear rumbles at night, or if you steal me or something, I'll be the one chasing you."

"Right, have fun cleaning the blood stained kitchen."

"The audacity." You left with a smirk, shaking your head.

Although you're weird, so far, you're also the most interesting individual Toji has come up to par with; something in this house prickles at his skin to stay. Plus, the fluffy cat laying on his lap is very cute aswell.

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[dreamsmp-au-ideas]

the open to the right page of a book one actually sounds very useful would that work on digital fanfic because if so I want that power also does he have to have read the book already and know what to look for or just take a random book from a shelf open it to a random page and see a how to annoy your sister article and think oh something i Didn’t know i needEd ver important side note does loni exist what are tubbo and ranboos families like and how do they feel about there kids future as villains

The book thing was supposed to be a joke but i got carried away sooo these are his powers now!! Lmao

1) yes, it works on digital books/fanfictions too. Techno and ranboo, resident ao3 users, are infuriated by this.

2) he doesn't need to read the book beforehand, but the page he wants does need to be relevant to the book. If he opened up a murder mystery and said "give me the page where the body is discovered", it would work. If he opened a book about baby animals and said "give me the page where the main character's grandma steals the crown jewels," it wouldn't work.

The questions also can't be too vague. If he were trapped in a cell with the right book, it would go something like "give me a useful page " > "a page on how to escape" > "a page on how to use the tools around me" > "a page that tells me how to use a poster, toilet seat, matress or book to escape a prison cell". So unfortunately, no, he would not be able to come across a guide on how to annoy his sister unless he asked the right question to the right book.

3) lani isn't in this au (out of concern for blurring the lines between c! and cc!), but y'know who can be? Crumb cuptoast! Their dad is one captain sparklez who is suspicious but overall oblivious to his son's villainy. Crumb herself is all for it and wants to join in once she's old enough.

Ranboo was established to be a rich bitch and y'know what? Let's slap some trauma onto that! His parents barely know what colour his bedroom walls are, let alone what he does in his free time. All they care is that he keeps his grades high and doesn't ruin their reputation. Oh, ranboo wishes he could tell his parents what he gets up to when he hangs out with tommy and tubbo. That would sure get them to pay attention.

[noroi1000]

Hi!! Can I please have a romantic jjk matchup?? (and forgive me if I make a mistake in the writing, I'm not fluent in english yet♡)

I'm pansexual and genderfluid, that uses all the pronouns.

I'm a brazilian, my sign is Leo and MBTI is INTJ. I have tan skin, dimples, brown eyes, straight black hair that goes below my waist and bangs. About my body, I think what stands out the most are the really thick thighs and the hands and feet that are really small. I wear glasses (I have astigmatism and myopia, my grade is VERY high); where i live is SO hot but i really like to wear sweats and pants so sometimes it's kind of hard but i think i wear any kind of clothes? I like to experiment with new styles and I really want to dye my hair but I didn't have the opportunity; I'm absolutely addicted to wearing necklaces, bracelets and especially rings, I'm always wearing several.

I have a quiet, observant, sarcastic and motherly personality, although from a distance it seems that I will be rude to you, I will actually be very calm and give you soft smiles. I can get stressed out easily but I don't show anything but glare, and above all I NEVER raise my voice, even in a fight the only thing I'm going to do is keep my voice calm with a firm, authoritative tone. I LOVE protecting and caring for people and listening to them talk about what they like, I always give them my FULLY attention. My love language is 100% touch, I am always touching the people I like and care about. Another thing is that I'm not a submissive person in a relationship, like no.

I'm completely in love with all kinds of art, especially dancing (I'm ALWAYS dancing while listening to music, which is pretty much all day long) and drawing/painting (sometimes I end up doing a whole drawing and not even realize it). I love reading and I always have a book with me, physical or digital. I love animals, I have cats, dogs, parrots, turtles and cockatiels, and I would give my life for them all without a second thought. Oh, I also love anything horror related with passion and bake, most of the time I don't even eat, I just bake and give it to people because I love it when they say they like what I made.

I think your Jujutsu kaisen matchup is

Kento Nanami

He is the most peaceful man you can meet. He is usually stoic and calm. Often serious and pays no more attention to his surroundings than he needs to do.

People who know him know that he can even get irritated quickly and he does not pay attention to words. But he says it calmly.

More than yelling in annoyance, he speaks in sarcasm. It is enough for someone to ask him something and he will answer sarcastically. But he will only do this to the person who pissed him off.

When someone pisses him off, he will feel the pressure of being scolded and will know the feeling of fear well. He is furious but shows no emotion. It can be terrible 👀

For younger people, when he knows he has to take care of them because they are underage or too irresponsible, he feels the need to take care of everything by himself. He would not like something bad to happen or something to go wrong.

He will supervise everyone and instruct if necessary.

You can't see it, but he doesn't want anyone to get hurt. Even he feels he has friends and doesn't want him to have time to do anything. He'll care more for someone else's safety than his own.

He has a calm and deep tone of voice. No matter what happened. Whether he's angry or sad or happy, it doesn't change. He speaks calmly and with composure. And seldom upsets him to start screaming.

