#oh and the time my alarm went off and it was i think lara? who was like hi i'm filling in for a couple hours bc maggie got hit by a car

[moregraceful]

last post was fanfic bc the kdfc hosts are actually some of the most diabolical motherfuckers on the planet. i never had a parasocial enemy until the morning show host, maggie, played flight of the valkyries twice in two weeks at 7am. conducted by DUDAMEL. i'm less intimately acquainted with their afternoon and night hosts as i am with maggie but every once in a while over here when i'm homesick i'll turn on the app stream to listen to their live show in the afternoon or evening and lara or robin will be like whooooo wants to hear some of the most aggressive harpsichord you've ever in your life. NOT ME. NEVER ME.

i do recommend their arcade stream on the website or app bc it's really good. i'm not a gamer but it's such a good look at how classical music has shaped gaming experiences. also if you're christmas-aligned, the classical california christmas stream is good but nuestra navidad is GREAT.

support your local music stations 😭

[garbagevanfleet]

Brightest Blue (series)

PART SEVEN

Pairing: Josh x reader Warnings: men being shitty and creepy!! possible trigger for sexual assult Summary:  Things are changing. New state. New school. New roommate. You just pray things are going to click into place. Notes: things are taking an odd turn, right? (sorry this is posted so late) 

taglist: @valleyd0ll​ @satingrass-maidensfair​ @guitarfingers​ @thebohemianpenguin​ @peaceisouranthem​ @oblvions​ @hansonobsessed​ @myownparadise96​ @lara-gvf​ @anditsmywholeheart​ @kill-fear-the-power-of-lies​ @bigblack-catattack​

MASTERPOST 

You woke up to the shrill chiming of an alarm cutting through your head like a circle saw. The unexpected noise made you sit up instantly, putting your gaze directly on a desk, the top of it overflowing with sheet music. 

Josh started to stir next to you, his hand reaching out from under the blanket to grab his phone from where it sat in between you.

The sore spot on your ribs made you wince, and your eyes drifted down to find your own phone, pressed into the mattress from you sleeping on it. 

When the screen flicked on, you let out a sharp gasp. 

“Josh, we have like fifteen minutes to leave!” you yelped, hopping instantly out of bed and finding your knees a little wobbly. 

He sat up then, rubbing across his face. 

You gazed back at him, frowning at the odd setup; he was laying on top of the comforter but under a different blanket.

“Shit, I had yesterday’s alarm still set for my late class,” he murmured, inching himself toward the end of the bed. 

“Oh my god,” you whined, racing to the bathroom. You brushed your teeth way too quickly, knowing in your heart that you did a poor job.

When you returned to Josh’s room for your phone, he was pulling a clean shirt over his head.

  “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, sounding somewhere between asleep and awake.

“It’s okay, I should have set my own alarm,” you admitted, snatching your cell from the bed and scooting past him again. “It’s really okay. Are you going to be ready to leave in like ten?”

He nodded as he ran his fingers through his curls. “Yeah, you?”

“I’m praying.” 

On the walk to school, you remembered. 

“Fuck, my presentation is today. And I got high and didn’t practice.”

He chuckled under his breath, clasping his hand around your shoulder. “You’re going to be fine- just breathe and stay calm. If you mess up, take a pause and keep going.” 

You nodded furiously. “Okay. Okay. Can you text that to me? What if I forget?”

He laughed in earnest then. “Yes, I’ll text you.” 

You exhaled a lengthy breath, nodding as you tried to calm your nerves. 

In front of the entrance to the B hall, he spun you around to face him, holding the biceps of each of your arms. He mimicked taking a deep breath, prompting you to do the same without another thought. 

“Relax,” he instructed coolly. “And I’ll see you at lunch.”

+++

You had your hands clasped tightly in your lap, nervous enough that your palms were sweating. Getting up and speaking to a room of people was high on your list of things that felt like torture, especially since you hadn’t had time to shower or do anything with your mess of hair besides pinning it up into a bun as best you could. 

You thanked a divine power that the outfit you had thrown on in a haste ended up looking surprisingly presentable. 

As it neared your turn, you got your papers in order and straightened up your posture. When your name was called, you promptly stood, descending the steps and ending up down at the podium. 

You had just opened your mouth to start when your phone chimed in your pocket. Your eyes popped open wide, hoping you’d hallucinated the sound instead of forgetting to silence your ringer. 

The professor was giving you an unamused look as you gave a weak laugh.

 “One sec, sorry,” you muttered, fishing out your phone. You flicked the little button down on the side, but as the screen lit up, you got to read what the message said. 

Josh      just now Just pretend everyone’s me or pretend they’re naked. Probably not both though.

You couldn’t help but huff a laugh as you tucked it back away. The nerves that had you so on edge started to dampen, just a bit. 

+++

That afternoon, you walked home alone. Josh had texted you that he’d be staying until 5 or 6 to make sure the production was going along smoothly, but when he returned to the apartment, it was with a bottle of wine. 

You were doing some of the dishes from the previous day and had to wipe your soapy hands on a dishtowel before he crossed the room and pulled you into a side hug. 

The two of you had talked about how well the presentation went when you met at lunch, but you hadn’t imagined he’d make such a big deal about it. 

“I had Jake pick me up and take me to the liquor store, and I got this so we could celebrate,” he informed, his voice kind of soft - either sheepish or tired, you couldn’t quite tell. 

“You didn’t have to do that,” you replied, but couldn’t suppress the huge grin splitting your lips. 

He nodded, offering a soft smile. “I know.” He set the bottle down on the table pointedly. “I wanted to.”

You fished the make-shift corkscrew from the utensil drawer, brandishing it like a knife to earn a melodic laugh from Josh. 

He popped the door of the fridge open to peer inside. “We might be able to make something special for dinner. Or, at least more special than mac and cheese or sandwiches.”

When the idea popped into your head, you crossed the room and grabbed your purse. 

“I still have about,” you paused to count the bills in your wallet. “$34 from shopping. I was saving it for something nice, so why don’t we order something in?”

He grinned at you, leaning back against the wall next to the fridge and letting his head rest against it. “What kind of take-out are you thinking? You should get to pick.”

“Oh, please,” you huffed, playfully rolling your eyes as you started unwrapping the foil around the rim of the wine bottle. “One, I could have never done so well if it weren’t for you. And two, you’re from here, so you’d know what’s worth ordering.”

His pink lips tilted up into a smirk. “I’m not from here though.”

“Close enough.” You took a moment to think before continuing on. The tip of the corkscrew was broken, leaving a blunt edge and he watched you struggle to pierce the cork with it. “Is there any kind of Indian? Or Thai maybe?” 

He nodded. “There’s an Indian restaurant downtown. It’s pretty yummy if I remember right.”

“That kinda sounds perfect, right?” 

He held his hand out, flicking his eyes down at the corkscrew and then back up at you until you reluctantly handed it over. He picked up the bottle and popped it open with ease, his smirk only growing. 

“Yeah, perfect.”

+++

Thursday evening, Trevor showed up around five, just as you were finished making your bedroom look like a cute study nook. You weren’t entirely sure how much studying either of you planned on doing, but since he only brought one notebook and nothing else, you weren’t very hopeful about getting any work done. 

“I wasn’t expecting you to have a roommate,” he said in a playful tone.

“I do. When I moved here, I knew I couldn’t afford to live alone, so I rolled the dice. He’s a great friend, as it turns out. Do you want something to drink?” you asked as he stepped through your doorway and set his stuff down on your bed. 

“That’d be cool.”

“We have juice and milk and water and iced tea.”

He shrugged with a smile. “Anything but milk, please.”

You nodded. “I’ll bring you some juice.” 

Josh, who was seated in the sitting chair in the living room, working on his own homework, looked up at you through his eyelashes with a mischievous-looking smile.

You shot him a scowl. “Don’t be weird,” you whispered, and then in a normal tone, finished with, “Would you like some juice too?”

He huffed a laugh, shaking his head at you. “That’s okay, I can get my own. You just worry about him.”

Trevor happily took his glass as you handed it to him, giving you a “thank you”. 

“Of course,” you replied as you sat next to him on the bed and pulled your stack of textbooks onto your lap. “Where should we start?”

“You actually want to study?” he mused, sounding disbelieving.

You bit your lip. “Probably for a little while at least, right?” 

He shrugged back at you, but you tried to brush off the odd attitude. Maybe you’d given him the wrong impression as to exactly what this would be, but you could fix it. 

“So, we’re supposed to read chapters ten through sixteen and then do all the questions,” you informed, flipping the book open. “You want me to read it out loud?” 

You thought maybe offering to do most of the work would brighten his mood, but every time you looked over at him while you were reading, he was scrolling through his phone. He had a bored expression painted across his features, and it took him nearly a full minute to realize you’d stopped reading. 

When he finally looked up at you, he gave a smile that you knew he thought was the most charming thing you’d ever seen.

You could hear a knock on the front door and Josh shuffling around in the living room. 

“Have you been listening to any of this? You look like you’d rather be anywhere else.” You tried to keep your tone from sounding annoyed, but you knew you couldn’t hide it as well as you wished. 

“I’d rather be doing anything else if I’m being honest.” There was not a single shred of an apology in his voice, and when you spoke again, you knew it would be even less put together.

“Why did you want to come over for a study session if you didn’t want to study?” It was less of a question and more of a scathing review of his character, or at least what you’d seen of it so far.

He frowned at you, looking a shade on the accusatory side for your liking. “I feel like you should have known what that actually meant.” 

You could hear a conversation going on in the kitchen, and you silently wished you were out there instead. The longer you heard them talk, the more convinced you became that it was Jake, and you wondered if Josh invited him over on purpose, or if he just showed up.

“You said you thought I was good in class and that part of why you asked me out was so I could help you with classwork.”

He rolled his blue eyes. “Yeah, if I hadn’t, I can’t imagine you would have invited me over.”

You had your mouth open to snap a response, but somehow, his words hurt you. Not much, but just enough for your chest to feel tight, and not just from anger.

 “Did you think you could manipulate me into having sex with you?” you asked quietly, your brows threaded close together in a frown. 

He gave a long, bored-sounding sigh. “Don’t act like I’m a bad guy, here. Everyone does it. Give some fake compliments and then make your move, you know?”

For emphasis, he placed his hand on your thigh, a little too high up. It made your teeth clench, jaw tightened by rage.

“Don’t touch me. You should go,” you stated. 

He huffed a sarcastic laugh as he inched his hand a bit further up your leg. He moved toward you until his face was nearing your neck. “Come on, what’s the big deal?” 

