#obsessed with this rendition of sheo

[luckydxy]

11. Explain the origins of your muse. Why did you choose them? What’s your focus with this character?

Munday Asks ;; Accepting

Yes !! I love telling this story !!

Ara was my first oc & has been through dozens of renditions since I was a young teen. Her first rp rendition was in the dc comics rpc - more specifically the batman / gotham rogues gallery. I was tiptoeing my way into rp & got to know a bunch of Riddler rpers. There were .... so so so many of them. I'm sure there still are, but I think the original group I wrote with are either long gone or moved onto greener pastures.

Ara was originally crafted for the soul purpose of pissing off the Riddler. I wanted her to be clever enough keep up, but naive enough to continue getting into trouble. She wouldn't solve the puzzle traps through the traditional means - he'd tell her a riddle & she'd be like : well, actually, I have a screwdriver so I'll just go ahead & fuck up your dumb trap from the inside out. It was loads of fun. I plotted out a lot of completely ridiculous & unhinged bs with a few Eddie's & she even befriended some. But that's where her origin as an annoying sneak thief really kicked off & stuck.

After my Gotham rogues gallery obsession I hit a pretty bad depression spell & got really ..... really ..... really into Skyrim. It was the only game I touched for four years straight. Ara meshed in pretty well with TES as a thief & she became a footpad for the Thieves Guild. I didn't know very much about TES as a whole back then, but my Uncle gifted me his copy of Oblivion & the official guide ; which I treasure because my Uncle is disabled & very ill - he gifted me these things because he was no longer able to play anymore & it upset him even keeping them in the house. So Oblivion is very special to me for that reason - I went into my first playthrough with the intention of continuing his adventures & it spiralled into a genuine love of mine.

I made Ara for that first playthrough & I've made a few more since then. I kept up with the sneak thief theme, but after playing through the Shivering Isles something really stuck with me. I loved the idea of a 'fall from grace' but it was something a little more than that? She wasn't falling from grace, she'd already done that, but she was going home. This gave her a greater purpose. I feel like I was able to cement her character more after committing to the HoK & Sheo situation while still honoring her past renditions as a trickster, thief & misguided youth.

Ara doesn't fit the traditional role of a hero. She never has. Her loyalties are sporadic, her feelings are just as hypocritical, she's a young woman desperate for purpose & identity while adamantly fighting off authority & genuine aid. The Shivering Isles questline works for her because Sheo's own obsession & manipulation meshes so well. Ara needed identity. He forced one upon her while simultaneously convincing her it would be self-serving. She was given praise, power, a wonderland to rule, & a mentor (Haskill) who is predisposed to codependency. She is a prisoner & victim of the realm - but she is blissfully unaware of this. Sheogorath ruined her & any chance she had of recovery. & she thanks him for this. She thinks he was the only one to understand her. She thinks this is her best outcome. Her current storyline is an accumulation of years of a toxic young miss finally finding purpose - albeit a horrific one. Ara is finally happy. & it's a lie. I'm not sure I'll ever find anything more suiting.