Anyone can talk to him. Even when he doesn't seem to be listening, his attention is divided and he can actually hear it all. When he feels the need to respond and continue the conversation, he will do so.

He is perceptive. He sees a lot. He sees many details that are not noticed by others around him. He has good eyesight and almost no change will escape him. That's why he likes to have everything in its place.

Just as he doesn't like to overwork, he doesn't like spending all his time at work. He prefers to come to his quiet home and take care of himself or someone who is waiting for him at home.

His house probably wouldn't be that big, and it wouldn't be crazy either. Would be a quiet place with light colors. No exaggeration with colors. But it definitely has a lot of free space there. There is simply nothing to put there. Garden, small terrace in front of the house. Everything is calm. Adapted to spend time in quiet activities. Or not to leave the house.

A peaceful life with someone is something you dream about.

Headcanon:

• He is admired by your concern for people. It may surprise him a bit, but he knew people who wanted to help others. Just like the fact that they like other people and see the world very positively. He cannot forbid you to do something like this because helping people is good. And also, if you like it, he can't forbid it. He considers it a positive quality and makes sure that you are a nice person.

• When you have a soft voice or keep it quiet, he feels like he can listen to you for hours. Without any scream or anything annoying.

• He is always surprised when you care for him. You tell him to take care when he leaves, you check to see if he's okay. You take care of him like no one else. He is surprised by this behavior because nobody has ever cared for him like that.

Additionally, you can check whether he is eating well or sleeping well. Everything is easier for him with you.

• He can talk to you normally. He will smile when he says something he wants to say to you and then hears your own opinion.

He takes a lot of your opinion, and he wouldn't want to do something without your permission and without hearing what you have to say about it. Everything that has to be for you, he prefers to consult with you.

He has to make sure of everything about you. And then it can surprise you. It will be when he knows what he needs about you. Favorite color, style. What exactly do you like. He has to find out everything. As much as you know his needs, he must make it up to you as much as he can.

• His hated time of the day is the morning for sure because he has to get out of the warm and pleasant bed where he sleeps with you and get ready to go to work. When he can sleep longer and hold you in his arms when he doesn't have to go out, he wants to stay that way. But then you can wake him up with the smell of freshly brewed coffee.

He might be telling you that you don't have to make him meals all the time because he too can cook something for you. He knows you like to bake and he wouldn't forbid you to do what you love.

• The best time of the day is when you come home from work. He loves to see you smile when you are home when he comes back.

• When you visit him at work during his break, there is nothing he could do but get you on his lap to spend such a few minutes.

• Each day is a very nice experience for him. He has gotten used to your touch when you run your hands over his shoulders or his back when he is facing you, and when he turns you throw your hands around his neck to let one of your hands slide over his . It's just as nice as when you hug him from behind or from all sides. He really likes to feel your touch against his skin.

So will he who will run his hands over his shoulders, stomach, waist and back to show that he loves you. He will kiss your shoulder, neck or head as he comes from behind and watch you prepare something to eat with his hands clasped around your waist.

• He lets you guide yourself. If you want him to keep his hands where you want, or if you want him to do something for you, he will. He himself does not order you, and he allows you to do so.

He loves your homemade cakes and pastries. Everything that is home made is better than from the store. And what you bake even better. Thanks to you, he likes bread even more. But only yours.

• He knows your preferences. Therefore, when he buys you jewelry as a gift, it is perfect. You will like it. He knows what you like, what color, what metal. And also in what style.

Same with him, because if he got a signet ring from you, he could wear it anywhere. It would remind him of you no matter where he was.

• In his house, he can arrange a corner for any pet you want to have. It is important to him that they do not spoil anything. Besides, they also have a garden at their disposal which they would surely have.

• Watching you move to the beat of the music while whatever you do is the most beautiful sight for him.

• He will definitely show his feelings to you in different ways. Touch is probably the best for him as well. However, it is important to him that he only loves you.

"Do you always move like this when I'm not home? Even when I hold you, your whole body dances, right? What kind of dance do you like best? Why don't you dance it for me? Or… Maybe we'll dance together?"

[moons-and-stars-and-shit]

Heyo can I request a hq matchup thingy? I've been all over yer blog and its cute!

I'm 5'8 (on the verge of 5'9), sorta athletic build, lanky but not really slim and more on the curvy side, she/they, light redish brown skin tone, I have shoulder length coily dark brown hair with bangs, glasses, i wear beanies to hide my bedhead and I have a slash on my left eyebrow from when i scraped it on a desk at age nine it was very fun. Totally unrelated note but my friends say i smile like Squirtle and when I'm mad i just look like a really intimidating baby duck 😞

I'm a sagittarius, I have ADHD, a little tomboyish personality wise bc i wear a lot of skirts but im nowhere near girly, I'm a bit rowdy but I'd never do anything to make someone uncomfortable, i gots mommy issues and a little bit of a temper but I'm very approachable, I speak fluent sarcasm and can come off a little rude if ya don't know me that well but I'm very respectful but i kinda swear a lot....