Before you could stop yourself, you reached a hand out and slapped him across his face, your palm making contact with the hollow of his cheek. You hadn’t been expecting the crack of noise when you made contact; it ripped through the room, and out into the living area if you had to guess. 

It took him a beat to realize what happened, but as soon as he did, he stood from your bed. You picked up his notebook and handed it to him, and he ripped it from your grasp, a dirty look on his features. 

“You’re a cockteasing bitch,” he snapped, nursing the red spot on his cheek. 

He was already halfway through the living room when you moved to stand in the doorway of your room. 

“Fuck off,” you called through clenched teeth as he opened the front door and let himself out. When he was gone you realized that Josh and Jake were both looking at you with similar degrees of concern from where they were sat on the couch. 

“What happened?” Josh asked, frowning up at you. 

Embarrassed, you flicked your eyes over to Jake who had one eyebrow quirked up at you. 

“Oh, you know. Just boys lying to me so they can fuck,” you snapped as you retreated to your room and closed the door. You instantly felt bad for being short with them, especially since Josh is just about the last person you could ever imagine being mean to, but you’d apologize later. 

Right then, you were going to curl up in bed.

After a couple of hours, Jake left and you wondered how long it would take before Josh came in to bug you, but he didn’t. You listened for his footsteps coming toward your door, but you could hear him in the living room, turning the page of a book every now and again. 

Eventually, you couldn’t help yourself - you threw the blankets off and stood. The stiffness in your muscles was a poor consolation prize for the day. 

He looked up at you, shutting his book instantly, his homework caught between the pages. 

“Hey,” he greeted quietly. He patted the spot next to him on the couch. “I’m sorry your...thing went so poorly.”

You were too annoyed to care anymore, so you laid your head on his shoulder, letting out a long sigh. It surprised you when you felt a tear drip down your cheek and you could feel your face start to warm in response. 

He heard you sniffle and his form stiffened immediately. His arm wrapped around your shoulder, pulling you tight to him. 

“Did he hurt you?” It sounded like Josh’s throat was tight, making his words hoarse.

“No, he just,” You weren’t sure how to finish that. He hadn’t really hurt you, per se. “He just tried to touch me. And then he didn’t stop when I told him to.”

“What?” His tone was charmingly offended on your behalf. 

“It’s okay,” you assured, wiping your face with the sleeve of your sweater. “I’m more angry than anything. I just kind of can’t believe I fell for that, you know? The whole ‘let’s study’ thing.”

“Stop that - it’s not your fault.” You could feel the hesitation as he laid his hand against your ear, but you leaned into it, grateful for the comfort.

It was quiet for a long moment while you calmed yourself down. His presence was more of a reassurance than anything else you could have imagined at the moment.

“You’re my best friend,” you breathed, turning to nuzzle your nose against the fabric of his sleeve. “And I’m lucky to have you.”

Through a smile, you heard him say, “Me too.”

[coeurdastronaute]

Essays in Existentialism: Boss

Prompt.. Lexa and Clarke sleep together one night, the next morning Clarke comes in to start her new job and turns out Lexa will be her boss (basically how Meredith and Derek first meet in grey's anatomy) yeah cool...love your writing

The tiny townhouse on the corner of Grant and Lincoln was nearly unpacked, but still occupied the unfinished zone of moving in. The furniture was there, with boxes opened and in various states of emptied. Sheets were tossed on the bed, but it wasn’t made. Clothes were rooted through and half hung in the closet at the top of the stairs. The only things in the fridge were little Chinese take out boxes and a handful of sauce packets. 

But that didn’t mean a thing to the bodies on the couch. 

Well tired and sated, the two tangled torsos and limbs hung and clung to each other on the small area, not having much to discuss the night before, but rather making the other body too tired to hear and speak and think, and thus fell asleep in a knot. It wasn’t many hours of sleep between the bar and the sex and the moment one of the bodies shifted and the otehr fell to the floor with a thud. 

“Ow.” 

“What was--”

“Just my back. And hip. And… head,” the body on the floor wheezed slightly, wincing against the pain. 

“Oh shit, it’s daylight,” Clarke squinted toward the windows witn no curtains or blinds and realized how late it was. “Oh fuck!”

“Seems to be.” 

The body on the couch sat up and hopped over the back before snatching the blanket and carefully wrapping it around her naked body. 

“I have to go. I have work...um…”

“Lexa,” she sat up from the floor, propping herself up on her elbows and looking up over the cushions. 

Completely naked, the girl on the floor smiled and pushed away a mess of hair while Clarke looked at her and blushed and tried not to look, desperately. She wanted to look, but that would distract her from the process of getting ready, and Clarke had to get to work. It was her first day, after all, beautiful naked sex god be damned. 

“Right. Lexa. Nice to meet you, but I have to--”

“Yeah, of course,” she nodded, tugging a pillow in front of herself to shield as much nakedness as possible. “Do you live here?” 

“Just moved.” 

“Cool. From where.” 

“I really have to-- It was fun and all--”

A pair of blank panties were held up from the floor by hands attached to a mischievous hand oddly victorious grin. Clarke remembered the same smile somewhere between the whiskey and tequila, the smile nd the eyes and the intent way the stranger in the bar listened to her words. More importantly, she remembered the fragments of the sex and the things that mouth could do and that was the reason for the victory, and it was deserved. 

“But you have to go to work,” Lexa repeated. 

With a graceless motion, Clarke reached over the couch and snatched the offending lingerie before agreeing full-heartedly. 

“It was nice to meet you, Lexa,” Clarke promised. “But when I come back downstairs, you’ll be gone, and I’ll be on my way to work.” 

“Right. Work. I should, too. It was nice, to uh, do this. Maybe we can again--”

The offer was barely acknowledged as Clarke hopped up the stairs and toward the shower, leaving Lexa smiling somewhat, amused at the display before she looked down at herself and chuckled at what the past five minutes of her life looked like. 

XXXXXXXXXX

It was incredibly stupid. It was monumentally stupid. It was the dumbest thing she’d ever done, or at least very close to the top of the long list. But after three weeks of refusing to unpack the house and dealing with the question of employment, Clarke couldn’t handle it any longer, and joined the land of the living again. Perhaps a bit too hard, which was, above all else, stupid. Incredibly stupid. 

Clarke didn’t have too much time to think about anything else as she sprinted into the tall building that had its own distinct imprint on the city. Hair a mess and shirt sloppily in the process of being tucked in, she flashed her badge and rushed toward the elevators as she repeated how stupid it’d been to get absolutely drunk and hook up with a stranger on the couch, and then not setting an alarm, for her first day of her dream job. 

Again and with emphasis, Clarke was an incredibly stupid and gay individual. 

“Ms. Griffin,” the receptionist greeted her with a smile. “I’ve been instructed to ask that you wait right here until Ms. Moore is finished with her phonecall.” 

“Right, of course,” Clarke nodded as she attempted to underplay how extravagantly winded she was. 

Grateful for the moment to process, Clarke took a seat in the reception and processed what the past hour of her life looked like. She somehow woke up and kicked out a very naked woman from her house, that she could almost remember the name of somewhat. And she’d run across town and made it to work. On time, or at least on time enough for her boss. 

Only when she’d caught her breath did Clarke realize that she never got Le-- La-- Lara? Lena? Larry? Fuck. She never got the stranger’s number. 

“Hey, Clarke, thanks for your patience.” 

The woman who interviewed her twice finally walked out from behind the hallowed doors of Woods Publishing, and Clarke gave up trying to remember and prayed she did not smell like as much tequila as she’d inhaled the night before. 

“I’m so happy to be here, Ms. Moore,” she grinned and shook the outstretched hand. 

“Luna is fine. We’re the creatives,” she winked and led Clarke toward the door. “We get a little more freedom than the stuffed shirts in editing and sales.” 

As they moved down the hall, there was a minute smell of weed, and Clarke realized that this job was going to be better than she’d ever imagined. 

“I thought for your first day, I’d kind of get you set up, take you to our morning huddle and pitch meetings, and then after lunch make you meet everyone in a super awkward and invasive department bash.” 

“Bash?” 

“Yeah, well, people stop coming when I call them meetings and ice-breakers. I’ve decided to rename things different, more fun words to trick them into the same meetings.” 

“How’s it going so far?” 

“Amazingly well. Just wait until you see the turn out for your meet-and-greet… I mean bash.” 

Clarke couldn’t help but smile. Her boss was calm and cool, funny and approachable, and most importantly, she was clearly very into her job, which was a godsend. Hiring was often abou personality and camaraderie, as in how well a new personality would fit into a team, and Clarke already felt at home. 

The day went by easily enough, as all first days are known to do. She met her team and got her desk, got to feel out a little of how the day flowed with the promise of her assignments arrival soon enough. Luna passed her off around lunch to one of the teammates, and Clarke fell into enjoying her new coworkers with very light company gossip over not terrible sandwiches in the cafeteria. She learned all about the office romances and the merger, the new corporate structure and how great it was compared to other companies. She learned about the owner’s daughter who started a few months ago and was actually nice to work for, and more importantly, Clarke learned that there was a very lax policy when it came to punctuality. She breathed a sigh of relief. 

By the end of the day, Clarke felt like she would like it there, and was eager to help and work on drawing some of the projects. She was ready to work with the team and she was ready to finally be creative and produce something. 

“Thank you all again, for welcoming Clarke to our team,” Luna grinned and held up her glass as the rest of the team did the same. 

She was right, of course, that calling it a bash did something to make them all want to stay a few minutes later and mingle. 

“Enjoy the gift baskets sent from the studio for our last project, but within reason. And we’ll jump right in tomorrow.” 

“Thanks,” Clarke smiled and accepted a drink. 

“I’ll see you bright and early. We’ll get you started on part of our new programming and onto the new project.” 

“I can’t wait.”

Clarke found herself pulled into a conversation over artwork for the storyboard on the wall in the main rom, and even though it was technically about work, the other artists were more than eager to talk about their plans, even over drinks. 

And then she looked up and nearly spit out her drink before turning around very quickly so that her back was to the familiar green eyes and the person she’d kicked onto the floor that very morning. 

“Looks like the boss decided to make a stop. I’m going to finally ask her out,” one of the guys decided as he stood a little straighter and awkwardly fixed his hair. 

“There’s no way Lexa Woods gives you the time of day,” Raven scoffed, sipping her drink and sneaking a look at the grinning CEO. “I bet you twenty bucks she doesn’t even speak to you.” 

“She’s really nice.” 

“Oh, I know. But I bet she won’t even notice you.” 

Clarke felt the blood leave her face as she hurried to sneak another look to confirm that it was, in fact, hell freezing over. And sure enough, for some stranger reason, in a city of hundreds of thousands of people, she was in the same room as the stranger she drunkenly hooked up with sixteen hours beforehand. 

And that stranger was her boss’ boss’ boss’ boss. That stranger was Lexa Woods, CFO of Woods Publishing, daughter of the owner, inheritor to the castle. 

“What do you think, Clarke?” Raven turned toward her. Just five minutes ago, Clarke liked Raven, but now, she wanted to disappear and Raven was blocking the exit. “Think Dan here has a chance?” 

“I don’t really know anything about her,” Clarke shrugged and downed the rest of her drink, careful to stay turned around. 

She didn’t know anything about Lexa Woods, except how she tasted and the noises she made and this thing she did with her fingers that--

“She hasn’t been here long, but she’s actually not the worst, as far as suits go. She likes the creative floors. Her dad’s given her a few projects I’ve been on and I think we work pretty well together,” she explained, offering Clarke a refill. 

“Cool, cool, nice.” 

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Or you’re a very bad drinker.” 

“I, uh, had a few too many last night.” 

“Hair of the dog then,” Raven grinned and clinked their glasses. “I think I’m going to like having you around, Griffin. At least until you start asking for advanced tech and drive me crazy with your doodles. Oh shit, there he goes.” 

Despite herself, Clarke turned around and watched the illustrator move through the crowd. She looked immediately at Lexa and actually caught her eye. She held the look and she watched Lexa smile at her, though she couldn’t move to return it. Mortification was at the forefront of her brain. That and oddly proud of herself for pulling someone like Lexa Woods, even when she wasn’t on her A game. 

Only when Clarke saw Dan get close, did she look away and break the stupor she found herself stuck in. 

“I can’t believe he hasn’t figured out that she’s gay.” 

“What?”

“Dan has the worst gay-dar of all time,” Raven chuckled. “I almost feel bad taking his money. Almost.” 

Sure enough, as he walked up toward his boss’ boss’ boss, full of confidence and vim, Lexa didn’t even notice him, her eyes firmly locked on Clarke’s as she moved through the crowd, finally deciding to approach. It took a few steps before Clarke realized what was happening, and only then did she feel the two and a half drinks she’d had. 

She really didn’t like Raven. 

“I knew it.” 

Clarke didn’t say a word, but rather looked for a quick escape, though none existed and she already knew that. 

“Hey, I thought I’d come welcome you to the team personally. I’m Lexa Woods.” 

With a smile and her hand outstretched, the CEO stood there, as if she hadn’t gone down on her new employee on her couch. 

“Lexa Woods, as in…” 

“Yeah, that’s my name outside, but don’t hold it against me,” she grinned, holding the handshake a little bit longer. “It was Callie, right?” 

“Clarke.” 

“I’m sorry. Clarke.” 

“I didn’t expect to see you on my first day.” 

“Yeah,” Lexa chuckled. “I can imagine. I like hanging out down here more than upstairs. How are you, Ms. Reyes?” 

“Doing alright,” Raven nodded, appraising the scene before her. “Taking Clarke under my wing, as it were.” 

“I’d be careful,” the boss warned. “It was nice to meet you again, Clarke. I’ll see you guys later. I have a meeting I should try to get to ontime. Punctuality is key.”

Clarke burned red and nodded. 

“Nice to meet you, too, Ms. Woods.” 

“Lexa’s fine.”

“Yeah you are.” 

Lexa just smiled and waved again before disappearing. Dan joined the group a second later and passed a twenty to his friend. The boss left the room a moment later without a look back, and Clarke finally breathed. 

“So,” Raven furrowed. “When did you fuck our boss?” 

XXXXXXXXXX

For three weeks, Clarke managed to avoid all thoughts and ideas of Lexa Woods, CEO and absolute beauty. She didn’t avoid her social media, nor did she avoid much of the idle gossip about her at work, but for the most part, Clarke refused to think about her as much as possible, which amounted to about never. 

Sometimes at work, she was able to go for hours, focusing on her projects. Sometimes, Clarke found herself avoiding areas she suspected she might show up, and for three glorious weeks, she was fairly successful. 

Bent over her drawing board, Clarke found herself in a period of Lexa-less thoughts, happy to escape her life and all else, and instead find some sort of outlet for everything she’d been feeling over the past year. 

“These are very good.” 

“Fuck, you scared me,” Clarke breathed, turning around quickly. “I mean. Not fuck.”

“I’m sorry I haven’t followed up,” Lexa smiled softly, hands tied behind her back as she perused Clarke’s wall of sketches for the short they were doing. “I was out of town on business. How is your first month going, Ms. Griffin?” 

“Do you take such an interest in all of your employees, or just the ones you seduce?” 

“I believe you were the one seducing. I was drunk and adorable and you took advantage of me in my drunk and adorable state.” 

Clarke balked and grit her teeth before seeing that Lexa was making fun of her, which did nothing to calm her. 

“Someone who pins the other to their front door, is not being taken advantage of.” 

She smiled again and Clarke found it infuriating. And hot. But also infuriating a little more. 

“I did do that, didn’t I?” Lexa nodded. “I’ve been trying to figure out how to address that… trist.” 

“It was a fluke, and I think we should stay professional. Like we have.”

“I thought I was keeping it fairly professional.” 

“I just mean, you can’t-- we don’t have to talk about that… trist.” 

“Or we could?” she waited to gauge Clarke’s reaction. “Or not. Definitely not. Very professional. Just pretend it never happened.” 

“Exactly. Thank you for stopping by, Ms. Woods.” 

“Lexa is still fine. We’re going to be working together a bit. Everyone calls me Lexa.” 

“Professional,” Clarke repeated. 

“Casual, even. Professionally casual.” 

“Exactly.” 

XXXXXXXXX

“Professional,” Lexa nodded to herself and tried to catch her breath. The naked body beside her repeated the same thing with a sigh. 

“But we can’t do that again. We were just scratching an itch,” Clarke reasoned as Lexa agreed, humming along with the familiar song. 

If any of that were true, she wouldn’t have been naked in Clarke’s half-made bed, next to a full-naked girl. If she had anything to say about it, they’d be doing it much more and often and professionally. But she was the boss, and she wasn’t allowed to make that call. Clarke had to make it. And Lexa was very grateful that Clarke made it. 

It wasn’t Lexa’s fault that they enjoyed the same bar, or that they happened to notice each other, and it wasn’t her fault that she liked kissing Clarke. 

“I quite like scratching that itch with you.” 

Lexa turned her head and watched Clarke smile before regaining her composure. 

“Don’t sweet talk me, Woods. I’m your employee.” 

“Yeah, but like, only kind of.” 

Clarke turned and gave her a look before Lexa chuckled and rolled toward her, pressing her luck as she pressed against Clarke, kissing her shoulder and her neck. 

“What are we supposed to do?” Clarke turned over as well. “Go into HR and tell them we’re sleeping together?” 

“I could fire you?” 

“Lexa.”

“I could quit?” 

“Shut up.” 

“Or you could agree to go on an actual date with me, and promise not to take your clothes off.” 

“You’re the one that takes them off of me!” 

Despite her wiggling, Clarke let Lexa pull her closer. She ran her fingertips along Lexa’s cheek, squishing her cheeks together so she was making fish lips and smiled at the display, amused at herself and how Lexa let her do that. 

“I zwant tovee hrofeshinal widzth you. Vutd I sink I alike you.” 

“You sound ridiculous.” 

Lexa sighed until Clarke let go of her cheeks, unable to keep the smile there. Instead she held her chin now, between her forefinger and thumb, keeping her steady and there. Fingertips moved up and down her back. 

“I think we can do this without messing up work.” 

“How?” 

“We just don’t work together. I’ll stay off of your projects. Luna has complete control over personnel and who is on what.” 

“If it goes bad?” 

“Then I’ll definitely quit. Sell the company probably. Move to Zurich,” she decided. 

“That plan developed quickly.” 

“It’s always in my back pocket in case a beautiful girl who works for me creates a problem. I will not be caught unprepared again.” 

“Again?” 

“It’s an expression.” 

“Mmm,” Clarke smiled and nodded. 

She didn’t waste a moment. She leaned forward and kissed Lexa because she had to be certain, and she had to find some kind of bravery. She should think about it more, and she should have made a pros and cons list, but something about this moment, this person, Clarke just felt alive, and she’d been chasing it for so long. 

“Did I get the job?”

“You got a date. One date.” 

“I can work with that.”

[thisismandee]

You’re my PainKiller (Spencer Reid x F!Reader)

Part 1| Part 2| Part 3

Word Count: 1.7k

Content Warning: Talk of murder typically criminal minds warnings. 

Summary: The next morning with Spencer. Then the team gets called into a case.

You woke up to your alarm the next morning. You looked over at the couch and noticed Spencer wasn’t there. You got up and turned off your alarm and picked up the living room. You grabbed the empty bowl that was filled with popcorn the night prior and walked towards the kitchen. As you walked in you saw Spencer making a pot of coffee. You also noticed that he was already dressed for the day. 

“What time did you wake up?” You asked him as you put the bowl in the sink and grabbed two to go cups from your cupboard. 

“Only like ten minutes ago.” He replied, and you believed him because you could hear the roughness in his morning voice. You had to admit his morning voice was kind of hot, in that he is your friend and any female would find it hot, kind of way. You put the cups on the counter and you noticed that Reid had grabbed the sugar. You watched as he did his normal pound of sugar and topped it off with coffee. You smiled as you made your own cup.

“Would you like some coffee with that sugar?” You joked towards him. He just gave you a mocking ‘haha’. You left the kitchen and went to your bedroom and got ready for the day. You were glad that you were able to do your entire makeup and morning routine in fifteen minutes, so you could always sleep in. You left your bedroom, dressed and with a go bag, because you never know how the day is going to go. What you didn’t know was that this was foreshadowing.

You and Spencer left your apartment and headed towards the car. It was a quiet car ride until Reid spoke up. 

“Y/N, I just realized that we are coming up on your one year with the BAU. Congrats”

“Has it really already been a year. It feels like just yesterday I walked into the unit and was greeted by you literally falling for me.” You said in a teasing tone.

“Morgan tripped me as a joke, I didn’t just ‘fall’. I still can’t believe that I spilled my coffee on you on your first day. I am still sorry about that.”