Despite my 'sense of instability' i come from a family full of lawers and veterans (kept separate my parents broke up before i as born), growing up I didnt have the best childhood so i always have empathy and best believe i will fact check you if your out of line 🤬. I'm the one who's willing to cheer you on and support you through thick and thin as well as being at almost every game or event your preforming/ playing at :), I'm very generous and a bit of a care giver(more of a simp if ya squint): ya want water?? "here have mine", hungry? ''oh want McDonald's? i can pay if ya want'' cold?? "here my hoodie im pretty warm already"

My hobbies include singing, playing bass and acoustic guitar, both traditional + digital drawing, dancing and i play a lot of sports like volleyball (i spike and/or set), softball (pitch), boxing + track and field (are those two even a sport???). I've always wanted to be a really big artist and if it doesn't work out i can always try out voice acting bc even though my voice is pretty low i can make it really high pitch like shoujo anime girl high pitch or become a sports journalist ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I'm the memer of my friend group and i like to think my sense of humor and style are on point. I'm a big horror movie junkie... from 80s to late and early 2000s, every slashers, thrillers to sci-fi trust me I've watched it all >:), i loveeeee Pokémon i may or may mot have had a huge crush on Brock and James when i was 6 , and Sanrio, i stick kuromi stickers on everything i own 😅. I also have a really big Batman obsession (grew up around a lot of bois other than my brothers) but i prefer MARVEL...

Sorry this seems pretty long and totally disregard if yer busy but have a good day/night <3

@callmedirtbag

Romantic Matchup

Semi Eita

How Y’all Met

So you we’re new to Shiratorizawa

And you we’re just walking around campus when you found a gym

When you peeked inside you saw a empty gym

But what really intrigued you was the volleyball net and balls inside 👀

The gym looked pretty empty so you decided to mess around with the volleyballs for a bit

You got so into your practicing that you didn’t notice Semi walk in

Semi was a little confused on why there was just a random person in the gym

But he couldn’t deny that you had some skill 😗

However he saw that you were struggling with your sets

So he decided to help you 😃

Ngl you we’re very kinda embarrassed about getting caught practicing

But he assured you that he didn’t really care and that the rest of the team wasn’t coming for another 30 minutes or so

After hearing that you gladly accepted his offer to help you practice

You two actually got to know each other quite well during this time

So when the rest of the team started filing in to practice

You gave Semi your number and told him to text you if he ever wanted to hang out

You left just before Tendou started picking on Semi for blushing 👀

Anyways you guys became really good friends and would hang out A LOT

So nobody was too shocked when you both decided to start dating

But apparently Tendou and Shirabu had made a bet on it 😅

What They Love About You

He loves the fact that your kind

But will fuck someone up if needed 🙂

He knows he never has to worry about you

He loves that your a fellow musician

To him it’s just one more thing you two have in common

And it’s one more thing he gets to do with you

He loves how supportive you are

Even though you know that semi doesn’t get to play that much

You still show up to EVERY one of his games to cheer the team on

And oh god when he does get to play

I swear people from OUTSIDE the gym can hear you cheering for him

Honestly he doesn’t mind if your a simp 👀

There’s a teeny tiny 🤏 part of him that likes to be babied

Favorite Things To Do Together

Oml he loves for horror movie marathons

He absolutely loves them

Because A: he gets to watch almost EVERY single horror movie made

And B: he gets to watch them with you :D

Oh and he also loves to watch any and all marvel movies with you 👀

But other than movies

He loves to make music with you

Duh

It’s usually you both playing instruments together

But every now and then one of you will sing 🎶

Random Hc

You two write the CUTEST songs together

But you never ever sing them

Like wtf you two

One time semi offered to help you practice your spikes

And you accidentally hit him in the face 💀

Now he swears you have a better spike then ushijima 👀

Your friends mentioned your squirtle smile to him...

And now he can’t unsee it 🥲

Astrology

The security and flexibility they can give one another.

Once they open up to one another and to appreciate their different philosophies in love and in life, these two have potential for steamy relations, deep connections and heartfelt respect.

As long as they communicate and celebrate their differences, theirs will be a passionate relationship.

Both Scorpio and Sagittarius see each day as an adventure and as an endless opportunity to explore, to probe, to learn. Shared escapades bring them closer.

While Sagittarius may get fed up with Scorpio’s stubbornness and inflexibility, Scorpio could be thinking their Sagittarius mate is just a little too hotheaded.

They’ll enjoy learning together, and travel could be very beneficial for this pair.

Their relationship is always on the go!

Mars is the God of War, opening the door for Scorpio’s determined, courageous character.

Mars, when combined with Pluto, represents rebirth and renewal.

Jupiter focuses on philosophy, higher learning, expansion, optimism, luck and travel.

These planetary attributes — of growth, expansion and masculine energy — combine to create a sustainable relationship of mutual admiration.

Overall Aesthetic

90s

No Scrubs - TLC

Say My Name - Destiny’s Child

She’s So High - Tai Bachman

99 Red Balloons - Nena