“Just think if you didn’t ruin my favorite shirt we wouldn’t be friends now.” You said teasingly, knowing that he would only pay attention to one part of your sentence.

“That was your favorite shirt!?!?” You could tell he felt bad. “I didn’t know that, oh my...”

You let out a laugh and looked over at him. His demeanor went from regret to calm as he figured o9ut that you were messing with him. 

“Very funny, I was this close to ordering you a new shirt like the one you had.”

“Oh, come on pretty boy, I have to mess with you sometimes, it can’t just be Morgan that gets to have all the fun.”

“Well if you want to go there, it is on Y/N”

You pulled into your parking spot and walked into the building ready for the day. Anticipating what you just started with Spencer.

***

You weren’t at your desk for more than a half hour when you were pulled into the round room with a new case. 

“We are headed to Las Vegas, NV.” JJ had started as she gave us the case files. You looked over at Spencer and noticed the smile he had, we were going to his hometown. “We have three woman dead. First we have Lara Lynch, age 32, she was found in her home, no sign of a struggle. Violet Mercado, 29, and local magazine model, was found with her face mutilated, almost unrecognizable. Lastly, we have Chloe Baldwin, 37, she was found in her law office.”

“These killings are so random, how do we know that it was all the same person?” Derek asked.

“They all had a letter carved into their chest. Lara, ‘E’, Violet, ‘P’, and Chloe, ‘G’. “

“Is the killer trying to spell out something? And what happened with Lara, why was there no struggle?” You said speaking out loud.

“Wheels up in 15”

***

When you had landed at Las Vegas, the team split up to go to the crime scenes. You were with Emily and were walking up to Lara’s door. You walked into the house and if you wouldn’t have seen the pictures of the crime scene you would have thought this was a normal lived in home.

“So why would Lara just let this guy in?” You started thinking out loud.

“She must have known him, or he was someone she would have trusted.”

You walked into the kitchen and noticed two glasses of water on the counter. 

“Must have been a friend or someone close to her, why else would she be getting a drink for them?” You said as you pointed towards the glasses on the counter. You then looked over at the shelves that lined the wall and saw the framed pictures. One of them stood out. It was of Lara and her husband. It looked like it was during their wedding, it was with them and what looked like the wedding party.

“Her husband is at the precinct right now. He was the one that found her.” 

“Emily look at this.” You pointed at the date on the picture. “This was two weeks ago, they had just gotten married.”

“So much for a honeymoon”

You walked around the rest of the house but couldn’t find anything that stood out. You decided to grab the photo from the wedding and bring it with you back to the precinct, you were holding it in the car and you couldn’t help but keep looking at it.

“Don’t you just love weddings? The amount of love just surrounding everyone.” Emily was trying to make small talk.

“Eh.” Your response took Emily by surprise. You decide to elaborate. “Don’t get me wrong, I love weddings, and I am all for romance, but if I am being honest, and what I am about to say is to not leave the two of us, I have never been in love before.” You don’t know why you were opening up about it, but with Emily it just felt right.

“Why?” 

“Love is scary for me. From what I have read and seen, it's all consuming, and the thought of giving yourself to someone and trusting them wholeheartedly is scary.”

“Very true, and it can be scary, but you shouldn’t hold yourself back from feeling love. It can be scary but when you are in love it is the closest thing I think to cloud 9.”

You were quiet for a bit, “Thanks Em.” 

***

When you got back to the precinct everyone was there.

“So Chloe was a real treat I guess.” Morgan started. “She was big into the dinner things in life and she was upcharging her clients to get the things that she wanted.”

“Wow, she sounds like a real treat, how did she ever have clients?” Rossi commented

“That's the kicker, she would only work with people with money, Which brings me to this, guess who worked with her?”

“Violet.” You said, confident, not so much questioning.

“You got it.”

“Speaking of Violet,” Rossi started. “According to her coworkers, she was a r4eal charmer. I guess she was narcissistic and thought that she was the center of the world.” 

“What about you Y/N? What did you find at Lara’s?” Hotch asked.

“She must have known the Unsub, there was no struggle and there were glasses on the counter like they were about to have a conversation. The only other thing that was of importance is this.” You said as you put the wedding photo on the table. “She just got married, and I mean just married, two weeks ago to be precise, which means she would have been married for a total of four days when she got murdered.” 

“So it started as a crime of passion.” Spencer said. “The Unsub was triggered by the recent marriage and ever since them is trying to make others around them pay for their ‘sins’”

It hit you like a freight train, you knew what it all meant. “That’s it! He is making them pay for their sins. Chloe, Greed, taking advantage of others to get the finer things in life. Violet, Pride, everything is about her and how she benefitted from everything. And the trigger of it all, Lara.”

“How is she a part of it?” Morgan asked.

“She is Envy.” Spencer stated.

“Exactly, The unsub wasn’t killing Lara for her sin, but it was the Unsubs sin. He couldn’t have Lara, he was envious.” It all started to click in everyone’s head. “We have to go talk to the husband, he knows who our unsub is. Someone call Garcia and have her cross reference the wedding party with our victims. There has to be someone that connects all of them.”

***

Within the next hour you had a name Myles Hickman, he was the best man, he had known Lara and her husband since college. After further research it was found out that Lara had worked at a local stripclub with both Chloe and Violet at one point. Myles had been a bartender at that same bar, he had a thing for Lara since college, but she turned him down early on. However, that didn’t stop him from having hope, that was until the wedding day, where it became apparent that he wasn’t going to get the girl. Garcia was able to pin Hickman’s phone and found out that he was approaching that exact stripclub. Everyone put two and two together. He was about to get the next sin in line, lust. 

The team had come up with a plan to get Hickman. 

“We have to get him by himself, we don’t know what he is capable of. The husband mentioned that Myles is an avid hunter and has had moments of being erratic.”

“So one of us should go undercover?” You asked.

“I don’t know if that's necessary.” Hotch answered.

“I think the kid is right. Someone should go under and try to lure Hickman out. We don’t know what he could do if we make a scene.”

“I’ll go.” You say. You look over at Spencer and he gives you a face of concern.

“Okay it’s settled. Y/N go get ready we are leaving in five minutes.” 

[fanficshiddles]

Be mine, one shot

Thank you for the prompt. Hope you likey :-)

laramoonworld submitted:

Hey there, I was wondering if you could make a one shot about a sexy vampire!King Loki searching for his soulmate. If you could use my name (Lara) I won’t mind hehe😋, but that’s up to you, kisses 😘

Warning: Kindapping, dub con. Not too NSFW though.

King Loki was pacing back and fore on his balcony, looking out over his kingdom. He had been antsy of late, feeling like he had an itch that couldn’t be scratched.

The sun had been down for an hour now, the moon was high in the sky and illuminating over the houses below his castle. He could see the hustle and bustle of the village as it came to life.

Anyone arriving to the desolate village during the day would think it was a ghost town. That was because it was the home of vampires. And Loki was the King vampire.

He did his best to keep his people happy and sated. But it wasn’t always easy. Less and less people were coming near the city now, after hearing about all the weird and sudden deaths that were happening. His hunters were having to go further afield to find fresh blood.

But lately, the King had been feeling rather lonely. He was yet to find his soulmate, but the yearning had grown so much stronger in the previous months. There was an almost constant burning under his skin. He knew that meant she was nearer than she had ever been before. But it was finding her that was the issue…

There was a knock on his chambers that tore him from his thoughts. He spun around, his dark green cape flowing out behind him as he marched over to the doors and opened them.

‘My King.’ One of his servants bowed. ‘We are ready to leave on your command.’

‘Very well. Let’s go.’ Loki nodded.

Loki and some of his men were traveling to the nearest city, to see if there was any sighting of his soulmate. He had heard that there were possibly some new vampires there, so it was worth a look.

Mounting his horse, he took lead for the group of ten vampires and they set off. It was a few hours ride away, so they planned to take back as much food as possible. But also without causing too much alarm, they didn’t want to scare the entire city away. Since it was their largest and closest food source.

Loki’s trusty steed never let him down. While he often just flew to his destinations, he enjoyed being at one with his horse. And they needed the horses to pull the carts of food back. Hoping to get enough for the entire village.

They arrived not long past midnight, which would hopefully give them enough time to gather food and for Loki to find his soulmate. If she was here. But he knew she was, he could feel it in his bones.

He had his men go off to find suitable food while he rode through the city for an hour. He used his vampire senses to guide him, in turn guiding his horse to where he needed to be.

And then, finally, he found her. At the very edge of the city, in a park.

But to his horror, she was a human. But he knew that was just a slight hitch, it wouldn’t take much to change her.

Lara was out for her usual late-night stroll. She always went to the park to watch the bats. They always fascinated her for some reason.

Oddly, she heard the sound of hooves coming along the gravel towards her in the park. She looked over and saw a man riding a horse coming into view, out of the darkness and into light.

He was the most breathtakingly beautiful man she had ever seen.

Yet, she felt a hint of danger and a chill run down her spine. Something was telling her to run, to get away from him. But another part of her was oddly drawn to him.

The stranger halted his horse a few feet away from her, and he dismounted. He was wearing all black, with a really dark green cape. He had long black hair and the most beautiful green eyes. He was very pale, but had a lovely face. Like a model.

He grinned at her as he approached. God, he was so tall too. She had to crane her neck to look up at him. Wait, why wasn’t she running? A stranger in the dark, the middle of the night, in weird clothing. And here she was, just standing there like she was stunned.

There was something fluttering around inside of her. She couldn’t put her finger on it though.

Loki wanted to pounce on her there and then. To kiss her sweet looking lips. To bite her… Turn her. Sink his teeth and cock into her at the same time… He mentally slapped himself, getting himself under control. This wasn’t like him, he was the King and always in control of his urges.

‘I’ve finally found you.’ He purred, reaching out to stroke her cheek with the back of his hand.

She looked unsure at first, but her skin did tingle under his touch. Even though he was wearing leather gloves, it still felt really intimate.

‘F… found me?’

The smell of fear, yet curiosity, reached Loki’s nostrils. He stepped in closer and took her hand, bringing it up to his mouth he kissed the back of it and then he turned her hand around. He couldn’t help himself from pressing his nose to her wrist and in-haling deeply. Letting out a moan, he had to dampen his urges down quickly again. She smelled absolutely divine. His fangs were already starting to come out of their own accord, wanting to take a bite.

He coughed and kept his lips closed, not wanting her to see his fangs. Not until he had her.

‘Who… who are you?’ She asked, trying to take her hand back but she found he wasn’t letting go.

‘My name is King Loki. What is your name?’

‘L… Lara... King? Of where?’

Loki grinned wickedly and slid his other hand through her hair. ‘So beautiful…’ He murmured low, making her eyes widen and heart flutter. But she was still unsure and a bit scared. ‘You will see. I am taking you back home with me.’

‘Wh… WHAT?’ She suddenly realised what he’d said and her eyes widened.

Lara tried to pull away, but Loki’s grip was too strong. ‘What are you doing? Let go of me! This is ridiculous!’ She screeched and tried hitting him, but it was as if he was being hit with a soft toy, he didn’t even flinch when she put her full strength into it.

‘You are coming with me, because it is our destiny.’ Was all Loki said as he dragged her towards his horse.

When they reached the horse, he stopped and looked at her. His green eyes pierced into her own, though she was sure she saw them changing colour slightly for a moment when he licked his lips.

‘Are you going to behave and get on the horse with me, or are you going to make it difficult for yourself?’ He asked, his tone calm.

‘Why the hell would I willingly go with you!’ She snarled and tried pulling free again.

Loki simply sighed, and with a flick of his wrist there was rope wrapped around both of her wrists, binding them together. The other end of the rope was attached to his horses saddle. She watched in horror as he mounted his horse and squeezed him on into a slow walk. She quickly realised she had no option but to walk along behind the horse, unless she wanted to be dragged through the mud of the park, since he decided not to stick to the path.

Loki didn’t push the horse on at a quick pace, it was quite a slow one. He didn’t want his love to be dragged. Just wanted to show her that the easier option will be to ride with him. Soon, she would realise they were meant to be together. But until then, he couldn’t let her out of his sight.

They’d barely reached the other side of the park when she changed her mind.

‘Stop, please. I… I will ride with you.’ She said, her voice quiet. But Loki’s radar ears picked it up easily. And his heart soared at her change of heart.

He got off the horse and put his hand out towards her. ‘Come.’ His command was simple but firm.

She knew there was no way out of this. He was obviously not human, with some weird magic ability. She wasn’t sure she wanted to find out if he had a nasty streak in him, so thought it best to do what he said.

Putting her hand into his, the rope around her wrists vanished and she was suddenly lifted up onto the horse. Loki mounted again behind her. So he was able to clamp an arm around her, holding onto her firmly in-case she tried to get away.

The ride back was quiet, Lara didn’t know what to say or do. She didn’t dare do anything. Loki had sent a message to his people, telling them he would meet them back home. He didn’t want them to scare her anymore than she already was.

When they came to the top of the last hill, Loki’s village came into view with his magnificent castle looming over it.

‘Wow.’ Lara gasped at the beauty of the place.

‘Welcome to your new home.’ Loki whispered into her ear, making her shiver for some reason… In a good way, a way she didn’t understand. She was being kidnapped for crying out loud!

But she was starting to struggle to remember that. She had started to enjoy feeling Loki’s arm around her and his body against her back. When they rode through the village, everyone bowed to their King. Some looked ravenous when they looked at her. But she didn’t understand why, exactly.

On arrival at the castle, there was someone waiting to retrieve the horse for Loki. When he slid off, he helped Lara down too. She was in too much awe at the castle to even think about attempting to run.

So she simply followed Loki inside, looking around at the place. Before she knew it, he had taken her to his chambers.

Then it hit her again, the situation she was in.

‘What am I doing here?’ She asked bravely, trying not to show how scared she felt.

‘Oh, my dove. Don’t be scared.’ Loki said softly, cupping her cheek. She had gone to move away from his touch, but instead found herself leaning into it and closing her eyes. Feeling a weird comfort in it.

‘Why… why are you making me feel… weird.’ She asked, her lower lip shaking slightly.

‘You feel it too?’ Loki asked, his voice full of hope and happiness.

‘What?’ She opened her eyes and looked up into the Kings eyes.

‘You, are my soulmate. And I am going to make you my Queen.’ He whispered and leaned down to kiss her forehead.

‘Wait… What?’ She gasped and stepped backwards from him.

Loki chuckled and took off his cape and gloves. He then grinned widely, his teeth on show, including his fangs.

‘Oh my god. You’re a… the rumours, they’re true!’ She screeched and so wanted to run for the door, but her legs wouldn’t let her.

‘Yes, they are. But you need not fear me. Vampires have soulmates, they only have one love. I’ve been waiting three thousand years to meet you, Lara. My soulmate.’ He moved in close to her again, his eyes turning a darker shade of green as he gripped her arms.

‘Are you… going to kill me?’ She squeaked.

Loki’s eyebrows shot up and he actually looked genuinely hurt that she would think that.

‘No, I am not. You’re my soulmate, Lara. Why would I do that? You are safe with me, and I know you can feel it.’ He stroked her hair and then slid his hand down to her neck, his fingers landing on her pulse point.

He licked his lips, thinking about sinking his teeth into that lovely neck of hers.

‘But I will need to bite you… To change you.’ He growled low.

‘WHAT?’

‘Shhhh. It won’t hurt, I can make it pleasurable.’ He said seductively and moved in on her, flicking her hair out of the way he attacked her neck with kisses and licks, making her moan almost instantly.

His left hand slid down her arm and he gripped her wrist, holding her pulse point there. He could feel the blood rushing through her veins. Just a little taste is all he needed for the change.

‘Be mine, Lara.’ He growled against her neck.

Lara was torn. Her mind at a battle with itself. This was so wrong, but so right at the same time. She was kidnapped, by a vampire no less. Who wanted to suck her blood? To change her? How could she trust him. Yet, she felt like she was home. Like she could trust him. Was it the connection he was on about, soulmates?

Loki moved his hand from her wrist to her hip, then he slid it down her front and between her legs. She gasped when he pressed firmly against her centre, even through her clothing he could feel her heat.

And she gave in.

‘Do it.’ She whimpered.

That was all that Loki needed to hear as he sank his teeth into her neck.

[rohobi]

Serendipity (Snack) | 07

pairing— jeon jungkook x reader, friendwithbenefitsAU  genre/warnings— smut, fluff, humour words—1540 .: just a sneakpeak ↳ CHAPTERS → CHAPTER 7

It's the tail end of summer in Seoul, and you hate it. Why? Because it's 30 degrees out and the massacre of "love bruises" all over your body from Jungkook's strange adventure last night has your body purple, blue and yellow. 

Jungkook calls them love bruises; aka hickies above all over hickies.

You personally think it's just the combination of anemia and JUNGKOOK PINNING YOU DOWN AND CONNECTING THE HICKIES. He said it would help with your cramps ...and you stupidly believed him.

Goddamn shark week, got you doing and thinking stupidly.

What would Jungkook know about cramps?

And what do you wear to cover up suspicious-looking bruises? His bloody jumper. The black one with the big white tick in the middle that smells like his shampoo. It's oddly reassuring to have his scent around you but wildly infuriating. The only reason why you're wearing it anyway is because you had fallen asleep at his house watching that new Netflix film to 'to all the boys who I've loved before' and you HAD TO COVER YOUR BODY WITH SOMETHING.

You wish he was as gentle as Peter.

Everyone deserves a Peter Kavinsky.

He, however, had thought differently.

Sulking under the sheets next to you, Jungkook grabs your chin, pulling your attention from the computer to him. "What do you even love about him? He's literally so average and he plays lacrosse, a game for pussies."

Slapping his hand away, you turn on your side to face him. "He writes love letters, posts cute pictures of Lara Jean on his Instagram, they talk and understand each other. Their chemistry is amazing and they hang out on Saturdays watching movies together!"

"WE DO THAT TOO?" Looking at you incredulously, he grabs the pillow from his side and smacks you with it. "What do you think we're doing right now too?"

You look at him and then at the computer over your shoulder. "You are no Peter Kavinsky, Jungkook. He's wholesome and romantic. You're sexual and perverted."

His face darkens before he shuffles under the sheets. Pushing you onto your back, he hovers above you, the candles on his bookshelf flicker a soft orange glow across his cute pouty face. "Am I not romantic? How am I not a Peter Carvan?"

"Its Kavinsky," Raising your hands to his waist, you rub the soft exposed skin. "He's cute and he radiates big dick energy at the same time. It's a possible impossible. You're you, a poo."

Slumping his complete weight on you, he wraps his arms around you. "You're mean to me, I'm cute, come on! I'd out romance Peter any day!"

Sinking into his duvet covers, you spread your legs so he can lay between them. "Jungkook, get off me, I can feel your dick."

He goes stiff for the tiniest of seconds before lifting his face from your chest to smirk at you. "And that is one thing I'll always have over Peter big dick Carvanisky."

You cock an eyebrow at him. "What? That I can feel your penis and not his? Why don't you believe in me? I could make it happen! We're the same age in real life."

"No, not happening," Pushing his hips against yours, he bites his bottom lip. "Not while I'm still breathing."

Looking at his face, you sigh. "Peter Kavinsky has set the bar for my non-existent love life. You can't look at me like that and tell me that the movie thus far, doesn't want to make you love again."

Jungkook growls, shifting his face into the crook of your neck to kiss your neck. "What do you mean non-existent love life? You have one with me Y/N and come on, the movie hasn't even finished yet. For all we know, they could break up after he cheats on her with Gen."

Gasping, you push him completely off you. "In that case, get under the blankets and stop kissing me. We're finishing it. I don't give a shit if it's 3 AM," Shifting beside you, he pulls you against his chest and moves the computer in front of you. "We're watching this, okay?"

"As you wish."

Nuzzling his nose into the nape of your neck, your heart softly hums as you try to watch the rest of the movie without falling into a comfortable sleep.

And you hate how you never got to see if he did cheat on Lara Jean with Gen because Jungkook's warmth and comfort had lulled you to sleep anyway, and in the morning, you were LIVID AT THE COLOUR OF YOUR NECK AND YOUR COLLARBONE and the empty space where his stupid face should be beside you.

He had escaped.

And with his escape, your alarm on his phone never went off.

You're running across campus in Jungkook's nike jumper when you're accosted by a group of girls out of the blue for the first time since Jungkook had publicly kissed you in class. You hadn't had time to even put on perfume or brush your hair, afraid you'd be late to your lecture.

"Who do we have here?" a girl chuckles, stepping close to you.

It's been days of going the long and less populated route to avoid these confrontations but you knew this was bound to happen, how could it not?

"Y/N." Their ring linger says. "Where have you been? It's like you've disappeared off the face of the planet!"

You step back. "Nope, I've been w-where I usually am. W-why?"

They're red lipstick devils as they surround you with their various types of luxury handbags and pointed gazes. Is this the campus mafia? Are they going to beat me up? How may I help you on this beautiful day-

"-cut the shit Y/N, we only want to know one thing from you," Claudia Kim says, stepping forward. Her short black hair and knife-sharp eyeliner make you feel intimidated as you stare at anything but her eyes. "I don't want to hear anything else."

"Don't stand too close, I haven't brushed my teeth," You stammer, putting your hands up to cover your chest. She watches you do it, rolling her eyes at the ridiculousness. "What do you need to know? Are you here to steal my lunch money because I don't have any."

"No, what are you 5?"

You gasp. "You steal from 5-year-olds?!"

"No, god. Stop. You weren't responding to our messages, so..." She steps forward until you can feel her breath against your face. "I just want to know one damn thing. What are you dressing up as for Jungkook's September Halloween party?"

Expecting the worst, you immediately beg for mercy. "Don't hurt me, I'm too sensitive and I'm anemic so the bruises will last longer and ...wait," you look back up at her. "Wait, what? Party? Costume? No beatdown?"

"Do you want one?" another girl giggles.

"Of course not," you whisper.

"We want to know what your costume is so we don't dress up the same, silly," Claudia pats your hair. You aren't sure if she's being genuine at the moment, so you falter, sinking into yourself under her touch. "We're all going in our lingerie as sexy kittens."

Your mouth falls open. The image is wonderful. "Oh right, damn. I thought you were going to beat me up. I don't know yet, I was thinking of going as something stupid like a slice of cheese."

The girls all stare at you. "Are you kidding?"

"...it's dress up ...is it not? Plus, it's not even Halloween so who cares," feeling awkward, you rub the back of your head. "So, you aren't going to beat me up?"

"Why did you think we'd beat you up?" Claudia giggles, wrapping her around yours as she pulls you towards the campus cafe. You reluctantly let her drag you away from the general direction of your classes. "Why would we do that?"

"I don't know because of Jungkook?"

She snorts, pulling you to face her. "You are someone special to him, if we want him, we'll treat you well. What is this? The 90's? Girl, we don't fight girls, we fight stupid."

"Damn, didn't expect that one. Serena is not going to believe this."

Walking you in the direction of the cafe, they all excitingly tell you their costume plans for the party. You're confused the entire time. The way they communicate with each other is so interesting. Their lips move but nothing with depth falls out. It's all incredibly superficial and you're so into it.

Feeling included, you ask. "Should I come as a sexy kitten too?" and the girls giggle looking you up and down.

"You got any sexy lingerie?"

One of the girls snickers. "I doubt it, look at her."

"No way, would she have any."

"Who would find a mono boob sexy?"

Listening to their shallow blows, you smirk at the girls. "Not sure if I have any sexy lingerie, I'd have to ask Jungkook. He finds me sexy in everYTHING I WEAR. So, anyway, I gotta run. Lovely running into you girls. See you at the party tonight or whenever it is!"

Claudia laughs loudly. "If you need any, I'm a phone call away! You have my number."

You smile awkwardly at Claudia.

"Um yeah, thanks!"

[ayearofpike]

The 2010s reprints, all at once

So if Simon & Schuster is going back to the well for Pike’s vampire books, what’s stopping them from bringing back other stories from their one-time best-selling young adult author? Form factor, perhaps. It’s the twenty-first century now, and no self-respecting teen would be caught dead reading a pocket-sized paperback. We need something big and beefy to show that we’re Serious About Literature even as we read about murderous insane girls. Fortunately, he’s written more than a couple continuations that will link together into a handy packaged bind-up. But a lot of these books were originally written twenty years ago or more, when the absence of technology and communications wasn’t something that needed to be addressed to explain why these bastards weren’t better informed. Indeed, new audiences (the ones we in education call “digital natives”) might not even understand the characters’ rationales for action without being able to step back in time and forget what they take for granted.

Is it worth rereading these new editions? How different are they from the originals? Lucky for you, I’ve decided to find out.

Remember Me

Compiles Remember Me, The Return, and The Last Story Simon Pulse, 2010 789 pages ISBN 978-1-4424-0596-7 LOC: PZ7.P626 Re 2010 OCLC: 646299604 Released July 6, 2010 (per B&N)

Since this was the magical bestseller that made Pike who he was in the first place, it shouldn’t be too surprising that not much is changed or updated in this edition. Still, the very nature of the YA market having morphed into the vehicle that allows these stories to be reprinted throws a pretty massive wrinkle (like, even worse than the fact she’s publishing under her white name) into Shari’s expectation that her mom will never read Remember Me. Come on, dude — I guarantee she already read about the vampires. 

The only changes I found through all three stories were giving Lenny the Latino gangbanger a CD player rather than a cassette (because 2010), saving the final story on a jump drive rather than a floppy disk (again, 2010), and swapping Shari’s green pants for blue jeans (I guess to match the outfit Jean is wearing when she falls off the balcony?). One thing that hasn’t changed: Third Book Whitewashin’ Shari is still an asshole. You’re lucky I’m so determined to be thorough, otherwise I would have never reread this shit.

To Die For

Compiles Slumber Party and Weekend Point, 2010 408 pages ISBN 978-0-545-26432-1 LOC: not listed OCLC: 679759450 Released September 1, 2010 (per B&N)

Little weirdness here, as this is a Scholastic joint rather than Simon & Schuster, but the covers are all coordinated, down to the typeface. Not sure whether the two houses worked together to try to sell their books (at Pike’s agent’s suggestion?) or whether Point saw an opportunity to mine some back catalog and tried to copy the existing presentation as close as possible.

The oldest viable stories (read: not Cheerleaders) must have some major rewrites pending for a modern audience, you’d think, but it’s not that drastic. The main complication would be these kids being able to reach someone outside the immediate group and report problems, so Pike quickly writes around that with a single line in each story establishing the locale as beyond cell service. They also both turn emergency CB radios into walkie-talkies, which isn’t even close to the same thing. It’s a little hinky at times, especially in accepting that Lara Johnson has packed an alarm clock instead of a phone, but it does the job.

Most of the rest of the changes hinge on contemporary references. Slumber Party loses its Richard-Pryor-lighting-himself-aflame-while-freebasing joke, but keeps the kids watching Dr. Zhivago at the first fateful party. Weekend has to adjust a lot more — party music is no longer on record, David Bowie becomes Bono (replacing a ten-year-old reference in 1985 with a ten-year-old reference in 2010), Angie’s Datsun is now a Camry, and song leaders are finally just cheerleaders. At times, he’s just wiped out a reference altogether: gone are Pat Benatar, Ryan O’Neal and Ali McGraw, Fonzie, Michael Jackson, and most tragically the Carpenters, which undoes a joke at Sol’s expense and removes any understandable sense from the passage they once were in. Oh well. At least he spelled “gringo” correctly in this edition.

Until the End

Compiles the Final Friends trilogy (The Party, The Dance, and The Graduation) Simon Pulse, 2011 846 pages ISBN 978-1-4424-2252-0 LOC: PZ7.P626 Unt 2011 OCLC: 693810612 Released August 30, 2011 (per B&N)

I’ll be honest: I’m not sure what this compilation is doing here. Did anybody clamor at the bit for Final Friends even back in the day? I mean, there must have been some demand to let our boy write a trilogy, but even as a teenager I saw the problems embedded in this tale. Simple time-shifting adjustments weren’t gonna fix those. And this is the beefiest book of the lot, maybe to appeal to young readers who like the huge format and want to show off how much they can read. (I had it in the waiting room of my kid’s doctor this week and another dad said it was the biggest book he’d ever seen.) It’s a lot to plow through for the sake of completeness. Still, we’re committed, right?

I got like 200 pages in and did not see a single change — not even in the computer lab where Bubba is “hacking” into the district grade data bank — which made me worried I was going to just be rereading the same stories over again. And 650 pages later, GUESS WHAT. Literally the only difference is that Jessica, in bemoaning her travails with Bill, says she was “trying to seduce a gay guy” instead of merely “a gay.” Like, even the part about it taking all day to transfer 40 megabytes via modem and filling up a school computer’s hard drive is still there. This was NOT done for new fans. But reading it so fast and soon and smushed together did help me realize that The Rock does indeed have a given name. (I’ll save you the research time: Theodore Gordon.)

Bound to You

Compiles Spellbound and See You Later Simon Pulse, 2012 490 pages ISBN 978-1-4424-5971-7 LOC: PZ7.P626 Bo 2012 OCLC: 777602521 Released August 7, 2012 (per B&N)

Maybe this is the only bind-up where the two stories could have been anything. (The Point book: those were his only two under Scholastic, so it makes sense.) There’s a back catalog of literally two dozen books not otherwise committed that they could compile. So why these two together? OK, sure, we’re four years away from the phrase “sexy lizard teens” entering the lexicon, but for sure Scavenger Hunt is better paired with Spellbound than a story about nuclear war survivors time traveling out of regret. See You Later seems like a really obtuse deep cut to me, but if he was committed to it why not pair it with The Midnight Club, which is similarly about love lost to inevitable death? I don’t really see the connection, and am too lazy to do any rationale research. But I’m not actually mad at the books — they’ve shown as two of my favorites in this reread. 

Spellbound, being the oldest of the S&S catalog, does need a little reworking, particularly in the racist elements of an African shaman going to a podunk Old West high school. Pike didn’t take them all out, of course, because we have to know what a dick the boyfriend is by his connection of the dude to savage cavemen. However, the lack of cell phones is very glaring in the bits where they’re trying to find the brother/potential murder victim, and Cindy has to sit around the hospital waiting to be paged. In 2012 it’s inconceivable that high school kids wouldn’t have SOMETHING. You tried to reach the brother at his house, at his friend’s, at his girlfriend’s ... did you call him directly? Such a simple fix: “He’s not answering his cell.” It probably would have made the unease even stronger.

See You Later, hinging as it does on the main character understanding a video game, has its own needs for updating, and does it better than the Final Friends remake. Still, it’s a little slapdash. Becky works in an electronics store instead of a record store, but do these places even sell physical media computer games anymore? Even six years ago that shit was all download-only. And Ray STILL works in a bookstore ... do those still exist? Mervyn’s definitely doesn’t; they went bankrupt in 2008. As for the game itself, it requires 12 gigs of RAM rather than the paltry megabyte, which is what my newish machine runs six years later. (At the time I had ... two gigs?) Also, in the original Mark asked who won the 2010 World Series, which isn’t the future anymore in 2012 ... but it’s weird that he’s now asking about 2020, just eight years off rather than twenty. Most unsettling, though, is how the tenor of international violence rhetoric still rings true for the setting of this story, even though we’re not worried about Communists anymore. The Cold War is long over, but we’ve swung through tolerance and hope and are right back on fear.

Chain Letter

Compiles Chain Letter and The Ancient Evil Simon Pulse, 2013 456 pages ISBN 978-1-4424-7215-0 LOC: PZ7.P626 Ch 2013 OCLC: 852941511 Released July 23, 2013 (per B&N)

Chain Letter was also not originally published by S&S, so it’s interesting that they’ve gotten the rights to print it in this volume. (Though they were compiled in the UK in 1994, so maybe it wasn’t too hard.) By now, though, it feels like they’re reaching, as the teen fiction world shifts yet again to futuristic dystopias and Pike doesn’t really have anything like that. Thirst was on its way out too; the fifth book appeared just before this, and we’ll note that even though Pike didn’t finish the story the sixth has yet to emerge. Curse you, unpredictable teen girls!

Not too much is different from the original editions here. Obviously Pike was throwing in his timely references that had to be cut for understandability (Nastassja Kinski?), but by Chain Letter 2 he’d learned to rein that in. Also, there’s a moment in the first one where Alison yells “Hate you!” at the attacking Caretaker, which always struck me as awkward. This version changes it to “Screw you!” which makes me think Pike originally wrote it as “Fuck you!” and had to bowdlerize for YA. Of course they have to throw some shade at snail mail, too, since that’s how the letters arrive in the first place. 

But the main differences are cassette recorders and phones. Obviously the kids aren’t going to tote around a whole bunch of old-school tools when we are now six years into the smartphone era. There’s some nice cleaning up in The Ancient Evil, writing around the idea that people need to (or even CAN) look numbers up in the phone book, but in lots of cases it just makes things awkward. Like, why is Joan going after the driving controls to turn the incriminating recording off if it’s on Kipp’s phone in the backseat? Why do Alison and Brenda have to sit around the kitchen waiting for a return call? Why is Kipp waiting until he gets home to check his voicemail? Did he seriously leave his phone in his room while he ran to the store and left a seven-year-old sister alone at the house? It just makes less and less sense.

You might have seen somewhere online a mention of another compilation, collecting Last Act and Master of Murder. This book does not actually exist. The ISBN and OCLC numbers associated with the title both lead to a British printing of the second half of Final Friends, by Hodder Publishing. I emailed the house just to make sure I wasn’t missing anything, and they responded that they’ve never printed these two stories together. There’s no record of it anywhere else, certainly not on Simon & Schuster’s Pike page, and reviews I’ve found where people have attempted to buy this collection attest to the fact that they’ve actually received a copy of Final Friends Part 2 But Not Book 2 Even Though the Second Half of Book 2 Is In It.

There also used to be another one named on Wikipedia called Time of Death, which was supposed to compile Bury Me Deep and Chain Letter, but why the hell would they do that when Chain Letter has its own sequel already? There’s not any verifiable record of such a book anywhere online, not even a flawed cross-listing like the first. 

So fuhgeddaboudit. I’m done reading compilations.

[xreader-collection]

One Night: Part 1

Includes: Social awkwardness, no smut yet (I know I can’t wait either) a lot of set up

WC: 1800 - short and sweet, like Tom

Note: I don’t know if I need to apologize for so much set up, but I’m Canadian what am I supposed to do its in my blood. So I’m so sorry for the set up, but I hope its written well enough that you don’t care. 

Note Note: this y/n has more confidence than I intended. I don’t know what happened.

Teaser |Part 1|

That night you didn't sleep. You spent your time thinking of every possible scenario that might have played out, if only you had stayed. Alas, your friend needed help, and you weren't heartless. You could hear Lara fiddling around in the kitchen no doubt trying to make late night microwave brownies. It was a pattern...

Finally you gave in to your insomnia and opened your phone, the light blazing green patches into you vision. “great” you adjusted and began flipping through your social media. Friends, gossip, cute cats, new spider-man movie, aunts wedding... wait.. you scroll back desperately.

“Hold on just a fucking second!”

What you thought was an internal thought was indeed the very opposite. You hear Lara yell back “WHY”  Potentially about to hit start on her midnight microwave madness. You scramble to your feet and scurry into the kitchen.

“Lara! Lara, you're not going to believe this.”

“My god y/n why are you yelling, its like four in the bloody morning” Lara reluctantly give you her attention

“ I saw this guy right? And we locked eyes and it was all... all... “ you struggle with the words

“what”

“fuck I don't know Lara... sexy?”

“Yeah ok so you got some Looks on ya, you weren't exactly dressed like a nun” she begins to turn back to her precious treat, as you grab her arm.

“No no no- ok ok but look at this guy” you hold up your phone, a picture of Tom Holland mid interview. “That's him!”

You both stare into the silence between you. Your expectant stare being met with a clearly unimpressed Lara. She breaks the silence “That's bullocks, and you know it”

“Oh come on you don't believe me?!”

“you've gone mad if you think you saw the Tom Holland in our shitty little club”

You let out an aggravated sigh. “fine”

I'll just prove it then. You return to your bed, wide awake. You needed to know everything...

- - -

At some point that morning you had fallen asleep, face plastered to your screen in a loving embrace. You woke up and were immediately grateful you hadn't been caught drooling by anyone. You opened your phone to a picture of Tom Holland standing on plush carpet and seemingly in some ballet pose, his shirt wide open revealing his beautiful body. You let out a hushed sigh. Wow. You weren't exactly sure when you fell asleep, but judging by your search history and the state of your bed, you had fallen asleep... satisfied...

You got ready and looked at the time realizing you were going to be late. Today you'd be having lunch at Cote Brasserie in Kingston with your family. And of course you looked no where near ready.

20 minutes later you called your Mum from the cab “Sorry Mum! My alarm didn't go off. I'll be there in 10! I promise!” On the other end you heard your Mum scoff. Maybe it had been the fact that you were late to her birthday celebration, or maybe it was the fact you had no boyfriend and hadn't gone to college yet...

You paid the cabby generously for his potentially dangerous wheel work, and composed yourself on the way to the door. Walking in the place smelled like many things that touched your slightly hung over senses with a bit more gusto than you would have liked, and your expression had given that away.

“y/n its one thing to arrive late but you might want to behave like you want to be here” your father said lovingly as he stood to hug you. He then looked into your eyes with a knowing, fatherly frown, and whispered “Try not to act hung over, dear”

“Yes dad..” You greeted the rest with as much joy as you could muster.

- - -

When the meal came to and end you Stood with the rest of them throwing a long coat over yourself. As you flipped your hair out of the collar, you looked up to see a booth. Sat in it were 4 boys and who must have been their parents. You glanced away for a moment making a move to leave, but it was when you looked back that you saw him. The oldest of them laughing with the youngest, that same full body laugh. And his eyes come up to meet yours “oh fuck”

Your dad looks back “LANGUAG- Oh whats happened, are you alright y/n?” you must have been pale.

You laugh nervously trying not to be to loud “ yeah don't mind me, just.. be right back... gotta... ” you were at a loss for words “I’ll catch up” and with that, you ran to the washroom.

You looked at yourself in the mirror, heart racing. So soon? What the ever-loving fuck y/n you're a mess today. He can't see me like this. Why didn't I run the OTHER way. You whine in frustration, straitening your hair. Phooo c'mon y/n you've done it now. Calm down.

Thinking you'd psyched yourself up for the simple task of casually waving at him while you left the restaurant, you reached for the door, and with every thump of your heart it seemed to move slower. 

Looking at the floor as you left the room, your head bumped into something.. no... someone... shit...“oh god sorry” his voice came out with a casual softness. He rested his hands firmly on your arms steadying you. “are you alright?” with hesitation you raise your head, your eyes at the level of one very defined jawline.

Does he recognize me?

His eyes were a deep brown, and it made his air even calmer, laid back, and welcoming. Just when you resigned to the idea that he didn't recognize you, his expression changed, his grip loosened. “you look... familiar.”

At those words you flashed back to the previous night, and with the memory of his stare, you felt your body heat up. Without a thought, that same devious grin you showed him the night before, crept across your face. “ you look familiar too”

Oh man..

You saw the cogs turning in his mind, and you could have sworn you saw the moment he remembered a scantly clad girl eyeing him from across the muggy room of a night club, intent on having him. He inhaled sharply, his cheeks turning red. “O-oh.. Hello” he let his hands drop to his sides his eyes frantically taking you in. “y-your the...” He swallowed hard and you saw his jaw clench, betraying his nerves.

You knew who you'd seen last night; a confident young man with devilish thoughts, and a gaze that conveyed them... vividly. This was no doubt the same boy, those curls, that smile... Who knew he'd had a softer side. So nervous. 

Oh I'm gonna eat him up.

After a moment he shook from the stare and stumbled through a sentence. “I'm going back..” what? You must have looked confused because he elaborated “to the- the club I mean... me and my mate Harrison.”

The conversation went slowly, but gained confidence as the two of you began to fall back into the head space of the night before. “Are you asking me out?” your grin deepened as you stepped closer to him, the heat of your bodies rushing to meet in the air between you. You continued “because I don't even know your name yet” Lies! Bad y/n! As you finished your sentence you reached into is front pocket where you had seen his phone. He took another sharp inhale, he was cute when surprised You swiped it open and began to text yourself.

He let out a breath a little more heated than the moment before. “Tom”

You licked your lips subtly “Ok Tom...” You slipped his phone back into his front pocket slowly. “I'll see you there, text me” You slid past him towards the door. You could feel his eyes on you, and continued walking to meet your family. You couldn't help but smile while you imagined his face reading the text you'd send yourself along with your name.

-------------------------

Thanks for reading! leave an ask if you want more! -Kea

[supershrinkingviolet]

You Don’t Know How You’ve Betrayed Me || Self

Violet gave a small sigh as she finished getting ready for the day. She wished she was still in sweatpants and curled up in bed. She wished she was wearing one of her oversized hoodies and her comfortable jeans. (Even in her own head she couldn’t go so far as to think that ‘anything’ would be better than what she was currently wearing, but the fact that she had to qualify even that much to herself was telling). The truth of the matter was that she just didn’t want to go to work. Having to get dressed for work was too much like admitting she was going to have to be there.

She was stuck. She was completely stuck in the case and she knew it. It didn’t matter what angle she tried to work, how many times she tried to talk to the father, he wasn’t budging and nothing she was doing was making a difference. Lara wasn’t going to get the kind of justice she deserved. Andy was going to be left uncertain and grieving for the rest of his life. And she would have proven to herself that she was a failure.

Fuck she hated this. When she’d been recruited for her skills at shield charms, she’d assumed she would be working some sort of protective detail. Training. Being partnered while somebody else headed investigations and mostly just being in the line of fire to protect the more important aurors the Ministry wanted to keep around. She’d never anticipated having to bear this much weight alone, especially on so little training. Lara deserved better than this. But she was all there was to give.

She knew her family was worried about her. She was eating better than she had in school, but all this physical activity meant that she was dropping weight at an alarming rate. And she didn’t actually have that much to lose. Her mind was constantly racing, constantly focused on the case, but it meant it was hard for her to hold a conversation in the moment (unless it was about books or comic books, and then she could usually pull herself back together). Her sleep pattern was all over the place as she either went through the day on only 3 hours of sleep or slept over 12 hours. She had no appetite to speak of, and most things had started to taste faintly metallic. She knew she should be worried. She knew that she was in a bad state. She knew that she was running herself into the ground with basically nothing to show for it. She just didn’t care.

Gardner was the only one who wasn’t saying much. Oh sure, he’d make the occasional comment. But it was all simple things. ‘Get some sleep Parr.’ ‘You got this?’ ‘Did you check out this angle?’ Just normal work stuff, and the job of working the case. Of course, in name it was his case. He was technically the lead investigator, and if it went unsolved, the mark would be on his record. But both of them knew that in the end, she had claimed this case as hers.

Violet was shaken out of her thoughts by the sound of an owl knocking at her window. Curiously, she looked over. It was a Great Horned Owl, and not one she recognized. But it must be Jack-Jack using one of the school owls. Who else would possibly be writing her? Especially at this time?

The first hints of trepidation came when she looked at the envelope.

Violet Parr

The handwriting was unfamiliar and more feminine than anyone’s she knew. There were no blots or mistakes, so the person wasn’t particularly emotional as she wrote the letter, but was also clearly skilled. It spoke of confidence and authority. Slowly she took a sniff. Vanilla and lavender twined together, overpowering the scent of the ink (high quality). Under that was the scent of a stranger. What was a stranger doing writing her a letter? At home?

She opened the letter, trying to swallow around a nervous ball in her throat. And then the import of the message struck her and everything else stopped.

Dear Violet Parr, You have been recommended for mandatory psychiatric evaluation following the events of some of your recent cases. Come to 1800 Ravenbriar Avenue, London on January 12 at 11 am. Everything said in this session or any sessions following will be completely confidential. I look forward to speaking with you.       Dr. Jennifer Hayes

Recommended? Based on cases?

Gardner.

Fucking Gardner.

Violet didn’t pause to think, wasn’t capable of thinking beyond the wave of rage and betrayal that swept through her. He was the only person who could potentially shove her back into therapy based on work, and he was the last person she’d expected to ever do something like that. What right did he have? What goddamn right to put her back there?

She didn’t remember the journey from her home to work. Later she would probably have to think about what she’d looked like to people she’d passed on the street, but right now she had no idea if she’d passed anyone at all. She had eyes only for her boss sitting calmly at his desk. The boss she’d trusted. The boss who hadn’t thought it worth noting that he was going to make her visit yet another goddamn therapist without talking to her about it first.

“What the fuck is this?”

Vi didn’t swear at work. Normally she didn’t swear. Professional standards and trying to live up to her hero and all of that. But the old rules didn’t really apply in the moment.

Gardner looked up at her and almost straight into the letter she had shoved in his face. His expression barely changed, but Violet had watched him enough to see him putting on his ‘work’ poker face that meant he didn’t want to give anything away. The realization only infuriated Violet more. “Ah. I see you got Jen’s letter.”

“And I want to know what the bloody hell it means.”

“I’d think that is pretty clear.”

“’Mandatory psychiatric evaluation following the events of some of your recent cases.’ So basically because I’m fucking up handling Lara’s case I have to have someone else poke at me until they’re satisfied that I’m not going to slit my wrists in the bathtub.”

Vi saw the first flicker of something in his eyes. A little bit of shock and frustration before he snapped his shield back in place, and she felt a perverse sort of pleasure in it. Damn right he should be affected by what he’d done to her.

“You’re not sleeping Violet,” he snapped. “You can’t shut off the case and the guilt is eating you alive. Normally aurors are taught coping skills for this, but you haven’t been, so I’m sending you to someone who can. And especially with your history – “

At those words, Vi froze. “My history.”

She couldn’t say what she looked like, but whatever it was was enough to have the man pausing before he gentled his tone. “You know me. Do you really think I’d have anyone working under me without getting their school and hospital records?”

No. No she didn’t. But she’d hoped. She’d hoped because he so rarely looked at her with the same fragile mix of fear and pity that most other people had around her – especially adults. She’d hoped because she’d wanted this to be a fresh start where she could be accepted entirely on her own merits. She’d hoped because she’d wanted the chance to be Violet Parr, auror, instead of Violet Parr, the fucked up suicidal they were stuck with. And once again, she was getting pushed into something she didn’t want because of actions she couldn’t really control. She was only ever going to be the kid that needed therapy.

He paused for a moment, as if waiting for some sort of response, but she was too numb to be able to say anything. “Look. Dr. Hayes is one of the best. She works with the aurors, and sometimes she helps on cases. You can talk about the case to her, talk about anything else, and it doesn’t go anywhere. Not even back to me.”

Maybe not. But he still knew that he’d sent her. And she would know that too. And worse, so much worse, he hadn’t said anything to her about it. He just did it. Maybe it wouldn’t have gone any better if he tried to talk to her about it, maybe they still would have been fighting about it, but she wondered if she would feel this hurt.

“You had no right,” she said quietly.

“I’m your boss. It’s my job to keep you together so you can do the job.”

“I may work for you, but I am still mine.” Vi took a deep breath as fury began to cover the hurt until she could deal with it privately. “My brain is mine. My thoughts and feelings are mine. You have no right to force me back into some fucking office with yet another goddamn person who wants to poke and prod at everything until they can get me into their neat little boxes or fucking fix me. I don’t care that you’re my boss. I don’t care that you’re Andrew Gardner, best auror on the force and recognized maverick. You had. No. Right.”

Turning around, Vi stormed away from the desk, just wanting to get out into the open air before she did something pathetic like break down in tears and only confirm all of his worst thoughts about her.

“Parr, where are you going?” his voice cracked like a whip behind her.

Violet paused at the door, glaring back at him. “Out. I have a job to do. And apparently I’ve got an appointment on Thursday.” And with that, she turned and left.

[sixthousandninehundredmiles]

11/30/2017

Today was an eventful but average day. I woke up around 9 to add in last minute details to my powerpoint presentation. My team didn’t really meet up to talk about who is talking about what. They just said we’ll each talk about the slides that we made but I’m not sure if they considered that our slides may still share the similar info. I set an alarm for 9am so that I would have extra time to prep and get to school. I still managed to almost be late LOL I walked into class about 2 minutes before class started and my group was already up front waiting for me. We were presenting first. Good thing is that there are 10 teams in the class. Our company choices were General Motors, Honda, and Tesla. We were 1 of 2 teams to choose GM and also first to go. So we had more room for error and we wouldn’t be in the awkward position if our information clashed with the other team because we went first. There was no tax class today so I left school early.

Van was coincidentally leaving school at the same time because he had some stuff to do. We ended up getting a bite at Chipotle. I haven’t had it in so long and omg it’s so good! What have I been missing out on this past semester? Look at that beautiful bowl of deliciousness…mmmmmmmm. We hit the gym shortly after. First time we both went to the gym but worked out separately. I wasn’t expecting to run into him at school today so I had my own workout plans. I was just going to work out all my muscles lightly so they aren’t tense or tight before the tournament and I did just that. Van’s plan was to work out lightly such as push ups and sit ups. Left him for about an hour and came back to him panting and sweating…idiot did a legit work out and his knee is already bad gdi. I seriously hope we’ll be fine on Sunday LOL

My plan after getting home was to put up the Christmas tree but my dad had already done so. I told him last night and this morning that I would do it after I came home but I guess he wanted it out of the way? Oh well, less work for me.

Dinner was pretty good! There were sweet and sour pork ribs, one of my favorite foods at home. Mood was fine until dad started talking to me. Basically he’s talking about how I should study more about taxes because it’ll be one of my essentials when I start being a real accountant…keep in mind he doesn’t know how I’m doing in class. And then he’s like shouldn’t you find this stuff interesting if it’s your field? Do you find it interesting? I’m like no…no one in accounting class finds tax interesting. We are taking it because we need to. Then I guess he kinda snapped and was like so why are you studying accounting then? And all this bs about how I should do what I want and that I need to work harder. Something along the lines of if I wanna take life easy, I should move to Hawaii because jobs are basic and income is low but enough for a simple life…idk and a bunch of other bs where I just wanted to snap that I do things a certain way because I care about what he thinks of me. And I am held back on certain years because I decided to work for him or Costco because he told me to. And I just wanted to storm out and scream. And then he said stuff like why don’t you come home earlier at night and also wake up earlier. You’ll accomplish more this way. Stop spending your time with losers. They’ll only drag you down. That’s when he got up and started cleaning up the dinner table. I did a bit but I think a tear was about to fall from my eye so I just walked away. After he went upstairs to his office, I texted Peter, Jhoii, and Lara that I was going bowling and stormed out.

I ended up just bowling by myself. Peter was already at open rec. Lara wasn’t feeling well. Jhoii was getting food with her friend. Not that I minded I guess. I could chill there with a cup of 805…that first game of 205 and that shitty frame pissed me off. I bowled about 6 games until my finger was swollen and basically wouldn’t go into the ball anymore. And then Jhoii ticked me off when I told her I was leaving. She asked if I could buy her wine. I didn’t mind and she’s like oh I don’t think you’re gonna make it to Walmart because they’re closing soon. I’m like ok well what’s the plan. She’s like idk lemme know if you find anything that’s still open and sells wine. I’m like woman…I ain’t your bitch, your bf, and you are about to lose the friend part if you keep this up. I just told her idk any and went home…

Started packing for Davis when I got home. Don’t remember what it’s like to play a tournament lol. I forgot how many shirts I should be packing and what else I need to bring. That paper you see is the form for me to be authorized to drive…yes after 4 years on this team, I am finally one of the drivers…and of all places to fucking Davis.

Can’t tell if today was a bad or good day…I guess it just averages out…